05x01 - Nega-Timmy/Love at First Height

[bunniefuu]

♪ Timmy is an average kid

♪ That no one understands

♪ Mom and dad and vicky always giving him commands ♪

♪ The doom and gloom up in his room ♪

♪ Is broken instantly

♪ By his magic little fish who grant his every wish ♪

♪ 'Cause in reality, they are his... ♪

♪ Odd parents, fairly odd parents ♪

♪ Wands and wings! ♪ Floaty crowny things!

♪ Odd parents, fairly odd parents ♪

♪ Really mod, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod ♪

♪ Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice ♪

♪ Giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake! ♪

♪ Odd parents, fairly odd parents ♪

♪ It flips your lid when you're the kid with ♪

♪ Fairly odd parents!

Yeah, right!

Crikey! The bad parent hunter here,

And this week,

I'm after another set of neglectful parents.

Hello, mother. Hello, father.

Can you help me with my homework?

We don't have time to help you with your homework

Like good parents should.

We're watching our favorite show,

"The bad parent hunter."

Yeah! So here,

Go play with this dangerous acid

In the street.

Bloomin' onion!

There's their boy now.

Jackaroo chips!

These bad parents stink out loud.

Ooh! I know.

Look at what they did to that poor kid who looks like timmy.

And look at that horrible, ugly house they live in.

Safety first.

What's he doing here?

I thought he was hunting bad parents.

Aah! Aah!

[Both gasp]

Both: oh, my gosh!

We're the bad parents!

Right you are, joey!

See you next time on...

Oh! That's a didgeridoo!

That was fun and destructive.

It was funstructive!

Dad: timmy.

Being humiliated in front of a nationwide audience

Has taught us a lesson.

We are going to be better parents.

And by "better," we mean bossier...

And more in your face.

Yeah! Starting right now.

Untie us, and that's an order!

Timmy: crikey!

I'll get you losers.

Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ooh!

Ouch! Ooh!

Take that, you morons.

Who aren't anything like my parents.

No more video games until you take out the trash...

And do your homework...

Both: and brush your tooth

This instant!

Both: ha ha ha!

We're great parents!

And great dancers!

Ugh! My life was a lot more fun

When my parents didn't tell me what to do all the time.

But they're your parents.

It's not their job to make your life fun.

Yeah. Pretty much the opposite...

Like wives.

Aah!

Opposite. Cosmo, that's it!

I wish to do the exact opposite of what my parents say.

What?

Well, this is usually the time

When you tell me that this is a bad wish.

And that he should consider the consequences,

Blah, blah, blah.

Because I'm the opposite of fun?

[Mumbling]

Well, not this time!

Wish away! See if I care!

I wish I had to do the exact opposite

Of whatever my parents tell me to do.

Hello, mother. Hello, father.

Can I watch tv?

You could if I wasn't trying

To be more in your face.

Yeah. So you go to your room right now!

Ok. I won't go to my room right now.

Thanks!

That's my boy...

And my popcorn!

Oh, man, this is gonna be great.

Mom and dad: ahem.

You march right upstairs

And take a bath, young man.

Stay out here and get filthy?

Great idea!

Hey! I was here first!

What a good son.

Oh, I'm so proud of his stench.

[Beeping]

[Oink]

What a beautiful day.

The sun is shining, I still haven't bathed,

And this opposite thing is awesome.

Ahh!

There's nothing more manly

Than living in nature's filth.

What a great wish, timmy.

What?

This is usually the time

When you tell us to unwish the wish.

And that if we don't it'll be really bad,

Because you're so smart and I'm so dumb

And blah, blah, blah.

[Grunting]

Not this time!

I'm fun wanda, remember?

I'm loving this!

Wha-ha!

Well, I guess I'd better go catch the bus,

Unless you want to tell me something like,

"Don't be late," or "go to school,"

Or "don't pretend to be sick

"And stay home playing video games

And eating cheesy pretzels."

No, no.

Just be good.

Uh-oh!

[Cackling]

Oh, no. His dad told him to be good,

And that means he's going to be the opposite--

Evil, pure evil.

Do you know what that means?

Yeah. This is gonna be fun...

Unless you want him to unwish the wish.

No!

How not fun would that be?

See? Isn't this fun?

[Bell rings]

Yahh!

Turner, I don't like that evil look in your eye.

That's the evil look in my eye.

Only one of us can have it.

Who's it gonna be?

I thought you only had one tooth.

Aah!

Apparently it's him.

This could only be the work of...

Fairy bad parents!

Oh, well. Time to seek a new career

That doesn't cross paths with the evil turner.

Wow, wanda.

I have to say,

You're really doing a good job

Not raining on timmy's evil parade.

Ok. So timmy gets to be the bad boy.

What's the worst that can happen?

[Thunder]

[Organ music]

Female voice: preparing to fire

The super-deadly evil super laser

In one super-evil minute and counting.

That's the worst.

In just seconds,

My super-deadly evil super-evil laser

Will fire into space

And knock down this communications satellite!

Oh, wait. That's the worst.

Causing it to crash into mt. Dimmsdale

And reactivate the dormant volcano.

Nope. That is.

What are you doing?

I'm just setting up the camera

For when it happens.

When what happens?

Then the lava will burst the dimmsdale dam.

Then the resulting flood

Will cause a meltdown of the dimmsdale make-up factory.

And once people have no make-up,

All social life in dimmsdale will collapse,

And life in dimmsdale will cease to exist!

Aah!

He's right!

Some people look terrible without make-up.

Nobody's ever seen cosmo without his pancake base and blush.

Oh, it's horrible!

Whoa!

Hey! That's our little secret.

But use that terror.

Yeah, baby, work the terror.

[Screaming]

Work it, baby! Yeah, that's it!

Oh, yeah! Oh! I love it!

Good evening, sir.

I'm denzel crocker of the door-to-door ham company

Of canton, ohio.

[Growls]

Aah!

Aah!

Oh, well.

Time for me to pursue a career as a tour guide.

Female voice: super-evil laser ready to fire.

[Timmy cackling]

Wanda: cosmo!

We have to stop timmy!

Well, finally!

What were you thinking?

How could you let it go this far?

Mom: see?

I told you he had turned the living room

Into an evil lair.

I don't remember telling him to do that.

Timmy, go to your room!

What room?

Now, if you'll excuse me,

It's time to watch my evil plan unfold.

Ok. That is it, evil young man!

Did I mention that my laser could also blow up dinkleberg's house?

Eh... Hang on a second.

I think our evil boy might be on to something here.

Crocker: welcome to the dimmsdale dam.

Built in ,

It is impervious to any natural disaster...

Except for a huge lava flow,

But what are the odds of that?

Aah!

Yah!

Yah!

[People screaming]

Mom: ohh!

The make-up factory.

That's the place that makes your dad look pretty.

We have to do something!

Now, honey, if timmy wants to be evil

And destroy the dinklebergs' house,

Then I say go ahead.

Hi, turner!

Bye, dinkleberg!

Timmy, I want you to be as evil as possible.

[Screaming]

Oh, no! My mother is nothing without her make-up!

Oh, no! Your father is nothing without his make-up!

And I'm nothing without my eyeliner

And tooth gloss.

I wish that wave was gone!

Yah!

Oof!

Ha! I'm alive,

And I look fantastic.

Yay! The deadly wave is gone,

And timmy is back to normal.

And when did we get those cats?

Sorry, mom and dad.

I was just going through an evil phase,

Which is over for good

Because you're both such good parents.

Aww.

Let's go have some ice cream.

Whatever you say.

Dad: I'll be right there,

As soon as I say good-bye to dinkleberg.

All of us!

Mmm. Whatever you say.

Man, that was too close!

And I hope you learned your lesson.

From now on,

Do a better job of keeping track of timmy,

Like me!

Because you're so responsible,

Blah, blah, blah,

And I'm such a nag,

Blah, blah, blah.

Stop mocking me!

You should put some make-up on, man.

Crikey!

Man on radio: good morning, fans of fun.

Hey, be sure to get to adrenaland early

To get that perfect parking space.

[Snoring]

Hey, dinkleberg,

There's a bug on your nose.

[Tires screech]

Aargh!

Did somebody knock?

[Belch]

Wow! This park is great.

That hurt.

All: yay!

Dad: I told you leaving early was a great idea.

This is the best parking spot

We've ever gotten at adrenaland.

And there's the heart stopper,

The toughest, bestest, and most lawsuit-prone roller coaster in the world!

[Sirens]

Ok, but remember,

We meet here at exactly : or...

Wow. He never moves that fast

When it's time for chores.

Man: uh, ma'am, did you lose your child?

They can help you over here.

But we didn't lose our child.

That's the password. Welcome!

Both: aah!

Woman: welcome to adult land.

Oh, my gosh.

It's a kidless adult paradise.

Hey, that's great!

We can use that as our slogan.

Both: cheers!

Heart condition? Go ahead.

High blood pressure? Right this way.

This is gonna be great.

I can't wait to ride this ride.

You can't ride this ride.

What?

You're way too small.

But don't worry, kids.

There's plenty of exciting rides for kids your size,

Like the snail-go-round...

Whee?

Or it's a dull world.

Yay!

Ohh.

Oh, man! This reeks!

[Chewing]

[Gulp]

This so does not reek!

That's a great slogan, too.

"Losing our son"

Was the best thing that ever happened to us.

We have a son?

[Grunting]

Aah!

Give it up, timmy.

By my calculations,

None of us will be tall enough to ride that ride

Until we're years old.

Good thing we brought our emergency tall kid kit.

Cool! We're adult-sized.

Now what?

Now you come with me

Because you just lost your son.

We--i--

I didn't lose my son.

And that's the password.

Aah!

Chester? A.j.? Oh, great.

Now I'm too short and there's nobody else around

To be miserable with me!

Not true.

Look. I'm everybody's favorite waste-filtering organ,

Kenny kidney!

And I'm, uh, penny pancreas.

And I need to get tall enough

To get on that ride!

And I am not waiting until puberty!

I wish I had the body of a -year-old!

One growth spurt coming up.

Cool! I've got the brain of a -year-old

In a -year-old body.

You know what that means?

You're a supermodel?

Yep, and it's time to ride some rides.

And count some of those new hairs on your chin.

All: yay!

It's our favorite waste-filtering organ,

Kenny kidney!

[Cheering]

What about me?

I'm a pancreas.

Yeah, right!

You're not even a vital organ.

My dad had you removed

At age .

You can be removed?

Now, what time

Were we supposed to meet timmy, chester, and a.j.?

: .

Ooh! You've dropped your mustache.

I got it!

Tall boy coming through.

New hairs. Here I come,

Obviously meeting all height requirements.

Great! I need a single rider.

Oh, man! This is awesome!

Hey, cutie, what's your name?

Gah!

Gah? What kind of name is gah?

Gah? Oh, it's, uh...

Norwegian?

Hmm. Norwegian, hunky...

[Gasp]

Are you a norwegian supermodel?

Uh...i guess?

Aah!

Those are the top two requirements

For my dream man!

Oh, gah!

I'm never letting you out of my sight.

How do you say "I love you" in norwegian?

Help?

Oh! I love your accent.

It's norwegilicious.

Hang on to me tight, gah.

Are you nuts? Why would I hang on to you?

Aah! My safety belt!

[Screaming]

Man: clear!

So, gah,

Do you, uh, want to ride it again?

Help!

I love you, too.

Aah!

Yah!

Gah, I will follow you to the end of the earth,

Until someone richer or better-looking shows up.

[Vicky laughing]

Buckteeth and pink hat on a kid?

Eww.

Buckteeth and pink hat

On a norwegian male supermodel?

Yay!

[Laughter and cheering]

Cosmo, wanda, help me!

Vicky won't leave me alone.

I can't have any more fun.

I wish I wasn't anymore!

And I wish I wasn't stuck in this stupid kidney suit,

But we can't all be norwegian male supermodels,

Now, can we?

Aah!

Look! Gah, the norwegian supermodel!

Yay!

Oh, gah! This is gonna be so fun.

Yeah, for me.

If I can't shake her loose,

Maybe I can smash her loose.

Ah, mr. Gah,

Would you mind if I took your picture and then...

Sold it on the internet?

No, thanks.

I have my own.

Ha ha ha!

Gah, will you sign this calendar

I bought off the internet?

I have a calendar?

Girl: aah!

Stop flirting with him!

He's mine!

Did you hear? Gah's in the park.

No way. Wow.

Uh, you really seem to have a knot here.

Sure you don't want to take off your coat?

Uh...

All: children?

We've got a runner in quadrant .

The old fake mustache, sit on each other's shoulders,

Hide in a trench coat trick.

Ok. Time to go back to the other park

And "find your kids."

No! No, please!

Did we mention gah is in the park?

[Cheering]

Gah? He's norwegilicious.

I've gone gaga over gah!

Gah!

Playing hard to get only makes me want you more!

Oh, man! It's almost : .

I got to find cosmo and wanda.

Cosmo! Wanda!

Oh! I don't believe it!

It's gah!

Will you sign my kidney stones?

Finally! You got to help me.

Vicky's fallen for the -year-old me,

And everybody thinks I'm a hunky norwegian male supermodel.

Help!

Well, we can't exactly change you back

Right here where everyone can see us.

Well, we need to find someplace quick before--

Vicky: there you are!

Too late.

Ha!

We still have time for one more ride together--

The marriage go round.

I do. I do.

I do. I do.

Wait! A ride? That's it!

Let's go on that one!

[Gasp]

Oh, gah!

Sorry, kids, but this kidney has got to go.

We won't tell anybody about adult land,

Honest.

We know you won't...

[Teeth chattering]

Because if you do, you won't get to keep these.

It's gah, the talking scandinavian superdoll.

I have a calendar?

Both: deal!

I just love the tunnel of love.

It's so nice... And dark!

Yep, the perfect place to make a wish.

Or smooch.

Right. What?

Mmm-mmm. Mmm.

[Grunt]

Aah!

[Timmy shouting]

Nice diapers.

Thanks.

Aah!

What did you do with gah?

Uh, he had to go back to...norwegia?

Norwegia?

I'm coming, gah!

Mush!

Time to go meet my parents.

[Sob]

I can't believe we missed gah.

I blame you.

Dolls: I'm norwegiriffic.

Ahh. Ahh.

Timmy, I hope you learned a lesson,

That being tall...

Yeah, yeah, doesn't make me a better person.

I know.

Just dreamier.

Aah!

What a day!

I got to ride the heart stopper,

Experience puberty, and get rid of vicky.

I wonder where she is.

Vicky: gah, where are you?

I've lost my supermodel!

And that's the password.

Aah!