10x10 - Which Is Wish/Nuts and Dangerous

[bunniefuu]

[jazzy music]

- ♪ Timmy's still an average kid ♪

♪ That no one understands

♪ Chloe's his new neighbor

♪ And she's ruining all his plans ♪

- Ahh!

- ♪ All the wishes

♪ In the world

♪ So why should he care?

♪ Jorgen has reported there's a fairy shortage ♪

♪ So Timmy has to share

♪ His OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

- More than one? - This should be fun!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Feather suit, nature boots, laser sh**ting, rescue ♪

- World peace, kale treats,

bunny feet, real neat!

- What? No! Leave me alone!

My fairies! Get your own!

- ♪ OddParents, fairly OddParents ♪

♪ Timmy, beware, you'll have to share ♪

♪ Your fairly OddParents

- Yeah, right!

[jazzy music]

♪

- I can't believe I have to organize the garage.

- [coughing]

How come I never get to be the broom?

- Because the broom is the boy at the wedding, silly.

- Why do I even open my mouth?

- Ooh! I found my old gravity boots!

Why don't I ever use these?

Oh, I remember. They used to make me black out.

But not anymore-- [snores]

[muttering] Mayonnaise.

[snoring] And some juice.

[together] Worst day ever!

Jinx!

Double jinx!

- Stop saying "jinx"!

Hey, I'm not blacking out anymore--

[snoring]

- Timmy, I'm in a state of utter torment.

I've been chosen to participate

in a hamburger-eating contest for charity.

- Oh, I hear you. Charity's the worst.

- No! I'm a vegetarian. I hate meat.

- I love meat. You know what I hate?

Organizing.

- Really? I love organizing.

Hello!

This garage is a tantalizing disaster!

I would love to put everything

in color-coded, alphabetized boxes

with labels!

[whooshing]

- Boy, if only there was some magical way

you two could switch places for the day,

but of course that's not possible.

- That's it! I love meat. You love organizing.

I wish we could switch places.

[fanfare]

- Awesome! I'm pretty.

And I get to eat hamburgers.

- Awesome! My teeth are big

and I get to spend my entire Saturday organizing.

- Ah! Wait. Timmy sounds like Chloe,

and Chloe sounds like Timmy.

This is blowing my mind!

- Oh, no. His mind is bad enough when it's not blown.

- Now Wanda's voice is coming out of Wanda!

Now it's coming out of me!

No wait, that was just me imitating Wanda.

Now who am I imitating?

- You! - Aah!

There are strangers with wings in the garage.

This always happens when I wear these boots.

Aah! Whoopee!

I found my electric roller skates

and rainbow disco wig.

[rockets blast]

I'm on a roll...

[crashing, car alarm sounding] into a truck!

- Chet Ubetcha reporting from the annual

Dimmsdale Charity Hamburger Eating Contest!

Disturbingly large men, a tiny girl,

and what appears to be a yeti.

Stuff your faces! [air horn blares]

[gulps]

- Hey, lightweights, you gonna eat those?

Didn't think so.

[gulping]

[crowd cheering]

- We have a winner! What's your name, little girl?

- Timmy! I mean Chloe!

Let's go with Climmy. Climmy TurnerMichael.

- That's the worst name ever. [Timmy belches]

- What do you know, you just won

the burping contest too.

- ♪ La-la-la sorting, sorting ♪

♪ Labeling labeling

Loving, loving this!

- I skated into, like, cars

and I think I broke my brain

because I'm hallucinating my garage is clean.

Also, who am I?

- You're Timmy's Dad. Which would make you my dad

because of course, I'm Timmy!

- Oh, Timmy! I don't know which I love more:

your organizational skills or your new girly voice!

My little boy is finally becoming a woman!

- I love being Timmy with the girly voice!

Lamp, TV, and-- [screams]

What have you done to me?

- Turned you into a winner. Yeah!

[stomach growls] Ooh, that was the sound of you digesting

about pounds of ground chuck.

You scared a yeti.

- You have turned the temple that is my body

into a toxic dump!

I demand we switch back!

- Fine with me. You have a stomachache.

[belches] By the way,

you also won the burping contest!

Yeah. The prize was more burgers.

- Stop eating!

Cosmo! Wanda!

- Oh, Chloe.

You've really let yourself go.

- She's me and I'm her! - He's me and I'm him!

- Mind blown!

- Don't worry, guys!

We'll just switch you back to your old selves.

- Cosmo, these aren't our wands.

- They aren't? Oh, right. Funny story.

With my mind blown and all,

I confused our wands with the garbage.

It's more funny uh-oh than funny ha-ha.

- You threw the wands in the garbage?

We're toast if you can't find them!

- I like toast. [sniffs]

In fact, I smell burning toast right now.

In an unrelated note,

my wand smells like a fish carcass.

- You two are just gonna have to wait this out

until I find our wands.

If you need me, I'll be in the garbage.

- Okay, we can pretend to be each other

until Wanda finds the wands.

Just stay calm.

Stop eating burgers!

- Chloe! Dinner time!

- Ooh, I could eat. Hope you're having burgers.

- We made your favorite: mock cheese and kelp casserole!

- Ugh! It looks like a dog threw up in the grass,

and it smells like low tide.

- Oh that smell is me, sweetheart.

I harvested the kelp directly from the ocean.

- Yeah, I'm gonna pass on the weird hippie food.

I got me a trophy full of burgers.

[both scream]

- It's dinnertime, Timmy with the girly voice.

Would you set the table?

- [screams]

- No, Timmy.

That's where we keep your father's scary puppets.

- I knew that because I am Timmy.

And I also know that the plates are

actually to the left of the sink.

Please be there. Please be there.

[screams] - No, Timmy.

You know that's where we keep

your mother's medieval fighting equipment.

- What? Who keeps axes and scary puppets over the sink?

I mean, we do, of course!

Please remind me where we keep the plates!

[both laughing]

- We hide them like Easter eggs,

so they could be anywhere.

- [screams]

You people are so disorganized

I can't take it!

[whooshing]

Forks go in the fork drawer.

Spoons go in the spoon drawer.

Scary puppets go in the scary puppet drawer.

[screams] That is a really scary puppet!

- That's Nasty Ned.

He's very handsome, and he's my favorite.

I have to say that, or he gets mad.

- Quiet! I am organizing!

- Uh-oh. Timmy's girly voice has turned into a meanie voice.

Maybe he's hungry.

I'll get the hamburger casserole out of the laundry hamper.

- Where else would you put it? The refrigerator?

[both laughing - That's funny.

- Yes! That's exactly where you put it!

Stop laughing!

[muffled screaming]

Ugh! This whole thing's a nightmare!

I hate being you!

Your parents keep food in the hamper,

and it took me a half hour to floss your big front teeth.

- All right. Calm down.

First of all, what's floss?

And second, don't worry. Wanda will find the wands,

and everything will be back to normal.

[Wanda screaming]

Or not.

[pounding on door]

- Feed me.

- Hey, is there anything else

you want to tell me about your closet?

- It's impeccably organized.

Oh, and it contains Brittany, my vicious, man-eating plant.

You have to feed her every ten minutes all night,

or--well, I'd just feed her if I were you.

- Feed me. - [screams]

- Timmy. - [screams]

- Defend yourself or perish.

- Ha, sounds like you met Vinnie.

I wished him up to att*ck me at night

and keep my fighting skillssharp.

Terrible idea.

[both scream]

- Hey, thanks for coming by, Mr. and Mrs. Clampickle.

Our son has been acting crazy lately,

and like any good parent,

we naturally blame the influence of someone else.

In this case: your daughter!

- What a coincidence. You see, our daughter has been

acting crazy lately too.

And naturally, we blame your son.

- Well then, we're in agreement.

No wait, we're not. Wait, are we?

- Relax, you guys. I'm still the same old Chloe.

[belches] By the way, I'm failing math.

- [sighs]

- Chloe Mother Teresa Neil Armstrong Carmichael,

you know your father faints at the mention of failure.

He also faints from chocolate milk.

The doctors never figured out why.

- As a loving mother, all I can say is

that Timmy was weird enough before.

But when I see him spend a half an hour flossing,

I know there's some bad mojo going down.

The only logical solution

is to forever separate our son from your daughter.

- Done. In fact, Clark and I are taking Chloe and moving away,

as soon as Clark regains consciousness.

[both gasp]

- Fine! Take your demon daughter and be gone!

[sad violin melody]

♪

- I don't want to be you anymore!

But I'll also miss you if you forever move away!

Please don't tell anyone I said that!

- Technically you didn't say it, 'cause you're me.

Anyway, I have an idea!

All we have to do is prove to our parents

that we're back to ourselves.

And the best way to do that is by being ourselves.

- Okay, you guys. My mind's not blown anymore.

I figured out that, Chloe, you're Timmy.

And, Timmy, you're Chloe.

[together] Not anymore!

- Mind re-blown!

[steam building and exploding]

- Mommy, Daddy, please don't make me move away.

My odd behavior had nothing to do with Timmy Turner.

I was just going through a brief rebellious phase.

I brought my math grade back up to an A plus infinity,

fed Brittany-- and look,

I'm stuffing my face with kelp casserole.

It's so deliciously kelpy!

- Oh, honey, our baby's back!

Chocolate milk for everyone!

[sighs, then thuds]

- Okay, Chloe, we'll stay.

Just please take off some of that makeup.

You look like a scary puppet, sweetie.

[peaceful music]

- Hey, Mom! Hey, Dad!

Let's have some laundry hamper casserole!

[belches]

- Oh, honey, our baby's back!

- Let's celebrate with some jousting

and a scary puppet show!

[dark music] [Timmy screams]

- Phew. I'm glad our costumes worked.

- I found Wanda.

She got recycled into a box of cereal called Fairy Smacks.

- The wands are the prize.

[horn fanfare]

- Yes! I wish we were ourselves again!

- It worked! We're us again!

- I'm not pretty anymore, but who cares?

- Oh, no.

Chloe's imitating Chloe

and Timmy's imitating Timmy!

Mind blown!

[growling]

Hi, Brittany.

- [chomps]

- Mind eaten!

- Easter egg!

[jazzy music]

♪

- Ah. It's a perfectly relaxing Saturday.

We can do anything we want.

- Ah, I say we go bowling.

Wanda, let's start a fish bowling league!

- Only one thing could ruin this day.

- Oh, Timmy!

- And that's it.

- I'm hot!

All of my money is burning a hole in my pocket...

literally!

I don't trust banks, so I keep it in the oven!

- Okay, Dad, what do you want?

- Am I not making myself clear?

I Skgoogled careers on the interweb for people like me

who are filthy rich and have no talent,

and I came up with: movie producer!

- Perfect timing!

The Dimmsdale Film Festival is next week.

- Yay! Entering the festival with Timmy would be

a perfect way for us to have a father-son bonding experience.

Remember when we bonded as father-son beekeepers?

- It was fun till we got the bees.

- Yeah! Who knew they'd respond badly

to being taunted with a pointed stick?

- Pretty much everyone. Even monkeys know that.

- You know, making a movie together could be awesome, Dad.

- Ooh! Can I be in it?

I've always wanted to be an actress.

In fact, I'm starring in my own one-woman show in my room.

I sing and dance and play show tunes on a kazoo.

I'd invite you, but my parents say

it needs to be a secret.

[laughing maniacally]

- Okay, well, it's not a secret anymore,

but I kind of wish it was.

Anyway, let's do this, Dad! Dad?

- Yeah, I'm poking at you.

What are you gonna do about it, fish?

- Dad, stop taunting my fish!

- Aah! The bees are back!

Okay, I'm the director.

And action!

Why is there no action, Timmy?

- Well, the action doesn't just magically happen, Dad.

We need to get a script, actors, and a crew.

- Eww, that sounds like a lot of work!

- One crew member coming right up!

I've always wanted to be in the movies!

- Ooh, you have the voice of an angel.

You'll be our voice coach!

- Fabulous!

[crashing, shattering]

- [plays kazoo fanfare]

Presenting Totally Chloe!

[playing kazoo]

♪ Make 'em laugh, make 'em cry ♪

♪ Make 'em happy and make 'em sigh ♪

♪ I'm entertaining, I'm not a bore ♪

♪ My act's not a secret anymore ♪

I'm Totally Chloe!

- Wow. Anyway...

- And that's lunch! Hoagie time!

I can't believe how great this is going!

The movie's making itself!

But you know what we still need, Timmy?

Star power!

- You have your star: Totally Chloe!

- Eh. Anyway--

Timmy, what about your friend Catman?

Hmm? He's a big star.

- Don't say his name!

He'll appear out of nowhere and ruin our lives!

- Who? Catman?

- Did someone say my name?

- I did! And you're hired!

- Aw, come on, Dad. He's nuts.

- Not this time, citizen Timmy!

This time, you're Nuts. And I'm Dangerous,

just like it says here in the script I wrote,

aptly called "Nuts and Dangerous."

- Featuring Totally Chloe!

- Anyway, my script's a high-octane action flick

starring yours truly as Dangerous,

the complicated superhero walking on the razor's edge.

And you, Timmy, play Nuts,

my loose cannon sidekick who plays by his own rules.

- You know what?

That actually sounds pretty cool!

I get to wear a superhero costume

with awesome gadgets.

I can't wait to do this!

I am not doing this!

You didn't tell me Nuts was a squirrel!

- Originally, he was gonna be a buff superhero

with a cool iron suit,

but that seemed crazy, so I made him a big squirrel

with the face of a human boy,

'cause that makes sense.

- Aw nuts! - Perfect!

From now on, that's your catchy catchphrase!

- Although I would say it more like

[bellows] "Aww nuts!"

[car alarms sound]

- Every great movie starts

with a big, attention-grabbing opener,

and I have just the thing!

And action!

[expl*si*n]

[both scream]

- Yes! I blew up Dinkelberg's house.

That should be a crowd pleaser! I know it pleased me.

- Thanks for putting me in your movie, Turner!

It was worth losing all the possessions that connected me

to the meaningful moments of my life and made me feel whole!

- Don't sass me, you ungrateful monster!

Also, I forgot to put film in the camera,

so start rebuilding your house so I can blow it up again!

- Anything for the arts, Turner!

- Stop throwing tantrums, you diva!

Moving on!

Let's rehearse for the next scene.

- Oh! I love rehearsing.

But no one gave me a script.

- And action!

- Looks like we have

the perfect crime on our hands, Nut Job.

- It's not Nut Job. It's Nuts.

- Stick to the script,Timmy!

It's the only way we can bond!

- Stop taunting me with the stick.

- Cut! I'm a genius!

Moving on to the next scene!

- Wait, there isn't another scene.

The rest of this so-called "“script"”

is just Catman's to-do list.

- I playfully refer to it as my Catman-Do List.

Get it? It's a cunning play on words.

- I can to-do things!

- Anyway...

- Catgirl! When did you get here?

- Oh I'm not Catgir-- Wait, is Catgirl in the movie?

- What movie? - This movie!

- If we're making a movie, then Catgirl has to be in it!

- Yes! Then I am Catgirl!

♪

- Dad, bonding or no bonding,

there's no way I'm going into that store

dressed as a giant squirrel.

- Oh, you have to, Timmy.

Remember when you signed that little girl's autograph?

Can I have your autograph, Mr. Movie Star?

That was no little girl! But good voice, huh?

It was me tricking you

into signing a legally binding contract!

- How did I not know that? - I give the credit

to my excellent voice coaching!

- Action!

[dramatic music]

- Let's see. What's on my Catman-Do List?

Tuna, buttermilk.

Catgirl, you see any cereal with live mice in it?

- Are you talking to me-ow?

See what I did there?

I have my own catchy catchphrase!

♪ Totally Catgirl

- I've never been so humiliated in my entire life.

And that's saying something.

- Oh, I love your broken spirit, Timmy.

But your delivery needs work. Voice coach!

- Try it like this, Nut Bag.

- It's Nut Job! I mean Nuts!

- Do it like the lady says!

- Just get me out of here

before anyone from school sees me!

- There he is, popular girls!

Turner, I heard you were walking around

in a stupid squirrel suit,

so I brought all the cheerleaders from school

to humiliate you!

[all laughing]

[camera shutters clicking]

- I'm a movie star!

- Cut! Genius! It is Hoagie Time!

And action!

- Okay, my blind date is supposed to have

a red bow in her hair.

- What kind of lunatic puts a blind date

on their to-do list?

- A romantic lunatic, Timmy. I mean Nut Bag.

- Uh-oh.

I just spotted my date, and she's a real dog.

[hissing]

[growls] [shrieks]

[barking]

- Well, this could not get any worse.

- Hey, Turner! I brought in some squirrel hunters from Louisiana!

They're all named Billy Bob!

There's the squirrel I promised you boys.

And he's a big'n!

all: Them's good eatin'!

- Dad, those men want to mount me on their wall!

What do I do?

- Every movie needs a chase scene,

so run, Nut Butt!

To the nutmobile!

[fast-paced fiddle music]

all: Yeehaw! - Action!

- Freezer's gonna be full of squirrel meat this winter!

Yeehoo!

Aah!

♪

[chittering]

- [screaming]

- House rebuilt.

I hope Turner appreciates it.

- Get out of the sh*t, Dinkleberg!

- Aah! [expl*si*n]

Cut!

I got everything but your house exploding, Dinkelberg.

You know what that means!

- Happily rebuilding as we speak, Turner!

It gives my life purpose!

[squirrels chittering]

[engine zooms] - That's a wrap!

Oh, Timmy. What a great day of bonding.

This was more fun than taunting things

with a pointed stick!

- You put me through the worst day of my life!

- "Worst Day of My Life"?

That's a great name for a sequel.

- There's not gonna be a sequel!

In fact, I'm never gonna spend

another father-son bonding day with you again.

People hunted me!

So, sorry that I don't feel like we bonded!

- Would it help if I buy you popcorn at the film festival?

- No!

Maybe! If it's a large!

- Done!

[upbeat tune]

♪

- Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chet Ubetcha

welcoming you to the Dimmsdale Film Festival.

Our first film was directed by Timmy's Dad.

It's titled "Nuts and Dangerous."

- Hello. It's me, Timmy's Dad.

I wanted to make a movie

to bond with my son, Timmy, AKA Nuts.

[audience laughs]

Don't laugh at Timmy.

Laugh at me,

because I'm the one who's Nuts.

[laughter]

Are you laughing?

I can't tell, because I'm in a movie.

I'm Nuts because I ended up hurting Timmy's feelings,

making him mad,

and getting him hunted by a busload of Billy Bobs.

- ♪ We didn't find cereal with mice ♪

♪ And now Timmy's dad's being nice ♪

♪ Totally Chloe

all: Anyway...

- I feel terrible.

And not just because this squirrel costume

is riding up.

I'm sorry, Timmy.

- Say it the way I told you!

- You're fired!

The point is, I care way more about you

than any stupid movie, Timmy.

Please, please forgive me,

[dramatic music]

- You got it, Dad.

all: Aww.

all: Yee-haw!

[both scream]

all: Yee-haw!

[audience cheering]

[expl*si*n]

- Anything for the arts!

- I just got an idea for a movie.

It's called "Nuts & Dangerous."

- No!

- ♪ Totally Chloe

- You're fired!- Oh.

- Hoagie time!

[jazzy music]

♪

- ♪ Billionfold

[bolts f*ring]

- ♪ Frederator