03x07 - Christmas Special

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "All Creatures Great and Small". Aired: 1 September 2020 – present.*
Watch/Buy Amazon  Merchandise


Based on a series of books- series revolves around a trio of veterinary surgeons working in the Yorkshire Dales beginning in 1937.
Post Reply

03x07 - Christmas Special

Post by bunniefuu »

EVA: Dear Mum and Dad,

Darrowby is very different
from home.

The family I'm staying
with are nice,

but a bit strange too.

James and Tristan are funny.

They remind me of the
Tin Man and the Scarecrow,

still waiting to go on
their adventure.

You're lifting your elbow!

Play with fire,
expect to get b*rned!

TRISTAN GRUNTS

Mrs Hall's definitely
the good witch,

but Helen is that, too.

You have to watch him,

we'll have all manner
of funny spellings going on.

Siegfried's quite grumpy.

He's like the lion, he roars a lot,
but he's not really scary.

Don't be sour, Mrs H,

just because I'm blessed
with a vocabulary

more heterogeneous than most.

Siegfried!
What's wrong with 'Scrotch'?

I did warn you.

There's no wicked witch,
or flying monkeys.

Which is good,
because they definitely are scary.

What does it even mean?

I'd rather not say
in polite company.

SHE CHUCKLES

I'll write again soon.
Lots of love, Eva.

PHONE RINGS

That'll be Ma!

Darrowby ---.

Urgh! Just some old man.

Oi, careful!

Sorry about that. Yes?

Hello, Major, it is the
veterinary practice, yes.

It's just an evacuee
we have staying with us.

She will be safer here, I'm sure.
As for the rest of us...

Oi, paws off!

But it's not even a real word!
Yes, it is!

What can we do for you?

I'll have one of them down
to you, first thing.

Bye now.

Good of you to come
so promptly, Farnon.

For this young fellow,
it's no trouble at all.

We were giving him a run out
yesterday afternoon,

then he pulled up quite suddenly.

He seemed to be carrying
his foreleg.

Yes, I can see it's swollen.

HORSE GROANS

Warm to the touch.

Could be muscular, or possibly a
small fracture of the medial splint.

That sounds rather serious.
Not always.

Good. The Colonel will be pleased.

He's taken a stake in River.
Keen to see how he runs.

He asked after you, actually.

Well, your boy at any rate.
Which boy is that?

Tristan, your brother.

The Colonel wondered
if he was a relation.

I'm sorry, I still don't follow.

His call-up to the
Royal Army Veterinary Corps.

He volunteered, didn't he?

Yes, but he's in
a reserved occupation.

It's my understanding

he's going to get his letter
in the next day or so.

So, what d'you think?

Will this horse be fit to race
in the Boxing Day meet?

What? No, of course he won't.
Don't be ridiculous.

You just said it wasn't serious,

and this may be the last chance
this horse gets to run.

The Colonel said in
the next few days?

You sound disappointed, aren't
you proud he's going to serve?

Tristan's many things,
but he's not a soldier.

Neither were any of us...

..before we were.

I could have a word
with the Colonel.

There may be a way to hold him back.

One good turn deserves another,
wouldn't you say?

If this horse runs
when he's not fit,

there's a danger
of really serious injury.

Then you best see him right.

SHE PLAYS GENTLE MELODY

Your piano's out of tune.

I'm sure that's it.

Time for breakfast.

NOTE RINGS

I'm stuck here, and there's another
attempted raid over Glasgow.

My dad said he saw our lads
flying out to see them off.

Nothing in the post
for either of us, I take it?

No, still waiting.

You'll be told if and when
you're needed.

Mrs Pumphrey called.

Ah, Tricki been at
the mince pies again?

She said it were a cat.
Tricki ate a cat?!

THEY LAUGH

Don't be silly! It's a stray.

She sounded quite upset about it.

I'll head up there this morning.

You been practising piano, Eva?

Aye. Who the heck is Noel?

It's No-EL.
You know, the Christmas carol.

That's when you all go around
singing at night, in't it?

Have you never been
carolling before, Eva?

I'm Jewish.
We have Hannukah instead.

It goes for eight whole days.

You light a candle on
the Menorah and say a blessing.

And you get presents,
and chocolate coins every day.

That sounds like a lovely thing,
why don't we do that here?

What did you call it?
Hannukah, and it's too late.

It started on the
th of December this year.

Oh, I'm sorry we missed it.

Since I'm with you this year,

does that mean
I get to do Christmas?

If that's what you'd like.

You were out early this morning?

I wanted to see River first thing.

You two, yard, please.
You're not going to sit?

Sorry, Mrs Hall,
I've rather a lot to get through.

Tristan, now, please,
if you wouldn't mind.

Need a lift up to the farm?

You're all right. Me dad's dropping
some eggs at the market,

I'll go back with him.

Can I come with you, James?

If you like.
But finish your breakfast first.

River's coming to stay with us
for a couple of days' treatment.

James, get the door
to the barn, please.

Tristan, start bringing in the hay.

Is it a sprain?
Possible stress fracture.

I'm hoping once we get
the swelling down

we'll discover that's not the case.

Wouldn't he be better off
resting at the stables?

I want to keep a close eye on him,
he's got a race in a couple of days.

That doesn't give you much time.
No, it doesn't.

Thank you, Herriot,
weren't you going up to Pumphrey's?

Tristan, I...I'd like you to stay.

If you could stay,
keep the leg bathed with water,

it's important
to keep it as cool as possible.

I'm think I can manage that.

Just for an hour. Then you
can get back to the surgery.

Not that we have any patients.

You have to be here
in case you're needed.

An emergency
could turn up at any time.

If you say so.

I just...

I'm going to get some air.

Right, let's have a look at you
then lad, shall we?

So, there's a good witch,
and a bad witch...

And a little man who lives
behind a curtain,

he's called Oz, and he's a wizard.

Wow! And Dorothy has ruby slippers
that can magically take her home.

This is a big house!

It was the strangest thing.

We hadn't seen her
for a week or more,

and then she staggered into
the kitchen a few hours ago,

with this little chap in her mouth.

She laid down
and hasn't moved since.

Tricki's been beside himself
with worry.

Debbie's one of the few felines
that Tricki has no animus towards.

She's a little underweight.
The poor girl's exhausted.

Can I examine him?

Here you are.

CAT MEWS

So, you must be
the new vet assistant

we've been hearing all about.

I'm Eva. Eva Feldman.

Marjorie Pumphrey. Delighted.

How are you enjoying your stay?

You must miss your mother
and father terribly.

Not really.

Home's boring,
I don't even have a garden,

or any brothers and sisters
to play with.

I'm sure you give
your parents the runaround.

Pa works late at the w*r office,
and Ma's always busy.

Take it from one who knows,

those who are able to entertain
themselves are never bored.

Are those chocolates?

Um...yes.

Tricki's not one for chocolate.

Far too rich for his taste.

And I've far more than I can eat.

Thank you!

This is a big house for one person.

Yes, it is.

Which is why I like it when people
come to visit me.

The kitten's in fine health,

but the constant feeding has really
taken it out of Debbie.

What she could do with is a break.

So, we'll have to separate them,
and bottle-feed the kitten.

Won't he miss his ma?

If he can smell his mother
he won't take the bottle.

We'll have to take him back with us.

Oh, dear.

THEY CHUCKLE

CAT MEWS

Cheers! Cheers.

Merry Christmas.

So, go on then, what's happened?

Well, Florence got rather
too attached, poor love.

I mean, naturally, I didn't
want to lead her on, so, you know...

Mm.

Oh, God, all right,
I asked her to marry me.

Triss!

It seemed like a good idea
at the time. Don't laugh.

I'm not! Sorry.

Was it very romantic?

Where did you do it?

Next to the drain at
the side of her house.

SHE LAUGHS

Please, Maggie.

You pillock!

I am. But I'm learning.

I shouldn't laugh.
I'm sorry if you were...upset.

I admit it wasn't entirely painless.

But at least it brought into focus

what I really should
be doing with my life.

You put your name forward.

You and James
will just have to wait.

And it turns out I am actually
needed here after all.

I've seen four pets this week.
Four! Just think of that.

Another one there? Best not.

There might be a dog
that needs its nails clipped.

But put a pint in the till for
Arthur, for when he gets back.

Oh, you don't need to do that.
Add it to my bill.

I've been meaning to talk
to you about that.

Maggie!

What on earth were you thinking,
letting it get that high?!

You said you'd be able to pay.

Yes, I said that.
Of course, I said that!

HE SIGHS

Slim pickings for Christmas
this year.

We manage, somehow.

At least I don't have a party
to cater for,

didn't feel right in
the times we live in.

Any word from Edward?

Still at sea.

He says he's enjoying himself,

though I suspect he's only saying
that to stop me worrying.

Oh, I don't know, maybe he's
found his place in the world.

What've you got there?

Just getting rid of
a few bits before I leave.

I might see if Charlie will give us
a bob or two for it. Leave?

I've, uh,
I've taken a job over in Hull.

I'm with my sister for Christmas Day

and then I'm leaving after that.

Oh.

I wun't gonna go without
saying goodbye.

Well...

..of course, we'll be
sorry to see you go.

Well, I suppose this is it then.

No, it isn't.

You can't just...

Stop by tomorrow evening, we're
having a few people over for drinks.

I thought you weren't
having a party this year?

We are. I mean, we're not.

Just a few people,
a glass or two of sherry.

All right, well, I suppose we could
drop by on the way.

I'll see you then.

I didn't think we were having
a party this year.

Well, we're not,

it's just a few people coming
round for food and drinks,

carols around the piano.

That sounds like a party.

Oh, are we having a party? No!

Well...yes, a gathering.

A select few people
for a glass of sherry.

Which people?

Oh, you know, just...people.

Gerald.

ALL: Gerald!

He's going. So, he's coming...to
say goodbye, because he's going.

That's all.

He's not drinking.

When a cat wants her kittens
to feed, she licks them.

I'm not licking a kitten!

You don't have to!

But if you stroke his neck,
it'll feel like his mum's doing it.

SIEGFRIED: Ah, here we all are!

Mister Farnon, would you mind
switching off the light for me?

Yes, of course.

We thought it'd be nice to try
some of Eva's Jewish traditions.

I know it's late,
and we don't have a proper Menorah,

but I managed to find
eight matching candles.

Should I light one?

We light a new candle each day
of Hannukah, and sing the blessing.

Dad always asks mum
to sing it usually.

But I could try if you'd like.

That'd be lovely.

# Baruch atah Adonai

# Eloheinu Melech ha'olam

# Asher kid'shanu b'mitzvotav

# V'tsivanu l'hadlik
ner shel Hanukkah. #

Now, you say Amen.

ALL: Amen.

CLOCK TICKS

RAT SQUEAKS

Don't worry, Vonolel,
we'll find a way.

Still prefer the company of
animals to people, I see.

Easier to understand,
with considerably less back chat.

And they go where you lead them.

Not true in Tristan's case.

He's determined to leave.

You think you have so much time.

Then they're gone,

and you're left wondering
what to do with your life...

..apart from counting the days
till you see them again.

Sorry, Mrs Hall,
I'm worrying about Tristan,

and Edward's out at sea somewhere.

Having children's the most
wonderful and painful thing

you can do in life.

I wouldn't know.

You would.

You do.

He really doesn't understand what
he's getting himself in to.

It's not your choice to make.

Mrs Hall?

I was rather hoping this might
have a drop of whisky in it.

I were rather hoping you'd drink
that and then take yourself to bed.

I know you don't
want to go back in there,

but you're domesticated.

If I let you out...

..the world will eat you up.

RAT SQUEAKS

When do we put the socks out?

The stockings go up tonight,
right by the fire,

so Father Christmas can find
them when he goes down the chimney.

We've Midnight Mass before then,

we all go to the church
and sing together.

And when we get back we'll put a
mince pie and sherry out,

and a carrot for the reindeer.

Will I get presents?

Well, you've been good,
haven't you?

Mm...sometimes.
THEY LAUGH

I'm sure that'll be plenty enough.

You know I actually did get
a lump of coal one year.

That didn't happen!

Father Christmas must've
thought you'd been very bad.

Oh, he did. He most certainly did.

Not a great deal has changed,
to be honest.

Eva, why don't you show Jenny that
kitten of yours?

I'll do that.

Any animals in surgery
this afternoon?

None. I'm going around the bend
with boredom.

You used to love having
your feet up, doing nothing.

That's before
there was a w*r to fight.

Mrs H, have you seen
Siegfried this morning?

He's back up at the Major's.
Left about half an hour ago.

Oi, where are you off to?

Sebright Saunders, see if my
brother doesn't need a hand.

Now, you hold on a moment.

Thank you.

Thank you!

He's certainly travelling over
the ground a little easier.

Well, we've managed
to reduce the swelling,

but we're very much treating
the symptom, not the cause.

The Colonel is grateful
for all your hard work, Farnon.

He's had a word with
the North Yorkshire Division.

Your lad won't be required
for the duration.

He can ignore his call-up letter.
Thank you, Albert.

HORSE BRAYS

HORSE BRAYS

He's pulled up!

The prognosis isn't good.
I'm afraid it's as I said.

The injury is still there,
what this horse really needs

is three months' rest and a gradual
programme of rehabilitation.

Is there nothing you
can do for him?

I told the Colonel
you would get him running.

He won't take too kindly to the
news that you're pulling him out.

Perhaps we could
take away the pain.

We could give him an injection

before the race that
would allow him to run.

Isn't there a chance you
make the injury worse?

He could break his leg completely.

Thank you, Tristan. I'm going
to be busy here some time,

you should go back to the practice.

Siegfried, I don't think...

Now, please.

Tell the Colonel he'll be ready
for the starter's tape.

I'm sorry to ask you,
and I know it's unfair.

But he's my little brother.

I'll be there with you,

and I'll do everything I can
to take away your pain.

He looks like he's
doing much better now.

I've given him a name.

He's called Toto.

How'd it go with the Major?

Confusing.

Siegfried is determined
to let him race.

This is the only one,

so you know where to say
your goodbyes with Gerald.

HE CHUCKLES

Where is everyone?

I thought you were
going to invite people.

You didn't give us much notice.

I told Gerald we were having people
over, if it's just us he'll think...

Think what? What will he think?

Well, that it's some sort of a ruse.

To what end, one wonders?

You look lovely, Audrey.

It's part of her ruse.

There is no ruse! Paws off.

Saving them for someone special?

Don't worry, I've asked Maggie

to bring some people over
from The Drovers.

Oh, go on then, Triss,
I'll have a whisky.

So, what happened with River?

He broke down.
Siegfried's with him now.

He's talking about giving him
an injection

to get him through the race.

That doesn't sound very sensible.

He suspects the horse
has a stress fracture,

I don't understand why he would
even contemplate letting him run.

I'm as lost as you are.

What could be more important
to him than the wellbeing

of an animal in his care?

Of course.

What is it?

He's doing it to keep me back.

What're you talking about?

He's got his old army pal
to scupper my enlistment.

He wouldn't!

I guarantee it.

Who's the attending vet
at the racecourse?

Norris.

What are you going to do?

I'm going to tell him that
River is unfit

and shouldn't be allowed to run.

I know, I know it's uncomfortable.

But it'll give you some support.

Albert, I've just been putting
on this support...

Give it a rest, Farnon!

I'm not sure I like your tone.

River's been pulled
from tomorrow's race.

The attending vet received
a phone call

informing him that
my horse was UNFIT!

You can't think it was me?!

I've been doing
everything in my power

to see that he makes
the starter's gate,

against my better judgement
I might add.

Oh, then there must be another vet
going by the name of Farnon.

He'll be here.

DOORBELL RINGS

Evening.

Oh, good evening, Mr Dinsdale.

Heard there was a party going.
Thought I'd come for one.

It's more of a gathering, really.

Well, so long as there's ale,
you can call it what you like.

Not got many takers this year?

Father Christmas is
lacking his usual charm.

How many more of these beggars
do I have to see?

Well, come in then.

Urgh!

CAT PURRS
This one seems happy with you.

He's put on some weight already,

Eva's done a fine job
taking care of him.

He's called Toto now. Oh!

How's Debbie doing?

Oh, much better, she's been asleep
mostly, waking only to eat,

but I can see she's
getting her strength back.

Does that mean Toto will have
to go back to his ma soon?

I think Toto's rather enjoying
his adventure away with you,

wouldn't you agree, Mr Herriot?

Certainly seems to be.

I know you're only saying that

because you think that looking after
the kitten would make me happy.

You're a sharp one, aren't you?

My mum says I should be careful else
I cut myself one of these days.

SHE CHUCKLES

I rather think Toto
will be happiest with you.

I'm sure his mother will go back
to her roaming ways anyway,

once she's got her strength back.

Eva? There's someone here
I think you'd want to meet.

I'll hold him for you.

CAT MEWS

There we are.

Are you ready to meet
Father Christmas, Eva?

He looks funny.

Right, are you coming in or not?

Dad, be nice!

You think she'll be all right?

It might put her off Christmas
for good!

THEY LAUGH

So, you've been good then, lass?

Are you the real Father Christmas?

Your beard doesn't look real,

and I don't think it's very nice

to pretend to be
someone you're not.

Ah, well, he's a pal of mine,
and he says it's all right.

You know, if you lie
you get a lump of coal.

Here.

Do you not have any sweets?

No. I've got an orange.

Christmas is strange.

DOORBELL RINGS

Don't worry, I'll get it.

You made it.

I said I would.

You did.

I mean, come in, come inside.

Let me get your coat.

I'm just stopping on my way through,
I can't stay.

Go on in, I'll fix you a drink.

Shush, you.

I'd better get back to the pub.

It'll be anarchy without me there.

Well, Merry Christmas.

Thanks for coming, Maggie.

And thanks for being a good friend.

You too.

SHE CHUCKLES

Oh! You're really not
going to pounce on me?

No. I wouldn't do that to you.

Or Arthur. Aye. Neither would I.

DOOR OPENS

SIEGFRIED: Tristan?

Jenny, would you mind taking this
to Gerald for me?

And...

..don't let him leave.

What'll you have me do? Hobble him?

If that's what it takes.

Here you go. Thank you.

SIEGRIED: Tristan?!

So, Hull, eh?

Yeah. Yeah, Hull.

You'll call the racecourse first
thing, you'll admit your mistake,

and that will be the end of it.

No.

No?

Negative. Never.

Ne.

"Ne"? "Ne"?!

Yes, it's Latin for no.
No, it isn't!

There is no Latin for no, it
needs combined with another word...

Cos that's what's important
right now?

The animal always comes first,

that's what you've drummed into me

for the last God knows
how many years.

Not in this case, it doesn't.

Why, I wonder?

You think I'm stupid, don't you?

Well, we're certainly short
of evidence to the contrary.

Mr Farnon, that sort of talk
really dun't help.

You spoke to the Major,
but it wasn't to HELP my enlistment,

it was to hold me back.

Jenny?

You didn't think I was up to it.
It's not that at all!

It really isn't, love.

You've never believed in me!

God, not this again, how many times
do we have to go through this?!

Triss, just listen to him.
Let him explain.

No! No, I've heard it all before.

None of it's his fault, I don't know
what's good for me, only he does.

Everything I've done
was in your best interests.

What about what I wanted?!

There was no room for that.

And you never stopped reminding me
how much better you were.

A better student, a better vet,
a better son, a better man...

You were a perfectly good son!

Mother and father doted on you.

And you resented me for it.

Oh, poppycock!

You'd grown up and left.

I was their new son
and you always resented me for it.

I resented you because
you were their favourite.

They loved you more
than they ever could me,

Father especially.

You were this miracle child.

God's gift,
that they both thought

they were far too old to receive.

Of course I resented you for it!

But then they d*ed.

And you were stuck with me.

And I knew I'd never be able to
replace the love they gave you.

Especially from Father.

He was your father too.

I never wanted to
hold you back, Tristan.

I wanted you to be better
than I am, just as he did.

You're my little brother.

If anything happened to you
it would be the end for me.

I'd die if I let anything
happen to you.

I bloody love you, you damned fool.

One of you going to say something?

This came for you this morning.

You're still in a reserved
occupation. You don't have to go.

Yes, I do.

If I don't, then...

I've always looked up to you.

I've always wanted
to be just like you.

It's far less fun than
I make it look, I assure you.

I can't be who I'm supposed to be,

if you're always there
reminding me of who I'm not.

I have to go.

I need to go.

I know.

I know you do.

You all right?

Not particularly.

I've been practising
the whole day to get it right.

Oh!

SHE PLAYS 'THE FIRST NOEL'

Come on then, boy.

DOG BARKS

I only wanted to protect him,
to do what's best for him.

That's all I've ever wanted.

Deep down, he knows that.

I should have listened
to you, Mrs Hall,

you always seem to know
what's best for me.

I'm sorry, Mr Farnon.

I'm sorry, but I've got to go.

Gerald?

Are you all right, Mrs H?

Mm.

WHISPERING: Oh, no.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

He's gone.

DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

Gerald?

You came back.

I picked up the wrong coat.

Oh.

But I'm glad I did.

It's Christmas! It's Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

Everyone wake up!

KNOCK ON DOOR

He's been!

Now, Eva, it's tradition in this
house to wait until after...

Let's forget about tradition
this year, shall we?

Oh, what have you got then?

STOCKING JINGLES

There's no coal, at least.

That's because you've been so good!

Do you not like what
Father Christmas has brought you?

No, I do.

Mrs Hall?

A little something from all of us.

Thank you!

They're not exactly like Dorothy's
magic shoes, but I've done my best.

Try them on, then!

Come 'ere!

Don't they look marvellous?

First class job, Mrs Hall.

There's no place like home.

HEELS CLICK

THEY LAUGH

They don't work.

Why are you all looking at me?

I'll go.

Not hungry this morning?

He should go back to
be with his mother.

She doesn't say it,

but I think Mrs Pumphrey
would like that, too.

Family should be together.

You know...

..it's all right to be upset.

You're allowed to miss home.

You're allowed to cry.

You're all so nice.

But we're not them.

Are you sad your brother's going?

I'm very sad indeed.

You're allowed to cry, too.

Even though you're a grownup.

Thank you for reminding me.

Firstly, thank you, Mrs Hall,

for managing to make so much
with so little,.

Um, I'm not well-practised
at being serious.

Maybe I should try for a change.

Christmas is a time for family,

those that are here,
and especially those who are not.

All of us are missing someone.

Most, we'll see another time.

Others, we won't.

I want to remember them,

and give thanks to those who filled
the hole they left behind.

Especially my brother,

who made a promise
to our dying father

that he would take care of me...

..make sure I was properly educated

and that I would make
something of myself.

So, he was in for a hiding
from the outset.

It wasn't that bad!
No, it definitely was.

But he never gave up on me,

no matter how much
I wished he would.

And I certainly gave him
enough reason to.

Lesser men would have thrown in
the towel, but he didn't.

And I want to thank him for it.

I love you, Siegfried.

So, I guess the only thing
left to say...

..is Merry bloody Christmas.

ALL: Merry bloody Christmas!

Make sure you keep looking
after that little kitten

before he goes home,
won't you, Eva?

You look after yourself, too.

Here.

That car is my pride and joy.

She's in safe hands. Goodbye, Triss.

See you, pal.
You take care of yourself.

You too.

I'll make sure I write
and tell you all about it.

Make sure you do write to let
us know how you're getting on.

I will.

Take care of my brother for me,
won't you?

As much as he'll allow.

Time to go.

ENGINE REVS

I can probably manage from here.
No, I'll see you on.

You've done enough. Right.

All right, right, well, um...

..just don't do anything stupid,
promise me?

I promise I won't disgrace
the family name.

No, Tristan, just bloody well
listen to me for once.

Don't do anything stupid,
do you hear?

Promise me.

And break the habit of a lifetime?

TRAIN HORN HONKS

Well, eh, I suppose this is it.

Oh, we're huggers now?
Yes, we bloody well are.

I'm so damn proud of you.

TRAIN HORN HONKS

I've got to go.

Go. Go on, go.

You've got your ticket?
I don't need one.

What do you mean?
Oh, and I'm sorry about the tab.

Tab? What tab?
I might have racked up

a not entirely insignificant bill
at The Drovers.

What?! Is that why you're going?
A bar bill?

Tristan?

Tristan?!

WHISTLE PEEPS
Post Reply