04x04 - Max to the Future

[bunniefuu]

♪♪

Ooh. Love me a good limbo.

♪ How low can you go ♪

♪ Unh! How low can you... ♪

Oh! [Groans]

Why-y-y-y-y?

It's the bow staff.

I'm training with it so I can
add it as one of my special

skills to our z force application.

Wanna see some more moves?

No, no! I like my bones.

Check it out.

If we list enough amazing
talents on this baby,

we'll stand out from
our competition.

Well, I was gonna give you
my list of special skills,

you know, before you went all
kung fu Phoebe on me.

All right, let's see.

Freeze breath, heat breath,
telekinesis.

Max, we both have these powers.

Special skills are what
you bring to the z force

that no one else does.

Well, then, put down
slow-motion arm farting.

[Slow arm fart]

I will not.

Okay, fine.

What did you put on your list?

Well, uh, to name a few...
Codebreaking,

conversational Japanese,
power core, Turkey calls,

knot-tying, base jumping,
spelunking, accents,

photographic memory,
and speed-talking.

Well, you didn't read the last
special skill on my list:

Inventing gadgets.

Ha! Yeah.

Oh, you're serious?

Come on, Max.

Name of your gadgets
that didn't backfire.

- The nosehairlizer.
- Gave Nora a beard.

- The supervillain eye patch.
- Turned a child evil.

- The brain meld.
- Speaks for itself.

Well, you haven't seen
my newest gadget.

A... brush?

It's not just a brush, Phoebe.

It's a gel brush.

Hair gel and brush
together at last!

Wow. Can't wait to see how
this blows up in your face.

- [Gel squirting]
- Ugh! Ah!

Oh. Yeah. That's out.

[Screaming]

[Heavy thud]

♪♪

Hank: [Groans]

Barb, I keep getting mean chirps

from that guy on
my bowling league. Look.

"You put the gut
in gutterball."

Why is someone sending
you mean chirps, dad?

Ever since everyone found
out your dad's thunder man,

this guy Nico is saying
he used his powers

to win last year's
bowling championship.

- [Cell phone chirping]
- Butthead?

No! You're the butthead!

Uh, Hank?

Watch your language.

- Butthead!
- Barb: Okay.

Sorry.

It's just that I won this
trophy fair and square.

And there's nothing
that two-faced magician

can say to change that.

A magician? Named Nico?

As in the amazing Nico?

He's our favorite.

Yeah, he's way better
than that magician

you got for my birthday...
Good enough Greg.

That guy made the fun disappear.

Nico's big trick is that
he can walk through walls.

Whoop-di-do. I fly
through the ceiling every day.

Yeah, about that?

Please stop.

Dad, can you take
us to meet Nico?

Absolutely not.

Guys, dad's taking us
to meet the amazing Nico!

No, no, no, no, no, no,
I didn't say that.

Billy, Nora, Chloe:
Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad!

Aw, that's so
sweet of you, Hank!

What just happened?

♪♪

She says I stink at gadgets?

She's the one who stinks.

Yeah, she does.

I worked all night on this.

Yeah, you did.

Don't tell me I don't
have any special skills.

Okay, mommy. Love you, too.

Oh, I'm sorry.
Were you talking to me?

Yes.

I've been talking to you
for the past hours

while I've been working on
my most amazing project yet.

I ignored you for hours?

I gotta call and tell my mom.

Stop calling your mom!

Phoebe:
[Grunts]

Like my new skill?

Annoying entrances?
That's not new.

Whatever. What'd you
wanna talk about?

Phoebe, what's the best
way to fight crime?

Well, the hero league
manual says...

- Wrong!
- Aah!

The best way is to stop
it before it happens.

I give you...

The Crimecaster!
[Gadget beeping]

It's a gadget that crunches
years of crime statistics

through a state-of-the-art
algorithm.

Heh! Al-go-rithm!

Did you sleep last night?

- No!
- Oh, okay.

Point is, it predicts
future crimes

so we can use it to catch
criminals in the act.

Heh. In the act!

I'm sorry.
I really need a nap.

Wow, that gadget
sounds unbelievable...

As in I am unable to
believe that it works.

[Gadget beeping]

Max's computerized voice:
It's crime time.

Looks like it's about
to prove you wrong.

It says, "Hiddenville High
will be vandalized tonight."

Unless we're there to stop it.

All right, fine, Max, if this works,

then we will put gadgets
on our z force application.

[Clapping hands]

I know. They never shut up.

Hold on.

Mom, I think they heard me.

♪♪

♪ What you see ♪

♪ Is not what you get ♪

♪ Livin' our lives with a secret ♪

♪ We fit right in ♪

♪ Bet you never guessed ♪

♪ 'Cause we're livin' our lives ♪

♪ Just like all the rest ♪

♪ A picture perfect family ♪

♪ Is what we try to be ♪

♪ Look closer, you might see ♪

♪ The crazy things we do ♪

♪ This isn't make believe ♪

♪ It's our reality ♪

♪ Just your average family ♪

♪ Trying to be normal
and stay out of trouble ♪

♪ Livin' a double life ♪♪

♪♪

[Suspenseful music]

- Phoebe?
- No one's vandalized the school yet.

We've been here all night.

Oh, that's your newest skill?

Telling me how long
you've been doing stuff?

Actually, no. It's calligraphy.

"Max is bad at gadgets."

Oh, that's nice. Can I see it?

- Sure.
- I am not bad at gadgets!

Face it, Max.
Your Crimecaster's a dud.

But don't worry.
We're still in good shape.

I've got plenty of special
skills for the both of us.

What's that supposed to mean?

It means our application
is loaded with great stuff.

Well, yeah, with your stuff.

Max, it's our stuff. We're a team.

Now let's go home
and add pep talks

to my list of special skills.

Too bad throwing garbage
away isn't a skill.

- [Gadget thuds]
- Dang it.

- [Gadget thuds]
- Dang it!

- [Gadget thuds]
- Come on!

♪♪

Right, according to
Nico's chirper account,

he's here having lunch.

Oh, is that him?

No, it's just good enough Greg.

Ta-da!

Never give up, Greg.

There's amazing Nico.

Hey. Nico.

Oh, hello, Hank.

Yeah, listen, uh, my kids
wanted to meet you.

They're huge fans...

For some reason.

I love my fans.

Oh, my gosh.
He's looking at us.

I'm freaking out.

Stay cool, guys.

Anyway, uh, could you
please sign their pictures?

I already did.

[Hands whooshing]

Nora & Billy: Whoaaaaa!

Can you show us your trick
where you walk through a wall?

Anything for a fan.

But not here.

These walls don't
look very clean.

The walls at our
house are clean.

You can come do the trick there.

Oh, absolutely not.

- Dad said Nico can come over!
- I didn't say that.

Chloe, Nora, Billy:
Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad!

That's so nice of you, Hank.

Why can't anyone hear me?

I'll see you tonight, kids.

In the meantime,
have a burger on me.

Or is it on you?

[Hands whooshing]

- Awesome!
- Whoa!

Where's mine?

Open your hand.

Chicken nuggets? You're amazing.

It's really nice of you
to put our differences aside

and do this for my kids.

Oh, I'm not doing this for your kids.

I want that bowling
trophy, cheater.

No way. I am not a cheater.

Well, you're about to
cheat your kids out of

seeing the trick
"The Hiddenville Gazette"

called "wall-to-wall fun."

Fine.

The trophy for the trick.

- My address is...
- No need.

I already got it...
From your wallet.

[Hands whooshing]

By the way, you paid
for those burgers.

Magic!

♪♪

Yes, Mrs. Colosso, I give
him Tummy Tickles.

Why are you making
me talk to her?

Five minutes out of your day.

That's all she asks for.

Hey. Max?

I have good news.

The school was horribly
vandalized last night.

Well, technically
that's bad news.

But the good news about the bad
news is your gadget works!

Max:
"You've been vandalized"?

Wow. Good thing I'm not the kind
of guy who says I told you so.

But he is.

He told you so.

Thanks, buddy.

Well, hey.

I've never been happier
to be wrong.

Adding gadgets to your
list of special skills

is really gonna turbocharge
our application.

Great. Thanks.

Congrats, Max.

You're actually pulling it off.

My highlights?
They look natural, right?

Uh, no.

I mean not telling Phoebe
that you were the one

who vandalized the school.

What would make you think that?

I caught you red-handed.

Seriously, there's red paint
all over your hands.

Fine, okay? You got me.

But... I just had to convince
Phoebe I'm good at gadgets.

Don't want her to think I don't
bring anything to the team.

But isn't your dumb gadget

gonna keep predicting crimes
that won't happen?

No, don't worry.
I took care of it.

[Sighs] Hey, Max?

I want to take a picture
of the Crimecaster

to include it in our application.

We can't.

I threw it out after you called
my beautiful creation a dud.

Well, could you just make
another Crimecaster?

Impossible. It was one of a kind.

And I b*rned all my notes

after you called
my beautiful creation...

A dud. I get it.

It's just sad, really,
that the Crimecaster

didn't predict the crime of
you not believing in me...

Because now it's at the bottom
of the Hiddenville dump,

never to be found again.

♪♪

I found it!

That's amazing.

- [Gadget beeping]
- Max's voice: It's crime time.

- And it still works!
- No!

Way!

It says there's gonna be
a delivery of smuggled Gold

at a fish warehouse
downtown tonight.

We're gonna be there to stop it.

Or we can call the Fish Police.

That's a thing, right?

Max, this is our bust.

We're gonna take those
smugglers down.

Uh, the z force is gonna
freak when they see

how good your gadget is.

[Sighs]

Phoebe's gonna freak when
she finds out I lied to her.

She's never gonna
trust me again.

Unless we make sure
she doesn't find out.

And I know just how to do it.

Yeah, I hear what you're saying.

We fake the Gold Heist
and Phoebe never suspects

the Crimecaster doesn't work.

I was gonna say blast
her into space.

Why is that your
plan for everything?

♪♪

[Suspenseful music]

♪♪

Okay. According to
my Crimecaster,

the bad guys should
be here any minute.

This is so exciting, Max.

Your machine is gonna change
crime-fighting as we know it.

Oh, um, one question.

What's on my face?

It's a beard.

We have to blend in
as dock workers.

Now, wear some of this
Tuna Cologne.

- [Spritzing cologne]
- Phoebe: [Coughing]

I'll scout the perimeter.

Cool. I'll go throw up.

Colosso, is everything set up?

Aye!

Phoebe will be shiverin'
her timbers when she thinks

the bad guys are here to
nab the smuggled Booty.

You're supposed to be a dock
worker, not a pirate.

And you're supposed to
be good at gadgets.

Now, to set the mood with
some soothing dock sounds.

- [Whale calls]
- Whale noises?

Aye! The elephants
of the deep.

Would you turn that thing off?

This has to work.

Phoebe cannot find out
I lied to her.

She won't... thanks to
Captain Colosso.

But best be ready.

A couple of scallywags
are about to ent-arrrgh!

[Door creaking sound effect]

Colosso: [Deep voice]
Time to get that Gold.

Phoebe: Max, I just
heard the crooks.

She's fallen for it.

Hey, I'm gonna go investigate.

No, let's just keep listening

and hope they don't
find a secret way out

that'll prevent us from
seeing or catching them.

[Computer beeping]

Female computer voice:
Alert! Alert!

The amazing Nico approaching.

He's not that amazing.

Computer voice:
"The Hiddenville Gazette"

- called him...
- Don't make me buy a doorbell!

He's here! He's here!
He's here!

Where is he?

I'm right here.

Magic!

Billy, Chloe, Nora: Wowwww!

Thanks for having me for dinner.

I hope you like flowers.

[Hands whooshing]

Oh, thanks! They're beautiful.

[Sniffing]
And they smell so nice.

All right, we've all seen flowers.

So, kids, are you ready to see
me walk through a wall?

Billy, Chloe, Nora: Yay!

Pick a wall while
I handle some business

with your father first.

There's so many walls.

Which one do we pick?

I can't take the pressure!

This is too important.

I'd better go ask him.

Quit stalling. We made a deal.

You give me the trophy.
I walk through a wall.

Fine.

Even though I won it fair and
square, I'll give it to you.

All I want is to make
my kids happy.

[Imitating] All I want
is to make my kids happy.

Guys, dad's giving Nico
his trophy for this.

He loves that trophy.

He'll be heartbroken.

There's only one thing that
can make dad feel better.

Watching Nico walk
through a wall?

Yup.

Bring on the magic, baby!

Colosso: [Deep voice]
Now it's time to get that Gold.

Look for the crate
that says, uh, "Gold."

Why would they write "Gold"
on a crate full of stolen Gold?

Well, maybe they had very
little time to put this

all together and they're just
doing the best they can.

Okay, um, let's check
these crates for Gold.

- [Cell phone rings]
- Colosso: Mom?

Yeah, it's going great.

Me and Max are tricking Phoebe.

She's so dumb.

[Powers whooshing]

Colosso?

[Deep voice] Uh...
Pay no attention to

the bunny behind the curtain.

Okay, why would you and
Colosso fake this whole crime?

I mean, unless... [Gasps]

The Crimecaster doesn't work!

How dare you.

Oh, just stop, Max.
I caught you red-handed.

For your information,

this was from when
I vandalized the school.

[Scoffs] So you've been
lying to me this whole time?

Hey, who are these guys?

Doesn't matter.

We're gonna have to
get rid of 'em.

Let me guess, Max,
you hired these two g*ons

to make it look like a real
crime was happening?

No, I've never seen those
two before in my life.

Colosso, tell her.

Traitor!

Where did you even
find these losers?

I mean, look at their
stupid costumes.

- Phoebe, don't!
- Hey!

Wow, his fake beard
is worse than yours.

- Ha!
- Ow.

This is actually pretty good.

That's because these guys are...

- [Heavy thud]
- Max & Phoebe: [Groan]

- Real criminals.
- Yes, I see that now.

♪♪

Time to hand over
the trophy... cheater.

You're more than just a trophy.

You were my reason to
wake up every morning.

[Kisses trophy]

I'm gonna let that one slide

because I know you're
hurting right now.

[Sobbing]

This whole thing's starting
to make me feel bad.

Me, too.

I feel hungry.

And, you know, bad for dad.

So we agree.

Just because dad would
do anything for us

doesn't mean we should let him.

And now I will ask
permission from the wall

to allow me to pass through it.

♪ Ooh, Wally-Wally-Wally-
Wally-Wally-Wally-Wally-Wally ♪

- Nico, stop!
- Why?

Because... we're taking
back our dad's trophy.

I want to stop, but I have
to see how this ends.

Looking for this?

Hey! No! Hey!

- Give it back!
- Hand it over!

- It's mine!
- Kids, it's okay.

If he wants it so bad,
just let him have it.

Listen to your father. Just let go.

Nora: She's right.
We should just let go.

Nico:
Whoa!

[Plaster shatters]

Again! Again!

Hey, dad got his trophy back

and we saw Nico go
through the wall.

Here you go, dad.

Oh, thanks, kids. Oh...

[Groans] It's too bad
I don't have an ice pack.

Or do I?
[Hands whooshing]

Oh! Oh! [Heavy thud]

♪♪

[Handcuffs clanging]

Phoebe: [Grunts] [Sighs]

Just had to go digging
around the dump

to find my Crimecaster,
didn't you?

Oh, so this is my fault?

I'm glad you're saying it.

Hey, I don't get it.

Why did you try to
trick me into thinking

the Crimecaster worked?

So we could put gadgets on
our z force application.

I-I already told you...

I have enough special skills
for the both of us.

Phoebe, I don't want
to get into the z force

because you're great.

I want to get in because
we're both great.

Even if it's not true.

Found some yellow bricks,
boss, but no Gold.

That's Gold, you idiot.

They're smuggling Gold?

That means your
Crimecaster works!

But it was wrong about
the school being vandalized.

What?... Max,
it was vandalized...

By you.

You're right.

Oh! My beautiful creation works!

I can't wait to show
it to the world.

[Gadget beeping]

Stop looking at
me, weird machine.

- [Gadget beeping]
- [Roaring]

- [Glass shatters]
- Crimecaster! No!

Hey, at least now we know
you're good at gadgets.

I just wish we had one
to get us out of this.

Wait.

Phoebe, I do.

[Powers whooshing]

My gel brush.

What? Are you gonna
brush his beard?

He really doesn't like
people touching it.

No, watch.

[Gel squishing]

♪♪

Yes, I am the king of gadgets!

Could you be the Duke
of quieting down?

Hey! They got loose.

Should we get 'em?

No, we should let 'em walk way.

Yes, we should get 'em!

Time to test out my special skill.

♪♪

Ah!

Hey, Tiny?

Let's dance!

Is that a limbo stick?

It's a bow staff!

[Grunts of effort]

♪♪

Looks like it's you and me.

I'm gonna slap those
highlights right off your head.

- Yeah, that's right.
- You're not fooling anybody.

♪♪

[Grunts of effort]

♪♪

[Roaring]

[Barrel clangs]

♪♪

I don't got all day, man.

[Spritzes gel] Uh!

[Coughing]

Stinks, huh?

Smell the bottom of my foot.

[Heavy thud]

♪♪

♪♪

Good job, Phoebe.

Looks like your new skill paid off.

Hey, the Crimecaster paid off...

Which is why we are putting
gadgets on our application.

[Laughs]
I am the king of gadgets!

[Car engine revving]

I got the Gold, ma!
We're gonna be rich!

- [Tires screeching]
- [Chain snaps]

Colosso:
[Screaming]

[Car crashes]

[Hub cap rattling]

Colosso: Max!

Can you call a tiny ambulance?

So anyway, the application's
gonna be great.

Yeah, I feel really good about it.

♪♪