01x01 - The Rise of the Blue Beetle!

[bunniefuu]

That, my friends is the sound of time running out for you.

And at the precise stroke of midnight you two shall be How shall I say? Kaput.

And as I must not be late for my next heist I bid you auf Wiedersehen.

[BATMAN GRUNTING]

[GONGING]

[QUACKS]

What is this now? The fifth or sixth deathtrap I've been tied up to because of you over the years? Hey, I said I was sorry.

Up and to the right.

Who knew his wristwatch was equipped with knockout gas? What, like you've never made a mistake, Bats? Apparently I made one when I thought you could help me stop the Clock King.

Keep complaining.

It gives me more time to show you up.

BATMAN: Sure, Green Arrow and I have our squabbles but that's because we go way back.

As competitive as we are, the truth is we make each other better.

And though I'd never tell this to his face there's no one else I'd rather have at my side in a tight jam than him.

Let's clean the King's clock.

[CLOCK GONGS]

[CUCKOOS]

[INDISTINCT DIALOGUE ON TV]

BOY: Okay, okay, here's one.

Poison Ivy has used her mind control spores on Superman to pit him against Batman.

Oh, oh, and Batman has no kryptonite.


- Who wins?
- Easy.


- Superman.


- Wrong.

Batman.

By using his kryptonite.

You just said he had no kryptonite.

Trick question.

Batman always has kryptonite.

Which I bet he keeps in that utility belt you think holds the answer for any jam he's in.

It's a big belt.

To get to the other side.

Whoa, whoa, go back.

Go back.

The only station to bring you exclusive footage of Batman and Green Arrow taking on the Clock King.

[GRUNTING]

JAIME: Oh, yeah.

This is gonna be so good.

Punch the Clock, baby.

Ren Faire representing.

Hey, your buddy's back, toast.

See? See? Ha
-ha
-ha.

Utility belt.

Ooh, hoo, hoo.

Game over.

[CLOCK KING GROANING]

Think you could ever see me being a hero, Paco? You know, like on a poster up in some kid's bedroom? Beep, beep, beep.

Detecting high levels of geek.

Okay, whatever.

Go home.

I gotta sleep.

Later, Super Jaime.

Dude, how long have you been there? Whoa, geek detector's off the charts.

He wouldn't think that if he knew the truth.

Secret
-identity thing's a bummer, huh? I need your expertise for a little emergency.

MAN [ON TV]

: Breaking news.

A meteoroid appears to be on collision course with a space station.

Just let me change.

[GROANING]

Still trying to figure out the on button for this thing.

Blue Beetle at your service.

This is like a dream come true.

Partners with Batman.

We're not partners.

Not yet at least.

I know.

You teach.

I learn.

BATMAN: I'm here to learn something too.

I could've asked Green Lantern to help with this mission.

But I wanna find out if Jaime has what it takes to be a hero.

The plan's simple.

Just follow my lead and [SCREAMS]

Was I unclear? It's not me.

The suit's taken control.

[BLUE BEETLE SHOUTING]

Hey.

Help.

BATMAN: This kind of thing happen often? [MEOWING]

[CAT GROWLING]

[BLUE BEETLE SHOUTING]

Uh, no.

[BLUE BEETLE SHOUTING]

Let's ride it again, Daddy.

[ALL SCREAMING]

So where are we? Judging from the position of these stars I'd say that wormhole has brought us on the back side of the Milky Way.

And you know that just by looking at dots of light in the sky? Oh, of course, you do.

[ALL MURMURING INDISTINCTLY]

The great one has arrived to save our people once again.

Dude, looks like you rock even on the other side of the galaxy.

I don't think they're talking about me.

Okay, what is going on? Kanjar Ro.

He has returned as he does every season to harvest our bodies for fuel.

Fuel?
- Interesting.


- We did not think you would return.

Not after your last encounter with Kanjar Ro's terrible gamma gong.

[ALL SHUDDERING]

But you have returned to save the Gibble people once again.

All hail the blue one.

Uh, thanks.

Great to be back.

Who are these people and how do they know me? The scarab.

Someone had it before you.

It found a new host after the last guy was k*lled.

Or, um, retired.

Sidekick why do you not bow? Sidekick? Uh, this is Batman, the greatest hero, like, ever.

You should be bowing to him.

What the blue one is trying to say is that now he has returned.

Kanjar Ro will surely be defeated and your people freed.

No.

Not what I'm saying.

And why are you encouraging this? GIBBLES [IN UNISON]

: All hail the blue one.

All hail the blue one.

All hail the blue one.

GIBBLES [IN UNISON]

: All hail the blue one.

All hail the blue one.

All hail the blue one? Now these people think I can save them.

I can barely work this suit, much less be the hero they need.

What they need is someone to believe in.

What I need is for you to play along if we're going to save their people.

But I'm telling you, they're not gonna listen to me.

You have to come up with a better plan.

This is for you.

For returning.

Okay, what do you want me to do, Bats? BATMAN: We're going to need an army to defeat an army.

They may not be much, but they're all we have.

You're gonna have to rally them with some words of inspiration.

What, like in a football movie? [SIGHS]

This will be good.

[GIBBLES CHEERING]

Um, hey.

So, uh, I guess in the past I've handled this sort of thing myself but this time um, I'm gonna need your help to fight Kanjar Ro.

[ALL GASP]

[ALL MURMURING INDISTINCTLY]

Fight Kanjar Ro? How can we? Our weapons are no match for his.

And we are weak.

You must save us with your powers.

[GIBBLES CHEER]

Dude, I tried.

Try harder.

Uh, look, you guys aren't always gonna be able to rely on me.

I mean, what if I've got soccer practice or something? One of these days, you You might have to save yourselves, and the only way to do that is to find the power that's within each of you.

So in conclusion find the power within and, um, you know, it's better to die on your feet than live on your knees.


- They don't have knees.


- Now wrap it up.


- Now wrap it up.

ALL: Now wrap it up.

[ALL CHEERING]

You really think these guys have what it takes to be warriors? Being around their hero will bring out the best in them.

I guess they're not the only ones I'm worried about.

Just remember, this will get you out of a lot more jams than this.

So, uh, what am I supposed to say here? "Let's do it"? "Action"? "Move it or lose it"?
- How about "att*ck"?
- Oh, duh.

att*ck! GIBBLES: att*ck! So cute.

So innocent.

[SCREAMING]

So rich with energy.

[ALL GROANING]

Enough to power our entire fleet for our raids on the Murtha quadrant.

[GRUNTS]

[GIBBLES SHOUTING]

No.

It can't be.

[GROWLS]

Order the Gibbles to search the ship for the captives.

Okay, guys, find your friends.

[GIBBLES CHEER]

You're looking well for a dead man, Beetle.

Kanjar Ro? This time I intend to finish the job.

[GRUNTING AND SHOUTING]

Come on, suit, do something that goes "boom.

" [GRUNTING]

[SUIT BEEPING]

That works.

Hey, maybe I'm getting the hang of this thing.

[GROWLS]

[GIBBLES SHOUTING]

[GROANS]

Whoa.

I just saved Batman.


- I just saved Batman!
- Way to go, kid.

Let's see what else I can do.

[GIBBLES GASPING]

[GASPS]

I did it.

I did it.

I took out a super villain.

[GIBBLES CHEERING]

I rock! BATMAN: Great.

I get to deal with this now.

[GROANING]

Okay, here's one.

It's me versus Kanjar Ro only my feet are trapped in concrete.

Oh, and I'm blindfolded.

Who wins? GIBBLES: You do.

You guys are good.

Oh, this is so cool.

When I said this job was about using your head I didn't mean for it to go to your head.

Oh.

Sidekick must not speak in such tones to the Beetle.

Yeah, sidekick.

[GRUNTING AND SHOUTING]

Follow my lead on this.

There's no need to pull the strings anymore there, Bats.

Got this superhero thing down.

Back for another b*at down? Yes, only this time I'll be doing the b*ating.

[GASPS]

The gamma gong.

[ALL SHUDDERING]

I remembered you had a weakness for a good tune.

[GROANING]

My suit.

What's happening to it? [GRUNTING AND SHOUTING]

A child? My greatest enemy is a child? Then I did crush the beetle the last time we met.

[GIBBLES GROANING]

Come on, guys, don't give up.

att*ck.

Remember? "Power within"? Why would they listen to you? You're just some ill
-equipped boy playing dress up.

But I bet you're not the only one who would look good in blue.

I'll be coming for you, Kanjar Ro.

You should be more worried about what's coming for you.

[GIBBLES SHUDDERING]

[GRUNTING]

If only we could find this "power within" the blue one spoke of.

Not a bad idea.

Power within.

Power within.

I'll find the right frequency to remove that wart from your back even if it kills me.

[SCREAMING]

What am I saying? It's gonna k*ll you.

[GRUNTING AND SHOUTING]

[LAUGHING]

"Don't need your help, Bats.

I've got this superhero thing down.

" [GROANS]

What was I thinking? Oh, I know.

I wasn't.

Well, maybe it's time to start.

Come on, think, what would Batman do? [JAIME SPITS]

Okay, so maybe Batman wouldn't do that but good enough.

[GRUNTING]

JAIME: Hey, K
-Ro.

Time to face the music.

[GROANING]

Started using your head.

No.

[GRUNTING]

I believe we have found the power within.

Once again, you have saved our people.

More importantly, you have shown us how to save ourselves.

And you, Batman have proven to be a worthy sidekick.

Your contributions will be forever remembered.

They say it's the thought that counts.

Now, how about that wormhole? The meteoroid.

It's like no time's passed since we left.

Due to the quantum anomalies of wormholes, none has.

Of course, that's just a fancy way of saying, "That's weird.

" But half the things I encounter on this job make no sense.

Take this mission.

I wanted to see if the kid had hero potential.

Instead, I got to see him become one.

Ready, partner?