06x23 - Party Horse

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

Aw, yeah!

Burgers for lunch!

You get the portobello-mushroom

burger?

You porto-betta believe it!

BOTH: Oh!

Order up!

BOTH:

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Aw, yeah.

This is gonna be good!

Yeah, but I feel like

we're forgetting something.

Mordecai and Rigby!

You forgot to fill

that pothole!

Oh, yeah.

That thing.

Well, see,

I think we'll work better

if we take

a snack break.

We promise

to do it after.

No! No burgers!

Just fill the pothole,

or you're fired!

Dude,

just one bite?

There's nothing on earth

that's gonna stop me

from eating this burger.

[AIR WHISTLING]

MORDECAI:

Aw, man. Now the pothole's

way bigger!

BOTH:

Whoa...

Dude,

come on.

Ah!

BOTH:

Aah!

[DANCE MUSIC PLAYS]

What the--

BOTH: Aah!

Dude, he's waking up.

Huh? Wha--? What's goin' on?

Who are you guys?

We're Mordecai and Rigby.

Who are you?

I'm Party Horse,

and I like to party!

So, hey, uh, where am I?

You're on Earth, dude.

Earth?

Wait. What country is this?

U.S.A., man! Land of the free,

home of the brave!

[GASPS]

Oh! I remember now!

Hyah!

Aw, man.

Benson just hung that up.

I'm sorry. It's just...

U.S. History is a touchy

subject for me.

Whoa. They have U.S. History

where you're from?

Yeah. That's why I'm here

in the first place.

Back on Party Horse Planet,

partying wasn't just a hobby.

It was a way of life.

[DANCE MUSIC BLARING]

Whoo!

PARTY HORSE:

Everyone partied nonstop,

day and night,

around the clock.

It was the best, man.

Unh unh unh!

Unh unh, unh unh unh!

Unh unh!

PARTY HORSE:

Until we had to go to school.

Ugh! Bleb-bleb-bleb-bleb-bleb.

PARTY HORSE:

They said in order

to become legit party horses,

we had to pass

a U.S. History test.

Party's over!

Because Professor Party Horse

is out partying,

I'm gonna have to give you

this test.

[GROANS]

Principal Party Horse, sir?

What is it,

Party Horse ?

Can I go to the bathroom?

I promise I'll come right back

and take this test.

Promise?

Promise.

PARTY HORSE:

And then I totally bailed!

Ntz, ntz, ntz, ntz!

[GUZZLES]

Whoo!

Bottom line, guys--

If I don't pass

the U.S. History test,

I'll never be able

to party again.

Whoa.

That's rough, dude.

I still don't get why they have

U.S. History on another planet.

It's typical school, man!

They don't even know!

So you guys think

you could, like,

help me study or somethin'?

Party horse, we'll help you

pass that test.

Because we've always wanted

to help an alien

pass a U.S. History test.

Yeah, ever since we saw

that movie with the alien.

Whoo! All right!

Ntz, ntz, ntz, ntz!

Okay, what's a good

history topic?

Um... Presidents!

Ah, good one.

"president."

PARTY HORSE: "Of partying."

I don't think

that's a real topic.

No, no.

Just give it a second.

[DANCE MUSIC PLAYS]

Whoa! That dancing baby

knows how to party!

Uh, maybe the internet's

too distracting.

Okay. Let's find

the history section.

[BEEPING]

Huh?

Ntz ntz ntz ntz!

Aw! Aw!

I never thought

I'd say this,

but the library's

too distracting.

[WIND BLOWING]

Um, guys,

I'm worried it's gonna be

hard to throw a party

out here

'cause it's so boring.

That's the idea,

Party Horse.

Now let's study already.

You're the one

who asked us for help.

Aah!

Look. Guys.

I'm gonna be real with you.

I appreciate

what you're doing,

but I think

I'll study better

if I just take

a quick snack break.

Oh, come on!

That's the lamest excuse

in the book.

Yeah, I don't even use that one

anymore very often.

Look, I promise that

if we go eat something,

I'll study right after.

Right after.

You promise?

Promise.

[VIDEO GAME PLAYING ON TV]

Mm. Whoo!

Now this is a snack break!

Okay, we're done.

Now we gotta study.

Aw, come on!

Just one more round!

No! No more distractions,

Party Horse!

Nothing on earth is gonna keep

you from studying for that test!

[AIR WHISTLING]

[CRASHING]

Man, I gotta stop

saying that.

He found me.

I don't know how,

but he found me.

What? Who found you?

[♪♪♪]

Principal Party Horse.

Party Horse,

I know you're in there!

Come out right now and take

that U.S. History test!

I'll take it when I want,

which is never, old man!

[HORN BLOWS]

If you don't come out

and take that test right now,

I'm gonna blow up the Earth

with this detonator!

[BEEPING]

Whoa, what?

Can he do that?

Yeah.

Now, if you don't come out

on the count of three,

your party's gonna end

with a bang!

One... Two...

[BOTH GROANING]

Two and a half...

Wait! Party Horse

just isn't ready yet!

He needs more time

to study!

He's had plenty of time!

Yeah,

but it's not his fault!

We distracted him by getting him

to play video games!

Yeah, that's it--

Video games!

Can't get enough of 'em

here.

Look, just give him one hour

to study. Please.

All right, fine.

One hour.

But if he fails

the U.S. History test,

you'll all be history!

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

Aw, man, thanks so much,

you guys.

Listen, Party Horse--

Partying's cool and all,

but now the whole Earth's

on the line.

You have got to study,

man.

No problemo, bros.

I promise I'm gonna cram harder

than I've ever crammed

so I can pass that test and keep

your planet from blowing up.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

The U.S. History test

consists of

multiple-choice questions.

Fill in each circle completely

with a Number pencil.

You have one hour.

And since

I expect you to fail,

I'm going to make an example

of you

so all the party horses

back home will see what happens

when you party without

a proper grasp of U.S. History.

Good luck, Party Horse.

The fate of this Earth

rests in your hooves.

[TIMER CLICKS]

Begin!

[TIMER CLICKING]

[♪♪♪]

Hm hm! He's got this.

What's going on here?

Did you finish

filling the pothole?

Why is there a horse

taking a te--

Look, Benson, I know

we normally don't have

very good excuses

for why we don't do stuff,

but we definitely have

a good one this time.

That horse right there

fell out of the sky

and has to

pass a History test,

or the Earth

is gonna explode.

What?

Shh! Test taking in progress!

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

[ALL GASP]

Oh!

Looks like

you've been "lead" astray.

[LAUGHING]

[SIGHS]

[DETONATOR BEEPING]

[CHUCKLING]

[ALL GROANING NERVOUSLY]

Look!

[PANTING]

[NEIGHS EVILLY]

[RIGBY GRUNTING]

Aw, come on!

I just put that up!

Grr!

Party horse, catch!

No! I don't want Party Horse

to succeed!

[BOTH GASP]

[GASPS]

[GRUMBLES]

[TIMER CONTINUES CLICKING]

[TIMER DINGS]

Pencils down!

Well, well, well...

Your friends may have led

a horse to a U.S. History test,

but let's see

if they made him think.

Now...give me that test.

Principal Party Horse,

I may have failed this test,

but if I've learned

one thing,

it's that partying is an

important part of U.S. History.

Go on.

Well, sir, it's a known fact

that the biggest events in U.S.

History were all about parties--

The Boston Tea Party,

the two-party system,

the other stuff

that America has with parties.

Think about it, man!

Look, I know I haven't been

the best student in the past.

You've been following me

for a long time,

and you've blown up

a lot of planets because of me.

But I'm done

running from my problems.

Don't blame these guys

for the stuff I did.

They did their best

to help me,

and it's not their fault that

I'm a nonstop party machine.

That's on me. It's time I take

responsibility for my actions.

So please, no matter

how I do on this test,

promise me you won't

blow up the Earth.

[CLAPS SLOWLY]

Responsibility.

I've been waiting a long time to

hear you say that, Party Horse.

It's settled, then.

I promise

not to blow up the Earth,

no matter how you did

on this test.

All right, I'll just take

a look here and--

[PRINCIPAL PARTY HORSE SNORTS]

[BOTH LAUGH]

Dork horse!

Psych! No one's ever gonna stop

this party horse!

Ntz ntz ntz!

Aww! Aww!

Ntz ntz! Ntz ntz!

ALL [CHANTING]:

! !

♪ Uh! Uh!

I'm like a top! Uh! ♪

[GRUNTS]

[HORN BLOWS]

Party Horse out!

No! Party horse!

I never should have promised

that I wouldn't blow up

the Earth,

regardless of the outcome

of your test!

Just please

fill up the pothole.

[♪♪♪]