01x24 - Cliff's Birthday

[bunniefuu]

Mom, This Place
Is Beautiful.

There Aren't
Many Clubs Like This

Left In The City.

(Banging)

Rudy!

I Wanted To Hear It.

It Sounds Like Any Other Piano.

Which Is Why We Don't
Have One At Home.

Mrs. Huxtable?

Clarence Thornhill.

Mr. Thornhill.
How Are You?

I'm Fine,
Thank You.

This Is Vanessa.

How Are You?
Hello.

And My Other Daughter
Here, Liberace.

How Are You,
Liberace?

I Really Appreciate
Your Setting This Up.

It's My
Pleasure.

Your Letter Demonstrated
Such Great Love

Miss Horne
Would Like

Your Family To Sit
At Her Personal Table.

I Don't Know
If That's Such A Good Idea.

Cliff Might Try To
Reach Out And Touch Her.

We Could Have Made These
Arrangements Over The Phone.

You Don't Know My Husband.

When It Comes To Finding Out
His Birthday Present

There's Nothing He Won't Do.

He'll Even Interrogate
His Own Children.

Yeah, Dad's Tricky.

Make Him Think
He's Staying Home.

That's Not Sneaky Enough.

I Think We Should Pretend
We're Making Him A Big Dinner

Let Him Find Out About It

Then When He's Bragging About
How He's Outfoxed Us

We Bring In A Pizza.

Mushroom Pizza.

He Hates Mushroom Pizza!

Mushroom Pizza.

He Won't Know Whether
He's Coming Or Going.

That's A Great Plan.

Mom's Tricky, Too.

Oh, My Birthday Present
Is Around Here Somewhere.

They've Hidden...

(Car Door Slams)

Hello.

Hi, Dad.

You're Home From School
A Little Late.

Uh, Traffic.

At This Hour
There Was Traffic?

Where Was There Traffic?

Between Home And School.

Between Home And School.

Rudy...

Traffic.

Vanessa...

I've Got To Take A Bath.

Your Being Late
Had Something To Do
With My Birthday.

Am I Right,
Vanessa?

Got To Take A Bath.

Rudy?

Traffic!

Make It Tough On Me.

I Love It.

The Joy Of A Birthday

Is Finding Out
What The Present Is

Before One Gets It.

And You Know I Always Do.

Not This Year.

"Not This Year."

You Say That Every Year,
And Every Year I Find Out.

Do You Want To
Tell Me What It Is Now

Or Do You Want Me To Start
Working On The Children?

Work On Whoever You Please.

You Won't Find Out Anything.

Let The Games Begin.

(Humming The Olympics Theme)

Daddy, This Has Nothing
To Do With Your Birthday.

Right.

I'm Serious.

I'm Writing A Song
For The School Choir.

Really?
Yes.

These Are Lyrics.

Okay, Let's Hear It.

"No One Understands Me.

"No One Really Cares.

"I'm An Orphan Of The Darkness.

"A Prisoner
Of My Tears.

"I Walk Alone
In The Rain.

"The Downpour Of Pain.

"The Dreams I Dream
Are Not My Own.

"I Walk Alone.

I Walk Alone."

So?

Daddy!

"I Walk Alone..."

Is This What You Think
About Your Life?

No, But We Couldn't
Write About The Good Stuff

Like Sex
And Politics.

All That's Left Was Self-Pity?

You Don't Like It
Because It's Not Jazz.

Have You Read It
For Theo Yet?

Yes, She Did.

I Don't Want To Hear It Again
Until I'm Really Happy.

That's Just What I Love
About You Guys--

So Supportive.

Maybe It Isn't
A Man's Song.

Have You Read It
For Your Mother?

Yes.

What Did She Say?

"I Walk Alone."

Yes, You Do.

Theo, My Boy.

You Know...

Saturday's My Birthday.

I'll Be Years Old.

Right, Dad.

It's Circled
On My Calendar.

Oh, Thank You.

You Did It.

I Know There's
Going To Be

A Present For Me,
My Boy.

So What Is It?

Come On, Dad.

You Know
I Can't Tell You.

I Know That.

How Old Are You Now?

Fourteen.

Fourteen.

Two Years From Now

You're Going
To Want A Car.

I'm The Only One
Who Can Buy It For You.

So, My Boy

What's It Going To Be?

Okay, Dad.

Okay.

This Year
Everyone Is Pitching In

To Get You Something
You're Really Going To Love.

What Is It?

They Won't Tell Me.

You're Pitching In?

Yeah.

And They Won't Tell You?

I'm Serious, Dad.

They Said, "Do What We Say,"
And That Was It.

They Know I Always Break

So They're Keeping It
From Me, Too.

I'll Tell You
Something Right Now.

I Think It's Just Awful That
People Would Ask You To Pitch In

And Not Tell You What It Is.

And If It
Was Me

I Would Go Upstairs
And Demand To Know

What You Are Getting Me
For My Birthday.

You Know Something, Dad?

They Said
You Would Try That.

Well, That's All Right.

I'll Sit Here
And Take This Abuse

Only Because It's Going
To Be My Birthday

And I'm Going To Get
Some Presents.

Well, Maybe.

You're Going To Look Funny
Walking When You're .

He's Coming!

Sondra, I Was Wrong.

You Need Four Eggs

To Make A Double
Chocolate Souffle.

Okay, Mom, I'll
Add Another One.

I Can't Find
The Big Serving Dish.

Keep Looking.

It's The Only One
Large Enough

To Hold The
Beef Wellington.

Vanessa,
It's Only Theo.

I'm Sorry,
I Heard Footsteps.

Hey, Is This Part
Of Dad's Surprise?

Come On, Tell Me.

Here He Comes!

Sondra, I Was Wrong.

You Need Four Eggs

To Make A Double
Chocolate Souffle.

I'll Add Another One.

Vanessa:
I Can't Find The
Big Serving Dish.

Clair:
Keep Looking.

It's The Only One
Large Enough To Hold
The Beef Wellington.

Mom, Taste
My Gazpacho.

In A Minute.

I Can't Wait Until Dad
Tastes This Caesar Salad.

Please Hand Me The
Homemade Garlic Croutons.

(Whispering)
Everybody, Stop! Stop!

We Got Him.

Cliff.

Uh-Uh.

You Did Not See That.

No, No,
You Did Not See That.

Yes, I Did.

Those Kids Have Been
Working Their Hearts Out

Trying To Prepare You
A Surprise Dinner.

They'll Be Crushed.

My Lips Are Sealed.

I'm Supposed To Trick You

Into Getting Dressed Up
In Your Tuxedo

And Get You Down
To The Dining Room.

Consider Me Tricked.

But Let

The Record Show

That I Found Out
About My Present Ahead Of Time.

You're Despicable!

Oh!

I've Got To Admit It, Cliff

You Are Smarter

Than The Rest
Of Us.

Dear.

Yes?

I Just Love Croutons.

And Dear...

I Just Can't Wait

Until I Chew
On My Beef Wellington.

And Dear...

I Just Love Gazpacho Soup.

Keep Those Eyes Closed.

Okay.

I've Got You.

Here You Go.

All Right?

Sit Down?

If You Like.

You Ready?

Open Your Eyes.

Surprise!
Surprise!

Is This For Me?

Golly, I Never
Would Have Guessed This.

Hope You're Hungry.

I Can't Wait.

Dad, How Does
The Big Four-Eight Feel?

Never Felt Better.

I'm Glad To Hear
You Say That.

Is Traditionally

The Time Of
Mid-Life Crisis.

Really?

Yeah, A Man
Reaches Dad's Age

And He Sees Almost
Half A Century Gone.

Then He Looks Ahead
And Realizes

He Has Less Than
A Third Of His Life Left.

Sondra, I Think
You Ought To Get A Job

Writing Birthday Cards.

Dinner Is Served.

Surprise!

Pizza?

It's Pizza, Dad!

Happy Birthday.

Yeah, Yeah.

Okay.

I Know You Better
Take That Out Of Here.

Come On,
Cliff.

No, No,
No, No.

I'm Not Going
For No Pizza.

You All Can Stop
Fooling Around
Right Now.

Bring Out The Croutons
And The Gazpacho.

Come On, I Don't
Want No Pizza.

Cliff!

No, No,
No, No!

Beef Wellington!
Beef Wellington!

Is That Any Way
To Behave On Your Birthday?

Get It Out Here.

You Better Hurry Up
And Eat This Food.

I Don't Want This.

This Is It!

We Got Him.

We Got Him Good.

Cliff, This Is It.

Where Did You Hide
The Beef Wellington?

Hurry Up And Eat Your Pizza
Because There's More.

We're Taking You Someplace.

Where Are You Taking Me?

Down To The City Dump?

I Don't Want
None Of That.

Wow, Dad.

Wait Till You
See This Place.

Oh, Yeah?

Well, I Smell Candles,
I Hear People...

Must Be In A
Funeral Parlor.

Wrong.

Ladies And Gentlemen

The "Club Premiere"
Is Proud To Present

Lena Horne!

(Jazz Music)

Look At You.

You Know You're Sitting
At MyPersonal Table?

Just AnybodyCan't Sit Here.

I Let Diplomats And Potentates
And Birthday Boys.

You Don't Look Like No Diplomat,
And You Ain't No Potentate.

I'm Just Joking--
I Know All About Him.

This Is Dr. Heathcliff
Hux... Hux...

Huxtable!

Whatever.

Anyway, I Hope He Appreciates
Everything His Wife Did

To Make This Possible Tonight.

You Better Kiss Her Hand.

I'm Going To Sing A Song To You,
Dr. Heathcliff Huxtable

That Just About Covers

What You And Your Wife
Mean To Each Other.

♪ In This World
Of Ordinary People ♪

♪ Extraordinary People ♪

♪ I'm Glad There Is You ♪

♪ In This World
Of Overrated Pleasures ♪

♪ Of Underrated Treasures ♪

♪ I'm Glad There Is You ♪

♪ I Would Love To Live ♪

♪ Yes, I Want To Live ♪

♪ With You Beside Me ♪

♪ This Role's So New ♪

♪ I'll Muddle Through
With You To Guide Me ♪

♪ In This World ♪

♪ Where Many, Many
Play At Love ♪

♪ And Hardly Any Stay In Love ♪

♪ I'm Glad There Is You ♪

♪ More Than Ever ♪

♪ I'm Glad There Is You ♪

And Who Are These
Beautiful Children?

I'm Sondra.

She's Attends
Princeton.

Who's The Handsome Young Man?

Theodore.

Does He Give You Any Trouble?

Maybe Once
In A While.

Hang In There.

In Six Months,
You'll Be Bigger Than He Is.

I'm Vanessa,
And This Is Rudy.

Do You Have A Boyfriend?

No, Ma'am.

What About Leon?

That Little One,
I'll Have To Bite Her.

I Saw You
On "Sesame Street."

I Was Singing
With Kermit The Frog.

Can I Meet Him?

I'll Try To Set Up
A Date For You.

Miss Horne,
I'm Denise.

Hello,
Denise.

How Old Are You?

Sixteen.

I Want That Year Back.

I Blew .

I Walked
Around

In A Blue Funk,
Feeling Sorry For Myself.

You Sure Hit That
On The Button.

She'll Grow Out Of It.

When?

When She Realizes
What She's Got.

And She's Got A Whole Lot.

I Noticed It.

You've Got
Lots Of Love

Right Here
In Your Family.

That's Why
I Wanted To Say Hello.

I Like Being Around
That Kind Of Love.

Thank You, Miss Horne.

I Think We Should
Be Going Now.

Oh, Do You
Have To?

Yes, Thank You
Very Much.

Good-Bye,
Miss Horne.

Good-Bye.

Good-Bye, Mr. Huxtable.

Good-Bye, Miss Horne.

♪ In This World ♪

♪ Of Overrated Pleasures ♪

♪Of La-Dee Boody
Treasures ♪

You Had A Good Time,
Didn't You?

Ooh, That Was The Best.

I'm Telling You.

And What That Woman Did
With That Club Was Fantastic.

Isn't She Something Else?

To Think She Started Singing
In "The Cotton Club" At .

I'm Talking About What She Did
With That Hotel.

It's Beautiful.

I Heard Her Father Left Her
That Place When He Died.

Know What I Want
For My Birthday Next Year?

I Want You To Buy Me A Hotel.

Cliff?

What?

Shut Up.

What Are You
Doing Up?

Working.

At This Hour?

After Tonight, I Took
Another Look At My Song

And Decided To Change It
Just A Little.

You Want To Walk With
Somebody While You're Alone?

Let's Hear It.

Okay, Let Me
Get The Music.

(Piano Music)

"My Mother And My Father
Are My Best Friends.

"When I'm All Alone,
I Don't Have To Be.

"It's Because Of Me
That I'm All Alone, You See.

"Their Love Is Real.

"Wisdom...

"Their Love Is All Mine.

"I Have Faith In Them
All The Time.

"The Best Living Friends

"The Best Living Lovers

"Till The End.

"Their Love Is Real.

"Never Have They Lied To Me,
Never Connived Me

"Or Talked Behind My Back.

"Never Have They Cheated Me.

Their Love Is Real,
Their Love Is Real."

Oh, Denise,
That's Beautiful.

Thank You.