02x10 - Lay Lay's Line Line Dance Dance

[bunniefuu]

Just a little bit more. Perfect.

Voilà!

[gasps] Lay Lay...

I'm gorgeous!

Girl, you look like somebody's about
to huff and puff and blow your house down.

I can't wait for the Clan of Ky-Res
video game simulation.

I'm gonna be the cutest Pork-Orc there.

Yeah, and you are sure this is how
you want to meet Dylan's cousin, Rebecca?

Looking like Shrek.

She will appreciate
my commitment to character.

Rebecca's dressing up
for the simulation too.

So she's coming all the way from Atlanta,

and this is how y'all want
to spend y'all day?

I don't get y'all's obsession
with that game.

But, hey, y'all do y'all, girl.

It's gonna be fun.

Rebecca and I will meet
the creator of it all, Ky-Res.

Imagine if your favorite
video game came to life

and you could play inside it.

No, I just got out the phone.

I'm not trying to get lost
in no more devices.

-[doorbell dings]
-[gasps] Oh, that must be her.

Greetings!

It is I, Letesi, an elf warrior
from the village of Taga.

Welcome, Letesi.

I am Alu from the village of Chugai,

chieftess of the mighty Pork-Orc clan.

And I'm Lay Lay from Houston,

slayer of looks
and best rapper in Cleveland.

Hey, Lay Lay. Good to see you again.

It's good to see you, too, Rebecca,

especially without
your bean-head cousin, Dylan.

What?

Excuse you?

Dylan, you're here?

Yes, I am, and for the record,
I am not a bean head.

This thing's a walnut.

And you should talk, peanut-head.

Sorry, guys.

He jumped in the car
before my parents could drive away.

♪ I'm Sadie's affirmation app ♪

♪ And so no matter what happens,
I got her back ♪

♪ 'Cause see,
my homey Sadie wished on a star ♪

♪ She said, "I wish you were real,"
now I'm as real as you are ♪

-♪ And now, who's coming out the app? ♪
-♪ That Girl Lay Lay ♪

-♪ Whose avatar power is to freeze? ♪
-♪ That Girl Lay Lay ♪

♪ All day, all day, it's your girl ♪

♪ That girl, that girl, that girl ♪

♪ That Girl Lay Lay ♪

Marky and Scoot's sleepover went well.

I know because I didn't sleep at all.

Hey, you notice when Marky's with Scoot,
he's less, "hedge my investments"

and more, "how many rocks fit in my shoe"?

Yeah, it's nice to see him
be a typical kid, huh?

Die, you worthless bottom-feeding scum!

-[Scoot groans]
-Yeah, it's nice.

[laughs]

You boys wanna lay
your swords down and join us?

What's up, Mom? You sleep well?

Wow. Blueberries inside of pancakes?

You guys are geniuses!

Well, we didn't invent
blueberry pancakes, Scoot,

-but we love your enthusiasm.
-[laughs]

Scoot, this is why we need you around.

The house is twice as fun with you in it.

Yep, our house is your house, Scoot.

Sweet.

I'll stick around then.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I'm going upstairs to take a bath.

Is he really taking a bath in our house?

And it's not even Wednesday.

You guys really made him feel at home.

♪ ♪

Aw, what a sweet little pudge of pork.

Oh, I was talking about Bacon,
but you're cute too.

It's so cool hanging out
with you in person, Rebecca.

We've kicked so much
wizard butt together online,

but today, we get to do it side-by-side.

I know, right?

The only thing that'll
make this day cooler

is when Ky-Res awards us
that golden game controller.

And then everybody in the game
will know the names Letesi and Alu.

Can I get a Letesi-Alu handshake?

[both laugh]

Hey.

-[both trilling]
-[laughter]

[Lay Lay laughs] Incoming!

Whee!

Whoa!

I gotta say,

you've upgraded
since the last time I've been here.

Dylan is up to something.

He's obviously here to ruin
our perfectly planned day

with his shenanigans.

As chieftess of the mighty Orc clan,
I strictly forbid shenanigans.

Okay, Dylan, fess up.
Why are you really here?

I couldn't pass up a chance
to visit my buddies in Cleveland

and have some fun.

Nobody comes to Cleveland for fun!

What about that super fun
video game simulation you're here for?

You two crazy creatures
don't wanna be late for that.

Lay Lay, no shenanigans.

Me? What'd I do?

I know he's up to something.

Whatever thing you're cooking,
keep it away from what we got cooking.

-Why would I be up to...
-Keep it away!

Okay, I'm up to shenanigans!

No. Sadie said no.

But it's a great idea.

-♪ La, la, la, la ♪
-See, I just...

Can't hear you!

Will you just hear me out?

♪ La, la, la, la, la,
la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

Dang it, I thought you were
gonna slide down after me.

Just listen.

My plan involves music and fame.

Say less. What's the move?

-I've got a song you'll fit perfect on.
-Oh, okay.

If all you needed was a feature
from the GOAT, just say that.

Step one, we'll add
your vocals to my track.

Then we'll sneak it
to the Clan of Ky-Res simulation.

Then we'll play the music for the creator.

-Then she'll put it on her game.
-Hmm.

Having our song
on a video game would be major.

That's what I'm talking about.
So you ready to lay down some vocals?

Is Mariah Carey ready for Christmas?

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

This is so cool!

I can't believe we're literally inside
Clan of Ky-Res.

Don't you wish we could just live in here?

[both sigh]

An elf and a Pork-Orc can dream.

Back to reality.
We gotta win that Golden Controller.

[Sir Fixalot laughs]

Win, you say? [laughs]

It is not you who will be
winning the Golden Controller.

It is I, Sir Fixalot.

I know who you are.

You tried to fix my brother's phone.

"Tried"? How dare thee.

Oh, good.
I was worried we'd be the weird fans.

[both laugh]

What up, players?

[cheers and applause]

You know who I am:

Ky-Res, creator of the Kyra-verse.

Welcome to my world.

Why you got me in this
Marge Simpson wig, Dylan?

So Rebecca and Sadie won't recognize us.

This is perfect nerd camouflage.

This plan better work.

It will, Lay Lay. Now, play along.

Well, do my eyes deceive me,

or do I see the trolls
of the Hakenva clan?

I think that's us.

I am honored to meet the Swedish gamers,

Gunter and Gwenn.

[with bad Swedish accent] Um, yeah! Hello.

[with accent] Yes, we are them.

[Sir Fixalot laughs]

Well...oh, I hear them now.
My fans demand me.

[laughs] Adjö.

Hey.
[in normal accent] Whoo. That was close.

Now, let's find Ky-Res, play her our song,

and get out before we catch nerd.

[laughs]

Yeah, 'cause I am not trying
to get caught by Sadie.

You do not want to see the face she makes
when she is disappointed.

[Dylan laughs]

I know that voice.

You guys are here?

I am so disappointed.

See? That's the face.

♪ ♪

Is that the good stuff I smell?

-Boxed mac 'n' cheese?
-[laughs]

It sure... is.

Mmm-mmm-mmm.

I love the smell of powdered cheese
in the afternoon.

Marky, may I have a word
with you in the living room?

Well, it's not like I'm eating.

Bryce, Scoot's still here,

and he's eating all your son's food.

What?

It's way past sleepover-go-home time.

I thought he left hours ago.

I guess he's been
in the bath the whole time.

Then why is he still dirty?

It's one of the many mysteries
that Scoot brings to the table.

Well, he needs to go home,
and you need to be the one to tell him.

But I don't know how.

Son, here's what you gotta do.

Sit him down, look him square in the eye,
and then gently say...

"You gotta bounce, Scoot!"

What your mama said.

Ahh.

Hey, boss and boss' parents.

Check it out. I got elbow mac.

-You got this, baby.
-Tell him like it is.

[sighs]

-Scoot, can you sit down?
-Not now.

We gotta let bugs lick
the cheese off my elbow.

Come on!

I mean, I do kinda wanna see that.

Sweet James Brown,
that boy is never leaving!

♪ ♪

Why didn't you tell us

that you secretly love Clan of Ky-Res?

Yup. You got us. We love this nerd stuff.

Oh, come on, Sadie. They're not fans.

This is shenanigans for sure.

-What? Us? Shenanigans?
-Yeah.

Really?
What's your favorite part of the game?

[Lay Lay scoffs]

The Hogwarts.

-And Chewbacca.
-Okay!

[together] Shenanigans.

All right, you got us.

We came here to play our song for Ky-Res.

We thought if she heard it,
she might put it on the game.

Well, since you guys are here,

maybe we can help each other out
by working together.

Really? You would help us?

We would help each other.
It's called teamwork.

[laughs]

Teamwork is for commoners.

This knight needs no steed.

So steer clear, peasants.

[grunting]

Players, get ready to game.

You must avoid being hit by Orc'ean eggs

in order to reach the stone
and pull out the sword.

[all] Whoa!

The first one to retrieve the sword

will be crowned my champion.

Some of you look like you haven't been out

of your parents' basements in years,
so good luck!

Um, guys, Ky-Res just said

the first one to pull the sword.

That's right.

This is a single-player game.

Also, I can hear you.

Leaping lightsabers,
it's every orc for themselves.

Huzzah! [laughs]

A battle royale with no alliances.

Well, there shall be only one champion,

and it shall be I, Sir Fixalot. [laughs]

Ow, ow, ow!

Oh, it always catches some of my hair!

[upbeat music]

Don't worry, Lay Lay.

After I meet Ky-Res
and become rich and famous,

I'll bring you on tour as my opener.

Aw, that's nice, Dylan,

but I would feel so bad if people left
after I k*lled it,

and you came onstage to an empty house.

Good luck, Letesi.

When I win the Golden Controller,

I might let you hold it for ten seconds.

[laughs] Good luck, Alu.

When I win,
I'll let you hold it for eight.

Okay.

Players, once you are hit
by an Orc'ean egg,

you are eliminated.

Ready. Get set. Go!

[trumpet blares]

[all clamoring]

This is chaos, and I love it!

[Lay Lay] Whoa!

[buzzer blares]

♪ ♪

What the heck. I'm going for the sword.

Tell my story! [screams]

Hey, why'd you freeze time, Lay Lay?

I was in a squat-walk groove.

I thought this was gonna be
nerdy make-believe,

not play tennis against Serena Williams.

If you can't hang with the big dogs,
stay on the porch.

Now, you know I can hang
with the big dogs,

but it looks like Dylan can't.

Should I move him a little and save him?

You could,

but it would be funnier if you don't.

The chieftess has spoken.

-[snaps]
-[buzzer blares]

Ow!

Ah, shucks, Dylan!

Looks like you're a loser.

But don't worry,
'cause I'm gonna win for the both...

-[buzzer blares]
-Ow!

Still one better than you.

♪ ♪

[laughs] He lives in a pineapple.

Oh, Scoot, you're still here.

Mr. Alexander. Ditto.

No, not ditto.

Marky!

Why are you watching
Zombie Gut Splash on the tablet

when the TV is right there?

Because Scoot grabbed the remote first.

It's called dibs.

No, it's called "this ain't your house"!

I love it here.

You guys have a great TV, excellent food,

and the best back scratcher
I've ever used.

My CHOFMA!

♪ ♪

[intense music]

♪ ♪

[buzzer blares]

We're down to three contestants.

Who will be the one

to retrieve the sword from the stone?

Being inside this game
is a lot scarier than playing at home.

And it's definitely harder
as a single player.

Wait.
Who says we have to be single players?

You heard Ky-Res. There's one champion.

Well, I know we're
technically flying solo, but...whoa!

Okay, hold on. I'm coming to you.

[grunting]

You Pork-Orcs sure know how to squat-walk.

I mean, as long as we've got
each other's backs,

one of us can get
the Golden Controller, right?

I've got your back if you've got mine.

Just remember, win or lose,

we both did better than Dylan and Lay Lay.

[both laugh]

Come on. Let's do this.

Alu and Letesi!

-It's go time.
-Right.

♪ ♪

[men's choir singing dramatically]

♪ ♪

[buzzer blares]

Alu, you sacrificed yourself,
so that I could live.

Go, Letesi, finish for your village

and claim the Golden Controller.

[gasps]

♪ ♪

Huzzah! You lose.

Now, I shall claim
what is rightfully mine!

-[cannon fires]
-[groans]

My honor. My worth.

No!

♪ ♪

For Alu!

I am Letesi of the village of Taga.

[triumphant music]

♪ ♪

♪ Who's got a sword?
Letesi's got a sword ♪

[both] ♪ Who's got a sword?
Letesi's got a sword ♪

♪ Who's got a sword?
Letesi's got a sword ♪

♪ Who's got a sword?
Letesi's got a sword ♪

Oh, you missed a spot.

Quit touching my CHOFMA.

Hi, Mrs. Alexander. You look radiant.

Oh, come on, man.

Scoot, I see you don't have your socks.

The puppies needed some fresh air.

Get your feet off my table.

And don't ever put your red socks

in the washing machine
with my white laundry.

Man, now this is
what I call a lucky mistake,

because pink is your color, girlfriend.

[upbeat music]

[cheering]

You battled well, warriors.

Now, I have a surprise for you.

[dramatic music]

[cheers and applause]

It's Ky-Res. She's here.

Let's bring to the stage my champion.

Congratulations, Letesi.

Ky-Res knows my Kyra-verse name.

[laughs]

Get up here, girl,
and get your Golden Controller.

And bring Alu with you.

What?

I don't understand. Rebecca's the winner.

The real challenge today was
to see who would realize

the only way to win
was to work together no matter what.

Seriously?

Zip it, Fixy.

You two are both winners.

[gasps]

[both] Yay!

[cheers and applause]

[sighs]

Ky-Res is right there,
but we can't talk to her.

Says you. We about to pull a Kanye.

Ky-Res, I'm gonna let you finish, girl.

Security. Security. Security.

Ky-Res, will you just hear us out?

Lay Lay and I rap.

And we recorded a song,
and we really wanted you to...

hear it.

Oh, no.

The song was on his phone,
but one of your nerd eggs broke it.

-I could help.
-Oh!

But I won't! [grunts]

I did have a juggler
from the Renaissance Faire booked,

but he canceled.

You're warriors, right?

How about you guys conquer the stage?

Oh, say less. Watch us work, Ky-Ky.

[upbeat music]

Scoot, I'm gonna say this
as nicely as I possibly can.

What are you still doing here?

Yeah, like, don't you have a home?

Where is your mama?

You pose an excellent question,
Mr. Alexander.

I do have a home, right across the street.

My mom really wants me to come back.

She texted me tons of times.

But you guys need me here.

[both] What?

At breakfast, you told me
how much you love having me here.

I'm clearly the Alexander family glue.

[laughs]

You're my best bud,

but you gotta bounce, Scoot!

I get it.

Besides, if I leave now,

I can still catch a ride with Grandma
to Yacht Rock Bingo!

♪ ♪

All right, elves and orcs,

give it up for Lay Lay and Young Dylan.

[cheers and applause]

-♪ Hottest in the game ♪
-♪ Hottest in the game ♪

♪ We some livin' legends ♪

-♪ Hottest in the game ♪
-♪ Hottest in the game ♪

-♪ Hottest in the game ♪
-♪ We did it together ♪

-[Dylan] ♪ Hottest in the game ♪
-♪ Hey ♪

♪ Ain't nothing that could stop me ♪

♪ Make it look like winning is a hobby ♪

♪ So good, everybody wanna copy ♪

♪ Till they realize they are not we ♪

♪ Can't go against the fam,
we too hard, we too fast ♪

♪ That's too bad,
we look good, we shine bright ♪

♪ It's our time,
take a look at the clock ♪

♪ And we still in the number one spot ♪

-♪ Hottest in the game ♪
-[Dylan] ♪ Hottest in the game ♪

-[Lay Lay] ♪ We some livin' legends ♪
-[Dylan] ♪ Hottest in the game ♪

-[Lay Lay] ♪ Hottest in the game ♪
-[Dylan] ♪ Hottest in the game ♪

-[both] ♪ We did it together ♪
-[Lay Lay] ♪ Hottest in the game ♪

[air horn blares]

[cheers and applause]

♪ ♪

I am a big foodie.

My most adventurous go-to meal?

Probably a whole red snapper,

cooked with its head and eyeballs
still on it.

Absolutely, pineapple belongs on pizza.
Don't argue with me.

I add parmesan cheese
and red pepper flakes.

All over with the pineapple, ooh!

o'clock strikes,
and I'm looking for snacks.

Like, food just tastes better
at midnight to me.

And the lighting's better for pictures.
I know what I'm eating tonight.

And that's life with That Girl Lay Lay.