03x12 - Lofty Ambitions

[bunniefuu]

[rock music playing on TV]



Boy.

Thelma and Louise really knew how to live.

Yeah. Till they drove off that cliff.

So, ready for Yahtzee?

Yahtzee? [chuckles]



Liz, don't you get it?

Life is passing us by.

We need adventure.

I need a scorecard.

This is our wake-up call.

It's like a sign telling us to go for the gusto.

Do things we've never done before.

Mmm. Pass the salsa.

Mild or spicy?

Mmm? Mild.

I mean spicy.

That's better.

From now on, we've got to take more risks.

Live on the edge. Break a few rules.

Oops. Forgot to rewind.

[theme song playing]



[vocalization]



♪ Look right down any crowded hall ♪

♪ You'll see there's a beauty standing ♪

♪ Is she really everywhere or a reflection? ♪

♪ One always Calls out to you ♪

♪ The other's shy and quiet ♪

♪ Could there be two different girls ♪

♪ Who look the same at ♪

♪ Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Meet you at Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Meet you at Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Meet you at Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Meet you at Sweet Valley High ♪

Hey, Shred, I'm going down to the stockroom.

-Can you hold down the fort? -I'm all over it, Windsong.

Right on.

We're here about the payphone.

Thanks. But we've already got one.

No, we're here to fix it.

Oh, cool.

It's in there.

Thanks.

Sure.

Can, can I get a burger?

Go for it, dude. Grill's in the back.

All right. Cool.

It's bad. It's really bad.

We got to take it in right away.

Oh. I didn't know it was so serious.

Thanks, you guys.

Don't mention it.

Oh, and tell Winston Mesquite Pete says hi.

Got you, bro.

Later, dudes.

Huh.

What happened to the phone?

-The phone bros took it away. -What?

It wasn't even broken.

Wait. Wait a minute. Wait... a minute.

Was there anything suspicious about these guys?

Not at all. They were totally skegging.

In fact, they said aloha from your bud Mesquite Pete.

I should have known!

Ever since that restaurant opened,

they've been assaulting me

with one childish prank after another

You mean we've been bamboozled?

Precisely. Last week,

they locked a herd of sheep in my stockroom.

Gnarly.

I'm not going to take this anymore.

Battle station, Shred.

This is w*r.

Aye-aye, captain.

What are you doing?

This is a performance art piece from a independent study.

-Huh? -I call it,

"Jessica Being Humiliated at the Moon Beach

by A.J."

Watch closely and you'll see

what a fool you made of yourself.

Well, you're the fool because A.J. is history.

You know what they say, history repeats itself.

Not this time.

I'm never gonna think about A.J. again.

[hard rock music playing loudly]



Good luck.

That's it.

[Lila]

What's that?

[Jessica]

Earplugs.

"These are for the next time I say something stupid.

A.J."

So sweet.

Earrings are sweet.

Earplugs are just... weird.

-Where do you think you're going? -Next door.

It would be rude of me not to thank him for his present.

Now, wouldn't it, Lila?

[knocking on door]



-Hey. -They fit perfectly.

-Thanks. -[boy]

Come on, man.

You're welcome.

Look, now's not a good time.

We're, uh, we're in the middle of rehearsals.

So I'll watch.

Actually, we've, uh, we've got a lot of work to do.

Work? You're in a band.

You wouldn't understand.

I'll explain it to you sometime later.

Yeah, sure.

Much later.

[boy]

Let's go, A.J.

That's right, pounds of your smelliest squid.

Just leave it at the front door.

Later, Giuseppe.

Captain, I've launched the first m*ssile.

What are you talking about?

This afternoon, Mesquite Pete is about to be

up to his armpits in a truckload of stinky squid.

-You're a genius. -Yeah.

And I got a really good deal on it.

-Only $ . -Well done.

Wait. Who's paying for this?

I told them to charge it to the Moon Beach.

What? Look,

we're supposed to cost them money,

not the other way around.

Uh-oh.

I better cancel that shipment of billy goats.

Those dudes cost a fortune.

[sighs]



[Enid]

We take the ship out

to the middle of the ocean,

and then we dive off the ship

and feed the man-eating sharks.

Sounds great.

What?

Well, they said we could watch from the safety cage,

but I told them we didn't need it.

Maybe we should start smaller.

You know, like man-eating goldfish.

That sounds like the old Liz talking.

No. No, I'm with you.

I just really like to finish high school in one piece.

There's got to be something we can do.

Erin's mother almost fainted when she saw her tattoo.

She got grounded for five weeks.

-Isn't that cool? -[Cheryl]

Yeah.

[squealing, giggling]



What should I get, a peace sign or a fish?

Whichever hurts less?

How about butterflies? I bet they don't hurt.

You wanna bet?

See that?

That hurt more than the time I tried to jump Snake Canyon

on my motorcycle.

Did you know that there's cactus

down at the bottom of that canyon?

All right, who's first?

[Liz and Enid]

He is.

-[door creaks open]

-Finally.

A customer.

You guys open?

Yeah, of course we're open.

Just don't have any customers.

They're probably down at Mesquite Pete's.

They got this new squid burger.

It's incredible. Lines halfway around the block.

Too bad I'm allergic, huh?

[grunts, groans]



Ow!

"Thanks for the squid.

Mesquite Pete's."

You... wouldn't... understand.

I can't believe you're letting A.J. get to you like this.

A.J.? A.J. who?

Why do you put up with that?

It's so not... you.

I know.

I can't explain it either.

But A.J. is... different.

Oh, please. Snap out of it.

You're acting like a giddy teenager with a crush.

I am a giddy teenager with a crush.

I told you, musicians are trouble.

You also told me your hair was naturally red.

[knock at door]



-What do you want? -Band's taking a break.

You know, I thought maybe we could do something.

I can't. I'm busy.

-Really? -Look...

I'm not about to drop everything

and come running because you have five minutes.

Jessica...

I'm not your half-time entertainment.

[door closes]



That's more like it.

You stood up to him.

I did, didn't I?

You didn't let him play any games.

-Yeah. -You put him in his place.

-Yeah. -Aren't you proud of yourself?

Yeah.

No.

It's different this time, Lila.

What if he's the one?

-Now this is on the edge. -Yeah.

And the best part is we're going to a wild party.

It doesn't say anything about wild.

Come on. We got the invitation at a tattoo parlor.

It's got to be wild.

"Downtown. Warehouse. Bring your own bail money."

We got us a party, Thelma.

I don't know, Enid. This party is in a bad neighborhood.

And it doesn't start until : .

Which is a perfect time for a party to start.

I can't wait to show off our new tattoos.

We are the baddest.

Um, Enid.

Your tattoo's rubbing off.

[sighs]

Oh, darn.

It's not funny.

[Winston]

Come on, Shred, push harder.

Push.

We got to get his inside before Mesquite Pete

finds out we stole it.

Can't... breathe, Win-bro.

[grunts]



Whoa. That was one hairy moment.

I think I saw my life flash before my eyes.

I've had a good life.

What now?

Well, we can't just leave her here.

-Why not? -Well, for one thing,

it makes it really hard on the customers to come in

if there's a giant Mesquite Pete's waitress

blocking the door.

-Oh, yeah. -Wait.

I got it.

[Shred]

Got what, dude?

This looks like a job for Winston Egbert, MD.

Brilliant surgeon to the stars.

This is for the Moon Beach.

Freedom!

[air whooshing]



[squeaky voice]

Vengeance is mine.

[laughing]



[squeaky voice]

No one messes with...

[both]

The Moon Beach.

Hello, Egbert.

Mesquite Pete!

[gulps]



[tapping on window]



I don't believe this.

Ugh!

What are you doing here?

Come on. We're going to a party.

Are you crazy?

It's the middle of the night.

So what?

Let me get this straight.

First you blow me off at the Moon Beach.

Then you act like you don't even know me at rehearsal.

Now you bring me flowers, and everything's supposed to be okay?

Look, I'm sorry.

You just came by at a bad time.

Well, this is a bad time for me.

Okay.

We'll compromise.

I get to take you to this party,

and you get to stay mad at me.

Come on.

The party's gonna rage.

Okay, I'll go change.

But I'm still mad at you.

Yes!

[tapping on window]



Enid.

Enid, I left the back door unlocked, remember?

Unlocked doors are too easy.

I wanted a challenge.

[exhales]

I don't know about this party.

If my parents find out, they'll--

Come on, Thelma.

[Enid]

Woo-hoo.

Look what you've done to my gal.

Dude, she's just a balloon.

What?

This has gone too far.

A joke here, a joke there,

all of a sudden, it's come to this.

I didn't mean to k*ll her. It was an accident.

Accident?

Don't hurt me.

Please.

There's been enough unrest between our two burger joints.

Today I'm calling a truce

To show you that I'm good for my word...

[snaps fingers]

I'm returning your payphone.

Boys,

get little Rose patched up.

Okay, boss.

I can't bear to see her like this.

Truce?

Truce.

-Aah! -[Winston grunting]



Forgiveness rules.

-[Enid]

Chinese fire drill. -Here?

[Enid]

Come on, live it up!

Time to get wild.

[Liz]

This is crazy.

Oh, no, we've got to stop it.

-What are you doing? It's getting away! -I know.

-It's more fun like this. -[tires screeching]



-Now we have to run after it. -[horns honking]



-[crashing]

-[laughing]



Wow!

This is incredible.

Hey. Thanks for coming.

Wait. I've seen this before.

It's performance art.

See, the egg represents love,

and the blender represents...

bad stuff.

So when you mix it all together,

it combines the love with the bad stuff.

So, it still comes out okay.

You are an amazing performance artist.

Lady, I'm a bartender.

Mango egg whip?

[both giggling]



I've never been to a party like this before.

-I'm having such a good time. -Me too.

See what happens when you fit me into your schedule.

Look, um...

I know it seems like I've been blowing you off, but, uh...

I've got to explain something to you.

I've been under a lot of pressure with the band.

We only have a year to make it.

I don't have a lot of time left.

It's just my old man wants me to go

into family business like his father did.

So I convinced him to give me a year.

Oh. What's the business?

Oh, you, uh,

y-you ever heard of, uh, Morgan's Chowder House?

Isn't that the place where they dress up like pirates

-and sing the daily special? -Yeah.

Wow.

You really are under a lot of pressure.

See, that's why I have to totally focus on my music...

as much as I'd like to focus on you.

So, what are you saying?

I'm saying I don't think I'm the type of guy

you want to get involved with.

My music's always gonna come first.

[boy]

Hey, A.J., we need a guitarist, man.

Come on up here.

You'll be okay?

I'll be fine. Really.

Go ahead.

[laughing]



I have never run so fast in my life.

Guess my step classes finally paid off.

-Don't look at them. -[engine revving]



Hey, don't mess with me, man.

Why don't you two twinkies go back

to your little house on the prairie.

-What are you doing? -[laughing]



Hey, this road ain't big enough for the both of us, pal.

-Oh, yeah? -Yeah.

Let's race.

Or are you chicken?

-Eat... my... dirt! -[tires squealing]



-[men laughing]

-Hey, come back here!

-[Liz]

Enid. -Wimps!

[Liz]

Enid!

Are you crazy?

[people cheering, applauding]



-[A.J.]

Thanks, man. -Good job.

-It was amazing. -Thanks.

You're so talented.

You can't waste your life serving chowder.

Believe me, I know.

[slow romantic rock playing]



Wanna dance?

Sure.

So, after everything I've told you about myself,

I'm surprised you're still here.

I'm not going anywhere.

Besides, you drove.

Come on, let's go for a walk.

[electronic dance music playing]



I've never seen anything like it!

Neither have I!

Although it's kinda like my Aunt Fanny's apartment.

Well, before they put her away.

♪ Come on, let's party ♪

-Oh. -Hey.

A fairy. Better than Disneyland.

[boy]

Whoa, check it out.

All right, let's break it up. Party's over.

[Enid]

Since when is it illegal to have a party?

Since all your neighbors are complaining about the noise.

Let's break it up!

Come on, you guys. We can't let them do this!

We've got to fight for our right to party!

-[girl]

Yeah! -[boy]

All right.

Hey, get any of that glitter on my uniform,

I'm running you downtown.

Oh, man, now you're picking on an innocent fairy.

-What's next? -You're trying to cause trouble, young lady?

Double trouble.

You're not breaking up this party without a fight.

Enid, stop it.

Cuff 'em, Earl.

Oh, sir...

We're really just two well-behaved,

responsible girls.

I'm on the honor roll,

and she's on the soccer team.

Liz, what about Thelma and Louise,

living on the edge?

Shut up or we're gonna be living in a cell.

I'll tell you what.

Now, I'm gonna let you off with a warning

if you promise to go home

and behave yourselves.

All right, that's it. You're going downtown.

That's enough, Louise.

-Let's go. -[Enid sighs]



[Enid]

But it was just starting to get good.

Why do we have to go?

[Enid laughing]

That was awesome.

Let's go sh**t bottle rockets off the top of Mercer Tower.

You can do whatever you want, I'm going home.

Come on, it's early.

There's still a lot more adventure

out there just waiting for us.

It will just have to wait. I'm exhausted.

[Enid]

Time for beddy-bye?

Enid, I'll never forget tonight.

But this isn't something we can do all the time.

I mean, if we did, it wouldn't be as exciting, right?

-[snoring]

-Enid?

[sighs]



Do you ever have one of those nights

you know you'll never forget

as long as you live?

-Yeah. -I went to this amazing party tonight.

I met all these cool people.

Really?

Then A.J. sang,

and it just turned into this magical evening.

Uh-huh.

Wish you could have been there.

Then again, it's not really your scene.

-Yeah, you're probably right. -So what about you?

Did you b*at Enid in Yahtzee again?

Not exactly.

Good night.

[Jessica]

Is that glitter?

Maybe.

And then Mesquite Pete pulled out his Kn*fe,

and I said, "I can take all five of you

with my bare hands."

Hey, can you get the door for me?

Sure, bro.

[boy]

Why are they taking the milkshake machine?

-Thanks, man. -[Winston]

Well, that just goes

to show you what happens

when you mess with Winston Egbert.

Wow.

[girls laughing]



♪ Look right down any crowded hall ♪

♪ You'll see there's a beauty standing ♪

♪ Is she really everywhere or a reflection? ♪

♪ Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Meet you at Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Sweet Valley Sweet Valley High ♪

♪ Meet you at Sweet Valley High ♪