04x07 - Autumn Gifts

[bunniefuu]

Hey!

Hey, Stop That!

What?

Haven't You Ever Heard
Of A Glass?

I'm In A Hurry.

I'm Going To Mrs. Hickson's
To Play "Go Fish."

You Guys Drink Out Of
This Bottle All The Time.

Look At This Stuff--
Bread Crumbs Floating Around...

There's Even
A Corn Flake.

What Is This?

That's Not Mine.

Vanessa Had The Corn Flakes
This Morning.

If You Go To
Mrs. Hickson's House

I Don't Want Her
Calling And Saying:

"You Are Bringing Up
A Barbarian.

"She's Drinking Milk
Out Of The Carton

And Eating With Her Toes."

I Don't Use My Toes.

You Don't Drink Out Of
The Bottle, Either.

All Right?

Okay.

You Should Yell At Vanessa.

She Borrows Your Toothbrush.

Thank You For Squealing.

Do You Have
Any Fours?

No.

Go Fish.

Contessa,
Would You Like More Tea?

A Spot, Duchess.

This Reminds Me Of
The Afternoon I Spent

With The Duke And Duchess
Of Windsor

Playing Croquet On The East Lawn
Of Their Estate.

Ah, Yes...
Such A Lovely Lawn.

That It Is.

Not As Lovely As The King
And Queen Of Jupiter's Lawn.

But Nicer Than The Lawn Of
The Emperor And Empress Of Mars.

Duchess, You Naughty Thing.

But Don't Stop.

I Love It.

Don't We All?

Do You Have Any Sevens?

It's My Turn.

I Was Just Checking To See
That You Were Paying Attention.

( Phone Ringing )

Excuse Me.

Windsor Palace.

The Duchess Speaking.

Hello, Robbie.

It's My Son, Prince Robbie.

I'm Just
Fine--

Having Tea With The Contessa.

Yes.

Yes, I Will.

I Said, "Yes, I Will."

Get Off My Case, Robbie.

I Promise To Take My Pill
If You'll Stop Acting Like One.

What About You?

Are You Flossing?

Well, It's Very Important
After .

Good-Bye.

How's The Prince?

He Is A Royal Pain.

He's Always Asking
If I Take My Medicine.

Why Don't You Take It?

Rudy, You Take Medicine
When You're Sick.

I'm Not Sick.

Now, Do You Have Any Sevens?

Mrs. Hickson, It's My Turn.

Oh.

Yes.

I Was Trying To Psych You Out.

Do You Have Any Threes?

Oh, Contessa,
You Are k*lling Me.

I Haven't Played
With Such A Card Shark

Since I Played King Henry Viii.

I Was Married To Him

You Know.

Long Live The King.

Long Live The King.

( Television Audio )
♪ Open The Door, Richard. ♪

♪ Open The Door
And Let Me In... ♪

As Per Clair's Orders:

Broccoli, Rice Cakes,
Distilled Water--

A No-Salt Snack.

Hello.

Hello.

How You Doing?

Great.

What's That?

Sleeping Bags.

You Didn't Pay Your Rent?

Daddy, Of Course We Did.

How's
Everything?

Fine.

I Think We Made
The Right Career Choice.

We've Had
A Terrific Month

The Only Things That Aren't
Moving Are These Sleeping Bags.

You're Not Moving Them Here.

No, We're Not.

We're Making You Part Of
A Promotional Campaign.

Quotes From People
Who Have Used The Bags

Will Get Others To Buy Them.

We'll Sleep
In The Back Yard Tonight.

Anyone Who Joins Us
Gives Us Their Quote.

Who's Joining Us?

Dad, You're
The Guest Here.

Thanks, Son

But Sleeping Bags Are Filled
With Goose Feathers.

I'm Allergic To Them.

Grandpa, These Are Made
With Manmade Fibers.

I'm Allergic To Them, Too.

Dad?

I'm Allergic To Bears.

In The Yard?

You Sleep Face Up In Those?

Yes.

I'm Allergic To Pigeons, Also.

We Hit You With This
Too Suddenly.

You'll Feel Differently
After You've Thought About It.

We'll Put The Bags
In The Back.

Help Yourself.

I Admire Their
Initiative, Cliff.

I Think They'll
Make A Go Of It

With This
Wilderness Store.

If They Don't, They're Not
Sleeping In My Back Yard.

Grandpa!

There's My Girl!

Where Did You Get
That Lovely Hat?

From Mrs. Hickson.

Who Is Mrs. Hickson?

She's My Friend
Down The Street.

Did You Have Fun?

Yes, She's Funny
When We Play Cards.

She Gets Sleepy,
And Then She Cheats.

She Cheats?

She Says It's Her Turn
When It's Mine.

She's Doing That Again?

Yes.

How's She Feeling?

She Says She's Fine.

That's Why She Stopped
Taking Her Medicine.

Guess Who's Here.

Who?

Sondra And Elvin.

They're In
The Back Yard.

Sondra! Elvin!

No Matter
What

You Are Not Sleeping
In The Back Yard Tonight.

Come On.

You And I Will Walk Over
And See Mrs. Hickson.

She's Done This Before.

I Think You And I

Can Help Her
Take Her Medicine.

I've Seen This Before
With Friends.

If They Have Medicine To Take,
They Resent It.

They Feel
It Controls Their Lives

So They Stop Taking It.

When You Get Older,
Things Like That Happen.

I Saw You
Take That Rib.

( Doorbell )

Well, Dr. Huxtable.

How Are You,
Mrs. Hickson?

Who Is This Handsome Man
With You?

This Is My Younger Brother,
Russell Huxtable.

I'm His Father.

It's A Pleasure
Meeting You.

You Don't Know That Yet.

Come In, And You'll Find Out.

Thank You.

Rudy's Always Talking About
How Good A Time She Has

Whenever She's Here.

Did You Like Her New Hat?

It's Beautiful.

You Gave It To Her?

No, I Sold It To Her.

You Sold It To Her?

She Said Her Father
Was Good For The Money.

You Owe Me $ .

She Has
A Sense Of Humor.

I Am Serious.

Cough It Up.

My Father
Has The Money.

Why Don't You Both Sit Down.

Thank You.

May I Get You
Something To Drink?

No, Thanks.

No, We Just Had
A Wonderful Meal...

I Think.

Oh.

I Couldn't Help But Notice
This Medicine You Have Here.

Is That Medicine Bottle
The Reason You Dropped By?

No.

What's Inside The Bottle
That You're Not Taking

Is The Reason I'm Here Today.

I'm Not Sure
That's Your Business

But If You Like That Bottle,
Take It Home.

I Don't Need It.

Dr. Davidson Would Not
Write This Prescription

Unless He Felt

You Needed It.

If You Don't Take Your Medicine

Then You'll Have
Some Drowsiness...

And Memory Loss.

After Awhile, You Could
Slip Into A Diabetic Coma.

I Don't Intend To
Take Medicine Every Day

For The Rest Of My Life.

I Feel Fine.

You Are Welcome To Stay And Talk
About World Affairs Or Football.

If The Topic
Is Medicine

Go Home And Discuss It.

Okay, We Can Discuss
World Affairs.

Fine.

Did You Know

That The Emperor Of Ethiopia
Is Not Taking His Medicine?

I Heard That, Too

And It's A Shame,
Because He's A Fine Man.

You Two Troublemakers
Won't Be Satisfied

Unless I Take
One Of Those Pills.

Absolutely.

All Right, You Win.

I'll Take A Pill.

There You Are.

All Right.

I'll Pour You
Some Water.

There You Go.

Thank You.

Wonderful.

Now...

I'd Like To Take
My Afternoon Nap.

So You're
Putting Us Out.

That's Right.

No Hard Feelings?

None At All.

I Hope
You'll Come Again...

Yes, We Will.

...Not Often, But Again.

Bye-Bye.

Hi, Daddy.

Guess What?

What?

I Got Mrs. Hickson
To Take Her Medicine.

You Saw Her Take It?

Yes, I Did.

Did You Check

Under Her
Tongue?

No, Why?

She Hides
The Pill There

When She Doesn't Want
To Swallow It.

Really?

Yeah, I Saw Her Do That
When Her Son Was There.

Bet She Faked You Out.

You Should Call Her Son
And Tell Him About This.

First, I Want To Find Out
If She Took The Medication.

If She Didn't

Then She's Definitely
Thrown Down The Gauntlet

And I Accept The Challenge.

Okay, See You Later.

Bye-Bye.

Hey, Vanessa.

I Didn't Know
You Were Home.

Hey, Sis.

What's Up?

Would You Like To
Get Closer To Nature

And Help Sondra And Me?

I'm Not Going To Sleep
In The Back Yard.

Who Told You?

It's A Small House, Sondra.

Word Travels Fast.

That Only Leaves Mom.

She's In The Kitchen.

Let's Go.

Last Chance.

Good Luck, You Guys.

Hi, Mom.

Hi, Mom.

Mom, We Have
A Business Proposition.

I'm Selling A New Line
Of Sleeping Bags.

I Could Sell Hundreds
If I Could Make The Claim:

"This Sleeping Bag
Is So Comfortable

Even My Mother-In-Law
Camped In It."

You'll Enjoy It.

These Sleeping Bags
Are Very Warm And Comfortable.

Can I Think About This?

Sure.

I Don't Know Why We Asked You.

I Beg Your Pardon?

It's Not Your Type Of Thing.

You're The Indoor Type.

You Dress Real Beautifully.

Your Hair's
Always In Place.

You Like
Woman Things.

Are You Saying
I'm Too Delicate For This?

Not At All.

I Like Camping.

I Haven't Done It In Awhile,
But I Am

As Hardy As
The Next Person

So You Name
The Time And Place.

: , Our Yard?

You Got It.

I'll Be There

With My Hair Messed Up.

Elvin, You Were
Sensational

The Way You
Turned My Mother Around

By Using Reverse Psychology.

What Do You Mean?

All Those Ridiculous Statements
You Made

About How Women Are Only
Interested In Looking Good.

It Was Brilliant.

Well?

That Woman Is Funny.

She Came To The Door
And She Went:

"What Do You Want?"

I Said, "I Want To Come In."

"What Is It This Time?"

So, I Looked
Around

And In The Trash Is The Pill.

So I Said,
"Is This The Pill?"

"Oh, Listen,
Why Are You Bothering Me?"

I Said, "Now Look,
You're Going To Take This Pill."

So I Got One,
And I Watched Her.

She Put It In Her Mouth,
Drank The Water.

She Says, "Now What?

So I Said,
"I Want You To Say

"'The Rain In Spain
Falls Mainly On Spain.'"

So She Said,
"The Rain In Sp..."

And Her Teeth Fell Out.

How Did You Make Her Take It?

I Told Her, "This Is Important."

"If You Take It, You Live.

If You Don't, You Die."

You're Very Good.

Thank You.

Somebody Needs
To Do That To You.

For What?

Salt.

Oh, Lord, Please.

For Five Years

Your Doctor Has Been Telling You
To Lower Your Salt Intake.

You Still Have
Hoagies, Bacon, Chips.

I've Even Seen You
Using A Fork

To Make The Holes In
The Salt Shaker Bigger.

That's Because
The Holes Were Clogged.

Didn't You Tell Me
That Your Greatest Fear In Life

Is That One Day, You'll Be
Walking Down The Street

And Pass Out

Only To Awaken And Find
An Unattractive Person

Breathing Foul Air
Into Your Mouth?

Mrs. Hickson
Is As Stubborn
As You Are.

You Got Her To Take That Pill
One Time.

But What Is Your Guarantee That
She'll Continue To Take Them?

Because She Said So.

We'll Have To Do More.

Okay.

While You're Thinking

I'll Fix Myself
A Little Snack.

Hello?

I'm Just Going To Have
A Little Bit Of...

I Won't Fix
Anything Salty.

I Was Going To Have

A Glass Of Distilled Water
And A Bowl Of Air.

Are You Sure The Only Reason
I Was Invited Over Here

Is For Dinner?

Maybe.

Your Family Has Something
Up Its Collective Sleeve.

Maybe.

What Is It?

Come On.

The Contessa Would Tell Me.

Sorry, But The Contessa
Went To Jupiter.

Hello, Mrs. Hickson.

Oh, The Policeman.

We're So Glad
You Could Come Over.

I'm Glad, Too, So Far.

We Heard You Took
Your Medicine Today

So We Thought We'd Celebrate.

Well, How Nice.

That's It?

We Hope We Can Do This
Every Day.

You Have My Word.

Good, Then You Won't
Mind Signing This.

What Is It?

A Contract Saying You'll Let
Rudy Come Over Every Morning

And Watch You
Take Your Medicine.

If You Brought Me Here
To Sign Something

You Have Wasted Good Paper.

My Son And His Family
Care About You.

They Only Want A Promise.

Yeah, Can't I Come Over
In The Morning?

You May Come Over
Any Morning You Want

But I Am Not
Signing Anything.

If I Feel Like Doing Something,
I Do It.

If I Don't Feel Like It,
I Don't.

Clair:
You're Right.

You're The One
Who Should Make This Decision.

We Shouldn't Talk About This
Any Further.

Absolutely.

Okay, I'm Just Going
To Get A Little Snack.

Going To Get Myself
Something To Eat.

I'm Going To Have Myself
A Little Snack.

I'll Be All Right.

You're Not Supposed
To Eat Salty Foods.

But I Feel Fine, Dear.

I Feel Wonderful.

It's Been A Long Time
Since I Had One Of These Boys.

I'll Tear This Up,
Put On A Little Salt.

It Won't Hurt
Because I Feel Fine.

Mmm...

Boy, It's Been
A Long Time.

Mmm.

Oh, My Goodness,
My Son.

We've Got
To Help Him.

My Poor Daddy.

Just Leave Him Alone.

I Told Him
Not To Eat That Salt.

Oh, Now, Wait A Minute.

Vanessa:
I Am Not Brushing My Teeth.

Sondra:
But Aren't You Worried

That Your Teeth And Gums
Won't Stay Healthy?

No Dentist
Will Tell Me

I Have To Brush My Teeth
For The Rest Of My Life.

Vanessa, You Haven't
Brushed Them In A Month.

Hey, My Teeth,
My Decision.

I Am Doing Just Fine
Without Brushing.

Hello.

That Was Just Wonderful.

Do I Get To See
Another One Now?

Hey, Everybody.

I Knew It.

What Happened To Dad?

Salt.

Salt?

A Minute Ago, He Felt Fine.

Now You're The Man Of The House.

Oh, Great.

Well, I'm Going Out.

Theo, Aren't You
Staying For Dinner?

I Ate Some Food
Three Days Ago.

You Have To Eat Every Day
To Stay Healthy.

Mom, I Eat
When I Want To Eat.

Don't Tell Me
I Have To Eat Every Day.

I'm The Man
Of The House.

I Don't Need Food.

I Feel Fine.

Whoa!

Okay, I'll Sign.

I Must Say You People
Are Persistent.

You're Nuts, But
You Are Persistent.

You Sign Up At The Top, And
Rudy Will Sign On The Bottom.

All Right.

Oh!

I Can Play, Too, You Know.

Ahh.

Fresh Air.

We Really Appreciate
You Helping Us Out.

Oh, It's Our Pleasure.

Elvin:
I Think This Was
A Good Compromise.

With The Windows Open, It's
Almost Like Sleeping Outdoors.

We'll Be In
The Back Yard.

See You In The Morning.

Good Night.

Thanks.

Good Night.

Good Night.

Cliff?

Hmm?

I Guess Kissing You
Is Out Of The Question.

I Guess Doing A Whole Lot Of
Things Is Out Of The Question.

It Is Starting
To Get Cold In This Room.

My Nose Is Beginning
To Feel Numb.

I Have To Go To The Bathroom.

Cliff, Why Didn't You
Take Care Of That

Before They Zipped You Up?

I Didn't Have To Go
Before They Zipped Me Up.

You Drank A Lot
Of Water Tonight.

If You'd Let Me Eat Salt

The Salt Would Have
Soaked It Up.

You'll Have To Wait
Till The Morning.

Well, I'm Going To The Bathroom.

The Zipper Is Stuck.

The Zipper's...

Unzip This,
Will You, Please?

Hurry Up, Dear, Please.

No, I'm Not Kidding.

Come On.

Quit Fooling Around.

My Zipper's Stuck, Too.

Your Zipper Is Not Stuck.

Don't Fool With Me Now.

I Swear It's Stuck.

Come On,
Unzip This.

My Zipper's Stuck, Cliff.