08x06 - It's Apparent to Everyone

Episode transcripts for the TV series, "The Cosby Show". Aired: September 20, 1984 – April 30, 1992.*
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Series follows the Huxtable family, an African-American upper middle class family, living in a brownstone in Brooklyn Heights, New York.
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08x06 - It's Apparent to Everyone

Post by bunniefuu »

(Trumpeting)

Get Down.

Get Down, I Said.

Go On And Fall
Off The Cliff.

(Trumpeting)

You'll Have To Be Quiet,
You Know.

You're The One That Fell Off.

It Wasn't My Fault.

If You Stay On The Table,
You Won't Get Hurt.

You Understand Me?

(Trumpeting)

All Right.

I Want You To Keep An Eye
On My Sandwich.

Don't Let Anybody Take It.

You Understand
What I'm Saying?

You're Going To Fall Off Again.

Cliff:
Lower It Down, Roy.

We'll Be Gone All Day
At The Street Fair.

Don't Worry About Us.

Okay.

Now, You Have
A Good Time.

All Right.

Look, Do Me A Favor.

Did You See The Twins Anywhere?

Why Don't You Take Them
With You?

What Kind Of Grandfather
Are You?

I'm A Desperate One.

Would You Take Just One?

Quit Whining, Grandpa.

You're Just A Rookie.

Thanks A Lot, Dad.

I Appreciate It.

A Okay, You Two, Have Fun.

(Trumpeting)

Give Me This Thing!

You Are So Silly.

Wait. No.

I Am Taking These Things
Out Of Here.

No, Don't Take The Truck!

Please.
Don't Take The Truck.

Please Don't
Take The Truck.

See, The Truck
Doesn't Make Any Noise.

I Swear.

It Doesn't Make Any Noise.

This Is From
When I Was A Boy.

(Imitating A Horn)

You Know?

Let A Grown Man
Have His Childhood.

All Right, Roy.

(Imitating Truck Exhaust)

I Think She's Gone.

Open It Up.

Okay.

Close It Up, Boys.

I Worry About You Sometimes.

All Right, Boys.

I Hope It Isn't
Too Far Back There.

Now, This Is What
We've Been Looking For.

Clean Dishes, Mom.

Thank You, Sondra.

No, No. Thank You.

You And Dad
Have Been Great

Putting Up With Us
For A Month.

We're Family.

Have You Heard Anything

From The Real Estate
Company?

We Should Hear Any Minute.

Elvin's Stopping There
On His Way Home.

We Are So Excited About Moving.

Ah...

Yes.

And We Are Happy
For You.

Now That The Benedettis
Have Cancelled The Divorce

They'll Be Moving Out Any Day.

And You'll Be Moving In.

(Children Shouting)

Mom, Are They
Bothering You?

Aren't They Bothering You?

Yes, But Winnie And Nelson
Have This Natural Exuberance

That Elvin And I Encourage.

Aha.

Hey, Kids

Come Here, Come Here,
Come Here... Oh!

Oh, Come Now.

Look, I Want You
To Settle Down, Okay?

You're Bothering Grandma.

She's Sensitive.

You're Not Going
To Kick Us Out, Are You?

Of Course Not.

Whatever Gave You That Idea?

Okay, Winnie And Nelson, Uh...

Skedaddle.

Come On.

Okay.

Shh.

Grandma's Sensitive.

Sondra, In The First Place

I Am Not Sensitive

And In The Second Place,
It Is Not "Grandma."

It's "Mother: The Sequel."

Well, Roy

Put This Away
And Save It For Later.

Hey, Dad.

Well, Well,
If It Isn't Dr. Two Shifts.

Yeah.

Man, You Look b*at.

You Would Not Believe
What I've Been Through.

Really?

Actually, You Would.

Thank You.

Ha Ha.

Oh, It Is So Good
To Be Home.

Yes, Indeed.

In Your Home.

No. Listen, Elvin, You've
Been Here Several Weeks Now.

A Whole Month, Dad.

Days.

Days, Man.

Days...

Yeah.

Hours And...

Minutes.

Stop Counting, Man.

Just Relax.

Okay.

Relax.

Thanks.

You're Welcome.

There You Go.

Oh. I Bought This
For You.

I Don't Want Any More Presents.

No. Take It.

It's A Free Sample.

I Bought The Bag.

Okay. Yeah.
Thank You. Cologne.

Oh, This Is Fantastic.

You're Always Thinking Of Me.

It's Fine.

But, Uh...

No More Presents, Man.

That's It.

Okay. I Respect That.

This Is Your Home.

Relax.

Relax.

Okay.

You Know What?

I'm Going To Eat
My Egg Salad.

I Made This Incredible
Egg Salad Last Night.

I'll Go Eat It.

That's What I Need.

Uh...

I Don't Think
That On An Empty Stomach

After Working Two Shifts

That Egg Salad...

Is Going To Sit.

I Can't Agree With You Here,
Doctor.

I'm In The Mood
For This Egg Salad.

I've Been Waiting
All Day For It

Dreaming About It.

I Used Just The Right Amount
Of Mayonnaise

A Touch Of Paprika,
Chopped Celery

Olives--The Green Ones.

I'll Give You
A Little Bit Of It.

Um... Uh...

Just Out Of Curiosity

Was That In The Refrigerator
In The Yellow Bowl?

Yes!

Did It Have
A Piece Of Tape Over It

That Said "E.T."?

That's The One,"E.T."

That's Me.

Oh, I Thought It Stood
For "Eat This."

You Ate It, Didn't You?

Open Up, Roy.

(Imitating Door Opening)

Here You Go.

I Saved Some For You!

Sandwich?

Yeah.

You Made A Sandwich
Of My...

My Luscious Egg Delight?

Well, How Do You Eat It?

Au Naturel

Not... Not Slathered
On Some Hoagy Roll.

You Take The Top Off

And You Scrape It Off

And You Don't Worry.

I Don't Want To Scrape It Off.

What's The Big Deal?

You Scrape It Off The Bread,
That's All.

Finish What You Started.

And...And In A Truck.

In A Truck?

(Cartoon Music On Television)

Hi, Grandpa.

All Right, I Got Just The Thing
For You Guys

And Granddad's

Going To Fix Something
For You...

So Good.

Hey!
Hey!

Right, Hey!

Listen, You Guys Got A Mess
Of Crumbs All Over The House.

There Are Crumbs
In Books

There's Jelly And Bread
All The Places

Where People Sit
And Everything

But I Figured It Out.

From Now On When You Eat,
I Got A Nice Restaurant For You.

As A Matter Of Fact,
It's Right In Here.

This Is Where
You're Going To Eat.

Here's What We're Going To Do.

This Is A Fort, See?

And We Want You To Protect
The Fort From Nasty Crumbs.

This Is Your g*n.

Now You Have One Here.

Whenever You See A Crumb
You Say, "Clean Up The Fort!"

Like The Cowboys Say

"Watch It, Pard, We Got
To Clean 'Em Up."

Let Me Hear It.

There You Go!

See, There's A Crumb.

Get It!

All Right.

That's It.

That's Where You Eat,
That's Where You Clean Up

In The Fort.

Okay.

Hey, How Did You Get Out
Of There?

Back In The Fort.

I'm Too Big
To Be In Here.

You're Not.

We Can Get Out
Anytime We Want.

I Know You Can.

That's The Point.

You Should Not Want To Get Out.

You Stay In There.

When You Have A Crumb,
Clean It Up.

The Reason You're In Here

Is Because You Can't Control

Your Crumbs.

Whoo! Boy, You Guys
Are Something.

Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey!

Why Do You Keep Getting
Out Of There?

Huh?

Now Get Back In.

Never Mind.

Look, I'll Tell You
What We'll Do.

Okay, Now, Let Me Show You.

You Hold This

And You Hold Your Cookie.

All Right, Now,
We'll Just Take This

Put This Right There.

You Sit Down On There.

Sit Down On It.

Okay, Now This Is Your Area.

Don't Get Off This Area,
Okay?

Don't Get Off This Area.

You See A Crumb,
Hit It.

Hit It!

There You Go.

This Is Your Fort.

Now You Stay In Here.

What's Going On

In Here?

We're Eating Cookies
In A Fort.

Yeah!

Dad!

What's Wrong?

Elvin, Help Me Get
The Kids Out Of Here.

Okay, Winnie, Nelson,
Go Up To Your Room, Okay?

Up To Your Room, Come On.

That's It.

Go Ahead.

Dad, I Don't Believe
What I'm Seeing In Here.

You Have My Kids In A Cage
With Cookies And A Vacuum?

It's Like...

It's Like Charles Dickens
Revisited.

Dickens Never Had Cookies
And A Vacuum.

Dad, This Is Pathetic.

You Ought To Be Ashamed
Of Yourself.

Dear, This Is A Fort

And They're There To Protect
My Home

From All These Cookies
And The Crumbs And Stuff.

Elvin, Sondra, Hi.

So, What's New?

What's Happening?

Dad Had Incarcerated
My Children.

I Didn't Incarcerate
Anybody.

This Is A Fort

And I Did That
For Their Protection.

From Whom?

From The, The, Uh...

The Ugly g*ng Of Crumbs
That Were Attacking Them.

Dad, You Are Undermining

Everything
Elvin And I Believe In.

I...

I Understand, Sondra.

I Deserve Everything.

I Just Might As Well...

No, Don't Come Near Me!

Now This Is It.

I Don't Want Anybody
To Stop Me, You Got That?!

From This Point On

You Take Another Step
And I'm A Clean Man.

I Don't Deserve To Live.

Dad, I'm Serious.

I Will Hooverize You

And Anybody Else
That Comes Near Me.

Do You Understand?

Elvin...

I Think He Means It.

If You Don't Agree
With Your Father's Methods

Maybe You Shouldn't Leave Him
In Charge.

Yeah, Especially
With One Of Those.

as*ault With
A Cleanly w*apon.

You Weren't Laughing
Two Hours Ago

When He Sucked Up
Your Egg Salad.

I Didn't Suck Up The Egg Salad.

All I Did Was Make A Sandwich,
And I Ate The Egg Salad.

You Finished It,
All Right.

Yeah?

Well, First Of All,
Let Me Explain Something.

I Thought It Was A Gift.

I Should Have Known Better

Because It's My Eggs,
My Mayonnaise And My Bowl.

The Only Thing
That Belonged To You

Was The Tape That You Wrote
Your Initials On

Which You Probably Stole
From The Hospital

In The First Place.

No, It Was My Tape
And My Recipe

And That's The Last
You'll Ever Taste Of It.

Well, I Don't Need
Any Recipes.

I Will Tell You
What I Could Use.

I Could Use
A Little Peace And Quiet

And My Own Newspaper
Every Now And Then.

I'm The One Who Sits There Like
A Lapdog Waiting For A Section.

I Offered You A Section, Elvin.

The Real Estate Section.

The One I Thought You Could Use.

We Are Trying Very Hard
Not To Be A Burden.

When?

When?

We Do Some Of The Housework,
And Elvin Spends

All Of His Energy
Showering You With Gifts.

I Don't Need Gifts!

I Don't Want
Any Dinky Cologne Samples.

If He Wanted
To Give Me A Present

He Could Give Me
My Periodicals

So I Could Read Them
And Have No Jelly And Bread

Mixed In The Pages

Instead Of Little Ditzy Gifts.

Well, I Wouldn't Feel

Like I Had To Give You
"Ditzy Little Gifts"

If I Didn't Feel
Like A Trapped Rat!

You Studied Animals.

You Know What To Do.

If You're A Trapped Rat
And You Feel Like One

Gnaw Your Foot Off

And Get Out.

Okay, All Right,
All Right.

Obviously,
We're All On Edge Here.

I'm Not On Edge.

I'm Having Fun.

I Am Having Fun.

Look, Mom And Dad,
To Be Perfectly Honest...

It's Going To Be More
Than Just A Couple Of Days.

How Long, Sondra?

It Will Be
Days At Most.

We're Having
A Little Problem
With Escrow.

Escrow?
Escrow?

You Take Time
And Think About It.

If We're Too Much Of A Burden

We'll Just Take The Children
And Go To A Hotel.

Oh, There You Go
With That Again.

We'll Just Go Upstairs.

Take Them
To A Hotel.

Take The Wedge Ends Too.

Right

Take Your Wedgy
Up There.

Here We Go, Here We Go.

It's That Same Stuff
They Tried To Pull Before

And It Worked
That Time.

"We'll Just Go
To A Mot..."

And Then They Use
The Grandchildren

And They'll
Come Downstairs

With Torn And Tattered
Clothing.

"Good-Bye, Grandma,
Good-Bye, Grandpa."

Then You And I Will Feel Guilty
And Say, "Okay, You Can Stay."

They're Going To Use Us.

They're Bluffing.

I'm Going To Talk To My Father.

He'll Be Coming Back
With Olivia Soon.

He And Mom Have Two Rooms
And They Don't Use Those Rooms

And My Father Loves
To Take The Children Out.

He's Always Playing With Them

And I'll Just Put It
Right To Him--

"About Days, Dad

You Keep Sondra,
Elvin And The Twins"

And He'll...

Great-Grandfather,
Love To Show Them Off.

He'll Go For That.

He Better Go For It.

He's My Father.

Ohh, You Had Your Face Painted
At The Street Fair.

Yes, I'm The Sun.

Yes, You Are.

Oh, My Goodness,
Look At This.

We Got

A Whole Solar System Here.

What Else Did You Do?

We Got Our Palms Read
By Madam Omajh.

She Gave Me
Her Secret Powers.

Want Me To Read
Your Palm?

How Much?

Five Dollars.

Okay, One Dollar.

Okay.

Okay, Olivia.

You Can Read My Palm,
Olivia.

That Is Madam Olivia.

Ex-Squeeze Me,
Madam Olivia.

Go Ahead.

Let Me See Your Palm.

Ohh!

Ohh.

Interesting Past.

You Going To Do The Past?

I See A Mysterious Woman
With A Funny Name.

Really?

Your Niece?

Your Niece?

Your Niece Can't Tell.

Your Niece Can Tell?

Your Niece Can't Tell.

Is The Name Of The Woman?

Yes.

Look In There

Now Say The Name Again.

Your Niece Can't Tell.

Your Niece Can't Tell.

Could That Be

Eunice Chantilly?

Of Course, Yes!

Yes, Yes, Yes.

Yes, Yes, Yes,
That's The Name.

That's The Name.

Your Hand Was
A Little Smudged.

I'm Sorry.

Read On.

When You Was Little

You Did Something That Got You
In Big Trouble.

Uh-Huh, Like What?

It's Becoming Clearer.

I See A Bicycle--

Tumbling, Tumbling

Tumbling In The Air

And Now I See A Boy
Tumbling, Tumbling, Tumbling

On The Pavement.

I Hear A Father Yelling,
"Heathcliff, You Fool!"

You See All That?

Yes.

Now, Look In There.

Can You See The Bike?

Yes.

Okay, What Color
Is The Bike?

It's Getting Cloudy.

The Forces Of Madam Olivia
Is Fading, Fading, Fading.

My Powers Are Gone.

And So Is Your Dollar.

(Laughing)

Well, That's Good Work,
Madam Russell.

Well, She's Learning.

Listen, I Want To Talk To You
About Something Serious.

Certainly, Son, But First
Let Me See Your Palm.

Uh-Oh.

I See It.

It's Clear.

I See A Man.

A Grown Man
With A Family In A House

And It's Getting Crowded.

Crowded.

I See An Even Older Man
With White Hair--

A Kind Man, A Noble Man,
A Wise Man.

He Has His Own Home.

He's Giving Support,
But No Lodging.

Sit Up Straight,
Heathcliff.
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