08x16 - Eat, Drink and Be Wary

[bunniefuu]

Theo!

Here's Your Mom's Bags!

Well, Cliff...

I'm Off.

All Right, Honey.

Take Care.

Don't You Want To Stay
A Little While?

Do You Have To Leave?

Well, No.

Well, Good.

But I Better.

I Better Leave Right Now.

I Better Go Now.

Well, Washington's Gain
Is Our Loss.

I Want You
To Behave Yourself.

In This Dress?

I Don't Want You
Going Out There

Running Up And Down
The Hallways

Knocking
On Strange Men's Doors

And Streaking
Past The White House.

Well, What Can I Do Then?

I Know What You'll Be Doing.

What Will I Be Doing?

Tell Me.

Tell Me To Behave Myself

And You've Got An Unsupervised
Weekend Ahead Of You.

Don't Go Up Under There.

How Did You Know I
Was Going Up Under There?

You're Only Going To Get Soot.

That's All, I'm Telling You.

There Is Cholesterol
In This Kitchen

And I Mean To Find It.

I Know You.

There Are Cookies And Chips.

I Haven't...
There's No Chips.

Nothing,
I'm Telling You.

That's What We're Eating, See?

That's What
I'm Eating.

Look At The Greens On Top.

Don't Demonstrate Those Sad
Little Uncut Vegetables To Me.

As Soon As I Walk Out

You'll Take Them Back
To The Market

And Trade Them
For Some Sad Lunch Meat.

Oh, This Is Pitiful.

I Am Hurt.

What's In There?

It's Seven Grain Bread.

Would Have Been Eleven

But I Got
To The Bakery Too Late.

So, That's It.

Go To Washington, D.C.

You've Worn Out Your Welcome.

Go Ahead.

Don't Look
Under The Table.

There's Nothing There.

Theo:
Mom, We're Going To Be Late!

Your Son's Calling You.

Bye-Bye.

Take Care.

You Be Good, Now.

I Will.

All Right.

Go Ahead.

I'll Call You
When I Get There.

I Miss You.

Bye.

Especially In The Dark.

(Sighing)

Aha!

Why Don't You Dry Up?

Aha, What?

Aha, This?

Aha, Yourself.

I'm Slicing These Things.

I'm Cooking.

I've Turned Over A New Leaf Now,
I'm Telling You.

You Never Know When
I'm Going To Show Up.

I'll Be Ready For You.

What Do You Think

About This, And This?

No Way.

What's The Matter With It?

It Doesn't Make A Statement.

You're Wearing Daisies.

What Statement Does That Make?

Look At These.

What Do These Say?

Susan, Those Are So Elegant.

Three For A Dollar
At The Accessory Hut.

Do You Know
How Sharon Williams

And Her So-Called Friends,
Mary And Joanne

Are Getting To The Dance?

Isn't Their Mom
Taking Them?

Their Mothers Are Giving Them
Money For A Cab.

I Don't Believe It.

She's Probably
Just Making That Up.

No. It's True.

We're Going To Hear
About This Forever.

I Know How To Show Sharon Who's
Really Hot And Independent.

What?

Forget About The Cab.

We Could Take The Subway
To The Dance.

Subway?

Into Manhattan? At Night?

What Is More Hot And Independent
Than An Adventuresome Woman?

Rudy, You Are So Right.

Can You Imagine The Look
On Their Faces

When We Tell Them
How We Got There?

Yeah.

Wait.

What About Our Parents?

If We Show Them
We Know What We're Doing

I Don't See Why
They Wouldn't Let Us Go.

Yeah.

By The Way,
How Do We Get There?

Hey, Rudy, Are You Finished
With My Gold Hoop Earrings?

Pam, Charmaine,
Come On In.

If You Were Taking

The Subway Tonight...

Near Laguardia Hall...

...How Would
You Get There?

By The Subway.

From The Clark Street
Station

Take The Number Two Or Three

To st Street In The Bronx,
Or th In Harlem

Stay In The Middle Of The Cars

Transfer At Fulton Street,
Go Upstairs--

This Is Also
The Broadway/Nassau Station--

Take The "A"
To Washington Heights

Or "C" To The Bronx
At West Fourth Street.

Thank You, Charmaine.

Now, Why Would We Want
To Go There?

We Don't.

We're Going To The Movies.

I'm Talking About Them,
Charmaine.

Rudy?

There's A Dance.

And You Think Your Dad

Will Let You Take The Subway?

When Did You First Take
The Subway At Night?

I Was Ten.

And I Was Nine.

I Was Just Tall
For My Age.

If Our Parents
Would Let Us Do That

We'd Be Really Mature By Now.

Instead Of Being Dropped Off
Like Kids.

Listen To That.

They Don't Want
To Be Driven Places.

If My Family Had A Car,
And Time To Drive Me Around

Honey, I Would Call People
To Come Out

And Watch Me Leave.

Well, We Want To Take The Subway.

So, Could We Hear
Those Directions Again?

Take The Two Or The Three
To st Street...

Let Me Get A Pencil And Pad
So I Won't Miss A Thing.

They're Going
To Get Lost.

Come On.

Hello!

Hello!

Hello!

Hello!

Hey...
Hey...

How You Doing, Honey?

Good, Good.

Dr. Huxtable!

Long, Long, Long Time.

Look At You.

You're Looking Good!

Thank You Very Much.

Tracy Just Got In, So We're
Having Dinner At Abbott's.

Oh, My Goodness.

We Thought We'd Stop By
Here First And Say Hi.

Where's Mom?

I Wanted To Return
This Law Book.

Mom Is Away At Washington, D.C.,
Pardon Me.

Lawyer's Convention, You See?

But You Know What?

You Guys Can Join Us.

Oh, No, No.

We're Celebrating.

Tracy Just Drove In
From Oregon.

You're Kidding.

How Long Did It Take?

Six Weeks.

Six Weeks.

Well, You Know,
They've Upped The Speed Limit.

Dr. Huxtable,
I Stopped To Take Photographs.

Oh, Dad... Broccoli?

Steamed.

And Chicken...

Boiled.

Brown Rice?

The Only Way
You Can Do It.

Yes, Indeed.

Where's The Stuff
That You're Going To Eat?

(Sarcastically:)
Heh, Heh, Heh, Heh, Heh.

That's It.

Every Time My Mother's
Out Of Town

My Dad Gorges Himself
On Junk Food.

I'm Telling You,
I Turned Over A New Leaf.

You've Turned Over A New Leaf
A Couple Of Times Before

But The Old Leaf Was Always

Right Under There
Waiting For You.

Go Ahead, Sing Something.

Oh, Okay.

The Attire For Going Out--
You Got It Together?

All:
Yep. We're All Ready.

Okay, And Your Mother

Is Going To Pick
The Three Of You Up Here

And Take You To The Dance?

I'm Asking You A Question.

Yeah.

Okay.

And Your Mother Is Going

To Pick The Three Of You Up
At The Dance

And Drop Rudy Off Here?

That's The Plan.

Or We'll Take
The Subway.

(Tapping Bowl)

Nice Try.

Nice Try.

I Have To Give A Lecture.

I Know None Of You
Like Lectures.

But Rudy Is Our Last Child

And I Knew From Experience--
The Other Four--

That When The Three Of You
Came Down In A Line

There Was Something Tricky
Going On.

So, Then You Walk Off
And You Say

"Or We'll Take The Subway."

See?

Like, Hoping That Maybe My Brain

Fell Into One
Of Those Steam Pots.

Well, It Didn't.

Now, All I Want To Know Is...

Subway...

I Mean,
How Are You Going To Do That?

Oh, We'll Buy Some Tokens.

And You, Too, Have Humor.

I Am Asking How You're Going
To Knock Me Out

Tie Me Up,
Throw Me Down In The Cellar

And The Three Of You
Take Off On A Subway

To Go To This Dance.

We'll Be In High School
In Only Two Years.

This Changes The Subject,
Doesn't It?

We've Gone To The Subway

To Now When You're Graduating
And Going To Be In High School.

What Does That Have To Do
With Tonight's Subway?

We Take The Two
To The Bronx

Or The Three To Harlem.

Then Take
The "C" Or "A"

To The Bronx
Or Washington Heights.

And Then Get Off At
Washington Square/West Fourth.

Good.

So, You Keep That In Mind
Two Years From Now

When You're In High School.

But, Dad...

No, No, No.

Please, Don't "But, Dad" Me.

I've Got Three Young Ladies

Supposed To Have Somebody
Pick Them Up And Take 'Em...

And Now You All
Are Changing This Around.

I Need Two Parents,
A Volunteer

To Ride The Subway Train
With You.

If A Parent Goes

It's The Same
As Driving Us There.

Could You Clarify That?

We Want To Go By Ourselves.

Then The Answer's Easy-- No.

But...

Thank You Very Much.

♪ Da-Dun, Da-Duh... ♪

And That Doesn't Help,
Either.

Not Going To Get Me In Trouble.

"Oh, Yeah, Sure."

"Go Ahead."

"Yeah, Ride."

And I'll Be Popular
With The Kids.

And Then The Parents Call Up.

"Have You Seen Our Children?

They're On The : News,
You Know."

Here It Is, Salad--

Spinach, Mushrooms,
With A Vinaigrette Sauce.

Go Ahead, Hit It.

Salad?
Salad?
Salad?

Yes.

The Crunchy, Green Stuff.

You've All Eaten It Before.

Good For You-- Nutrition.

Oh, Okay, I Get It.

The Nutrients
Before The Feast.

What's The Second Course,
Cousin Cliff?

Cookies!

Chicken!

Ooh!

Boiled, With The Skin
Taken Off.

Ugh.

Well, I Also Have...

Steamed Broccoli!

You Sure Are Serving

A Lot Of Green Food,
Cousin Cliff.

Balance It Out--
Have A Carbohydrate.

French Fries?

Wrong.

Cookies!

Wrong Again.

(Rolling R's:)
Brown Rice.

♪ Ta-Da! ♪

All Right, Hit It.

Soy Sauce...

Come On.

Can I Have Some
Of That Soy Sauce?

Take Some Of This.

Let's Go.

Yeah, Let's Go.

Oh, I'm Sorry.

Ooh, Ooh, Forgive Me.

So, Cousin Pam,
Cousin Best Friend Charmaine

What Are You Doing Tonight?

We're Going
To The Movies.

On The Subway?

Yes.

On The Subway.

So, Cousin Pam,
Cousin Best Friend Charmaine

Where Is This Movie Theater?

Well, I Understand

It's Across The Street
From The Dance

That You're Going To.

What Time Does It Start?

: .

Isn't That
A Coincidence?

Our Dance Starts
At : .

Danielle:
And What Time

Will This Movie
Be Letting Out?

: .

: --

The Same Time
Our Dance Ends.

Well, Dad Won't Let Us Ride
The Subway Alone At Night.

Since We're Going The Same Way,
You Think We Could...

Ride With You?

And Bring You Back?

Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.

You're Going To Have To...

I Already Did.

She Says
It's Okay.

And I Guess...

I Did Too.

Go Ahead.

All Three:
Yes!

Ah, Dr. Huxtable.

Hey.

What Are You Doing?

Reading The Paper,
Catching Up On The News.

Can I Read
The Newspaper Too?

Okay, I'll Give You
The Funnies.

No, No, No.

I Want To Catch Up
On The News.

Okay.

I'll Give You The Front Page.

That's The Front Part
Of The Paper.

That Will Give You
All The News.

All Right?

Perfect. Thank You.

You're Welcome.

Ahh.

Boy, Oh, Boy.

What's The World Coming To?

I Never Thought I'd Live

To See The Day.

You Never Thought You'd Live
To See The Day What, Dear?

You Have To Wait
Until I'm Finished.

Boy, Oh, Boy.

Give Me This.

Boy, Oh, Boy, Huh?

Mm-Hmm.

Boy...

Boy, Oh, Boy.

Says Here

That Olivia Kendall
Has To Wash The Dishes

And Clean The Stove

And Do The Kitchen Floor.

Boy, Oh, Boy!

What?!

Yes.

Give Me That Paper.

It Says Right Here

That Dr. Huxtable
Has To Give Olivia

Puppies, Plus...

Bowls Of Ice Cream
At : Tonight.

Where Am I Going To Get All That
By : Tonight?

I Don't Know.

Look In Your Paper.

It Has All The Big News.

Ahh.

Coming Up Next, The Main Event:
The Freeman-Price Bout.

Hey, Dad.

Oh, Hi.

Hi. Hi, Honey.

How Are You?

Good. Great.

How Was Dinner?

Great. Tracy Dropped Me Off.

Well, Good.

Um...

Yeah, So, So, So, Uh...
Dinner Was Fine

And All The Children
Are Gone Now

And Olivia's Upstairs.

Got Her All Bedded Down

And, Um, I'm Thinking
About Turning In Myself.

So, Um...

You Planning On Staying?

Mm-Hmm.

(Doorbell Rings)

Dr. Huxtable,
Here You Go.

Um, Buffalo Wings,
Extra Sauce On The Side.

Your Soda's In Here.

One Pizza, And One Pint
Of Coffee Ice Cream.

Mrs. Huxtable Must Be Gone.

Looks Like
It's Going To Be

A Good Fight Tonight.

Olivia, This Food
You Ordered Is Here!

Thank You.

Enjoy The Fight, Doctor.

Yeah, Thank You.

Thank You.

They're Not Allowed Up Here.

You Are The First

And So, I Want You To Enjoy This
To The Fullest, Because...

(Phone Ringing)

...I'm Going To Enjoy You.

(Cunning Laughter)

Hello?

Hi, Sweetheart.

Uh...

Uh...

And How Are You?

I'm Fine.

I Owe You An Apology.

I Doubted Your Commitment
To Your Diet

And That Was Wrong.

Yeah, Well, Listen, Honey

Don't Make A Big Thing
Out Of It.

Don't Wear Yourself Out,
You Know?

Just Let Bygones Be...

Bygones, Okay?

How Was Your Dinner?

Dinner?

Yeah.

Oh, It Was Fantastic.

Just Enjoyed It.

You Know, The Broccoli Florets--

They Were Like Little Brooms,
Sweeping Out The Arteries.

Oh, I'm Glad You Feel Better.

You Must Be Very,
Very Exhausted By Now

So Get Yourself Some Rest.

Well, I Am.

I Am Tired

But I Attended
A Most Interesting Seminar Today

On Partnership Assessment.

Do You Know What
The Most Important Element

In A Successful Partnership Is?

Trust?

I Love You.

Good Night.

Yes, I Love You, Too, Honey.

Good Night.

Okay.

Dirty, Dirty, Dirty...

Dirty...

Dirty...

Dirty, Lowdown...

No-Good... Wife.

Dirty!

Able To Look
Through The Telephone.

Aw, You're A No-Good,
Dirty, Dirty...

See?

Even God Doesn't Want Me
To Have It.