03x35 - Smoochy Kiss

[bunniefuu]

(JAUNTY MUSIC)

CHILLI: Whoo! Yeah!

Shake it, Bluey.
(GIGGLES)

Oh, why did you stop?

I don't like this part of the song.

You gotta take the good
with the bad, kid.

BOTH: Huh?

Why are there forks
in the spoon bit?

The same reason all the cupboards
are left open,

there's an apron in the sink
and the fridge door's never shut -

your dad.

Does that mean you don't like dad?
What?

Well, you're saying that
because the cupboard doors...

How's it going, single ladies?
BOTH: Hey, Dad!

Oh. Hey, morning, kids.

How was your run, sweetheart?
Uh-uh!

What? What?
He's not yours anymore. He's OURS.

Yeah. He belongs to us.

But I want a smoochy kiss.
No! You can't have him!

What? Why not?

You said you don't like him 'cause
he leaves the cupboard doors open.

What?!
I never!

Come here. Give me a smoochy. Oh!
No! He's ours.

He's mine!
Get away!

Ladies, ladies,
there's plenty to go round.

Bingo, egg beater!
Ooh, yeah.

Egg beater. b*at, b*at, b*at!
Bingo!

Boom! Yah! Yah! Yah!

Yah!
Argh!

Whisk att*ck! Whisky, whisky, whisky.
(LAUGHS)

Saucepan shield!

Bingo, get Dad outta here.

OK. Come here, you.

Uh, yep. OK. Very good.

(GIGGLES) Dad is ours forever now.

Oop! (CHUCKLES)
Yah!

Whoooo!

Well, good luck with that.

This episode of Bluey
is called Smoochy Kiss.

This way. This way.

Keep an eye out for Mum, Bingo.

She just wants a smoochy kiss.

No more smoochy kisses for her.

Yeah. You belong to us.

Alright. So am I still married?

We'll figure that out later.

But now we have to get you
somewhere safe.

Yeah, somewhere... Eww!

Your armpit is leaking.

Eww. So is this one.

Yeah, I've just been for a run.

OK, well,
just keep your arms down, please.

Alright.

Come on.

Check for Mum, Bingo.
She could be hiding.

OK.

Hmm...

Ew, Dad! What's that?!

Huh? Oh. Looks like gravy.

Eww!

Yep. Gravy.

She's not here. I looked everywhere.

Yah!
(SQUEALS) No!

Smoochy kiss!

(ALL LAUGH)

Run!
Me as well?

BOTH: Yes!
OK. (PANTS)

I just want a smoochy kiss.

(GIGGLES) Come on!

Hey, kids,
I actually need the toilet.

What?! No way. It's too risky.

Oh. Well, your mum lets me
go to the toilet.

(GROANS) OK.

It's clear.

OK, do your business
and do it quickly.

Yes, boss.
And peeing only.

Deal.

I'll stay here.
Bingo, you guard outside.

OK.

Ah, that's it.

Keep your eye out for Mum.

She'll do anything
for a smoochy kiss.

Can't say I blame her.

Are you almost finished?
Almost.

Ow! Ooh.

Oh, duck cake!
What happened?

(TOILET FLUSHES)
Nothing.

Why are you hopping?

I peed on my foot.
(SHRIEKS)

Why did you pee on your foot?!

I wasn't paying attention.
Why not?!

I was trying to pull
a nose hair out.

You've got hairs in your nose?!

That's disgusting!

Welcome to middle age, kid.

Argh! What are you doing now?!

What's it look like?
I'm washing the pee off my foot.

But that's the laundry tub!

So?

It's not for washing pee
off your foot!

Well, it is now.
Ahhhhhh!

Is everything alright in...
(THUMP!)

Huh?

I don't remember that box
being there.

Oh, well. Bluey?
(THUMP!)

Hey. Did that box move?

This is outrageous.

Toughen up, kid.

(SCREAMS) That's my shirt!

Ah, you hardly wear it.

Bluey, are you sure
everything's O...

(THUMP!)

This box is definitely getting...

(SQUEALS)
(MUNCHES)

The box is eating me! (LAUGHS)

Oh, no! It's Mum! She's here!

Alright. Where to, boss?

Um, OK...look...

..you still belong to us

but you have to promise not to do
any more disgusting things.

OK, I promise.

No more disgusting things.

Good. Let's go.

Hang on, one more. (GRUNTS)

(GIGGLES)

Arghhh!
Bluey, what is it?

(GAGS) Dad did a fluffy!

Ooh. Sure did.

Ahhh! Let me in the box!

Ah!

Quick, Mum, now's your chance
for a smoochy kiss.

Alright.
No!

Mum, don't go near him.
What? Why?

It's not safe!

Oh, Bandit.
Hoo, it's travelling.

Come on,
we have to get you out of here.

Smoochy, smoochy, smoochy!

(PANTS)
We have to hide you.

Oh, don't be silly.

Smoochy, smoochy, smoochy.
(BOTH SQUEAL)

Stand back!
Watch out, Bandit! She's got basil!

But I want a smoochy kiss.

BOTH: No!
Just a small one.

Mum, I've got news for you -
that guy is disgusting!

Yeah.
Oh, what are you talking about?

OK, first,
he eats his own gravy stains.

BANDIT AND CHILLI: True.

His armpits are stinky.
Correct.

His nose is hairy.
Very hairy.

He does fluffies.
Stinky fluffies.

And he peed on his own foot.

Oh. That's a new one.

It's not, actually.
He's a grub!

Kids, I'm used to all that.
BOTH: What?!

You gotta take the good
with the bad.

Yeah, your mum's no bunch of roses
either.

You ever smelt her breath
in the morning.

No.
(HUFFS)

(BOTH GAG)

And that's BEFORE
I've had my sardines.

Eww.

And that's just one of the long
list of disgusting things that...

(MUNCH!)

..I will keep to myself.

Kids, if you're gonna belong to
someone, you better toughen up.

(BOTH GAG)
You can... (GAGS)

..keep each other.

BOTH: Works for me.

(BOTH GROAN AND GAG)