02x08 - Bolognese

[bunniefuu]

You alright?

Yeah.

I’m alright.

CLAIRE:
Everything's fine.

(exhales)

So what's today?

Um, NICET exam. Level .

CLAIRE:
That sounds really serious.

Yeah, it's boss level.

Hey.

CARMY: Hi.

(whispering)
What’s NICET Level ?

Uh, NICET Level ,
it's a fire suppression exam.

Um, it pretty much, it has
to go right above the... stove.

What?

I'm really sorry.
I just, like, um...

Never ever apologize.

CARMY: I just
want you to know...

that this is really nice.

So nice that, I, uh...

You're waiting
for the other shoe.

That's it.

-You wanna know a secret?
-CARMY: Yes.

Nobody's keeping track of shoes.

Whoa.

I know!

Okay, so the...
system is above the stove?

-The system is above the stove.
-CLAIRE: Mm-hmm.

And, um, you know,
it-it has to go off

if something catches fire,
that could get outta control.

-So above Richie? Hm-mm?
-Yes.

So Fak would be holding it

and Richie
spontaneously combusts,

there's fire everywhere,

the suppression system
shuts off the gas line,

and it would spray him

with a sodium potassium
bicarbonate solution.

And then we-we put this,
uh, balloon on the line

and if the balloon fills up--

If it leaks, you fail.

If it leaks, we fail,
and if it doesn't--

You've achieved Level .

-Wow. You've done it.
-We've done it.

Yeah.

Um...

Can I ask you a question?

CLAIRE: Mm-hmm.

Is this just the most
boring sh*t
you've ever heard?

-No, it's so interesting.
-Is it?

CLAIRE: How often
do you get to talk about

sodium potassium bicarbonate?

Um, probably about as often

as you hope
a balloon doesn't blow up.

Anything else you're thinking?

I'm thinking
you're very, very beautiful.

Well... break a leg, Bear.

("Lay My Love" by Brian Eno
and John Cale playing)

(Claire chuckles)

♪ ♪

♪ I am the crow
of desperation ♪

♪ I need no fact
or validation ♪

♪ ♪

Not open yet, ma'am.

Thank you, sir.

I was looking for some old,
mean so-and-so named Tina.

I'm Tina.

How can I help you?

This used to be
a good restaurant here.

What happened to it?

TINA:
Well, they had to close.

I heard there were too many
old b*tches working here

couldn't hack it.

Maybe some... old b*tches
like their bitch ways.

Maybe they're happy
with where they are.

Maybe they don't want
to change too much.

Maybe they get scared.

Afraid.

Yeah. Makes sense.

That's how an old bitch
would think.

But that's why
they surround themselves

with bad m*therf*ckers
who take care of them.

Push their ass.

This a drive-through now?

Yeah, well, they wanted
to sell OG through here,

but they're having
a really hard time hiring.

(sighs) Too much changes.

TINA:
No, too many hustlers.

They all wanna be Top Jeff.

But what they
really looking for
is a stubborn, childish,

immature, pain-in-the-ass...
with arthritis

to run this thing
during the day.

I might know a guy.

Send me his info.

SYDNEY:
What are you thinking about?

CARMY:
Fire suppression test. You?

SYDNEY:
Controlling the zone,

staying calm,
creating space, trust.

How do we do that?

I don't know.
It's hard to without a gas line.

Right.

When's that guy coming in?
N... Never mind.

That's a stupid
f*ckin' question.

Deliveries come
in five minutes,

we got new hires in an hour,

and we're two weeks out
from open.

If we fail this next test,

-we're f*cked.
-We are f*cked.

-Exactly.
-Exactly.

The best offenses
have the ability to reset

and-and adapt on a dime.

Book?

SYDNEY:
Book, yeah.

We can do that, though.

We have to.

(unscrews cap)

(door opens)

Okay, let me say one thing
before you start laughing at me.

I don't hear
anybody laughing, G.

I get it.

-Eleven Madison Dickhead.
-(Richie scoffs)

Alright.

A hundred and six miles
to Chicago.

Full t*nk of gas.

Half a pack of cigarettes.

It's dark.
We’re wearing sunglasses.

Hit it.

(Carmy whistles)

♪ ♪

I really thought that
that was gonna work.

Really did not.

Yeah, well, the
fire suppression's working,

but the gas just won't shut off.

Well, that wasn't
whatever you just did.

SYDNEY: Behind.

Oh! My f*cking God.

f*ck! Neil!

FAK:
Carmy said he was
gonna handle it.

SYDNEY: Okay, well,
he obviously didn't, so...

FAK: Gotta figure out
the gas line first, Chef.

SYDNEY: f*ck me.

So we just like clock into work,
we don't say hi to people?

Is that like
a Danish tradition?

Relax.
I was gonna surprise you.

We just don't
say hello anymore?

-I was gonna surprise you.
-With what?

MARCUS:
With this. One of three.

I see you with the olive oil.

-MARCUS: Mm-hmm.
-SYDNEY: Mm-hmm.

CARMY: Yo, corner.

-Dextrose.
-MARCUS: Thank you, Chef.

It's gonna be interesting.

Whoa.

Very yes. Yo, what's up?
We good?

Hi. Um, not really.
Fridge is still broken as f*ck.

-CARMY: f*ck. Right. sh*t.
-SYDNEY: Yeah.

CARMY:
I'm sorry. I just, um...

f*ck. I had this gnarly
panic att*ck last night,

and I was telling, uh,
Claire about this time, uh,

this time at Christmas.

My mom drove her car
through the house.

-Um, who's Claire?
-She's a girl that’s a friend.

Ooh, it's his girlfriend.
Oh, so, so sorry.

She's a girl that's a friend?

-She's a girlfriend? You think?
-Ooh.

Okay. Uh, next.
Your mom drove a car
through a house?

Yes. Our house.
It was actually very f*cked.

Um...

Anyway, we would always have,
uh, cannolis, you know,

after Christmas dinner.

And so I always hated cannolis
'cause I associated them

with my weird,
f*cked-up family and, um.

And, I don't know, I was
talking to Claire last night

and I kinda had
this-this realization

that maybe I could,
I could kinda take them back,

you know, make them my own.

The cannolis, you know.

O-okay. Yeah. Whoa. Yeah.

-That's healthy.
-CARMY: Thank you. Yes.

I've been thinking
about cannolis

and more specifically,
um, savory ones.

-Okay. Like with
the mortadella mousse?
-CARMY: Mm-hmm.

-Parmesan shell.
-CARMY: Yeah. Yeah.

Uh, dipped in pistachio.

-Ooh. That's something.
-That's something, right?

-On it.
-CARMY: Thank you, Chef.

(buzzer buzzes)

Oh, sh*t. Those are new hires.

-Ready?
-CARMY: Nope.

SYDNEY:
Great. Me neither.

-Tina?
-TINA: Chef!

SYDNEY:
Yo, new hires are here.

Comin'.

Marcus?

What's up?

For real.

SYDNEY:
Okay, it's Daniela,
Josh, and Connor.

CARMY: How green?

Emerald.

What do you want me
to start 'em on?

Um, drill through
that produce and, uh--

And stock lowboys.

-Yes.
-Yes.

Alright.

Go get your squad, T.

Alright. Yes, Chef.

♪ Laugh instead of crying ♪

♪ Yes, it's time
for you to laugh ♪

♪ So keep on trying ♪

♪ Oh, oh ♪

♪ There's one thing
you gotta do ♪

♪ To make me still want you ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now, oh ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now,
oh ♪

-Let’s go, freshmen.
-ALL: Yes, Chef.

♪ Stop it, stop it ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now, oh ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now ♪

♪ Stop it, stop it,
stop it, stop it ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now,
oh ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now, oh ♪

♪ Oh, stop, stop, stop ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now, oh ♪

♪ Gotta stop sobbing now,
oh ♪

Okay, I know you can't
give me an exact time,

but what if I said
the fire suppression exam

might be between the hours
of : and : ?

Would that be accurate?

You can't say. Uh-huh.

Got it.

You’re wearing a suit?

No, not you.

No. Thanks for not a lot.

Sorry. You're wearing a
suit?

Uh, yeah, I wear suits now.

Ah, understood.

What can I help you with?

May I sit?

You may sit.

-Hit me.
-I, uh...

I wanna apologize.

(soft chuckle) For?

Everything, I guess.

SUGAR: Okay, hold on.

Hey, can the closest person

outside my office
come in here, please?

What's up, Nat?

Gary, Richie would like
to apologize to me,

and I'd like a witness.

-Hell, yeah.
-SUGAR: Yeah.

Go ahead.

I'm being serious.

Yeah, so am I.

Turn up the heat.
Let's go.

Alright. Um...

I think for a long time,
I didn't really know

where I fit, you know, and...

I would shove myself
into, like, places

and things where
I definitely did not fit.

And I think that
that probably...

definitely...
made things worse.

And I'm sorry

if I took anything out on you

and if I treated you like sh*t.

Um, because I actually do think
that we could fit good together.

I could be good at things
that you don't really wanna do.

And you're obviously really
great at a whole bunch of stuff

that I don't know how to do,
you know?

That's why
you're wearing the suit.

Um... I'm wearing a suit

'cause it makes me
feel better about myself.

What do we think?

I think he did
a really nice job.

Thanks, Gary.

It felt genuine.

Like from his soul.
No G&R.

Why are you
wearing a suit?

Why are you covered in sh*t?

I was fixing the gas line.

Well, I wear suits now.

That's so sick.

Neil, honey, can you
get the f*ck outta here?

You're getting dirt everywhere.

Well... can my sister
come to Friends and Family?

(laughs) Francie Fak?

No, she can go f*ck, my love.

Is it 'cause
of the thing or like--

What do you think?

You-- Really?

-Use your brain, babe.
-FAK: Yeah.

"Is it because of the thing?"

No gavones
at Friends and Family.

Francie Fak.

(Sugar scoffs)

SUGAR:
(whispers) Stupid...

Look, Natalie, you know,
if there's anything at all

that I can do to make
your life here easier, tell me,

I'll f*cking do it.

I need this place to work.

We need this place
to work.

(sighs)

Baby steps.

Okay?
You and I will interview
front of house today.

-Okay.
-SUGAR: Okay.

-Deal.
-SUGAR: Deal.

Deal.

Oh-ho-ho. Ma.
Ma que bella.

-SUGAR: Yep.
-RICHIE: Oh, my God.

I know.

Where the f*ck
does the time go?

SUGAR: I don't know.

Hey.

Thank you for apologizing.

(sighs) Okay.

TINA:
Garde manger
needs to see...

-CARMY: Corner.
-TINA: ...at the station.

-Behind. Behind.
-SYDNEY: Behind. Behind.

Um, hey, hey.

I wanted to, uh,
show you something.

Um... I was
thinking about the, uh,

the-the grapes
and the bone broth.

-Right? Um...
-SYDNEY: Sure.

Wait. What is this?

Are we, are we drawing?
Are we doing drawings now?

Well, no. I had to draw these
'cause we didn't have the heat,

-so I couldn't show you--
-You had to draw them?

So then you, like,
whip out these
f*ckin' Sistine Chapel--

-Like, there's,
like, shading here.
-Yeah. Right.

Okay, just listen.
So, uh, uh...

I-I was thinking,
we'd do the, uh,

frozen grapes
in a bowl standalone, right?

-And then--
-We'd pour the broth over hot.

-CARMY: Yes. Exactly.
-Tableside. That's nice.

And then I did...
I had this other thought
that, um...

-TINA: Housekeeping, Chef.
-I'm sorry, that's just,
that’s actually...

This is just
driving me f*ckin' crazy.

SYDNEY: This, um,
prosciutto, by the way,

do we know
where we're sourcing this?

Uh, yeah, yeah.

My homie, uh,
from high school,

he's running
an Iberico account, and, uh,

-so he's gonna hook it up.
-SYDNEY: Great. Okay.

Uh, did we talk to him
about a deal or...

Uh, yeah,
I'll give you his number

and, uh, you can go ahead
and you can call him.

Oh, um, we can get tardivo
at the same place

that we're getting
our spinach, by the way.

-So...
-Oh, no, no. We actually...

We don't need
the spinach anymore.

Why don't we need
the spinach anymore?

Well, I had a thought,
if you could just, um...

Thank you.
I had a thought on, um...

on plating.

Um, I'll show you...

-...uh, here.
-This looks kinda like
a chaos menu.

Well, no, it's like,
it's a thoughtful chaos menu.

-Oh.
-Look, Claire and I,

we were talking
about it last night,

and-and she helped me realize
that maybe I was clinging on

to some things that...

I don't know, maybe I just,

I don't care that much
about anymore.

Right?
And this is good, right?

'Cause this is,
this is what you wanted.

-Uh, yeah, it is. Yeah.
-CARMY: Right.

Um, yeah, okay.

Yeah. Uh, yeah.

Great. Tell Claire
I said thank you, then.

TINA:
Take your time.

-Yeah, totally.
-Totally.

Yo. Why are you
being like that?
What's up?

(sighs) I just, um, I didn't
know that we were, like,

running our menu
by Claire.

We're not running
the menu by Claire.

Should I also send
my revised COGS
to your girlfriend?

You don't need
to send anything--
She's not my girlfriend.

-So she's not even
your girlfriend.
-Right.

And we're, like,
arranging this menu--

She's not arranging anything,

and she's not looking
at the menu.

-Yeah she is, man.
-This is what
you wanted originally,

and that's what I'm giving you,
and so awesome?

-No, not awesome.
-CARMY: And I'm sorry.

I, like, f*cking, like,
hated cannolis my whole life

-and now--
-Stop, stop. Stop.

Stop.

(Sydney sighs)

-Sorry.
-SYDNEY: I'm sorry.

Okay? I'm tired.

-No. No, no, no. I'm sorry.
-I'm... I've-I've been tired,

but I'm really tired,
and that wasn't cool.

-Yes. Same.
-SYDNEY: And... Okay.

-I am tired. And, um...
-Alright.

CARMY:
Like, wherever
I'm-I'm-I'm f*ckin' up,

just let me know
I'm-I'm f*ckin' up

'cause I am, like, I'm...
You know, I'm trying.

I know that you're trying.
I see that you're trying.

Obviously.
You're f*ckin' doing
these beautiful drawings.

Obviously
you're trying, it's--

-CARMY: Right.
-Yeah.

Okay, so we're like...

We're okay? We're back?

-We are good.
-CARMY: Good.

-We're good? Okay.
-Yes.

I just think
you need to decide.

What do you mean?
What do I need to decide?

SYDNEY:
I mean, many things.

But chief among them
might be if this person

is your girlfriend
or your friend that's a girl.

-Yeah, right, that's...
-SYDNEY: So...

-I'm being shitty?
-SYDNEY: I mean, not great.

-Okay.
-SYDNEY: Yeah.

Listen, I don't, I don't,
I don't wanna be, uh, shitty.

Okay. So don't be.

-(knives chopping)
-TINA: Behind.

Oh, cool. So, like,
I just won't be then.

-Okay, alright.
-Like, that'll work.

Relax. Yeah, yeah.

I'm a problem solver,
and you always
put the restaurant first.

So whatever I have to do to
put out a fire, lead or follow,

I'm doing it.

SUGAR:
That's a great answer.

Thank you.

You'll be hearing from us.

Really lookin' forward to it.

Yeah, us, too.

-Thanks.
-RICHIE: Hey, good luck.

SUGAR: Bye.

-(door opens and closes)
-I mean...

Well, she ain't it.

She's got seven years.

Elske, Oriole, Smyth.

Yeah, that's a lot of
moving around for seven years,

but that's not
why we can't hire her.

Okay, why can't we hire her?

We can't hire her
because every single napkin

on this table is folded
in alignment

with the salad fork
except for hers.

She just... sat there.

What do you mean?

We're here for minutes.

She's there looking at that,

knowing that napkin's
facing the wrong direction.

Did you turn the napkin
beforehand?

Sugar, you guys want stars.
That ain't a star catcher.

If I'm her, that napkin

would've driven me
f*ckin' crazy,

and I would have fixed it.

-(sighs)
-Wow.

You turned the napkin.

Yeah.
Of course, I did.

("The Crane Wife "
by The Decemberists playing)

-What, you hiding?
-Yeah.

You, too?

-Yeah.
-I ran two more tests myself,

and I just...
I can't figure it out.

♪ All clothed
in a snowy shroud ♪

Is Claire my girlfriend?

I think so.

What, do you have to like...

You have to, like, ask,
you have to, like, to see?

-"Girlfriend's" a horrible word.
-Yeah. "Are you my girlfriend?"

-That's, like,
that's f*cked, right?
-Totally f*cked.

Right back here.

This is Tina. This is
the lady you wanna see.

Richie.

Baby, you just
came from a funeral?

Yeah, a funeral
of all my enemies.

No, I wear suits now, T.

Oh. sh*t.
You wear them well, papa.

(Tina laughs)

Big man.
How can I help you, sir?

Equipment delivery for you.

Okay.

♪ Each feather,
it fell from skin ♪

Science, baby.

Do you want her
to be your girlfriend?

Uh, like,
what-what is a girlfriend?

Well, how much do you love her?

I don't know.
I just like, like,
I love her a lot.

Mm. That's nice.

-Hey.
-Hey.

-You good?
-Yeah.

-Are you?
-Yeah.

Yeah, I'm alright.

Your suit is-is nice.

-RICHIE: Oh, thanks.
-Yeah.

I wear suits now.

Nice.

-You smell good.
-Oh.

Uh, thanks.

Listen, Carmen thought
this might be nice on the line,

but he wanted me
to run it by you

in case you maybe
thought it was too intense.

No, I-I think it's nice.

-Thanks for asking.
-Yeah, sure.

Um...

Yeah.

Did your family
have a catchphrase?

No.
Uh, I'm an only child.

Yeah. Same.

It's nice, though,
that you had, uh,
Carm and Nat.

Yeah.

Now you do, too.

Alright. Hit me
if you need anything.

Okay.

Sorry, just...

♪ All out beyond horizon ♪

♪ A gray sky, a bitter sting ♪

How long until
they can come back?

Three weeks.

So, really, if we fail...

-We really fail.
-(exhales) Hit me.

♪ And I will hang my head ♪

-Jesus.
-♪ Hang my head low ♪

(phone buzzing)

-Hey, Unc.
-CICERO (over phone):
Hey, sweetheart.

Listen, I'm out back.

Can you come, uh,
meet me in the car?

Uh, any particular reason?

CICERO:
So as to not make a scene.

Got it.

SUGAR: Okay.

What do you got?

So how's that baby?

SUGAR: Uh, getting close.

-CICERO: Name yet?
-SUGAR: Not yet.

I got a million things
to do, Jimmy.

Okay, so, look,
I gotta say a lot of things.

Appraisal on the lot came back.

Not great.
Not bad. Not great.

SUGAR: Okay.

But here's where things
get, uh, get funky, right?

Well, as long as we're closed

we're gonna get hammered
on taxes, obviously,

but it's starting to look like
skyrocketing interest rates.

Now, you guys, read "me,"

are into the building
at three and a half.

But, you know,
if we have to refinance

'cause, uh, you know,
there's no money coming in,

we're still closed,

the best we're gonna do
is like seven.

SUGAR: Oh, fu...

But in the real world,
probably more like nine,

which might as well be ten.

-f*ck.
-CICERO: Yeah, f*ck.

Now, look, it's all okay
if there's something
coming in, right?

But, Nat, if there's
nothing coming in,

it's not okay.

So I gotta ask you,
and I need you
to be straight with me.

Can you be open in ten days?

Or more clear...

you f*ckin' gotta be.

You understand me?

Yeah.

(exhales) Hm.

-CICERO: Okay.
-Okay.

Hey, um, if you were
to have kids all over again,

what would you do?

Oh, honey,
I wouldn't have 'em.

SUGAR: Alright.

CICERO:
You know, Nat, I'd, um...

What would I do?

I would... I...
I’d want them to be

not so f*ckin'
afraid of things, you know?

I'd protect them less.
Yeah.

I'd want 'em to have more fun.
Make more mistakes.

Get into more f*ckin' trouble,
you know?

I don't know
how to do it, but...

but that, that's what I'd do.

Ma-make sense?

Yeah.

Thanks, Unc.

(sighs)

-Neil.
-FAK: Yes, Chef.

-May I borrow a Phillips-head?
-FAK: Yeah.

RICHIE:
Okay, all new hires
out front, please.

How long ago
is that photo from?

EBRA:
Five years. Block party.

FAK: Why is it burnt?

Because Michael was on dr*gs.

♪ ♪

What the f*ck?
Jewish lightning!

SYDNEY:
Neil, you can't say that!

-I didn't.
-SYDNEY: Yes, you did,
I heard you.

-Well...
-SYDNEY: Well, what?

So you guys as new hires,

you gotta know we wanna do
serious business here.

And in order to do that,
this has to be a serious place.

FAK:
Richie, Richie, Richie!

-Jewish lightning.
-Don't say that.

-Jewish lightning.
-Don't say that!

-Well... Yeah.
-Go over there.

Uh, I'll tell you what, g*ng,
let's just take a quick break

while I go address this, um,
problematic individual.

Thanks so much, guys.

-Neil Geoff. What?
-Yeah.

He did try to
burn down the restaurant
for insurance money.

-RICHIE: Yeah, I know.
-Yeah.

He overrode the system.

Start from the beginning.

He tried to burn down
the restaurant.

I think that he overrode
the fire suppression system

so the gas wouldn't turn off

and it wouldn't
put the fire out.

Make it so.

-Yeah!
-Good job.

-I know. Thank you.
-Now go.

FAK: Okay. Okay.

-Good job.
-FAK: Yeah.

(Carmy sighs)

What are you guys doing?

SUGAR:
Just staring at some stuff.

(buzzer buzzes)

Fire suppression.

(quietly) Okay.

Suppression
seems to be working.

I will now check the gas line.

♪ ♪

And ten...

nine...

(clock ticking)

EXAMINER: ...eight...

You’re good, you’re good.
You’re okay.

♪ ♪

EXAMINER: ...seven...

MIKEY:
He's learnin'! Yes.

(ticking continues)

TINA:
I'm grateful for
all y’all mothafuckas.

EXAMINER: ...six...

TIFF: You're gonna be
such a cute dad.

EXAMINER: ...five...

(balloon popping)

EXAMINER: ...four...

(ticking continues)

Keep going.

EXAMINER: ...three...

(ticking continues)

EXAMINER: ...two...

Says here
the chief operating officer is

Natalie Berzatto.

Correct. I am Natalie Berzatto.

Congrats, Natalie Berzatto.

You have a restaurant.

(cheering)

f*ck, yeah!

(laughter)

You're honestly the best.
You gotta come in.

You gotta come in.

SYDNEY: Whoo!

♪ I will come to you
in the daytime ♪

♪ I will raise you
from your sleep ♪

♪ I will kiss you
in four places ♪

♪ As I go runnin'
down your street ♪

♪ I will squeeze
the life right out of you ♪

♪ You will make me laugh
and make me cry ♪

♪ And though we try
to forget it ♪

♪ You will make me
call your name ♪

♪ As I shout it
to the blue, summer sky ♪

♪ And we may
never meet again ♪

♪ So shed your skin
let's get started ♪

♪ And you will throw ♪

♪ Your arms around me ♪

RICHIE:
Hey, 'cuz.

What do you think?

-Yeah. It's beautiful.
-RICHIE: Thanks.

Yo, you got a second to help
with the lighting levels?

Yes. Yeah, just give me,
um, one minute, okay?

I just, um...

I gotta call my girlfriend.

♪ ♪

♪ I have dreamed
of you in the daytime ♪

♪ And I have watched you
in your sleep ♪

♪ I met you in high places ♪

♪ Touched your head
and touched your feet ♪

♪ And though I disappear
from out of you ♪

ANNOUNCER (over phone)
They need a miracle.

♪ And though
I try to forget it ♪

♪ You will make me
call your name ♪

♪ As I shout it
to the blue, summer sky ♪

♪ And we may
never meet again ♪

♪ So shed your skin
let's get started ♪

♪ And you will throw ♪

♪ Your arms around me ♪

♪ And you will throw ♪

♪ Your arms around me ♪

(vocalizing)

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪

(vocalizing)

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Hey ♪

(vocalizing)