03x24 - Dads, Daughters, Different Drummers

[bunniefuu]

- Dad likes David best.

- Nope, it's Nicholas.

Oh, come on, Tommy.

Open your eyes.

It's David.

You're still far off-target.

I can't believe it.

What's off-target?

Hey, what are you guys

fighting about?

Well, there's no fight,

we're just trying

to decide on dad's favorite.

- That's easy, it's vanilla.

- Vanilla?

Yeah, and in baseball

it's between the A's

and the Phillies.

No, Nicholas,

what we're talkin' about

is dad's favorite child.

I said it was you.

No, it's David.

- See, Tommy.

- David?

Yeah, he had David first,

didn't he?

And would he like me best

and let David be oldest?

It's David.

No, I don't think so, Nicholas.

Nicholas, after all the times

that I have told you

'not to leave your

bicycle on the driveway'

why did I just

almost run over it?

Sorry, dad.

Go put it in the garage

where it belongs

'and while you're out there'

'take your skateboard

off the front porch.'

And as long as

you're on your feet

you might as well

take out the thrash.

[instrumental music]

You're right, Tommy.

Dad does like me best.

[theme song]

♪ There's a magic in the

early morning we found ♪

♪ When the sunrise smiles ♪

♪ On everything around ♪

♪ It's a portrait

of the happiness ♪

♪ That we feel and always will ♪

♪ For eight is enough ♪

♪ To fill our lives with love ♪

♪ Oh we spend our days ♪

♪ Like bright

and shiny new dimes ♪

♪ If we're ever puzzled ♪

♪ By the changing times ♪

♪ There's a plate

of homemade wishes ♪

♪ On the kitchen windowsill ♪

♪ And eight is enough ♪

♪ To fill our lives with love ♪♪

[instrumental music]

[car horn honking]

(Susan)

'Hi. Hotshot.'

Well, how's it look?

(Abby)

'I thought you said

you were gonna get'

'a sign painted on your office.'

But this is my office.

Oh, boy.

That's magnificent, David.

Um, do we still

call you David

or state license number

------?

- Just call me boss.

- Boss of what?

Myself, Nicholas.

Myself, see.

David, this is terrific.

We're really happy for you.

I'm envious.

No job hunting.

No getting fired.

No money coming in.

Oh, Susan, I hate to deprive you

of your pessimism

but I already

have my first customer.

Now that's what I call

enterprising.

No, that's desperation.

The apartment job I had

with Western Construction

is all over with,

and they ran out of work.

It was either start my own

company or be unemployed.

But some of the greatest tycoons

started just this way.

Let's hear it for the first one

in the Bradford family.

[cheering]

Dad..

...are you really happy that

David's gonna boss himself?

'Oh, yes. Very happy.'

It's something he's wanted it

for a long time.

Oh, well, then you weren't just

smiling to make him feel good?

Oh, no. Why?

Well, I didn't wanna bother you

if you were just smiling

to make him feel good.

No, no, no,

you weren't bothering me.

Well, I think I will,

when I give you this.

What is it?

It's a note from Mrs. Walker.

I think she wants to see you.

Really?

What about?

Well..

...the way she talked

I think

you're ruining my future.

Ruining your future?

Dad, you talk to Mrs. Walker.

It's out of my hands.

Nicholas!

Oh, dad.

Dad, look what

"The Independent" says.

Oh, Joannie,

I thought that we had a deal.

If you have to read

that fish wrapper

you need to do it outside,

next to the garbage can.

I don't ever wanna see

this thing inside my house.

Just because we're always

scooping "The Register."

They have never

scooped "The Register."

Oh, really? Well, I think

you better read this review.

Your drama critic

didn't even come to our show.

"The Weekly Independent"

gave us a whole column

and they gave me

four whole adjectives.

- Really?

- Look, yes, see.

They say, I'm discerning

inventive,

and technically proficient.

Hmm, that's three adjectives

and one adverb

but it is a wonderful thing.

Well, gosh,

finally they're hiring

somebody with intelligence.

Yeah, the-the reviewer's name

is Charles Alistair Gibson.

- Do you know him?

- No.

No, I can't say that

I ever heard of him

but I'll tell you one thing,

I could tell that this man

definitely knows

fine acting when he sees it.

Not just fine acting.

Discerning, inventive

and technically proficient.

Why would such a good writer

write for such a bad paper?

- You really think he's good?

- Oh, yes.

I mean, if I were

reviewing your performance

I would use

three better adjectives

and a superior adverb.

Oh, thanks, dad.

But this man's not my father,

and, and he doesn't have

to say these things about me.

You know, it's..

Listen, do you think I should

express my appreciation?

Hmm, I'd say that was

discerning, inventive

and technically proficient.

Oh, speaking of performances

I am going to get those tickets

for "The Mikado" tomorrow.

- Huh?

- "The Mikado."

You know, our annual visit to

the Gilbert and Sullivan orgy.

You and I every year.

Right, dad, right, of course.

I forgot, sorry.

- Uh, can I have the review?

- Yeah.

- Thanks. There you go.

- Thanks.

- Charles Alistair Gibson?

- Yes.

I never heard of him.

- But he's a drama critic.

- Drama critic?

We don't have a drama critic.

Oh, you mean the guy

who, uh, freelances?

Our local, uh, artsy stuff?

Uh, Charlie, what's his name?

Alistair Gibson.

May I speak to him, please?

He's not here.

He, uh, works out of his

apartment, as I recall.

Oh.

Um, do you have a telephone?

I guess not.

He never left me a number.

[sighs]

Oh. Um..

Well, can I leave him a message?

Sure, sure.

Here, leave a message.

I, uh, I can't promise you

I'll get it

but leave it anyway.

Oh.

[chuckles]

You, uh, you a bill collector?

- No, I'm an actress.

- An actress?

[laughs]

Sure you are, honey.

Until that

big break comes along

you're a bill collector, right?

[chuckles]

Right.

Oh, uh, Mrs. Walker?

Yes.

Hello,

I'm Nicholas Bradford's father.

Uh, you-you gave him this note,

you wanted to-to see me?

Oh, yes, of course,

Mr. Bradford.

I appreciate

you're being so prompt.

Actually I'm ten minutes early.

I've been walking

around this school yard

waiting for the

o'clock bell to ring

but I got so nervous

I-I just had to come in

and find out.

What's wrong with Nicholas?

- Nothing, Mr. Bradford.

- Nothing?

Oh, then it is my fault.

What have I done?

It's what you haven't done,

Mr. Bradford.

'And what I haven't done.'

'We are both to blame.'

To blame?

For what?

Totally ignoring

Nicholas's exceptional

musical aptitude.

Nicholas is musical?

He scored in the th percentile

in the schoolwide test

conducted by our

visiting music teacher.

Amazing.

I, I don't think I ever even

heard him hum.

A th percentile talent

deserves total encouragement.

Mr. Bradford..

...would you be willing

to encourage Nicholas

by renting an instrument

and arranging lessons?

Willing?

Oh, I'd be overjoyed.

[chuckles]

I, I thought

you were gonna put Nicholas

back into the third grade.

What instrument

do you recommend?

Oh, a budding talent

in the th percentile

should have any instrument

he chooses.

Oh, boy.

How, ahem, how could you give

a nine year old

the power of choice

without retaining

the power of veto?

You don't understand.

Nicholas is in

the th percentile.

Oh. Well, don't ask me what

percentile I'd put you into.

- Charles Alistair who?

- Gibson.

Oh, come on in.

I'll tell Joannie you're here.

Oh, I-I'll tell her, Elizabeth.

- Hi.

- Hi.

(Abby)

'If you really wanna be

nice to him'

let him wait outside.

So I figured

if you are nice enough

to thank me for the review,

the least I could do is

thank you for thanking me.

Oh, how could I help,

but thank you.

I mean,

your writing was so, uh..

It had so much insight in it.

It was so sensitive.

No, I wish somebody would say

that about my real writing.

You..

Why, don't you think

drama criticism is real?

I think poetry is more real.

- Poetry?

- Poetry.

Do you know Hasi-Al-Qatar?

- 'He's Syrian.'

- He's universal.

Someday I could write

only half as well.

No.

I bet someone will say that

about you someday.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

I just don't understand.

I mean, how can they give you

a contract one day and then

take it away the next?

Oh, it's not their fault,

until this zoning hassle

gets straightened out,

they can't break ground.

Well, how long would that take?

Well, you know better

than I would.

- It's going to court.

- Oh.

Well, that's a minimum

of eight months

and a maximum of two years.

Any chance that your

old company would hire you back?

Well, they are in the same boat.

I guess they'll just have

to hustle up another contract.

Well, at least

we have my salary.

Correction.

You have your salary.

Well, I don't mind sharing it,

David.

I do.

You know our arrangement.

You said yourself that

the construction business

was very tight.

So, I'll hustle harder.

Chauvinist.

No, tycoon.

[chuckles]

Unemployed tycoon.

Um, dad, I think

Charles would like

another slice of roast beef.

Oh, oh, yes, of course.

Of course.

- That's a third.

- Uh, who's counting?

- Me and dad.

- Nicholas, please. Eat.

What's left.

Well, tell me, Charles,

have you ever considered

'applying for work

at a real newspaper?'

Why, Tom, are you

leaving "The Register"

and become a diplomat?

Oh, no, I didn't mean

that to sound undiplomatic.

I-I meant it as a compliment.

'We're always looking

for bright young writers.'

Well, the truth is,

Mr. Bradford

I've considered it.

You see, Abby.

He has considered it.

And I've decided that I'm too

young to prost*tute myself.

To what?

- Oh, he said that--

- Nicholas, go play your drums.

What I mean is, until I can give

serious writing a real try

I don't wanna

sell it for easy hackwork.

Now wait a minute.

Journalism is not easy hack--

Dad, um, I think we ought to let

Charles enjoy his dinner.

If you think I can chew

with my foot in my mouth.

[both chuckling]

They only went for a coffee.

How come I get this feeling that

you so completely disapprove?

Oh, come on now, Abby.

Who am I to disapprove?

I'm just a hack journalist,

remember?

You heard Mr. Wonderful.

[sighs]

(Tom)

'Nicholas!'

Nicholas!

Nicholas!

Nicholas, hi.

David would like to

hear you play all morning

but we have to talk.

Oh, well you go ahead and talk,

dad.

You won't bother me.

Nicholas!

'You know those places

in between the notes'

'where you have to pause?'

Yeah.

Practice those outside

in your little playhouse.

[Tom sighs]

Wow.

Well, now we don't have

to converse in sign language.

Dad, there is really nothing

to talk about.

I'm sorry, Janet mentioned

my problem to Mary.

Don't worry, I'll find another

contracts to bid on.

'Oh, well,

I admire your attitude.'

Knock a Bradford down and they

bounce right back up again.

But of course sometimes

it's good to bounce back up

into the realm of practicality.

I mean, uh, we all know that

there's a long time gap between

bidding on a job

and actually doing the work.

True,

but what can I do about it?

'Well, I thought that

you might consider doing a job'

'for a client where

there is no bidding involved.'

You know where the client

knows you're working.

He's anxious for you to start

work this very afternoon.

Now, who has bounced clear pass

practicality?

Dad, that's impossible.

Oh, I don't think

renovating this living room

and the entryway is impossible.

- Renovating what?

- Come on.

Let's face it.

The work has to be done.

I'm gonna have to hire somebody.

Now that you have a license

and you're available

'why not you?'

Dad, I don't need your charity.

Please, this is not charity.

This is shrewd bargaining.

I'm taking advantage of you

while business is slow.

Actually it's stopped

before it started.

I don't wanna

hear your problems.

Just do my work

in the time we set

and at the price we negotiate.

- You're really serious?

- Oh, yes. Serious?

Oh-ho,

I'm demanding and heartless.

I will be the fussiest customer

you've ever had.

Well, in that case,

we better draw up a contract.

Very good. I'll have my lawyer

call your lawyer.

My lawyer is Janet.

That'll make it easy.

So is mine.

"The curtain opened

revealing you.

"Sweet velvet curtain

I did not know..

...my life would open to."

[instrumental music]

Thank you.

And you like it?

Yes, I love it.

It..

It's the most beautiful thing

I've ever read.

As good as all the other poems

men write about you?

[chuckles]

It's the only poem

anyone's ever written about me.

Unh-unh. I've got four more

in my notebook

but they're not ready

to choke you yet.

You do?

I thought you said

you had a writer's block.

It was cured by meeting you.

Really?

Really, Joannie.

[music continues]

[chuckles]

- I hope you keep writing.

- I will.

You've taken my mind off

all my problems.

Oh, problems with?

Nothing that an independent

income wouldn't cure

but then whoever heard

of a rich poet.

Oh, really?

I mean, Hasi-Al-Qatar

d*ed of pauper.

Now figure it this way.

Some men enrich the world.

Lesser men enrich themselves.

Exactly.

Dad! No!

You can't do this to me.

Don't worry, Tommy.

I'll only play

on my side of the room.

Yeah, and I'll go deaf on mine.

I'm sorry, Tommy.

There's no alternative.

David needs it as clear as

possible downstairs.

Yeah, but-but, dad,

how will I sleep?

How will I study?

Look, if Nicholas' drums

make you worry

that much about studying

we should have moved them

in here ten years ago.

[telephone rings]

I'll get it.

I can't find it.

Use the kitchen phone, alright?

[ringing continues]

I can't get there.

Look, if it's important,

they'll call back.

It's not important,

it's crucial.

Dad's phone.

(Elizabeth)

'Oh, no.

He'll never call again.'

I really admire you

for that, Charles.

I've always dreamed about

just talking off

and really seeing life.

Guess I've never had the courage

to do it by myself.

Maybe what you need is

an experienced guy.

Maybe.

[laughs]

- I could do it.

- Maybe.

[both laugh]

Joannie, guess what?

I've got good news.

- Hello, Charles?

- Mr. Bradford.

(Joannie)

'Well, what's happening?'

I was able to get reservations

for the Riverview tomorrow night

'and if we get there

at o'clock sharp'

you could have that Veal Oscar

that you love so much

without missing a single note

of the overture.

Oh, dad, that was nice

but you wouldn't have to do

that. It's kind of expensive.

It's not part of the tradition.

Oh, well, even traditions

could be improved

and what better way

to improve "The Mikado"

'than with Veal Oscar?'

Gilbert and Sullivan.

Yeah. Are you a fan too?

- Not really.

- 'Oh'

'Well, it's a rare taste,

Charles.'

In fact, in the

entire Bradford clan

Joannie and I are the only ones

that share the enthusiasm.

'We've been going ever since

she was years old.'

A couple of times,

we had to drive all the way

to San Francisco

to catch their performance.

[chuckles]

Yeah, it's, it's been nice, dad,

really. It..

But, um, don't you think

I've outgrown a little? I mean..

Oh, come on. Nobody outgrows

Gilbert and Sullivan.

Goodnight, Charles.

Nice to see you.

He's staying for dinner.

Oh.

(Abby)

'No, Tom, it has not been

four nights in a row'

'it's only been three,

and it's only dinner.'

(Tom)

'Exactly. It's only dinner.'

- Why can't Joannie see that?

- S-see what?

Well, don't you see,

that Charles is just like those

stray cats that Joannie

used to bring home.

They're not after her affection.

They're after my groceries.

Tom, that's ridiculous.

No, no, Abby, I understand

my daughter very well.

She's warm, she's sympathetic

and she's very maternal.

In short, she's a sucker

for every hard luck stray

that wants to play

on her sympathy.

And you think

Charles is doing that?

I do. I mean, why else would a

girl of Joannie's caliber

even get involved

with an unemployed

unmannered, unmedicated--

'Well, I, I don't know.'

I-I think

that's a little unfair.

Oh, really?

You'll see, you'll see.

'I don't know, Tom.'

I also think

I understand Joannie.

I think she's very bright

and I think she's very tuned

into people's feelings

and quite frankly, Tom,

I'm a lot more concerned

about what's going on in your

head right now than Joannie's.

I'm fine!

We'll see, Tom.

We'll see.

Come on, Elizabeth.

Susan,

it's Joannie's turn to dry.

Oh, I should do the same

for you someday, so now.

When you're in love.

How could she be in love?

She just met the guy.

So she's not in love,

she's just infatuated

but she still shouldn't

have to dry the dishes

and tremble at the same time.

Okay. Okay.

Hey, do you really think

she's that stuck on Charles?

All I know, Elizabeth, is that

I've watched Joannie

since she first discovered

the opposite gender.

And I've never seen her like

any boy so much and so fast.

(all)

Hmm-hmm.

Hold it, dad, um..

Unless you like

obstacle courses

I would suggest that

you use the back door.

Yeah, David's half

as good at renovating

as he is in messing up,

he should make a fortune.

Oh, well,

thanks for reminding me.

I'd hate to get trapped on my

own hallway on such a big night.

(Susan)

'A big night, what?'

Yes, "The Mikado."

Joannie and I have been

'looking forward to this

for almost a year.'

- That's tonight.

- It sure is.

Um, dad, I think we better

tell you something.

Can't it wait, Mary?

I'm kind of pressed for time.

- And I've gotta get Joannie.

- Dad, Joannie's not home.

No, she's got to be.

Um, no, she left about an hour

ago with Charles.

Charles? Well, he better

get her back here

in the next five minutes,

we're very late.

(Susan)

'Well, dad,

I wouldn't count on her.'

She said she wouldn't

be home till :.

He had an important book

to show at the library.

The library?

Look, dad, if we'd known

about your special evening

we would've reminded her.

I'm sure she just forgot.

How could she forget?

We just talked

about it yesterday.

Dad, Joannie hasn't been

able to concentrate

on anything lately

except Charles.

Then, why didn't

Charles remind her?

He's supposed to be the genius.

- Dad.

- Aah.

[sighs]

[instrumental music]

Are you sure you're alright?

If you wanna miss class,

it's okay with me

but don't use me as an excuse.

Well, I mean, you could see

"The Mikado" tomorrow night.

No.

[sighs]

Nicholas!

I can't hear you!

I wonder why!

Come on. Practice is over.

I know.

I'm just doing this for fun.

Well, it's no fun

for the rest of us.

You'll have to knock it off

until morning.

Okay. Okay.

[sighs]

Hey!

I gotta finish this song,

don't I?

Finish it someplace else.

Okay, okay.

[sighs]

[sighs]

[Joannie murmuring]

- 'No, Joannie.'

- 'No, I want you to.'

(Charles)

'I'm not gonna take your money.'

(Joannie)

Shh.

See, it's okay.

That's $.

And I'll try to get more.

(Charles)

'I really, really don't like

taking this.'

(Joannie)

'Oh, don't be silly. Take it.'

I wanna help.

Dad, can I ask you a question?

Oh, well, you already did.

Now, is the next question

easy or harder?

Harder. How come Joannie asked

to pay Charles to kiss her?

What?

Well, Charles kissed Joannie,

and Joannie gave Charles $.

- When?

- Just now, downstairs.

You wait right here.

Joannie!

[door closes]

'Joannie!'

Just a minute.

- Yeah, dad, what is it?

- I wanna talk to you.

In private!

You know, it's bad enough

that that Charles

lured you away

from our Mikado date, but now--

Oh, "The Mikado."

Dad, I forgot--

But now you gave him money.

Why? Why?

(Joannie)

'I don't think

that's any of your business.'

Can't you see that

he's just a leech?

- Dad!

- I don't like him.

I don't trust him.

I want him out of this house.

And I want him out of your life.

You don't mean that.

- That's exactly what I mean.

- Da..

Where do you think you're going?

- To Charles.

- What do you mean?

Did you hear me?

Stop right there!

- It's alright, Joannie.

- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I don't wanna cause

any problems.

I'm leaving.

Please, be my guest.

[dramatic music]

I'll never talk to you again.

Ever!

[dramatic music]

Oh, I'm sorry, I..

Guess I'm keeping

you awake, huh?

Oh, no, how can you say that?

Ah.

I should have thrown that

Charles out of the house

the first night, none of this

would have even happened.

No, if you had thrown

Charles out the first night

all of this

still would have happened.

It's just that Joannie would

have stopped speaking to you

a few days earlier, that's all.

Doesn't she realize,

I'm only trying to protect her.

[yawning]

Tom, it's her money.

She can do

what she wants to with it

and how do you know that

Charles won't pay her back?

Oh-ho-ho.

Fat chance. I know his type.

I mean, no man

with any self-respect

would allow themselves

to sponge over woman

and take advantage

of her generous impulses

and romantic nature.

Oh, yeah, then how come

you still owe me cents

from those triple-scooped

ice cream cones

the other night

at the restaurant

'when you didn't

remember your wallet?'

Alright, I'll pay you back

right now.

'No, no, no.

I was just teasing.'

Don't you understand,

I'm just trying to help you

get this into

a proper perspective.

Tom, do you realize

that my father

still thinks of you as,

as an irresponsible

'middle-aged adolescent'

'who makes his living

in a very shady profession?'

That has nothing to do

with Joannie and Charles.

Yes, it has everything

to do with Joannie and Charles.

Tom, every father

thinks that there is no man

who is good enough

for his daughter.

Right. Well, in this case,

this father happens to be right.

I mean, he didn't like Charles

from the minute they met.

He didn't even

give him a chance.

Oh, Joannie, I'll admit

that dad didn't take

to Charles in the beginning

but you have to admit

that Charles didn't

exactly try to make

a good impression.

Of course not.

He's no hypocrite.

I guess not.

Who lends hypocrite bucks?

[sighs]

I told Charles that he didn't

have to consider it alone.

Joannie, you gave

Charles the money?

Oh, Susan

they were going to kick him out

of his apartment.

I mean, it's not his fault

that he's broke

he can't work at some,

some menial job.

He wouldn't have time to,

to do his real work

to perfect his talent.

[Susan scoffs]

'Oh, really?'

Well, how come Mary works

at a menial job

while she's trying

to perfect med school.

How come I work

at the daycare center

while I try

to perfect college, huh?

It is totally different.

Charles is an artist.

Yeah, he's an artist, alright

at convincing you

he shouldn't work.

(Nicholas)

'Oh, hi, dad. Glad I found you

before you left.'

(Tom)

What is it, Nicholas?

Well, I just learnt my first

real song, you wanna hear it?

Oh, uh, no, not right now.

I have a headache.

But it's your favorite.

"Rudolph

The Red Nosed Reindeer."

Tonight, Nicholas.

Maybe tonight.

What about you, Mary?

Mm, sure, Nicholas,

I'd be glad to listen

but, uh, you have

to tell me something first.

What?

Well, I'm not an expert

on drum playing.

You know that, but

I was wondering

how do you know for sure that

you're playing "Rudolph

The Red Nosed Reindeer"

and not some other song?

Well, you like

the "Star-Spangled Banner?"

Yeah.

Hmm.

Can you ask me that question

after I had my other lesson?

Well, that's the best news

I've had in the last four days.

(David)

'Thanks, dad, but I haven't

told you all of it.'

The only reason

I got the job is because

they're five weeks behind

and I have to start today.

Well, if those are the terms,

then those are the terms.

No,

I don't think you understand.

You see, I have to pull

my helpers off this job here

and, uh, put them on the

contract that just came through.

Oh, I see.

Then-then you'll have to hire

new helpers for this job.

Yeah, if I can find some.

But don't worry,

I guarantee you

that this job will be finished

just as we agreed.

And tonight, in fact, I'm gonna

come here all by myself

and do all the work

that was scheduled for today.

- By yourself?

- Sure.

Oh, now..

Wait a minute.

After doing a full day's work

on the new job?

Please, dad,

this is not your problem.

We made an agreement, I'm gonna

make sure that it's met.

Yeah, but I'm not so sure

that I want you

burning yourself out.

I mean, I can always

extend the deadline.

No, dad. Look, I can handle it.

Listen, you taught us to always

meet our obligations, right?

And I don't want the David

Bradford Construction Company

to fail in its first assignment.

Alright, David,

if that's the way you want it.

I couldn't be more proud.

- That is no big deal.

- Yes, it is a big deal.

I'm glad someone around here

remembers what I taught them.

[chuckles]

[telephone ringing]

I'll get it.

Hello?

Um, just a second.

Um, is Joannie still here?

Why? Who's calling?

Um, I-I don't know,

they didn't say.

Well, ask.

Who's calling, please?

- It's Charles.

- Hang up.

- But, dad..

- Hang up.

There will be no more calls

in this house from that person.

Is that clear?

[instrumental music]

Good morning, Joannie.

Morning, Tommy.

Morning, Elizabeth.

Morning, Joannie.

[music continues]

My, my,

it's chilly this morning.

Freezing.

(Mary)

'Hey, friend. It's : a.m.

Time for lunch break.'

(David)

There's more work here

than I thought.

Then hire an extra helper

for tomorrow night.

I can't find anybody

who's willing to work nights

at this hour and pay.

- No helpers.

- No helpers.

Well, then ask dad

for more time.

No, I can't.

I'd feel like a failure.

Dad seems to be counting on me

to come through

like a dutiful son.

It must be his feud

with Joannie.

Dad had never feud

with Joannie.

Uh, believe me, David,

he's feuding.

They haven't spoken

since last night.

I can't believe that.

I mean, Joannie's dad's

special remembrance of mom.

She's named after mom.

She's like mom.

Yeah, that's probably

why it's so hard for him to..

...accept the fact that she's

going with someone he hates.

Oh, I get it,

the old Electra complex.

Actually, David, I think

dad's got good reason

to dislike Charles.

I mean, maybe

he did move too fast

but so did Joannie.

Well, I'd like to hear

the whole diagnosis

from the entire family.

But if I don't get back up

on this ladder

I will have more trouble

than I can handle

with my own love life.

David, don't tell me you

and Janet are having trouble.

No, I don't think so.

We're not together enough

to find out.

You know, when I leave here

to go home and take a shower

before my day job,

Janet will be gone.

When she comes home to take

a shower before going off

to law school,

I'll be here on my night job.

[clicks tongue]

Nice being your own boss,

isn't it?

- I love it.

- Goodnight.

Goodnight.

[sighs]

[instrumental music]

[Joannie yawning]

[moans]

[yawns]

[music continues]

(Mary)

'I'll be out in a minute.'

[door opens]

[door closes]

(Mary)

This whole thing

is ridiculous.

I mean, they're both

acting like six year olds.

Well, I think it's dad's fault.

Charles is probably

the most fascinating boy

Joannie's ever dated.

Are you crazy?

Charles is a creep.

Does a creep write poetry

to a woman he loves?

Oh, come on, Nancy, why

shouldn't Charles write poetry

I mean, all he's got to do is

stand in the unemployment line.

Yeah, that's a shrewd way to go.

Sure beats the Corvette

rat race.

I can't believe it.

I mean, who cares about Charles?

Our father and our sister

are not speaking to each other.

Well, dad is just gonna have to

get over it before the wedding.

- The wedding?

- Yeah, the wedding.

I can see it now,

it'll probably be outside

with a Renaissance theme,

and Charles will probably

write the ceremony himself.

Yeah, and I can play my drum.

Preferably while Charles

is reading his poetry.

Yeah, and dad's

having his heart att*ck.

Will you guys stop this, please?

This is not a joke.

Look, dad and Joannie

have both backed themselves

into very serious corners.

We can't just let 'em

stay there hurting each other.

- But how do we stop it?

- It's very simple.

If they won't talk, we better.

You're so naive, both of you.

If I let myself

talk to dad just once

I'd say things just as cruel

as he said about Charles.

Joannie, maybe if you really

talked to dad

you'd find out

he didn't mean those things.

Oh, he meant them, Susan.

He meant them to hurt him.

He thought he'd scare him away.

He doesn't know what kind

of person Charles really is.

Well, then maybe

you could tell him.

Oh, I'll tell him, alright..

...but I won't talk to him.

Joannie, that's impossible.

[scoffs]

Is it?

(Mary)

'One of you

has to break the ice.'

'At least hear

Joannie's side of the story.'

Oh, despite the fact

that she has totally

ignored my side of it?

Look, dad, you said

there are never just

two sides to any story.

That's a platitude.

Well, that's your platitude.

And I guess

you're stuck with it.

That's right, you live

by the fatherly advice

and you die

by the fatherly advice.

Alright, alright,

I guess we should back up

and start all over again.

[instrumental music]

Joannie...this is your father.

May I come in?

Joannie, please, let's talk.

Joannie?

I think they're empty, dad.

Empty?

Yeah, I saw Joannie

leaving with her suitcase

and I'll give you one guess

where she went.

[knock on door]

- Hi.

- Joannie.

- Oh.

- Hi.

- Oh, Charles.

- Oh.

I've been trying to call you

but they wouldn't

let me through.

I know. I know.

Well, is this where

the poet's tour leaves?

- What?

- You know, uh..

Big Sur, Kerouac's "Highways",

Whitman's "America."

They always said

you were the perfect guide.

I'm ready to be guided.

You serious?

This serious?

Maybe you better come in.

Maybe I better.

[instrumental music]

[sighs]

Donna, hold my calls.

No. Just two exceptions.

Abby and Joannie.

[music continues]

[sighs]

Mary, Elizabeth, come quick!

- What's wrong, Nicholas?

- How should I know?

You're the one that goes

to medical school. Come on!

[sighs]

I don't believe it.

- Poor David.

- Where am I?

When you start seeing again,

you might recognize

this is our living room floor.

Oh, no! What time is it?

It's about :.

Oh, no.

I'm late for my other job.

Well, David, look,

it'll keep for a while.

You need more sleep.

No, I can't have sleep.

My work is awaiting for me.

This is costing money.

Who cares if you sleep?

You're the boss.

Please, Nicholas,

don't remind me.

Oh, I'm afraid

it's not gonna work.

He'll probably blow

both contracts.

Well, we'll just have

to lend him a hand.

We can't.

David's pride is at stake.

He won't even know.

Oh, how can he not even know

we're helping him?

Because we'll do it

when he can't see us.

He'll see the work we did.

Elizabeth, are you kidding?

You saw how bleary-eyed he is.

He doesn't even know

where he left off.

And look,

when he comes in tonight

he'll just figure he got

more done than he remembered.

'You really think so?'

Will you stop arguing

and pick up the roller?

(Charles)

'Are you sure you really

wanna leave school?'

Quit the repertoire company

and just take off?

Well, we don't have to do it

right away, Charles.

I mean...we could

wait till June.

You know that poem you wrote

"All Roads Beckon Me

But Summer Roads Command."

[chuckles]

So what happens till June?

- We live here.

- Here?

Oh, well, we can get

a larger place if you want.

And what's your father

gonna say?

Don't worry about that.

I'm not gonna let him hurt

either one of us anymore.

Oh, I'm so sorry

for what he said about you.

'Consider the source, Joannie.'

Your father is old-fashioned,

middle class

and he thinks "The Mikado"

is high culture.

Oh, I know.

Oh, I know.

I don't know

how I stood it for so long.

Be careful, everybody.

Now, look, it has to look like

David did it himself.

Oh, yeah, and remember

dad also has to inspect it.

Okay, okay, I just wish

you would've consulted with me

before you rushed into this.

Oh, come on, Tommy,

don't you wanna help

save David's health, pride and

his new company, huh?

Well, sure, but I just think

we could have negotiated

for something better

than zero wages.

Hey, what's everybody doing?

Um, we're helping David,

Nicholas, but, uh

just pretend you never saw us

and it never happened.

- 'Yeah, it's a secret.'

- A secret, huh?

Yeah, and if you blab,

we're gonna renovate you.

I don't wanna blab,

I just wanna help.

Oh, sorry, Nicholas, this isn't

finger-painting time.

Yeah, you definitely have

to paint inside the lines.

But I'll be careful.

Why don't you find some other

way of, uh, helping?

I got it.

I can cheer you up

by playing my drums.

Uh...no,

on-on second thought, uh

why don't you help Tommy

and hold the ladder, okay?

Oh, boy. Hold the ladder.

Yeah. Oh, boy.

What's wrong?

I just wish I thought

more secure about this.

Secure?

I can't figure if you're here

because of your love for me

or your anger at your father.

Oh, Charles.

How can you say that, hmm?

I mean,

isn't this what you wanted?

I wanted the words, Joannie.

I wanted to write new poetry.

I didn't want you

standing in my dirty linoleum

telling me I'm gonna

have to worry

about feeding two people and

paying rent on a larger place.

Oh, I'll help you with that.

We'll do it together.

Even so, it's responsibility.

It's weight.

It's what men

like your father do.

I don't want a man like that.

Not at this moment maybe.

But that's what you should have.

- No.

- Yes, Joannie.

We had a beautiful first act,

you and I.

I wrote some verse

you spun some dreams.

But I'm just a bit clear.

I disappear before

the first act curtain

so that you can meet your hero.

No. No, I don't believe that.

Okay.

We'll talk about it later.

Later?

Sorry, sweet love,

I've gotta run.

Unemployment lines

wait for no man.

[instrumental music]

Donna, any calls?

Alright, if anybody does call,

I'll be home.

Because I couldn't work

if I tried.

[tires squealing]

[car horn honking]

No luck?

I, I.. "The Weekly Independent"

doesn't know where he lives.

I even went

by the police station

and they can't help us either.

Abby, I've lost her.

Why did I do it? Why did I say

those things to her?

Because she's your

special daughter

and because

you love her very much.

Sometimes that's not enough.

Come on.

- Hmm.

- What is this?

- What's going on here?

- Hi.

Dad, what are you doing here?

That's not the question.

Why are you all

working like this?

(Tommy)

'Dad, please, whatever you do'

don't blame David,

this is our idea.

Yeah, dad, we just

wanted to help David out.

All of us.

All of you?

All of us, daddy.

[instrumental music]

I, uh..

I would've missed you very much.

I hope that someday

you'll be able to forgive me.

[music continues]

I'll try, dad.

I never loved anyone

the way I loved Charles.

Loved?

Don't ask me what happened.

Alright.

If that's what you want.

You really hurt me, dad.

Because I, I didn't want

Charles to hurt you more.

In some ways,

you were right about him.

And in some ways..

...you were very wrong.

So was I.

[sighs]

Are you just gonna stand there

or you're gonna help David

like the rest of this family?

Alright.

Where should I start?

Wait.

You can start right here.

Beside me.

I'm impressed, David.

I'm really impressed.

I'm glad you like it, dad.

I think for the first first job

that David Bradford

Construction Company

ever did,

it's very professional.

- Except--

- Except, what?

Except this area right here,

where you left the roller marks.

Me?

Come on, dad, you can't

blame on Joannie, come on.

How did you know?

Well, because

you're a little too helpful.

I mean, one wall

I might've done in my sleep

but three walls

and two coats, never.

Alright, alright.

It was a good cause, and you can

thank your brothers and sisters.

I plan to. Everybody,

tomorrow night, party time.

- 'My treat.'

- Alright.

Yeah, I-I'll have food,

I'll have music.

Oh, good, I'm glad

you volunteered the music

before Nicholas volunteered

to play the drums.

Go ahead, laugh

but I'm not playing

the drums anymore.

- You're not?

- Nope.

Hey, that gives us

two reasons to celebrate.

Nicholas, I-I thought

you loved to play the drums.

I do, but I traded

for something better.

What did you trade for?

The tuba.

Tuba?

Yeah, dad. Listen.

Oh, boy.

Yeah.

Oh.

Abby, why didn't you

tell me about this?

- It's the first I've heard.

- Yeah, dad, it just happens.

Well, I can't allow this.

I'm gonna have to throw that

out of the house.

(Abby)

'Oh, no, wait a minute, Tom.'

Remember what happened

the last time

you said something like that.

Yeah, remember, dad?

I remember.

You're absolutely right.

This is absolutely different.

Nicholas.

[theme music]

[music continues]