01x10 - Paddington Cleans Up / Riding High / Paddington Dines Out

[bunniefuu]

-I'm paddington bear!

- Good morning, sir.
Have you ever stopped

To consider the importance
of brushes in your life?

-Brushes?
-There's hairbrushes,
paintbrushes, toilet brushes,

Toothbrushes, clothes brushes,
hard or soft bristles,

In an assortment of colours
and sizes, half price, one-time

Special offer,
just for you, sir.

-Thank you, that's very kind
of you. And it sounds like
very good value.

- Thank you, but we don't need
any brushes.

-Then how about some timepieces?

Or a necklace for
that beautiful neck?
-No, thank you. And good day!

You must be wary of door-to-door
salesmen, paddington.

You're too trusting.

You never get
something for nothing
in this world.

- I think door-to-door selling
sounds interesting.

I like the idea
of helping people.

- Then you'll enjoy fetching
the groceries.

Here's some money. Don't forget
to bring back the change.

-As I did mrs. Bird's shopping,

I thought about what she said,

That you can't get
something for nothing.

And I wasn't sure she was right.

After all, when the browns
found me at paddington station,

They took me in and didn't ask
for anything in return.

Some people might think that
mr. Gruber gives me cocoa
every day for nothing,

I always pay for the buns.

"Congratulations!
Your character,

Drive and ambition
is about to pay off.

You have been chosen for a
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Earn a fortune meeting
interesting people.

We will contact you soon."

A once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity! You don't get

One of those every
day of the week.

- "Earn a fortune meeting
interesting people."

Why, that sounds too good
to be true.

-Exactly, mr. Gruber.

That's why we're warning people

To be on the lookout
for this con artist.

He's pretending to be a vacuum
cleaner salesman,

But his vacuums are all broken.

You'd be surprised at the
number of people who actually
fall for this kind of thing.

-I can think of one myself.

-Oh!

- I'd like to earn a fortune
and meet interesting people.

The question is where? And when?

-Right here, and now.

Allow me

To introduce myself, mr...?

-Brown.

Paddington brown.
I'm from darkest peru.

-Oh! How exotic!

Well, I suppose
it takes all sorts.

Did you get my note?

-Uh... Oh yes. Thank you, but...

I... I seem to have lost it.

- No matter. Please
excuse my appearance,

But I've been busy all day
helping people clean up

And selling vacuum cleaners.
- Vacuum cleaners?

- Yes. And I am prepared to
make you a one-time offer

To join our happy band
of vacuum consultants.

Ask no questions and
I'll tell you no lies.

This new cleaner deals
with dirt,

Muck, ashes, soot,
anything you like.

Now it just so happens you have
caught me with my very last one.

But because you seem
a helpful sort of bear,

You get our latest
model cleaner,

This list of do's
and don'ts to help you

Make your very first sale and...

A free hat.

Now how much are you prepared
to pay for all of this?

- All I've got is
mrs. Bird's change.

- You don't get anything
for nothing these days.

- That's just what
mrs. Bird said.

-You'll be able to pay her
back out of the profits
from your first sale.

You'll see me again...

If I don't see you first.

- I could hardly believe
my good fortune,

And I was sure
mrs. Bird would change

Her opinion of door-to-door
salesmen when she heard.

I couldn't wait to get started.

The do's and don'ts booklet
had all the answers.

All I had to do was
find a likely customer.

-Are you spying on me, bear?

And what's that you got
on your head?

- Ask no questions and
I'll tell you no lies.

This new cleaner deals

With dirt, muck, ashes,
soot, anything you like.

How would you like a free
demonstration, mr. Curry?

-Hmm... Free, you say?

The price of chimney sweeps
these days is highway robbery.

- This cleaner is particularly
good with soot, mr. Curry.

- It had better be. I'll be right
back to keep an eye on things.

- Mr. Curry deserves
a good demonstration

Because I think he falls under
the heading of "extremely
difficult customers".

That's more like it.

But maybe he'll appreciate
an even bigger demonstration.

-Bear!!!

What is going on?

You're supposed to clean up,
not make more of a mess.

- Don't worry, mr. Curry. It's
all part of the demonstration.

You - insert customer name -

Will agree that no ordinary
cleaner could suck up this mess.

-For once in my life, bear,

We are in complete
and utter accord.

-Prepare to be amazed!

-Oh!

Bear, where are you?

What are you doing?

- I'm looking for a socket
to plug this in.

-Socket! I'll give you a socket!

I don't have electricity.
I use gas!

What was good enough for my
father is good enough for me.

- You had a father, mr. Curry?
- Aahhh!

This is an outrage.

Someone is going
to pay for this!

-Oh!

Oh! Thank goodness
it's you, mr. Brown.

-We were worried about you.

-Worried... About me?

-Someone has been selling
faulty vacuum cleaners
down at the market,

And I was worried something
might have happened to you.

-It did.

What
do you take me for?!

Once is bad enough, but
twice in the same morning?!

Police! Stop him! Stop him!

Stop that man!

Wait till I get my hands on him!

-Keep him away! He's crazy!

-Mr. Curry was such a hero
for breaking up the vacuum
cleaner racket

That he didn't mind
the mess I'd made.

-He got just what he deserved,

Trying to trick you into
cleaning his house for free.

I hope you've learned
your lesson, paddington.

-Oh yes, mrs. Bird.

People who expect something for
nothing usually end up with more
than they bargained for.

-Ha! Ha! Ha!

-Is this right, mr. Gruber?

- Be one with the horse,
mr. Brown.

- Be one with the horse?
But it's made of wood.

- My old friend stan miller will
explain the finer points

Of horse racing to you
when you meet him.

He's been trying to win
the kentucky derby

For years, and he hopes
this time, he'll do it.

That's why we're going
to the united states.

I want to include horse racing
in my book, the world and
its wonders.

- I think bears would make good
horse racers, mr. Gruber.

Oh!

-You mean... Jockeys, mr. Brown.

A horse racer is called
a jockey.

-Paddington, meet bettin' star,

A very powerful steed.

- Steed? But it looks
like a horse.

-Exactly, mr. Brown.

- And this 2-legged one
is my jockey, frankie.

-Oh!

I think bettin' star
likes marmalade.

- Well, don't you be
feeding any of that to her.

We don't want anything ruining
her chances of winning
the derby.

- I never thought that marmalade
could ruin anything...

Except mrs. Bird's tablecloth.

But that was a
very sticky chunk.

- The most important thing
in horse racing

Is that the rider and horse
communicate.

That brings out the fire
in the horse.

Oh... Hmm...

- I must say, stan, these
meringues are delicious.

Why don't you hurry and get one
before they're all gone,
mr. Brown?

- I'd never tasted
a meringue before...

Hmm! It looks like garlic.

Ugh! Yuck!

It's horrible. Yuck!

I hope some marmalade
will take the taste away.

- Phew! Something sure
smells ripe around here.

-Hey! My marmalade.

- I thought I said,
"no marmalade"?

I don't have time to play games.

I have a race to get ready for.

- Sorry, bettin' star.
You heard what frankie said.

-Yeow! Ah... Hoo!

My foot!

It's broken. I can't
ride like this.

What am I gonna do?

- Where is the jockey
for bettin' star?

- Here I am. I'm afraid
frankie's broken his foot.

- Get your gear and
step on the scale.

133?!

You're over the regulation.

- I'm overweight? It must have
been that meringue.

- Phew! I'd say it was
somethin' else.

But you have to lighten up or
bettin' star is out of the race.

- I had to think fast or
mr. Miller would be most upset.

-130. Check.

Okay, you jocks.

You got a race to ride.

- I wish I could remember
what mr. Miller said.

Something about how to bring
out the fire in a horse...

Mrs. Bird always blows
on her fires

When she wants
to get them going.

- Oh, dear! Where can
mr. Brown have got to?

I do hope he doesn't
miss the big race.

- Wow!! Frankie is
certainly getting

Bettin' star excited.
Look at her go!

-I'm afraid it can't be frankie.

It's... Mr. Brown!

-What?!

- My big chance and
you get stepped on.

Don't you have any horse sense?

- It was that bear and his
marmalade that did it.

- You should be thankful bettin'
star is in the race at all.

That bear, as you call him,
even gave up his boots to ride.

- Does he know how
to ride, mr. Gruber?

- He practiced a bit...
In my antique shop.

-This is terrible!

-It certainly is.

The browns promised to watch
the kentucky derby on television

And they'll be looking out
for mr. Brown.

They're in for quite a surprise.

-Paddington?!

-Yes. It's paddington all right!

-The saddle was very slippery,

So it was a good thing frankie
had given me back my marmalade.

Some people think it's only good

For eating.

Oh!

Suddenly... Everything
went quiet.

-Help!

- Look at him go!
- Ride, mr. Brown. Ride!

- Do you think we could
slow down just a little?

- Come on, paddington!
- That's it, paddington!

- That's my paddington!
- Come on, paddington!

-She's pulling away again!

- Whatever your bear is doing to
that horse, it sure is working.

He's doing what you told him:

He's communicating!

-Go, bettin' star. Go!

- That's it, paddington!
Come on!

- You can do it!
Come on, paddington!

-Hooray!

You did it, stan!

- The bear did it, and I can't
wait to thank him.

- You'll have to catch him first.
He's going around again.

- To think, mr. Brown. You ate
a whole head of garlic.

One clove would have been
bad enough, but a whole head!

It's no wonder
bettin' star ran so fast.

- Oh! I thought it was
a meringue.

-She must have got the full
force of the smell every time
you breathed out.

- This will make an excellent
chapter in my book,

The world and its wonders.

-I think you should eat some
garlic too, frankie, before
our next race.

- I can lend you some of
my marmalade, frankie.

It did help take the taste away
a little bit.

- Just as long as it doesn't get
rid of that winning aroma!

-It was my summer birthday,

And everything was
wonderful until...

Take a bath? I don't think
very much of that as a
birthday present.

-That's not the present
part. Going to dinner at
the porchester is the present.

Dad has invited mr. Gruber too.

-You want to look your best.

After all, the porchester
is a famous restaurant.

And it's very expensive.

Only the best people go there.

-Your chair, monsieur.

- And what would you like
for an hors d'oeuvre?

- Excuse me?

- Oh, paddington! You're in
for quite an experience.

The porchester is very
hoity-toity.

-Hors d'oeuvre? Hoity-toity?

It all sounded very complicated,

So I decided to seek
mr. Gruber's advice.

- I have never been to the
porchester either, mr. Brown.

It'll be a nice change
from cocoa and buns.

- That's what I'm worried about,
mr. Gruber.

I've never eaten in a
fancy restaurant before.

-There are many things to know.

For example, let us pretend
this is your hors d'oeuvre.

Now which fork would you use?

Aha, mr. Brown!

Start from the outside...

And work your way in.

-Start from the outside?

But how can I reach my food if
I'm not even in the restaurant?

-I think perhaps it's a good
thing you came to see me,
mr. Brown.

-Dear aunt lucy.

In case you're wondering why
there are a lot of smudges
on this card,

It's because I'm writing it
in the bath

So I'll be nice and clean
for our dinner out.

I thought it would be better
to have a bath after I'd eaten,

But mr. Gruber reminded me
that I must look my best
for the porchester.

-A party of browns.

We've booked a table near
the orchestra.

Is the young...
Bear gentleman with you?

-With us? We're with him.

- Oh. Then I'm afraid
you can't come in.

The young... Bear gentleman
isn't wearing the proper
evening dress.

- Bears don't have evening
dress. They have evening fur.

-And I've had a bath!

-But the... Hat?

- It was given to me by my uncle
in darkest peru.

I'm never without it.

-Oh. Very well.

We'll make an exception.

This way, please.

Monsieur.

-Thank you.

Ah! My menu's full of mistakes.

- Mistakes? There is never a
mistake on a porchester menu.

-Those aren't mistakes,
paddington. It's written
in french.

- And we pride ourselves
in the fact

That there is nothing one cannot
obtain at the porchester.

- Well in that case, I'll have
a marmalade sandwich, please.

With custard,
since it's my birthday.

- A marmalade sandwich
with custard?

For dinner?

-I like marmalade.

And you said that one could
obtain anything I want.

-Excuse me, andre.

I'd like a marmalade
sandwich as well.

It'll make a nice change.

Thank you, andre.

-As you wish, monsieur.

Incroyable!

Suddenly, everyone is wanting
"ze" marmalade sandwich?!

- I bring paddington to one
of the finest restaurants

And he wants a marmalade
sandwich. Oh!

- Perhaps you would care for an
hors d'oeuvre while you wait?

- Hors d'oeuvre? But
that looks like salad.

-Indeed.

- Thank you. It looks like
a very good bargain.

And I know which fork to use.

- It isn't all for you,
paddington.

- And you're not meant to eat it
from the trolley.

- I thought dining out
was supposed to be fun,

But there are an awful
lot of things you can't do.

Oh!

Ah!

Couldn't I have my water
in a glass, please?

- That's not for drinking.
It's a paw bowl.

- A paw bowl? But I had
a bath this afternoon.

-Ahem! Since the young
bear gentleman is having
a marmalade sandwich,

I assumed his paws
might get sticky.

- Ah! There's no "might"
about it!

-Where is paddington?

- He said something
about finding his onion.

-I think I know where it went.

- Well, don't tell paddington.
He'll only want it back.

-Ah, my omelette flambee!

You don't want to miss
this, mr. Brown.

My omelette is on fire.

- Ah! Don't worry, mr. Gruber.
I'm coming.

-Oh! My omelette!

-I've got my onion back!

-Ah!

-This was your idea, henry.

-Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

- I'm afraid I must
ask you to leave.

Throwing water over the food,
onions in the clarinet,

Ordering marmalade sandwiches...

You'll give the porchester
a bad name...
-Nonsense!

May I remind you that I ordered
a marmalade sandwich too?

And I'm still waiting.
- I asked for custard on mine.

- I think I shall ask
for some as well.

-Huh?

-If that bear goes, we all go.

- Hear, hear!
- Ha! Ha! Ha!

- Custard on both sandwiches
it shall be.

- Allow me to introduce myself.
I am sir huntley martin...

The marmalade king.

Been in marmalade
for 50 years...

- Fancy being in marmalade
for 50 years.

- Been dining here
for over 30 of 'em,

And I've never seen anyone
have so much fun.
-Ha! Ha! Ha!

- Paddington usually has fun
wherever he goes.

-I was a bit worried about
coming to a famous restaurant
like the porchester,

But luckily mr. Gruber showed me
exactly how to behave.

-Oh!

Uh... Ahem! No need
to thank me, mr. Brown...

No need at all.

-Two marmalade sandwiches...

With custard.

- Thank you very much.
I think I shall always

Come here to celebrate
my birthday in the future.

And I think I may need
that paw bowl after all.

- I'll have one of those.
- Oh, waiter!

I'd like a
marmalade sandwich too.
-Over here too, please!