springtime a time of pretty flowers
buzzing bees chirping birdies
and oh yeah one more thing
a deadly disease that moves with face
kicking speed contaminating everything
in its path
including our town
wells fargo
adults call it spring fever
they say it's harmless but we've seen
what it can do
and the strain that hit this year
was the mushiest one ever
[Music]
the love sickness struck without warning
turning its victims into pathetic
drooling slush hogs
and as the body count kept climbing
nona and i began to wonder
how long could we hold out
[Music]
have you picked me
[Music]
me
[Music]
there's no way to know
when the fever will hit
or how deadly the outbreak will be
[Music]
all we can do is keep our eyes open from
warning signs
like this not curdling face
a sure sign that my brother pete had
been turned into a sap sucking love
doofus
Warning Signs
[Music]
another warning sign is neighborhood
mutants sporting some tattoos of love
compliments of me and my friend mr
sunshine
[Music]
yucco
The Letter
to make extra sure we were still immune
nona and i had to have special emergency
checkups
blood pressure
hunky dory now let's check your reflexes
ready love
but
i can't hear you
[Music]
love
bite
you're healthier than a hound dog
contamination alert
it was mail carrier eunice puel
she didn't just carry letters in her bag
she carried the fever
morning pete nona
beautiful day isn't it if you like
sunshine and if you love the friendly
buzzing of mr b
hi there mr b
and the birds singing their little
chirpity chirp chirp
it's spring
and that means love is in the air
love is
everywhere
except these steps oh i don't know
sometimes love can hide where you least
expect it
take this letter it looks ordinary
enough
vellum envelope series g stamp nine
digit zip code for easier handling
but smell it
jasmine whisper
sure sign that deep inside this envelope
there's talk of moonlight dancing in
somebody's eyes
the sounds of bells ringing across the
river whenever she wants me
i still really don't know what happened
next
they were just shoelaces but they were
so
so
cute
all of a sudden my liver began to sweat
my brain began to wobble and my heart it
went
oh no
what is it
[Music]
love bites pete remember love
[Music]
Love Bites
but i love her it's pete girls like
heather don't talk to guys like you want
a bath
hey heather
drop dead i quit breathing my air
you see
pete i gotta go ellen don't be jealous
i'm not jealous i'm trying to make the
tennis team just one ball that's all i'm
asking
one ball boom over the fence
she'll look at and say
little help
and i'll you know just kind of
amble on over
pick up that ball
and give her more help than anyone's
ever given her
you're pathetic
i do it for you
[Music]
sorry heather
i just had it restrung a little help
please i got it
while ellen's
help
only dragged my brother deeper into the
fever i had to snap pete out of it using
the scientific approach
[Music]
okay pete let's hear it
come on pete you can do it love
[Music]
Stingfest
all right wrigley let's go don't be
loser don't be a dud
don't fall in love or you'll feel like
cry
come on just eight more miles and the
fever will be kaputski now bust a rock
you
are the sunshine of my life
eat sludge stingfest lover's worse than
swollen gland
hey it's working i come bearing gifts
it's my meat masterpiece
notice the delicate array of meat
selections from your lovely pepper loaf
head tear
snuggly ugly liverwurst toes
i'm especially fond of the boiled ham
cast
love four losers love for dinks
love smells worse
than a cocky sink
[Music]
[Music]
drippity chirpity chief
Operation Heart Punch
what
happened
eunice pew
she's my little whisky bush kid
[Music]
once i started talking
baby talk the fever was back in all its
pukifying glory
only one thing could save me now
operation
heart punch
[Applause]
[Music]
it's dj clark
[Music]
Krepstar
operation heart punch is brought to you
by the fine folks at krep star
from sponge cake to space stations it's
gotta be krep star
nona
if you're watching this tape then i've
reached love con one the first stage of
the fever
unless you neutralize it the pete
wrigley you used to know
will disappear
you gotta move fast
or soon
i'll say the three
most gut boiling words
in the entire universe
[Music]
your mission
find my brother pete
he'll know how to save
good luck nightcrawler
you can count on me
i promise this is the last ball
i think heather's warming up to me
Tennis
pickle quit talking to that dwink and
let's go
coming
pete you said one more ball two days ago
ugh i hate it when you make that face
all right one more
[Music]
oops
oops
gee what a surprise it's you
a little help oh lucky for you i was
passing by huh yeah lucky for me great
game tennis
more of a badminton man myself it's like
tennis thinner racket no ball if uh
you'd like to learn i'll hire a pro do
you mind
uh not at all
[Music]
um
crosswind so i'll get it
[Music]
what are you doing pete your brother's
got the fever
holy moly
it's bad
excuse me sometime this year
this is not a good time
but he's drooling
you're the only one who can help him
come on
ellen just open a new can
no no i'll get it
listen just give pete some aspirins he
likes a chewable kind
pete had gone glandular
and if nona didn't find a way to save me
from the fever
i'd be next
Worms
nona
if my brother failed then i've reached
lovecon too
i'm sorry you have to see me this way
did you ever notice
how worms bunch up in a ball when you
put them in a jar
it's kind of
romantic
i know and when you try to take one worm
out
the others won't let go
oh
it's
beautiful
so beautiful
[Music]
keep fiddling johnny
[Applause]
[Music]
if you're ever going to stop me from
saying
then you've got to get someone to
b*at the fever out of me
and there's only one person in
wellsville who can do it
Love Has Changed Me
i am gonna punch out a symphony on his
face
and dedicate his pain to you
that's so romantic shut up
you're prepared to
wait a minute
this is a test
you want to see if i've changed
well i'm a new man
but
that you can't stain surgeon stink
let's not forget the moistest man alive
no
no i'll prove it love love has changed
me
love
is
what wakes the birds in the morning
love talks them in at night
love makes the clouds take warning
love makes everything all right
love makes the dewdrops glisten
so listen
Spring Fever
if you're still watching pit's staying
sogged out
nona
you've got to find someone
anyone who doesn't have the fever
maybe they'll have the answer
it's my last hope
[Music]
no no i'm trying to play here it's pete
he's got the fever he's gone kablanker
yeah spring fever
there's a lot of that going around here
a little help
i got it
[Music]
this fever it turns you into a spazzo
a slobbering
yeah
i didn't
monkey
a poor
sweet sentimental fool
look at him
ellen don't lose it
you gotta fight it ellen
why fight love
[Music]
Hey Pete
and so ellen hickle my last hope
fell like a sack of pig guts
she felt so hard she took the rest of us
with her
dear pete
it took me so long to see how much you
mean to me
the way the sunlight plays on your
freckles
the way the wind washed through your
soft right hand
another day another couple brought
together at third class rates
[Music]
hey pete
hey eunice how's every little thing
great pete i'd stay in chat but you know
love like the u.s mail waits for no one
peed wrigley
for me
dear pete
it took me so long to see how much you
mean to me
the way the sunlight plays on your
freckles the way the wind wafts through
your soft red hair
now i really know in my deepest heart
i love you
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
heckle let's start before that creep
shows up
oops
too late
[Music]
alan
great i was hoping you'd be here you
were
so did you um get anything in the mail
did i
i don't know what i was thinking
me too
those old sneakers were terrible no
traction at all
look what i sent away for
these babies will bite the turf
sneakers
hit me a good one ellen me and my pro
crabs are ready
you want a ball
i'll give you a ball
[Music]
i got it
[Music]
i got it
i got it
i got it
i got it
Love Con 4
well
i guess it's all over by now i've
reached the final stage love con4
and any minute
these words
are gonna come hurling out of my mouth
and i'll be lost
in the sinkhole
of love
nona
don't remember me as a
squealing
dripping love
remember
the pete you knew
remember
the peta used to be
[Music]
flowers nature's own parcel of love
are they for somebody special
i think so
i've been working on a poem it's for you
pete
hush my sweetest
to mail woman pure
through rain and snow
and even car stall out
through fire and locusts and nuclear
fallout
no one i know is as steadfast and true
no one i know
is as special as you
eunice puel puli
[Music]
eunice
i love
you
and i love you
i love you i love you
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
you love
what are you talking about
love bites love rules kiss me carrot
head
crawl into your cocoa
pete before you say anything wait
i need to give you this letter back
eunice
e
i think we both know this is a big
mistake
you know
i think you're right
you'll know who to give it to someday
i think i already know
[Music]
calm down
[Music]
pardon me ellen
i'm afraid this was delivered to the
wrong person
i'm sorry
i misrouted the course of true love
[Music]
i'll make sure he gets this
the male isn't always perfect
but like love
it eventually makes it through
[Music]
what happened
you had a big fall pete
i guess i got a little bit carried away
when i hit that ball
i'm sorry
i don't know what came over me spring
fever
glad that's over
at least you didn't get it
yeah
and as quickly as it came the worst
fever wellsville had ever seen finally
started to burn itself out
one by one people returned to normal
[Music]
even no no
stop that
just kidding would the fever be back
next year
maybe
but we'd be ready
[Music]
this
[Music]
[Applause]
we
[Music]
making mine
[Applause]
[Music]
03x06 - Crisis in the Love Zone
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Centers around two brothers, both named Pete Wrigley, and their humorous and surreal adventures in suburbia among their equally eccentric friends, enemies, and neighbors.
Centers around two brothers, both named Pete Wrigley, and their humorous and surreal adventures in suburbia among their equally eccentric friends, enemies, and neighbors.