04x13 - Brotherhood, Sisterhood

[bunniefuu]

Hey, Nicholas!

What are you doing?

Well, I'm building an addition

to my playhouse.

You're building a hole?

It's not just a hole.

It's gonna be a hot tub.

A hot tub? Now, whatever

gave you that idea?

Kenny Philanders older brother

has one at his house.

He said it's great for parties.

Nicholas, you're not old enough

for those kind of parties.

Why not?

It's just like a pool party.

Except the water moves

instead of the people.

I don't know if this hot tub

thing is such a good idea.

Why?

It's not just for parties.

Oh, it's good

for other things, like what?

Well, it's great for relaxing

and it gets the blood going

and it's excellent

for sore muscles.

Oh, come on, Nicholas.

Who are you kidding?

You don't have sore muscles.

Oh, yeah?

Try building yourself a hot tub.

[theme song]

♪ There's a magic in ♪

♪ The early morning

we've found ♪

♪ When the sunrise smiles ♪

♪ On everything around ♪

♪ It's a portrait

of the happiness ♪

♪ That we feel

and always will ♪

♪ Eight is enough ♪

♪ To fill our lives with love ♪

♪ Oh we spend our days like ♪

♪ Bright and shiny new dimes ♪

♪ If we're ever puzzled ♪

♪ By the changing times ♪

♪ There's a plate

of homemade wishes ♪

♪ On the kitchen window sill ♪

♪ And eight is enough ♪

♪ To fill our lives

with love ♪♪

[instrumental music]

[clearing throat]

"A funny thing happened to me

on the way to the classroom.

"A guy comes up to me and says

Mister, can you help me out?

I haven't had a bite in a week."

- So I.. Ow!

- Ahh.

I'm sorry, Nicholas. I just,

well, I heard you talking

and the door was open

and I couldn't control myself.

That's okay,

I was just practicing

for this dumb speech

I have to give in school.

Oh, yeah? What's it about?

Well, nothing yet,

but it's gonna be about dad.

Well.. How could it be

about your father?

I happen to know he ate

breakfast this morning.

No. Thomas said I should start

off with a couple of jokes.

You know, to loosen up

the audience.

Oh, well, my experience

with fifth grade audiences

is that they're pretty

loose already.

Yeah, well I figured

if the speech stinks

I can get a few laughs.

How could the speech stink

if it's about your father?

Easy. I'm writing it.

(Mary)

'Well, he's a writer. Why don't

you get him to help you?'

No, I don't wanna

put him through it.

You know how much

he hates speeches.

No, Nicholas,

he hates giving speeches.

I'm sure he'd love

being the subject of one.

Well, uh, he's not only

my business partner

this is my dad, Tom Bradford.

Gene and Craig.

Nice to meet you,

Mr. Bradford.

- Ditto here.

- Yeah.

This is some nice work

you've done here.

Yeah, well you raised yourself

one heck of a contractor.

I know.

We're proud of him.

- Take care, Mr. Bradford.

- Okay. See you, fellas.

Boy, David, this is

an impressive achievement

for a man your age.

I really am proud of you.

Oh, thanks dad.

Oh, that reminds me.

Uh, let's head over

to my office.

I have something

I've gotta show you.

Oh, yeah?

You know, dad, uh, we showed

a pretty healthy profit

last quarter.

Really? How much?

Well, here's your share.

Oh, my gosh,

that's wonderful!

You know, when I gave you

this money

I never expected

to be seeing a profit.

Well, you had a lot

of confidence in me, didn't you?

Of course, I did.

It's just that the father

gets used to

giving his children money.

He's not used to

getting it back.

Well dad,

this isn't a family.

It's a business,

a money-making business.

And, uh, as my partner,

you can expect more of the same.

- Much more.

- Big plans, huh?

Well, uh, there's a possibility

I can get a sh*t at converting

a five star department building

over on Euclid Avenue.

Wow! What's stopping you?

Well, even if they accept my bid

I, uh, I'll need, uh,

new equipment, uh, larger crew.

An influx of capital, huh?

It's not uncommon

for an astute businessman

to reinvest his profits.

Right.

Will this help?

Dad, you're my kind

of businessman.

Yeah.

And I assure you that, uh

next quarters check

will be much bigger.

I hope it lasts longer

than this one did.

(Tommy)

'Hey, couldn't you have waited

until you got to work'

to put on that stupid uniform?

And change in

a X broom closet?

Forget it!

Well, you smell like

dead chickens.

Didn't you wash

that thing last night?

I was too tired.

Anyway, after five minutes

in the Cluck-n-Chuck

everybody smells

like chickens.

I don't see how

you can stand it.

Hey, it's the only place around

that hires high school kids.

Yeah, but only nerds work

at Cluck-n-Chuck.

That hurt, Bradford.

That really hurt.

I'm sorry, Ernie.

- 'Just do me a favor, will ya?'

- What?

If we run across

any girls we know..

...duck!

[engine sputtering]

Oh, no!

Well, what's the matter,

Bradford?

I don't know.

Maybe I blew something.

Well, hey,

how am I gonna get to work?

Walk!

In this?

Alice, how was school?

Boring as usual.

You were smart

to get out when you did.

- What are you so down about?

- Oh, I'm not down.

- I'm just frustrated.

- Yeah, I know.

It's culture shock going

from a small secure high school

to a large

and personal campus, right?

Yeah.

You'd think with , students

half of which are men,

I'd meet at least one

who didn't have the personality

of a tree stump.

Well, if that's your problem,

let me warn you.

The world is full

of tree stumps.

I know. I just thought

college would be different.

Well, on a campus

you do have certain advantages.

'Like what?'

Have you ever thought

about joining a sorority?

Oh, come on, Nancy.

No Bradford girl

has ever been in a sorority.

So what?

- You wanna meet men, right?

- Yeah.

Well, where there

are sororities

there also happen

to be fraternities.

And where there are

fraternities, there are--

- Jerks!

- Oh, just what I need.

Oh, come on, Mary, you can't

make generalizations like that.

Nancy, every frat guy

that I knew was shallow

vacuous and barely literate.

'And those were

upper-class men.'

(Susan)

'Well, I've met

a lot of frat guys'

'who aren't like that at all.'

Well, actually you're right.

Once at a football game,

I did meet a couple

of Kappa Eps

who were kind of interesting.

'Of course, uh, we didn't have

too much time to talk'

before they took

their clothes off

and streaked across

the field.

[instrumental music]

Hiya, Tommy!

What, are ya having a problem

with your van?

Yeah, I'm afraid so.

This time I think it's the

big kahuna. I threw a rod.

Oh, well,

what does that mean?

It means I'm gonna have to

replace the whole engine.

What?

Well, if I'm lucky,

I can probably

pick one up

at the, uh, junkyard

for about $.

Come on. Where are you gonna

get that kind of money?

Well, I was kinda hoping

that you would--

Oh, no, no.

Nothing doing.

When you bought this clunker,

I told you

it's your responsibility.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, but I just spent my last

$ on having it towed here.

Well, I guess you'll have to

get yourself a job, that's all.

Now, what kind of a job

can I get

that won't interfere

with school and the band?

Oh, you know what?

Your brother David told me

that he needed extra men.

'Maybe you could work

for David.'

Hey, that'd be excellent.

I can put in a few extra hours

after school

and work full-time

on the weekends.

Heck, I can have the bread for

the van in less than a month.

- Think he'd hire me?

- I don't know why not.

He's the one

who sold you this pineapple.

The least he could do

is give you a job.

Yeah. After all, he is the one

who sold me this pineapple.

Pineapple.

Good afternoon,

Mr. Bradford.

Yes, it's a pleasure

to be home, Mrs. Bradford.

When you have a chance,

Nicholas would like

to see you

in the living room.

He has something

very important to ask you.

Oh, well, then I better

see him right away.

Hi, Nicholas! What are you

reading the funnies?

The sports page?

Nah, I'm reading your column.

Oh ,really? Oh, well I-I didn't

know that you read my column.

It's my first time.

Ha! Well, w-what do you think

about it?

Not bad, but it's kind of long.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'll try to watch

the length the next time.

Now, I hear that you have

something very important

that you wanna talk to me about.

Yeah, I have to write

a speech about you.

- Really?

- Uh-huh.

And I figure I should

ask you some questions.

Oh, okay. sh**t!

What do you do?

Oh, w-what do you mean?

What do I do at The Register?

Well, I-I write, that column.

- That's all?

- Well, yes and no.

It's complicated.

It's-it's not something

that you can tell someone.

You have to show them.

Well, then I guess

I'll have to make it up.

Well, you could come to work

with me tomorrow

and I could show you what I do.

You mean, skip school?

Well, this would be like

going to school

because, uh, well,

you would be like a reporter

'recording everything

that I do, all day long.'

Okay.

And then you'll have plenty

to write

about me for your speech.

Great! Will you take me

out to lunch too?

Sure.

Where would you like to go?

Cluck-n-Chuck!

And I'll never forget

Rod Thiele.

He was a Phi Kappa Nu.

All I had to do was just

see him cross campus

and cold chills

would run through my body.

He was good looking,

strong, bright

Earthy and very spiritual.

And he had one of those receding

hairlines that drives me crazy.

[chuckles]

What ever happened to him?

Well, I think he dropped out

of school to become a lifeguard.

Oh, that's spiritual.

No, I'm sure

he's not doing that now.

Besides, there's a lot more

to sorority life

than just meeting guys.

I'm still very close to a few

of my sorority sisters.

Well, that does sound like fun.

Yeah, it almost makes me wish

I was still in college.

Oh, hey, it's never too late.

Have you been talking to dad?

Really, Elizabeth,

you should go by

my old house and check it out.

Do they still take pledges

in the middle of semester?

Sure. It's not like

it used to be.

They take in new girls

all the time.

- I think you'd like it.

- It's worth a try.

Well, if you wanna

meet a lot of guys

what have you got to lose?

At this point,

anything's worth a try.

[knocking on door]

Oh, come in.

- Hi, dad!

- 'Hi!'

I forgot to get you to sign this

at the construction site.

Oh, yes. Now, is this

going to cost me?

No.

By the way,

have you seen Tommy?

No, but I saw the van.

What happened?

I don't know.

I'm not quite sure.

But I'll tell you the damage

is pretty extensive.

He's gonna need a part-time job

to pay for the repairs.

And then I remembered

that you said

that you might need

some extra help.

- Forget it, dad.

- What?

Look, I feel badly for him, but

I don't think it's a good idea

that Tommy work for me.

Well, why not?

Because, I don't feel

right about it.

But he needs the money.

Then I'll lend him the money.

Dad, I'm a contractor now.

I have to look after

a whole crew.

I don't have time to look after

my little brother.

Boy, oh, boy, I don't

understand your attitude.

It's simple. Family working with

family is not good business.

Oh, now, just a second.

Suppose I had taken

that attitude with you

when you needed help?

And let me remind you, that

the business is family owned.

And as the major shareholder

and as your father

I'm telling you to hire Tommy.

[instrumental music]

And now, Nicholas,

this is my office.

- Pretty neat, dad.

- Oh, yeah. It sure is.

Every morning, I come in here,

there's always a newspaper

waiting on my desk.

And you know what I do?

I take the paper,

and I open it up to my column

and I check for mistakes.

Shouldn't you check for mistakes

before you turn it in?

Oh, no, no, no. I'm not looking

for my mistakes.

I'm looking

for the proof readers.

Oh!

'And if I find a mistake'

I quickly put the paper down

pick up the phone

and tell him about it.

And then, does he

have to do it over?

'Oh, no, no. It's too late.

The paper's already printed.'

Then what's the use

of telling him?

So he won't do it again!

- Does he do it on purpose?

- No.

But, you call him up

and yell at him anyway.

Nicholas, I don't yell at him.

It-it-it's just a system

of balancing and checking.

'If I don't check on the proof

reader, he'll become careless'

and he'll make the mistake

over and over again.

Well, who checks up on you?

Oh.. Well..

Listen, this isn't

that important.

Why don't we skip

to the next thing I do?

Sure, dad. I'm ready.

Alright, let's see now.

The next thing I do is..

...make myself

some coffee I guess.

Make some coffee.

Take water.

And this is the sitting room.

It's where we're supposed to

entertain our gentlemen callers.

Of course, these days,

most houses are pretty loose

about those kinds

of things.

Not my house.

Well, anyway I've showed you

just about everything.

It sure is nice.

But there's more to sorority

life then just this house.

You'll get a real sense

of camaraderie here.

'You'll form relationships

that will last a lifetime.'

'Not to mention the educational

benefits of group study

and intellectual interaction.

And of course, a social life

that if you choose

to take part in

will have you dragging yourself

to class most mornings.

- A lot of guy's, huh?

- More than you'll need.

Hey, there's a big bash

tonight at Gamma Si.

'You should come

and take a look.'

- Tonight?

- Yes.

It's the annual

Bowzer bacchanal.

Huh, what's that?

Well, Bowzer's

the frats mascot

and every year they

have this big party

celebrating his birthday.

I met my boyfriend

at the last one.

Well, it sounds like

a lot of fun.

Are you sure no one

will mind me coming?

Are you kidding?

This is a frat party.

All women are welcome

regardless of race, creed

or marital status.

You'll do fine.

I can't believe

your luck, Bradford.

You need a job

and the next day

you're working construction

earning the big bucks.

Well, you make your

own destiny, Ernie.

You live a good life and good

things will come to you.

It doesn't hurt

having a brother

who owns

the construction company.

- That too.

- Man, you've got it made.

You can goof off all day

and you can't get fired.

Oh, I won't be goofing off.

I'm gonna take this job

very seriously.

Of course, David will probably

make me his assistant.

You know, follow him around,

learn the business.

'Somethin' nice and easy.'

While I sl*ve away

at the Cluck-n-Chuck.

Yeah, well, maybe I could

put in a good word for you.

You could work for him too.

Nah. I just got promoted

to head fry cook.

I'm starting to build

a real future there.

Yeah. Before you know it, maybe

you could become Head Cluck!

Uh, did-did I show you

the tele-type?

- Yep.

- Oh, yeah, right.

And I showed you the city desk

the composing room,

the secretarial pool--

And the printing press,

and the lunch room

and Mr. Randolph's

polo trophies.

Oh, yeah. Well, very good.

We did that.

Now, let's see, the, uh

the next thing

that I do is, uh, well

I usually just sit here

and try to think

of an idea for my column.

Oh.

'I suppose you could sit here'

'and watch me do that,

if you want?'

I guess.

Alright.

Nicholas, what do you say

we have an early dinner?

But we just ate lunch.

Oh, yeah.

That's right. We did.

Well, we've accomplished enough.

What do you say

we call it a day?

- Now you're talking!

- Let's get out of here!

Alright!

Okay, now, remember, being

a laborer is not an easy job.

You gotta do everything

and take orders from everyone.

- Oh, I can handle it.

- Yeah.

And on this job,

I'm the boss. Remember that.

I know, David.

I'm not gonna let you down.

I know, I know.

- That kid the new laborer?

- Yeah.

Great, we can use

another one around here.

You don't know who he is?

- No. Who?

- The boss' brother.

Not a relative.

Haven't met one yet

that can put in a day's work.

This one will.

- You think so?

- I know so.

- 'Hey, Gene!'

- Yeah?

- Put this guy to work, okay?

- Sure thing, Dave.

- Good luck, Tommy.

- Oh, thanks.

- Come on, in here.

- Okay.

Okay, Bradford, you, uh,

see that truck down there?

- Yeah.

- Unload it.

- The whole truck?

- The whole truck.

[instrumental music]

Thanks for taking me

to work with you today.

Oh, that's okay. Are you sure

you weren't too bored?

Nah. Not when I wonder what

you're doing at work, I'll know.

And you think you got enough

information for your speech?

I think so.

But it sure

would be a lot easier

if you were a fireman.

Alright. Now if you need any

help, don't hesitate to call.

Okay.

Oh, I made it.

I can't believe that I made it.

Tommy, what's the matter?

I'm dying, that's all.

Why? Did something

happen at work?

Yeah. Today I did the work

of four men and a mule.

Oh. Well, don't worry.

I mean, the first day

is usually the toughest.

Tough?

My hair is the only thing

on my body that doesn't ache.

Oh. You know what you need?

A bath with epsom salts.

Tommy?

[instrumental music]

Goodnight, Tommy.

Hey, where are you goin'?

- To a Bowzer Bacchanal.

- A Bowzer Bacchanal.

What's that?

Well, Bowzer

is the fraternity's mascot

and in the dictionary, a

Bacchanal means a drunken feast.

Ah, it sounds disgusting.

How come you

wanna go to that?

Because I haven't been

to a drunken feast in months.

- Bye!

- Ah!

[indistinct chatter]

'Hey, you look great!'

[indistinct chatter]

Craig Mitchell,

class of '.

Uh, Elizabeth Bradford,

I guess, class of '.

[chuckles]

Geez, I haven't seen

you around here before.

Well, Cathy invited me.

She wanted me to see

what fraternity

and sorority life

is really like.

Well, come on in.

Let me show you around.

Okay.

See this here is, uh,

the vice president

of our little fraternity.

Hi!

You gotta watch

your step with him.

He's got a reputation

of being a real ladies man.

Over here, the man in the chair

is our trusted treasurer

Tom Vyro.

Tom had a four point

grade average last semester.

Tom, you'll be okay, really.

- How many fingers do I have up?

- Six.

Okay, Thomas.

Way to go, way to go.

- Elizabeth. Hi!

- Hi, there!

This is my boyfriend, Gilmour.

Hi, Gilmour.

Well, um,

we'll see you later, okay?

Okay.

And this of course,

over here is Bowzer!

Oh, nice to meet you, Bowzer.

Here you go.

Okay, everybody! Gather around,

gather around! It's o'clock.

'You know what

that means? Alright.'

[all cheering]

(Elizabeth)

Hey, Bowzer?

It's o'clock,

and you know what that means?

Ruff!

Good boy! Hmm.

Bowzer..

Bowzer, you've got

too much skin on your face.

You got two,

three, five chins!

Bowzer...let me ask

you something.

You're a smart dog.

Do you think

this is the right life for me?

Hmm?

Well, do ya?

Bowzer..

...you don't look so good.

Bowzer, I don't feel so good.

- Tommy? Tommy!

- What do you want?

David's honking for you.

David?

David! Oh, no!

Out late last night,

eh, Bradford?

Yeah, working here.

Yeah, well, stop yawnin'

and move this pile

of lumber over there.

Okay, okay.

[sighs]

[instrumental music]

[sighs]

Uh, what are these

boards doing here?

- I moved them here.

- This isn't where they belong.

They're supposed to be in

the other side of the house.

But, Jean told me

to put 'em over here.

[sighs]

Tommy, put them

on the other side, okay?

David, do you know how long

it took me to move these?

- You get paid by the hour.

- But, David--

Tommy, move them.

[scoffs]

Forget it.

I mean, why should I k*ll myself

because of Jean's mistake?

Tommy, you move those boards,

or you're fired.

[intense music]

[instrumental music]

[knock on door]

(Mary)

Elizabeth, will you

just speak to me?

Elizabeth?

[Elizabeth groaning]

- Are you alright?

- Uh.

I don't know. I don't remember.

It's all a blur.

Well, how does it feel to be

the sweetheart of Sigma Cay?

[chuckles]

Wonderful.

Looks like you had

a pretty good time.

Did you meet

the interesting guys?

No, but I had a very

nice chat with a bulldog.

Elizabeth, why are you

doing this to yourself?

Look, I know that today's

college students are concerned

with the same things that

we were when I went to school

but that doesn't mean

that you have to be that way.

Mary, please, I'm not in the

mood for lectures this morning.

It happens to be the afternoon.

Oh.

[sighs]

Elizabeth, I've never tried

to tell you how to run

your life and I never will

but it's obvious

that you're associating

with the wrong kind of people.

- No kidding.

- Alright, then.

Do me a favor

and try it my way.

Hm. Sure, Mary.

Whatever you say.

And, uh, Elizabeth,

your room is this way.

Here you go. Easy. Easy.

Hi.

How's the speech coming?

- It isn't.

- Uh-oh.

You're having trouble

getting started, huh?

I don't know what to say. I've

never written a speech before.

Mmm, it sounds like a severe

case of writer's block to me.

What's that?

Well, it's, it's the inability

to get started.

The, the fear of

the empty sheet of paper.

It's not the paper

I'm afraid of.

It's what I might write on it.

We-well, you needed

something to, um..

take your mind off this fear

so you can start thinking

clearly about what

you have to write.

Like what?

(Mary)

'Well, there've been

a lot of studies done on that.'

Some writers are into jogging

and some are into meditation.

Has this ever happened to you?

Oh, yeah, a lots of times.

- What do you do?

- I eat ice cream.

Alright!

Hi, Tommy.

How was work?

Well, it was great, if you don't

mind being the village idiot.

Oh. What's the matter?

Is something wrong?

I'll tell you what's wrong,

David's attitude.

He's bending over backwards

to prove that he doesn't favor

his little brother.

How?

By letting those jerks get

their laughs at my expense.

They know they can

push me around

and David won't do

anything about it.

Well, did you talk

to him about it?

- 'Sure.'

- What did he say?

"Do what they say

or you're fired."

Oh, come on,

that doesn't sound like David.

Yeah, maybe not the "Old David,"

but the "Boss David"

is on a major ego trip.

[bell tolling]

(Mary)

Look, Elizabeth,

I know that the 's are over

but there's nothing outdated

about doing

something worthwhile.

(Elizabeth)

But I don't even know

what "SST" stands for?

It stands for

"Students for a Sane Tomorrow."

I was a charter member

as an undergraduate.

[chuckles]

Well, Mary, I know

you're trying to help me

and everything, but

I really don't think this--

Elizabeth, look, this is

your chance to meet men

who care about the world

that we live in.

Men who are, are sensitive,

men who are intelligent.

Men who have more to do

with their lives

than, than guzzle beer and

throw food at each other.

Alright, okay, just tell me

where the meeting is.

Hayden lounge, second floor

of the student building.

It's my feeling, we should

emulate the Chinese paradigm.

Surround the cities

from the countryside.

But the idea of a viable

proletarian revolution is dead.

That's where

you're wrong, Sheila.

[scoffs]

What do you think?

Is the revolution dead or

merely in a state of dormancy?

I don't know, maybe it

just took a long lunch.

[all chuckling]

Would the young lady with the

disarming wit care to join us?

Well, is this

"Students for a Sane Tomorrow?"

One and the same.

Why don't you have a seat?

- My name is Herb Dubin.

- Elizabeth Bradford.

Glad you could come, Elizabeth.

Now, what were we talking about

before we digressed

into polemics?

We were discussing

the disco fund raiser.

(Herb)

Oh, yes, yes, yes!

And whether or not

the proceeds should go to

saving the whales or aiding

the Kurdish rebels, right?

Elizabeth, what's your

opinion on the subject?

- The Kurdish rebels?

- 'Yeah.'

Where's Kurd?

[scoffs]

[indistinct chatter]

If you've come here

to talk to me about Tommy

get ready for me

to change the subject.

Now, wait a minute, look,

David, I've never interfered

in your business, right?

Yes, you did,

when you told me to hire Tommy.

Oh. Oh, okay, okay.

But, I mean, aren't you

the least bit concerned

that your brother

is miserable on the job?

Either he can cut it,

or he can't, dad.

- I, I can't hold his hand.

- Yeah, but the other men..

Are giving him

the business, I know that.

I don't know.

What can I do about it?

Well, can't you talk to them?

And make it look like I'm

protecting my little brother?

I'd alienate my entire crew.

[sighs]

Look, dad, I didn't like hiring

Tommy for this very reason.

If he doesn't like

the way he's being treated

he has to handle it

himself or leave.

But we are talking

about your brother.

My grown brother who has to

learn to stand up for himself.

And he has to learn

that by himself.

Yeah.

Maybe you're right.

If I'm not, why are you

here instead of Tommy?

Okay, everybody, that's it.

See you next week.

Keep the faith.

[indistinct chatter]

I thought you might

wanna read this.

What is it?

The SST manifesto.

I wrote it with your sister

and another member

the night we occupied

the administration building.

Oh, I bet it's really radical.

Yeah, for an ideological tract

it has its share

of high points.

Here.

You can have this copy.

Thanks.

Uh, listen, if you went

to school with my sister

then how come you

still haven't graduated?

[chuckles]

You think I'm just

one of those professional

students, don't you?

No, I was just wondering--

Look, I just switched majors,

that's all.

I started out

in political science

and then the w*r ended, so

I got into ceramics, of course.

And then when everybody

was getting back to the land

I switched to agriculture.

I even grew my own food

in the dorm.

- What are you majoring in now?

- Business.

I think it's the only way

to truly understand

the Boojwah mentality.

Of course.

Well, thanks for the book.

Say, Elizabeth, there's

an East-Indian movie playing

at the Biograph tonight.

Would you like to come with me?

[chuckles]

I don't think so, Herb. Thanks.

(Herb)

'You must have other plans.'

[scoffs]

No.

I just don't think that that

movie is quite relevant enough.

What do you mean?

I-it has to be relevant.

It's in subtitles.

Uh.

Hey, little brother,

did you pulled the nails

out of that panel

like I asked you?

No, I haven't had a chance.

I'll get to it after the break.

Hey, man, you got a job to do.

You break after you do it.

Has anybody seen

my hammer around?

It should be

in your tool belt.

I know.

'Has anyone seen it

lying around?'

Now, a worker's never supposed

to lose sight of his tools.

That must have been the first

thing your brother told you.

Thanks for the tip.

Oh, wait a minute.

Is that your tool belt?

[sighs]

[chuckling]

You're pretty funny.

[chuckling]

[all laughing]

[chuckling]

(David)

Okay, boys, break's over.

[grunting]

David, I can't take

any more of this.

Calm down, it's just

hard hat humor.

Look, I didn't come here

for a hard time.

I came here to work

and earn some money.

You can do it.

Now, how can I,

if they won't let me?

I can't fight

your battles for you.

But does it take a battle

to get treated equally?

Come on, stop acting

like a mudder, huh?

Oh, come on, man,

I'm your brother.

Everywhere, but here.

Here I'm your boss!

Okay. Okay, boss.

Start looking for

a new lackey, 'cause I quit.

[intense music]

(male #)

'Hey, look, you need that

fan to operate, Bradford.'

How else you gonna

get the bucks?

Besides, this place

kind of grows on you.

Yeah, like fungus.

Hey, well, at least,

you don't have to put up

with any construction workers.

The Cluck 'N' Chuck

gets a very chick clientele.

[chuckling]

Hey, look, all you gotta do

is to take this bus cart around

clean off the dirty tables.

It's a cinch

once you get it down.

And if anyone

from school shows up

you can hide

in the back room.

Oh, that's just what I need.

- Good luck.

- Hey, where are you going?

Bradford, you're forgetting.

I got promoted to head clerk.

This is your turf now.

You mean I actually

have to wear this thing?

Bradford, you represent

the Cluck 'N' Chuck now.

You have an image to uphold.

[clucking]

[whistling]

Oh. Elizabeth, you're starting

to get me depressed.

Oh, come on.

Every freshman goes

through a rough time.

I would have too if

I'd lasted through a semester.

[scoffs]

Come on, cutie,

snap out of it.

- Please?

- Uh.

I just don't know

what I'm gonna do, Nancy.

Well, I thought you were

gonna join a sorority.

No. Mary's right.

Greek life is just an escape.

Yeah, but, Elizabeth, if that's

what you really wanna do then--

Elizabeth, how did

it go with the SST?

Oh, it was a riot.

Oh, I guess

things haven't changed.

'What do you think?

Are you gonna join?'

- I don't know, Mary.

- What's "SST?"

Oh, it's a student activist

group on campus.

Why would you wanna belong

to something like that?

Well, maybe because

she's interested

in raising her consciousness.

(Nancy)

'Look, Mary, why don't you

let Elizabeth decide'

what she wants to do

instead of you telling her--

Look, why don't you two just

give me a break and shut up?

I'm tired of everyone

trying to run my life for me

and I've had all the frat rats

and intellectual hypocrites

I can handle.

So, just, just leave me alone.

Hey, Nicholas!

How's your speech

coming along?

Am I, uh, proving to be

an entertaining subject?

- Not really.

- Oh.

Uh, well, that's nice.

Uh, may I, uh, see

what you've written so far?

You don't mind if I take

a little peak, do you? Ahem!

"My father sits

all day long at a big desk."

Well, is that all

you've written?

That's all,

because that's all you do.

Oh. You mean, just like

what you're doing right now?

'It's not so easy, is it?'

Especially, when you've got

writer's block.

Now, that's no excuse, Nicholas.

I mean, there are ways

to become unblocked.

You have to utilize

your imagination.

Concentrate on

what you saw at the office.

And on your writing and what

you've learned about writing

trying to write about a writer.

Now, you do this for a while,

give your mind a rest

and all of a sudden

things will clear up.

Okay, but I sure did think

it'd be a lot easier

if you were a fireman.

Oh, well,

I don't know about that.

In the meantime,

I'm going to leave you alone

with your thoughts

and I promise you

nobody's going to

bother you, okay?

[sighs]

- Dad?

- Oh, David.

Hi. Um, is Tommy around?

I brought him his wages

for the two days he worked.

No, no, he's found

himself another job.

Well, uh, will you

give this to him, then?

Oh, yeah, sure,

of course, I will.

[sighs]

Look, dad, I'm sorry about

what happened with Tommy.

I, uh, I tried to be fair,

he just couldn't cut it.

Yeah, well, he said you

that you didn't give him

much of a chance.

I told you I wasn't

going to hold his hand.

Is that my fault that he

couldn't get along in the job?

No, of course not,

but you could've made it

a little easier

for him to try.

That's what every man

in the crew was waiting for.

For the boss to treat his

little brother like a prince.

So, you overcompensated.

You leaned over

backwards to prove

that you weren't showing any

favoritism and all the while

Tommy was getting more

than he bargained for.

You also expect me

to fight his battles for him.

Oh, come on, is that too much

to expect from your own brother?

From his boss, yes. Dad,

I have ten men to think about.

I can't lose them

or their respect.

You see you're so worried

about losing the respect

of those ten men and in

the meantime, you're losing

the respect

of your own brother.

[instrumental music]

[bicycle bell dings]

Ahem.

Excuse me?

Oh. Hi.

Uh..

This may sound stupid

but I-I just wanted to meet

somebody who I wanted to meet.

Oh.

I, uh, guess you just look

like someone I'd like to meet.

[sighs]

Look, is this some sort

of sorority initiation?

No. I, I was just

trying to be assertive.

Really?

Uh, why don't you sit down?

Thanks.

This has never happened

to me before.

I mean, a girl

coming over and..

[chuckles]

It's my first time too.

Really?

You know..

You look pretty familiar.

- Have we met before?

- I don't think so.

No, I recognize

your face from somewhere.

Wait a minute.

Were you in a frat party

the other night?

Uh, you mean

the Bowzer Bacchanal?

- Yeah.

- Yeah, I was there.

But I don't remember much.

I was the guy who was

passed out on the floor.

Right next to the empty keg.

- That was you?

- Yeah.

I think I tripped

over your head.

That was you?

Maybe that's why

my head still hurts.

Uh, so are you in that frat?

Uh, no. I really

haven't made up my mind.

I was kind of thinking of

joining the Delta Lambda Chi.

- Oh.

- Are you in house?

No, I was thinking about

joining, but, uh, I don't know.

Look, don't let

the Bowzer Bacchanal

give you the wrong idea.

It really doesn't

happen that often.

'Still a pretty decent way

to meet people, though.'

Yeah, I guess so.

I mean, uh, it's how

we first got together.

So to speak.

[chuckling]

[sighs]

By the way, my name is Jack,

Jack Binder.

Elizabeth Bradford.

It's nice to know you,

Elizabeth.

Same here.

- Hi.

- Hi.

I know it's impossible

to drag you away from your work

but I thought it would be nice

if we have dinner together.

Sure.

Very subtle.

Why, David, I do not know

what you're talking about.

Oh, sure, you don't, you just,

uh, happen to get our dinner

at Cluck 'N' Chuck.

Oh, I was trying

to be economical.

I mean, with Tommy working there

we did get

the % family discount.

- Does he looked miserable?

- I really didn't see him.

Ernie said he was hiding

in the back room.

I'll be back.

- How's the food here?

- I wouldn't know.

I only see it

after it's been eaten.

Tommy, I didn't come here

because I was hungry.

No? I guess you're

a little smarter than I thought.

[sighs]

I came here to admit

that I made a mistake.

Well, that doesn't

do much good now.

Maybe not, but, uh, I wanted

you to know where I stood.

As I recall,

that was pretty far away.

Listen.

Coming between you

and Jean would have done

more harm than good.

If you don't wanna get

hassled by those guys

you've gotta

get their respect.

If I'd intervened

you never would have.

Now, what was I supposed

to do with those guys?

(David)

Stand up for yourself.

Show them that

they can't push you around.

Not because

you're the boss' brother

but because you're not

afraid of anyone.

Look, I went down there

to work.

I didn't go down there to

put up with those jerk's games.

Well, part of work is learning

how to handle those games.

Listen, Tommy,

I know you need money.

And I know I could've

given you more help than I did.

[sighs]

What I'm saying is, uh,

I think you should come back

and give it another try, huh?

[instrumental music]

- So, how's dorm life?

- It's okay.

The real down about living

in the dorm is the food.

That bad, huh?

You know why

most freshmen drop out?

It's not the workload,

it's the meal plan.

Well, listen, if you

need a home-cooked meal

you know who to call.

- Really?

- Mm-hmm.

Can I call even if I don't

want a home-cooked meal?

Sure.

Elizabeth, thanks

for being so assertive.

Thank you for being

such a nice guy.

If you think this was nice,

wait till you see me on a date.

I'm downright charming.

You better be.

Uh, little brother.

I don't suppose

you've seen my tool belt?

Oh, what does it look like?

Hey, don't try to be funny, pal.

I'm just trying to help.

Yeah, well, if you see it

let me know.

Oh.

Could that be your tool belt?

[sighs]

Is that your idea of the joke?

No, I just thought I'd give you

a taste of your own medicine

and then see how you like it.

Well, we don't

like it much, pal.

Now, why don't you

do yourself a favor

and climb up there

and get it before I--

Before what? Huh?

You wanna see what I'm made of?

'Come on, one at a time.'

Oh, boy, look at this.

Little brother's

a tough customer these days.

You, first.

Don't you think you're

a little out of your league?

Maybe. Maybe I'll end up

in a hospital.

But, at least, I'll get in

a few licks before I go.

I'm through putting up

with you guys.

Okay. You've made your point.

We're here to do a job,

not fight.

It's fine with me.

Now, what do you say

we get to work?

Okay.

[sighing]

[instrumental music]

[sighs]

P-E-L-A-G-E.

- Ta-da!

- Pelage?

- It's a fur coat of an animal.

- Sure, it is.

Look it up,

she's bluffing.

- Okay.

- See everybody later.

Oh, you're going out

with Jack again?

- Mm-hmm.

- Another frat party?

Oh, no, Mary, something

much more worthwhile.

We're going to

an SST disco fundraiser.

You should go.

Herb Dubin will be there.

Maybe another time, Elizabeth.

- Okay. Buh-bye.

- Bye.

- Goodbye.

- Have a good time.

Uh-oh. "Pelage."

"The fury, hairy coat

of an animal."

[humming]

And don't forget

"G" is a triple letter score.

Wait, "G" is a triple letter..

Nicholas!

Oh, you never told us

how your speech went?

Better than I thought it would.

See? I told you.

See, I was kind of scared

at first that the kids

in the classroom would

think that your job

was nothing special, but

after I heard their speeches

'I knew not to worry.'

Why?

Because their dads jobs are

just as boring as yours is.

[all chuckling]

[theme music]