Hey, Nicholas!
What are you doing?
Well, I'm building an addition
to my playhouse.
You're building a hole?
It's not just a hole.
It's gonna be a hot tub.
A hot tub? Now, whatever
gave you that idea?
Kenny Philanders older brother
has one at his house.
He said it's great for parties.
Nicholas, you're not old enough
for those kind of parties.
Why not?
It's just like a pool party.
Except the water moves
instead of the people.
I don't know if this hot tub
thing is such a good idea.
Why?
It's not just for parties.
Oh, it's good
for other things, like what?
Well, it's great for relaxing
and it gets the blood going
and it's excellent
for sore muscles.
Oh, come on, Nicholas.
Who are you kidding?
You don't have sore muscles.
Oh, yeah?
Try building yourself a hot tub.
[theme song]
♪ There's a magic in ♪
♪ The early morning
we've found ♪
♪ When the sunrise smiles ♪
♪ On everything around ♪
♪ It's a portrait
of the happiness ♪
♪ That we feel
and always will ♪
♪ Eight is enough ♪
♪ To fill our lives with love ♪
♪ Oh we spend our days like ♪
♪ Bright and shiny new dimes ♪
♪ If we're ever puzzled ♪
♪ By the changing times ♪
♪ There's a plate
of homemade wishes ♪
♪ On the kitchen window sill ♪
♪ And eight is enough ♪
♪ To fill our lives
with love ♪♪
[instrumental music]
[clearing throat]
"A funny thing happened to me
on the way to the classroom.
"A guy comes up to me and says
Mister, can you help me out?
I haven't had a bite in a week."
- So I.. Ow!
- Ahh.
I'm sorry, Nicholas. I just,
well, I heard you talking
and the door was open
and I couldn't control myself.
That's okay,
I was just practicing
for this dumb speech
I have to give in school.
Oh, yeah? What's it about?
Well, nothing yet,
but it's gonna be about dad.
Well.. How could it be
about your father?
I happen to know he ate
breakfast this morning.
No. Thomas said I should start
off with a couple of jokes.
You know, to loosen up
the audience.
Oh, well, my experience
with fifth grade audiences
is that they're pretty
loose already.
Yeah, well I figured
if the speech stinks
I can get a few laughs.
How could the speech stink
if it's about your father?
Easy. I'm writing it.
(Mary)
'Well, he's a writer. Why don't
you get him to help you?'
No, I don't wanna
put him through it.
You know how much
he hates speeches.
No, Nicholas,
he hates giving speeches.
I'm sure he'd love
being the subject of one.
Well, uh, he's not only
my business partner
this is my dad, Tom Bradford.
Gene and Craig.
Nice to meet you,
Mr. Bradford.
- Ditto here.
- Yeah.
This is some nice work
you've done here.
Yeah, well you raised yourself
one heck of a contractor.
I know.
We're proud of him.
- Take care, Mr. Bradford.
- Okay. See you, fellas.
Boy, David, this is
an impressive achievement
for a man your age.
I really am proud of you.
Oh, thanks dad.
Oh, that reminds me.
Uh, let's head over
to my office.
I have something
I've gotta show you.
Oh, yeah?
You know, dad, uh, we showed
a pretty healthy profit
last quarter.
Really? How much?
Well, here's your share.
Oh, my gosh,
that's wonderful!
You know, when I gave you
this money
I never expected
to be seeing a profit.
Well, you had a lot
of confidence in me, didn't you?
Of course, I did.
It's just that the father
gets used to
giving his children money.
He's not used to
getting it back.
Well dad,
this isn't a family.
It's a business,
a money-making business.
And, uh, as my partner,
you can expect more of the same.
- Much more.
- Big plans, huh?
Well, uh, there's a possibility
I can get a sh*t at converting
a five star department building
over on Euclid Avenue.
Wow! What's stopping you?
Well, even if they accept my bid
I, uh, I'll need, uh,
new equipment, uh, larger crew.
An influx of capital, huh?
It's not uncommon
for an astute businessman
to reinvest his profits.
Right.
Will this help?
Dad, you're my kind
of businessman.
Yeah.
And I assure you that, uh
next quarters check
will be much bigger.
I hope it lasts longer
than this one did.
(Tommy)
'Hey, couldn't you have waited
until you got to work'
to put on that stupid uniform?
And change in
a X broom closet?
Forget it!
Well, you smell like
dead chickens.
Didn't you wash
that thing last night?
I was too tired.
Anyway, after five minutes
in the Cluck-n-Chuck
everybody smells
like chickens.
I don't see how
you can stand it.
Hey, it's the only place around
that hires high school kids.
Yeah, but only nerds work
at Cluck-n-Chuck.
That hurt, Bradford.
That really hurt.
I'm sorry, Ernie.
- 'Just do me a favor, will ya?'
- What?
If we run across
any girls we know..
...duck!
[engine sputtering]
Oh, no!
Well, what's the matter,
Bradford?
I don't know.
Maybe I blew something.
Well, hey,
how am I gonna get to work?
Walk!
In this?
Alice, how was school?
Boring as usual.
You were smart
to get out when you did.
- What are you so down about?
- Oh, I'm not down.
- I'm just frustrated.
- Yeah, I know.
It's culture shock going
from a small secure high school
to a large
and personal campus, right?
Yeah.
You'd think with , students
half of which are men,
I'd meet at least one
who didn't have the personality
of a tree stump.
Well, if that's your problem,
let me warn you.
The world is full
of tree stumps.
I know. I just thought
college would be different.
Well, on a campus
you do have certain advantages.
'Like what?'
Have you ever thought
about joining a sorority?
Oh, come on, Nancy.
No Bradford girl
has ever been in a sorority.
So what?
- You wanna meet men, right?
- Yeah.
Well, where there
are sororities
there also happen
to be fraternities.
And where there are
fraternities, there are--
- Jerks!
- Oh, just what I need.
Oh, come on, Mary, you can't
make generalizations like that.
Nancy, every frat guy
that I knew was shallow
vacuous and barely literate.
'And those were
upper-class men.'
(Susan)
'Well, I've met
a lot of frat guys'
'who aren't like that at all.'
Well, actually you're right.
Once at a football game,
I did meet a couple
of Kappa Eps
who were kind of interesting.
'Of course, uh, we didn't have
too much time to talk'
before they took
their clothes off
and streaked across
the field.
[instrumental music]
Hiya, Tommy!
What, are ya having a problem
with your van?
Yeah, I'm afraid so.
This time I think it's the
big kahuna. I threw a rod.
Oh, well,
what does that mean?
It means I'm gonna have to
replace the whole engine.
What?
Well, if I'm lucky,
I can probably
pick one up
at the, uh, junkyard
for about $.
Come on. Where are you gonna
get that kind of money?
Well, I was kinda hoping
that you would--
Oh, no, no.
Nothing doing.
When you bought this clunker,
I told you
it's your responsibility.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, but I just spent my last
$ on having it towed here.
Well, I guess you'll have to
get yourself a job, that's all.
Now, what kind of a job
can I get
that won't interfere
with school and the band?
Oh, you know what?
Your brother David told me
that he needed extra men.
'Maybe you could work
for David.'
Hey, that'd be excellent.
I can put in a few extra hours
after school
and work full-time
on the weekends.
Heck, I can have the bread for
the van in less than a month.
- Think he'd hire me?
- I don't know why not.
He's the one
who sold you this pineapple.
The least he could do
is give you a job.
Yeah. After all, he is the one
who sold me this pineapple.
Pineapple.
Good afternoon,
Mr. Bradford.
Yes, it's a pleasure
to be home, Mrs. Bradford.
When you have a chance,
Nicholas would like
to see you
in the living room.
He has something
very important to ask you.
Oh, well, then I better
see him right away.
Hi, Nicholas! What are you
reading the funnies?
The sports page?
Nah, I'm reading your column.
Oh ,really? Oh, well I-I didn't
know that you read my column.
It's my first time.
Ha! Well, w-what do you think
about it?
Not bad, but it's kind of long.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'll try to watch
the length the next time.
Now, I hear that you have
something very important
that you wanna talk to me about.
Yeah, I have to write
a speech about you.
- Really?
- Uh-huh.
And I figure I should
ask you some questions.
Oh, okay. sh**t!
What do you do?
Oh, w-what do you mean?
What do I do at The Register?
Well, I-I write, that column.
- That's all?
- Well, yes and no.
It's complicated.
It's-it's not something
that you can tell someone.
You have to show them.
Well, then I guess
I'll have to make it up.
Well, you could come to work
with me tomorrow
and I could show you what I do.
You mean, skip school?
Well, this would be like
going to school
because, uh, well,
you would be like a reporter
'recording everything
that I do, all day long.'
Okay.
And then you'll have plenty
to write
about me for your speech.
Great! Will you take me
out to lunch too?
Sure.
Where would you like to go?
Cluck-n-Chuck!
And I'll never forget
Rod Thiele.
He was a Phi Kappa Nu.
All I had to do was just
see him cross campus
and cold chills
would run through my body.
He was good looking,
strong, bright
Earthy and very spiritual.
And he had one of those receding
hairlines that drives me crazy.
[chuckles]
What ever happened to him?
Well, I think he dropped out
of school to become a lifeguard.
Oh, that's spiritual.
No, I'm sure
he's not doing that now.
Besides, there's a lot more
to sorority life
than just meeting guys.
I'm still very close to a few
of my sorority sisters.
Well, that does sound like fun.
Yeah, it almost makes me wish
I was still in college.
Oh, hey, it's never too late.
Have you been talking to dad?
Really, Elizabeth,
you should go by
my old house and check it out.
Do they still take pledges
in the middle of semester?
Sure. It's not like
it used to be.
They take in new girls
all the time.
- I think you'd like it.
- It's worth a try.
Well, if you wanna
meet a lot of guys
what have you got to lose?
At this point,
anything's worth a try.
[knocking on door]
Oh, come in.
- Hi, dad!
- 'Hi!'
I forgot to get you to sign this
at the construction site.
Oh, yes. Now, is this
going to cost me?
No.
By the way,
have you seen Tommy?
No, but I saw the van.
What happened?
I don't know.
I'm not quite sure.
But I'll tell you the damage
is pretty extensive.
He's gonna need a part-time job
to pay for the repairs.
And then I remembered
that you said
that you might need
some extra help.
- Forget it, dad.
- What?
Look, I feel badly for him, but
I don't think it's a good idea
that Tommy work for me.
Well, why not?
Because, I don't feel
right about it.
But he needs the money.
Then I'll lend him the money.
Dad, I'm a contractor now.
I have to look after
a whole crew.
I don't have time to look after
my little brother.
Boy, oh, boy, I don't
understand your attitude.
It's simple. Family working with
family is not good business.
Oh, now, just a second.
Suppose I had taken
that attitude with you
when you needed help?
And let me remind you, that
the business is family owned.
And as the major shareholder
and as your father
I'm telling you to hire Tommy.
[instrumental music]
And now, Nicholas,
this is my office.
- Pretty neat, dad.
- Oh, yeah. It sure is.
Every morning, I come in here,
there's always a newspaper
waiting on my desk.
And you know what I do?
I take the paper,
and I open it up to my column
and I check for mistakes.
Shouldn't you check for mistakes
before you turn it in?
Oh, no, no, no. I'm not looking
for my mistakes.
I'm looking
for the proof readers.
Oh!
'And if I find a mistake'
I quickly put the paper down
pick up the phone
and tell him about it.
And then, does he
have to do it over?
'Oh, no, no. It's too late.
The paper's already printed.'
Then what's the use
of telling him?
So he won't do it again!
- Does he do it on purpose?
- No.
But, you call him up
and yell at him anyway.
Nicholas, I don't yell at him.
It-it-it's just a system
of balancing and checking.
'If I don't check on the proof
reader, he'll become careless'
and he'll make the mistake
over and over again.
Well, who checks up on you?
Oh.. Well..
Listen, this isn't
that important.
Why don't we skip
to the next thing I do?
Sure, dad. I'm ready.
Alright, let's see now.
The next thing I do is..
...make myself
some coffee I guess.
Make some coffee.
Take water.
And this is the sitting room.
It's where we're supposed to
entertain our gentlemen callers.
Of course, these days,
most houses are pretty loose
about those kinds
of things.
Not my house.
Well, anyway I've showed you
just about everything.
It sure is nice.
But there's more to sorority
life then just this house.
You'll get a real sense
of camaraderie here.
'You'll form relationships
that will last a lifetime.'
'Not to mention the educational
benefits of group study
and intellectual interaction.
And of course, a social life
that if you choose
to take part in
will have you dragging yourself
to class most mornings.
- A lot of guy's, huh?
- More than you'll need.
Hey, there's a big bash
tonight at Gamma Si.
'You should come
and take a look.'
- Tonight?
- Yes.
It's the annual
Bowzer bacchanal.
Huh, what's that?
Well, Bowzer's
the frats mascot
and every year they
have this big party
celebrating his birthday.
I met my boyfriend
at the last one.
Well, it sounds like
a lot of fun.
Are you sure no one
will mind me coming?
Are you kidding?
This is a frat party.
All women are welcome
regardless of race, creed
or marital status.
You'll do fine.
I can't believe
your luck, Bradford.
You need a job
and the next day
you're working construction
earning the big bucks.
Well, you make your
own destiny, Ernie.
You live a good life and good
things will come to you.
It doesn't hurt
having a brother
who owns
the construction company.
- That too.
- Man, you've got it made.
You can goof off all day
and you can't get fired.
Oh, I won't be goofing off.
I'm gonna take this job
very seriously.
Of course, David will probably
make me his assistant.
You know, follow him around,
learn the business.
'Somethin' nice and easy.'
While I sl*ve away
at the Cluck-n-Chuck.
Yeah, well, maybe I could
put in a good word for you.
You could work for him too.
Nah. I just got promoted
to head fry cook.
I'm starting to build
a real future there.
Yeah. Before you know it, maybe
you could become Head Cluck!
Uh, did-did I show you
the tele-type?
- Yep.
- Oh, yeah, right.
And I showed you the city desk
the composing room,
the secretarial pool--
And the printing press,
and the lunch room
and Mr. Randolph's
polo trophies.
Oh, yeah. Well, very good.
We did that.
Now, let's see, the, uh
the next thing
that I do is, uh, well
I usually just sit here
and try to think
of an idea for my column.
Oh.
'I suppose you could sit here'
'and watch me do that,
if you want?'
I guess.
Alright.
Nicholas, what do you say
we have an early dinner?
But we just ate lunch.
Oh, yeah.
That's right. We did.
Well, we've accomplished enough.
What do you say
we call it a day?
- Now you're talking!
- Let's get out of here!
Alright!
Okay, now, remember, being
a laborer is not an easy job.
You gotta do everything
and take orders from everyone.
- Oh, I can handle it.
- Yeah.
And on this job,
I'm the boss. Remember that.
I know, David.
I'm not gonna let you down.
I know, I know.
- That kid the new laborer?
- Yeah.
Great, we can use
another one around here.
You don't know who he is?
- No. Who?
- The boss' brother.
Not a relative.
Haven't met one yet
that can put in a day's work.
This one will.
- You think so?
- I know so.
- 'Hey, Gene!'
- Yeah?
- Put this guy to work, okay?
- Sure thing, Dave.
- Good luck, Tommy.
- Oh, thanks.
- Come on, in here.
- Okay.
Okay, Bradford, you, uh,
see that truck down there?
- Yeah.
- Unload it.
- The whole truck?
- The whole truck.
[instrumental music]
Thanks for taking me
to work with you today.
Oh, that's okay. Are you sure
you weren't too bored?
Nah. Not when I wonder what
you're doing at work, I'll know.
And you think you got enough
information for your speech?
I think so.
But it sure
would be a lot easier
if you were a fireman.
Alright. Now if you need any
help, don't hesitate to call.
Okay.
Oh, I made it.
I can't believe that I made it.
Tommy, what's the matter?
I'm dying, that's all.
Why? Did something
happen at work?
Yeah. Today I did the work
of four men and a mule.
Oh. Well, don't worry.
I mean, the first day
is usually the toughest.
Tough?
My hair is the only thing
on my body that doesn't ache.
Oh. You know what you need?
A bath with epsom salts.
Tommy?
[instrumental music]
Goodnight, Tommy.
Hey, where are you goin'?
- To a Bowzer Bacchanal.
- A Bowzer Bacchanal.
What's that?
Well, Bowzer
is the fraternity's mascot
and in the dictionary, a
Bacchanal means a drunken feast.
Ah, it sounds disgusting.
How come you
wanna go to that?
Because I haven't been
to a drunken feast in months.
- Bye!
- Ah!
[indistinct chatter]
'Hey, you look great!'
[indistinct chatter]
Craig Mitchell,
class of '.
Uh, Elizabeth Bradford,
I guess, class of '.
[chuckles]
Geez, I haven't seen
you around here before.
Well, Cathy invited me.
She wanted me to see
what fraternity
and sorority life
is really like.
Well, come on in.
Let me show you around.
Okay.
See this here is, uh,
the vice president
of our little fraternity.
Hi!
You gotta watch
your step with him.
He's got a reputation
of being a real ladies man.
Over here, the man in the chair
is our trusted treasurer
Tom Vyro.
Tom had a four point
grade average last semester.
Tom, you'll be okay, really.
- How many fingers do I have up?
- Six.
Okay, Thomas.
Way to go, way to go.
- Elizabeth. Hi!
- Hi, there!
This is my boyfriend, Gilmour.
Hi, Gilmour.
Well, um,
we'll see you later, okay?
Okay.
And this of course,
over here is Bowzer!
Oh, nice to meet you, Bowzer.
Here you go.
Okay, everybody! Gather around,
gather around! It's o'clock.
'You know what
that means? Alright.'
[all cheering]
(Elizabeth)
Hey, Bowzer?
It's o'clock,
and you know what that means?
Ruff!
Good boy! Hmm.
Bowzer..
Bowzer, you've got
too much skin on your face.
You got two,
three, five chins!
Bowzer...let me ask
you something.
You're a smart dog.
Do you think
this is the right life for me?
Hmm?
Well, do ya?
Bowzer..
...you don't look so good.
Bowzer, I don't feel so good.
- Tommy? Tommy!
- What do you want?
David's honking for you.
David?
David! Oh, no!
Out late last night,
eh, Bradford?
Yeah, working here.
Yeah, well, stop yawnin'
and move this pile
of lumber over there.
Okay, okay.
[sighs]
[instrumental music]
[sighs]
Uh, what are these
boards doing here?
- I moved them here.
- This isn't where they belong.
They're supposed to be in
the other side of the house.
But, Jean told me
to put 'em over here.
[sighs]
Tommy, put them
on the other side, okay?
David, do you know how long
it took me to move these?
- You get paid by the hour.
- But, David--
Tommy, move them.
[scoffs]
Forget it.
I mean, why should I k*ll myself
because of Jean's mistake?
Tommy, you move those boards,
or you're fired.
[intense music]
[instrumental music]
[knock on door]
(Mary)
Elizabeth, will you
just speak to me?
Elizabeth?
[Elizabeth groaning]
- Are you alright?
- Uh.
I don't know. I don't remember.
It's all a blur.
Well, how does it feel to be
the sweetheart of Sigma Cay?
[chuckles]
Wonderful.
Looks like you had
a pretty good time.
Did you meet
the interesting guys?
No, but I had a very
nice chat with a bulldog.
Elizabeth, why are you
doing this to yourself?
Look, I know that today's
college students are concerned
with the same things that
we were when I went to school
but that doesn't mean
that you have to be that way.
Mary, please, I'm not in the
mood for lectures this morning.
It happens to be the afternoon.
Oh.
[sighs]
Elizabeth, I've never tried
to tell you how to run
your life and I never will
but it's obvious
that you're associating
with the wrong kind of people.
- No kidding.
- Alright, then.
Do me a favor
and try it my way.
Hm. Sure, Mary.
Whatever you say.
And, uh, Elizabeth,
your room is this way.
Here you go. Easy. Easy.
Hi.
How's the speech coming?
- It isn't.
- Uh-oh.
You're having trouble
getting started, huh?
I don't know what to say. I've
never written a speech before.
Mmm, it sounds like a severe
case of writer's block to me.
What's that?
Well, it's, it's the inability
to get started.
The, the fear of
the empty sheet of paper.
It's not the paper
I'm afraid of.
It's what I might write on it.
We-well, you needed
something to, um..
take your mind off this fear
so you can start thinking
clearly about what
you have to write.
Like what?
(Mary)
'Well, there've been
a lot of studies done on that.'
Some writers are into jogging
and some are into meditation.
Has this ever happened to you?
Oh, yeah, a lots of times.
- What do you do?
- I eat ice cream.
Alright!
Hi, Tommy.
How was work?
Well, it was great, if you don't
mind being the village idiot.
Oh. What's the matter?
Is something wrong?
I'll tell you what's wrong,
David's attitude.
He's bending over backwards
to prove that he doesn't favor
his little brother.
How?
By letting those jerks get
their laughs at my expense.
They know they can
push me around
and David won't do
anything about it.
Well, did you talk
to him about it?
- 'Sure.'
- What did he say?
"Do what they say
or you're fired."
Oh, come on,
that doesn't sound like David.
Yeah, maybe not the "Old David,"
but the "Boss David"
is on a major ego trip.
[bell tolling]
(Mary)
Look, Elizabeth,
I know that the 's are over
but there's nothing outdated
about doing
something worthwhile.
(Elizabeth)
But I don't even know
what "SST" stands for?
It stands for
"Students for a Sane Tomorrow."
I was a charter member
as an undergraduate.
[chuckles]
Well, Mary, I know
you're trying to help me
and everything, but
I really don't think this--
Elizabeth, look, this is
your chance to meet men
who care about the world
that we live in.
Men who are, are sensitive,
men who are intelligent.
Men who have more to do
with their lives
than, than guzzle beer and
throw food at each other.
Alright, okay, just tell me
where the meeting is.
Hayden lounge, second floor
of the student building.
It's my feeling, we should
emulate the Chinese paradigm.
Surround the cities
from the countryside.
But the idea of a viable
proletarian revolution is dead.
That's where
you're wrong, Sheila.
[scoffs]
What do you think?
Is the revolution dead or
merely in a state of dormancy?
I don't know, maybe it
just took a long lunch.
[all chuckling]
Would the young lady with the
disarming wit care to join us?
Well, is this
"Students for a Sane Tomorrow?"
One and the same.
Why don't you have a seat?
- My name is Herb Dubin.
- Elizabeth Bradford.
Glad you could come, Elizabeth.
Now, what were we talking about
before we digressed
into polemics?
We were discussing
the disco fund raiser.
(Herb)
Oh, yes, yes, yes!
And whether or not
the proceeds should go to
saving the whales or aiding
the Kurdish rebels, right?
Elizabeth, what's your
opinion on the subject?
- The Kurdish rebels?
- 'Yeah.'
Where's Kurd?
[scoffs]
[indistinct chatter]
If you've come here
to talk to me about Tommy
get ready for me
to change the subject.
Now, wait a minute, look,
David, I've never interfered
in your business, right?
Yes, you did,
when you told me to hire Tommy.
Oh. Oh, okay, okay.
But, I mean, aren't you
the least bit concerned
that your brother
is miserable on the job?
Either he can cut it,
or he can't, dad.
- I, I can't hold his hand.
- Yeah, but the other men..
Are giving him
the business, I know that.
I don't know.
What can I do about it?
Well, can't you talk to them?
And make it look like I'm
protecting my little brother?
I'd alienate my entire crew.
[sighs]
Look, dad, I didn't like hiring
Tommy for this very reason.
If he doesn't like
the way he's being treated
he has to handle it
himself or leave.
But we are talking
about your brother.
My grown brother who has to
learn to stand up for himself.
And he has to learn
that by himself.
Yeah.
Maybe you're right.
If I'm not, why are you
here instead of Tommy?
Okay, everybody, that's it.
See you next week.
Keep the faith.
[indistinct chatter]
I thought you might
wanna read this.
What is it?
The SST manifesto.
I wrote it with your sister
and another member
the night we occupied
the administration building.
Oh, I bet it's really radical.
Yeah, for an ideological tract
it has its share
of high points.
Here.
You can have this copy.
Thanks.
Uh, listen, if you went
to school with my sister
then how come you
still haven't graduated?
[chuckles]
You think I'm just
one of those professional
students, don't you?
No, I was just wondering--
Look, I just switched majors,
that's all.
I started out
in political science
and then the w*r ended, so
I got into ceramics, of course.
And then when everybody
was getting back to the land
I switched to agriculture.
I even grew my own food
in the dorm.
- What are you majoring in now?
- Business.
I think it's the only way
to truly understand
the Boojwah mentality.
Of course.
Well, thanks for the book.
Say, Elizabeth, there's
an East-Indian movie playing
at the Biograph tonight.
Would you like to come with me?
[chuckles]
I don't think so, Herb. Thanks.
(Herb)
'You must have other plans.'
[scoffs]
No.
I just don't think that that
movie is quite relevant enough.
What do you mean?
I-it has to be relevant.
It's in subtitles.
Uh.
Hey, little brother,
did you pulled the nails
out of that panel
like I asked you?
No, I haven't had a chance.
I'll get to it after the break.
Hey, man, you got a job to do.
You break after you do it.
Has anybody seen
my hammer around?
It should be
in your tool belt.
I know.
'Has anyone seen it
lying around?'
Now, a worker's never supposed
to lose sight of his tools.
That must have been the first
thing your brother told you.
Thanks for the tip.
Oh, wait a minute.
Is that your tool belt?
[sighs]
[chuckling]
You're pretty funny.
[chuckling]
[all laughing]
[chuckling]
(David)
Okay, boys, break's over.
[grunting]
David, I can't take
any more of this.
Calm down, it's just
hard hat humor.
Look, I didn't come here
for a hard time.
I came here to work
and earn some money.
You can do it.
Now, how can I,
if they won't let me?
I can't fight
your battles for you.
But does it take a battle
to get treated equally?
Come on, stop acting
like a mudder, huh?
Oh, come on, man,
I'm your brother.
Everywhere, but here.
Here I'm your boss!
Okay. Okay, boss.
Start looking for
a new lackey, 'cause I quit.
[intense music]
(male #)
'Hey, look, you need that
fan to operate, Bradford.'
How else you gonna
get the bucks?
Besides, this place
kind of grows on you.
Yeah, like fungus.
Hey, well, at least,
you don't have to put up
with any construction workers.
The Cluck 'N' Chuck
gets a very chick clientele.
[chuckling]
Hey, look, all you gotta do
is to take this bus cart around
clean off the dirty tables.
It's a cinch
once you get it down.
And if anyone
from school shows up
you can hide
in the back room.
Oh, that's just what I need.
- Good luck.
- Hey, where are you going?
Bradford, you're forgetting.
I got promoted to head clerk.
This is your turf now.
You mean I actually
have to wear this thing?
Bradford, you represent
the Cluck 'N' Chuck now.
You have an image to uphold.
[clucking]
[whistling]
Oh. Elizabeth, you're starting
to get me depressed.
Oh, come on.
Every freshman goes
through a rough time.
I would have too if
I'd lasted through a semester.
[scoffs]
Come on, cutie,
snap out of it.
- Please?
- Uh.
I just don't know
what I'm gonna do, Nancy.
Well, I thought you were
gonna join a sorority.
No. Mary's right.
Greek life is just an escape.
Yeah, but, Elizabeth, if that's
what you really wanna do then--
Elizabeth, how did
it go with the SST?
Oh, it was a riot.
Oh, I guess
things haven't changed.
'What do you think?
Are you gonna join?'
- I don't know, Mary.
- What's "SST?"
Oh, it's a student activist
group on campus.
Why would you wanna belong
to something like that?
Well, maybe because
she's interested
in raising her consciousness.
(Nancy)
'Look, Mary, why don't you
let Elizabeth decide'
what she wants to do
instead of you telling her--
Look, why don't you two just
give me a break and shut up?
I'm tired of everyone
trying to run my life for me
and I've had all the frat rats
and intellectual hypocrites
I can handle.
So, just, just leave me alone.
Hey, Nicholas!
How's your speech
coming along?
Am I, uh, proving to be
an entertaining subject?
- Not really.
- Oh.
Uh, well, that's nice.
Uh, may I, uh, see
what you've written so far?
You don't mind if I take
a little peak, do you? Ahem!
"My father sits
all day long at a big desk."
Well, is that all
you've written?
That's all,
because that's all you do.
Oh. You mean, just like
what you're doing right now?
'It's not so easy, is it?'
Especially, when you've got
writer's block.
Now, that's no excuse, Nicholas.
I mean, there are ways
to become unblocked.
You have to utilize
your imagination.
Concentrate on
what you saw at the office.
And on your writing and what
you've learned about writing
trying to write about a writer.
Now, you do this for a while,
give your mind a rest
and all of a sudden
things will clear up.
Okay, but I sure did think
it'd be a lot easier
if you were a fireman.
Oh, well,
I don't know about that.
In the meantime,
I'm going to leave you alone
with your thoughts
and I promise you
nobody's going to
bother you, okay?
[sighs]
- Dad?
- Oh, David.
Hi. Um, is Tommy around?
I brought him his wages
for the two days he worked.
No, no, he's found
himself another job.
Well, uh, will you
give this to him, then?
Oh, yeah, sure,
of course, I will.
[sighs]
Look, dad, I'm sorry about
what happened with Tommy.
I, uh, I tried to be fair,
he just couldn't cut it.
Yeah, well, he said you
that you didn't give him
much of a chance.
I told you I wasn't
going to hold his hand.
Is that my fault that he
couldn't get along in the job?
No, of course not,
but you could've made it
a little easier
for him to try.
That's what every man
in the crew was waiting for.
For the boss to treat his
little brother like a prince.
So, you overcompensated.
You leaned over
backwards to prove
that you weren't showing any
favoritism and all the while
Tommy was getting more
than he bargained for.
You also expect me
to fight his battles for him.
Oh, come on, is that too much
to expect from your own brother?
From his boss, yes. Dad,
I have ten men to think about.
I can't lose them
or their respect.
You see you're so worried
about losing the respect
of those ten men and in
the meantime, you're losing
the respect
of your own brother.
[instrumental music]
[bicycle bell dings]
Ahem.
Excuse me?
Oh. Hi.
Uh..
This may sound stupid
but I-I just wanted to meet
somebody who I wanted to meet.
Oh.
I, uh, guess you just look
like someone I'd like to meet.
[sighs]
Look, is this some sort
of sorority initiation?
No. I, I was just
trying to be assertive.
Really?
Uh, why don't you sit down?
Thanks.
This has never happened
to me before.
I mean, a girl
coming over and..
[chuckles]
It's my first time too.
Really?
You know..
You look pretty familiar.
- Have we met before?
- I don't think so.
No, I recognize
your face from somewhere.
Wait a minute.
Were you in a frat party
the other night?
Uh, you mean
the Bowzer Bacchanal?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I was there.
But I don't remember much.
I was the guy who was
passed out on the floor.
Right next to the empty keg.
- That was you?
- Yeah.
I think I tripped
over your head.
That was you?
Maybe that's why
my head still hurts.
Uh, so are you in that frat?
Uh, no. I really
haven't made up my mind.
I was kind of thinking of
joining the Delta Lambda Chi.
- Oh.
- Are you in house?
No, I was thinking about
joining, but, uh, I don't know.
Look, don't let
the Bowzer Bacchanal
give you the wrong idea.
It really doesn't
happen that often.
'Still a pretty decent way
to meet people, though.'
Yeah, I guess so.
I mean, uh, it's how
we first got together.
So to speak.
[chuckling]
[sighs]
By the way, my name is Jack,
Jack Binder.
Elizabeth Bradford.
It's nice to know you,
Elizabeth.
Same here.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I know it's impossible
to drag you away from your work
but I thought it would be nice
if we have dinner together.
Sure.
Very subtle.
Why, David, I do not know
what you're talking about.
Oh, sure, you don't, you just,
uh, happen to get our dinner
at Cluck 'N' Chuck.
Oh, I was trying
to be economical.
I mean, with Tommy working there
we did get
the % family discount.
- Does he looked miserable?
- I really didn't see him.
Ernie said he was hiding
in the back room.
I'll be back.
- How's the food here?
- I wouldn't know.
I only see it
after it's been eaten.
Tommy, I didn't come here
because I was hungry.
No? I guess you're
a little smarter than I thought.
[sighs]
I came here to admit
that I made a mistake.
Well, that doesn't
do much good now.
Maybe not, but, uh, I wanted
you to know where I stood.
As I recall,
that was pretty far away.
Listen.
Coming between you
and Jean would have done
more harm than good.
If you don't wanna get
hassled by those guys
you've gotta
get their respect.
If I'd intervened
you never would have.
Now, what was I supposed
to do with those guys?
(David)
Stand up for yourself.
Show them that
they can't push you around.
Not because
you're the boss' brother
but because you're not
afraid of anyone.
Look, I went down there
to work.
I didn't go down there to
put up with those jerk's games.
Well, part of work is learning
how to handle those games.
Listen, Tommy,
I know you need money.
And I know I could've
given you more help than I did.
[sighs]
What I'm saying is, uh,
I think you should come back
and give it another try, huh?
[instrumental music]
- So, how's dorm life?
- It's okay.
The real down about living
in the dorm is the food.
That bad, huh?
You know why
most freshmen drop out?
It's not the workload,
it's the meal plan.
Well, listen, if you
need a home-cooked meal
you know who to call.
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
Can I call even if I don't
want a home-cooked meal?
Sure.
Elizabeth, thanks
for being so assertive.
Thank you for being
such a nice guy.
If you think this was nice,
wait till you see me on a date.
I'm downright charming.
You better be.
Uh, little brother.
I don't suppose
you've seen my tool belt?
Oh, what does it look like?
Hey, don't try to be funny, pal.
I'm just trying to help.
Yeah, well, if you see it
let me know.
Oh.
Could that be your tool belt?
[sighs]
Is that your idea of the joke?
No, I just thought I'd give you
a taste of your own medicine
and then see how you like it.
Well, we don't
like it much, pal.
Now, why don't you
do yourself a favor
and climb up there
and get it before I--
Before what? Huh?
You wanna see what I'm made of?
'Come on, one at a time.'
Oh, boy, look at this.
Little brother's
a tough customer these days.
You, first.
Don't you think you're
a little out of your league?
Maybe. Maybe I'll end up
in a hospital.
But, at least, I'll get in
a few licks before I go.
I'm through putting up
with you guys.
Okay. You've made your point.
We're here to do a job,
not fight.
It's fine with me.
Now, what do you say
we get to work?
Okay.
[sighing]
[instrumental music]
[sighs]
P-E-L-A-G-E.
- Ta-da!
- Pelage?
- It's a fur coat of an animal.
- Sure, it is.
Look it up,
she's bluffing.
- Okay.
- See everybody later.
Oh, you're going out
with Jack again?
- Mm-hmm.
- Another frat party?
Oh, no, Mary, something
much more worthwhile.
We're going to
an SST disco fundraiser.
You should go.
Herb Dubin will be there.
Maybe another time, Elizabeth.
- Okay. Buh-bye.
- Bye.
- Goodbye.
- Have a good time.
Uh-oh. "Pelage."
"The fury, hairy coat
of an animal."
[humming]
And don't forget
"G" is a triple letter score.
Wait, "G" is a triple letter..
Nicholas!
Oh, you never told us
how your speech went?
Better than I thought it would.
See? I told you.
See, I was kind of scared
at first that the kids
in the classroom would
think that your job
was nothing special, but
after I heard their speeches
'I knew not to worry.'
Why?
Because their dads jobs are
just as boring as yours is.
[all chuckling]
[theme music]
04x13 - Brotherhood, Sisterhood
Watch/Buy Amazon
The show was modeled on the life of syndicated newspaper columnist Tom Braden, a real-life parent with eight children, who wrote a book by the same title.
The show was modeled on the life of syndicated newspaper columnist Tom Braden, a real-life parent with eight children, who wrote a book by the same title.