01x04 - House Rules

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music]

- Not so fast, Decepticon.

- Well, I'm getting
your Energon, Autobot.

♪ ♪

[drone whirring]

Can't stop me that way, Twitch.

- How about this way? Ha!

- Enjoy the sidelines,
Decepticreep.

♪ ♪

Unguarded Energon?

Too easy.

- Ha!
It's shielded.

♪ ♪

- Autobots always win.

- [gasps]

- Oh!

- You called for a lift
to Loserville?

- Twitch, grab their flag.

[engine revving]

Ugh!

Augh!

- Hey!
Who took the flag?

- Flag? What flag?

[grunting]

- Cough it up, Bike Boy.

- Let him go.

- Mm.

I guess the lesson
we've all learned today

is not to let your guard down.

Decepticons will get you
every time.

- Hey,
we played fair and square.

- Except the cheating part.

Get him, Twitch!

- [grunting]

- Uh, game's over.

You can quit now.

Stop biting your sister!

[pan sizzling]

- I never saw
such a good breakfast.

The perfect start
to a great day.

both: Augh!

- [groaning]

- Family. Meeting.

[transforming pulses]

- [grunting]

- Ugh!

- Accidents happen.

I get that.

But maybe now
is a good time for us

to talk about the house rules.

- I'm sensing a fun-k*ller.

- You already know most of them.

Help out the family.

Use your words
when you're upset.

- And keep hidden
from the outside world.

Remember, we're undercover.

- If ghost agents knew Terrans
existed, they'd take you away.

And nobody is breaking up
this family.

- Speaking of breaking,
we're adding one more rule.

No Bots in the house.

- [grumbles]

- Robby and I have lived
by the rules for ages.

They're easy-peasy.

- Easy is my favorite
type of peasy.

Count me in.

- And me out.

- You haven't heard about
the chore chart yet.

- Oh, Dad.
Not the stickers.

- You get stickers!

- Ooh!

- When you pitch in
with a chore,

you earn a star sticker.

The kid with the most stars
by the weekend gets a reward!

- It's like a game?

- Easy, Twitch.

You're gonna short circuit
our nervous systems

with that happy.

- Well,
I'm still not buying it.

The rules don't even seem fair.

- Most of the time, you barely
even have to think about them.

And when you do,
I'll help you, T.

- [sighs] Fine.

- Shouldn't I be "T"
and Thrash be "Th"?

- Just let them have
their moment.

[birds chirping]

- Thanks for trying, Mo.

But a backyard fort's
really not the same

as hanging out in your room.

- Maybe if I got my fish t*nk
and beanbag chair?

- Oh, better idea.

Bots can't go in the house,
but bikes can.

If I transform, your mom
won't even know I'm there.

- Oh, Mom knows.

Mom always knows.

- Mo, honey!

- See?

- We're heading
to the lumberyard.

Be good.

- Mo, this is perfect!

No Bots in the house
is your parents' rule.

Since they're gone,
we can ignore it.

- I guess that makes sense?

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

Watch your fenders, please.

[engine revving]

You're good.

This way. Stay in first gear.

[engine revving]

[gasps]

- Ahh.

- We'll just sit quietly
and watch pro wrestling.

What can go wrong?

[birds chirping]

- Ahh!

- One, two, three, victory!

- Whoo!

[laughs]

- Morgan Violet Malto
and Thrash--

um, Malto.

- Ugh.

- You two are grounded.

[engine revving]

[engine idling]

[engine revving]

[tires squealing]

[engine revving]

[tires squealing]

♪ ♪

[tires squealing]

[loud crash]

[metal screeching]

- [groaning]

[transforming pulses]

[footsteps stomping]

- Energon scanner.
Could give me a lead on Hardtop.

[grunts]

[electricity crackling]

Ugh.

Energon force fields.

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

[tires squealing]

- [breathing heavily]

Rogue Decepticon
on the package.

Requesting local backup.

[pounding]

- Thanks for the help, Bee.

That repair was so fast.

But you know what would
make it even faster?

Pew-pew.

- Alex, for the last time,
I'm not using my stinger

for DIY projects.

- Think of how fast
we could strip paint.

Cut wood?

Toast tortillas?

- Come on, weed.

[groans]

Ugh.

No reward is worth this.

- You're quitting?

What about the chore chart?

You won't get your star.

- I'll pick
an easier chore later.

- Well, can I finish
the weeding and get your star?

- Knock yourself out.

- ♪ Gonna get a star,
maybe I'll get two ♪

♪ Doing all the chores
Robby hates to do ♪

- [whines]

- [groans]

- Uh-uh.

House rule three:
use your words.

- No phones, no friends, no fun.

We're dying of boredom.

- Augh, I'm lucky I lived
through that suntan.

- Ranger Malto,
Decepticon spotted downtown.

A first responder
is requested on-scene ASAP.

- Have to talk later, kids.

[engine revving]

Got to go ground someone else
who broke the rules.

- If she's going to treat us
like Decepticons,

we might as well
be Decepticons.

It was more fun.

- Mo, it's like you're thinking
my thoughts before me.

- But we're still grounded.

- True.

But nobody said where
we had to be grounded.

- It's kind of assumed
you stay home.

- Decepticons wouldn't.

[transforming pulses]

[suspenseful music]

- [grunting]

[twig snaps]

♪ ♪

[grunts]

[engine turns over, revving]

[both shouting]

- See, Mo, this--this is what
being grounded is about.

Ahh, fresh air!

[engine revving]

[tires squealing]

[engine revving]

[transforming pulses]

[electronic chirp]

- [groans]
Stealing's a lot harder solo.

Too bad there's no place
I can pick up a partner.

What's this?

Bot without a badge?

Hmm, time to make a new friend.

- This will distract
those ghost g*ons.

[loud expl*si*n]
- Huh?

[tense music]

♪ ♪

- Hey!
Grab more extinguishers.

Get a hose.

[transforming pulses]

- [gasps]

- No time to talk.

Follow me if you want
to get out of here alive.

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

- [gasps]

[yelps]

[tires squealing]

[transforming pulses]

- You're lucky
old Swindle found you

before anybody else did.

Rogue Cons don't last long
out here.

- Oh, we're not Decepticons.
I'm Thrash, and this is Mo.

- Are we in danger?

- Not anymore.

But you might want
to stick close.

I won't turn you in.

But Optimus and his
ghost g*ons, ooh.

They're everywhere.

- You know Mr. Optimus too?

Isn't he great?

- Yeah,
that's one word for him.

Hey, what do you say
we ditch half-pint here

and go for a drive?

- Mo's my sister.

Where I go, she goes.

- Good.

You passed my first test.

- Test?

- Yeah.

Nobody gets into my crew
unless they're loyal.

Still, doesn't mean
you got what it takes.

- [scoffs] Uh, we totally do.

And what's so great
about your crew anyway?

- Nothing...if you hate fun.

- We love it,
but we're grounded.

The rules say--

- There's no rules out here,
tiny tot.

I do whatever I want.

And if you roll with me,
you can too.

- You know,
your mom could really

learn something from this guy.

- One ticket to Fun Town.

[suspenseful music]

- [grunts]

[metal clanking]

♪ ♪

- Um, don't those signs
mean no trespassing?

- [grunts]
Oh, yeah.

But you know something?

They don't say
no skate sledding!

- One kind of
requires the other.

[rock music]

[laughs]

- Hold on! Whoo!

[laughs]
Hey, check this out.

Yeah!
- Ha-ha.

Race you to the cornfield.

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

- [laughs]
I love being grounded!

[laughs]

[engine revving]

[birds chirping]

[engine revving]

[laughs]

- Try to keep up, tricycle.

- Hey, I was made for this!

- Yeah!

Um, we can stand
all the corn up again.

Right?

- Ah!

Suffering succotash!

- Whoo-hoo!

[engines revving]

[tires screeching]

- [laughs]
b*at you by a sidecar.

- You sure did.

The only other Bot
I know who can do that...

[sniffles]

Is my brother Hardtop.

- Aw, Swindle.

Are you okay?

- No.

He disappeared while saving
orphans during the w*r.

Being with you makes me miss him
even more.

[wrist-communicator chimes]

- You should come home with us.

Maybe my family
can help you find Hardtop.

- Really?

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

- Really.

[engine revving]

- The more marks the merrier.

[birds chirping]

- No way you did
all of that today.

[engine whirring]

- Can you add one
for egg collecting?

- What?
Where did you get those?

We don't even have chickens.

- Star, Robby.

[engine revving]

- Just so you know,
the prizes for this are lame.

Last time, it was soap.

- Mom said the winner
gets to choose what

Dad's gonna cook all week.

- Oh, man.

Seven days of Dad's bebincas.

Wait.

You don't even eat food.

- I feed off
the thrill of victory.

- Well, get ready to go hungry,
because Robby

is back in the game.

[transforming pulses]

- You are gonna love our family.

- Stop, Bee!

- He's our friend!

- No, he's not.

He's a Decepticon.

[grunting]

- Go, go, go!

- [grunting]

- Remember me, Bumblebee?

We fought
the Battle of the Bay.

I'm gonna enjoy this.

[grunting]

- My beautiful kitchen!

- Ow, ow.

Bumblebee, I said I surrender.

[metallic thud]

[grunting]

Nice family you got here.

I'll take them.

[grunting]

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

[transforming pulses]

[blaster f*ring]

[transforming pulses]

- [groans]

- Bumblebee, please!

Swindle doesn't mean any harm.

- Yeah!

You come out blasting, and you
don't know anything about him!

- Typical Autobots.

All I wanted was a little help.

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

- Sneaking out is one thing,
but bringing

a Decepticon to our home?

- He was nice to us!

And he didn't try to
control us with bogus rules.

- Rules like keep your
identity secret from the enemy?

Obviously.

I'm in hiding too.
Remember?

- You guys never give a Bot
a chance,

not Swindle, not Twitch and me.

- I actually have no complaints.

- You are different
from Swindle.

Cons weren't born
into that life; they chose it.

And anyone who wears
that badge can't be trusted.

- They aren't all bad.

Right, Mom?

You're friends with Megatron.

- That's different.

Megatron has truly changed.

- Which you learned
when you gave him a chance.

Well, I deserve a chance too,

One without a bunch of rules
that stop me from being me.

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

[somber music]

♪ ♪

- You're still grounded,
but we love you.

[wrist-communicator chimes]

- You feel angry, sad, and...

hurt?

- I know we broke
the house rules.

But what if they're wrong?

- Mom and Dad just want
to keep us safe.

- They break rules too.

Your family is hiding us
from ghosts.

Optimus is keeping
Bumblebee secret.

Swindle needs our help
to find his brother.

It's the right thing to do.

- Thrash,
we'd be grounded for life.

- If you were missing,
I'd break every rule

in the world to get you back.

- But Swindle is a Decepticon.

- I can't stay with a family
that won't help someone

just because
they don't like how they look.

[wrist-communicator chimes]

- Then your family
is going with you.

I still think it's a bad idea.

But somebody's got to protect
my little brother.

- [laughs]

- Okay, getting sick now.

[cricket chirping]

- I got these suckers
exactly where I want them.

Right on schedule.

[sobbing]

[transforming pulses]

- Sorry about that back there.

[sobbing]

- Thrash? Mo?

[sobbing]

- If you're not too mad at us

we were thinking we could
help you find your brother.

- That sounds just great.

- Come on. Keep up.

Hardtop's there in that truck.

[camera shutter clicks]

- Oh, you're a genius, sis.

- Here.
Bolt cutters are for the gate.

Or the guards.

Your call.

- We're not hurting anybody,
Swindle.

We'll help you find
your brother, and that's all.

- [groans]

[metallic clanking]

[grunts]

- Any complaints about this?

- No, because you're putting
that back when we're done.

- I don't need to listen
to this pint-sized pipsqueak.

[grunts]

[electricity crackling]

- Uh, where's Hardtop?

- Never mind that.

You, the fleshy one, get in
there and release that lock.

- I'm not doing that.

- [groans]

- Swindle?

- Do what I say or else.

- [grunts]

- [gasps]

[whooshes]

[gears grinding]

- Quit stalling.

Stick your little hand in there.

Hurry it up, runt.

[gears grinding]

- [grunts]

[machinery whirring, hissing]

- Finally.

Hey, Autobrat, give me a hand.

- [grunts]
Nobody threatens my sister!

[clanking and thudding]

Ugh!

[transforming pulses]

[engine revving]

[blaster f*ring]

[grunting]

- Thrash!

- [grunts]

- I'm a big fan, Thrash,

size, speed,
the total Bot package.

Too bad you're with
the Autobozos.

Not too late, though.

Still time to come on
over to the good guys.

Or else.

[blaster f*ring]

- Thanks, sis.

- [grunts]

- Ahh! Ahh!

- Jeez.
Take the hint already.

And now for the gnat.

- [gasps]

[breathing heavily]

[grunts]

- Come out,
come out wherever you are.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

Ah!
- [yelps]

- Not so tough
without your little family, huh?

[loud thud]

- Ahh!
- [chuckles]

I'm gonna enjoy this.

[engine whirring]

[tires squealing]

- Mom rule number one,
don't mess with my babies.

[blaster f*ring]

[tires squealing]

- You better run, coward.

- Oh. Good job calling
for backup, Mosey.

- [groaning]

- Thrash!

- I took Swindle out for you.

You're welcome.

- You okay, baby?
- Yeah.

Thanks for saving me.

And for always being there,
even when maybe

I don't make it super-easy.

- That's what family does.

- Kind of makes
the rules worth it.

I'm sorry for joining
the Decepticons, Mom.

- Decepticons are only bad
if they choose to be.

It's hard to be told what to do.

I know,
but our rules exist to keep

everyone safe and together.

So what do you say?

All in?
both: All in.

- Still grounded?
- Still grounded.

- Last chore left.

First one done
with their half of the lawn

gets the final star
and sweet victory.

- Are we talking or mowing?

- Oh, it's on.

Three, two, one, go!

[drone whirring]

[cutting blade buzzing]

Huh? A tie?

- That's worse than losing!

both: Augh!

Last stars.
- You don't even like bebincas.

- Well,
I've never had them yet.

- Ahem

[drone whirring]

[transforming pulses]

The lawn's mowed forever!

How many stars is that worth?

- None.

But as part of their
-year grounding,

Mo and Thrash can
re-sod that tomorrow.

- Okay, now for a good surprise.

[together]
Whoa.

- So Thrash, Twitch, and Bee
can join us when we're inside.

- [chuckles]

- And Bee has promised
to cook tortillas

with his stinger tonight.

- No, I haven't.

- Worth a sh*t.