01x03 - They Have Been, They Are, They Will Be...

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Kolchak: The Night Stalker". Aired: September 13, 1974 – March 28, 1975.*
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Carl Kolchak is an investigative reporter who would often investigate any activities that are bizarre or supernatural.
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01x03 - They Have Been, They Are, They Will Be...

Post by bunniefuu »

I knew this one was more than
just the biggest story of my life.

It was the biggest story in the
lives of everyone on this planet.

I fought for the story, fought
harder than ever before,

because I knew it was more
than news... much more.

I felt people should know about it, so they
could be prepared when it happened again.

If it's possible to be prepared
for something like this.

It began fairly quietly.
Lincoln Park Zoo, Chicago.

September , : a.m.

Shanka, the zoo's prize cheetah,
was expecting her morning feeding.

It never came.

It started for me on a day which is
supposed to be one of my happiest.

The day of the first game of the first
World Series with the Cubs in years.

The day began badly.

As soon as Updyke took over
as temporary sports editor,

he began memorizing everything...
Batting averages, bases stolen...

He could tell you more about
Hank Aaron and Sandy Koufax...

than you would want to know.

But he forgot other things.

- Ron, where are my tickets?
- What tickets?

Well, the tickets you promised
me for the World Series.

- Well, I don't remember that.
- You don't remember that?

Well, then let me
refresh your memory.

Two short weeks ago, after
your review of the, uh, roller derby,

a hand was clutched around your
throat, attached to one Snuffy Patechenko,

lead jammer for
the Atlanta Amazons,

pounds of furious,
frightening femininity.

- All muscle, no fat.
- Who are you talkin' about?

- Snuffy Patechenko.
- She's a human being. She would have responded to reason.

You do not reason
with pounds...

of outraged, feminine jammer!

Your eyes were going glassy,
as she was cutting off your breath.

I remember your review.
You called her "elephantine."

"Graceless."
"A hippo on casters."

What a thing to say
about a person, you pig.

She had broken someone's arm
the night before.

And she was about to break
your neck... until I intervened.

Telling her that you were a
bleeder, internally. Remember?

Hmm? Of course you do. As the color returned
to those rosy little cheeks of yours,

you promised me one ticket
to the World Series.

- Oh, that explains why I don't remember.
- Why?

- I was delirious.
- Uptight, you give me those tickets,

or I will pick up where
Snuffy Patechenko left off.

I was only joking. Of
course I have your ticket.

- And you call me uptight.
- Thank you very much, Ron.

- What was that?
- One ticket to the ball game.

- Are you going?
- You bet your life I'm going. You crazy?

That's too bad. I guess I'll have to
find someone else to put on this thing.

- What thing?
- Oh, nothing. Just this cheetah missing from the zoo.

You go to the game.
It's all right.

Certainly I'm going to
the game. Certainly.

N-No, no.
That was yesterday's news.

Besides, it was a, uh...
It was a panther.

Oh, no. Yesterday a panther.
Today, a cheetah.

What, are you... Are you saying that
two animals are missing in two days?

Monique, are you
going to the game?

Wait, wait, wait. Wait a
minute. Wait a minute.

- You mean, no report on it? No ransom notes?
- No. No.

No hysterical old ladies
on the horn to the cops?

- Funny, isn't it?
- Yeah, it is.

- Monique...
- Didn't they...

- Didn't they have a couple of animals die there last week?
- Did they?

- Yeah.
- Mr. Vincenzo, I'd be happy to go to the zoo.

- Well, I...
- Okay.

But if that press bus
leaves without me...

- Agreed?
- You know the time schedule. You got a watch.

What do you want from me?

Good-bye, Carl.
Get back to work.

This is the day, fans,

that Chicago
has been awaiting for long years.

After an amazing season,

the Chicago Cubs have clawed their
way to the top of the National League.

They've won the play-offs, and now,
the first game of the World Series.

Code , priority.

Code , priority.
in progress.

Officer down. Raydyne Electronics,
Commerce and th Street.

...to
the rafters. Standing room only.

In a few minutes,
we'll be talking...

It came over
the police band, a Code priority.

Officer down. I caught the address
as static obliterated the broadcast.

It was only a few minutes out of my way. The zoo
would still be there. So would the ball game.

Top of the
first inning, and Juan Bosca of the Cubs...

It's okay. I'm the press.
It's all right. I.N.S.

Carl Kolchak. Go!

Carter! Stegman!
Cover the rear!

What's happening?
What's happening?

- Guy's been k*lled.
- What?

- Somebody tripped the alarm.
- Inside?

Captain, what's goin' on
here? What happened?

- I don't know.
- What's that?

Wh-Wha... What do you...
What do you think happened?

I don't know what happened.
Looks like to me...

I'm gonna take some of that
overdue vacation time I got comin'.

Wait a... What was in there? What
did I see in there? Was that steel?

No. Lead.
Two tons of lead ingots.

Lead ingots? But...

They just disappeared. I mean,
we saw it with our own eyes.

It disappeared
right in front of us.

If you know what's good for
you, you'll disappear too, Kolchak.

- Show him how, Crowley. Go on.
- Now wait a minute!

- Get him outta here!
- Wait a minute. Come on, you guys!

Will you please leave off
the digits? Watch the camera.

All right. Okay.

All right. All right,
you guys. I'll be fine.

I'm goin', I'm goin'. All right? Thanks
very much, fellas. You're very gentle.

Curveball,
taken outside, ball one. Jefferson...

steps out of the batter's
box, surveys the ballpark.

He'd like to get a hold of
one and put it out of here.

Give Boston an early lead. Bosca has his signs.

Here's
the windup, and the pitch...

Line drive and a great catch
by Ortega, the shortstop!

He goes up and one-hands
the ball... -

First half-inning at one to nothing.
The Cubs are coming to bat.

The Cubs are
off to the same great start...

as in their last series
appearance in .

You recall, they b*at the Tigers
in Game One of that ' classic.

Watch your language and turn
off the radio while you're on the phone.

And remember, The Moze Kazan Show is for
you... your complaints and your opinions.

Now, back to the beef line.

My beef is with
the lousy Street Department,

and the way they
screwed up my street.

Mariposa Way... - ...big man for the Cubs.

Isn't a batter, but he had a great
season, hit .... -

When those clowns in the
Street Department repaved Mariposa,

they dumped the leftover
asphalt right on my lawn.

I got this terrible,
black gooey mess all over.

It smells terrible.
I can't get rid of it.

My grandfather fell in it.

We're still tryin' to clean him.

The dog ran through it,
through the house.

The car. I wish you could see
it. It looks like tar, with lumps.

Vincenzo's animal
story was still hanging over my head,

and chances of seeing the
game were fading like lead ingots.

Radio reception was so bad
that listening to the play-by-play...

was nothing short of painful.

But when all was said and done,
my problems were very minor...

compared to the problems
they had at Lincoln Park Zoo.

Very minor indeed.

- It's a viscid mass.
Probably... - "Viscid?"

- Sticky.
- Oh.

Seems to have a lot
of acetone in it too.

My guess is that they planned
to foul up the whole zoo with it,

- and then something frightened them off.
- Who them?

Vandals. Probably the same ones that
sprayed our baby elephant with gold paint.

- Poor Zapata.
- The elephant?

The keeper. Showed up the next
morning after a three-day binge.

First thing he saw was that
elephant.

- Poor Zapata.
- Uh-huh.

Didn't you have a leopard
die here yesterday? Hmm?

- Why?
- Heart att*ck.

- What about the cheetah?
- Heart att*ck.

Heart att*ck.

- Can I use your telephone?
- Mm-hmm.

- What about the panda last week?
- Heart att*ck.

Heart att*ck.

Yeah, hello. I'd like to speak to the
program director of the Moze Kazan Hour.

Yeah, I'll wait.

Listen, besides being stinky, just
what is... What is this gunk, anyway?

- Who knows?
- Yeah. Hello?

Yeah, you had a guy on
the show this afternoon...

that was complaining about
the Street Department dumping...

a whole, big pile of evil-smelling
asphalt on his front lawn.

I'd like his name and address,
please. Uh, well...

Well, he certainly was. I-I heard
him on the radio less than an hour ago.

Yeah, you cut him off
right in mid-sentence.

Well, I agree. You should know who
you have on your show. Yes, thank...

Where'd
this stuff come from?

- Who cares?
- I care.

Well, City Hall.

Yes, I'd like to speak to your
Street Department, please.

About some asphalt paving
that was done on Mariposa Way.

Thank you. Can I peek?

Yeah, hello? Uh-huh.
No record?

What? You must be mistaken. I just
heard the man speak about it on the radio.

Mariposa Way.

I don't know where we're gonna get
another panda. They come from Tibet.

- The Commies have 'em all.
- The Commies.

Most people think
the panda's a bear.

- Actually, it's a raccoon.
- A raccoon. With a heart att*ck?

- Mm-hmm.
- Maybe you fed it too much cholesterol.

Waitin' for the stretch.
The over-the-shoulder look.

And here comes the pitch
to Wachowski.

He swings. It's a
ground ball to short.

Stinks, don't it?

Have you ever seen
anything like this?

Yeah, yeah. It really does. Carl Kolchak
of the I.N.S., Independent News Service.

Mr. Brindle, I heard you on the radio.
Boy, you sure got some fast action here.

Action? One hour after
I make the phone call,

four trucks pull here,
from the Street Department?

What a bunch of idiots.

First they start
with these shovels.

Then they try this chemical
that turns the whole lawn yellow.

Then they try these
flamethrowers...

The things that they use
to burn weeds down with?

Look what they did. They b*rned the
hedge, the tree. They almost got the house.

- Oh, do you mind?
- Oh, no. Please.

Thanks. Did they explain
how it got here?

No. They denied everything. I tell you. This
whole city is going right down the toilet.

And it's not just the Street
Department. It's everybody.

Police included. Did you know that
the crime rate in this neighborhood...

- has gone straight up?
- Would you hold that right there, please?

- Thank you. Yes. That's very good.
- Can I show you something?

Look, come here.

- You see the busted window up there?
- Yeah.

Henry! My neighbor,
Henry Ansgaroni.

Last night he was sitting listening
to records with earphones on?

Someone comes along,
kicks out the window,

and rips out his whole stereo
system while he's listening.

- Do you mean, right off the porch there?
- Almost tore his head off.

- Well, didn't he call the police?
- I called the police.

Know what they found?
The cabinet and the chassis...

in a culvert
in the back of the house.

But they never found the electronic guts.
Mrs. Fusco lives in the house over there?

- Yeah.
- Someone k*lled five of her cats.

Still leaves her with a dozen or
so, because she's one of those kind.

Oh, boy, does that house smell.
Almost as bad as all this gop.

- M-Mr.
- Ara... what's... - Ansgaroni.

- Henry. Henry!
- Henry. Did he see who took his stereo?

The only thing he saw was stars when they
yanked the earphones off his skull.

- Yeah. What time was that?
- Last night. I have to go.

Uh...

Here he comes. Here's the
run for the plate. He slides...

He's in there, and the Red Sox
have the first run of the ball game.

The score, the Red Sox, ,
the Cubs, nothing.

Keeter Hudson,
out on parole and out of money,

endangered the first condition in
an attempt to improve the second.

My purse!

Keeter Hudson, wealthy
beyond his dreams, a happy man.

Keeter didn't know that his
parole was about to be canceled.

Here in the seventh inning,
the Cubs are up. They still trail -,

and that run scored by Boston is growing
taller and taller on the scoreboard.

...pumpin'
the ball by the Chicago hitters.

Hi there!

Boy, have I got
a surprise for you.

Why, you look
absolutely radiant!

There's only one thing that puts that
kind of sparkle into a woman's eyes.

- Baloney.
- Yeah, well, some call it that.

Did you have a nice lunch? A
few drinks ahead of time, hmm?

Don't I wish. I been cooped
up here all day with specimens.

- As you know.
- Yeah. Like this?

Now, I have a suspicion
that this...

is just exactly like that gunk
that you picked up here at the zoo.

- So?
- So guess where I found it?

On a lawn, halfway across town.

Would you like to do a survey
and an analysis of this for me?

I've got things to do.
Lots of 'em.

Oh, now. Come on, now.
Now, Doc Winestock. Bess.

- It is Bess, isn't it?
- Uh-huh.

Uh, Bess, all you have to do...

is just put a little specimen of
this in a test tube and shake it up,

add some chemicals, put it on a slide, stick
it under your scope, and tell me what's in it.

Now, is that asking too much?

Back to the mound, he feeds it
over to Weltzer, and that's it for the Red Sox.

After seven and a half, it remains,
Boston , the Cubs, nothing.

What's the
matter? Aren't you a Cub fan?

One of the absolute staunchest.

If I hurry up, I'll be able to
catch the last few innings.

- I've got a box seat.
- Hurry.

As a matter of fact, I might be
able to get two box seats for tomorrow's game.

If I do the analysis for you,

you're gonna run off
and print some crazy story.

So what? What do you care?
Unless you've been told not to.

It doesn't matter
who does the analysis,

I'm still gonna write my story.
And draw my own conclusions.

However, if you do the
survey, you can guide me...

in what I write. Hmm?

Mm, no. Absolutely no.

Hmm?

All right. Look.
It's obvious.

It's the same as what we found.

- What's in it?
- Hydrochloric acid. Acetone.

- Hydrochloric acid? Why?
- Hydrochloric acid is a digestive juice.

- And acetone?
- And bone marrow.

Bone marrow?
Animal or human?

Animal. All of our animals
who were k*lled here...

showed puncture marks
at the major bone joints.

And every last dram of marrow
had been extracted from their bones.

Hydrochloric...

You mean, they ate
the bone marrow?

It would seem that somebody
ate the marrow and threw up.

- But why?
- I don't know, Mr. Kolchak.

I don't either.

And the ball game is
over. The first game of the World Series...

finishes on a tremendous play...
How about that, fans?

The fastest game
in World Series history.

- You know, you shouldn't have used infrared film.
- Yeah. That's all I had.

- Look, something's comin' out, see?
- Yeah.

Yeah. Be careful. Be very
careful with this. It's very important.

Don't hassle technicians, Kolchak.
This takes scientific precision.

A few seconds off,
and you get nothing.

Which is just
what you got: nothing.

Two tons of lead. What
could use two tons of lead?

- God's pencil?
- Wait, wait, wait, don't!

- What are you doing? What are you doing, ya dum-dum?
- It's garbage!

Now, listen. You reprint that thing.
This is very important. Do you hear me?

And you put 'em in the files and you lock
'em up. I'm making 'em your responsibility.

- Big deal.
- Yeah. Big, big deal.

- Gordy.
- Oh, hi, Kolchak. I guess you heard we blew the game.

Cubs looked great, right up
to the top of the seventh.

Yeah. Well, I guess I'll
see it on a sports TV recap.

I've been trying to call you.
Did you know, last week,

- the number that won the stiff lottery was --?
- Yeah, so what?

You had --.
You missed by a hair.

You been tryin' to reach me all
day to give me that good news?

Mm-hmm. I want to keep your
faith up. You see, you can win.

- So keep pluggin'.
- Yeah, Gordy, listen. Do you have the autopsy report...

on the guard who was k*lled
out at Raydyne Electronics?

- Start pluggin' before you ask any questions.
- That's what I figured.

- I'll give you -- and --. Okay?
- Whatever. Whatever.

- Now, what about the autopsy reports?
- You know,

I've been thinking of changing the
lottery from birth year to time of death.

- I mean, what's your opinion?
- Gordy, the autopsy report, huh? ¿Donde esta?

Max, listen. Bring
the reports down to my office...

I'm telling you for the last time.
There are no special favors for anyone.

- You get it with the rest of the reporters.
- What are you talkin' about?

Hi. Hi, Gordon. Kolchak.
What's goin' on?

For one thing, I'd like to find
the autopsy report on the guard...

who was k*lled
at Raydyne Electronics.

- That's what I'd like to get.
- What's all the hysteria? By all means.

I'll be glad to give it to you.
You got a pencil and paper?

I got my tape recorder here.
Go on. Start talkin'.

Okay. Here we are.

"Subject, Lloyd Reynolds.
Male Caucasian. years of age.

"Prior history of myocardial infarction.
Immediate cause of death, cardiac arrest.

"Blood sample, normal.
No external wounds.

"Stomach contents indicate
ingestion of heavy meal...

several hours before death."
That seems to be it, Carl.

- Uh-huh. I'd like to look at the body.
- That's not permitted, Kolchak.

I'm sorry, Kolchak. I can't permit you to go
in the drawer. That's against the rules here.

You know, you're right. I'm
sorry. I really am. I apologize.

I guess my reporter's zeal
got the better of me.

Well, Carl. I think this is kind
of a landmark in our relationship.

Stanley, I couldn't
agree with you more.

- So long.
- I'll put that away, sir.

"Prior
history of myocardial infarction.

"Pacemaker on the chest flap
in good condition.

"No evidence of cardiac arrest.

"Inserting trocar into sternum
for marrow sample.

"Hey, Philip. Look-Look
at this. It's bone dry.

"If you'll pardon the expression,
there's no marrow. None.

Let's go for the spinal
column base with the trocar."

September , : p.m.

Leon Van Heusen. Single,
ambitious, slightly paranoid.

By day, a television repairman, by
night an observer... a man with a purpose.

The author of Mathmatico,
a universal language...

that Leon has refined for use
in unconventional communication.

Unfortunately, on
September , at : p.m.,

Leon learned
the oldest word in the universal language...

I tell you that myself and
every member of my staff are...

pulling double shifts, as we
always do in a situation of this kind.

Every department of this
city's law enforcement facility...

is operating at peak efficiency.

And I anticipate the arraignment
of certain, um, major suspects...

within, uh...

Well, within hours.
Sorry.

Now, no questions at this time,
ladies and gentlemen, if you please.

And because I'm sure that you all
know Raydyne Industries is involved...

in some very classified work
on m*ssile guidance systems.

We're talking about national
security, ladies and gentlemen.

Uh, Captain!

Thank you, Captain. What is
the department's official position...

upon the rumored puncture marks
in the body of the Raydyne guard?

There's absolutely no foundation
for any such rumors, Mr. Kolchak.

Wh-What about those
missing lead ingots? Two tons of them?

Were they simply just misplaced?

I have no reason
to believe otherwise.

No reason? Well, you were
there. You saw what I saw.

- Those lead ingots, they just...
- You saw... what, Mr. Kolchak?

Well, I know it's gonna
sound very funny...

Yes, it probably will. So if you
don't mind, may we continue?

You people are journalists.
Responsible journalists, I'm sure.

But occasionally, in your zeal
to get the facts before the public,

you sometimes forget
that you can...

impede the course
of justice by...

creating dissension,
terrifying the citizenry,

and, more important,
losing your own credibility.

Uh, Captain.

Sir, Raydyne Electronics may
have a national security problem,

but what about the security of
Al and Fred's TV Repair Shop,

and what about
Henry Ansgaroni's stereo,

and what about Mrs. Shank's
microwave oven?

I have no idea what you're
talking about, Mr. Kolchak.

But I'm sure that's not unusual,
is it, ladies and gentlemen?

No, but what issunusual is that,
in the last two days, in this city,

electronic parts have become about
as desirable and rare as diamonds...

Or bone marrow.

I have no
comment on that at this time.

Quill and I weren't
the only ones with watches that didn't work.

Everyone that had been at Raydyne
Electronics had the same problem.

Question: What would stop
wristwatches at exactly the same time?

Answer: An electromagnetic
field so strong...

it might swing a compass
needle off true north...

to the final truth.

Mm, marvelous!

- Delicious, Rich. Just delicious.
- Merci, monsieur. Bon appétit.

Carl! Come on in!
You care to join me?

- No, no thanks.
- Courtesy of the editor of the Times.

He's a sucker for the Cubs.
Oh, ho! Mmm.

- Tony, I'm onto something big.
- Yeah.

- Very, very big.
- Yeah.

Quill has been covering it up,
under the name of national security.

- Covering what up?
- A mess of lead ingots, stacks,

that disappeared
before our very eyes.

A stone wall that exploded
outwards, with no sound whatsoever.

- Totally silent!
- Mm-hmm.

And the dead guard with all the
marrow sucked out of his bones.

Oh, Tony, I'm sorry. Forgive me, I... Maybe
I shouldn't tell you about that... now.

No. No, no, no, Carl. You
got a story to tell, tell it.

You know, I... Th-That
doesn't bother me. Go ahead.

All right. Now, electronic
parts have been disappearing...

for the last two days,
all over this city.

Quill tried to cover that up
under national security too.

Are you beginning
to make the connection?

Mmm, no.

Then I'll have to start at the beginning,
with the autopsy on the dead panda.

Carl, start somewhere
else, will ya?

Tony, listen. Are you sure that
you want me to talk about this now?

Oh, yeah, sure. Cast iron
stomach, Carl. Cast iron.

- Go ahead.
- Every animal that was k*lled at the zoo...

had its marrow sucked out of its bones,
just like the guard at Raydyne Electronics.

And in every case where there
was a dead human, or a dead animal,

there was a puddle... a pile...
Of bluish, greenish, black bile.

I-It really stinks, Tony. I
mean, it's rancid. Sickening.

And here's the capper.
This gooey substance...

is composed of a strange
combination of chemical elements.

- Hydrochloric acid,
acetone and... - Bone marrow.

Bone marrow! Right!
Now, guess where...

this strange, unusual
combination of elements occurs.

Nowhere in this world.

I knew you were going to say
that, Carl. I knew it! I really did!

- You want proof.
- Yeah.

Be right back.

- Cervelle aux Bercy.
- What's that?

Brains.

Monique?

Monique?

You gave away my pictures!

You come out of there, or I'm gonna
suck the marrow out of your bones!

That is no inducement for me
to come out, Mr. Kolchak.

Be reasonable. What could I do?
They had on suits, ties, credentials...

They had some forms from the Internal
Revenue. They knew all about me.

- They threatened an audit.
- So, you gave away my pictures?

I had to! They pull an audit on
me, and I go off the nearest bridge.

Why should you be concerned
about the I.R.S.?

You're just out of college. You've
only been working for a couple...

You did file
an income tax return?

They didn't look that good
after they were dried.

They looked fake. I've
seen better in magazines.

- Why did you let 'em do it? Those guys in the gray suits.
- Do what?

They stole the tape
that I stole.

Those are the same guys that were out at
Raydyne. Now they're following me around here.

Please. Don't do this
to me, Carl.

I don't need another U.F.O.
story. I've got enough problems.

I didn't say U.F.O.

You said U.F.O.
They said U.F.O.

Carl, I was just speaking generically.
Now, please, Carl. Be reasonable.

Remember what happened the last time we
put out one of these kooky scare stories?

All the phones were tied up.
Police station phones were tied up.

Police came down on me
like a ton of bricks!

Carl, please.
Leave it alone, will ya?

Sure. Sure, Tony.

Why don't you have another seltzer
and go on home and go to bed?

I don't want another seltzer.

Have you
ever tried to report a U.F.O. sighting?

I'll save you the trouble. There is not a
single government agency still in existence...

that will admit to any
interest in the subject.

If you seem to be insistent, they
will refer you to a private organization.

Um, I'm very excited...

to be able to share with
you all this evening...

my experiences
with the flying saucer.

Uh, I only hope that I can
remember all the details,

because it was...
It was very, very exciting.

I only spent about an hour
aboard the saucer itself.

- Do you want an application?
- To what?

- I... Wait.
- And then they served me something that tasted...

Oh, not unlike ginger ale
and bourbon.

And that's when, uh...

their leader, a very smart-looking
alien, got a little fresh with me.

But when I let him know
that I was firm... determined...

He kept his extensions
to himself.

It was quite exciting.

Have any of your members reported
any sightings the last few days?

Well, Leon Van Heusen, one of our members,
called in an Opus last Monday night.

- An "appis"?
- No, Opus. Opus is, "One Party, Unverified Sighting."

- Oh, yes.
- Oh, here it is. Here it is.

I wonder why he didn't petition
the authentication committee.

- Well, Leon's a touch paranoid. Yes. Yes.
- Ohh.

- Yes, the Opus was...
- Shh!

"The destructive star,
called Wormwood,

is not a star
but a m*ssile."

Now, upside down and
backwards, it reads "Doomwrom."

Doomroom? Doo...

- That doesn't spell "Doomwrom."
- Well, it certainly does.

- The Opus was sighted at Snake, uh, Park?
- If that's what it says.

- "Snake Rock," here. Yes, Snake Rock.
- Does that spell "Doomwrom?"

I don't know. How many
members in the Highland Park area?

- Just Leon. Yes.
- Just Leon. And where is this Snake Rock?

Snake Rock. There's a bus
that... No, the bus doesn't run there.

- Do you have a car?
- Yes, I have a car.

Excuse me, Mr. Gough. I don't
understand what you're talking about.

- "Doomwrom." It certainly does.
- My dear. My dear.

- Backwards and upside down.
- My dear, it's plain... It spells "Droomdrum."

- No, I am sorry, but... - Okay,
there are two... Call a cab!

Your present location
is the third planet of our star system.

We are peaceful. I will now
address you in Mathmatico.

The universal language.

This is Riley, at the planetarium. You
better get a squad over here right away.

Hey, old-timer, I didn't
mean to disturb you...

Let's get some lights
on in here.

I think there's some switches
over by that console panel.

- Get away from that console! Don't go near that thing!
- What the hell are you doin'?

- Paul?
- He's dead.

Any luck over there?
Get some lights!

Get back! Get away
from that thing!

Back up!
Get outta there.

What are you guys pointin' at? You can't
see anything anyway. Listen, I can stop it.

- Stop it? Stop what?
- I don't know, but whatever it is, it can't stand light.

I was alone with it in here, and I stopped
it with this. It was lookin' at maps!

- Map? What kinda map?
- Maps! Maps. Star maps. Look up there.

See? Galaxies.
See, look. Over there.

Well, there's nothin' over
there. I don't see anything.

Anybody see anything? Huh?

- What? What do you see, Kolchak?
- I don't see anything either.

But that doesn't mean
that there's nothing there.

Somebody throw a net over Kolchak, will ya?
I think he's about ready for the rubber room.

Quill, I talked with Dr. Heinz Wollenweider
over at the Fermi Research Institute.

Now, he told me that the
human eye cannot detect...

certain portions
of the light spectrum.

Now, we know that X-rays exist.
We know that cosmic rays exist.

The fact that we can't see them
doesn't mean they aren't there!

If you can't see it,
how do you know it's there?

Infrared film.
It's sensitive to heat.

Heat makes the image.

The flash from this flashgun
saved my life just now.

Now, either you go out and talk
to your friends from Washington,

or wherever they're from,
or I will.

Wait a minute, you...

You mean, the light from that flashgun
of yours stopped this... whatever?

- Dead in its tracks. If it had made any.
- Yeah?

All right, we'll see about that.

Stand by here.

All right, you people.
Gather round here, now.

Get that mobile unit with
the lights. Bring 'em in here.

And hit the entrance
with those big lights.

Where... You're nuts. You're
gonna get your heads taken.

Ted, get
that man over there.

Somebody get on that fire.

Eddie? Move this out of
here and get an ambulance in.

- Quill...
- Yeah? Kolchak.

There's gotta be an explanation for this.
There's gotta be. Just let me figure it out.

You gotta figure out how you're
gonna earn a living from now on,

because of now, you're through
as a paperboy in this town.

It had to be the camera. It
had to be! What else could it be?

The lights! The lights
just irritated it.

- They wanna talk to you, Captain.
- Yeah. All right.

Get if from
the other side there!

The recharger!

Hit the front part up there too.

Quill! Captain, I got it.

No, look, i-i-it was the
camera, but it wasn't the light.

Is this another one of your
stupid theories, Kolchak?

Huh? You don't know when
you're well off, do you?

No, listen. No. No. It
was the battery recharger.

The nickel cadmium batteries in
there. They emit a high-pitched whine.

Listen.

It hurts, doesn't it, huh? Who
knows what it sounds like to it.

You know what I'd like to do to
you, Kolchak? And I'd do it, too,

only you're gonna be dealt
with at a much higher level.

I don't care. I don't care.
Just get on the walkie-talkie...

and tell your friends from Washington,
I figured out how the camera works.

Those people are gonna
do to you what me...

and no other cop in this
city's ever been able to do.

They're gonna take care of you
good. Once and for all, Kolchak!

I don't care about your threats.
Just get on the horn and tell 'em.

- Don't be stupid, please!
- You want me to get on the horn?

Get outta here.

They tried to make a
little park out of the woods near Snake Rock...

Daffodils, tulips... but they
couldn't get anything to grow.

There was an area shaped
like a saucer at the bottom.

If you want to see it,
you'll have to hurry.

Our park commission decided overnight
to do extensive reclamation work...

in that particular spot.

They're filling it in
with concrete.

"What happened? It's all
a point of view really.

"A traveler has a breakdown, stops to fix
it, gets a road map, has a bite to eat...

"and goes on his way...
It's happened to all of us.

"This traveler happened to be
light-years off his course,

"instead of miles.

"As for me?

"Well, I haven't heard from
the boys in the sedan...

Yet."
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