09x11 - World's Best Dad / The Good Old, Bad Old Days

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[Theme music playing]

♪ Word up,
it's word girl ♪

♪ Word up,
it's word girl ♪

♪ Flying at the speed of sound,
vocabulary that astounds ♪

♪ From the planet lexicon ♪

♪ Watch out, villains,
here she comes ♪

♪ Faced with a catastrophe,
we need the living dictionary ♪

♪ Her superior intellect
keeps the crime world in check ♪

Go, girl.

♪ Huggy face is by her side ♪

♪ Vocabulary a mile wide ♪

♪ She'll make sure
that crime won't pay ♪

♪ And throw some mighty words
your way ♪

♪ Word up, it's word girl ♪

Word up.

♪ From the planet lexicon ♪

♪ Watch out, villains ♪

♪ Here she comes ♪

♪ Word girl ♪

Narrator: listen for the words
"attempt" and "combine."

It's a summer morning
at the botsfords',

And the house
is buzzing with activity.

Or not.

[Helicopter hovers]

It's here!
It's here!

Hooray. Why? What's here?

The world's biggest book
of world records.

This book is amazing.

It lists every
world record ever.

For example,
did you know
the record

For longest time
riding a unicycle
is hours?

Hours? Back in
high school,

I was pretty good
on the old one-wheeler.

And the longest
I could stay up
was seconds.

Ooh, here's a record

For the most watermelons
balanced on someone's head

At the same time-- .

Watermelons.
In high school,
the most watermelons

I could ever balance
on my head was .

Huh.

I was in a bunch of clubs.

Here I am in
the fancy-cooking club.

Ooh, and here I am in
the backwards alphabet club.

Ho ho ho, man. Look at me
in the stilt-walking club.

[Bob chitters]

Yeah, I was good at
a lot of silly things
back then,

But I was never
the best in the world.

The best in the world.

Hey, look.

There's a note at
the bottom of the page.

Ahem. "There is currently
no world record

"For unicycling
and watermelon balancing

At the same time."

Ahh, dad, if you can do
those things separately,

Maybe you could
combine them

And get
a world record.

I've always wanted
a world record.

To be the best in the world.

The best in the world.

Narrator: later,
at the grocery store...

I'm so excited about
being your coach

For this
world-record attempt.

With enough practice,
I'm sure you're going
to be the best.

Wait a sec.
Who's going to be
the best?

Huh. To think
just by unicycling

While balancing watermelons
on my head,

I can set
a new world record.

So becky's dad is going for
a world record.

That would make him
the best at something,

And I'm always the best
at every something.

I'm victoria best!

So the world-record judge

Will be meeting us
in the park in days.

Out of my way. Move.
[Frightened chitter]

Huh. I feel like
I'm missing something here.

Narrator:
oh, you definitely are.

Days later, after lots of
hard work and practice...

In order
for your father's
attempt to qualify

As an official
world record,

He will have to balance
the watermelons on his head

While unicycling
for full seconds.

Anything less
could be pure luck.

Dad, are you in the zone?

I am currently
in the zone.

Let's do this.

And go.

[Ticking]

[Creaking]

Ok, dad,
find your groove.

I found my groove.
I am in the groove.

This is my groove. Oh, no.

D-ow!

Seconds. Tim botsford,
I declare you to be

The world's
greatest unicycling
watermelon balancer.

You did it, dad.
You're the best
in the world.

The best in the world.

The best in the world.

Is he the best,

Or am I the best?

Hey, she has a unicycle
just like mine.

Wait a minute.

You might want to start
your watch again, mr. Judge.

And then you might
want to find a chair,

Because we're gonna
be here a while.

Victoria,
what is going on?

Isn't it obvious?

I'm about to b*at
your dad's world record

For unicycle
watermelon balancing.

Seconds.

That's right, seconds.

I'll be taking that.
But--yeah, but--

Tim botsford,
I hereby declare you

To be a non-
world record holder.

Congratulations,
victoria.

Yes, I am the best!

Ugh. Come on, dad.
Let's go.

Hah! Hah! Hah!

Ok, this is getting boring.

Narrator: the next morning,
back at the botsfords'...

Ah, morning, dad.
What's for breakfast?

Breakfast burritos.

I got to warn you,
they probably won't win

The world record for
best breakfast burritos

Because the guy
who cooked them isn't
the best in the world

At anything.

Dad, I'm sorry victoria
took away your world record.

Hahh.

I think I have
just the thing
to cheer you up.

Bob, a hand here.

[Bob chitters]

[Becky strains]

You're so good at
so many unusual skills,

I bet we can find some other
world-record combination

That nobody
has attempted yet.

Becky, I've heard you use
the word "combination"
a few times,

And to be perfectly honest,
I have no idea
what it means.

Oh, if you combine things,
it means you mix them together,

And combining things together
makes a combination.

For example,
this breakfast burrito

Is a delicious combination
of eggs, beans, and cheese

All wrapped up
in a tortilla.

I see. Thanks for
that combination

Of defining the word
and complimenting
my cooking.

Ooh-hoo. So,
what other combinations

Did you find
in your record book?

Hmm...oh, here's one.

Nobody has combined
blowing bubbles

While doing
russian folk dancing
with high kicks.

Becky, why stop
at one world record?

Let's attempt a bunch
of combinations.

Yeah, let's do it.

Narrator: later,
at victoria best's house...

Congratulations,
victoria.

Your name's
in the back there
somewhere.

Wait a minute.

What's this down here?

Oh, those are
some combination of skills
that nobody has tried yet.

But I'm told mr. Botsford
will be trying some

In the park on friday.

Is that so?

Well, I will be
trying all of them
in the park on friday,

And I will be the best.

General smoochington,
let's get to work.

[Snorts]

Narrator: a few days later,
back at the park...

My dad will be attempting
world records today,

Starting with doing the most
one-finger push-ups

While simultaneously ironing
a sensible button-down shirt.

Mm...proceed.

Ok, index finger,
let's make history.

Ahh, victoria. She's back.

Oh, hi. Am I too late
to win all the combination
world records

And prove once and for all
that I'm the best?

May the best me win.

Ah, ignore her, dad.

Ow! One.

, , , Yawn.

You can give up
whenever you want.

Why tire yourself out?

Yaah.

Plaque, please.

Victoria best,
by the power vested--

Yeah, great speech.
Now everyone stand back.

I'm about to break
another record.

Smoochington?

Ahh, but I was
going to attempt

The burlap-sack bounce

While painting
a self-portrait blindfolded.

Come on.

I don't know
what attempt means,

But I'm definitely
going to try it.

The word "attempt"
actually means "to try"

Or make an effort
to achieve something
or finish something.

For example, you're
going to try or attempt

To sack bounce while painting
a self-portrait blindfolded.

I knew what the word
"attempt" means.

I was just seeing
if you knew.

Yeah, sure you did.
And to show you...

I'm prepared to attempt
all of the world records

Listed in the book
that nobody has
ever attempted.

Sir, are there any
world-record skills

That aren't in the book?

No, there are not,
and I should know.
I'm a judge.

But what if I made up
a new one?

Hmm, I suppose
I would consider it.

Ok, what about baking
the world's fastest soufflé?

It's been done.
While reciting
the alphabet backwards?

That's been done, too.
While standing on stilts.

No, w--wait.
That combination has
never been attempted.

Ahh, becky, remember
back in high school,
I was the president of the--

Fancy-baking,
backwards alphabet,
and stilt clubs. I know.

You can do this, dad.

I'll be right back
with the supplies.

Oh, this is so unfair.

I didn't think up any
new skill combinations,

So I didn't
practice any.

How can I be the best
if I didn't practice?

Let's see,
it goes z, y, x.

Unless
maybe I can get someone
to show me how to do it.

I won't need
to practice at all.

T, s, r, q, p...

O...

Ha ho ho.

[Chitters]

Oh, man.
Come on, bob.

Word up.

Ok, becky's dad, show me
how to cook a soufflé

While reciting
the alphabet backwards
on stilts.

Well, the key to any souffée
is preheating the oven.

Victoria best,
unhypnotize my da--

This citizen who is
probably somebody's dad

Right now.

Nuh-uh, word girl.

Not until I've learned his
combination-skill secrets.

Z, y, x, w, v, u...

Yaah. Yaah.

Huggy, time for
emergency plan number .

The old huggy face
super face hug.

Yaah.
A.

[Chitters]

Monkey headed
for my face!

C, b, a-h-h-hey,
where am i?

I give the best hugs,
but this is pretty good.

[Ticking]

Becky, I don't
speak gorilla.

What's he saying?

He's saying, "d, c, b, a."

[Ding]

Only seconds.

That's definitely
a world record.

Aw, seconds?

There's no way
I can do it
that quickly.

Now he's saying
he's so happy

Because victoria never
lets him win at anything.

It's a very emotional
moment for him.

Oh, and for you, too.

I'm sorry, dad.

Narrator: the next morning,
back at home...

♪ La da da dit dee,
I'm scrambling eggs ♪

Good morning, becky.
How did you sleep,
kiddo?

Hey, do you want eggs
on this beautiful, amazing day?

Oh, yes, please. Wow,
you're in a good mood.

Well, I did
some thinking
and decided

That I am incredibly happy.

In fact, I may have
the world record

For world's
happiest dad.

Aw, thanks, dad.

You sure know how to put
a good spin on things.

Spin on things.

Spin on things.

Becky, did you know
that I was
the president

Of my high-school
plate-spinning club?

No. You never mentioned
that one.

I bet there's
a combination world record

That involves plate spinning
that nobody has tried yet.

Oh, oh, oh.

We could combine
plate spinning
with bunny hopping.

Through hoops.

Narrator: and so becky
and her dad

Spent all week attempting
to set a world record,

But ended up having
a great time together instead.

Join us next time for the show
that combines awesome action

And the world's handsomest
narrator you've never seen

On "word girl."

♪ Word girl ♪

Hello.
I'm beau handsome,

And this is...

"May I have a word?"

As usual, the player
who correctly defines

Today's featured word
will win a fabulous prize.

Let's play.

May I have a word?

Yes, you may.

Today's featured word
is "inflate."

To give you a clue,

Here are some clips
from "word girl"

That show the meaning
of the word.

[Game show music playing]

[Ding]

Yes, emily.

"Inflate" means
to puff up
with air or gas.

In that
second clip,

Word girl
was inflating
her cheeks,

And in
the last one,

Huggy was
inflating some gum
to blow a bubble.

That is correct.

Huggy, show her
what she's won.

[Applause]

An official
beau handsome

Giant inflatable head.

Audience: ooh.

Where is it?

[Chitters]

Well, can-can you-can you
take it out of the box?

Ah, huh. The giant
inflatable head

Isn't quite as impressive
as I'd hoped.

Well, emily, you're
still going to have
a great time with it.

I am?

Absolutely.

Ok, that's it
for today's episode.

See you next time on...

"May I have a word?"

♪ Word girl ♪

Narrator: hey, kids.

Listen for the words "hazy"

And "reminisce."

It's another beautiful,
bright sunday morning,

Which is great

Unless you're out
looking for stars.

See anything yet?

Scoops, I know we have to
finish our star chart
for school,

But we're not gonna see
any stars now.

It's too early.

You're right.
You're right.

How about now?
[Chitters]

Relax. We just need
one clear night in--

Watch out!
Coming through.

Look alive
on the sidewalk.
[Siren wailing]

Yeah! Hey, hey!

[Siren stops]

Nothing can stop me now.

Come on, bob. Word up.

Stop, thief.
He took my book.

Did you kids see
a really big guy
run past here?

Looked like
a butcher?

You mean the butcher?

That's him. He stole
a very important book
from me,

And I need
to get it back.

Can you help?

Oh, sorry. Sheldon.
Sheldon zellman.

This shouldn't
take too long.

Word up.

Narrator: moments later,
at the museum...

The missing sausage links.

Ho ho.
Breakfast is served.

More like
justice is served.

Word girl. Good one.

Thanks. Now step away
from the sausages

And put your hands up.

Ehh, nah.
I don't feel like it.

Don't
feel like it?

What do you mean
you don't feel like it?

This is how
we always do it.

"How to defeat
a pesky superhero.

"Step one--first,
take care of the sidekick

With the big mouth."

Ok.

Uber ham!

Remember last week
at the bank?
[Chitter]

Huh?

[Moans]

Now, if you'll excluse me.

Swedish meatball surprise!

Uh, the word is "excuse,"
and--whoa!

Well, toodle-oo.

Uhh.
Did you catch
the butcher?

No. He got away.

I wonder what's so special
about that book.

Hey, where's sheldon?

Oh, he said he had
to go catch a bus.
He left you a note.

Listen, if you want to know
what's so special
about that book,

Come down to the home
for retired heroes
and villains

Today at lunchtime.

Oh, and bring soup.

Bring soup?

So, uh, want to get started
on that star chart?

Just, um,
start without me.

I'll make it up to you,
scoops, I promise.

Here, huggy can help
until I get back.

[Chitters]

Sure, you can.

[Shrieks]

Narrator: later...

Uh, hello.

Did you bring the soup?

Myron, come see
what the kid brought.

Huh, I'm coming,
I'm coming.

So, first off,

Hard to believe
it's really me, right?

Heh heh heh heh heh.

Uh...

I am the blue blazer.

[Coughing in background]

You never heard of me?

Come on, the blue blazer?

I was one of the most
dangerous villains
in the whole city.

Uh, guess it was
a little before my time.

Huh. I told you
she wouldn't know.

She has no idea
who you are.

You be quiet.
I have to live
with this guy.

Word girl,
meet my longtime rival

And one of the biggest,
bravest superheroes
you'll ever meet--

Razzmatazz.

You can call me razz

Or myron.
Myron rosenstock.

I'm really sorry
I haven't
heard of you guys,

But I'd love
to learn more
about your history

If you'd care
to reminisce.

Even better. We'll tell you
a super-terrific story

From back in the old days.

Oh, well, that's what
it means to reminisce.

It's kind of
a dreamy way
of saying,

"To talk about things
from the past."

Oh, well, we do that
all the time.

Myron, let's reminisce.

Ok. I remember it--

Sheldon,
get out of the way.

I remember it
like it was yesterday.

I was just leaving the deli
with some nice, fresh bagels

When suddenly I see this one,
the blue blazer,

Trying to rob
an armored car.

They were just going to give
all that money to the bank.

Ooh, what a waste.

Sheldon, now you're
mr. Big-time
storyteller?

Huh.

So I sprang into action.

And razzmatazz,
I took out the evil blue blazer

With one fell swoop,
leaving him empty-handed.

Wow, that's
a great story, guys,

But I still have to
catch the butcher
and finish my homework,

So maybe you could
tell me more about
this missing book?

Book?

Oh, yes.

I'm reminiscing about
all the things

We did in the past
and writing a book about it.

The butcher.

He was here at the home
for the retired heroes
and villains

To see his daddy.

Oh, yes, kid potato.

Pretty good guy
for a bad guy.

[Snores]

And then the butcher
snuck in here and took it.

He really got the best
of you, huh, kiddo?

No. It just seemed like
he had a better plan
than usual.

And just when I was
making my whole

"You'll never get away
with this" speech,

He, uh, well,
he got away.

[Both chuckling]

What? What's so funny?

He pulled the oldie
st. Louis toodle-oo.

That's tip number one
in the book.

Tip number one?

Hey--hey, what's this book
of yours called anyway?

"How to b*at
a smarty-pants superhero

At his or her own game"

By sheldon zellman

And myron,
who helped a little
but not really.

What? This is a book
about how to defeat
heroes like me?

Also, I think maybe
he stole my glasses.

Oop, never mind.

[Alarm rings]

Ahh, an alarm

At the...museum
of enormous metal food?

When did that open?

Last week.

They're about
to display the priceless
golden brisket.

Guys, I'm gonna go
get that book.

Word up.

[Chitters]

"Tip number --

"Apply a little butter
to the scene of the crime

To help grease
your getaway."

Not so fast, butch--ooh!

Heh heh heh!
Ha ha ha ho ho!

Oh, man, this book
is the greatest.

Ugh. This is ridiculous.

Word--ohh!

So, ho ho,
he used the old

Butter-on-the-floor
trick, huh?

The chattanooga
turnaround.
A classic.

Listen, I'm running
pretty short on time.

Are you sure
there aren't any trips
or tricks in your book

That would help me out?

You know,
like in your story.

The clever way
razzmatazz defeated
the evil blue blazer?

Evil blue blazer?

Huh? Is that
what we told you?

Hmm.
No, no, no.
You've got it backwards.

You were the good guy.
I was the villain.

I think.

Wait. What?

Hmm, the blue blazer.

That certainly sounds like
a good guy, doesn't it?

Are you two serious?

I've got to say,
it sounds like your memories
are a little hazy.

Hazy? I never heard
such a word.

What's with this hazy?

Hazy means something
is hard to see,

Hard to understand
or not clear.

For example,
the details
of your story

Keep changing.

It's not clear what
the real story is,
so it's hazy.

Or like the clouds
in the sky right now.

Even though
it's getting dark,
we can't see any stars

Because it's too hazy.

Ah, now I get it.

Crystal clear.

She's very talented
with words.

This just in--
the butcher
has been spotted

At the brand-new
museum of enormous metal

That goes under food,

Home of
the world-famous,

Stupendous silver
serving platter.

That would
look great under
the golden brisket.

Ah.

Now back to the hits.

[Lively music plays]

Well, you guys
have been pretty much
no help at all.

I said
something wrong.

So unless you have a tip
that would actually
help me,

Hmm...well,
when you get there,

Watch out for a bucket
of liver and onions

Over the front door.

Ha ha ha ha.
Classic.

Yeah,
classic.

Word up.

[Grunts]
hmm.

[Groans]

Aha!

Word girl.

Boy, am I happy to see you.

Hang on. You're happy
to see me? Why?

Are you faking?

No, no, I'm not.

I want to turn myself in.

This is no fun anymore.

Wait a minute.

How do I know this isn't
another trick

From your tricky book
of, you know, tricks?

Because I'm all out of
tricky tricks.

The book
wasn't finished.

Oh, good.
She's still here.
Myron, she's still here.

Who's still where now?
Oh, right, the girl
with the word.

Oh, great.
You guys.

Listen, it's nice
to see you and all,
but I'm really late.

So here's
your book back.

Plus, I have to say,
how to b*at superheroes?

Not my favorite subject.

Yeah, and the
ending stinks.

Everyone's a critic.

Word girl,
that's why we came by.

You are
absolutely right.

Our story
was a little hazy.

We finally figured it out.
We were both bad guys.

Yeah, both of us.
But I was worse.

Oh, way worse.
Wait. What?

Yes. The blue blazer
and razzmatazz--

We were a team
of evil supervillains.

We both robbed
the armored car...

But then
we were caught

By the
peppermint kid,

A superhero
just like you.

At least
I think we were.

It was an awfully
long time ago.

Aw, you've got to be
kidding me.

Narrator: and so,
with another criminal
brought to justice,

And a very old story

Finally made
a little less hazy,

Becky and scoops can finally
turn their attention

To the clear night sky
and fill up their star chart

With a little help
from above.

Remember, if you want
something fun and exciting

To reminisce about
all week long,

Be sure to tune in to
the next stupendous

And star-studded episode
of "word girl"

And bring soup.

♪ Word girl ♪

Hello.
I'm beau handsome,

And this is
the bonus round of...

"May I have a word?"

Our returning champion
will have a chance

To play for
even greater prizes
on the bonus round.

Emily, you correctly defined
the word "inflate."

Ready to play
the bonus round?

Yes, sir.
Great.

Take a look at
these pictures

And tell me which one
shows the definition

For "inflate."

[Game show music playing]

Emily.
Number .

In that picture,
becky is standing with

A balloon
she has inflated that
looks just like her.

That's correct.

Huggy, show emily
what she's won.

[Applause]
a pump

For your official
beau handsome

Giant inflatable head.

Hello, gorgeous.

Anyway, that's our show.
See you next time on...

"May I have a word?"

Want more "word girl"?

Watch your favorite episodes
and test your word power



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word power?

Fly over to your local library.
Cape not required.

Word up.