20x01 - Up in Daisy's Penthouse (1953)

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

[SNORING]

[WHISTLING]

[SQUEALING]

[SNORING]

[WHISTLING]

[SQUEALING]

[GRUNT]

[SNORING, BLOWING]

Boys.

Boys. Breakfast.

♪ Good morning, Ma ♪
♪ Good morning, Ma ♪

♪ Good morning, Ma ♪
Hi, Mom.

Now that I'm old,
your father has divorced me.

[WOMAN CRIES]

Oh, he won't get away with it.

Don't worry, Mother.
We'll bring him back alive.

Or in pieces.

Come on, fellas,
we got to break up this wedding.

Yeah.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

Hey, fellas,
it's Pop and the dame.

Oh. I've ordered everything
for the wedding.

And I've got the marriage
license too, Daisy-waisy.

Here, you'd better hold it.
I might forget it.

Oh, good.

Mm.

Oh, Popsie-wopsie,

you promised me you'd have those
nasty old sideburns shaved off.

They tickle your baby.

Okay, Daisy-waisy.

I'll go right to the barbershop.

And I'll also have my hair dyed,
so I'll look young and handsome.

Oh, wonderful.

I'm sorry
I can't stay for lunch.

But now, don't you be late
for the wedding.

We'll be back
at : sharp.

[SQUEALING]

Oh, my little honey bunny.

♪ My little honey bunny ♪

Hey, fellas,
We gotta stop that wedding.

Listen, if the old man
makes a fuss I'll...

Hey, how are we going
to get in there?

Oh, I took care of that.

Oh, a screwdriver.

No, it's a sledgehammer.
And I got a coal chisel.

Oh, boy.
Just stay there now.

Hold it steady.
Let me get a bead on it.

Oh!
Ow.

Oh, oh, oh.

Pardon me, hold that.

Oh, thank you.
Oh, oh!

Give me that hammer.
I'll m*rder you.

No. No, Moe.
No. No.

[YELLS]

What's the meaning of this?

Get up out of there.
Come on.

What are you doing here?

Ma sent us up here to keep you
from marrying that blond.

Yeah.

And I aim to do what I aim too,
I aim.

You termites.

Hey, Pa can still slap.

You bet.
Now, you boys be nice

and I'll let you come
to my wedding this afternoon.

Oh, here's some money.

Go out and get yourselves
some nice clothes.

Nothing doing. We're not
gonna let you marry her.

You can't bribe me.

Me too.

Me three.

Hey, you can't take that
from him.

Give it back.

You would.

Hmm.

Hey.

Now, get out of here unless you
want to dress like human beings

and come to my wedding.

Okay, Pop, you win.

Well, that's better.

Now, you can go in there and
help yourselves to my clothes.

Oh, thanks, Pop.
Say, you're great, Daddy.

I'm going down to the barbershop

and have these whiskers
taken off

and I want to have my hair dyed.

Ha, ha.
It won't help you, Pop.

Don't you get fresh now, son,
because you re...

Oh.

I'll see you when I get back.

Two hundred and ten, .
How did that get in there?

That dollar bill
don't belong there.

Wait a minute.
Come here.

[BOTH]
Give us that money.

Get goin'.

We got to find a way
to break up this wedding.

Oh, boy.

I got a golf suit.

Oh, boy.

Hey.

Something smells awful.

What are you looking at me for?

Oh.

Oh, boy, you hit the jackpot.

Yeah. Those moths lay
a lot of eggs, don't they?

This coat must be...

Nitwit you.

I'm sorry, Moe.
I'll turn around.

Don't tell me Pop wears
clothes like these.

Ow.

Why you...

Oh.

Wait a minute.
I didn't mean it, I'm sure.

Come on.
Oh!

Go on, get out of here.

Well, I guess the other pants
are better.

Oh, Pop must have sat in some
vanilla ice cream.

I'll take care of that.

There.

Well, I... Oh.

Cleaning fluid.

How convenient.

I'll fix that.

That's it.

Now...

Oh, yeah?

How do I look, kid?

Pretty good.
Uh, uh, say...

I think you have
a thread hangin'.

Wait a minute, Moe.
Well, get it off.

I got it.
There.

I want to look pretty good,
you know.

Boy, what a piece of material.

It must be imported.
I smell the ocean.

Well, there it is.

Oh, yeah?

I'll have it in a minute, Moe.

[GRUNTS]

Well, this...

A monocle.

Well, I'll wear these anyway.

Like them best.

How are you coming?
There.

Fine.

What happened?
Wait a minute, Moe.

It must be a mistake.

I'm sorry.

Why you...

Nitwit you.

♪ Oh, my little Janie ♪

Oh, pants.
Hey, wait a minute.

Come on.
Look out there.

Give me these.
Wait a minute.

Mine. I saw 'em first.

But they're my size.
Give me those.

MOE:
Come on now.
Don't you worry about that.

Let go of those pants.
No, they're not.

Let me have the pants.
Yeah.

Yeah.
Let go of them.

MOE:
Let me loose. Give me those.

LARRY:
No, you don't.

King Solomon
would give 'em each half.

So I'm King Solomon.

[CUCKOO'S CHIRPING]

Give me three.

Hi, Daisy.
Well, I got the marriage license

and the wedding's
all set for : .

Nice work, cutie.

Me and Chopper decided to have

the wedding up here
in the penthouse.

Yeah, it wouldn't be very polite

to give a guy the works
in his own joint.

Especially on his wedding day.

It's all right by me.

Attagirl.
And after it's all over,

you and I are going to Europe

and spend the old guy's dough,
huh, baby?

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Come on, give a guy a chance.
Don't hog the mirror.

Oh. There.

Oh, oh.

How do you like that?

Popsie, yoo-hoo.

DAISY:
Popsie,

Yoo-hoo.

Where are you?
Well, I...

Why, Popsie, you look
years younger

with your sideburns shaved off
and your hair dyed black.

And you smell so sweet.

[SQUEALING]

That's the girl
Dad's going to marry.

She thinks he's Pa.

Perfect.
Come on.

I just came to get you.
We decided to have the wedding

at my brother's penthouse.

Well, we're ready. I'm his best
man and this is his worst.

Have you got the license?

Oh, let's see.

But Moe, I'm not going... Quiet.

Ah.

Popsie.
Here it is.

♪ The wedding bells
Will start to ring ♪

♪ Ding dong ding ♪

Make yourself at home,
Popsie, and boys.

Hey, she's very hospital,
ain't she?

Yeah, but we better
be very careful.

What's the matter with you?

I'm nervous.
I'm in a hurry all over.

Well, a drink'll fix you up.
Come on, porcupine,

we'll mix him an Eenar Frappini.

Go ahead.
Give me a hand.

Hey, won't Ma be tickled
when she finds out the dame

married Shemp instead of Pa.

Yeah, but won't Pa sizzle.

She was supposed to be his wife,

and now she's gonna be
his daughter.

Bretta.

Foamifizzle.

Poopdominte.

And fipple juice.

Wait a minute.

I think you made it
a little too strong.

Okay.

There we are.
Shake it up.

Shake it up.

Thank you.

[SQUEALING QUIETLY]

[RUMBLES]

Sounds like it's done.

Indrubitably.

Boy, we sure mixed it,
didn't we?

Yes, we sure did.
Yeah.

What's the matter with you?

I'll knock your brains out.

Hello.

Put back those silver muggletts.

Moe, I ain't got no muggletts.
Put 'em back.

Put 'em back!

Ow, ow, ow.

Did you hurt yourself?

Moe.
Moe, don't do it.

[HORN HONKING ON DISTANCE]

Why, you, I'll...

BUTCH:
Now, look. We've got to knock
the old man off but quick.

CHOPPER:
Sure. As soon as the mug marries
Daisy, I'll polish him off.

BUTCH:
We can't sh**t him.
That'll make too much noise.

Sure, it'll make noise.

I got it.
Soon as they get married,

I'll take the groom,
dump him out of the window,

he drops stories, then
it looks like an accident.

BUTCH:
Yeah, that's a good idea.

Whew. I'm glad they made up
their mind,

because if... Wait a minute.

Do you think they mean me?

Well, they don't mean
your uncle.

Whoa.

Well, Popsie,
are you ready for the big leap?

Big leap? Yes, I...

I won't get m-married today.

I won't, I tell you, I won't.

I-I-I.
What are we waiting for?

Come on.
Moe. Moe. Moe.

We are gathered here today
to unite this couple...

I wonder what's keeping
my Daisy-waisy?

Boy, will she be surprised
to see how young I look.

[RINGS]
Hello.

Is Daisy there?

Yeah, but she can't come
to the phone now,

she's busy getting married
to Howard.

Thanks, I'll call later.

Married? She can't do that.

I ain't there.
But I'll be there.

I'm coming right over,
that's what I'll do. By golly.

How do you like that?

Look at this.
Snap dragons, eh?

I'll fix her.
I'll tell her a thing or two.

Why that...

By the power vested in me,

I now pronounce you man and wife
'till death do you part.

[SQUEALS]

[SHEMP SQUEALING]

You know, we can't throw
the old man out the window

while the Justice of the Peace
is still here.

What am I going to do?

I got it.

Let's dump him
down the elevator shaft.

Good boy.
Now I'll tell you what you do.

Yeah?
You go in and tell him...

You can't marry without me,
Daisy-waisy.

Uh, where... Oh, here it is here.

Farino frappe.
Made it up out of my own head.

This drink'll put
sparks in your hair.

Oh, boy.

I had six of these one day,
mm-hm.

Somebody's coming.
Oh, yeah.

You know, it's a nice day.

Especially for the wedding
upstairs here.

Oh, hiya, boys.

Hey, where've you been?

I'm looking for my Daisy-waisy.

Oh, I see.

Well, uh, your Daisy-waisy
is waiting for you downstairs.

Oh, I'd better go
down there quickly.

Mm-hm, you said it.

Yeah... No. No. No.

[YELLING]

[CRASH]

Where do you think you're going?

Upstairs.

[BARKS]

Well, that's that.

Good thought
you had there, Butch.

Thanks.

Let's head him off
in the elevator.

Hey, are we drunk?

I don't understand it.

Me too. If it wasn't
for the noise, I'd plug him.

[MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY]]

What the...

Oh.
Come here, you...

Oh!

Oh, my... My...

[BARKS]

[BARKS LOUDLY]

[♪♪♪]

Ow.

Do me bodily harm, eh?

I'll call a policeman,
see if I don't.

Get him. Come on.

What's the matter with you?

He locked it.

They're after me.
Let's get out of here.

Come on.

[HORN HONKING IN DISTANCE]

Oh.

[ALL SCREAM]

Ah.

You trying to k*ll me?

Oh! Oh. Oh.
Oh, the pole.

Hurry up.
Up the pole.

Get him up there.

Break it down.

Get up there, faster.

I'm doing my best.

What do you think,
I'm a squirrel?

No, your ears are too short.

LARRY:
Come on, get up, will you?

Get up higher.
Higher, Shemp.

I can't.
I've run out of pole.

They're all set up for us.

Well, let's give it
to all of them.

LARRY: Hurry it up.
MOE: Get up there, faster.

[ALL YELL]

LARRY:
Whoa.

Moe, Moe.

Hey, look.

Ah!

That's it, Butch.

Hey, spread out, you guys.
You're crowding me.

So long, chumps.

[STOOGES SCREAMING]

Sufferin' cats, it's Pa.

Good.
Let's get him home to Ma.

Am I mortified.

Come on home, Pa.
We know you.

[♪♪♪]