14x20 - Off The Rails

[bunniefuu]

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why do you miss when my baby kisses me?

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why does a love kiss stay in my memory? ♪

FIRE CRACKLES GENTLY

HE SNORES LIGHTLY

LOCK RATTLES

CHAIN RATTLES

CLOCK TICKS

STEAM ENGINE HISSES

ENGINE CHUGS

RUMBLING

CREAKING

BUFFERS CLANG

ENGINE HISSES

ENGINE CHUGS

HE GRUNTS

From the beginning, if you wouldn't mind, Mr...?

Fergusson. Look, I explained it all to that lad on the phone.

PC Younger? Yeah, he's, uh... still learning.

- I understand you're the signalman. - That's right, yeah.

I knew something was wrong as soon as I got here.

I saw the shed doors were open.

So I come across and there he was.

Mr Ellis. Lying there on the ground.

- And you called the ambulance? - No, Dr Trent did that.

Well, I called her cos I knew she were Ray's GP.

- ROB: How is he? - Still unconscious.

I'm going with him to hospital.

Let me know if there's any change.

Of course.

So, what was in there, then?

Freight wagons. They're held here overnight sometimes.

Any idea what was inside them?

Crates of wine?

On their way north.

- And they took the wagons as well? - Lock, stock and barrel.

Hitched them up and just towed them away.

Bare-faced cheek!

Seems like they knew exactly what they were doing, too.

Have transport police been informed?

Yes, sarge. According to Fergusson, Ellis was keeping watch.

He must have surprised them.

What else did he have to say?

That they'd been broken into a couple of weeks before.

One of the windows of the station master's office was smashed.

Why was it not reported?

Nothing taken. Just put it down to kids.

Well, you'd better follow it up, just the same.

Whoever stole the wagons had access to a locomotive.

Where would you keep something that big?

I mean, you could hardly put it in your garden shed, could you?

This is no joking matter.

Now, you and Younger check out where it was beforehand.

See if it passed through any stations on the way.

We're looking for someone with a good knowledge of the railways.

PHONE RINGS

- Ashfordly Police Station. - Somebody must have seen something,

or know where it is. Start with the properties

near the local train lines. - YOUNGER: Thank you.

Bye.

That was the hospital. Ray Ellis has come round.

Right, Walker, you get up there. See if he can remember anything.

Sarge.

DAVID: Come on. Don't you worry.

What you got there?

Found him on the road.

- Think he's hurt his foot. - Aw! What you gonna call it?

I don't know. I never really thought.

Well, if you're going to keep it, it needs a name.

- How about Flopsy? - Yeah.

Yeah. Sweet. How'd you get on at the station?

Oh, they've cancelled all the trains until they've checked the line.

I've said I'll go back down there later on

and see if anybody else needs a lift.

The Dunkirk spirit.

Well, when's the competition, then?

The weekend. I ought to be getting my eye in.

I used to do the shot put a bit.

- That's the same sort of thing. - Not really. No.

I find this very relaxing as a hobby.

In contrast to the cut and thrust of undertaking.

Ah, right.

It requires a certain... What's the word?

Ball?

- No. - Blazer?

No. Temperament.

Oh.

Oh.

Anyway, they're called woods.

I've got an old set somewhere if you're interested.

Dad! Oh, Dad!

Val.

- I came as soon as I could. - This is my daughter.

Your father's had a nasty experience.

So I hear. What happened?

That's what we're trying to find out.

They're keeping him under observation.

- Any chance you might be around? - Of course.

And you're coming to stay with us once they let you out.

We'll look after you.

You were saying.

RAY: Well, I just... I just went out and...

And there it was, this loco pulling out of the shed.

How many of them were there?

Well, one driving the train, of course.

And there must have been another one at least who gave me this.

Did you manage to get a good look at him?

No, but I think he had a balaclava on.

What sort of build was he?

It was dark, as I say. I'm sorry.

OK, um...

Who else knew about these wagons?

The railway staff.

Myself and Fergusson. Oh, and the import company.

Do you have an address for them?

Oh, it's, uh... it'll be in the office somewhere.

Kendrick & Son.

Bernie tells me he's been teaching you how to play bowls, David.

- He's showing some real promise. - You want to watch it up there.

It's dog eat dog up at that bowling club.

They take it dead serious, you know.

Quite right too.

Hey, is that who I think it is?

Aye, Gordon Bickerstaff.

Ooh, an old rival, eh, Bernie?

He has an uncanny habit of winning...

by nefarious means.

- Eh? - He cheats.

I heard that.

Oh, hello, Gordon. I were just saying, beer in here's not cheap.

You going in for this weekend's competition, Mr Bickerstaff?

I certainly will. And I expect to win.

No change there, then. I'll put money on it.

What was that?

Oh, it's the annual bowling tournament.

We normally do the teas but we're doubled booked this year.

Who's doing the catering, then?

No-one at the moment. I shall have to ask around.

Look no further.

- Eh? - We'll do it, won't we, David?

What?!

Oh, it's very good of you...

- No, it'll be a pleasure. - But...

the thing is, it's not really a hot dog style affair.

Honestly, you needn't trouble yourself.

It's no trouble at all.

Wi' years experience in outside catering, I should be able

to rustle something up.

Aw, there you go, then, Bernie. Problem solved.

Ah, just in time for a brew.

Not for me, thanks.

I've just come from the hospital.

- How is he? - Stable.

- Did he say anything? - No, not really.

But we're pretty sure the break-in a few weeks ago is connected.

How?

We think they were after paperwork detailing the shipment.

Pretty good view of the station from up here.

Yep.

Presumably, you'd see anybody hanging around?

We get dozens of passengers through here every day. All sorts.

I don't pay much attention.

All this looks very complicated.

You've got to know what you're doing.

As would the thieves...

I imagine.

Whoever it was must have had a good working knowledge of the signal box

to get those wagons up and away.

I suppose so.

Where were you last night, Mr Fergusson?

Locked up at the end of my shift and went straight home.

MUSIC: 'Papa's Got A Brand New Bag' by Georgie Fame

♪ Take a look at this thing

♪ Looks like my papa

♪ Doin' a new green thing

♪ But it ain't no drag

♪ All he's got is a brand new bag ♪

Over £ , worth of wine.

What I want to know is what you lot are doing about it.

We're following up all relevant leads.

I mean, one or two bottles along the way, that's par for the course.

But three entire wagons full?

Presumably the consignment was insured?

That's not the point.

People rely on us. They expect service.

If we can't deliver, they go elsewhere.

- There's plenty of other suppliers. - We've got every man on the job.

Glad to hear it.

Is there any way details of the consignment

could have been leaked from this office?

I deal with the transport side personally.

You're wasting your time here. You should be out there

scouring the railway.

tonnes of rolling stock doesn't just vanish into thin air.

Sorry.

I'm sure Mr Scripps said something about a 'forward stride'.

PEGGY: Here we are.

I knew it'd come in handy some day.

Well, it just needs fettling.

HE SIGHS

This Bickerstaff fellow...

- What about him? - ...how good is he?

Well, he reckons he could have been a pro

if it weren't for his wife's lumbago.

Really?

METAL CLANGS

- There you go. Is yours a pint? - Please.

Hello, Val. Any news on your father?

- He's discharging himself. - Really? Is that wise?

I told him not to, but he won't listen.

He's determined to get back to work.

Is he still gonna be staying with you?

Just until he gets his strength back.

Well, at least he's being looked after properly.

I'll call by later. See how he's doing.

Fine.

Thanks.

SHE SIGHS Poor old Ray.

I know. Nasty business.

You know what, Gina?

- I could m*rder a gin and tonic. - Rough day?

You could say that.

The divorce papers are ready.

I started proceedings today.

Well, good for you.

I know it must be hard, but at least you'll be able to move on.

I know. It's just...

not that pleasant.

Look, I've been thinking.

It's ages since I've had a proper night out.

Why don't we get all dolled up and go out tomorrow night?

- Paint the town red. - Oh, I'm not sure.

Oh, come on. Live a little.

Let your hair down.

Why not? It's about time I tried the famous Ashfordly night life.

Hey, forget Ashfordly, I'm taking you to the bright lights of Whitby.

OK, then. I'm looking forward to it already.

Here, have you got over your broken heart?

Eh?

Oh, come on. The lovely nurse Owen leaving you high and dry.

No, thanks, mate. Far less trouble being single.

Only yourself to answer to.

- You know how it is. - Exactly.

That's why we should make the most of it.

We should have a night out.

With my good looks and your charm, we'd be irresistible.

- The girls'd be swooning. - Dead right.

Now, what do you think? Shall we go for it? Tomorrow night?

- It's a date. - Good.

KEY RATTLES IN LOCK

Well, we've checked with the main depot. All their locos

were accounted for on the night of the robbery. None stolen.

So where did they get it from, then?

Well, I don't know.

All the stations along the line

haven't reported seeing anything passing through.

And all the signalmen we spoke to didn't see anything

before or after.

Which means?

It must still be in the area. Has to be.

Well, so far we've searched all of this.

Yeah, and the transport police have searched north and east.

We've got to stop them slipping through the net.

Well, we've checked every inch of the line in a -mile radius.

Well, you'd better make it .

No, we're missing something, I know we are.

What about when they're too old for service?

- What? - Well, we know the train

wasn't stolen, so it stands to reason

they must have got it from somewhere else.

When an engine's been decommissioned, what happens?

Where do they all go?

Ray Ellis would know.

Find out.

And while you're at it, pay Fergusson another visit.

There's something he's not telling us.

- Can I help? - I certainly hope so.

We were disturbed last night. My wife and I.

Disturbed?

- An intruder. - Ah.

And, um... what exactly was taken?

- Rien de tout. - Eh?

Nothing.

- But you were broken into? - Well, not that you'd know.

Except for the smell.

The smell?

The smell. Lingering.

Fetid. Like a fox.

Or a badger, maybe.

I see.

BERNIE: Watch your feet. Now, one, two, three and follow through.

Aye, getting better.

I'm still not sure when to let go of the ball.

Instinct. You'll find it suddenly clicks.

Sounds painful.

Can you not talk her out of it, Rosemary?

What? Aunt Peggy? I don't think you'll be able to do that.

These are respectable people. Friends of mine.

I get the impression, once she gets the bit between her teeth...

They're not going to thank me if they go down with some ghastly bug.

Where are you off to now?

I've got to go and try and find a marquee.

And I said I'd go with him. Help out. If you don't mind.

Oh, go on. Why not?

HE SIGHS I wish I'd never opened my mouth.

I'd happily make do with a hot flask and a packet of Garibaldis!

Breaker's yard. They're brought in and broken up for scrap.

Where?

Over at Mossforth Bridge.

Ah. Thanks. Thanks, love.

- Who else knows about this? - Well...

Fergusson's certainly seen them go over the years.

Has he told you?

Leave it, love.

What?

- It's nothing. - You don't know.

Well, there've been things...

little things, disappearing from the yard recently.

Coal from the bunker. Sleepers from the side of the track.

And?

Well, it... it could be Fergusson.

Could be? It is.

Why do you say that?

We're sure he's selling the stuff.

To support his ex-wife and son. I mean, it's pin money really.

Still...

I see. And you think...?

I don't know what I think.

We've worked together for years, me and Tom.

There's a chance, I suppose.

You know, if he were desperate enough.

- DOOR OPENS - KNIFE SCRAPES

DOOR CLOSES

Get off! Any luck?

No, they're all hired out. Weddings or fetes.

What about the scouts?

No, it's their jamboree.

Well, there must be one somewhere.

Keep trying.

HE SIGHS

Aunt Peggy, have you seen my woods anywhere? I can't find them.

No. No.

Hey, are we still having this night out, then?

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Wait till they see my Mash Potato down the Whitby Palladium!

DOOR OPENS

What do you want?

Ah, Mr Fergusson.

- You've got a lot of coal here. - For the stove.

Must be expensive to run.

Aye, it can be.

Look, come on. Where did you get it from?

I bought it.

Oh, that's good. You'll have proof of purchase and receipts.

Withholding information from an enquiry is a serious offence.

OK. Look...

I admit. Sometimes I help myself to a few bits and pieces.

But I never took them wagons. I swear it.

Why should we believe you?

It's the truth.

You're the only one with access to that signal box.

- Someone could have got the key. - Where from?

Hook. Round the back.

You're not meant to, but we leave it there. Save us losing it.

- Who owns this breaker's yard? - A Mr Osbourne.

Well, what are you waiting for? Get round there.

And what about Fergusson?

I don't think he's got the nous to carry off anything like this.

I think they had the signal box staked out.

They saw where he hid the keys and then helped themselves.

Someone who just happened to have the expertise?

I'm not convinced.

How are you getting on with Kendrick?

Oh, uh, well, we're running a check on him with CRO.

Do you really think that he'd steal his own goods?

And claim the insurance money?

It wouldn't be the first time, I assure you.

MACHINERY CLANKS LOUDLY

Can I help you?

Jack Osbourne?

That's me.

Have you found one?

I reckon this is the last one left in the country.

Well, let's have a look, then.

Oh, aye. That should do t'job.

Now then, we'll need a blackboard.

For t'menu.

Each engine that comes in here is stripped down and broken up. Simple.

Every one?

That's what I said.

How many do you get through in a year?

Two, three. No more.

And you'd notice if one went missing from the yard?

HE CHUCKLES

What do you think?

Sarge?

- What is it? - Just heard back from the CRO.

Kendrick did time at Durham... for insurance fraud.

HAMMERING

- What on earth...?! - Ah. Bernie.

- Are the Russians coming? - It's the only one we could find.

We weren't quite sure where to put it.

Preferably, back on the truck.

- Territorial Army lent us this. - Really?

Have you got a list of competitors?

- Competitors? - To get an idea of the numbers.

Well, it's not the feeding of the , .

It's more of a low-key affair.

I thought we said tea.

In my experience, the punters always prefer something a bit stronger.

Here. Try one of these.

They're a bit of an experiment.

Hmm! What is it?

Um...

rabbit.

Little Flopsy?

Oh, David.

Well, I didn't know he'd named it.

You withheld information.

It's not something you'd broadcast.

Look, I made a mistake and I've paid for it.

I've served my time. It was years ago.

All this I've built up since.

% legitimate.

Go over the books with a toothcomb. You won't find anything.

You must admit, it's a bit of a coincidence.

I'm innocent. You're wasting your time.

You should be out looking for that train.

Don't worry. We are.

What if they strike again?

I've got a tobacco shipment coming through from Hull.

- When? - Tomorrow.

Who's to say they won't hijack this consignment as well?

PHONE RINGS

YOUNGER: Ashfordly Police Station.

When?

We'll be with you as soon as we can. Bye.

- Who was that? - Mr Ellis, at the railway station.

His office has been broken into.

Again? Call Walker. Tell him I'll meet him there.

No, I wouldn't have noticed anything but for that paper on the floor.

It must have blown off the desk when they closed the door.

- What have we got? - No sign of forced entry.

- Anything missing? - Freight timetables.

Kendrick's got another shipment coming through here tomorrow.

Yeah, which was in the file. It's due in about : .

Looks like they're planning to strike again.

This time we'll be waiting for them.

The freight train will be coming along this line here.

We will be positioned at this junction, with the empty wagon.

And then we stop the train.

How?

MUSIC: 'Catch a Train' by Free

TRAIN WHISTLE

♪ Catch a train to my place

TRAIN WHISTLE

♪ Call me when you get into town

♪ I'm gonna meet you at the station oh yeah

♪ You can tell me why you're feeling down

MILLER: Once the train is at a complete standstill,

we unhitch the freight wagon containing the tobacco

and we recouple the empty wagon,

which will have been positioned in this siding, here.

STEAM HISSES

♪ Baby your father

♪ I know he's always drinking

♪ Most of the time

♪ He don't even know what he's doing

♪ Now baby

♪ Catch a train to my place

♪ Call me when you get into town

♪ Yeah

♪ Gonna meet you at the station oh, oh

♪ You can tell me why you're feeling down

You then climb on board the empty wagon,

and the train proceeds to Aidensfield, to be held overnight.

Mr Ellis and myself will be positioned in the shunting yard,

along with local reinforcements.

When the thieves strike,

we move. With a bit of luck, they won't know what's hit 'em.

♪ Catch a train to my place

♪ Call me when you get into town

♪ I'm gonna meet you at the station

♪ Oh yeah

♪ You can tell me why you're feeling down... ♪

TRAIN DOORS SLAM

TRAIN HOOTS

ENGINE CHUFFS

Do you mind if we open the door a bit? Let some light in?

They might see us.

- Hey! What if they're armed? - Don't worry.

We've got the element of surprise on our side.

Train's moving into position now.

All units standing by.

Might as well make ourselves comfortable.

I've a feeling we're in for a long wait.

- Ah. Would, uh, would you like one? - No, thanks.

Val made 'em.

Corned beef.

♪ MUSIC: 'Waltz for Lumumba' by The Spencer Davis Group

Cobweb.

No.

- Coat. - No.

Do you give up?

Oh, go on, then.

- Cow. - What?

There isn't a cow in here!

We passed some in one of the fields.

That was hours ago!

My turn again. I spy...

BUMP

Shhh! What was that?

BOLT SLIDES

It's gone!

Sarge?

The wagon! Stolen from under our noses!

QUIET CHATTER

- May the best man win. - Absolutely.

Heads. Ha-ha-ha!

First, three wagons go missing, and then we lose another.

This investigation is rapidly becoming a farce! Where are they?

It's the Aidensfield Triangle.

I'm glad you find it funny, Bellamy!

Sorry, Sarge.

I've just had Kendrick on the phone

wondering what the blazes is going on.

And the thing that galls me most is, I can't tell him.

We were supposed to be protecting that shipment!

- How on earth did they find out? - Ellis?

What? You think he hit himself over the back of the head?

- No, but he could have... - Corned beef.

Sarge?

Sandwiches.

Yes. One at a time, please, gents.

£ on Bickerstaff at - . Thank you.

WARNING WHISTLE

David!

Do you want a burger?

Oh... no, thanks.

Have you got anything vegetarian?

I didn't know you were vegetarian.

I've converted.

PEGGY: I think I've got a carrot somewhere.

Yeah, here it is. Might as well finish that off.

HE SIGHS

Oh, come on, lad.

You don't really think I'd turn Flopsy into a burger, do you?

He's at home, David, safe in his hutch, up to his ears in carrots.

TRAIN HOOTS

ENGINE CHUFFS

Where is she?

- Who? - Your daughter.

Well, she's not here.

- Where was she last night? - I've no idea!

You told her, didn't you? About the plan.

She even made your ruddy sarnies!

She was the only other person that knew.

She wouldn't. I mean, there's no way Val could have been involved.

Where is she now, then?

Uh...

UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC

APPLAUSE

- How's he doing? - He can win if he keeps his nerve.

Ooh!

BICKERSTAFF CLEARS HIS THROAT

Hey! You did that on purpose!

You must know these tracks like the back of your hand.

- Where could they hide the wagons? - How would I know?

Well, look at it! Properly!

Hang on.

- This is a recent map. - So?

Well, s-s-some of the abandoned sidings aren't even shown.

Bellamy?

Well, it's the one that the railway police use.

Well, they gave us this copy.

Look, th-there's one here. just beyond Oldthwaite Bridge.

It used to lead up to the old mine, but it's been disused for years.

That's about ten minutes from the station.

- Any others? - Well, not close by.

Right. You two, come with me.

Younger, get on to Transport Police.

That's where they must be.

BERNIE: Ow!

- I'm so sorry! Are you all right? - What do you think?

I totally understand if you prefer to call it a day.

Not likely!

- What?! - You'll have to, David.

- Well, I can't! - It's the final end.

If all else fails, k*ll the jack. Whatever happens,

we can't let Bickerstaff win. - Oh.

SIRENS WAIL

It... it's there. Just round that bend.

Right, you lot. Come with me.

UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC

He's not going to stop!

Get out of the way!

TRAIN WHISTLES

Are you all right?

Walker. Where is he?

Can't see him, Sarge.

BELLAMY: There he is, Sarge!

Right. Let's get after him.

SIRENS WAIL

SIRENS

SIRENS

Where can we stop it? Think!

There's a siding just this side of Aidensfield

where we can divert it off the main line.

We'll have to get in touch with Fergusson.

SIRENS

- Oh no! The : ! - What?

- What are you on about? - The passenger train!

Heading straight for 'em!

Well, can it be diverted?

It'll have left the station already.

What can we do?

Just pray they reach that siding in time.

SIRENS

The game's not lost...

till it's won.

PHONE RINGS

TRAIN HOOTS

Put the brake on! You'll hit the buffer!

Do it!

BRAKE SHRIEKS

APPLAUSE

APPLAUSE

The game's over.

Take 'em away.

BERNIE: Don't think I didn't see what you did.

Bernie. I-I can explain.

Jumped-up little so-and-so.

He'd been cheating for years. About time he got his comeuppance.

Any road up, best man won.

♪ MUSIC: 'Do Wah Diddy Diddy' by Manfred Mann

♪ Do wah diddy, diddy, dum diddy do

♪ Snappin' her fingers and shufflin' her feet

♪ Singin' do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do

♪ She looked good looked good

♪ She looked fine looked fine

♪ She looked fine looked fine

- Cheers. - Cheers.

Mm. Well, we certainly deserve that.

Hey, I can't believe Val got herself into so much debt.

Oh, just foolish, I guess. Falling in with the wrong crowd in London.

I suppose, with her husband having worked with the railways,

it seemed an obvious way out.

But to cosh her own father?

Well, they hadn't bargained on Ellis staying late.

And it wasn't Val who actually att*cked him.

Mm... she got Colin to do the dirty work.

Yeah, and he charmed Osbourne at the breaker's yard

into getting them an engine. Enough work!

Please.

- Oh no. - What?

At the bar! Look who's there!

Oh, good! Let's see if we can get a drink out of them.

No! They're probably just talking about work or something boring.

Let's pretend we haven't seen them.

Hey, look who I've just spotted.

- Who? - It's Gina. Over there.

Oh... right. Well, look,

we can go somewhere else if you want.

And who is that she's with?

Come on.

♪ I knew we was falling in love... ♪

Gina! Hi. Who's your friend?

Helen!

It's Helen.

Bit of a coincidence, eh?

Yeah. We're on a girls' night out.

Yeah, we're on, uh...

a lads' night out.

Well, never mind! At least we've got someone to dance with.

Come on, Rob.

♪ Well, I'm hers I'm hers

♪ She's mine she's mine

♪ I'm hers she's mine

♪ Wedding bells are gonna chime

Do you... want to dance?

Or do you want a drink?

A drink, eh?

♪ Do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do

♪ Do wah diddy diddy, dum diddy do ♪

♪ MUSIC: 'Love of the Loved' by Cilla Black

♪ Each time I look into your eyes

♪ I see that there there heaven lies

♪ And as I look

♪ I see the love of the loved

♪ Someday they'll see that from the start

♪ My place has been deep in your heart

♪ And in your heart

♪ I see the love of the loved

♪ Though I said it all before

♪ I will say it more and more

♪ Now that I'm really sure You love me

♪ And I know that from today

♪ I'll see it in the way

♪ That you look at me and say you love me

♪ So let it rain What do I care?

♪ Deep in your heart

♪ I'll still be there

♪ And when I'm there

♪ I see the love of the loved

♪ So let it rain What do I care?

♪ Deep in your heart I'll still be there... ♪

So, Dr Trent.

How about that coffee I promised you?

We could always skip the coffee.

♪ I see the love

♪ Of the loved ♪