04x03 - Episode 3

[bunniefuu]

["SHE USED TO WANNA BE
A BALLERINA" PLAYING]

- [GIRL ] Hey!
- [GIRL SQUEALS]

[GIRL ] I haven't seen you in ages!

[GIRL ] Oh my God!

Do I have to go?

Camp's only for a couple of nights.

And you're with all your
schoolmates. It'll be fun.

You sure you don't want
to bring the special pants?

Sh. No. It hasn't
happened for ages, okay.

I'm going now.

- [DAD] Have fun, Rubes!
- Love you.

- What is she wearing?
- "Love you!"

- She stinks.
- Been to the charity shop again, Ruby?

- [LAUGHTER]
- Ew!

Ruby, this is Sarah. She's new. I
want you to look after her, please.

Hi.

- Hi.
- Come on.

[GIRLS LAUGHING]

- Which bunk do you want?
- This one looks good.

Ew. Can anyone smell something bad?

- It's just Ruby Matthews.
- Yeah.

Poor people always stink.

[LAUGHING]

Who was that?

That's Darla. She doesn't
let anyone into her group.

She seems unpleasant.

Hey. Do you wanna have
a burpin' competition?

♪ To see where she's at... ♪

- [BURPS]
- [BOTH LAUGH]

- [BURPS LOUDLY]
- ♪ La dat dat dat ♪

- ♪ Oh ♪
- ♪ Oh ♪

♪ Look in your heart ♪

♪ Why don't you see where she's at? ♪

♪ She used to wanna be a ballerina ♪

[SONG FADES]

[GASPS]

[WHIMPERS]

Oh no.

Oh God.

- Did you wet the bed?
- [GASPS]

No. I spilled some water.

I've got some spare pajamas.

Please don't tell anyone.

I won't.

♪ All you gotta do is tick
the box beside my name ♪

["WAY I WALK" BY THE CRAMPS PLAYING]

♪ The way I walk is
just the way I walk ♪

♪ The way I talk is
just the way I talk... ♪

Maybe.

♪ The way I smile is
just the way I smile ♪

- ♪ Touch me, baby, and I'll go hog wild! ♪
- ♪ Whoo! ♪

- Did you clean, Mum?
- [JOY FUSSING]

- No, I think Joanna did.
- Oh.

Um...

Have you seen my bright
green dress, darling?

No. Um... I've gotta go.

- I'm not gonna be back till late tonight.
- All right. Well, have fun.

- Thanks.
- [SIGHS] Ah!

[SIGHS]

- See ya.
- Where are you off to looking all fancy?

[LAUGHS]

I'm going to a q*eer
night later with a friend.

- I'm his wingman.
- Hmm!

- What do you think?
- [LAUGHS]

Come here.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Oh...

- I don't...
- A bit of eyeliner.

- Okay. Uh... [GROANS]
- Lovely. And now the other side.

- Ah! Oh! Yeah, that's in my eye.
- There we are.

- Now you're perfect.
- Really?

Great. Thank you.

- You're welcome.
- See you later.

[JOANNA CHUCKLES]

Oh,

- Can I have my dress, please?
- What dress?

- The one you're wearing.
- It was on the drying rack. [SIGHS]

There was a scarf on the drying
rack too. White with flowers.

Are you gonna thank me
for, uh... the cleaning?

Thank you for cleaning.
And for stealing my clothes.

Oh, I've got this baby group
thing. Do you want to come with me?

Um... No. I'm good. I think
I'm just gonna hang out here.

What's that creepy tree house all about?

My ex built it. Never really liked it.

The ex that's not Joy's father?

You can do your own
washing later if you want.

[PHONE RINGS]

- Hey.
- [ERIC] Are you on your way?

- I need help.
- With what?

Decidin' what to wear.

I've got too many options.

I've confused myself,
and I'm in fashion hell.

But, dude, it's... it's only
two o'clock. What's the big rush?

Otis, this is my first
proper gay night out.

It is a big deal, and I must prepare!

I know it's a big deal.

I just have to go to Ruby's first.

Does Maeve know you're hangin' out?

We're not hangin' out. She's
helping with my campaign.

And, no, Maeve doesn't know.

- I told you we had a fight.
- Is she still not talkin' to you?

Uh... We...

I don't know if she's not talking
to me, but I'm not talking to her.

- We're not even officially together, so...
- What time are you gonna get here?

I don't know, like...

- Seven-ish.
- [YELLS] Seven?

Otis, I can't glam myself
alone for five hours.

- Well, I'll be there as soon as I can.
- [ERIC SPLUTTERS]

- You...
- [BEEPING]

No!

No...

- [GIRL SHRIEKS]
- [BOY] Go, go that way!

- [TYRONE] Molloy hasn't read your chapter?
- [MAEVE] No, I haven't heard anything.

[TYRONE] I'd ask him what he thinks.

No. I don't wanna seem desperate.

You've gotta stop being
so meek and British.

You're in America now. You
can ask for what you want.

Mm-hmm. Really?

Guys, I got the internship.

- [GASPS]
- Molloy just called me to his office.

I'm going with him to
this book launch next week,

where he's gonna introduce
me to his publisher.

- Can you believe it?
- Wow.

Congratulations.

Yeah. Congrats, that's amazing.

I gotta go call my mom. She's
gonna lose her sh*t! [SQUEALS]

[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]

Are you okay?

Yeah. How about you?

It's stupid. I convinced
myself I might actually get it.

I kinda knew she was gonna get it.

Her brother went to Wallace, and, um...

her dad donated a building or somethin'.

Her chapter was about how hard
it is to go to boarding school.

[SNICKERS] Yeah.

I mean, I... I love Ellen,
but she's never gonna get

why an opportunity like this
is such a big deal for us.

Don't worry about it.

You're an amazing writer, and
there will be other things.

[PHONE CHIMES]

Hello.

- Hiya. I brought cakes.
- Hi.

- What's on them?
- Oh, my squirrels. I miss them so much.

It's Sadie, Simon, Selina, and Bruce,
'cause he looks like my stepdad.

Right. Who are you?

Oh, I'm Aimee. Is Isaac in?

[ISAAC] I said it's for me.

- Aimee.
- [AIMEE] Hi.

This is my brother, Joe.

- Who is leaving.
- Am I?

Yes. I said I needed the
caravan today, remember?

- Without you playing video games in it.
- [JOE] Fine.

I'm goin' out.

Cool. Which one's Sadie?

Bye, Isaac.

Goodbye.

[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]

Rubes!

The person who I'm not allowed
to mention by name is here.

How have you been?

If you make my daughter cry
again, it will not be good for you.

- [FOOTSTEPS]
- [SIGHS]

- Why do you look like a French pirate?
- I'm going to a...

No, I don't have all day.
I'm meeting Anwar and Olivia.

You'll just have to lose the eyeliner

and borrow some of Dad's clothes, okay?

He's helping us with the video.

What video?

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS]

[PHONE RINGS]

Ah, yes!

- [ABBI] Hey, Savior.
- [ROMAN AND AISHA] Hi!

Hi!

What are you doing? We're at
Roman's. Do you wanna come over?

I'm gettin' ready to go
to a q*eer night later.

Emerald City?

- Yeah.
- We were thinkin' of goin'.

- Let's all go together.
- Oh my God!

- Please!
- [ROMAN] Come.

- Uh, yeah.
- [ALL] Please!

- [AISHA] Please!
- Yeah, let's do it.

Do you wanna get ready together?

Well, I'm... I'm waitin' for
Otis to, uh... finish a thing.

- Fine. Tell him he can swing by later.
- Yeah.

Come. It'd be fun.

- [ABBI] You know you want to.
- [ROMAN] We'll have a ball.

Yes.

- [ABBI] Yes!
- [LAUGHS]

Hmm...

[OTIS] Don't you think I should
wear something a bit more hip?

No. This outfit is great.
You could be anyone.

Which means people can project
what they want onto you.

- Mmm.
- [PHONE CHIMES]

[SIGHS]

Oh, whoa. I don't need that, do I?

He does need it.

- Your skin looks like an onion, Otis.
- Um...

- Uh...
- Thank you.

[OTIS WHIMPERS]

- Smile.
- [GROANS]

Ugh... [SHUDDERS]

- [RUBY] Okay!
- Here?

[RUBY] Yes.

[SIGHS]

- [ROLAND] Okay.
- [CLEARS THROAT]

And we're rolling.

[CAMERA WHIRRING]

Should I start?

- Yes.
- Sorry, I thought you'd say "action."

Oh my God. Dad, please say "action."

And... action.

♪ I am Otis Milburn,
and I'm here to say ♪

♪ I'm the best therapist
you'll hear today ♪

[RUBY] Cut!

What the hell are you doing?

I'm responding to O's video.

O is dynamic, interesting,
and mysterious.

She can rap.

You are none of those things.

So, you need a clean message,

which is why I've made you a script.

Just relax and be normal.

And... action.

Hello there.

I'm the original sex therapist,

formerly practicing
at Moordale Secondary.

I'm compassionate and honest.

I will meet you where you're at.
- This is bad.

- Before starting my clinic...
- Why does he look so startled?

- I don't know.
- ... the students were lost and uned...

This isn't working. This is ridiculous.

O is better at this than I am.

She's better at being cool.
She's probably a better therapist.

- Otis. Otis!
- I'm hot.

- Otis.
- [SIGHS]

Listen to me.

You know you are good
at talking to people.

You make them feel heard.

Now, forget the camera.
Forget the script.

Pretend I'm a client,

and you're telling me why
I should listen to you.

Okay?

[SIGHS]

[OTIS EXHALES]

[EXHALES]

Hi, I'm Otis Milburn, and I'm
running for student counselor.

And I am also a bit of a mess.

I am incredibly awkward, and I
struggle with public speaking.

I suffer from anxiety.

[GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING]

And I often don't like
the way my body looks.

I didn't kiss anyone until I was ,

and I've had problems
w*nk*ng and fingering.

I've had my heart
broken by people I like,

and I've hurt people who like me.

And I feel misunderstood
a lot of the time.

So...

I am a mess, but I
think all teenagers are,

and I think that's why it's
so important that we can talk.

[SIGHS]

Yeah?

♪ Welcome, everyone ♪

♪ How are you? How are you? ♪

- ♪ How are you? ♪
- [BABY BABBLING]

♪ Welcome, everyone ♪

♪ How are you? ♪

♪ How are you today? ♪

- [LAUGHTER]
- Welcome to Tickle Tots.

Let's start by going around the room,

saying you and your
baby's names, their age,

and an interesting fact about yourself.

[RAINSTICK RATTLES]

Hello.

My name's Jean, and this is Joy.

She's eight weeks old.

And, um...

Interesting fact, well... [CHUCKLES]

Aah...

I almost d*ed when giving birth.

It happened very suddenly,

and I thought for a very split second

that maybe I wouldn't get to
meet my baby or see my son again.

And, um... well, it was terrifying.

But, um... but we're fine now.

And, uh... Well, except
Joy cries quite a lot.

And I'm a little bit worried that
it might be because of my stress

because of the birth,

and, well, my sister's staying with us,

and I've gone back to work.

Um...

And also, my partner
left because he is...

he's not the father.

[MURMURING]

Sorry, um... it's not very interesting.

Worries, I guess.

Welcome, Jean.

- Mmm.
- [ALL] Hi, Jean.

[WOMAN] Hi, welcome.

- [RATTLES]
- [CHUCKLES]

Ahem. I'm Geri. This is Marlow.

She's ten weeks old,

and I like to dip the
entire digestive in the mug

and suck the tea through
it like a biscuity straw.

- [LAUGHTER]
- [WOMAN] I'm the same!

[RATTLES]

[MICHAEL] Checks first.

Okay.

Now gently lift your
left foot off the clutch.

Left foot. That's your right foot.

[ADAM] Yeah. Mm-hm.

[MICHAEL] Good. Now, stop.

- Stop!
- You didn't teach me how to stop!

[BOTH SCREAM]

- Oh, Jesus Christ, Adam!
- You didn't tell me how to stop.

This was a mistake.

I am capable of patience. I
am trying to be a better me.

Adam, you're right. I
didn't teach you how to stop.

It's my fault. I am sorry I yelled.

Why do you keep saying
sorry? It's freaking me out.

I'm doing an online course.
It's called Being a Better Man.

It's helping, I think.

Please.

Shall we try again?

[SIGHS]

[BRIGHT MUSIC PLAYING]

[BRAKES SQUEAL]

[KNOCKS]

Welcome to me humble abode!

- [LAUGHS]
- Hi! You look amazing!

- Oh, thank you. So do you.
- Thank you.

[ROMAN] Make yourself at home.

I forgot to say to
bring swimmin' shorts.

But you can borrow some of mine
if you feel like a dip in the pool.

- The pool?
- [LAUGHTER AND CHATTER]

[EXCITED SHOUTS]

Stop it! Oi, oi! Hands up, Savior!

Don't even dare! Don't even dare!

No one's safe. Look.

- I'll get you those shorts now.
- Um... Hold my flippin' glass.

- Are you kiddin'?
- No, he's not.

- [ERIC] Yes, she is!
- [ABBI] No, he is not!

Whoo! [LAUGHS]

[ISAAC] So, you could do sculpture.

Or there's printmaking as well, here.

But it's about finding what's
the right expression for you.

Yeah.

I don't think I get art.

What makes you decide how
to decorate your cakes?

- Dunno, just what I feel on the day.
- Well, that's basically art.

Is that someone's bed?

Yeah.

Yeah, that's Tracey Emin.

It's what her bed looked like after
she'd had a depressive episode.

And then she put it in a
gallery. How badass is that?

And this over here is Ana Mendieta.

She took loads of
photographs of herself.

A lot of female artists
like to use self-portraiture.

Maybe it's because other people
don't see them how they really are.

Yeah.

Do you have a camera?

Um... Do you have any
sort of regular income?

Um, I work... mainly in
the wellness industry.

I... I do Reiki, and,
um, I teach reflexology.

And I sold cold press juicers for a bit.

- Oh, okay.
- And these days, I am a nanny.

Oh, I love babies. Babies are the best.

- Oh.
- Uh...

Cool. Okay. So, uh... we will
need to run a... a credit check.

I...

I don't have a...
like, a credit... score.

Yeah, I... I've recently just
come back from overseas, so...

- Ah! Whereabouts?
- Oh, well, um... yeah, I...

I've spent a lot of time
in Thailand and Malaysia.

That's so cool.

Uh, it's kind of my dream to go
to New Zealand, if I'm honest.

I wanna see where they sh*t
Lord of the Rings. It's just...

I know it's dumb, but...

[AS GOLLUM] "We wants it."

"And we needs it."

[AS GOLLUM] "We must have the precious."

- [LAUGHING]
- It's such a... Ah, it's...

Um. Ahem. Uh, anyway, where
was I? Sorry. Uh, do...

- What sort of, um... assets do you own?
- Uh...

None. In terms of material wealth.

Oh.

Okay, listen. I... Unfortunately,
I think it's pretty unlikely

we're gonna be able to offer you
any kind of loan today, Joanna.

- Can I just get a credit card?
- Absolutely not.

- Right.
- No. But, um...

What I did wonder was whether
or not it would be okay to...

[TAPS DESK]

... ask for your number?

Jo? I thought you were staying at home.

Uh, yeah, the, uh... the bank,
uh... they blocked my card.

Fell for one of those
bloody text scam things.

Right.

Are you gonna take me home?

Nice belt.

- I found it on your bedroom floor, so...
- Mm-hmm.

♪ Que nul ne peut apprivoiser ♪

♪ Et c'est bien en vain
qu'on l'appelle... ♪

[WOMAN] Vivienne, your friend is here.

- Thanks, Mum. [SIGHS]
- ♪ Si tu ne m'aimes pas, je t'aime... ♪

[KNOCKING AT DOOR]

♪ Si je t'aime prends garde à toi ♪

♪ Prends garde à toi ! ♪

- Hey.
- Hey.

Oh, uh, this is my mate. Dave.

Dave.

[LATEX GLOVE SNAPS]

[DOCTOR] Do you take any
prescription medication?

Cipralex. For anxiety.

Are you a smoker?

I had one. Once.

I lost my voice. [CHUCKLES]

Do you have any health
issues in your family?

Blood pressure problems,
heart disease, cancer?

No. My mums are pretty healthy.

I don't know my dad.
He was a sperm donor.

Okay, you're all done.

- Was everything all right down there?
- Let's do some blood tests.

And I'm going to refer
you for an ultrasound.

Just to be on the safe side.

- [TRASH LID CLATTERS]
- [DROPS GLOVES]

- Hmm.
- [BELT BUCKLE JANGLES]

Why did you ask about my parents?

Well, some illnesses can be hereditary.

[BIRDSONG]

You know, I thought I was gay
for about a week when I was .

I saw this film with Clint Eastwood.

I couldn't stop thinking
about him carrying a g*n.

Then I realized I just
wanted to be Clint Eastwood,

not have sex with him.

Dad, this course you're doing
is making you really weird.

[MICHAEL LAUGHS]

I saw your friend...

Eric at school.

He said you weren't friends anymore.

And I thought maybe you'd
want to talk about it.

[GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING]

I'm okay.

I mean, it was hard.

But it doesn't...

hurt as much as it did.

Also, I'm not gay.

I'm bisexual.

They say Alexander the
Great may have been bisexual.

[PHONE CHIMES]

What is it?

It's a teacher from school
asking me out for dinner.

- A date?
- No. No, just dinner, I think.

She sent you a winky face.
She's asking you on a date.

You should go.

Is your mother seeing anyone?

Um...

[SIGHS]

She's taking self-defense classes,

and I think she might
be... dating her instructor.

Is it serious?

I think she's seeing a few people.

This is, uh... really good.

["DANCE ACROSS THE FLOOR"
BY JIMMY "BO" HORNE PLAYING]

I wanna wear this, but I
do want somethin' sparkly.

- Mmm!
- [ABBI] Oh, look who it is! Hey!

- No idea what to wear.
- You'll find something.

What about this? I reckon
it's more you than me anyway.

- [ABBI] Ooh, look at that.
- Ooh!

This could be a vibe.

- Do you want me to help?
- Yeah. Thank you.

- [ABBI] Got it?
- Yeah.

- Stunning.
- Yes!

That was made for you!

- Yes!
- I need a pic of this.

- And pose.
- Oh!

- Mmm!
- And pose.

- Oh, you look amazing.
- [CHIMES]

- No, I love it!
- Oh!

Your friend has put up a campaign video.

- [ERIC] Oh, okay!
- [AISHA] He's so cute.

Oh! [CHUCKLES]

How long have you guys been friends?

We've been best friends
since primary school.

[AISHA] You seem really different.

Yeah.

Yeah. No, we are. Uh... [LAUGHS]

He's always been my person,
though. But I guess...

I don't know. I guess, um...

Sometimes, I feel like he
doesn't entirely get me.

I think that's why I don't
have many straight friends.

Me either. So much emotional labor!

Aah! [LAUGHS]

I also think sometimes straight
people can just be a bit basic.

Okay, Roman. Let's not be
mean. Otis is Eric's friend.

I was only agreeing with Eric.

Sometimes it's just hard
to, you know, bridge the gap.

[ABBI] Okay, it's getting a bit heavy.

Do you know what we need?
We need some of this.

["FEELS LIKE I'M IN LOVE"
BY KELLY MARIE PLAYING]

♪ My head is in a spin ♪
♪ My feet don't touch the ground ♪

♪ Because you're near to me ♪
♪ My head goes round and round ♪

♪ My knees are shakin', baby ♪

- ♪ My heart it beats like a drum ♪
- [DOOR OPENS]

- Hey, what are you up to?
- Just homework.

- Do you want a snack?
- I'm good. Thanks.

I was gonna do a face mask and
watch a film later. You fancy it?

No, thanks. I'm good.

Okay.

[DOOR CLOSES]

[TABLET CHIMES]

I can't see anything.

The lens cap's still on.

Oh.

If you move that front dial to
the left, then it will focus.

The numbers behind
that are the aperture.

The lower the number,
the more light you let in.

And there's a self-timer
you can use as well.

[SHUTTER CLICKS]

Oh, right. Okay. Um...

[SHUTTER CLICKS]

- [GASPS] Are these for your portfolio?
- Yeah.

Can I?

Yeah, sure.

We moved around a lot
when we were younger.

- Have you always lived with your brother?
- Yeah.

- I wanna move out on my own soon, though.
- [AIMEE] Oh.

Maybe get a teaching degree and
earn a bit of money that way.

But I just don't know how
to talk to him about it yet.

I thought you did art just
'cause you liked painting.

- This looks very personal.
- Ah...

Yeah, I... I suppose...

I've had a lot of anger
growing up in care.

And painting helped me feel less, um...

sad.

Yeah.

When I got sad as a kid,

I'd bury all my mum's jewelry in
the garden so she couldn't find it.

- It's probably still there, actually.
- [LAUGHS] You're a maverick.

What does that mean?

It means that you don't
think like other people.

I thought that was being stupid.

No, no, no. It means that
you're your own person.

[TENDER MUSIC PLAYING]

- [DOOR OPENS]
- [JOE] I'm home.

Oh.

Do you have any cakes left?

Yeah, loads. Have 'em
all. Um... I've gotta go.

So... right now. [CHUCKLES]

Have a nice evening!

- Don't forget the camera.
- Oh, thank you.

- Bye!
- [ISAAC] Bye.

[JOE] Bit of a strange fish, that one.

I've had problems w*nk*ng and
fingering. I've had my heart broken...

If I was and still an
idiot, I'd vote for you.

- [CHUCKLES] Ah, thanks.
- ... I feel misunderstood a lot of the time.

- Ooh. It's already got views.
- So... I am a mess.

- Forty views is sh*t, Otis.
- All teenagers are.

- Yeah, well...
- That's why it's so important we can talk.

Thanks for all the help
today. You guys were great.

It's fine.

Righty-ho. I'm gonna
get the nachos ready.

We're watching Third
Wives of Miami tonight.

I thought you were seeing
Anwar and Olivia tonight?

Oh, our plans changed. Didn't
you have somewhere to be tonight?

Yeah, I need to find
out where I'm going.

["RESPECTABLE" BY MEL & KIM PLAYING]

[PHONE RINGING]

- I love you guys so much.
- Cheers.

Oh my goodness. Two
seconds. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

- Oh my God. I love this so much.
- Hello?

Hey. Uh, I am leaving now.

Shall I come to yours
or meet you at Roman's?

Okay.

- ♪ Explanation are complications... ♪
- Uh... Maybe meet us at the club?

- ♪ We don't need to know where or why... ♪
- Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, can do.

♪ Take, take, take, take... ♪

- Are you sure you still want me to come?
- Yes.

- Yeah, you... you should still come.
- ♪ Takin' chances, bold advances... ♪

Um... unless you don't want to.

♪ We're out of line... ♪

These guys are going to the
club now, so I wouldn't...

I wouldn't be on my own.

- ♪ Get out of here, we just... ♪
- Yeah.

- Yeah, no. I mean, that's cool. I'll...
- ♪ Take, take, take, take... ♪

You guys go. Yeah, you have fun.

- Um... I'll see you soon. Bye.
- ♪ Take or leave us... ♪

- [BEEPING]
- ♪ Believe us... ♪

- ♪ We ain't never gonna be respectable ♪
- [ABBI] You are everything.

f*ck.

- ♪ Like us, hate us... ♪
- Hey, Savior. Come on. Drink up.

- Yes, bitch uhhh!
- ♪ We ain't never gonna be... ♪

[SIGHS]

Did you get uninvited?

No, I decided not to go.

You so got uninvited.

Eric's friends with
the popular kids now,

and he doesn't want you tagging along.

That's harsh.

Even for you.

Oh my God. No, you're
actually upset. Okay.

Do you wanna stay for
nachos with me and my dad?

Uh...

I don't know, Ruby. I'm with Maeve
now. Kind of. It's a bit weird.

- What are you trying to say?
- Nothing.

Just that you're suddenly
being very nice to me.

- And you're helping me with this campaign.
- Don't flatter yourself.

If you must know, I went
to primary school with O.

Except she was called
Sarah Owen back then.

Never have I ever kissed
Henry Gold with tongues.

[GIGGLING]

New girl. Your go.

Can you not speak or something?

[GIRLS GIGGLING]

Never have I ever

wet the bed on school camp.

- [LAUGHTER]
- Oh my God. No.

Ruby, you need to drink.

She put the stinky piss
sheets under her mattress.

- Oh my God!
- I always knew she was a bed wetter!

- That's why she stinks.
- Pisser!

- [RUBY] Please stop!
- Bed wetter!

- Bed wetter!
- Bed wetter!

[CHANTING] Bed wetter! Bed
wetter! Bed wetter! Bed wetter!

[RUBY] They put the video
online, so everyone found out.

[OTIS] Ruby, that's awful.

- I'm sorry.
- [GIRLS] Bed wetter! Bed wetter!

You know, there's
nothing to be ashamed of.

And being bullied can easily
contribute to nocturnal enuresis.

- Ugh, I don't need you to go...
- It's a really...

... into therapist mode right now, Otis.

I saw a specialist.
Got it under control.

- Obviously.
- Well, I'm glad you spoke with someone.

[SIGHS]

I mean, primary school
was... hell, anyway.

I was the weird girl with the weird
parents whose mum made her clothes,

I didn't think it could get
worse. And then this happened.

I ate lunch every day in the
toilets by myself till I left.

Because nobody wants to
sit with the bed wetter.

[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]

Ruby. That's not fair.

No, don't. Please don't look at
me like that with the pity eyes.

- I will throw up.
- Okay.

- Looking at you with normal eyes.
- [SIGHS]

So this is about revenge.

I just think it's rich
that she's walking around,

preaching kindness, and pretending
she doesn't know who I am.

[FOOTSTEPS]

Rubes, I feel a bit dizzy. Uh...
I think I'm gonna have to lie down.

- Okay, Dad. Do you want some help?
- No. I'm okay.

Uh, nachos are in the oven.

Look, it's fine if you can't stay.
I get it's awkward with Maeve.

No, I want to.

- [BELL RINGS]
- [ELLEN] Yeah, I know. It's crazy.

[LAUGHS]

My mom and dad are so happy.

Writing's what I've always wanted
to do ever since I was a kid,

and used to put on plays and stuff.

- ["NEW RADIO" BY BIKINI k*ll ON EARBUDS]
- Yeah.

This is huge.

He knows everyone. It will
definitely help me get into Wallace.

I had a pretty good chance, but
now I probably will, you know?

I'm so lucky. I am so lucky.

- We just have the same style in writing...
- [TURNS VOLUME UP]

♪ So what the f*ck is written ♪

♪ All over your pretty face? ♪

- [BURPS]
- ♪ Come on! ♪

Chain rule. Course.

- I can't do it in my head...
- No shame in substitution.

Did you see that proof of the
chain rule with cobwebbing?

Yes! Yes, it was so interestin'.

- Ye...
- [BOWL RATTLES]

Right. Um, I better make
tracks. Thanks for the grub, Viv.

Uh...

- See you later, yeah?
- Yeah, sure.

- Bye, Dave.
- See ya.

And then t-here were two.
- [CHUCKLES]

[SIGHS]

So I was thinking we could get
a head start on trigonometry?

- Particularly cofunctioning identities.
- You're so smart.

Sorry, I know that was cringe,
but I... thought I'd say it.

You're really beautiful. You
love maths, and I love maths.

You're like my dream girl, basically.

Sorry, Um... I know that's a lot,

but I was talking to my dad about you,

and he said I should say how I feel.

- You spoke to your dad about me?
- I tell him everything.

We're close, but he's not
been well recently, um...

He had a stroke, so he
can't speak very well.

Can I... can I kiss you?

Um...

Yeah.

[BOTH LAUGH]

- [ERIC] Oh my God! Oh, it's gorgeous!
- [ABBI] Yes, bitch!

["LOVE VIBRATION" BY ESSEL PLAYING]

This is amazing! I'll catch
you up. I'll catch you in a bit.

This actually looks so insane.

[ABBI] You are gonna love it. Hi!

- No!
- I'm obsessed.

I am obsessed! [LAUGHS]

♪ Tired of holdin' back my tears ♪

♪ It's funny how you finally feel ♪

- ♪ Feel like yourself... ♪
- Cal?

Are you comin' in?

Yeah. I was going to, but I
didn't think I would know anyone.

You know me.

And I will look after you. Yeah?

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Let's go ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Can you feel the b*at? ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ We're gonna celebrate ♪

♪ I was feeling alone... ♪

- [ROMAN] Do you want some?
- Thanks.

Um, I'm not sure. [LAUGHS]

I'm kind of supposed to
go to church tomorrow.

It's totally cool if you don't want to.

- I don't do it.
- It's just I've never done it before.

Well, I'm not doing any tonight.

I'm here to keep you
safe if you want to.

You do you.

Oh...

- I want to!
- [ABBI] All right!

I want to, I want to,
I want to, I want to!

Oh my gosh. Okay.

- Cal, hold my hand.
- ♪ We're gonna celebrate ♪

- ♪ We're gonna celebrate ♪
- ♪ Yeah, yeah...

- When will I feel something?
- In about half an hour. It depends.

- Okay.
- Come on. Can we go dance now?

Yes!

♪ Whoo, ooh-ooh! ♪

[ADAM] Magdalena is so much happier
now that she's left her husband.

Mmm. I agree.

- She's glowing.
- Mmm.

[WOMAN ON TV] ... so intense,
just putting out fires all day...

Did you know that Dad thought he
was gay for a week when he was ?

No, no! I didn't know that.

But I think I did, too, though.

There was this girl
I sat behind in maths.

She had a really beautiful neck.

[CHUCKLES]

A teacher at school asked Dad on a date.

- [WOMAN ON TV] Oh!
- Oh.

Is he gonna go?

- Dunno.
- [WOMAN ON TV] He came out of your vag*na!

- There's no way he likes Margerita more.
- [WOMAN ON TV] He asks for Margerita...

Well, I...

- [WOMAN ] He said, "I want Margerita!"
- I'm glad he's moving on.

He's busy training, and
I'm really busy with...

So, Magdalena has
just filed for divorce,

and she's gotten highlights,
which have been very controversial.

But I've had a few people
looking through the window.

I think I'm gonna do a launch party.

You know, if... if people
found out what O did to you,

I don't think they'd vote for her.

You cannot tell anyone.

- I just thought you wanted to win.
- Not like this.

I'm a different person now.

Yeah, you are. What happened?

Nothing happened.

Just learned to protect myself
and stop letting my mum dress me.

... husband was born again,
and already being humiliated.

Hey!

[SIGHS] Ahem.

So, what's happened with you and Maeve?

[OTIS] Nothing.

She's just over there
doing all these new things,

and meeting all these new people, and...

I sometimes feel like
I'm getting left behind.

Well, if it makes you feel any better,

I wasn't going to hang out with
Anwar and Olivia this evening.

They have made loads of new friends,

and they don't have time to see me.

I'm glad we're hanging out.

Stop talking, Otis.
You're ruining the episode.

[GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING]

[CHUCKLES]

- [KNOCKING AT DOOR]
- Come in.

- Hi.
- Hi, Maeve.

- [DOOR CLOSES]
- Can I help you with something?

Yeah, um... I was wondering
if you've had a chance

to read my new chapter yet.

Yeah, I have.

Okay, great. Um, what did you think?

I thought it was a little soapy.
I could see what you were doing.

It was like a Victorian novel
set in a modern-day trailer park,

but it was underdeveloped, and the
characters weren't fully realized.

Oh, okay.

I thought I'd taken on your feedback.

- Trying to write from a more honest place.
- [CLEARS THROAT]

[SIGHS]

What did Ellen do differently?

She... she just told us
she got the internship.

I think she showed great potential.

Why? Do you disagree with my choice?

Do you somehow feel like
you are more deserving?

No! No. I just...

I'd like to know what I can
do to be better and get ahead.

Well, after reading that,
and your Brontë piece,

I'm not sure you're
cut out to be a writer.

We have very high standards here.

And like I said in our first class,

writing is a very tough business,

so I wouldn't want you
to... get your hopes up.

[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]

Okay.

Thanks for reading it.

Okay.

[GASPS]

- [ELLEN] Maeve?
- Yeah?

They wanna see you at the front office.

Someone from the UK is on the phone.

- I think they said it's your brother.
- Okay. Thanks.

♪ Lights, camera, action ♪

- ♪ Too loose with the satisfaction... ♪
- Wow! Yes, baby.

- You look amazing.
- Thanks!

♪ Take a picture ♪
♪ I know you're watching ♪

♪ Front row seats... ♪

You go, you go! You go! Yes, bitch!

- Call me, baby!
- ♪ We can make a movie, baby ♪

♪ I can be your main star ♪

- Are yer havin' a good time?
- Yes!

Oh my God! Roman, I love you.

I love you too!

- So much!
- Aww!

Why is that man starin' at us?

Are we naked?

♪ Movie star ♪

♪ Call me Cleo... ♪

I know him! He goes to my church!

- ♪ Call me Cleo... ♪
- Hot Church Man!

- He's coming over here.
- No. Oh no!

No! He's gonna know that I'm high!

And then he's gonna tell my pastor,

and God will know that I've done dr*gs.

[ROMAN] He's here.

I'm not naked!

I can see that.

[ROMAN] Okay.

I'm leavin'.

Want some?

Yeah.

["STRUT" BY BIG FREEDIA
AND ELOHIM PLAYING]

Uh-huh...

Jesus is...

[ECHOING] Oh!

♪ Bam bam ♪

♪ f*ck the sidewalk ♪

♪ It's a runway ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Take the Uber ♪

♪ f*ck the Uber ♪

♪ Take the airplane ♪

♪ f*ck the airplane ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ Strut, strut ♪

♪ f*ck a Seiko... ♪

I like your necklace.

Thanks, I'm an Aries.

Let me see. You're also an Aries?

How did you guess?

Oh, it's my thing.

Are Aries supposed to
be compatible together?

Hmm. Big fights, but
very good make-up sex.

[CAL] Whoa!

I don't know much about star
signs. My mum reads them, but I...

♪ Ain't polite about it
I'm like, "Ho, be nice" ♪

♪ For what? I make it look easy ♪

[MUFFLED] ♪ Make a hater feel queasy ♪

♪ Leave 'em sick, I leave 'em shook... ♪

I'm sorry. I have to see your lips.

It's so dark in here.

I thought you wanted to kiss me.

- Hey, babe. Ooh! Okay, you look good.
- Ooh!

Wanna come bar with me?

Oh, have you met my partner PK?

[LAUGHING] Hi.

I'm feeling hot. I need some air.

- Oh.
- ♪ f*ck the Waldorf... ♪

Bye.

You're gonna feel rough
at church tomorrow.

Ah, I don't think I'm gonna go.

How come?

Well... [SIGHS]

Pastor Samuel...

Mmm?

He basically said that I
need to stay in the closet.

- Ah.
- Ah.

- Yeah.
- Mmm.

That doesn't surprise me.

Do you ever just wanna say f*ck this?

And not go anymore?

Sometimes.

But it's my community.

My family.

[SIGHS] It's...

[SIGHS] ... my heart.

I can't cut it out.

[BANGING]

[BOY] Can you hurry up? Some
people actually need to take a sh*t!

[LAUGHING]

♪ When the bass line hits ♪

♪ Don't need the bunny ♪
♪ Just drums and sh*t ♪

♪ Let's bang to the bang ♪
♪ Put it on repeat ♪

♪ Good girl... ♪

- All right?
- Mm-hmm.

♪ A good b*at that
makes her body dance ♪

♪ Everything's taller... ♪

I've noticed that
you've had top surgery.

Oh, sorry. I'm just
a bit high right now.

It's just I don't know that
many other trans people,

and I wanna get mine done, and I
don't know what to expect, so...

[LAUGHS]

It looks great on you, by the way.

- Thanks.
- Mmm.

I had it done last year.

Honestly, it was the best
decision I've ever made.

I finally just feel like myself.

I've been on the waiting
list for my GIC appointment

for three years, almost.

And, I dunno, I'm hoping
it's not much longer.

I saw a private consultant to
get my T because I couldn't wait.

Things are really bad right now.

People wait up to five years
for their first appointment,

and then it can be another
few years on top of that

to get your surgery.

I was lucky. I went private.

Baby, you have to come in.
They're playing our song.

- Come dance with us?
- ♪ In a heartbeat ♪

- ♪ I bang all the way into Wall Street ♪
- Sure.

♪ Tell 'em back down ♪
♪ Make way for the real freak ♪

♪ b*at go hard with a bang ♪
♪ I just bang my way to... ♪

- [OTIS SIGHS]
- [BIRDSONG]

- Mmm...
- Sorry, I don't know how I fell asleep.

- Yeah. No, I don't know how that happened.
- Yeah.

Yeah, I'm sorry.

Sorry.

[SIGHS]

Look, Otis, don't worry
about it. We just fell asleep.

Yeah.

[MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS]

My phone's out of battery, and
my mum's gonna be worried, so I...

Charge it here, and then I
could give you a lift home?

Uh... I'd really better go.

Look, let's meet up tomorrow
morning and work out next steps.

And I think you should talk to Maeve.

Just let her know that
you're feeling left behind.

I will.

Thanks for everything.

[GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING]

[SNORING]

[SIGHING]

[GROANING]

[MOANS]

- We are going to church now.
- Mmm!

- I'd like it if you came with us.
- Um...

- I don't think I'm gonna go today, Mum.
- But there's a lunch after the service.

Auntie Oni has made puff-puff.

[SISTER] Why do we have to go to church?

[CLEARS THROAT]

Yeah, no. I do... I do
love Auntie Oni's puff-puff.

I'm just... I'm just so tired
today, Mum. I'm so sorry.

[SIGHS]

Hmm.

[SIGHS]

[GROANS]

Ow.

["OUR LIPS ARE SEALED"
BY THE GO-GO'S PLAYING]

♪ There's a w*apon ♪

♪ That we must use... ♪

- [CAMERA CLICKING]
- ♪ In our defense ♪

♪ Silence ♪

♪ When you look at them ♪

♪ Look right through them ♪

♪ That's when they'll disappear ♪

♪ That's when we'll be feared ♪

♪ It doesn't matter what they say ♪

- ♪ In the jealous games people play ♪
- [JOY CRYING]

Sh, sh, sh, sh, sh, sh, shhh.

[FRONT DOOR CLOSES]

Mum, I'm home.

Hello, darling. Did you have fun?

I didn't go.

I need to charge my phone.

Oh f*ck!

Stupid, long piece of
f*cking piece of fabric. sh*t!

[SOBBING]

[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]

[JOY CONTINUES CRYING]

♪ I don't know what I was thinking... ♪

[SIGHS]

♪ Reachin' out beyond my grasp ♪

♪ Liftin' up these wings ♪
♪ To try to take to the sky ♪

- ♪ As if I wasn't tied... ♪
- [RINGING TONE]

♪ To this -ton past ♪

- [MAEVE] Hello.
- Hey. Sorry, my phone was out of battery.

Um, Maeve, I'm really sorry we fought.

And I said some stupid things.

And I should have been more supportive.

You were right. I... I was being...

Otis, it doesn't matter.
I'm going to the airport.

My mum's in hospital. She's
had an overdose. It's serious.

- ♪ I see so much open space... ♪
- What?

- ♪ In front of me... ♪
- I'm coming home.

- ♪ But I don't get too far because... ♪
- [LINE BEEPS]

[SIGHS]

♪ The tether pulls me back ♪

♪ The tether pulls me back ♪

♪ The tether pullin' me back ♪

♪ The tether always pulls me back ♪

♪ I thought I should let you know that ♪

♪ You'll be seein' me around ♪

♪ Tryin' to let go of anything ♪

♪ I might be draggin' with me ♪

♪ As I make my way back down ♪

♪ The tether pulls me back ♪

♪ The tether always pulls me back ♪