01x03 - Episode 3

[bunniefuu]

Hey, do we have a "judge trudy" sketch tonight?

I don't know. I haven't read the script yet.

Food's here.

All right! Dinnertime!

Yes!yes!

Ok, amanda, you had the pizza.

Raquel had the turkeyburger.

Thank you.

And drake...

Had...

The lobster.

[Chattering]

[Chattering]

Nice going.

Uh.

Boring.

Grrr!

Garbage!

Bye-bye.

Ooh!

Aah!

Oh.

Hey!

Lights! Lights!

Shabow!

Mm-hmm.

Howdy, actors!

Gimme!

See ya!

Hammer time!

Ah.

Shabow!

Cool guys!

Love ya, dan!

Camera!

Sound!

Ha ha!

Coming!

Hey! Ow! Ow!

[Gasp]

Boingity-boing.

Ah!

Huh?

[Cheering]look out!

♪ Ah...

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Show

Let's go!

Yay! Woo!

Thanks for coming!

My name's amanda,

And welcome to my show!

Ha ha ha!

Thank you!

All right. You are one lucky audience,

Because today we have an amazing show for you.

Hi. Can I help you?

Yeah. I'm looking for an amanda.

I'm an amanda.

Sign for a package, please.

Oh, wow. What is it?

It's a box, ma'am.

Bye.

Wow!

Huh.

Well, I guess I should open it.

I'll go get my crowbar.

I'll be back in a second!

[Thumping]

[Audience screams]

Hello, audience. My name is penelope taynt.

I'm amanda's number one fan, please.

I have my own amanda web site.

Man: I've seen it! Www.amandaplease.com.

Thank you, please. Where's amanda?

She went that way to get a tool.

Amanda, please!

[Audience applauds]

What happened here?

Some crazy woman busted out of it

Like a-- like a crazy woman!

Oh, ok. Well, stick around.

We'll be back in a second to do stuff. Woo!

Bye!

Hippopotamus.

H-i-p-p-o...

P-o-t-a-m-u-s?

Right.

[Telephone rings]

Hello?

Yeah. Is your refrigerator running?

Yeah, I think so.

Then you'd better go catch it!

Man, I hate prank phone calls.

Ditto.

Oh.oh.

Let's call zap him.

[Telephone rings]

Hello?

[Buzz]

Aah!

[Laughing]

Hello?

[Buzz]

Aah!

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Show

Announcer: it's...

Yeah!

Ha!

Ha!

Ha!

You hamburgers are no match for me!

You understand me, hamburgers?

You're dead meat!

Hah!

[Clang clang clang]

Dinnertime!

Aah!

Ah!

Ah!

Hoo!ah!

[Roaring]

Dinnertime, son!

I heard the bell, dad.

[Crunch]aah!

Ah!

Uhh!

[Roaring]

Break it up!

[Clang]

[Roaring] [roaring]

Grrrr!

Hold it!

What is it?why did you stop us from eating these hamburgers?

You do not eat dinner until your sister gets home.

You understand me?

[Roaring]

Where is my daughter?

I'm home!

Grrrrr!

You are late! Late! Late!

Where have you been?

I stayed after school to try out for cheerleading.

Grrrrr!

Did you make cheerleading?

[Hisses]

No, I did not.

[Roar]

Why not?

Those jerks said I was not feminine enough.

[Hisses]

What? My little princess not feminine?

Grrrrr!

Grrrr!

What cheer did you use?

I gave them my best cheer!

It goes: pow! Punch 'em!

Smack 'em in the head!

Kick 'em! Punch 'em!

You're dead, dead, dead!

You do not destroy a lamp like that.

Yes, you do.

You do not.

You destroy a lamp like this.

Grrrrr!

Grrrrr!

That is how you destroy a lamp.

That was a sissy punch.

Now I must call you captain candypants.

Don't talk to me that way, sister.

Whatcha gonna do about it, brother?

You wanna meet me in a no-holds-barred cage match?

Any time, sucker, any time.

Children!

I will not tolerate this arguing

While there is warm meat on the table.

Now, sit down and eat, you two,

Or I will pile drive you both!

[Clang clang clang]

Let's get ready to eat dinner!

[Clang]

Good gosh almighty.

This hamburger is very tough.

Extremely tough.

I have to say, this piece of meat

Is one of the toughest pieces of meat

I have ever had to face.

What is wrong with you people?

I have never seen a bigger bunch of wimps in all my born days.

If your meat is tough, do something about it.

Grrrrr!

Your mother is right.

Hyah!

Aah!

Grrrrr!

This meat is too tough!

Well, don't go crying to me.

Order a pizza.

Well, ok!

[Dials phone]

Hello, pizza place?

Yeah, I want large pizzas, and I want 'em covered in meat.

What? Minutes?!

Do you know who you're talking to?

It's babs wrestleberg.

I want this pizza here in seconds,

Or I'll pound you like a baby hippo.

, , , ...

, ...[Brakes squeal]

, --Ok, ok.

Here's your pizzas.

About time, punk.

Hey, you're supposed to pay me.

Pay ya?!

I'll pay ya!

Aah!

Oh, my eyes!

I can't see!

Oh! Ah!

Aah!

Yah!

Oh! Oh!

Oh!

[Crunch]

Oh!

, , !

All right.

Get out of here, punk!

Grrrrrr!

Oh, yeah! All right!

[Shouting]

Pizza!

Wait!

[Clang]

[Shouting]

Ah!

Oh!

[Shouting and roaring]

[Bell clangs]

Here, dumples!

Come here, boy.

Ha ha! Good boy.

Now, lie down.

Good boy! Now sit up.

Good boy. Now speak.

[Ruff ruff ruff]

Good boy. Now sing.

[Howls]

Good boy. Now dance.

[Hums]

Good boy.

Now, make me some sushi!

[Chatters]

[Chatters with japanese accent]

Good boy. Now, disassemble yourself.

Good boy! Now, reassemble yourself, but as a sports car.

Good boy.

Now, let's go to the mall!

Hey there, and welcome to the girls' room.

All right.all right. All right.

The show where our guests are

Whoever walks in the girls' room.

Ha ha!

Now, I'm amber,

Which most of you already know because I'm extremely popular.

I'm sheila. Get used to it.

My name's tammy.

I'm an exchange student from tennessee.

Speak, girl.

Oh.

When does the show start?

When does your brain start?

Don't be mean.

Her name is debbie.

I'm debbie.

The show just started, and she's already twangin' my last nerve.

Thanks.

As an exchange student from tennessee,

I'd like to say, sheila, you should put away your anger.

And debbie, you should put away your stupid.

Amber: thanks, tammy.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

Well, actually, I could've.

But moving on, today on the girls' room,

We're gonna talk about the pop quiz miss yumbo gave us in math class.

My name's debbie.

Welcome to the show.

Ok. Back to the pop quiz.

What was with that word problem about a train leaving boston?

I skipped that question

Because trains confuse me.

And what doesn't?

As an exchange student from tennessee,

I enjoy trains.

And squirrel casseroles.

[Toilet flushes]

Oh, it sounds like our first guest is ready.

Hey there. Welcome to the girls' room.

Hi! Hi! Hi!

Huh?

How did you feel about miss yumbo's pop quiz?

I think I did well.

Oh, yeah? But did you make cheerleader and pep squad

And go to the spring dance with rick allen?

No.i did.

True.

You go, girl.

I like eggs.

Do you guys have permission

To do a cable show inside the girls' bathroom?

No, but I gave myself permission to push you out that door.

Thanks for stopping by the girls' room.

Come back now.

Some trains go "woo woo."

You guys, there's a teacher.

Oh, boy. I love pop quizzes

Even more than I love being popular.

I just enjoy school in general.

I love school, teachers, and pop quizzes.

Hey, "train" rhymes with "stain."

And it also rhymes with "brain."

Get one.

[Toilet flushes]

Sounds like our next guest is ready.

Hi, miss yumbo. Welcome to the girls' room.

Hello, girls.

Debbie: hey.

Ah.

Oh.

So, are you going to interview me

On your bathroom show?

Sure. Um, why don't you tell us about yourself?

Well, I was born in boise, idaho--

Thanks for being on the show. But--

Bye-bye. Bye. Bye.

See you later.

Bye, daddy.

Ok. Next topic.

Josh elliott.

Oh! Oh! Oh!

Josh elliott so loves me.

You are so crazy, because he loves me.

As an exchange student from tennessee,

I think I saw josh elliott looking at me in study hall.

Study hall rhymes with...

Study hall!

Anyways, let's find out who josh elliott has a crush on.

Ok. Ahem.

Hey! Hey! What's going on?

Sheila: ask him.

Josh elliott, who do you have a crush on?

None of you.

Sheila, take care of him.

Hey, what are you doing? Hey!

[Toilet flushes]

Josh: hey! Hey! Come on! No!

Hey! Come on!

Aah!

Well, that's all the time for the girls' room.

And remember, I'm popular!

I'm bad.

I'm from tennessee.

Hi!

Announcer: it's time for a hillbilly moment.

Ha ha ha!

[Hillbilly accent] hey, knock knock.

[Hillbilly accent] ha ha ha! Who's there?

Uh, rag doll.

Rag doll who?

I'm gonna hit you in the head with a rag doll.

Huh?

Ha ha!

Ha ha ha ha! That's a good 'un.

Yup.

Ha ha ha!

♪ A

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Manda manda manda manda manda ♪

♪ Show

This is very exciting.

We're quite close to crowning this year's champion

In the regional smelling bee.

Our next finalist is celia fargate.

Celia.

Mrs. Ashmore.

The next item, please.

Contest host: identify the smell.

[Sniffs]

It's a...

Chocolate cake, with...

[Sniffs]

Vanilla icing and...

[Sniffs]

It's on top of a large fish.

[Buzzer sounds]

Oh, I'm sorry.

That's incorrect.

Oh! Oh!

Aah!

The icing was, indeed, coconut.

Ha ha ha ha!

Well, it appears that we are now down to two contestants.

The smells will now become difficult.

Good luck. Sniff well.

Mrs. Ashmore, the next item, please.

Identify the smell.

Uh...[Sniff] it's an old woman.

A lonely, lonely old woman.

I'm sorry. That's mrs. Ashmore.

Mrs. Ashmore, please step aside.

Very lonely.

All right!

Heather?

Smell.

All right...it's definitely an animal in some sort of footwear.

It's a skunk in a sneaker!

Wait.

Left foot or right?

[Sniff]left!

[Bell rings]

Correct!

[Audience applauds]yes!

You smell good!

Thank you.

I smell all the time.

Nobody smells more than me.

All right.

Ha ha ha ha!

Isn't she precious?

Mrs. Ashmore, the next item, please.

Ok.

Really big underwear...

[Sniffs]

That haven't been washed in two weeks.

Mrs. Ashmore, please step aside.

Adam...

Oh! This smells even worse than mrs. Ashmore!

Why say it?

Identify the smell.

[Sniffs]

Ok. It's a pair of...

Dirty, old, sweaty army boots...

With....

A spoiled glass of milk in one shoe...

And a rotten egg in the other!

[Bell rings]correct!

[Audience applauds]

There is some exceptional smelling going on at this bee.

Mrs. Ashmore, the next item, please.

Heather,

It is under your nose.

Uh, it's definitely some sort of freeloader.

[Sniffs]

It's either a vagrant or a hobo.

[Sniffs]

I'm gonna go with hobo.

[Sniffs]

A hobo with a sandwich.

Can you be more specific?

[Sniffs]

Tuna salad, chopped celery,

And way too much mayo.

[Bell rings]correct!

[Audience applauds]

Can I keep the sandwich?

No!

[Horn blares]

Oh, I see we're out of time.

To determine our winner, we will go into a sudden-death smell-off.

Our smellers will sniff the same item,

And the first to correctly identify the item wins.

Mrs. Ashmore.

Contestants.

Identify the smell.

I guess there won't be a winner in this year's...

This year's... [Sniff sniff]

Oh. Mrs. Ashmore, would you mind lowering your arms?

Oh, it's not that bad.

Man, I reek!

[Playing guitar]

Announcer: from his garage,

It's totally kyle.

Um....

One time, I went to my grandmother's house,

And she's, like, really, really old.

And she made me, like, this oatmeal for breakfast.

Which was weird, 'cause I don't usually, like, eat oatmeal for breakfast.

So I was all freaking out.

But then I remembered

I was at my grandmother's house,

Ok?

Announcer: that was totally kyle.

Totally!

[Playing guitar]

[Gasp]

Amanda?

No, I'm jennifer.

I'm the costume designer for the show.

Don't care. I want to see amanda.

And who are you?

My name is penelope taynt.

I just happen to be amanda's number one fan, please.

Hmm.

Do you have a backstage pass?

Yes.

Can I see it?

No.

I have my own amanda web site, you know--

Www.amandaplease.com.

Here, I'll show it to you

On this actual computer.

Penelope: see? Here's the home page,

Which I update every thursday, please.

Now, if you click here,

You can see amanda's baby pictures.

Look, there's amanda when she was a baby.

Note the binky.

Oh, here's amanda as a small pine tree.

Her tiny face is surrounded by green fabric.

Click.

And here you see little amanda on her tricycle,

A -wheeled vehicle.

Back to the home page, where you'll see tons of other amanda clickables to click upon.

Very impressive web site.

I know.

Where's amanda?

She's in there getting dressed.

Man: costumes!

[Gasp]

Locked!

Oh!

Ohhhh...

All right!

Did you guys like the show?

[Audience cheers]

Good.

Hey, you know what?

I'm kinda hungry. Are you guys hungry?

Audience: yes!

Hey, I know. How about you guys come over to my house for dinner?

Let's go!

[Audience cheers]

Cool. I'll drive.

Come on!

[Audience cheers]

Amanda! Amanda, please!

Hello, please. Amanda?

Where's amanda?

[Gasp]

Where's the live studio audience?

You just missed 'em.

Your words confuse me.

Explain, please.

Amanda took everybody over to her house.

For what?

A party.

Balloons and snacks and such.

Snacks?yup.

Maybe chicken wings.

But I've got to meet amanda!

I'm her number one fan, please.

Would you do a puppet show for me?

No.

Oh, that's wack.

Amanda!

Wait! Wait!

I'm your number one fan!

Amanda please.