04x05 - Walk Like a Man/A Friend Indeed

[bunniefuu]

[ Clock chiming, thunderclap]

[ Creaking]

[ Owl hooting]

[ Shrieking]

[ Crying]

[ Gasps]

[ Screaming]

I can smell you from here!

[ Needle scratching record]

[ Chuckles]

This is exposia vertov

With a special,
live report.

I'm at the sinks
n' stuff store

Where rock
superstar suede

Is expected soon
to do some shopping.

We don't know what
suede is purchasing

And calls to store
manager bob hurley

Have gone unanswered.

Live!

This is the biggest moment

In the history of this store.

So I don't want this place clean

I want it spotless.

You understand
that, todd?

Huh?

Oh, never mind.

Just watch the door.

I'm going to fire that kid.

No-good, lazy good-for...

Will you look

At the size
of that hair?

[ Air blowing]

Do I have to do everything?

[ Roaring]

[ Screaming]

Krumm, that was great.

Good old smitty
never lets me down.

Hey, let's explore
a little, huh?

[ Both giggling]

We have to get back
to class.

Come on, oblina, live a little.

I will not live a little.

Besides, exploring
was not in the deal we...

[ Gasps]

I'm in heaven!

Hello, there, hideous.

Where have you been all my life?

Ickis, it's only
a toilet.

This, my friend, is a chariot.

Destined to go great places.

Can you imagine launching a spin
in a sewer from this hot rod?

Vroom, vroom, vroom.

[ Imitating engine]

[ Laughing]

Ickis! Stop that.

Ah, buzz off, sister,
I'm bonding here.

Don't mind her.

We won't be disturbed again.

Rock superstar suede

Is now arriving
at sinks n' stuff.

Live!

[ Crowd cheering
hysterically]

[ Panting]

Lock that door, man.

Huh?

Excuse me.

Let me through.

Ickis, we better
go now.

Okay, okay, just one more vroom.

No more vrooms,
come on!

You guys take the vent,
I'll take the sewer.

But it's not...

See you later. Bombs away!

[ Crashing]

Suede is now
in the process

Of selecting a toilet.

Live!

I'll take that one.

Exposia:
he's picked out
the megabowl .

And you saw it
all here.

Live!

One of these
days, krummy

We are not going
to rescue that monster.

Careful.
The last one

Had a monster in it.

A what?

Suede:
a big, old, fangy-
toothed monster.

So watch it.

Man:
okay, boss,
you got it.

[ Laughing]

Oh, look out there,
mr. Monster.

[ Laughing]

Ooh...

[ Roaring]

Well, thanks for dropping by.

Don't mention it.

We are late for class.

Might I suggest we go home now?

All right, all right.

Don't get your stripes
in a bunch.

We will go home just as soon
as I climb out of this thing.

[ Groaning]

[ Crying]

I'm stuck.

What do you mean?

I loomed too much

And got wedged
in this thing

And no matter
how hard I try

I cannot unloom
and get out!

He means
he's stuck.

Ickis:
don't just
stand there

Do something!

Help me get out.

We would be delighted.

[ Creaking]

Oh...

[ Crying]

[ Hammers clanging]

Hmm...

[ Ickis screaming]

[ Groaning]

Ickis, did you
come unstuck?

No, thanks, aunt bluebell,
I'm on a diet.

Do not worry, we
will help you
get out

One way or another.[ Drill whirring]

No! No! No! No!
No! No! No!

No more helping.

I cannot take
any more help.

Ickis, I know
it looks bad

But there has got
to be a solution.

Really, like what?

I've a got a two-ton toilet
around my waist!

What do you expect me to do?

Just waltz out the door
looking like this?

Bad fashion choice.

Oh!

Well, no,
not exactly.

Ickis:
this is never
going to work.

Never, never, never.

It is our
only chance.

I am a monster, not a human.

You better start
acting human.

Someone's
coming!

Hey, there.
[ Laughing nervously]

Fellow human.

"Fellow human"?

That is the best
you could do?

Well, excuse me,
miss expert-on-how-humans-speak.

Somebody's coming again.

Krumm:
fighting won't
get us anywhere.

Oblina:
we should find
a way to get home.

There is no way!

We can't just call
a garbage truck

To take us home.

Taxi!

All right, so there isa way.

Now, ickis, what you
have to say here is...

Oblina!

I am not stupid, all right?

I was listening.

I know what to say.

Trixie!

[ Tires screech]

See? I told you.

Where to, pal?

To the dump.

Trixie.

[ Snarling]

[ Whimpering]

[ Blubbering]:
we will never see
the dump again.

Now, now, ickis,
cheer up.

Krumm and I may be
angry with you

And you may have
endangered us

With this stunt

Which is nothing compared

To what the gromble
will do to us

If we get home.

Is this the
"cheering-up" part yet?

But we are still
your friends, dear.

And we have faith
that you will take

Responsibility
for your actions

And find the courage
to get us home!

You're right, I can do it.

I will get us home if I have
to walk all the way back.

Because I am a monster,
and a monster can do anything!

Hop on my bowl, you two.

'Cause you know what?
[ Giggling]

This monster is walking home.

[ Screams]

[ Crashing,
glass shattering]

Okay, okay,
no problem.

I will still get
us home.

This is only a minor setback.

And just what do you think
you're doing?

Us? Uh, me?

I'm just walking home
to the du...

I... Du...
[ Giggling nervously]

Detroit, detroit.

[ Sighs]

We run things

A little different
around here.

Do you know what
the penalty

For jaywalking is
in this city?

A... Snorching?

What was that?

[ Growls]

I mean, uh, I mean...

I don't know, but...

I don't know, but...

Oblina:
if I did anything wrong...

If I did anything wrong...
I'm very sorry.

I am very sorry.
Good job.

Good job!

Don't say that,
ickis.

Don't say that,
ickis.
No, no, no!

No, no, no!
[ Squeals]

I guess I'll just

Give you a ticket this time

But watch it.

Oh, thank you.

Hey, what's the big idea?

I think I should run now.

You're right.

Hey! Come back here!

This big fellow

Just stepped right
in front of my car...

Police officer:
am pursuing
fugitive jaywalker

Heading east
on fillmore.

That was suede.

Rock star suede

Is now being chased

By a police officer--
live!

[ Panting]:
I'm going to make it!

I'm not going to make it.

Krumm:
I have an idea.

Quick, turn here.

Ickis:turning.

I can't believe it,
he's gone.

Hey, hey, isn't that
suede's toilet?

[ Excited cheering]

After that toilet!

[ Cheering]

All units, am now in pursuit
of a marble toilet

With large purple ears.

Got any more great ideas?

I cannot take this running
much longer!

If we shift some weight,
you can go faster.

[ Tires screech]

The toilet is now
rolling west

On river street.

Strike that.

Fugitive toilet

Is now flyingwest
overriver street.

Hey, I think we stopped.

[ Yelling]

Hi, ickis,
where you going?

That was ickis.

[ Screaming]

[ Yelps]

[ Screams, crashing]

What? What?

Ickis, if you ever...

So I messed up a little bit.

But, hey, we had an adventure
and we got home safe.

Isn't that what really matters?

Gromble:
no, ickis.

What really matters

Is that you dropped
a massive toilet

On my head!

[ Giggling nervously]

Can I keep it?

No, you can't
keep it.

While you three
are being snorched

I shall dispose of this
offensively inappropriate piece

Of contraband personally.

And then
the whole megilla

Just took off
in the sky

Like a big
flying toilet

That's what it did.

So there you have it.

Live!

The mystery of
the rock star's

Flying toilet.

What thing possessed

The phantom
plumbing fixture

We can only guess.

Where that toilet
is now

We may never know.

[ Engine revving]

[ Gromble laughing]

[ Engine revving]

[ Gromble laughing
ecstatically]

Vroom! Vroom!

Vroom...

Go, gromble racer, go!

Pchoo, pchoo, pchoo.

[ Blowing raspberry]

[ Laughing]

Oh, this is going to be great!

[ Giggling gleefully]

[ Grunting]

Herb? Do we have a carrot?

[ Continues grunting]

Aw, there's a pretty
little bunny.

[ Screeches]

Yuck!

[ Crying]

Oh, did I get a third eye? No.

Or big giant fangs
and a thousand tiny legs?

No.

I get floppy ears!

Why can't I look like glog

Or borl or spoop or erbab?

Oh, forget it.

Forget it!

I'm not anybody scary.

I'm...

[ Chuckling]

[ Low growl]

[ Roars]

[ Chuckles]

[ Breaks into
full laughter]

Hello? Excuse me.

[ Continues]

Stop it!

[ Composing himself]

I'm, I'm sorry, kid.

Nice scare.

Oh... [ Chuckles]

You think so?

I'm so glad.

One question...

Why weren't you scared?!

I'm sorry, kid.

If you're looking
for a human to scare

You're out of luck.

[ Gulps] you're--

Just like you, kid.

Well, why aren't
you underground?

You don't want
to know.

Yes, I do.

You want to know
why I left the monster world?

It's because I look...

Like this.

[ Yelping]

Despite the unexcused absence
of master ickis

We're just going
to have to begin.

Bappy, if you will.

[ Roaring]

[ Moaning]

[ Gasps]

Kid, you all right?

You, you look...

Your face!

Your face, it looks...

Human!

And you got ears
like the easter bunny.

I bet...

Who cares
if I have big ears?!

It does not mean
I am not a monster.

Who cares if I got a human face?

Oh, that is different!

I mean, it's...

You're right.

I'm sorry.

The name's plastoog, kid.

What's yours?

Mud.

What?

I just remembered

Even if I make it to class

I did not get my scare.

I'm sunk.

Maybe not.

Come on.

Well, kid

There it is.

[ Screaming]

Excellent, zooeuh.

Well done.

Well, that's everybody.

Ickis:
well, I don't know

About that.

Oh, I'm so sorry
I was a tad late

Old man.

But, you know,
an exceptional scare

Is like fine slime.

It must age, mature.

One must wait
for just the right moment.

[ Chuckles]

[ Elevator bell rings]

[ Collective gasp]

He walked into a mall.

Too many people--
he'll never pull it off.

Oblina:
they'll see him.

They're going to catch him.

I can't watch.

[ Playing "chopsticks"]

[ Ickis snarling]

[ Screaming]

[ Roars]

[ Screaming]

[ Oohing and ahing]

[ Applause][ gromble gasps]

That was you?

[ Chuckles]

That was me.

This stinking weed of scaring
has finally blossomed.

I have realized my potential.

Ickis

That was magnificent!

I know.

[ Cheering and applause]

Ickis:
they loved it!

Oh, it was great!

You're amazing!

I'm amazing.

You know, I get around you

And I think,
who cares what we look like?

We are scary.
[ Giggles]

Ah, you must have been
great in school.

Head of my class.

Oh! If you can scare like that

Oh, you should come back.

Ahh, not a chance, kid.

I'm never going back.

Nobody cares how you scare.

All they care about
is what you look like.

That is not true!

Look at me, I don't care
that you look like...

Like a game show host.

Right!

What's a game show host?

It's the worst thing
you can imagine.

Ickis, when I was a student

Everyone laughed at me.

[ Taunting]:
♪ human, human, human!

I didn't have a friend
in the world.

I-i take that back.

One quiet little guy,
he stuck by me.

But that wasn't enough.

Even with a friend

I knew I could never have
a normal monster life.

So I left.

But it's not like that anymore--

Not where I go to school.

Why would it change?

No... I'm not going back

And don't you dare
tell anyone I'm here.

They'd be up here
in a second

Laughing and pointing.

I couldn't bear it.

Promise me.

Ickis, promise me

You won't tell anyone
you've seen me.

I promise.

Good. Now
let's go scaring.

[ Each grunts]

Plastoog:
is this the place?

This is it.

[ Rings]

Goodness, have I won something?

Why, yes, indeed.

It's a brand-new

Improved
state-of-the-art...

Rabbit!

[ Screams]

Nice!

Thank you.

Excuse me

Is this the home
of marge miller?

Plastoog:
say, aren't you...

[ Starts growling]

[ Screaming]

[ Screams]

[ Tires squealing]

This is great!

I've never ridden

Insidea car before.

So where we going?

[ Squeaking]

[ Screams]

[ Tires squealing]

[ Motor revving]

[ Roaring]
[ screaming]

[ Ickis clears throat]

[ Screaming]

[ Tires squealing]

It has been years--

Goodness, probably
years-- since

I've seen such innovation...

Such originality.

I don't know
what's happened to you, ickis.

But I like it.

Excuse me, ickis?

Ickis!

Do you think a monster

Would be any less of a monster

If he, say, looked like...
A game show host?

Game show what?

I can't.

I-it's just that...

Oh, never mind.

Scaring, ickis

Is all that matters to me.

And it should be
all that matters to you...

Allof you.

Anyone who feels differently
does not belong in this school.

Understood?

[ Cheering and applause]

May I be excused?

Yes.
Now?

No.

Thanks.

Ickis!

[ Ickis panting]

Plastoog!

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

Yeah?

You, you can come back

It's all right.

Nobody will
make fun of you.

I'm fine right here.

I cannot believe

You don't
miss living underground.

I belong in the monster world.

The truth is,
they just won't have me.

So I live here now.

Yeah, but-but-but-but-but,
i-i asked, it's okay.

You told them about me?

No, no, no, no, no.

See, I just wanted

To see how they'd
react if you were...

Well, you know

If someone likeyou

Came back underground.

There's no way

You're going
to get me down there.

We'll see.

Oh, and why, exactly

Are we gathering
everyone together?

There's this,
well...

I-i-i-i can't tell you.

Please, with
maggots and slime?

Both:
all right.

Thanks, I got to go.

[ Grunting]

Ahh! Perfect.

Oh, I am sure

You must be wondering
why we got you out of bed.

And so now, I shall tell you.

It's because, uh...

Krumm has
something to say.

Uh, there isn't
really anything...

[ Menacing]:
krumm.

...more exciting and romantic

Than being a mold farmer.

And I know

Because I've been there.

Now, what was it
you wanted to show me?

Oh, you can't see it
from there.

You have to stand
over here... Here.

No, no, no, no,
over here, over here.

No, no, no

Here, here, here.

Yeep!

Ickis?

Plastoog!

So, it looked like

We'd never get
the mold harvest in.

But then...

[ Thud]

But then we did.

Ickis, what did you do?

How could you?

Listen, everybody,
come here.

I want to introduce
someone.

He is a monster--

Come here--
except, well...

Hey, wait a minute.

We all look different.

And we are all
still monsters

Right?

Right?

Would any of us

Be any less
of a monster

If he looked...
Human?

[ All gasp]

[ Oohing]

Hi! I'm krumm.

Gromble:
there'd better be

A really good reason

Why none of you are in bed!

[ Gasps]

Plastoog?

Gromble?

I can't believe it.

Where have you been
all these years?

I've been living
in the human world.

Oh, how awful!

You poor monster.

Th-th... They're not scared
of me, are they?

They'd better not be.

If I've taught my class anything

It's that the way you look
doesn't matter.

It's the way you scare
that counts.

Class, this
is plastoog

A schoolmate
of mine.

You went to school
with the gromble?

He's that quiet little kid
I told you about.

The gromble, quiet?

My oldest friend!

And one of the greatest scarers
I've ever known!

Plastoog,
will you come back

And live with us?

There have been a lot of changes
in the monster world

These past years.

And I want to see them all.

I'm going to hit the sewers

Travel the monster world,
grombie.

Let them know plastoog is back!

But this place,
it'll always be my home.

Gromble:
just one question,
old friend.

Anything.

What's...
A game show host?

Oh, grombie

It's too terrible
to describe.

[ Cheering]

Suede:
just leave me alone, will you?

[ Crowd groans]