03x01 - Tia & Tamera Mowry/LL Cool J

[bunniefuu]

guys, guys, listen up.

Has anybody met amanda yet?

You mean amanda, our new cast member?

I'm afraid so.

Wait a second. What's wrong with amanda?

Well, let's just say,

she's way too happy and perky.

Oh, I hate happy and perky.

Hi, everyone. It's me, amanda!

What's up?

I just want to tell you all

how happy and perky I am

to be joining the cast of all that.

We're all gonna have such fun.

Oh, I'm sure we are.

O.k., Everybody, gather 'round.

Aw, come on, goldilocks.

Uh--look, amanda. Nothing personal,

but we don't like to gather.

Oh, lori beth, you are so funny.

Don't you forget it.

Come on, you guys. I have something for all of you.

Now for the boys,

I made you all a bunch of oatmeal and raisin cookies!

Oh, cookies!

Cookies.

And for the girls, stuffed animals.

Lori beth, I got you a bear.

And for alisa, a tiger.

You're the best.

And for katrina,

a pretty pink bunny.

Isn't he just too cute?

Way...

Too cute.

The show starts in minutes.

Oh, I see you've all met our new cast member, amanda.

Isn't she all happy and perky?

I just know she's gonna fit right in.

Oh, a bunny.

Amanda gave it to me.

I got a tiger.

Bear.

Cookies.

What wonderful gifts.

I enjoy gifts.

Oh, kevin. You didn't think I'd forget you, did you?

You got me a present?

Of course!

Give it.

I can't take too much more of her.

She makes me queasy.

Ever her cookies are too sweet.

You just don't like her because she's sweet and kindly.

You can learn a thing or two from amanda. That's what I say.

And this is for kevin!

Oh, a chair.

A very special chair for a very special stage manager.

Oh, it's so comfy. My rear feels all happy.

And you know,

I do need to relax now and then. You know.

What's this red button right here?

Gee, I don't know. Why don't you push it?

All righty.

Adios, sucker.

You launched kevin right through the roof.

You did that on purpose, didn't you?

Uh-huh.

Amanda, I just have one thing to say.

Welcome to the cast.

Captioning made possible by nickelodeon and u.s. Department of education

fresh out the box.

Stop, look, and watch.

Ready yet? Get set.

It'sall that.

♪ Oh

♪ uh-oh

♪ this is all that♪

♪ this is all that♪

♪ check it, check it

♪ now, this is just an introduction ♪

♪ before we blow your mind ♪

♪ the show is all of that ♪

♪ and yes, we do it all the time ♪

♪ so sit your booty on the floor ♪

♪ or in a chair

♪ on the ground or in the air ♪

♪ just don't go nowhere

♪ 'cause everything we do

♪ is all of that

♪ we're entertaining you

♪ we're all of that

♪ my posse and my crew

♪ is all of that

♪ so sit still

♪ 'cause we're comin' right back ♪

♪ oh

♪ uh-oh

♪ this is all that♪

♪ this is all that♪

♪ check it out

♪ oh

♪ uh-oh

♪ this is all that♪

♪ this is all that♪♪

and now, channel b presents,

live from their own kitchen,

cooking with randy and...

Uh...

Um--just randy.

Hi! I'm randy.

Now, I know some of you at home are saying to yourself,

hi, randy,

but where's mandy?

Well, we all know how much mandy loved chocolate.

Unfortunately, during a recent chocolatey-wild weekend,

mandy lost her mind and consumed pounds

of pure milk chocolate.

Last I heard, mandy was locked away

in a chocolate rehabilitation facility.

We wish her well.

But the show must go on.

So today, I will be interviewing

some possible new co-hosts.

Let's say hello to the lovely...

Sandy. Come on out here, sandy.

Hi, sandy!

Hi, randy!

I understand you would like to be my new co-host.

That's right, randy.

I just love cooking with chocolate.

Well, who doesn't?

In fact, check out this new dish I prepared

just this morning.

My goodness. What is it?

I call it randy's chocolate tree trunk.

Eat with me, woman!

Mmmm! It's wonderful! How do you make it?

Easy.

You just take a giant chocolate log,

roll it in chocolate flakes,

and then deep-fry it in chocolate fat!

Hey, randy, would you like to see

the new dish I prepared for you?

Why yes, I would, sandy.

I call this sponge cake a la sandy.

I see.

Sponge cake a la sandy.

Uh-huh.

Um...

Not to be rude, but uh...

Where is the chocolate?

Right here. See?

There's a little dollop of chocolate.

A--a--a dollop? That's it?

Yeah.

I think your cake could use a little something extra.

Like what?

Hmmm...

[Alarm goes off]

what the...

Emergency!

What's going on?

Chocolate's going on.

What are you doing?

Hush! This is a chocolate emergency.

Mm-hmm!

Now that's better.

But you just sprayed chocolate all over it.

Anybody can do that.

Then why didn't you?

See ya, dollop.

Sorry about that, folks.

Now, our next girl auditioning is...

Tandy.

Come on out here, tandy.

[Humming]

um...

H-how's it going, tandy?

How do you do, rr-randy?

Ha ha!

Um--tandy...

Yes, randy.

Are you on some kind of medication?

Medication?

No, silly. Why do you ask?

No reason.

I understand you've written

your very own cookbook.

That's correct, randy.

It's called...

Vegetables 'n such.

Vegetables 'n such.

No, seriously, what's the cookbook called?

Oh, randy, I am quite serious.

What about the chocolate?

Chocolate? Randy, once you've tasted

the magical freshness of carrots,

asparagus, broccoli, and green beans,

you'll find that you won't even want to eat

that nasty, silly chocolate anymore.

[Gasping]

randy, what's wrong?

Asthma!

Asthma?

Asthma att*ck.

Give me my chocolate breathalyzer.

Is chocolate good for asthma?

I have no idea.

Anyway, back to vegetables.

Mmm. Here we have a lovely organic celery stalk.

Mmmm.

Now, randy, I think you know what to do with this.

Oh, I sure do, tandy.

Get on out of my kitchen!

Get out!

Get on out of here with these vegetables and such!

I don't need no vegetables!

You're my only friend.

You know that?

Well, we're out of time, folks.

I'll find a new co-host later.

All right?

So until next time,

see ya!

You have a good time now!

And now, lori beth denburg

with more vital information for your everyday life.

If you're on a first date,

it's a bad idea to say,

"so, what's the biggest loogy you've ever hocked up?"

Oh, macarena, macarena, macarena.

Oh, macarena, macarena, macarena.

Oh, I hate the macarena!

It's not nice to push your friend billy off the roof

and then yell,

"look, neighbors, it's rainin' billy!"

This has been lori beth denburg

with vital information.

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ this is all that ♪

[banging]

[singing raucously]

hey!

What?

I'd like some food.

Me, too.

I can't believe you just took another bite.

Can I please order?

Welcome to good burger, home of the good burger.

Can I take your order?

Eeuw!

You just got good burger bits all over my face!

Uh...

No?

Yes, you did!

You got some in my mouth!

That'll be bucks!

What?!

I'm not paying you for your regurgitated burger bits!

Then I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.

That does it!

I'm reporting you to the better burger bureau!

Oh, thanks! Ha ha ha!

Weirdo!

Hey, look, I ordered a soda half an hour ago.

How long does a guy have to wait for a soda around here, huh?

Wait, wait, whoa.

I know this one.

How long does a guy have to wait

around for his order? Right, I know this!

Wait, wait.

Look, nut, just give me my soda, o.k.?

All right. Don't get your pants in a festival.

Pants? What?

There you go.

Oh, for the love of disappointment!

Look, I ordered an orange soda.

Look in here. This is not an orange soda.

All right, no problem.

There you go. Now it's all orangey.

Oh, that does it. That's the last straw.

Uh-uh. We have all kinds of straws: pretty ones, nice ones--

hey!

Hey, what's up?

Hi.

Welcome to good burger, home of the good burger.

Can I take your order?

Aw, yeah. Um... I would like one good burger,

one-- whoa!

Whoa!!

There's of you!

Uh...

Yeah.

We're twins.

But you're--

you're twice!

Yeah, that's right.

Now you're all blurry!

Uh...that's because you just rubbed your eyes.

Yeah. Can we just give you our order?

We're hungry.we're hungry.

How did you do that?

Do what?

Double yourself!

Are you an experiment?

No! We're not an experiment!

We're sisters! Twins!

How do you know which one of you is the one you are?

Is there something wrong with you?

I have toes.

Look, look, look, look...

We just wanna eat.

You wanna eat my toes?!

No, we don't wanna eat your toes!

Can we please just order a good burger?

Oh! O.k.

God!

Ooh!

Hey, guess how many toes I have.

[Groans] ! Toes!

Ha ha! Toes. Want any fries with that?

Forget it!

Keep your fries and keep your toes.

We're leaving!

Yeah, let's get outta here!

Bye! Come again!

Bye! Come again!

Ha! I did it twice!

And now,all that presents a semi-educational moment:

everyday french with pierre escargot.

Ah ha!

[Speaking french]

[speaking french]

hey! Eew!

Oh!

Ah!

[Speaking french]

♪ this is all that ♪

come on, baby.

Come on, pop for daddy!

Come on!

Well, hello there.

You must be my new student,

trudy wellburton.

Precisely. And you must be principal pimple.

Pim-pel.

My name is principal william baynes

pimpel!

Now, trudy, I would like to welcome you

to dullmont jr. High school's gifted student program

for extremely intelligent students.

Even though I am the school's principal--

principal william baynes pimpel--

I teach the gifted class,

as I enjoy personally cultivating

our school's most intelligent minds.

Well, I am ecstatic to be joining a gifted class

taught by someone of your unparalleled caliber.

Oh! Ha! Unparalleled cal--

oh, you made my pimple happy!

Oh, you are such a precocious

yet freakishly adorable little thing.

Now, trudy, I must warn you

that this class holds dullmont's smartest and brightest students.

Do not expect to be able to keep up

with these nimble-minded youngsters.

You brought the book bag there. All right.

Why's it so dark in here?

I'll turn on the lights.

Oh! [Class gasps]

what happened?

I can see!

Guys, I just turned on the lights here, see?

Oh! [Gasps]

now it's all dark again!

Oh! Oh!

Lookit! Now it's all light again!

Oh, I get it!

When she flips the thingy up, it gets sunny inside!

And when she pulls the thingy down, sun go away!

Yay!

You see how quickly these gifted children catch on?

You see, here at dullmont jr. High school,

the quest for knowledge is eternal.

You understand?

Good morning, students.

All right.

Today I would like to introduce to you

a new fine, young girl that'll be joining us in the gifted class.

Say hello to little trudy wellburton.

Potato. Potato. Potato.

[Louder] potato!

Sure. Hi.

Uh, principal pimpel,

are you sure this is the giftedclass

for intelligentstudents?

Ha ha ha!

Now, now, now, class,

trudy may not be as smart as the rest of you,

but let's not poke fun at the little lamb, all right?

You go on and sit down in the little desk chair.

Now, did everybody here read chapter ?

Principal pimpel,

these books you gave us are weird!

Yeah, no pictures.

They're just full of these pages with little black squiggles.

No, no, no.

See? You got it upside down.

Now, these little black squiggles

are symbols called letters.

Now together, these letters

form visual representations of words.

Like for example, let me see..

Coconut.

Coconut is a word.

Can anybody say coconut?

[Mouthing word]

c--

c--

c--

scissors!

Coconut is too difficult a word for y'all youngsters to say.

Coconut? What's wrong with you people?

Coconut, coconut, coconut!

Excellent.

Excellent. Excellent.

Well, trudy, you might catch up with

the rest of the class sooner than I had hoped.

C--

c--

c--

wheel!

Now, now, students,

who here can name all of the numbers

between and ?

Ooh! Jupiter!

No. But that was a gifted response,

despite the fact that it has nothing to do with mathematics

in any way.

Jupiter!

Shh!

Now listen carefully, children.

I'll start you off. ...

...

...

, , , , , , !

Great german meatballs, trudy!

How did you know all those numbers?

Gee, I dunno.

Maybe because I went to kindergarten?

Oh, now, now, trudy.

No need to show off.

But principal pimpel,

how did small girl learn all the numbers?

A witch!

A witch, I tell ya!

[Chanting] witch! Witch! Witch!

Now, now, now, class!

We will seek knowledge in a clean and orderly fashion.

[Bell rings]

[screaming]

that was just the bell.

It means that class is over.

So just relax and exit the room.

I'll see y'all tomorrow.

Boy, I got a gifted bunch this year.

Aah!

Hey, clavis! Wake up.

The show's over.

Oh, yeah. Kick it!