03x02 - Montell Jordan

[bunniefuu]

Oh!

Go, kenan.

Wow!

O.k. My turn.

Kenan: guys,

I have a great idea for a joke

We can play on kevin.

Tell me, man.

When he comes in yelling, " minutes! Minutes"...

Excuse me, cast members.

The show will be starting in just a moment,

So please get ready. Thank you.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Yes? Is there a problem?

Yeah, where's kevin?

Who are you?

Kevin? Kevin...

Oh, you mean your old stage manager.

Old? Kevin?

What do you mean, old?

Well, it's really not my place to say, but...

Kevin's been fired. He's gone.

I'm ronald, your new stage manager.

What do you mean, he's gone?

Wait a minute, man. Where's kevin?!

I'm afraid he's already found employment elsewhere.

Now, please get ready for the show.

You have, uh...

A limited amount of time.

Oh, really? How much time?

Minutes! Minutes!

Just hurry. Thank you.

Just hurry. Thank you.

I want kevin back.

We all do.

But that guy said kevin's already found another job.

Well, we gotta find him. Come on.

Let's go.

Yo, kev-in! Where you at?

Minutes. You've got minutes to finish.

Minutes!

Zip it up!

[Zip]

[Toilet flushes]

Hi. I'm kevin, the men's room attendant.

Congratulations.

Uh, can I help you use the men's room?

No, I'm done.

I'll get you some soap, a sponge, cologne,

A beverage.

Nothing.

Uh, I grew up in cleveland.

Great.

Oh!

Bye.

Come back again if you get the urge.

Oh, a nickel!

Cents.

Cents.

Kevin!

Oh, there you are!

We found you!

Kids...what are you doing here?

We came to see you.

We missed you.yeah!

A lot.

Nice men's room!

You really miss me?

Of course, kev. We can't do all that without you.

You're coming back with us.

Wait. I can't. The producer fired me,

Said I was too annoying.

We know.

Shh! Shh!

We took care of it, man.

We told him if you leave the show,

We leave the show.

So you're back in. Now let's go.

You mean it? You kids aren't tugging my tuba?

Tug--your--tube-- no!

No!

No!

Oh! I'll be right with you.

Uh, kevin, how long you going to be in there?

Minutes. Just minutes.

Captioning made possible by nickelodeon and u.s. Department of education

Fresh out the box.

Stop, look, and watch.

Ready yet? Get set.

It'sall that.

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪

♪ Check it, check it

♪ Now, this is just an introduction ♪

♪ Before we blow your mind ♪

♪ The show is all of that ♪

♪ And yes, we do it all the time ♪

♪ So sit your booty on the floor ♪

♪ Or in a chair

♪ On the ground or in the air ♪

♪ Just don't go nowhere

♪ 'Cause everything we do

♪ Is all of that

♪ We're entertaining you

♪ We're all of that

♪ My posse and my crew

♪ It's all of that

♪ So sit still

♪ 'Cause we're comin' right back ♪

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪

♪ Check it out

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪♪

It's time for...

It was so nice of you to come grocery shopping

With me, mark.

Sure, penny. Wow...your hair looks swell.

You look like a fairy princess.

Well, I do mousse.

Did you hear that?

Your hair looks swell, penny!

Like a fairy princess!

Let's go bully those guys over there.

Yeah! We'll harass them for no good reason.

It'll be fun!

Yeah, then we'll feel better about ourselves! Come on.

Hey, look, mark! It's the dairy section!

Can't we just move on to lunch meats?

Hey, look! Yogurt! Don'tcha just love yogurt?

Actually, I prefer fruits.

Well, if it isn't swell little mark.

Oop!

And his little friend, penny lane.

Quit it!

Yeah, you leave penny be, mister.

You touched me?

E-excuse me. You don't touch bullies.

Now you're gonna get it!

No! I--i don't wanna get it!

Ow!

Now you're in a grocery cart.

Where you don't want to be.

Well, what are you big, bad bullies gonna do to me now?

You're not gonna push him

Into that display of tomatoes, are you?

Eh--ack--shh!

Now there's an idea!

Thanks a lot, penny.

Excuse me, miss lane.

Have a swell trip, mark.

What's up now, mark?

What's up now?

Ha ha ha!

Yeah!

Now I'm humiliated.

Mark, please do something!

Uh...

I have to use the little girls' room.

Hey, we sure took care of him, didn't we?

Boy, you hit him good. Ah, yeah.

Hey, let's call penny names until she cries!

[Cra-aa-ck]

He's concerned!

It's romaine!

It's superdude!

That's right.

I'm...superdude!

The teenaged superhero with powers that make women sweat.

It's true!

See? I can fly first-class,

I can fall down and not get hurt.

I can also kick balls real high in the air.

I also enjoy finger-painting

And examining bunnies

And dressing up and pretending.

Ah!

We gotta go!

Let's run like cowards!

Stop them, superdude!

Tomatoes to go!

Aah!

Aah!

Let's hear it for superdude!

Yay! Yay!

Superdude!

Yogurt delivery.

Wow!

That's the biggest tub of yogurt

I've ever seen!

Who are you?

I'm yogurl...

Queen of acedophilis!

Uh-huh. That's right.

Don't come near me, yogurl!

Oh, now don't be shy, supercutie.

You know you want some of my good yogurty hugging,

So come on over here and get some of my fruit at the bottom!

No! Don't harm me!

Why doesn't superdude do something?

I tell you why! 'Cause he all lactose intolerant.

That's what it is.

Lactose what?

Intolerant.

Lactose intolerant.

It means that superdude is harmed by dairy products.

Like...ham?

No. Ham is meat. Dairy products contain milk--

Items like butter, cream, cheese,

Cream cheese, and...

Yogurt!

Get ready for a yogurty treat, superdude.

Wait. Why do you want to harm me, yogurl?

Well, because I'm evil, and I'm made of milk,

And you a super hero who happens to be harmed by milk.

So it just seems like the right thing to do.

Now get some of this milky goodness, baby!

Aah!

Superdude: aah!

Somebody help superdude!

I've got a moist towelette!

Aah! Aah!

Thank you for de-yogurting me, little girl.

Glad to do it.

You're the best, superdude,

Even if you are lactose intolerant.

Oh...

[Whispers] yeah!

Now as for you, yogurl...

Why you fighting, superdude?

You ain't gonna do nothing!

Oh, really?

Well, try this on for size.

Oh! Oh!

Oh, you stink!

Oh, your breath! Somebody give him a mint!

Oh, it hurts!

Somebody--somebody got to stop him!

Oh! Ow!

Oh!

[Coughs]

You froze her!

That's right.

Yogurl is now frozen yogurl.

Sounds delicious!

What should we do with her now, superdude?

Add your favorite toppings and dig in!

[Cheering]

Wow! Yogurl should have never

Messed with you, superdude!

Yes. She should have known she'd...

Get licked!

Hah hah hah hah hah!

Hah hah hah hah hah!

And now, lori beth denberg with more vital information

For your everyday life.

It's rude to talk with your mouth full.

It's even ruder to blow your nose in your sister's pants.

Don't go to your friend's house for dinner

If his mother is serving nancy pot pie.

You'll seem peculiar if you go up to your principal

And say, "hey, how's your butt?"

This has been lori beth denberg with vital information.

♪ This is all that♪

♪ This is all that♪♪

Houston, this is commander feeble

From the space shuttle inferior.

Go, feeble.

Yes. We are now conducting a space walk.

Captain snivel is outside the space shuttle right now.

Status report.

Space walk is going perfectly.

No malfunctions.

Malfunction!

Help!

Uh, houston, we'll call you back!

Captain, what's wrong?!

The hatch is stuck!

I can't get back in the shuttle!

Uh...

Can't breathe. Runnin' out of air.

The hatch is stuck!

What are we going to do?

I don't know!

[Falling sound]

What the--

What was that?

That was me!

I'm...

Repairman-man-man!

You're a repairman?

I'm the repairman. I can repair anything and everything!

Can you repair the giant hole

You just made in our shuttle?

Yeah!

No!

Now something tells me that your space hatch is a wee bit stuck!

How do you know that?

Never you mind. I have a space hatch to repair,

And repair it, I will. Now stand back and cover your goodies.

Sir, that's very dangerous.

Very dangerous!

Please don't!

Incoming!

[Boom]

[Cough cough][cough cough]

See there?

That hatch won't be giving you a quack of trouble anymore.

There is no more hatch!

You blew it to smithereens!

Don't thank me!

Don't worry!

Oh!

Oh!

Air! Sweet air!

Captain, are you o.k.?

Oh, yeah, I'm all right.

Thanks a lot.

Who are you?

Why, I'm...

Repairman-man-man- man-man!

What's with the echo?

Echo schmecko!

Now stand aside while I fix your jet pack.

Jet pack?

This is a top of the line...

No, repairman!

Here comes the pitch!

Aah!

Whoa, I repaired it!

You repaired nothing!

You've k*lled captain snivel!

It was easy!

What?!

You're everything a repairman shouldn't be!

Thank you!

Houston control to u.s.s. Inferior.

Commander feeble, do you read me?

Yes. Yes, I read you.

Uh-oh. That red light is blinking.

I can repair that.

No! The red light's supposed to blink.

Blinking is good. Please do not repair it.

Please, I'm begging you!

Let's get out of here before he repairs us all!

[Crazy laughter]

Tune in next time for the continuing adventures of...

Repairman-man-man-man-man!

♪ This is all that♪♪

All that presents

A semi-educational moment:

Everyday french with pierre escargot.

Ho ho ho!

[Speaking french]

Beep beep.

Oh, no! [Speaking french]

[Speaking french]

,.

,.

,.

And that's my penny collection.

I wasn't sleeping! I wasn't sleeping!

You get an "a"

Because your presentation made a lot of...sense!

Our next show and teller is robert.

Big rob! Arr! Arr! Arr!

Whoo!

Hi. Today I would like to share with you

My chicken pox.

Now, the chicken pox are highly, highly contagious.

In fact, I'm not even really supposed to be at school today.

Here, feel them.

What's contagious mean?

Contagious means that if you were

To get anywhere near someone who has the chicken pox,

You're gonna catch 'em.

Oh, man!

Now, I'm touching sara's face.

She might get the chicken pox. She might not.

Chances are, she will.

Hey, what's the big idea?

Yeah! Get away!

Now, class!

"Sh" spells shh!

Robert.

Having the chicken pox is not fun.

Your eyes get all watery,

And your head starts to hurt.

And the worst part is definitely the itching.

Oh, does it itch!

I don't even want to tell you about the itching.

Do I need to even mention the spots?

Right now I have a fever about...

.

I'm feeling very hot and uncomfortable.

Let's compare your temperature with mine.

Eew! This was just in your mouth!

Now joan, don't whine!

Let's give robert the same courtesy that you'd want.

All he's giving me is a disease!

I'm infected!

Sara.

How long do these chicken pox last?

Um...about weeks.

Ah, man! But our -week vacation starts tomorrow.

Um. I guess that's the end of my presentation.

I'm not feeling too good, you know.

I do have the chicken pox.

Well, robert, thank you for spreading your disease knowledge

To the whole class.

You get an "a".

All right, class. Our next show and teller is sara hoopshire.

Hi.

For my show and tell project today, I brought...

A lead pipe!

See, it's a pipe, and it's made of lead.

And it hurts a lot when you hit people with it like this...

Ow! Ow!

Ow!

Ow! It does hurt.

Ow! It's true!

It hurts!

Ow!

Ouch!

Hey, clavis! Wake up.

The show's over.

Oh, yeah. Kick it!