04x02 - Busta Rhymes

[bunniefuu]

So I said to her, "hey, if you don't like ham juice,

Then what on earth are you doing

At the pork festival?

Well. Anyway, thanks for listening, you big ear of corn.

Hey, guys, don't you think we should start the show?

Kevin did say minutes, oh, uh... Minutes ago.

O.k., Well, we better go start the show. Time for comedy.

Nobody move, o.k.? Don't do the show!

Why not? What's wrong?

Is elvis still dead?

Yeah, but that's not the problem.

See, the problem is i...

I can't find my toothbrush.

So?

Are we supposed to care?

You guys don't understand.

Kenan never starts the show

Without brushing his teeth first.

That's right, kel.

I'm known for my pretty white toothy smile.

I can't go out there with my teeth like this. I feel so dirty.

Then why don't you use my toothbrush?

[Stuttering]

No, filthy!

I don't know where your mouth's been.

The show's about to start.

Well, show or no show, junior,

I'm not going out there

Without having my teeth properly cleansed.

Oh, come on, kenan.

All right, all right, all right!

Let's not ad-lib argue.

If kenan can't find his toothbrush,

I'm sure we can think of another way to get his teeth clean.

Well, I do keep this old toilet brush thing in my back pocket.

Old toilet brush?

What you talking about there, new cast member?

Hold him!

Wait a minute, now! You ain't got...

Open his face.

Wait a minute! I'm the veteran!

I'm the veteran![Scraping]

Aaaggggghhhhh!

Well?

My teeth just aren't clean yet. I'm sorry.

I know what to do. Mop!

Got his arms?

Aaaaaggggghhhhh!

That's nasty!

I'm sorry. While that did feel interesting,

They're just not clean.

Wait, wait, wait. I got an idea. Excuse me, guys.

Oh, the high-powered fire hose we keep in the hallway.

Oh, yeah. Great idea, josh.

Wait a minute.

That's a high-pressured fire hose, now, man!

Open wide!

The teeth are clean!

[Cheering]

Hey, now. You're all supposed to be onstage.

Don't make me tell you twice.

Um...guys, should i?

It seems so right.

Captioning made possible by nickelodeon and u.s. Department of education

Fresh out the box.

Stop, look, and watch.

Ready yet? Get set.

It's all that.

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ Check it, check it

♪ Now, this is just an introduction ♪

♪ Before we blow your mind ♪

♪ The show is all of that ♪

♪ And yes, we do it all the time ♪

♪ So sit your booty on the floor ♪

♪ Or in a chair

♪ On the ground or in the air ♪

♪ Just don't go nowhere

♪ 'Cause everything we do

♪ Is all of that

♪ We're entertaining you

♪ We're all of that

♪ My posse and my crew

♪ Is all of that

♪ So sit still

♪ 'Cause we're comin' right back ♪

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ Check it out

♪ Oh

♪ Uh-oh

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ This is all that ♪♪

Can you believe adam barker

Sat next to me during english class?

You are, like, so lucky.

Yeah-huh. Did he say anything to you?

What? Tell me, tell me, tell me.

O.k. He leaned over to me,

Got right next to my ear and said,

"Hey, do you know what time it is?"

No!i swear!

Do you think he's gonna, like, ask you out?

I don't know, but if he does, I'll di--

What?

There's no water. This faucet is broken.

[Object dropping]

Do you hear something?

Uh-huh. And I wonder what it could--

[Crash]

Aaaaggggghhhhh!

What was that?

Oh, oh, oh!

That was me!

I'm repairman-man- man-man!

You're a repairman?!

I'm the repairman.

I can repairman anything, everything,

And other stuff, too!

Excuse me. You're in the girls' bathroom!

Both: hello!

Hello!

Now, a little buddy bird tells me

That you're having a wee bit trouble

With that faucet over there.

Yeah. I turned it, but no water came out.

Step aside!

Why?

Because I'm repairman...

Man-man-man!

What's with the echo?

Echo, my butt!

Now, there's a faucet

That needs to be repaired,

And repair it shall I will.

What?

Let me see. Now, just a little problem right there, I believe.

Let me just test it right there.

Aaggggghhhhhhhhh!

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!

No more broken faucet.

You mean no more faucet, period!

You're welcome.

Who thanked you?

Your grandmother.

No, she didn't!

Hush.

Oh, rotten purse! Open, open!

What's wrong, miss fingerly?

The snap latch on my pocketbook is stuck!

Stuck latch! I can fix that!

It'll only take a second.

I used to work in a department store.

I think there's something wrong with it.

Aaaagggghhhhhhhhhh!

Oh, oh, oh, oh!

[Toilet flushes]

There! That purse won't be troubling you anymore.

Of course it won't. You flushed it bye-bye.

It was easy!

Miss fingerly, come quick!

There's a light switch that's broken in the boys' bathroom!

Young man, you're in the girlie restroom,

And you're a boy-ie!

But who's gonna fix the light switch in the boys' bathroom, miss fingerly?

That'll be me!

[Thud]

My nose! You broke my nose bone!

Broken nose bone! I can repair that!

Oh, oh, oh!

Come here.

Now, where's the little boy's room?

Over there, yonder!

Over there, yonder?

I'm repairman man-man-man!

Oh! Oh!

Aaaaggggghhhhhh!

Boy, I'm pretty!

Tune in next time for the continuing adventures of...

Repairman man-man-man!

And now lori beth denberg with more vital information

For your everyday life.

If you don't have something nice to say to someone,

Then make sure you have something heavy to throw.

It is better to sit there and look stupid

Than it is to stand up, open your mouth, and announce,

"Hey, I'm definitely stupid!"

If you're on time, that's good.

If you're on fire, try yelling

Aaaaaaagggggggghhhhhhhh!

This has been lori beth denberg with vital information.

♪ This is all that ♪

♪ This is all that ♪♪

Hey, everybody! It's time for the game show...

And now, here's your lovely hostess,

Winter wonders.

Hi, people. I'm winter wonders,

And this is the game show called what do you do?

Where a panel tries to figure out

What some kid does.

Now let's meet our panel

From dullmont junior high school.

Principal pimpell.

Miss fingerly.

Coach kreeton.

Daah!

And, uh, kevin? You're not from

Dullmont junior high.

I'm not wearing any pants.

Oh, why does coach kreeton

Have to sit next to kevin, huh?

Oh, that's nasty! That's just nasty!

What's coach kreeton gonna do?

What's coach kreeton gonna do?

Oh, oh, oh, oh!

O.k. Let's bring out our first contestant, kalie lymph.

Hi, winter wonders.

O.k. Now, remember, kalie,

If any of the panelists

Cannot guess what you do,

You win barbara's new fresno dream hut.

Wow, I'd love to have that hut.

Yeah, wouldn't you just?

Now let's tell the audience at home what kalie does.

O.k. The first guess is principal pimpell.

Principal william baines pimpell.

Now, kalie, as principal

Of dullmont junior high school,

Let me ask you this question.

Does what you do have anything to do

With the nasty, bulbous pimple

On my forehead?

Uh, no.

[Buzzer]

My turn, my turn!

Daah!

Kalie, does what you do have anything to do

With the nasty, bulbous pimple

On principal pimpell's forehead?

I said no.

[Buzzer]

Now, miss fingerly, if you had listened,

You would know that I had already posed that question

Prior to what you said.

Why won't that pop?

Coach kreeton, your guess.

Oh, yeah!

All right, now, now. Now, let me get this straight.

Now, if coach kreeton guesses what kalie kalie does,

Then little kalie kalie doesn't get the pink, pretty dollhouse.

That's right.

Heh heh heh heh heh heh.

Good.

All right, now, kalie!

Do what you do

Have anything to do

With my sad, miserable life?

No.

[Buzzer]

Aaaaggggghhhhh!

Your guess, kevin.

No, no, no, no! Let me go again! Let me go again!

Before I cr*ck his neck

Like it was some kind of twig branch.

I'll do it, I'll do it!

I pass to coach kreeton.

Good!

Now, kalie...

Do you lick lobsters?

[Bell dinging]

Correct.

Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!

Coach kreeton wins! I win!

Oh, yeah, and the feeling's good.

How does it feel to be a loser

Like coach kreeton?

Be a loser. Now you're a loser!

Ha ha ha!

But I wanted to win barbara's fresno dream hut.

Sorry.

Oh, no more dolly hut, no more dolly hut!

Why don't you hut? Hut, hut, hut, hut.

Get going! Don't wanna see you no more!

Oh, yeah! Bring on the next contestant.

O.k. Our next contestant is billy fouco.

I'm billy fouco!

O.k. Let's tell the audience at home what billy does.

O.k. Now, remember, panel, if you guess anything wrong,

Something horrible will happen to you.

Principal pimpell?

Principal william baines pimpell.

All right, now, billy.

Why don't you go ahead and tell me what you do

So I won't have to guess?

No!

[Buzzer]

Whoops. Wrong, principal pimpell.

Bring out the fettucini alfredo.

That boy got hot fettucini on my pimple.

That's too bad.

Miss fingerly, your guess.

Hmm. Billy fouco, does what you do

Have anything to do with...

Stains?

Uh, no.

[Buzzer]

Sorry, miss fingerly. Bring out the fish.

Fish? Why I love fish. In fact, i...

Ooh, I've been fish slapped!

Coach kreeton, your guess.

Oh, yeah! All right, wonder.

All right, billy.

Does what you do start with the letter "nah"?

No.[Buzzer]

Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute, billy.

Too bad, coach kreeton.

Drop the bowling balls.

Drop the who? Drop the bowling balls?

Tune in next time for what to you do?

Bye-bye.

Bye.

♪ This is all that ♪♪

Man, am I glad school's out.

Me, too. Let's watch some tv.

Tv. Right. I'll turn it on.

Aaaaggggghhhhhhh!

What?

Our tv! It's been stolen!

And look! The stereo's been stolen, too!

And our couch.

Quick, call the police!

Right, the police!

Hello?

Hello, police? Right. We've been robbed.

How fast can you get a cop over here?

[Knock at door] police!

Thanks.

I'll get it!

[Crashing]

It's....

Jack campbell, fat cop.

What seems to be the trouble here?

Look, right here. We've been robbed! See?

Our tv, our stereo, and our couch!

That's just awful!

I better check the refrigerator.

The refrigerator?

[Crashing]

Ah! There it is!

Thank heaven those animals didn't steal this refrigerator.

Officer campbell, that's fine.

What about all our stolen stuff?

Good meat loaf.

Please! You can have the meat loaf later.

Please help us.

O.k. Let's, uh...

Let's go investigate.

Follow me.

[Groans]

Look. See? Our tv, it's been stolen. It's gone.

Uh-huh. And, uh...

[Inhaling]

When did you first notice your tv was missing?

When we got home from school.

And, uh...when you were at school today,

What did you have for lunch?

We had--we had turkey.

Yeah, that's it, turkey.

Was the, uh... Was the turkey good?

Yeah, sure, it was fine, but...

What about our stolen stuff, officer campbell?!

But what came with the turkey, huh?

Mashed potatoes, gravy, corn,

Macaroni and cheese?

But what difference does it make?

Answer the question!

Mashed potatoes, o.k.?

We had turkey and mashed potatoes.

Gravy?

Yes!

Mmm.

That sounds just, uh, wonderful, just...

Is something the matter?

Turkey... Mashed potatoes...

Gravy...that's...

What did you have for dessert?

Look what you did to our chair!

That's o.k. I'll, uh... I'll call someone to fix it.

Excuse me, fat cop, fat cop coming through.

Police business!

Hello? Yeah, this is jack campbell, fat cop.

O.k. Yeah, listen. I would like to order buckets

Of fried chicken, extra greasy,

And a pound and a half of mashed potatoes, extra gravy,

And, yeah, why not? Yeah, a glass of butter.

Hey!

Oh, I'm sorry. Did you want something?

We want you to help find our stolen stuff.

O.k. Yeah.

Now, um, uh...

Excuse me.

[Inhaling]

What was stolen again?

We told you!

They took our tv, our stereo, and our couch!

[Bird twittering]

Well, at least they didn't steal your little birdie.

It'd be terrible if they stole twiffles.

Yeah.

I, uh, I just better check twiffles for,

You know, uh, fingerprints, yeah.

Cute little birdie.

[Chewing]

You ate twiffles!

I did not!

Yes, you did! Look at your mouth!

It's got feathers all over it!

He flew away!

He flew nowhere!

You ate and are now digesting our bird!

Do you have any pie?

No! No pie! No chicken, no meat loaf!

Yeah, yeah. We don't mind that you're enormous,

But would you please help us find our stolen stuff?

O.k., O.k., O.k., O.k. I'll, uh, I'll check upstairs.

Upstairs? Why look upstairs?

There could be some ham upstairs.

There's no ham upstairs.

What's he doing?

I don't know.

Officer campbell,

I don't know why you're upstairs. [Floor creaking]

There's no ham up there.

[Gasp]

[Crashing]

I'm jack campbell, fat cop.

Vis! Wake up.

The show's over.

Oh, yeah. Kick it!