04x05 - Three Girls, a Guy and a Cineplex

[bunniefuu]

Oh, here it goes.

♪ Everybody out there
go run and tell ♪

♪ Your homeboys
and homegirls ♪

♪ It's time for
kenan and kel ♪

♪ They'll keep you laughing
in the afternoon ♪

♪ So don't touch that dial,
don't leave the room ♪

♪ Because they're always
into some more fun ♪

♪ And you don't
want to miss it ♪

♪ It's double k
like two the good way ♪

♪ Kenan and kel, or should
I say kel and kenan? ♪

♪ Then you gotta
watch kenan ♪

♪ 'Cause kenan be scheming
with a plan or a plot ♪

♪ To make it to the top ♪

♪ But they're kinda
in the middle ♪

♪ 'Cause they're
always gettin' caught ♪

♪ This ain't the hardy boys
or nancy drew mystery ♪

♪ It's just kenan and kel
in your vicinity ♪

♪ Like sigfried and roy
or abbott and costello ♪

♪ Magic and kareem
or penn and teller ♪

♪ Somebody's in trouble?
Oh, here it go ♪

♪ On nick nick nick nick
nick nick nick nick ♪♪

Thank you very much.

Welcome to
the kenan & kel
program.

In denmark,
they call me kenan.

[Cheers and applause]

In mars they
call me larry,

But sometimes I like
to be called kel.

[Cheers and applause]

Thank you. We've got
one humdinger of a show
for y'all tonight.

I mean, we've got
action, drama, suspense,

And, of course,
lots and lots
of the comedy.

Well, you know, kenan,
instead of the comedy,

I thought I'd entertain
the people by juggling.

I didn't know
you could juggle.

Yeah, check it out. Watch.

[Drum roll]

[Cheers and applause]

Huh? Huh?

Ah, that was pretty
not good, kel,

But if you all wanna
see some juggling,

Why don't you watch
tonight's show.

Come on, velma!

Kenan! Kenan!
But you have to stay.

I haven't finished
my act yet.

Next I was gonna juggle
flaming snowballs.

Kenan? Awwww,
here it goes!

This was when betty
got kicked in the head
by the horse.

Oooh, that must
have hurt!

A little.

So, caitlin, did
you enjoy the trip?

Whatever.

Oh, caitlin's
been down
a little lately.

Her boyfriend
just broke up
with her.

Mom!

Well, don't worry, sweetie.
There are plenty of

Mature, sensitive,
intelligent young men
out there.

No way, kel. You cannot
stick an entire sausage
up your nose.

Uh-huh.

Kenan, you remember
the nimmers.

What's up, nimmers?

Nim-mer-r-r-r-r-rs!

Oh, the nimmers. I'm
so glad to see you again.

Oh, I thought I'd
never see you again.

Oh, nimmers! Oh!

This is the happiest
day of my life.

Have we met?

No.

Hey, caitlin. How's
that boyfriend of yours?

My boyfriend?

Yeah, I mean,
he was pretty cool.

Y'all looked like
you were perfect
for each other.

Mr. Rockmore?
Wh-what's wrong?

Are you chokin'?
Oh, I'll save ya!

I'll save ya!
Ahhh! Ahhh!

Kel! Kel!

I wasn't choking. I was
just trying to tell kenan

That caitlin's
boyfriend dumped her.

He dumped you?

Yeah, kenan,
you know. Dumped her.

Just broke her heart.

Here's her heart
right here--
thump thump--

All on the ground!

Just stomped all
over her heart.

Stomped all over
her heart.

Went wrasslin'
with her heart.

Went wrasslin'
on her heart.

On her heart!

Oh, poor baby!

You ain't got
a man no more!

Uh...don't mind him.
He's insane.

Kenan, you wanna
give me a hand?

Sure, pop.

I meant with the dishes.

Ah, right. My bad.

Very funny.
Very, very funny.

Here--here, roger.
I'll give you a hand.

Thanks, lou.

So, uh, caitlin.

Why'd you get dumped?

I mean, like,
what's wrong with you?

Kel, that's rude!
Nothing's wrong
with her.

Oh, wait,
I found out.
I see it.

Boy, you got some
big, ugly feet.

Whoo!

Don't mind him.
Your feet are just fine.

They're the cutest
feet I've ever seen.

Thanks, kenan. You've
got nice feet, too.

Well, watch out!

You know, caitlin doesn't
have any plans this weekend.

Of course she doesn't
have any plans.

She just got dumped.
Pay attention.

Mom, I don't need you
to set me up on a date.yes, you do.

Well, actually, caitlin,
if you wanna hang out
or something--

Caitlin's free
saturday.

Well, so is kenan.
How about a movie?

How about at :?ooh, it's a date.

Ah--ah--whoa,
excuse me.

Mama, mrs. Nimmer,
I can take care of it
myself, thank you.

Caitlin, would you
like to go see a movie
saturday night?

Yeah, I'd love to.
That'd be great.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Our little baby kenan
is grown up!

And little nimmer, too.
Little nimmer, too.

All right,
that'll be a tomato,

One bag of pretzels,
and one meat in a box.

Hey, sharla. Did you do
anything fun last night?

Well, that depends.

Do you think it's
fun to stand out in
the cold all night

Waiting for your date
who never shows up

Because he's kenan
and he's a big jerk?

Ah, w-well, I think--
i-i, I better go to
the back now, bye.

Whoo. Hey,
what's up, sharla?

Hey, what's up,
sharla?

Hi...kel.

Oooooh, hey, man.
What's wrong with
sharla?

She looks
a little upset.

I don't know.
Why do you say that?

Well, I don't know.
She's making this
face like this--

Oh,yeah, she is
kinda making faces
over there.

I wonder what
she could be mad--

Our date!

Oh, man, I forgot
about our date.

Uh, hey, sharla.
Look, I know we were

Supposed to have
a date last night--

I can't believe you
stood me up, kenan.

As if I don't have
better things to do

Than stand around
all night waiting for you.

W-wait--look--

Do you know how cold
it was last night?

Man, you left her
out there in the cold?

Man--mind your business.

Look, I'm really sorry--

Sorry's not gonna
cut it, buddy.

Who are you?

Look, sharla, I'm--
give me one more chance.

Can we talk about
this in private?

Girl, don't give
him no more chances.

He ain't no good.
No good.

Kel, you're supposed
to be on my side.

Oh.

All right, fine.
I'll give you
a chance to explain.

I can't wait
to hear this one.

And it better be good.

G-g-go away.

All right, now--

Kel, this is
a private conversation.

Oh, ok, kenan.

Sharla, get out.

Man, kel! When
I say it's private,

That means you get out.oh!

And chris, you, too.

It's my office.

Please, chris!

I'm polishing
my pewter cow.

Oh, how cute.

My cow!

I'm coming,
mr. Moo cow!

All right, sharla,
we're alone now.

So, what do you have
to say for yourself?

Uh, let me see.

All right, I forgot
about our date, ok?

I don't have an excuse.

But I'm sorry.
I just forgot.

Please give me
one more chance.

I'll do whatever
you want me to.

Kel: make him
cut your toenails!

Excuse me one second.

Oh!

[Kel cries out in pain]

Now, where was i?

You were begging
for my forgiveness.

Oh, right, right, right.

I'm sorry! Oh, please,
give me one more chance!

I'll do anything.
I'll take you out
whenever you want,

Just name a day,
whenever you want.

All right, fine.
I'll give you
one more chance.

You can take me to
the movies on saturday.

Saturday, cool.
All right, sat--

Ooh, saturday. Uh...

What's wrong
with saturday?

Now, you're not trying
to get out of our date
already, are you?

No--no--no, it's just that

Out of all the days
you could have picked,

You picked saturday...
Which is a fine day for me.

Kel: kenan,
you know it's not fine.

See, on saturday,
you already made a date--

Kel!

Uh, sharla, excuse
me, I'll be right back
in a second.

You all right?
All right? Yeah?

Now what were you doing?

I was trying to tell you

You already made plans for
saturday night with caitlin.

I know that.

Then why did you make plans
with sharla the same night.

I had no choice.

Oh, man, I cannot
date girls
at the same time.

I'm just gonna have to
call caitlin and cancel.

Oh, don't worry.
I'll call her.

[Screaming]
caitlin! Caitlin!

She's not gonna
hear that.

Yes she is.
She's right there.

What is she doing here?

Go in the back and
keep sharla busy.all right.

Hey, caitlin. This
is a nice surprise.

Hi, kenan. I wanted to talk
to you about saturday night.

I hope you won't be upset,
but the thing is i--

You can't make it?
Oh, man!

[Sing-songing]
you can't make it.

Aw, darn it! Well,
I guess you gotta go,

It's just not fair.

Actually, what I
was gonna say is

That my dad won't
let me borrow his car

So you'll have to
meet me at the theater.

So, you can still go then?mm-hmm.

Oh, that's great.

Actually, since we're on
the subject of saturday,

See, I really need--

What? Are you saying
you don't wanna
go out with me?

No--no--no, I'm not
saying that, exactly,

It's just that,
what I'm saying--

It's because you don't
like me, isn't it?

I'm being dumped again!

No, not dumping,
not dumping.

Kenan, I'm done
entertaining sharla.

I thought you said
you were gonna be
right back.

N-no, ma'am, we don't
sell papayas here.

Papayas?

Papayas? Y'all
got papayas?

Oooh, I want some.

We don't sell
papayas.

My point exactly!
I'm sorry, you're gonna
have to be going now.

Ok, I'm confused.
So what were you
saying about saturday?

I was saying the papayas
won't be on sale
on saturday, either,

Because...we don't
sell 'em here!

But I can't--

Saturday.
Date. Yes. Bye.

Kenan, why are you
acting so weird?

Are we still on
for saturday?

Saturday.
Date. Yes. Bye.

It's ok, everybody.

Mr. Moo cow is safe.

[Moo-oo-oo-oo]

Hi, sharla?
Yeah, it's kenan.

Uh-huh...listen.

Instead of going
on saturday night,

Why not go on
sunday night instead?

That sounds good to you?

Perfect. All right.
I'll see you
sunday, then.

Whoo. That went well.

All right, time to
try it for real.

...--, Rigby's.

[Ring]

Rigby's.

Uh, hey--hey, sharla.
Glad I caught you at work.

You're not trying to
get out of our date
on saturday, are you?

No! No, of course not.

It's just that
I heard about this
concert on sunday night,

And I thought maybe you
would like to go to that...

On sunday.

That sounds great,
kenan. Thanks.

Really? I mean,
you mean it?

Yeah, I think it's
great that you're making
up for the other night

By taking me out
twice this weekend.

Yeah, I'll tell you--no!

Sunday is just once.

Yeah, and the date
on saturday night
makes twice.

Oh, saturday, so, that's
still happening, huh?

Yep, but I gotta
get back to work,

So I'll see you
on saturday...
And sunday.

[Sputtering]

Oh, man!

Kenan, I got the solution
to all your problems.

I doubt it,
but go ahead.

I got you another date
for saturday night.

Kel, I already
have dates.

Naw, see, it's different
because it's a double date.

I'm gonna be going, too.

How is that helping?

Well, see, you don't
have to go on a date

With sharla and
caitlin,

Because you and I are
gonna be at the movies

With wanda and yovanda.

Wanda and yovanda?
Man, what's this--

Call 'em and
tell 'em I can't go.

Aw, I'm sorry, man.
They don't have a phone.

So now I got dates
at the same time,
the same place?

Nah, look at it this way.

One date...with girls.

Why-y-y-y-y-y-y!

♪ Martians, martians ♪

♪ Martians, martians,
martians ♪

♪ Martians, martians ♪

♪ Martians, martians,
martians ♪

Hey, I can't wait to see
martians from marsin d.

How about you, kenan?

Man, ain't nobody
goin' to see no
martians from
marsin d.

Yeah, well what about
yovanda and wanda?

Kel, I already
have dates.

Man, I'm taking
sharla to see
neverending teardrops

Then I gotta take
caitlin to see
the kung fu rabbi.

Are they coming together?

No, man. I arranged
it so that sharla
gets here first.
Oh.

Kenan, you showed up.
That's a good start.

Hey, sharla.♪ Sharla-a-a ♪

What's he
doing here?

His being here has
nothing to do with us.

He's going to see
the martians from mars
in d, alone.

All by hisself.

[Yelling] let me
get tickets--

That's tickets--to see
martians from marsin d!

Now, don't confuse
the d with the !

Tickets! There you go.
Thank you very much.
Oh, yes.

Tickets? Now,
I thought you said
he was going alone.

Oh, he is, he is.
He just likes to...
Stretch out.

Hey, can I get tickets
to neverending teardrops.
And hurry, please.

[Sarcastically]
oh, right away, sir.

C-come on, sharla.

Ooh, you're so close.
You're so close.

Stop that.

Um, you know, kenan,
I don't usually
give guys

A second chance
once they've
stood me up.

Great, me, too.
Look, I'll be right back.

Kenan, where
are you going?

Uh, it's ok.

Excuse me, I gotta go--
I'm sorry, excuse me.

Whoa-oa-oa!

Whoa-oa-oa!

Hey, man. Did
she show up yet?

No, I haven's seen
yovanda or wanda yet.

Man, I'm not talking
about wanda or yovanda.

I'm talking
about caitlin.
Maybe she won't show up.

Hi, kenan.

Owp! Too bad, kenan.
She showed up.

Hey, caitlin.

What's he
doing here?

He, uh...
Later I'll tell.

Come on. Kung fu rabbi's
about to start.

Kung fu rabbi?
I want to see
neverending teardrops.

No, kung fu rabbi,
it's good. You'll like it.
Wa-a-a-a-h!

I've already seen it.

But it's better
the second time.
Come on.

Hi, can you give me
tickets to the
kung fu rabbi,please?

Didn't I just
see you here like--no!

You have never seen me
before in your life.

Are you sure
we can't see
neverending
teardrops?

Yeah, I heard
kung fu rabbistank!

Look. Neverending
teardropsis...

Is sold out,
I'm sorry.

No, it's not.yes it is.

No, really, it's not.

Look. We wanna see
kung fu rabbi.

Isn't that
a different girl--

Just give me
the tickets, man!
Thank you.

Come on, caitlin.

It's really nice being out.
Just the two of us.

Oh, yeah, just
the two of us.
Ha ha.

Hey, would you mind
getting me some popcorn?

Popcorn? Yes, I will
get you some popcorn.

[Movie music plays]

Where were you?

[Talking loudly]
oh, you know where I was?
I was someplace--

Shhh!
Shhh!shhh!

They won't let
me tell you.

Let's just watch
the movie.

Man, I wish I had
some popcorn right now.

I'ma go get me some.

But we already
have popcorn.

No, we don't.

Hey, what are you doing?

Oh, it was an accident.

Oh, no, it's all gone.
Look at that.

I'm gonna go get some more.

I'm sorry, excuse me.

Watch out!excuse me.
I'm sorry, man.

Sit down!i'm sorry.

Oh! Oh! See! See!
There he is!
There he is!

Wanda and yovanda,

This is alphonse.

Well, it's about time.
Where were you, alphonse?

Alphonse?
What's with alphonse?

No, see, see, um,

I told 'em your
name was alphonse.

That way, if sharla
or caitlin sees you
with yovanda,

You can say, "no, no, no,

She's not with me.
She's with alphonse."

Pretty cool, huh?wow.

Here. Here's
your d glasses.

Now, come on, alphonse.
I want you to buy me

Some juju duds,
a bingo bar,

Soft pretzels,
a diet soda--

Ho-ho-ho-hold on
there, now, yovanda!

Look, I'm sorry,
but there's been a
big misunderstanding.

I know you're
a nice girl
and everything,

But I'm not your
date. All right?
Thank you.

Oh-ho-no, you did
not just say that.

[Sputtering]
I kinda did.

You better be my date.

Kel!

Yes, alphonse?

Kel will explain
everything. I gotta go.

Uh, see, uh, uh...
[Whistles]

Here you go, caitlin.
Here's your--

Bucket.

Where's the popcorn?

Uh--you mean--what?

Aw, man, I asked
for no butter,
not no popcorn.

Let me go get
another one.

That's ok. Just
stay here and watch
the movie with me.

Uh, yeah, ok.

Kenan?
Hmm?

Why are you
wearing d glasses?

But--you mean--oh.

The d glasses
on my face?

Shh!
Shh!
Shh!

It's so that I can
see your beauty
in dimensions.

Aw, that's so sweet.

Yep. Sweet.

This theater is so cold.

Great. Let me go
buy you a jacket.

Actually, I was thinking
maybe I could just
borrow your jacket.

Oh, oh, yeah, of course.
I was just kidding.

Thank you.

Oh, no problem.

[Clears throat]

Now where are you going?

I'm going to
the bathroom

On the roof
in the store--shh!

And the bike flipped
over, and that's why...

Alphonse...doesn't
have...any toes.

What does that have
to do with anything?

Wanda: there
he is, yovanda.

Look, alphonse. I didn't
take the number bus

All the way down here
to get stood up.

Now you date me!

You know, alphonse,
she does have a point.

I mean, the number
bus is no picnic.

Quiet, kel!

No, have you rode
the number bus lately?

Stinky bus.

Look, I'm sorry about
the smelly bus and all,

But, for the last time,
I am not your date.

I know your
not my date.

I'm with wanda.

I wasn't talking
to you, man!

I was talking to
yovanda! Oh! Bye.

No, he is not
walking away from me.

Oh, yes he is, girl.

He's walking right
away from you.

Alphonse!

Excuse me, I'm sorry.

Excuse me, excuse me.sit down!

What took you so long?

That popcorn line
was really long.

So, where's the popcorn?

Hey, that's mine.

Shh! Man, people
are trying to
watch the movie.
But--

Shh!shh!shh!
Shh!

Whoo. Man,
it's cold in here.

What happened
to your jacket?

Uh, what jacket?
I wasn't wearing a jacket.

Yes, you were.

Uh, you're right.
I was wearing a jacket.

I better go look for it.

Alphonse!

I can look for it later.

Yovanda: where are you?!

I saw you come in here.

The nerve of
that girl. Shhhh!

Don't shush me.
Who shushed yovanda?

That would be me.

Sharla, look.
The movies, see?

Alphonse?

Shhhh!

I know you did not
just shush me again.

Uh, could I see
that popcorn?

Here's you popcorn back.

Hey, what are you doing?

Look, little miss missy.

I didn't take
the number bus
all the way down here

To be shushed by
the likes of you.

Well, little miss loudy,

If I was alphonse
I'd hide from you, too.

Yovanda!

Shhh!
Shhh!
Shhh!shhh!

Alphonse is in
the lobby. Let's go.

Kel, is this rude
girl your date?

Uh--uh, no.
She's alphonse's date.

Not kenan's date...

But alphonse's date.

Ok.

Hey, that guy got
a bucket for a head.

Shhh!
Shhh!
Shhh!shhh!

Ok, all right,
I'm sorry,
I'm leaving.

Hey, did they get to
the part in the end
when the main guy dies?

[Audience groans]

Oh, I guess not.
Come on, yovanda.

Kenan, take that bucket
off of your head.

Oh, hey. How did
that get on there?

Oh, we're out
of popcorn again.

I better go get some more.

Let me guess. You'll
be right back, right?

Yes.

One more time,
one more time.

I thought you said
he was out here.

Oh, yeah? I thought
yousaid he was out here.

Wanda: ooh, girl,
here he comes.

Yovanda, look.
Let's get something
straight right now.

My name is not
alphonse, and I'm not
on a date with you.

Look, alphonse.

I don't have time
for your little games.

I am this close to leaving.

Good! Go away,
man, please?

Isn't the number bus
leaving in minutes?

Kenan, what is
going on here?

[Squeaks]

No, you are not
talking to my man.

Your man?that's what I said.

Who is she?

Uh, uh, see, uh,
what happened was,

Uh, see, this is
kenan's other date,

But it's ok,
because she thinks

His name is alphonse.

Other date?

No--no--no,
not other date.

This crazy girl
thinks she's my date,

But she's not,
believe me.

I'm here on a date
with you and nobody else.

Oh, kenan.
There you are.

Except her.

Uh, caitlin,
this is sharla.
Sharla, caitlin.

Uh, that's wanda
and this is yovanda.

Uh, and I believe
you all know kel.