04x16 - Tales from the Clip

[bunniefuu]

Oh, here it goes.

♪ Everybody out there
go run and tell ♪

♪ Your homeboys
and homegirls ♪

♪ It's time for
kenan and kel ♪

♪ They'll keep you laughing
in the afternoon ♪

♪ So don't touch that dial,
don't leave the room ♪

♪ Because they're always
into some more fun ♪

♪ And you don't
want to miss it ♪

♪ It's double k
like two the good way ♪

♪ Kenan and kel, or should
I say kel and kenan? ♪

♪ And you gotta
watch kenan ♪

♪ 'Cause kenan be scheming
with a plan or a plot ♪

♪ To make it to the top ♪

♪ But they're kinda
in the middle ♪

♪ 'Cause they're always
getting caught ♪

♪ This ain't the hardy boys
or nancy drew mystery ♪

♪ It's just kenan and kel
in your vicinity ♪

♪ Like zigfried and roy
or abbott and costello ♪

♪ Magic and kareem
or penn and teller ♪

♪ Somebody's in trouble?
Oh, here it go ♪

♪ On nick nick nick nick
nick nick nick nick ♪♪

[Loud cheers and applause]

Oh, yeah!
Thank you very much.

Welcometo the

Kenan & kel show.

If you came up to me

On the street and said,
"hey, is
your name
roy?"

I'd say, "no, my name
is kenan!"

[Loud cheers]

And if you didn't
ask my name,

I'd probably say
my name is kel!

[Loud cheers]

Yeah.
All right, now.

We got an extra
special show for
y'all tonight.

Boy, I tell ya.

Really? What's so
extra special about it?

Tonight's show
is a clip show.

Oh, a clip show?

What's a clip show?

A clip show is where
we say stuff like...

"Boy, we sure have
had some good times
together."

And then we stare
off dreamily,

And the audience gets
to watch highlights
from past episodes.

I think I understand.

Let me demonstrate.
[Clears throat]

Gee, kel, we sure
have done some
crazy things

In front of this
curtain, huh?

Like I was saying
they came up with
the name kenan & kel
because...

Energize.
Ho!

Oh, that's
a good feeling.

I like the energ---

Kenan!

I could do this
more often.

What are you doing,
man?

Noooo!

Kel? Kel?

Kels. There's of you.

Hit it!

It's raining
on the inside.

Told ya!

Why is it only
raining on you?

Because I have
an umbrella!

Ooh. Oh. Yeah.

Oh. But kenan...

Where we going?

Just follow my lead.

See? That's all
there is to it.

Wow. So all you have
to do is saying something
and look off like that,

And then the audience
get to see cool clips.

Why don't you
give it a try?

Ok. [Clears throat]

Hey, man, remember
that one time?

Kel?

Kel? Kel!

Would you stop?!
I was in the middle
of a highlight.

Kel, that never
happened on our show.

Ooohh.

Maybe you should just
leave the thinking
to me, huh?

Well, maybe you should
just do the show
by yourself.

You're kinda
overreacting,
ain't ya?

No, no, no, no!

You always acting like
I'm always messing
everything up!

Just like in these
next set of clips!

Bye, kenan!

Kel!

Don't get so upset,
man.

Uh--kel.

I'm supposed
to run off

And you're supposed
to yell after me.

Ooowww! Here it goes!

Yeah.

We're open
until :.

Ok, you better
hurry up.

I know :
rolls around,

I'm locking up
and I'm going home.

Help!

I've gotta catch
the bus and it's
a long way.

Ah!
All right.
Ok, bye.

Ho!

I--dropped the screw--
in the tuna!

I--dropped the screw--

In the tuna!

It was me!
Oh, the humanity!

Oh oh oh!

I--dropped the screw--

In the tuna!

[Creaking sound]

You'll never make
the circus, pale face!

Aw! I'm all covered
in donut!

What do we do now?

[Alarm ringing]

I don't think that
was the light switch!

No kidding!

Let's just get
outta here!

And well worth it.

We're giving away
that nice tv
right there.

It's worth more
than bucks!

Got it!

Look, kenan,
I got my balloon back.

No way!i don't believe it.

One minute we were
talking about the clip show,

And then kel got all mad.

Well, maybe we shouldn't
be doing a clip show.

Come on, sheryl,
kids love clip shows.

Oh, hey, roger,
sheryl.

Hey, kel,
I didn't mean
anything before

When I said that,
you know--

Key, can you tell
kenan I'm not talking
to him anymore.

Uh, kenan, kel's not
talking--

I heard him.

Uh, kel, if you're
not speaking to kenan,

Then what are
you doing here?

Well, I thought
I'd come over

And we'd all watch
some clips of
all the times

Kenangot us
into trouble.

That could be
entertaining.

Oh, yes, it could.

Because see, kenan's
always the one scheming
and plotting and stuff.

Actually, kel,
that's not necessary,
man.

Too late!

I'm already staring
off into space
dreamily.

I'm gonna stay here
and try to delay things
as much as possible.

How are you gonna
do that?

Eh heh, eh heh?

Oh!

Will you stop that?
We don't have
a lot of time.

Start licking.

What am
I gonna lick?

I don't know,
lick everything.all right.

Why didn't you just
leave a message?

I didn't practice
leaving a message.

I think you're
better off.
Why do you want
to date that girl?

Her dad's mean,
horrible jerk.

My father's the one
that thinks he's
a mean, horrible jerk.

You know?

Ha ha ha.

I mean, one time
my dad said that
mr. Dawson was so dumb,

He couldn't find
his face with
both hands!

Oh, man. Pop said
he's gonna have

Mr. Dawson's job
before too long,

So he's just
waiting until he...

Has his job.
Right, kenan?

Hey, kenan!
Ha ha!

What's wrong, kenan?
Kenan?

Kenan, what's wrong?
Kenan--kenan.

Kenan.

Stop saying my name!

Why, kenan?

Why do you have
my jewelry box?

Because I took
your jewelry box,
mark...

If that is
your real name.

Yeah.

That's right.

You weren't robbed.
That was me and kel.yeah!

Mark, here,
stole my watch,

So we went over there
and stole his box.
Ain't that right?

Give it to me.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, yeah.
See, he is a thief,

And I have proof
of it right here.

My watch is in
his jewelry box.

Yeah!

I'm outta here.

No, no, no, no!
Wait, wait!
Please!

Now, come on!
I promised all those
people out there

That they could take
a picture with you.

Well,
you shouldn't have.

I know,
but come on,
please.

Just do-oo it!

Get out of here.

Ok, now listen up,
everybody! Listen!

Now if we want to
get out of here,

We gotta stay focused
on the door.

Ok, now, I'm gonna stand
next to the door, right?

Sooner or later,
somebody's gonna come in here,

And i-i-i'm going to
make sure...

[All shouting]

The door doesn't close.

Thanks, kel.

Did somebody
say something? I--

Fine! If you're
gonna be that way,

Well then, I'm not
speaking to you neither.

Hah! Well then,
I'm not speaking
to you either!

Fine!
Fine!

Fine!
Fine!

Fine!
Fine!

Fine!
Fine!

Ok. Well, since
we're not speaking
to each other anymore,

Then you can
have your stupid
bowling ball back.
Ugh!

Oohhh!

Are you ok,
honey?

You know how many times
that boy has caused me pain?

Kenan: ?

No. It's been
a lot more than that.

Ooh, this is hot!

Hey!

Aahhh!

Ow!

Man!

Wake up!

Wake up!

Aaaahhhh!

Aaahh!

Ha ha ha!

Oh, no! Kenan!

Hey, chris.

Hey, kel.

Ohh! Whoo!

Who loves orange soda?

Kel, I hate to
interrupt you, but--

Don't you ever get
tired of that?

Tired of what?

Th-the whole
orange soda thing.

What orange soda
thing?

Maybe I should
show you...

These clips.

Wow.

Oh! Oh!

Who loves orange soda?

Oh, here it goes.

Kel loves orange soda.

Is it true?

Mm-hmm!

I do, I do, I do,
I do, I do...

Kel loves orange soda.

Is this true?

Kenan and kel:
mm-hmm.

I do, I do, I do,
I doo-oo!

To turn your insides
bright orange,

You'd have to drink
or gallons of
orange soda every day.

Yeah, doc.
So what's your point?

♪ Let me tell ya
a little something
'bout a orange drink ♪

♪ It's cold, carbonated,
and it sure ain't pink ♪

♪ So forget about your coffee
and your sausage links ♪

♪ 'Cause orange soda's in time
and it's time to drink ♪

♪ Orange soda! ♪

[Crowd]
♪ orange soda! ♪

♪ Ooooohh yeah! ♪

♪ And now wave your cans
in the air! ♪

♪ I said wave your cans
in the air! ♪

Now, we must drink me.

Who said that?

It's me,
the orange soda.

I want you
to drink me.

But--but orange soda
bottles can't talk.

Yes, we can.
Open me up.

Taste my
orange goodness.

Ok.

Come to papa.
There you go.

Hey, hey, hey, hey!
You're gonna have to
pay for that.

Pfffftt!

What?

I must drink
the orange soda.

Both:
nooo!

Aaahhhh!

Ooohh! Ooohh!

Hey, what can I say?
Kel loves orange soda.

Can I have
a copy of that?

All right, man.
I'll see you later,
chris.

W-w-wait. Aren't you
gonna hang out until
kenan gets here?

Uh--

Kenan and I are not
friends anymore.

What?

[Loudly]
kenan and I are not
friends anymore!

I heard you.
I'm just shocked
that you and kenan
aren't friends.

What happened?

Well, basically,
he started--

Wait, wait, wait.
Don't tell me.
Let me guess.

You and kenan are
fighting over a girl.

Why would you
think that?

Because, whenever
a girl is involved,

Nothing ever
goes right.

Here, here,
look at this.

Chris, you don't have to
watch a tape of highlights

Of kenan and I with girls.

All you have to do is
look off in the distance,
dreamily.

Come on,
do it with me,

Hi.

Both: hello!

Cute feet.

Thanks.

So what's your name?

Leanne.

Leanne!

Mm-hmm!

Listen. Can one of
you guys tell me

Where I might be able
to find the orange soda?

You like
orange soda?

Oh, I love orange soda.

I love orange soda.

Well, this is a conversation
you don't hear every day.

I'm not ready
to call her yet.

I need the practice.

Here. You be amy.

Who are you gonna be?

Me!
I'll be me.

Ok, cool.

Ring!

Ring!

Ring!

Man, pick up the shoe!!

Oh. Ok.

[Imitating girl's voice]
hello.

Uh, yes, yes.
Is this amy?

Yes, it is.

Oh. Hi, this is kenan.

Oh, kenan!
Wait, wait.

Let me get out
the other shoe.

Girl! Guess who
on the line!

Oh, yeah!

Hey, kenan.

What?

That rootie was
kinda cute, huh?

Oh, yeah, she's fine.

I think she liked me, too.
You saw her checking me out.

Ha ha! You should
ask her out.

No, man. She'll probably
ask me out first.

Yeah, she did look
pretty desperate.

Yeah. But I tell you
one thing,

If I dogo out
with her, man,

I am not wearing these
stupid, ugly rice pants.

You know, for somebody
that works in a clothing store,

She sure has bad taste
in clothing.

Look, alfonse,
I didn't take
the number bus

All the way down here
to get stood up.

Now you date me!

You know, alfonse,
she does have a point.

I mean, the number bus
is no picnic.

Quiet, kel!

Have you rode
the number bus
lately?

Sticky bus.

Boy, look at kel
and that old lady...

Kenan. You were
the special guy

I wanted to go
to the dance with
all along.

I was?

You mean--
I'm the special guy?

Don't get carried away.
I mean, you aren't
all that special.

We're gonna slow it down
for the sweethearts in
the house tonight.

Would you like
to dance?

I thought you'd
never ask.

Man speaking: hey, kenan,
doesn't look like
tamilia to me.

Kenan: mind your business.

Kenan, when did
you get here?

Oh, I came in during
the last set of highlights.

And uh,
for the record, chris,

Kel and I aren't
fighting over a girl.

We're fighting 'cause
kel being a big ol'
baby.

[Kel imitating kenan]
kel's being a big ol' baby.

Stop it!

Stop it!

Kel! Get outta here,
and never come back!

Kel, get outta here
and never come back!

Oh--oh.

Oh, that's what
you want, huh?

Now you want me
to get outta here
and never come back!

Well, you're gonna
get what you want.
All right?

I'm leaving and never
coming back!

Good! Who needs ya!

That was pretty dramatic.

You think you guys
are ever gonna make up?

Maybe, maybe not.

But I guess
we'll have to wait

Until after
the commercials
to find out.

Oh, commercials.

Rockmores!

Hey, man, y'all
didn't install no
orange soda machine
up in here!

Oh, where'd you put
the orange soda machine?

Kel, there is no
orange soda machine.

We just said that
to get you over here.

What a cruel
thing to do.

Good morning,
parents.

What's he doing here?

Hey, trust me,
I don't wanna
be here.

We wanted to get
you boys together

So we could work
this thing out.

No, thanks.

I knew you'd say that,
so--

And we figured
since you can't seem
to work things out
yourselves

And you're not
gonna listen to us,

Then maybe you'd
listen to...

A fireman!

How're you doin',
fellas.

Is that a fireman?

You know, with my
experiences as a fireman,

I know you sometimes
fight with people that
you love the most.

What do we do about it?

Well, all you gotta do
is take a moment and--

Think of the good
times you've had
with that person.

Well, that's
an idea.

Whaddya say we all
give it a try?

Whoa!

Oh, we just made a date
with fine girls!

I know! Ohhh!
It's a happy day!

Ohh! Happy! Happy!

Hello. Oh!

We're just practicing
the heimlich maneuver.

Yeah, just in case
one of you guys
choke on our date.
Ha ha!

Right.

And jake has it...!

You two,
please, please!

I need one of you
to be santa claus.

What?

Please, I have
irate parents
and children over here--

Demanding!--To see
santa claus.

I can't be
santa claus.

Yes. You could
help me--

I'll pay you $.

What can santa bring you
for christmas this year?

I want a tuba phone.

Yeah! Good call!
Ha ha!

Thanks, elf.

I gotcha.

Ok, I'm gonna get in.

Ooh.

Helping.what are you doing?

That's not helping.

We can get into
a lot of trouble
doing this.

I know that, kel.

Almost got it,
almost--whoop!

You're gonna
make us fall!

I'm sorry.

[Woman on tv
speaking spanish]

Nooooo!

[Man on tv speaking spanish]

Oh! [Speaking gibberish]

Ah!

Dd-dd-dd-dd-dd!

Man, why are we
watching a spanish
soap opera?

Do you even know
what's going on?

Yes, I know
what's going on!

Hector just dumped
juanita for consuelo,

Who he thought was
lost in the jungle,

But actually, it was
her evil twin sister,
rena.

What?

Come on, kel!

Da da-da-da-da
da da da!

How do I look?

Ridiculous.
Who are you
supposed to be?

Betty the poodle pixie!

Uh-huh. Well,
come on, pixie,

Let's just find my comic
and get outta here.

Yeah.

Just imagine,
in a couple of hours,

We're gonna be
cruisin' in our
new car.

Ha ha ha!

[Imitating
starting up car]
wh-ne-ne-ne-ne-ne-ne!

[Car starts]
re-ne-ne-ne-ne-ne!
Pppfhhh!

Oh!

Mmmrrrrrrhhh!

Nice day for
a drive, ain't it?
Ha ha.

Look at those people
waiting for the bus.

Check this out.

Hey, want a ride?!
Get a car!

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Wa-wait.
Hold on, hold on.

Watch out!

Hey, learn how
to drive!

Yeah, learn how to drive!
What you doing?

Ow!

Get funky.

Sounds hot!yes.

Funk is good.

I feel good.

♪ Make you feel good! ♪

Ow!

Whoo!

Can I help you?

Your correct score
is .

Ah! I'm a genius.

You did not get
a .

I didn't?

No. Actually--
you got a .

Aaahhh!

Woo-hoo! Man,
my brain is
so powerful!

I bet I can break
this desk with it.
Aah!

Good night, boys.
You should both be
very proud of your scores.

Thank you!woo-hoo!

Yeah!we're both a genius!

Oh, thank you,
mr. Fireman.

My pleasure.

Oh. Hey, uh, since this
is a clip show,

Is it ok if I show
some clips of me
fighting fires?

I think we need
to watch those outside

And leave the boys
alone, ok?

But I wanted
everyone to see 'em.

You know, that
fireman's right.

We have had some
pretty good times
together.

Yeah.
We sure have.

Well, look, kel--
uh--i'm sorry.

No, no, no, man.
I'm sorry.

I mean, it was
all my fault.

I was acting like
a big baby.

Yeah, you're right.

Yeah, friends, man.

You're my boy,
man.

I'm sorry.
All right.

I'm sorry what
I done, done.

Whoo!

Phew!

Hey, man.
Remember that time
the fireman came

And saved
our friendship?

Well, yeah.
I mean, that was
just--

What you gotta do
is take the moment and--
think of the good times--

Kel!
What?

That just happened.

I know.
Wanna see it again?

No, no, no, no.
I got a better idea.

Let's jump in front
of those curtains
and finish the show.

Great idea, man.
Come on.

[Loud cheers and applause]

Thank you.

Thank you.

Well, that was
our clip show.

Did you all
enjoy it?

[Cheering and applause]

All right.
Ha ha.

Kenan, you know how
at the end of the show

You're always telling me
to grab stuff and
meet you somewhere?

Yeah.
What about it?

Just watch.

Grab two shovels
and some coconuts--

Peanut butter
and some snow shoes--

Cheddar cheese,
some swiss cheese,
and some macaroni
and cheese--

A seal, some veal,
and shaquille o'neal--

A surfboard and some
bug spray--

Some cheerleaders
and some cheerleaders.

A clown, a flagpole,
and a submarine--

Mm.
A spice girl

And a spicy burrito-to--

A walrus, and one of
them little round
sticky things--

Two dozen
assorted donuts

And an aardvark.

Some bread, some sticks,
and some breadsticks.

A drumstick
and a mannequin--

Pounds of ice
and a knockwurst.

A talky towel and
a throat lozenge--

A brain--[clears throat],
a heart, and some courage.

A bicycle pump,
a white picket fence,

A magic flute,
one of them little
bitty blue things,

A pound of butter,
a paddy mill, alarm,
bryant gumbel,

And a bunch of
assorted cookies
and other things
we can snack on,

And meet me
at the circus!

Ok. What did we watch
that clip for?

Hey, well, man.
Since you're my
best friend and all,

I got you everything
you asked for.

Wow!
I can't believe
you did this.

Oh! It was nothing.

You know,
that gives me
ideas.

Kel, why don't you
grab all that stuff
and, uh,

Meet me back here
in a half an hour.

Oh, yeah.

But-but-but-but,
kenan!

Do you want me to say
"aw, here it goes,"

Or do you want me
to run a whole bunch
of clips of me saying it?

Kenan?

Kenan!

Aw, here it goes!

Why?!