02x16 - Now Cracks a Noble Heart

[bunniefuu]

I'm a virgin.
I'm a virgin too.

LORETTA: There's always the surgical
option — hymen-repair surgery. They
just sew it back together.

f*ck.

Will you marry me?

Shit, yeah.

BOTH LAUGH

This is a message for Wolfgang West.
Because of him his family doesn't
have furniture, food or clothing

because some g*ng bastard's ripped
us off because someone ripped them
off.

When's it gonna end, eh?
When's it gonna bloody end?

ROCK MUSIC

ENGINE REVS

Cheryl.

Cheryl!

Cheryl!

WOLF HOWLS

You're back, are you?

I'm back, all right.

(GASPS)

You OK?
Yeah, I think so.

This is ridiculous.

What is?

Here I am, a rich man, and here we
are, on the floor on a scungy old
mattress.

Rich man, huh?

Yeah. , , baby — all ours.

Well, will be soon.

Ours?

The woman I love should have the
most comfortable bed in a house with
actual furniture.

I don't want your pity.

Are you sure?
Mm.

Because I can be
very very persuasive.

Ow. What is that?

It'd be just like Christmas. People
would bring us all sorts of stuff.

No, they won't.

Well, we could ask them to.

Doesn't matter. They still won't.

Do you not want an engagement party?

Yeah, of course I do. Did you
bite me or something last night?

(GASPS) Ew!

Fleas!

ALL COMPLAIN LOUDLY

HELLO SAILOR'S 'GUTTER BLACK'

♪ Lying in the gutter,

♪ I cut the cord from my mother.

♪ She pat me on the head and said,

♪ 'Go to sea, boy.
Get to sea, man.'

♪ My luck in the gutter black.

♪ I guess I'm running back...

♪ ...to you.

♪ You in my brain.
You in my heart. ♪

What the hell are you doing?
I can still feel them all over me.

Chill out.
What were you doing?

(GROANS) Is this your house?

No. Mine's got furniture.

Ha ha (!) f*ck off.

How are you, Pascalle?

Well, for your information, even
though you are lower than pond
slime,

things have actually turned out for
the best. Oh, apart from the fleas.

Because I have met Bruce, the love
of my life, with qualifications,
integrity

and is also very spunky, and you've
met someone totally at your level —
Loretta.

You still model?
No. I have better things to do.

That's a shame.
Why?

Cos I'm producing a movie.

Loretta's? ]

(SCOFFS) That'll be
minutes of t*rture.

No, it's a feature.

Two hours of misery, then.

No, this is entertainment. Fully
funded, professional cast and crew.

Yeah, and you'd be
perfect for the lead.

Really?

How could you think it
was gonna work out—?

Calm down. Calm down. ]

[ I'm not calming down.
Look. Look at me.

Calm down and I'll get a flea b*mb.

Yeah, and stick it up his arse.

I don't care what you do, I am not
sleeping on that mattress again.

So we'll all need beds.

What do you mean 'we'?
You've got a bed.

I have an idea of how we can
get house stuff without paying.
No way.

No, no, no, it's not stealing.
It's called... an engagement party.

(CHUCKLES)

Cos when you get engaged, you have
a party and people bring you stuff.

WOMEN LAUGH

What?

Oh, I'm sorry, love, but, you know,
at West parties, the only presents
people bring is piss,

and then they drink it all.
Lovely thought, though.

I told you, babe.
I like the idea of a party, though.
We could really use one of those.

Right, where's the fire?

Eric, those mattresses
that you gave us—

Yeah, they're quality, they were.
Got them from a lovely old lady in
Massey.

Did she have cats, by chance?

She bred Persians, as a matter
of... How did you know?

Oh, good police work.

They left souvenirs, you moron.
Eh?

Fleas.

Oh, that's not so bad, is it?
I mean, at least you've got
somewhere to lay your head—

OK, all right. I'll see what
else I've got down the shop.

Come on, Cheryl. This is ridiculous.

Why should you settle for any
vermin-infested crap Eric fobs
off on you

when I'm more than happy to march
everyone down to the furniture store
and buy them whatever they need?

Cos I'm not gonna let you.

What?

No. I said no.

Why are you saying that?

Because I'm not letting Wayne
spend his money on us.

Yeah.

It's his money, and he
doesn't even have it yet.

That's why the good Lord
gave us credit cards.

That is so sweet of you!

And she threw it back in my face cos
now she's got a sugar daddy buying
her brand new beds.

How the f*ck can he afford that?

He PERFed off the cops.
That's where my taxes go.

You don't pay taxes.

He got quarter of a mil.

My kids won't go for that.

Pascalle gave him a great big hug.
Yeah, they're all into it — apart
from Jed, of course,

which is why they got rid of him.

Loretta wouldn't buy it.

She couldn't care less. She's too
busy shagging herself senseless.

What?

With your so-called mate Hayden
bloody Peters. Yeah, he's rooting
his way through your family.

Mind you, on the bright side,
Van's getting hitched.

Van's getting married? To who?

The ganger banger. The biker bint.

You're right out of the loop, aren't
ya? Good thing you caught up with
me.

Get out of the car.

Eh?

I need to borrow it.

All right, OK.

Wow. Oh. OK, don't think you can
buy the affections of my children.

Theirs are bought and paid for.
It's yours I'm after.

♪ The beautiful things.
The beautiful things.

♪ The beautiful things, we see
them every moment of the day.

(SNORTS)

(LAUGHS)

♪ The beautiful things.
The beautiful things.

♪ We're full of desire every
second, every moment of the day —

♪ desire to touch, to have,
to have and to hold.

♪ The beautiful things.

♪ The beautiful things.
The beautiful things.
The beautiful things.

♪ We come from the
land of the new. ♪

Excuse me. Sorry.

Van. Van! Come on, get up.

What?

(SCREAMS)

That's disgusting.

Can you move them away from the
house so the fleas don't come back?

I will pay you back, you know.

I want to do this. No strings.

Thank you.

Hey, so, when's this party?

Tomorrow night. We can't have people
trashing the new lounge suite.

That's not much time to organise it.

Piss-up for, what,
people? Easy-peasy.

Mm, but it's not just any old
piss-up. This is our engaging
piss-up.

Mm, booze, food, people.
I'll sort it and it'll be magic.

So I don't have to do nothing?

Except music. Mm, the new stereo's
not coming until next week, eh?

(BURPS)

What's this?
It's your cash-flow card.

[ Yeah, I know.

Use it to go to the bank and take
money out with it and buy us a
really good stereo.

Yeah, but the pig's
already paid for one.

We need music now, and plus this way
we'll have one of our own for when
we move into our own place.

(GRUNTS)

Off you go. Go. And don't lose the
card or the money. And make sure
it's a really choice one.

Munt.

Mm. (LAUGHS) Yeah, this paying for
shit with your card thing, man,
still blows me away, eh.

Eh? Catch up with the
rest of the world, bro.

Oh, nah, I mean, I just...
I never use it, you know. ]

It's your card.
Mm. But Aurora, she keeps it.

Ah.

What 'ah'?

She's on the change.

No, she still gets her period.

Not that change. The other one.

The one that's just
how it is with chicks.

And how is it?

They've got this life cycle, like
on one of those nature programmes.

Chicks, man, they start out buying
you beers, rolling you a big number,
cooking you the mean feeds,

having sex whenever you want,
and it's all great. But one day
you go, 'Let's get married.'

And...?
And that's when it happens, man.

As soon as they've got that ring
that cute little chick turns into
this bossy housewife,

bossing you around your house,
telling you to pick up your clothes,
and that's it —

no more beers or feeds for you.

Yeah, but where did
you get this — TV?

No. Worked it out myself.

Nah, I mean, Aurora's not like that.
She isn't gonna change.

Bro, she won't be able to help it.

[ Don't let anyone see your PIN.
They might guess it's your birthday.

It's not. It's Aurora's.

Right.

What, just cos she suggested
using her birthday

that's suddenly evidence
she's gonna turn into a cow?

So what's her PIN?

What's your point?
I don't have one.

Good.

You wanna be careful waving that
cash around. Someone might steal it.

Dad.

Shit.
Hey, Wolf.

Munter, could I have a
moment alone with my son?

Yeah. Yeah, OK.

What's this crap I hear
about you getting married?

It's not crap.

And I'm doing it, cos Aurora,
she's the best woman in the world,

and there's nothing
you can do to stop me.

Why would I wanna stop you? I just
wanna know when I'm getting my
invite.

What, you'd come?

'Course I'd come. Time and place —
you let me know. You're a good boy.
You deserve some happiness.

OK, well, Dad, how will you come?
You've got the cops after you and
everything.

Just let me know when and where.

OK, but, Dad, how am
I gonna let you—?

I'll be in your movie.

What?

I'll be in your movie.

How do you know about it?

Hayden told me. ]

And what else did he tell you?

That I'd be perfect for the lead.

You don't wanna be in this.

But I was a model-cum-actress.

No, you weren't. But you were
quite good at the 'come' part.

I really really need some money.
Don't we all?

I need some money for my surgery.
To be a proper reconstructed virgin,
it's gonna cost me $ .

Do this film, you'll
need the operation.

So that's a yes?

No, it's not.

Oh, come on, we're family.

All the more reason to say no.

N with an O spells 'get
the hell out of here'.

No, it's spells no.

Get the hell out of here.

You don't have to be
so negative about it.

KNOCK AT DOOR ]

Hey, man.
What's urgent?

Nothing.

You wanted to see me.

I don't think so.

I got a message.

Dad.
Gidday, Wolf.

Hey, about that message — there was
one, although I'm not sure you got
it.

That's for what you did to Pascalle.

That's for what you're
doing to Loretta.

You hurt my little girl, there'll
be more where that came from.

I won't hurt her.

Piss off before I do
some real damage!

Popped in to chat (?)

Did you know what that prick was
doing to your little sister?

Well, she's not complaining.

That's a nice attitude (!)

Sometimes people do what they want,
Dad, not just what you tell them.

Is that right?

So, how are ya? (CLEARS THROAT)

Yeah, not too bad, although I do
need a bit of a hand with something.

Sure. What's that?

I need some cash.

You emptied your account.

I know that, Jethro. I gave you
$ , to start this business once.
I'd like it back.

What, just like that?

It's family money. Now I need it.

You get it in cash, put it in
here and bring it back to me.

You're a lawyer, so you're used
to taking instructions, right?

You will get this money in exactly
the manner I tell you and it won't
be a problem, will it?

You know, he's taking a big risk
being seen around here, eh? He's
gonna end up back inside.

(CHUCKLES) It's a lot
of money for a stereo.

Yeah, but I've gotta
get a real good one.

We used to get good ones, but we'd
blow them up or spill stuff on them
and get another one.

Yeah, but this is different.

Why, cos it's your marriage stereo?

Shut up.

I think it's a waste, that's all,
especially cos my cuzzie's in town.

Which cousin?

You know, from Whakatane.

Oh, that one that can drink
beer through his nose?

Nah, the one that works at the
kiwifruit place near Te Puke.

What, the 'Te Puke thunder' guy?

That one.

Why did you say he's from Whakatane?

Cos he's from Whakatane,
but he stays in Te Puke.

Is he holding any thunder?

Shitloads, bro.

You've gotta buy a stereo cos your
missus says so. Stink. Nice, though.
Real nice.

Mm.

(LAUGHS MORONICALLY)

Man, this plastic is so slippy.

Yeah, you get that with plastic.

Oof.

Hey, are you all right down there?

Are you all right up there?

Come on, get up. Have a coffee.

Yeah, we'll get the other lot.

Hey, Mum?

Yes, love.

I saw Dad today.

Where?

In the street.

But it was weird, though, because
he said that he was gonna be at the
wedding, right?

PHONE RINGS

But we don't even...
We don't know when...

West house.

WOLF: Jesus, answering
my bloody phone now?

Luckily, you're just the person
I wanted to speak to, Sergeant.

I'm not a sergeant now.

You'll always be a cop to me.

What do you want, Wolf?

I reckon it's about time we got
a few things straight between you
and me.

Oh, is that so?

We meet, just the two of us.

(HANGS UP PHONE)

Now, here's a room with a view.

We've been discussing fashion.

I need new trousers for the do. Tell
your mother. You better spruce up.

I'll do my best.

You're coming?

Ted's invited me. There'll be sex,
dr*gs and sausage rolls, in any
order.

You don't have to if you don't want.

He wants to, don't you, Imran?

It'll be a great chance
to get to know your family.

You've already met them once.

I said I'd show him where
all the bodies are buried.

BOTH LAUGH

Dad's a bit old-fashioned when
it comes to his girls, eh.

No shit.

So you don't need to
go to the hospital?

No, I'll be fine.

Shit! What was that for?

You asked Pascalle to be in
our movie. How could you?

She'd be great as Serenity.

I am not directing my
sister in a porn film.

[ You don't have to do this.
It'll be OK.

Will you hit him with your cast?

Me and him need to sort this out.

What if he brought mates?
He won't!

[ How do you know?

Look, this may be the last time
either of us have to see him.
Now, is that what you want?

Of course.

Right. So it's not an offer
I'm about to turn down.

Yeah, well, how nice for you boys,
having a showdown at the bloody OK
Corral.

Cheryl!
Fine! Go, if that's what you have to
do. Just... Just please come back.

'Course I will.

What was that about?

What happened to you?

He saw Dad today.

Yeah, just a friendly, 'Hello, and
keep your hands off my daughter.'

Message received and ignored.

WHISPERS: Shit. Shit.

PEOPLE CHATTER

Evening, officer.

Told you, I'm all done with that.

So we won't be getting another
visit from your mates in blue, eh?

Nah, just you and me.

On me.
Aren't you the saint (?)

Don't you trust me, Wayne?

You could have some mates
hiding in the toilets.

Oh, my mates don't hide in toilets.

Nah, you've got a better
quality of associates (!)

Hey, you'd be looking for a new
career around now, won't you?

Let's see. With a name like Wayne,
I can see you as a security guard
or a traffic warden.

'Hey, you can't park there.'

You're a f*ckin' comedian (!)

And you're the prick that
f*cked my wife behind my back!

Wasn't like I had to force her.

So, how is Cheryl, anyway?

Not bad, considering some f*ckin'
scum stole everything she owns.

Yeah, well, not much I can do about
that. I hear you're taking good care
of her.

Yeah, when she lets me.

(CHUCKLES) Mm.

She is independent.

(SNIFFS) Look, obviously I'm not
too happy about the way things have
turned out.

But it doesn't look like I've got
much choice in the matter, does it?

No, not much.

What's this?

Give it to Cheryl. Tell her
there's no hard feelings,

at least not from my end.

That's it?

You wanted this big
powwow, and we're done?

Said what I came to say.

Not much point hanging around,
is there? Besides, the best man's
already won, hasn't he?

I guess that means
he's leaving town. ]

Yeah, I guess.

(CHUCKLES) I wrote these to him

when he was inside

the first time he ever got put away.

Loretta was just a baby.

He kept them.

His will.

He's changed it.

No bastard child?

No.

What does it matter? Like he thinks
this is gonna make it all right.

He's a f*cking coward, that's what
he is. He's a dirty, rotten f*cking
coward. (SOBS)

It's OK.

It's OK. He's gone. He's gone.

Yeah.

Sweet. One more.

Choice.

BOTH LAUGH

Oh, here. Chuck it down there.

Just here, boy.

Hope you got soft drink.

We got Coke to go with the rum
and tonic to go with the gin.

Some people don't drink. Some
people like raspberry and lemonade.
Why?

They just do. And if you get sausage
rolls, can you get beef? Bruce
doesn't eat pork.

Bathroom's free.

Grandpa needs new pants.

OK. I'll give you the money.

No, I can't do it.
I've gotta go to work.

Van can pick them up when
he's getting the stereo.

Eh?

Hi.

You know Loretta's movie?

Can't you put a lock on the door?!

We used to have one, but people
just kept kicking it in.

Were you being honest when
you said I'd be perfect?

Yeah.
Well, what's it about?

It's a, um, it's a coming-of-age
story. Yeah. It's about a woman
looking to fulfil her potential.

And I'd be that woman?

That was my thought, yeah.

I wouldn't do it for
under five grand, cash.

Really?

Not a cent less.

OK. Fine.
Cool.

One small problem, though —
creative differences.

Aren't you the producer?

Yeah.

Doesn't that make you
the boss of the director?

I made this clear last night.
She's my sister. No f*cking way.

You wanna be a professional,
get over this.

Over what?
Over this 'ew' reaction.

You cannot expect me to direct my
own sister to do the things that
Serenity's meant to do in this film.

Actually, she, um, she probably
won't need all that much direction.

Oh, Loretta, she's
perfect for the part.

Cos she's a root-bag ho?
Cos you wanna watch?

Or because you have such fond
memories of what you two used to do?

Because she's beautiful. And let's
face it — we need eye candy in this
film. We badly need eye candy.

Well, find someone.

The gap between people willing to
play the role and people who aren't
dogs is huge.

Keep looking.
And find more dogs?

Pascalle's not in this film!

Sorry, it's a business call.
I'm the director.

Well, I'm the producer.

I'm putting up the funds, and
no matter how fond I am of the
director, what I say goes.

Bro, you get a room, right,
with a bathroom and a TV.

And three feeds a day.
Man, I can't wait till I'm old.

Yeah. Hey, maybe we could
use this as a down payment.

On a room?
No, on a stereo, d*ck.

If we do that, then
Grandpa's got no trousers.

Never used to bother him.

Why can't we just get a stereo
the way we've always got one —

OK, cruise around Te Atatu...
and see who's not home?

Cos I said I'd buy one.

Yeah, because she told you to.

No, cos I don't want to lie to her.

Yeah, well, if Aurora was the
perfect chick, she wouldn't care.

All right. So we'll go and get
Grandpa's pants and we'll cruise
around Te Atatu, see who's not home.

Sweet. (LAUGHS)

OK, but we can't get caught, all
right? In, out. No smashing stuff.

And we've gotta get a real good one,
man, with big, grunty speakers—
Dude.

No crap all-in-one.
Dude.

We could get one that you can plug
a mic into, bro, and we can do
karaoke.

Dude! ]
What?

Yeah, all right.

So, you wanna be in my movie.

I knew Hayden would
make you see sense.

You should read this.

Is that my contract?

No, it's called the script.

Oh.

You're meant to read it.

That'll take ages.
I've got a class to take.

Hayden didn't tell you what
kind of film this is, did he?

Something about a woman coming of
age and fulfilling her potential.

Look, I don't care. He's gonna pay
me five grand and he thinks I'm
perfect for the part.

Read this.
Do I have to?

Read it from where it says...

(READS) Serenity shuts the door
behind her. The two naked slaves
turn to face her.

This is a porn film.

Yeah. One woman's sexual coming of
age fulfilling her sexual potential
through multiple partners —

sometimes multiple
multiple partners.

(SIGHS)

It's a bit hard to be a born-again
virgin when you're on film being
taken every which way to Sunday.

So do you wanna tell Hayden
the bad news, or shall I?

I've gotta get to class.

Hello.

Oh, hi.

I was wondering if there was
anything I could bring this evening.

A blindfold.

Are you OK?

Yeah. I've gotta set up for this
next class. I'm doing this new
Brooke Fraser routine.

It should be really...

Where's the stereo?

Why did you come round the back?

Oh, uh, there was no parks
round the front, eh.

Let's get those bloody trousers.

Yeah.

(LAUGHS)

(LAUGHS)

Yeow!

CAR ALARM BEEPS

OMINOUS MUSIC

Gimme the keys.

(GRUNTS) Oh, shit, woman. What are
you doing? You wanna cause a scene?

Whatever happened to, 'Hi, Cheryl,
how are you? How's the big empty
f*cking house, then?'

Shut up, will you?
Beg your f*cking pardon?!

Shh.

TYRES SQUEAL

This is lovely, isn't it (!)
I thought you'd pissed off the
face of the earth,

but, what, you've decided to
abduct me for old times' sake?

You having a party?

What's it to you what I
get from the supermarket?

Stay the hell away from me
and give me back my keys.

Did you see the will?
Was that meant to make it all OK?!

It's all yours — you and the kids.

Brandon is your kid as well. I don't
see how cutting him out will make it
all OK.

It sure doesn't make up for all the
years of deception and betrayal!

You can f*ckin' talk there!

You know he slept with your daughter
— your precious princess?

What?
Brandon and Pascalle.

Oh, Jesus f*cking Christ.

(SIGHS)

She's doing all right now.

She's doing pretty good, actually.
She's got a good job, nice boyfriend
— almost too nice.

I never meant for this to happen.

Don't pretend your d*ck just
fell out of your trousers.

I was around at Sparky's,
all right? I was pissed.

You were bloody tired and
busy with the kids all— ]

It's my fault?!

No. I'm not saying that.

I tried to tell you a million times.

I was too scared shitless of
what would happen if I did.

I made a mistake.

People do.

(SIGHS) The way I see it,
we're quits.

What's more important than what
we've done wrong is what we've got.

Whatever it was, it's all gone.
You really believe that?

Yeah, Wolf. It's gone.
It left when you ran out.

We could start again.
We could move to Brisbane.

What?
People do it all the time.
Place is full of Kiwis.

Are you serious about this?

You could sell your knickers there.
Aussie's full of rude sheilas.

At the place I've got, there's
tons of room for the kids.

The place? You bought a house?

Well, I had a bit of
money lying around.

Stolen money.

Nobody's missing it, Cheryl.

What are you gonna do with this
brand new life, Wolf? A desk job?

Jesus, when are you gonna get off
this moral-high-ground bullshit?

It's not bullshit.
It's how I wanna live my life.

It's not you, Cheryl.
It never will be.

You've got a fire in your guts
that you're never gonna put out,

no matter what you do,
I do or anybody does.

Mm!

No. No. I can't do this.

Can't or won't?

It's not me any more.

This is you.

This is us.

He can't compete with this.

Jesus, this is about him.

No. No.

It's about you.

It's about you.
It's always been about you.

Come with me.

WHISPERS: No.

No.

OK. Whatever happens next,
remember, it's down to you.

Jesus, Wolf, you're not gonna try—

f*ck no. I've got far
too much to live for.

You give my love to my kids.

I will.

Take care of yourself.

(SNIFFS)

CAR ENGINE STARTS

CONTEMPLATIVE MUSIC

KNOCK AT DOOR ]

Hey.

Congratulations.

Thanks a lot, Eric.
I'll put it with the others.

I was gonna get something more in
the furnishings line, but it didn't
work out for me last time.

Yeah. No, thanks anyway.

You're wearing a skirt.

You haven't got your tits out.

PEOPLE CHATTER
Oh, so this is the sprog, eh?

Yeah. Little Stevie.

Isn't he gorgeous?

A little Stevie Ray Vaughan, eh?
(IMITATES GUITAR CHORDS)

No, no, after Stevie Nicks.

But when he's older and wants to
know who he's named after he'll get
all confused and turn gay.

Hi! ]

Oh, little Stevie. Gidday, mate.

Oh, we didn't know what
to bring the happy couple.

Oh, Jeez, open it. I need a drink.
Oh.

It is second-hand, but it was owned
by these old people. You know, they
took real good care of it.

And it's probably hardly
ever been cranked up, you know?

You are so clever.

(CHUCKLES)

I was gonna get you guys
an engagement present...

...but you didn't get
to the bottle store.

No, I'm saving my money.

I don't care. I love you anyway.

(GASPS) Bruce!

Where's the birthday girl, then?

Grandpa, it's an engagement party.

Gotcha.

Hello, spunk rat. Oh.

Look at you.

Something for your house.

Really?
Made it myself.

Occupational therapy.

Shag On The Mount, I call it.
Thank you.

Pascalle said this was the
traditional gift for your family.

And he won't drink it
because he doesn't drink.

Thanks.

Let's give you the grand tour.
Oh, I'll come.

You already know your way around.

Congrats.

Thank you, Jethro.

Where's the present, man?

Van, I just spent a fortune
on shit for the house.

Tight-ass.
Shut up.

DEAD FLOWERS' 'MIGHT AS
WELL GET USED TO IT' PLAYS

Wondered where you got to. Thought
you might have done a runner at your
own piss-up.

Are you OK?
I have my moments.
Something's come clear, though.

Oh yeah, what's that? (SIGHS)

With all this new furniture, things
are gonna get flash round here.

You're not gonna want
to go home, are you?

Probably.

So don't go home.

Not ever.

Are you sure about that?

I wouldn't say it if
I didn't mean it.

(CHUCKLES)

KNOCK AT DOOR ]
There's someone here to see you.

Can't it wait?
The wife will k*ll me.

I think you'll want to see him.

Gidday. I don't think
we've met. Wolfgang West.

DI Grisham. What can we do for you,
apart from place you under arrest?

I'd like to make a statement.

LOUD MUSIC PLAYS, PEOPLE CHATTER

He bought furniture
for the whole house?
Uh-huh.

And he gave up being
a cop just for you?

Yeah.

I suppose he is kind of cute,
even with the moustache.

If you get sick of him,
can I have him?

Nah.

LOUD MUSIC PLAYS

This one!

Nah, that's girly music.

Well, I'm a girl, aren't I?

Yeah. f*ck, yeah, man.

Hey, I've lost Bruce.
Have you seen him?

Uh-uh.

That is the Janet Frame stereo.

No, no, no, no, it's not.

Are you on duty tonight, sir?
Nah, mate.

(LAUGHS) OK, good. Excuse me.

It-It-It just looks like it.

And how do you know what
that stereo looks like?

Uh, couldn't hear you.
Stereo's too loud.

You have taken a gift of music from
the elderly and infirm people who
already have little to live for,

and that is exactly what I
told the police this afternoon.

You told the cops on us?

Hey, Pascalle, we found Bruce. He's
downstairs doing tequila sh**t.

What?!
Tequila!

So it's not our stereo.

No.
What did you do with the money?

We spent it.
On what?

On a really good deal
on primo heads.

You spent our money on dope?

Yep.

I have only one thing
to say to you, Van West.

Yep.

Where's mine?

(LAUGHS)

Where's mine, bro?

Got some.

Yee-hoo!

You see, in those days, your split
beaver was your actual beaver,
because they had some actual hair.

Bruce.
Now they're all nude down there.

Those Brazilians have got a
lot to answer for. (LAUGHS)

OK, we're going back upstairs.

MEN PROTEST

Pascalle, leave him alone.

I like it down here.

Really?

It's like finding the centre of
your family — raw, unfinished,
but honest.

Did they get you stoned as well?

The more I see of your family, the
more I appreciate how amazing you
are.

You're not totally
disgusted and put off?

I'm a bit pissed. I hope
that doesn't disgust you.

(CHUCKLES)
But if I ever get engaged, I want
a party exactly like this one.

Engaged?

One day, maybe.

Oh, Bruce.

Brucie! Choice! (CHUCKLES)

(SPLUTTERS)

(GIGGLES)

LOUD ROCK MUSIC PLAYS

Loretta.

Did you find Bruce?
Yes, and guess what.

I really don't want to.

I've decided I will
be in your movie.

THE EXPONENTS' 'WHY DOES
LOVE DO THIS TO ME' PLAYS

I told you what was involved.

Yeah, but I won't really be doing
it, will I? I'll be acting.

And if I'm as serious about
Bruce as he is about me,

then I should just look at it as
a noble sacrifice for a cause.

And this way I get to pay for my
operation and leave my old life
behind with a bang,...

well, a series of bangs.

(GASPS) I love this song.

Words fail me.

♪ Jackie came. She went away.

♪ Deep in the valley
I kissed her that day.

♪ But it seems
I'm thinking of you,

♪ but I'm still
thinking about myself.

♪ I don't know...

Happy families, eh?

♪ ...why does love do this to me?

Come on, woman. Out of the kitchen.

♪ Why does love do this to me?

♪ I don't know. I don't know. ♪

GUITAR SOLO PLAYS

MUSIC FADES

Good morning, Mrs West.

Where are you going?

I'm going to get some bacon and
eggs to cook you up a slap-up feed.

Oh, you are an angel.

(SIGHS)

Oh, bugger.

Awesome day, eh.

Awesome.

Jeez, you fullas.

OMINOUS MUSIC

Hey, you guys.

You guys see anyone go into my car?

Wasn't us.
Nah, man.

Something missing?

SIREN WAILS

WOLF: Believe me, I didn't wanna
come down here. Bleating to the cops
isn't exactly my style.

But I didn't have anywhere else to
turn, seeing as how this involves
a very real threat to my family.

FLY MY PRETTIES' 'CATCH THE LIGHT'

Detective Sergeant Judd.

What have you got there?
Why are you here?

We have a warrant to search this
car, this house, your house.

What have you got there?

I found it in the car.

We know what happened, Sergeant.

A while ago there was a robbery.
Don't bother asking me who, when,
where or why. I don't grass.

This is about what happened
after the robbery,

how a certain police officer knew
all about the crime. Oh, shit, he
watched the whole f*ckin' thing.

But did he report the
crime? Like f*ck he did.

Yeah, you know who
I'm talking about.

We know what happened, Sergeant.

It's bullshit.

What's in the envelope, Wayne?

I found it in the car.

Someone just left it there?

Yeah, and you know
who left it there.

Yeah, we do.

[ We have a statement.

What the f*ck's going on?

Wolf.

So I'm out of the picture, right,
on the run, and Sergeant Judd is
screwing my wife.

But is that enough for this prick?
Like f*ck it is. He wants more.

So we meet, not that I've got
much choice in the matter.

He tells me he wants a cut from the
robbery. Judd wants grand. Never
mind that I don't have it.

So I go to my son and he
withdraws it from his account.

I take the money along, hand it over
to Judd like a good little boy.

But is that enough for a corrupt
prick like Wayne Judd?

Oh, no. 'That's just the beginning,'
he says. He wants more.

I tell him I don't have it, but he's
not listening. He's threatening me.

So I'm scared, Mr Grisham, for my
family, my kids, for Cheryl. That's
why I'm here today.

I'd rather go back to prison than
see a corrupt prick like Wayne Judd
walk free.

♪ Catch the light if you can.

♪ Oh, hold it in...

Wayne Judd, you are under arrest...
You can't do this.

...for extortion—

You can't do this. This is crap.

You have the right to remain—

No. Whatever he said to you, it's
bullshit. It's bullshit! He didn't
do anything!

It's OK. We'll sort this out.

WOLF: Whatever happens next,
remember, it's down to you.

He didn't do anything!

HELLO SAILOR'S
'GUTTER BLACK' PLAYS

♪ Lying in the gutter,

♪ I cut the cord from my mother.

♪ She pat me on the head and said,

♪ 'Go to sea, boy.
Get to sea, man.'

MUSIC CONTINUES