My ex-girlfriend once asked me if
I loved her. Do I love her?
Well, let's just say in the course of a 4
year relationship, I brought her a hat
a scarf, a t-shirt and a sweater
We broke up
I let her keep the sweater
Now I know you can not put a price
tag on love...
but that sweater took all my savings
How far should a man go for love?
We'll be right back
Come give me your sweetness
Life with you there is no weakness
Laying safe in your arms, I'm born again
I was without hope until you came in to my life
I got one for you
Oh, you do?
Asi es. You're going to love it
I'm listening
Every body, everybody was Kung-fu fighting
Stop, you are going to wrinkle my clothes
Take them off!
Martin some of us have real jobs
What is that supposed to mean?
That my radio show is not a real job?
I work hard, baby
I do a lot of research
Like, yesterday's show. You said Red Fox is still alive
Babe
Think about it
The man faked it
If you owe $16 billion in taxes,
what would you do?
You don't believe that Martin?
It don't matter what I believe
Look, when I'm on the radio,
we get a little crazy, we get good ratings
but why are you always negative about my show?
Martin is just my opinion
You are just sensitive about everything
No, I'm not
Yes, you are
No, I'm not
Yes, you are
You are but bitter sweet
Like, the other night, we were
watching beauty and the beast
And you cried and it was only a cartoon, honey
You had to understand that little white girl
and that boy was ugly
Only white people can endure that. I'm sorry
But, I was not crying
It's okay to cry
Yes for some people but not me
It's ok. You don't have to cry about it
Look, I gotta go. Chao
You will miss me girl
Come here and give me my sugar
Unless if you wish to get closer, I wouldn't mind
Okay
Okay
One kiss
But first you got to promise me something
What do I have to promise you girl?
Kevin from work got a promotion
and we're having a little party
for him and I want you to come
No, no, don't touch me
I will never, ever spend
another evening with those dry zombies you work for
I always get trapped in a corner with a white guy named Bob
Listen Martin. I just saw a black ghetto movie
I didn't know Martin.
I'm sorry. I won't
And you think your friends are any better?
Most definitely
Like your friend Cole? He doesn't have thumbs
Cole doesn't need thumbs, alright?
He can't count pass eight, babe
You're making me late, chao
Come here girl, give me my sugar
grab my ears
Who is it? (your mom)
Martin I don't want her to know I was here
Don't panic, calm down
She's going to know you were here
Just be cool. Open the door
Hi, Mrs. Payne
My God
It's so hot outside
Mama sweating like Coca Cola bottle at a barbecue
Mom let me get you something to drink
No, momma fine
I just need time to catch my breath, that's all
I just stopped by on my way to work
Oh I know, momma know
Yes I know, you are a good girl
Good clean girl?
Thank you
Have a good show Martin
I'll be listening ok?
Call me later
Ooh, you know, it makes mama feel good
Good to see her son with someone
sweet and warm and beautiful like you
Yes, it does. You should visit more often
You need to watch that girl, I don't trust her
I will marry Gina, as soon
as I can get some money
I just worry so much about
you and out of all my kids, you are my favorite
and you look so much like your father
Can I ask you a question? When I was younger, did I cry a lot?
Yes, like a little lamb
I just stopped by to bring you this record
It's called "We Are The World" it's
by little Michael Jackson, and a
bus load of his friends. Put that on
your show today, mama got to go
I told you it's talk radio. We don't play records
You don't talk back to mama. This record is powerful
It just might make this world
a better place for you and me
Mama's sorry
Now listen, if that girl Gina is
going to be spending the night over here
You make her pay rent. You hear me?
Are you wearing clean and dry underwear?
Hey Martin, you busy
Yo, what's up? man
Getting ready
What's up?
You know how radio signals go out
into the space and travel for years?
Yeah
So right now space aliens are getting
30 five-year-old radio signals
So?
If they decide to come here and att*ck
us when they said, take me to your
leader, they'd still be looking for
Eisenhower and that would really confuse them
You know, for engineer you're
real deep, you went real deep
What did I tell you
about talking to Martin
When he's going on the show
Stan relax
am I talking to you?
No, you were talking to me.
Shut up, Sean.
We know he was, yeah.
Yeah.
Yo boss man, what is wrong with you?
Martin, this is a small radio station.
I am a small businessman.
Look at this phone bill, man.
This phone bill right here.
What are you trying to do?
Bankrupt me?
This was a phone
interview to New York.
with Bill Cosby
That man is as rich as King Tut.
And he couldn't call you?
A new policy now, collect call
interviews only from now on.
Do you understand?
You don't make Bill Cosby
Call you.
Collect call from Eisenhower.
Hello is that marketing
report finished yet?
I'm xeroxing it right now.
Thank you.
He's not xeroxing.
She's talking to her boyfriend
for the 5th time today.
Pam, what is wrong with that?
I think it's nice.
It costs us so much.
Gina.
Don't fool yourself.
He's just checking up on her.
And why would he do that?
Because he's a man. They're
all the same. They're jealous
possessive, and they are all control freaks.
And I date them sometimes.
Martin isn't like that.
Martin is sweet.
He's sensitive.
He respects me and he makes me happy.
Is he b*ating on you?
You are starting to irritate me.
Here's the report.
Oh, thank you, Martin show is starting.
Is it okay if we listen in here?
Oh yeah.
Come on in you girls.
Yo!
This is Martin Payne, today's subject
Male sensitivity.
I think it's the woman's plot to turn men into
house trained suckers, people
we're talking male sensitivity. What Up?
I share everything with my wife.
I even cry in front of her.
Yo man.
I share everything with my wife.
That's beautiful.
Can I ask you a question?
What do you shave your face or your bikini line?
Excuse me?
Stand up, pull down your pants, man.
Look at the front of your underwear.
You're missing a man's flap, girlfriend.
I don't have to take this from you, you dirty son of a...
Listen people.
Why I gotta be all that?
Why I gotta be all that?
Control yourself.
We are trying to have a mature
discussion on male sensitivity,
next caller what up?
You are a joke!
You all talk, if you've even
got a girlfriend, I bet
She's got you wrapped
around her little finger.
Okay.
So let me get this right, darling.
You're female weightlifter, right?
A bodybuilder gladiator, right?
I'm saying you call here going off on me.
True?
Let me tell you a little something about
my girl Gina, she worships the ground I walk on.
If I tell Gina to jump, she will
say how high? I tell her, watch your head.
Because you're going to the moon.
Gina
Don't give me all that backtalk.
Because she knows she got a man.
That can...deliver
Lord, would you be so kind and send me
a man who is sweet and sensitive and
respectful as Martin? because Lord,
he is all that!
I'm going to k*ll him!
What is the use of having a
key to Martin's apartment
If they've never been a decent food
to eat in his house? Yo Tommy check this
out, look at this girl, I've
seen that magazine Cole.
No, no, no.
You ain't seen this girl before.
She's perfect.
She got, she...
What the hell is up with her feet?
Don't tell me, she
got onions, bunions, and corn.
You can make a salad with her feet.
Give me the magazine Cole. I paid $2.95 for this magazine.
They could at least put her a pair of socks on.
See now, you know, you've been looking at those girls too long.
When you start noticing they feet, give it to me.
Show love my man.
Show me some love. Come on.
Thank you for being here for me.
Tommy.
What'd you think, man?
What's up?
What'd you think?
I think Gina is going to hurt you really bad.
Tommy, you know what?
Don't worry.
I got Gina in control.
Alright.
Look, man.
I'm trying to put an end to all
this male sensitivity nonsense.
Oye, oye, oye
Men are dogs.
Okay.
Come on, man.
We all know
that women know this.
They should all accept it and deal with it.
That's what I'm saying.
Let me ask my brothers a question.
You brothers don't cry, do you?
Get outta here with that, man.
You crazy, man.
I've cried.
It was only once
I was only seven years old.
I got my hand caught in the trash compressor
Oh ok you were only seven years old.
Because if you said you were eight
then you are a weak punk.
How you doing?
Look at the little business women.
So you don't think I can steal your man?
Sha-na-nay
What are you talking about?
I heard Martin on the radio.
He was real good.
Real good.
I know you are going to end the relationship
so send him over to my apartment
because I know how to tame that man
I'm not leaving him Sha-na-nay.
I'm just setting some things straight.
Hold on, hold on, hold on
Hold on.
Hey, he is not the suspect
Your man tells you to jump.
You say how high?
You have to be a rocket scientist to figure it out?
Girl, mind your ugly business and go back into your cave.
Oh shut up with your ugly tramp dress
Let me tell you something, alright?
You do not know me.
You do not know me.
I will bust your ass, alright?
You need to get back into your apartment.
Put your shoe back on, she is not worth it.
That's not what your man said to me last night
Let me tell you something light bulb head.
You haven't heard the last of me yet.
I should bust you in your head right now
she is going to hurt you bad.
Martin, can I see you alone in the bedroom, please?
Gina, hold up, hold up, hold up
Who is she?
Trust me, you don't want to know my name right now.
Okay, esta bien
Why is she faking it? because she knows she wants me. True?
You all know that she wants me.
Excuse me?
You are a pathetic little stump of a man
Pam, respect my house
The man was playing with you
Respect my house
You are going to talk about respect?
We heard the show today, Martin
So how did you like it sister soldier?
I thought it was one of my best shows
I would really rather not talk
about this in front of your friends
No, relax, it's okay
I mean, you come storming in here
You got something to say
You can say it here, in
front of me and my friends
What's up?
I want to know why you say you never cried
When I saw you cry three nights ago at beauty and the beast
Can I see you in the room for a minute?
Can I see you in the room for a minute
You are embarrassing me in front of my friends
Yo, babe
I know you're not mad
How dare you embarrass me like that on the radio today?
Gina is my job to talk that way
You know, I don't mean anything bad, babe
Oh, you better not because if you
believe all that macho and
crap, you spat out on the radio show, they
don't respect me or the relationship
Gina
How can you say that?
You know, I respect you then you go out there and tell your friends what's real
Wait a minute, whats real between you and me is none of their business
So what you're saying is that you
respect me in private, but not in public
Gina! It's over Martin!
You're making me laugh. You're going to break up with me
because of what I do on the radio?
No, because of what you do to me on the radio
Gina! Now I'm angry
You don't get it, do you?
This is childish
Gina.
That's okay
If you're going to leave me Gina
Leave!
I'm a man!
I will be fine!
This is childish
I want you to leave!
I don't even know why you're still here
Leave!
Goodbye!
- You won, you won babe
- Gina: I what?
You are not ever, ever going disrespect me like that on the radio again ever?
Never again
Alright
I'm sorry
It's okay
Sorry.
It's okay.
I love you!
I love you too!
Grab my ears
Oh my goodness
I thought you was going to leave me
I can't have that, babe
You got some good stuff
Stop it, let's go outside
Babe, I know it's not the right time
but I was wondering
I'm begging you when we go out there
Can you make it seem like I won?
it's a man thing
It's okay
It's okay
On one condition you come
with me to this office party tonight
Gina, I can't go...
Hey, if I'm going to
play your game, you have to play mine
Gina, I don't want...
Ya ok I'm going to the party
Just let me trick Pam first
If she sees that I surrendered
she's going to get violent
Martin: I love you!
Gina: Yes, I know
And don't let it happen again
Pam, I asked you to respect my house
Gina, get your friend or I will hurt her
Pam, could you wait for me downstairs?
Everything's okay, please
Thank you
Sure! My work here is done
Oye Cole, I think she loves you
Hell yeah, am I right?
Am I right?
Yes, Martin
Because I'm a man and you're a
woman and thats all that needs to be said
Am I right about that?
Girl, I asked you
You call me in an hour
Okay?
You know my number, I have seven of them
Call me
I will call you
Wait, wait, wait excuse me but you don't walk out with my sugar
Thank you, thank you very much, I love you!
Pick me up in an hour, don't forget your tie
and don't be late
My brother. I did not know you had it like that
Yeah I'm the man
Yeah right, but in there she broke you to your knees. No?
only because I told her to
01x01 - Beauty and the Beast
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Series focuses on Martin's romantic relationship with girlfriend Gina, her best friend Pam and escapades with best friends Tommy and Cole.
Series focuses on Martin's romantic relationship with girlfriend Gina, her best friend Pam and escapades with best friends Tommy and Cole.