05x04 - Rick Sells His Sole

[bunniefuu]

[♪♪♪]

♪ Here we are, face to face ♪

♪ A couple of silver spoons ♪

♪ Hopin' to find

We're two of a kind ♪

♪ Making a go

Making it grow ♪

♪ Together

We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ Together

Taking the time each day ♪

♪ To learn all about ♪

♪ Those things

You just can't buy ♪

♪ Two silver spoons together ♪

♪ You and I... ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ You and I... ♪

♪ Together ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ We're gonna find our way ♪

♪ Together ♪

[♪♪♪]

Oh, no.

It's not working.

[MACHINE STOPS]

Gosh, if I stop working,

I hope you don't do that to me.

I'll call the repairman.

No, no,

not so fast, honey.

Oh, no...

What do you mean,

"Oh, no"?

Well, it's just whenever

you try to fix things,

you become...obsessed.

Obsessed!

Isn't that a little strong?

Well, I was gonna say whacko.

Hi, Kate.

What's going on?

[CHUCKLING]

The dishwasher broke

and your father is fixing it.

I don't see

what's so funny.

Dad's a very handy man

to have around.

Well...

Didn't he invent

most of the products

for Eddie Toys?

Yeah, but--

Doesn't that involve

building and developing

complex models

for mass production?

Uh...

Frankly,

I think Dad can do

whatever he sets his mind to.

How much

do you want?

Eleven bucks.

But I'll settle for .

I'm running a little low

this week.

Heh-heh-heh, where have I

heard that before?

Last week,

only then he settled for .

You know what?

Maybe you ought to do

what other kids your age do

when

they're running short.

Ask for

a bigger allowance?

No. Get a job.

A job! Edward,

he's still going to school.

Yeah!

I'm still going to school.

I'm not talking about

a "job" job.

I'm talking just about

a part time job

after school on the weekends.

Well...

You know,

sometimes, son,

I think I've made life

too easy for you, you know.

Haven't really prepared you

for the real world.

[SCOFFS]

Dad, you're not

gonna tell me

how far you had to walk

to school again?

Oh, there's nothing wrong

with that story.

A little long, maybe...

Kate.

Yeah...

I'll tell you what.

Tomorrow,

I'll talk to Personnel,

and see if we can get you

something at Eddie Toys.

But that would be nepotism.

What's nepotism?

Well...showing favoritism

to relatives.

Oh, do you mean when Dad made

you President to the company?

No.

No, son... Uh...

[CLEARS THROAT]

Now, you see, that's

completely different.

See, Kate was qualified.

[CHUCKLES]

She's very, very,

very qualified.

You know, they just opened up a

new fast food store at the mall,

Chicken on a String.

I think that would be

just right for you.

Oh, come on, guys...

I'm not gonna work at a place

where I have to wear

chicken feathers.

Look, if I have to get a job,

I can do much better than that,

thank you very much.

Job's taken, kid.

Are you sure?

Am I sure?

What do I look like?

An idiot?

It's just that

I've been looking every day

for the last week.

That long, huh?

Hey, uh,

wait a minute, uh...

They might be hiring

next door.

At the bikini shop?

No, the shoe store.

Shoe store.

So when I heard you were hiring

I rushed right down,

because this is something

I've always wanted to do.

Really?

You've had experience

in the shoe business?

Are you kidding?

I've been wearing them

for years!

Do you make jokes

like that often?

No, sir. Never!

That was the first time.

I'm sorry.

Good.

Of course

you have references.

References?

Yes,

from your last job.

Someone who can attest

to your qualifications,

your character,

dependability...

Oh. Oh, um...

Well, Edward Stratton.

Stratton... And what

did you do for Mr. Stratton?

I was his son.

I mean,

I am his son.

And he pays you

for this?

No, no, see, he pays me

to take out the trash,

rake the leaves,

wash his car...

I'm sorry, I'm looking for

someone a little older,

someone with more maturity...

experience.

I'll work for

under minimum wage.

You're hired.

[♪♪♪]

[BANGING]

Mornin', Dad.

Hey, son.

Dad?

Huh?

What's the best way

to get a promotion?

Well, in the immortal words

of your grandfather,

"You have to earn it!"

Well, let's say

you've earned it,

but your boss

doesn't notice.

Well, then you gotta take

the bull by the horn,

or in your case,

the shoe horns.

[LAUGHS]

That's 'cause

you work in a...

Dad, come on,

no jokes, okay?

I'm sorry, ahem.

What I meant is, son,

sometimes, you gotta be blunt.

If you want to get a promotion,

you gotta ask for it.

That's right.

And you know

something else?

What?

I'm not only gonna get

that promotion,

I'm gonna demand

a raise.

Yeah, why not?

Yeah!

How much you think

I should ask for?

Well, whatever

his first offer is...

Yeah?

...take it

and say, "thank you."

Thank you.

Hey, that'll show 'im.

Oh! Morning.

RICKY: Morning.

All right!

Finally, I fixed it.

I hope so.

[MACHINE RUNNING]

Ah!

[LAUGHS]

[LAUGHS]

[♪♪♪]

I'm almost finished

with that display.

Where are those As?

Got 'em.

What about the alligators?

There they are.

Not bad, not bad.

Thank you. Uh...sir,

ahem, there's something

I've been meaning to ask you

all morning.

Yes.

Well, when you first

hired me as a stock boy,

you said

it would be temporary,

and eventually you were gonna

move me up to salesman.

So?

So, I was wondering when

"eventually" might be?

I'll get back to you

on that...eventually.

But sir, I'm ready!

I really am!

'Cause I've been

watching you very closely

for the last three weeks.

You're the best.

I've been studying

under the master.

Oh, that's good.

That's very good.

But sir, I'm ready.

I'm serious.

Just give me a chance,

let me show you what I can do.

[STORE DOOR BEEPS]

I'll tell you what.

If you can sell whoever

just walked in the door.

I'll try you out

on the floor.

Oh,

thank you, sir.

You're not gonna

regret this.

Hmm.

Hey, hey...

I had to come downtown

to get this part

for the dishwasher.

Thought you might want to get

something to eat.

Sit!

What?

Sit down

and buy some shoes.

I don't need any shoes.

Yes you do, Dad.

My entire career

is in your hands.

This is for

the salesman's job.

Oh, well, uh...

How nice of you

to ask, well, uh...

What do you,

uh...recommend?

Well-- W-well,

in a casual shoe,

these loafers are

an excellent choice.

Ah.

Great construction,

superb support,

this color

goes with anything.

Well, I'll buy 'em.

Don't you wanna

try 'em on first?

Ah... Good idea.

No, you've very good.

Let me see...

You look like

a and one half, Charley.

Amazing!

Why that's incredible!

Fine young man

you've got there.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Sir, I took the liberty

of bringing out

another pair of shoes.

I thought you might

find them amusing.

[LAUGHS]

Amusing.

See, I was right.

Well, you think of

everything.

Gosh, I can't remember

when I've had a better

salesperson than you.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Let's not lay it on

so thick, okay?

There you go.

Slip it in.

There you go.

Oh, very,

very handsome.

What do you think?

Well...I don't know.

Maybe something

a little sportier--

It's perfect!

Perfect! Ah!

I'll take it. For what it is,

it's perfect, heh, heh.

Yeah.

You won't be sorry,

sir.

Oh...

We're also running a sale

on...slippers.

Hey, I do need some slippers.

I know.

I mean,

every man of distinction

has gotta have a pair

of those slippers.

Well, I'll take 'em.

In fact,

I'll take 'em all.

[CHUCKLES]

Well, it certainly

has been a pleasure

serving a customer

who appreciates quality.

Oh! Thank you.

Look, you're gonna need

some brushes and polish

to go with those loafers...

Odor eaters too. Heh, heh.

Right you are.

Add 'em up.

Maureen, please ring up

this gentleman.

Well, it's been a pleasure

serving you, sir.

Oh, the pleasure

is all mine.

Come back again

and see us.

I certainly will.

And I'll ask for you.

What's your name again?

Rick.

Rick.

Well?

Not bad. Not bad.

So come on,

do I get to sell?

Okay, okay, you can.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you

very much, sir.

Can I have my lunch now?

Why not?

You've earned it. Hey.

Take twenty minutes.

Thank you.

Come on, Dad.

Let's go to--

[CHUCKLES]

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Oh...

look at

my hands.

Don't worry, Honey,

after tonight, you'll never

have to do dishes again.

We're getting paper plates?

Hey, guys, guess what.

EDWARD: What?

Potter gave me a raise.

Oh...

Really?

Yup.

Bumped me up

to minimum wage.

Congratulations.

Especially since you two

almost blew it the other day.

I'm very proud of you,

son.

I think he's gonna promote me

to full-time salesman.

I'll be making more

on commission

than I'm making

on salary.

Terrific!

All right!

I am done!

[EXHALES]

Care to try it?

No, I've already had my shower

this morning.

Rick?

Uh... Sorry, Dad,

I've got things to do.

Suit yourselves.

[MACHINE STARTS]

[LAUGHS SMUGLY]

Oh.

RICKY:

Dad?

Thanks.

Hello. Can I help you?

Yes.

Do you think that these shoes

match my toenail polish?

I'm sorry,

what was that question again?

My toes.

Can you match them?

Oh, your toes!

Oh, absolutely!

Well, do you have these

in a size ?

If I don't,

I'll go make some.

[CHUCKLES]

Rick.

Yes, sir.

I want to talk to you.

Pardon me, sir.

There's something I've been

meaning to talk to you about

for awhile.

Oh... heh, yeah?

Well, we've been getting

busy around here,

so I've decided we could use

a new salesman.

Heh, you're not

gonna be sorry, sir.

Heh. That's why

I hired Jerry.

He's the new salesman?

That's right.

That way, you can go back to

running the stockroom.

You were doing

a terriffic job.

Don't worry. I'll keep you

at minimum wage.

But what about all

the sales commissions?

Oh, yes,

thanks for reminding me.

Would you explain to Jerry how

to figure out his commission.

Good luck, Jerry.

I won't let you down,

Uncle Perry.

Uncle?

[♪♪♪]

You still wanna

fix it yourself?

Oh, come on, Kate,

look at it this way,

if the lights

hadn't gone out,

we'd have never found out

the flashlight doesn't work.

So now what are you

going to do?

Get some new batteries.

No.

About the dishwasher.

Honey, don't worry.

I'll take care of it.

[SLAMS]

Hey, hey, take it easy

on the door, huh.

Yeah, there's only so much

your father can fix.

You didn't get

that salesman's job?

No.

Dad, I was the victim

of nephewtism.

No. That's "nepotism."

No, no, Kate,

this was "nephewtism."

Potter made his nephew

the new salesman.

Ooh, I'd be mad too,

if I were in your shoes.

Please, Kate,

I don't ever, ever

want to hear

the word "shoes."

You know, there is

a bright side to this, son.

What?

Well, this kind of thing

happens all the time

in the real world,

and now, you get a chance

to experience it firsthand.

Huh?

I think what

your father means

is that it's good

for you to find out

that life

is not always fair.

Kate, I found that out when Dad

wouldn't raise my allowance.

So, what are you

gonna do, now?

What do you think I'm gonna do?

I'm gonna quit.

You could do that.

Or--

Dad, is this the "quitters

never win" speech?

No, but if this one doesn't

work, I'll try that one.

Look, Rick, you know,

if you hang in there,

you'll probably get

the next promotion.

How? Dad, I've been demoted

back to the stockroom.

There's bound to be

other opportunities,

and that's what

this game is about,

seizing the opportunity.

He's got a point, Rick.

You gotta be in the right place

at the right time.

Course, if you don't think

you can take it...

Hey, I can take it.

You're sure?

I can take anything

they dish out.

Please. I don't ever, ever,

wanna hear the word "dish."

You missed a spot.

I can't take this.

What was that?

I said, thank you

for pointing it out.

Look, kid, if you don't

like workin--

Jerry...

Yeah.

You see that

woman over there?

Hoo-hoo!

How could I miss her?

That is Mrs. Winslow.

Now,

when I'm at the bank,

you make sure she gets

the A treatment.

Don't worry, Unc.

Her feet are in good hands.

You'd better

shape up, junior.

Mrs. Winslow?

How are you?

I'm Jerry.

Can I be of service to you?

Yes. Thank you.

I'm looking for something

in a sling back.

Sling back...

Right, uh... Yeah.

How about these?

That's a boot.

I knew that.

Just testing.

Uh, do you think you can

pick up a few of these?

Good help is so hard

to find, Mrs. Winslow.

[CHUCKLES]

May I suggest our new snakeskin

in sling back...

it would go great

with your bag.

Snakeskin sling back,

heh-heh!

Yes. That sounds

splendid, young man.

I thought

you'd like that.

If you sit,

I'll take your measurement.

No, that's won't be

necessary.

I'm a perfect

size EEE.

Got that?

Nine EEE.

Right-o, Jer!

JERRY:

Let's move it. Mrs. Winslow

doesn't have all day!

Was that size ?

Yeah, .

Like your IQ.

And get the lead out, huh?

[IMITATING, SARCASTICALLY]

"Get the lead out, huh?"

[IN NORMAL VOICE]

Wait a minute...

first...

I take a size shoes...

and put them in

box.

[CHUCKLES]

Allow me.

Heh.

Whoo!

[CLEARS THROAT]

Uh... This feels

just a little bit snug.

Are you sure you have

the right size?

Uh...yup.

Nine EEE.

but don't worry, Mrs. Winslow,

it's soft leather.

They-- They stretch

to your feet.

Here we go.

Ow! Watch it!

Are you sure

you're a size ?

Not a ?

Oh! Well, I never...

Please, lady, would you

work with me here, huh?

Push! Push!

Aah!

Mrs. Winslow,

are you all right?

Hey,

what about me?

No, I am not

all right.

This is the rudest,

most arrogant,

most obnoxious salesman

I have ever met.

That won't work here,

lady.

I'm family.

You're fired.

What?

Wait, I'm sure

we can work this out.

I just did.

You can have anything

you want in the store.

Oh, Perry.

I'll just take it

out of his last paycheck.

But... But...

Uncle Perry!

[♪♪♪]

[MACHINE RUNNING]

[EXHALES]

[KATE GASPS]

I don't believe it.

Believe,

oh, ye of little faith.

Listen to that baby hum.

Hmm... Music to your ears,

huh?

Yeah.

All fixed.

[KNOB CLICKS]

Did you get a warranty

with the new machine?

Of course.

Well, the store called

this morning.

They wanted to know if someone

would be home for delivery.

Well.

We're only using this

till I get

the other one fixed.

Sure.

[CLEARS THROAT]

[CHUCKLES]

Hey...

Hey, son.

How was work?

I was promoted back

to salesman.

Really?

Congratulations.

Thanks...

Well, see?

You decided to take me up

on my advice

about seizing

the opportunity, huh?

Yeah, I seized the opportunity,

all right.

And you were in the right place

at the right time, right?

Right.

Well, so!

You got your promotion.

Don't you feel great?

Dad,

I got Jerry fired.

You what?

Dad, I got him fired.

I sabotaged him.

How?

It doesn't matter.

I just did.

And I knew what I was doing

when I did it.

But I did it anyway.

And now I feel miserable.

Well, I should think

you would.

So would I.

And now that I've told you two,

I feel much better.

Hold it.

[SIGHS]

Are you gonna give me

another talk?

It's my life.

[♪♪♪]

Well...

I'm all done,

sir.

Could I have

my check now?

Not so fast.

Um-hm.

Um-hm.

Nah-ah-ah-ah-ah!

Oh! Oh, I'll get that.

[SIGHING]

Well...

looks all right.

Thank you, sir.

Sir, there's something

I've got to tell you.

What is it?

It's about what

happened to Jerry.

Yes?

Well, you see,

it wasn't exactly his fault.

What do you mean?

[SIGHS]

The reason he couldn't get

that shoe on Mrs. Winslow

is 'cause I purposely

substituted a smaller size.

You mean you deliberately

got him fired?

You--

You could say that.

I can't tell you

how shocked I am.

I know.

But I must admit,

I find your honesty refreshing.

You do?

It's not every day

you can find an employee

with this kind of integrity.

Well, that's

very, very true.

I must say...

I'm impressed.

Thank you, sir.

Does this mean you'll be

keeping me as a salesman?

Oh, I'd love to,

if it weren't for Myron.

Who's Myron?

Another nephew.

Course, he's not

as likable as Jerry.

How do I get rid of this one?

Drive a stake

through his heart?

[♪♪♪]

Oh...

Come on, work.

[BLENDER BUTTONS CLICKING]

Something wrong?

No, nothing's wrong.

Nothing.

Everything's working

just fine.

No, it isn't.

Keep away.

Kate, give--

Keep away.

Guys, I did it.

I'm a free man.

What are you

talking about?

I quit.

A better-paying job opened up.

This time, I start in sales.

Ah!

That's fantastic!

Well, congratulations!

Where are you working?

KATE:

Yeah?

Anyone for

Chicken on a String?

[ALL LAUGHING]

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]