01x23 - Lanes of Glory/Why So Uptitan?

[bunniefuu]

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ One, two, three! ♪

[Skillsworthy]

Herby, Kirbie, Burt.

It's been one year

since you rescued

my sweet Dumples

and, in honour

of that anniversary,

I would like to present

to you these medals.

-Aw shucks.

-It was nothing.

We will forever

be indebted to you.

[all cheer]

Pfft, finding Dumples

was a complete accident.

They couldn't rescue their

fingers from their own noses.

You there, um,

little cadet,

would you mind

taking our picture?

Um, it's-it's Donnie, sir.

And it would be

my utmost pleasure

to capture this

historic moment.

Okay.

Everyone say phony,

I mean cheese!

Cheese!

You know Lonnie,

you could learn

a thing or two

from these cadets.

Absolutely,

President Skillsworth--

Once again,

great job, Amigonauts!

Assembly dismissed!

Ugh!

If I'm ever going

to get Skillsworthy

to adorn me with medals,

I'm gonna

need to do

something

real special.

[grunting effort]

Donnie, you brilliant

and handsome young man.

No wonder all the girls

are ga ga for you.

[giggles]

Oh, thank you Donnie,

I'm flattered!

Oh, no, thank you. Oh!

[laughs]

[grunting effort]

Help?

Hmm...

what to order.

I'll have a breakfast cookie

and a coff...

Wait!

No. Yes!

Does the Guacamole

Spiced Latte

taste like

real Guacamole Spice?

I'm sorry sweetiekins,

you can squeak all you want,

but you're not

getting any of my--

Dumples!

As soon as Skillsworthy

announces Dumples is missing,

I'll return her

and get the praise

I deserve.

[siren]

Students!

Dumples has gone missing...

again!

I am extremely

concerned.

Oh, why must this

hard working man

and his trusted

canine companion

endure such hardship?

Why, I ask you?

Whoever returns

my beloved pooch

will be generously

rewarded.

And show time.

[maniacal laugh]

Ahh!

Wha?

Where's my backpack?

[gasps]

How did you find her?

Well, I love bubble gum.

He sure does.

Give him ten desks

and he'll be chewing for a week.

And I had

a real hankering.

It was then

that I caught a waft

of my all time favourite...

[fanfare],

Grape Escape!

[sniffs]

[sniffs]

[sighs]

Dumples must have wandered

in there and got stuck.

Uh, who wanders into a bag?

Uh, no offense pal,

but it's happened to you

a coupla times.

True. True.

I can't thank you enough

for finding my luvins,

but free chocolate bars

for life

is a good start.

[all cheer]

What?

Free choc-?

Ugh!

It was just luck

you found her.

Was it luck, Donnie?

Hmm?

[sniffs]

You sure it's safe

for my angel

to be in this

Hot Yoga class?

Namaste, everyone.

It's probably the safest

place for her to be.

Now...

Let's get hot!

Okay and we'll start

with the Dracula.

And now into the Crab.

[panting]

Upside down Eiffel Tower.

And now

the Close Your Eyes pose.

Wow, could've started

with that pose.

Not again!

And three...

two...

[siren]

Students, it seems

that once again...

The Amigonauts

have found my Dumples!

[gasps]

Good thing Dumples

ate that tracking device.

As for ending up

in Donnie's locker...

well...

this dog must love

the way Donnie smells!

Who doesn't?

[sniffs]

[growls]

Excellent, Amigonauts!

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I have to go cry

tears of joy in private.

[cries]

Donnie's bag.

Donnie's locker.

Donnie's bag.

Donnie's locker.

Hmm...

Hmm...

The one with the smallest brain

is on to me.

Time for my

ultimate brain

to come up with

the ultimate scheme!

[maniacal laugh]

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Her soft fur,

the way she steals my pizza

when I'm not looking,

the way she pees

in my slippers every morning.

Oh, I miss her so much!

President Skillsworthy!

I found this note

and it's from the dognapper!

"I have your dog.

Play this video."

I steal dogs for no reason

and I don't ever

give them back.

[giggles]

Now, if someone

were to find this one...

which they won't...

then that would be

the most impressive thing

that has ever happened.

♪ Daddy's boy. ♪

♪ Unhappy-happy-happy-happy

Daddy's boy. ♪

Again! Okay!

♪ Daddy's boy. ♪

♪ Unhappy-happy-happy-happy

Daddy's boy. ♪

Up an octave!

♪ Daddy's boy. ♪

The dognapper...

stole Donnie's camera!

Yes,

that's plausible!

I mean, right.

[awkward laughter]

To Donnie's room!

What are you doing?

If the dognapper

stole your camera,

it means he was

in your room

and may have left a clue.

Or...

Donnie is the dognapper.

Burt, we really

need you to focus.

Oh, uh, guys,

I have an idea

where this extremely

intelligent

and probably very handsome

dognapper might be.

Uh, why don't you just

stay here and, you know,

waste your time -

I mean, look for clues!

Let's tear this place apart!

Get in the bucket,

Dumples, it's time to go.

Come on, Dumples.

Be a good girl

and get in the bucket.

[farts]

I promise I'll let you

pee in Herby's locker...

on his sweaters!

Fine, I'll just [sniff]

Oh...

oh that's disgusting.

Oh, I'm feeling...

I'm feeling faint...

Oh, come on!

Oh, great.

Well, it's a good thing that

I am an expert rope climber.

[grunting efforts]

Upper body strength--agh!

Uh oh.

I was so good at hiding

this ridiculous dog

that no one will ever find me!

We don't have any water.

Food!

Panic setting in!

[gasp]

Something is

down here with us.

Protect me Dumples!

I can't believe we forgot

about the tracking device.

We've gotta get to Dumples

before he farts it out!

[barking]

Help!

Help! Save me!

I mean us!

Stay strong, Donnie!

We'll be right down!

Donnie's not

the dognapper.

How could I be so wrong?

Hold on, Donnie!

We've gotcha!

Burt!

I'm okay.

I don't think

the dognapper is,

but I'm okay.

Well, don't just stand

there and watch -

get us out of here!

Donnie,

I want to thank you

for locating Dumples...

but it is the Amigonauts

who not only

saved my dear angel,

but saved a student too.

Aw shucks.

It was nothing.

Please, accept this statue

I carved out of marble

with my bare hands

as a token

of my appreciation.

Let's go

get you some medals!

[pained grunt]

It cost many lives,

but this ship,

The Obliterator,

was finally defeated.

Then Commander Evil

was sealed in Gotcha-Goo,

where he has remained

for over one hundred years.

That's one creepy

looking dude.

Yeah, super creep.

But, this place

is pretty cool!

Sir?

Yes, was there any

attempt to rehabilitate

Commander Evil

through therapy,

Gregorian chants, electroshock,

massage, anything?

No point, Kirbie.

He was always evil

and was always going to be evil.

So he was never

given a chance?

Colonel...

anyone can change.

Pfft.

When do we get to fire

the ships weapons?

The weapons system

is offline.

Don't worry, Sir,

I'll figure out how

to get it working again!

Weapons!

I order you

not to touch anything!

Did you hear me?

[student] They're gonna

go for the weapons!

[all cheering]

No one wants to be evil.

I wonder

what happened to you.

Or try the one

below that.

Oh, no-no-no-no!

Maybe the big one up there!

Ahh!

[screams]

That's it!

Tour's over!

Everyone back to the bus...

Now!

Staring contest

in three, two, one.

Kirbie, keep watch,

you're the judge.

Seven, eight...

Agh!

Atten-tion!

Anyone who is not here

please raise your hand

or you will

be left behind.

No one?

Wonderful.

Guys?

Where'd you go?

Hmmm...

[gasp]

A toy box!

Toy owners aren't evil.

No head.

No head.

No head.

Yikes!

I hope he didn't pay

full price for these.

Hey!

They forgot me!

Oh, well.

I'm sure

they'll be back

as soon as Herby and Burt

notice I'm missing.

This ship's so dark

and depressing.

Guess Commander Evil never took

an interior decorating course.

[gasp]

But, I did!

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[Kirbie]

Hmm, well, who doesn't look evil

when lit from below?

[ominous music]

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I can't believe they aren't

back to pick me up yet.

[rumbles]

I wonder if any of these buttons

serves a breakfast.

[alarm]

[computer voice]

Poisonous gas.

[screams]

[buzzer]

Phew!

No thank you.

Maybe this one?

[computer voice]

Commander Evil's Video Diary.

Ooh!

This might provide

some insight.

Today, I shall crush

the Planet of Garthoria

from existence!

Obliterated!

Also, the following

forty-two planets--

Who names a planet

'ShoobyGoob'?

Okay, okay,

I get it.

You blew up

a lot of planets.

Now tell me something

I don't know about you.

And kittens seem nice while

you're playing with them

then whamo,

they scratch you!

I have had it with chips.

Death to chips!

Ugh, chips!

Whoa.

Who hates chips?

[Commander Evil]

I hate everything.

Gah!

You're alive?

Yes.

Thanks to you.

As a reward, I will consider

not annihilating you.

Not annihilate me?

That's so sweet!

I knew you weren't

such a bad guy.

I like kittens too,

by the way.

And just like that

I've changed my mind.

You will now be

snuffed from existence!

Eek!

[struggling]

Here I...

You're gonna get it now...

Argh!

Kidding!

I was totally joshing you.

You should've

seen your face.

Absolute terror.

So funny.

Terrorizing

is never funny!

That's what got you frozen

in the first place.

Yes.

I suppose it is.

Lucky for you,

Therapist Kirbie is here

to find your inner smile.

All you need to do

is open up to me.

Help me, help you.

Hmmm, alright,

as long as you'll

help me, help me.

I'm not sure

what that is--

Let's use the reward system.

Every time I answer

one of your questions,

you reward me

by illuminating another

festive light on that panel.

It's so hard to heal

in the dark.

How about starting

with a freebie?

The one on the right.

Hmm.

That sounds fair.

Yes.

And I so hope you can get

to the root of my anger.

I want to be really,

really happy.

Don't you worry, Mr. Evil.

We're going to

figure this out together.

[mechanical whirring]

[snoring]

Ah-ha-ha!

You blinked!

You blinked!

No, you blinked first!

I saw you!

Kirbie, who won?

Kirbie?

Where's Kirbie?

Last time I saw her

was on...

[gasp]

That is not an honest answer.

No one's favourite

flavour is "revenge".

Now, take this seriously

or I'm not flicking on

anymore pretty lights for you.

No, no!

Not that one!

The one on the left!

The left!

[gasp]

That's you!

Aww and you're happy!

No!

Turn it off.

I don't want to see him!

Tell me everything.

I'm listening.

When I was a boy,

hugging

was forbidden in my home.

But on my seventh birthday

I took all the allowance

I'd saved up...

And bought myself

an octopus stuffy.

His tag said

"My name is Arm-y

and I have

eight arms

to hug you with".

But, he was a liar!

His arms just dangled!

I never experienced

the feeling of a loving embrace!

I learned there

was only one truth: pain.

So I became the greatest

spreader of that truth:

one expl*si*n at a time!

Commander Evil,

that... was...

a breakthrough.

[phone rings]

Is that a land line?

You are so old school.

Remind me

to get your number.

Hello?

Evil Command Centre.

Kirbie!

Are you okay?

I'm fine.

And Commander Evil's therapy

is going very well.

What? He's alive?

Cool.

Run, Kirbie, run!

Hide!

We're coming to save you!

Okay.

Nice and easy.

We don't wanna set off

any alarms on the way--

[sirens]

Intruders!

Stop right there,

Commander Evil!

He's not evil anymore!

I fixed him.

Then why is his weapons

systems powered up?

Wait, what?

His what is what?

Whoa.

It's really him!

What are you doing?

I thought we were

making progress,

that you were

going to be happy?

Oh, I will be.

Once I destroy you,

your friends

and wherever it is

that you're from.

I can't let you do that!

[growls]

[screams]

You'll be okay,

Herby, it's ju--

Freezing.

And surprisingly painful.

Hang on

Mister-pretend-not-to-be-evil

but-is-still-evil-Evil!

After everything

I did for you,

you hurt my friends,

planned to destroy

my planet...

you lied to me!

I'm evil.

People can not change.

Oh. Yes.

They. Can!

Eeyah!

I was nice!

And happy!

And now I'm not!

[maniacal laughter]

Didn't wanna be loved?

I'll show you!

[battle cry]

[sighs]

I'll change...

I'll change!

[sigh]

Love.

Way more powerful

than any evil.

Come on, let's go home.

I don't respect you,

but I respect your game.

[buzzes]

[sinister music]

♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪

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♪ Three! ♪