01x10 - Game Over

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Scare PewDiePie". Aired: February 10 – April 6, 2016.*
PewDiePie encounters terrifying situations and sets inspired by his favorite survival horror video games he previously played on his YouTube channel. (Thanks for the shout-out PewDiePie! We appreciate it!! :))
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01x10 - Game Over

Post by bunniefuu »

- Ahh!

[yelling in Swedish]

I'm not having this!

[haunting music]

♪ ♪

[upbeat pop music]

♪ ♪

How's it going, bros?

- PewDiePie.
- PewDiePie.

- PewDiePie.
- PewDiePie.

- Are you gonna let me do it?

Do you want to sit here
and do it?

- Oh!
- [laughs]

- Yeah.
- Okay. Give me that.

- No.
- Give me that liquor.

- No.
- Don't joke around about that.

- What is that?
- You want some?

- Nah.
- I can get you a cup.

- I'll get some later.

- I'm gonna get you a cup.

- So, um, Felix,

he's been drinking all day.

- Good.

- No, not good.
- That's great.

- He's not supposed to drink.

- Why not? It's a party.
- No, no, no.

Let's just say he's been to
-step meetings

for a long time.

- Oh, sh*t.

- So, um, I want to get this
before Kevin comes back.

What I need just from you
is, like,

an end of the series wrap-up.

Like, "Well, there you go, bros.

As you can see,
I've been through a lot"--

- What, are you gonna
start without me?

You assh*le.
[laughs]

- Oh, is that
what you're drinking?

- Yeah.

- I think I'll wait until
I have a little bit of food.

But thank you.
- You assh*le. You f*cking--

- No, I was giving--
- f*ck you.

- So, Felix, did he show you
what he brought today?

- No.
- Hey, Jeff. Show him. Show him.

- Oh, what?
- Oh, jeez.

I'm not looking at him.
This is f*cked up.

No, put that away, Jeff.

- Nothing's gonna go down, Jeff.
You can put that away.

I know this is America and all,

but that's f*cked up.

- All right, Felix.
- Yes.

- Okay, let's just
get this started.

Um...

Um...

Uh, just say--
you know what?

Start with "What I just
experienced was crazy, insane."

You know, "I was--
I was," uh, um...

- Okay, all right.
I'll just do something.

Okay.

I just had the weirdest weeks
of my life.

What the f*ck?

I collected alien eggs,

I went on a spaceship that was
infested with maggots.


Ah! They're real!

Ahh! This--
- What?

- What the f*ck?

I was chased by a little girl

in a creepy haunted house.

Hello? Little girl?

Are you okay?

Ahh!

Bloody hell. f*ck that sh*t.

I ended up at my own funeral.

What the f*ck is this?

Why am I here?

Okay.

Let me out!

I had to play
real-life Operation.


For this thing.

Ugh.

[electricity crackles]
Ahh! Ahh!

Are you f*cking kidding me?

In the hotel I was chased
by a chainsaw guy.


That's f*cked up.

f*ck you!

f*ck.
[chainsaw revving]

f*ck this!
f*ck this!

Ahh!

- Collected alien eggs.

- I kind of--
- We already covered all this.

We covered all this.
- Oh, we--what?

- I feel like we done this.
- We already talked about this.

I--that's why
I was under the impression

that I was gonna do
the interview, but if you're--

- Damon, how about you do it,
then?

- Okay.
- [spits]

- What the f*ck is wrong--
what are you doing?

- What the f--
- What happened?

Did he spit at you?

- All over my arm.
- Why did he spit at you?

Is he okay?
- He's wasted.

He's been drinking since : .

- [laughs]
- Okay.

- So as I was saying,

in that f*cking hallway

I had to dig through
those disgusting maggots.


This is so f*cking gross.

[gags]

Where's the f*cking key?

This is f*cking--
f*ck me.

That arcade was creepy as hell.

Remember when I got att*cked
in the ball pit?


Oh, what the f*ck?

What the sh*t?

Okay. I just need the token!

What the f*ck is--

[squealing]

The insane asylum
was super f*cked up.


Oh, what the sh*t?

Okay.
- [screaming]

- f*ck this. f*ck this.
f*ck this.

f*ck this.

Where the f*ck do I go?

I don't think I ever run
so fast in my life.


I gonna go here.

Until the m*llitary thing.

I had to run through w*r.

[alarm blares]
sh*t.

- They triggered the explosions.
Run!


Run! Run!

- Ahh!

The m*llitary game was insane.

Pretty much,
I got sh*t at the entire time.


Oh!

Ow!

Ahh! Ahh.

The craziest thing
was during the last one.


- You need to be punished.

- I did not sign up for this.

- Naughty boy!
Bark like a dog!

- I can't believe that girl
whipped me so much.


It fricking hurt too.

Woof! Ahh!
- Bark like a dog! Bark!

- Bananas!

I'm just glad
I made it out alive.

That's it for me for now,

but as always...

Jeff, do you want to kiss it?

- Sure.
- No, you shouldn't.

You really shouldn't.
[laughs]

I'm sorry.
Um...

Let me redo that.
[laughs]

I didn't think you'd say yes.

Okay.
[laughs]

All right,
that's it for me for now,

and as always,

stay awesome, bros.

[mimics expl*si*n]

[upbeat music]

- Yo, yo, yo.
What's up, everybody?

Whoa! PewDiePie's in the house!

- And Jeff!

- Say hello to PewDiePie.

- How's it going?

[applause]

How's it going?

- Doing good. How are you?
- Good.

- Hey. Felix.

Have we met?

- Not yet. I'm arts department.
- Oh, cool.

- Paul.
- Nice to meet you, Paul.

- Pleasure.

- Who did the chair?
That was really cool.

They built, like,
this custom wheelchair...


Mr. Chair, what are you doing?

That, like, goes back,
kind of like a horse, goes up.


Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

- Were you surprised
to see the Smosh guys?

- They were wearing masks.

Anthony kept licking through
the mask, like...


With his tiny, little thing.
I'm like...

- Did you know?
- No, I had no idea.

- No idea.

Sitting on this green thing.

Are you gonna spit on me?

- What?
- Are you gonna spit on me now?

No, I'm just kidding. I'm just--

- How many times
has he scared you?

- Oh, sh*t. We need, like,
a montage of that.

- [Damon screaming]

- What?

[Damon screaming]

- Why?

What is that weird mix?

- It's whiskey.

- Why do you drink from
a plastic bottle?

- Well, I don't know.
I don't have, like, a--

- Kevin?

- We only got beer or wine.

Why don't you go get us
some drinks?

- I don't want to say I think
he's had enough to drink,

so I won't.

[upbeat music]

All right, everybody,
thanks for coming out.

We have a couple people
here tonight

that want to say a few words.

Rachel, the EP from Skybound.

[cheers and applause]

Here's Rachel.

- Hi, everybody.

Thank you all so, so, so much
for being here tonight

and being with us through
the whole show.

Uh, thank you guys for making
this show possible.

It's been an absolute blast.

Okay, I'm gonna pass the mic
to Felix,

the man of the hour,
to say a few words.

[cheers and applause]

Come on!

- Wow.

No one told me
I was gonna be on stage today.

Kevin! No! This is my moment!

- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait!

I have something for you.

[applause]

That's for you.

[cheers and applause]

- Timmy!

- We all know what that is.

- For those of you
that don't know, this is Timmy.

Timmy has been my rock
throughout this whole thing.

Kevin has lied to me.
Damon has lied to me.

This whole thing,
Rachel has lied,

but let me tell you,
Timmy here never lies.

[soft piano music]

♪ ♪

- Before you start--
before you start,

I just want to say...
- Okay.

- Um, uh...

Um...

This has been--
[stammers]

I just wanted--

I-I feel like some of the time
during t-the--

the three weeks with you,

in a van--hey,
where's my van crew?

How many hours
did we stay in the van?

- Too many?
- Too many.

Shut the f*ck up.

Um...
And, uh...

And I just want to say,
it's been--

it's--this road has been tough,

and, um...

And it's like, I mean, it's just
hard in this world, you know.

I mean, you, um...

When you try and people
don't have your back,

and--
for Feli--

Felix,
you're awesome.

- Thank you.

- We're juggling so many balls

and we're dropping them,

and...

- It's okay, dude.
- And I just--

No, it's okay.
- Stop it.

- All right,
uh, yes.

- Jeff--
- Enough.

- Okay.
Give it up for Kevin.

Uh, Kevin has been really
awesome through this show.

Really working hard.

When I signed up for this show,

I was like, "Holy sh*t.
Why did I do this?

"This is a bad idea.

I regret this so much."

I had, like, anxiety for weeks.

But it's been, uh, really,
really, really fun

and I love--

What the f*ck?

- Lights!
- Lights.

- Is Kevin doing something
with it?

I don't know what I'm saying.
[blow lands]

Oh, what the sh*t?

- Felix! Felix!
I'm here! I'm here!

I told you I would find you.

- Give me the crowbar.

- Jeff. Jeff.

- What the hell are you doing?
- Oh, f*ck you.

Listen to me. Felix--
- Give me the g*dd*mn crowbar!

[shouting]

- Please do something.

- Felix--

Felix, Felix,
listen to me.

Listen to me.

Felix, you're the love
of my life.

I came here to marry you.

- I-I'm sorry.
I can see that.

- Nikki, shut up!
- No, don't you--

Oh, shut up, Kevin!
You're such a bag of dicks!

- Get out of here! Now!

- f*ck you!
- Get out of here!

Shut the f*ck up!

Don't move any further!

- How'd he get it?

- You think I'm scared of you?

You're such a f*cking p*ssy.

- This is f*cked up.

- Don't move any further.

- Don't tell me what to do.

[dramatic music]

[g*nsh*t]

♪ ♪

- [slow-motion, distorted]
What the f*ck?

[g*nsh*t]

♪ ♪

[g*nshots]

[screaming]

- Kevin, what the--

[squealing]

- Can someone check on her?

- This is, like,
the job of my life.


- [laughs]

- You have the best hair
I've ever seen.


You're perfect.
You're like a unicorn.


I love you!

This will not be the end!

- Drop the g*n.
- Drop that g*n!

g*n! Put it there!

Step away from it now!

Is there a doctor in the house?

- Yeah, I'm a doctor.
I'm a doctor.

There's no heartbeat.

God, she's--she's dead.

- That's not a doctor.
That--you're--

that's my patient!

- Get away from me.
- Come here.

- Get away from me, Doctor.
I'm not going back!

You read my brain!
- Security!

- Jeff, do your security!

- Calm down!
- Easy.

- Calm down!

[grunting]

- What the sh*t?

- Is there a real doctor
in the house?

- I'm a doctor.
- Dr. Winters.

- Get out of the way.
Get out of the way.

I have a pulse!
I need a nurse!

- Dr. Winters, I'm here.

I'm in.
- Good. Okay.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- I'm not going anywhere.

- No--

- Because I'm fine.

[laughter]

[laughs]
And I'm an actress.

[cheers and applause]

- This is what we've been
putting Felix through

for the last three weeks.
Right?

- Yeah, this is the only time
you'll acknowledge the bullshit.

[laughter]

- This is Nikki.

- I was so sure
that you were a fan,

and, like, you started off
with, like...

And I'm like,
"That's kind of weird."

She kept doing hearts,
and I'm like--

Yeah, no, Marzia's very upset
at you.

- Who is that? Who is that?

- The crazy doctor
who spoke Swedish to me.

- Remember, The Walking Dead,
he was one of the zombies.

[screaming]

That was you?
- [low moaning]

- What? Oh, sh*t! That's you!

Yes!

You remember this guy?
- What the hell?

I'm like,
"That guy's hand is huge!

He has to be a police."

- He's an ex-cop, but he--
- Oh, you are.

- He's also an actor.
- Holy sh*t.

- Cathy, why don't you
come out here?

- The nurse who made me snot
in her hands.

- I don't want to be
the Texas Ebola nurse.

Come on! Hurry! Hurry!
- Okay. Okay.

No, no, please.
- Old times' sake.

Come on.
- Why did you make me do that?

- Remember this guy?
- Oh, sh*t.

You tased someone, didn't you?

- Close your eyes.

- Yeah!

Hey, sneaky snake.
Hello, sneaky snake.

- Oh, sh*t!

[Felix screaming]
- Come on, little piggy!

- Yes.

You were so scary.

I kept running. I never saw you.

I feel like I'm upset.

- Jeff our security guard...

- Not Jeff, guys.

- He's an actor.
- No.

Come here, Jeff.

If there's anyone
I want a hug from, it's Jeff.

- Here's the scariest part.

Damon is actually himself
and he's not an actor.

He's just that way.

- What?

What?
- Felix!

- Yeah! Okay.
All right.

- We--we've been lying to you
for the last three weeks

and you--we've told you
some things

and lied about other things,

but there's one person
who is responsible.

Um, who's that?

- It's you.

- What's my name?

Unfortunately, that is also...
- No!

- A lie.

[laughter]

- Come on.

- That man there has been in...
- Really?

- Every situation, every day.

That is the executive producer
Kevin Healey.

- What's your real name?

- My name--I'm an actor.

Uh, it's Dave Storrs.

Um...

I'm a low-level actor.

[laughter]

I'm not really drunk.

All the lies stop now.

- I don't believe that, but--

you can say that all you want,
but--

[applause]

- So and now I think you should
just say,

"let's get the party started,"

so we can really party for real.

- Please, can we get
the party started?

[upbeat music]

Yes!

♪ ♪

This whole show has been
a wild experience.


It's been insane.

It's been a journey
of a lifetime.


It was the craziest thing
I have ever been in,


but it was a lot of fun.

I hope everyone
enjoyed watching.


And as always,

stay awesome.

Ahh!

Bloody hell. f*ck that--

- Jeff, I want you pitch
your app to Felix.

- I microwave popcorn

and sometimes it's too much time
and it burns

and other times
it's not enough.

You could put in
the model number--

- So you know exactly how
to cook the popcorn.

You're gonna be rich.
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