02x21 - The Dressing

[bunniefuu]

Yeezzz!

Ugh! What do we do with this?

There can be only one!

Nice.

♪ My name is Shake zula ♪

♪ the Mike ruler ♪

♪ the old-schooler ♪

♪ you want to trip, I'll bring it to ya ♪

♪ Frylock and I'm on top, rock you like a cop ♪

♪ Meatwad, you're up next with your knock-knock ♪

♪ Meatwad make the money, see ♪

♪ Meatwad get the honeys, g ♪

♪ drivin' in my car, livin' like a star ♪

♪ ice on my fingers and my toes and I'm a Taurus ♪

♪ uh, check-check it, yeah ♪

♪ 'cause we are the aqua teens ♪

♪ make the homeys say ho and the girlies want to scream ♪

♪ 'cause we are the aqua teens ♪

♪ make the homeys say ho and the girlies want to scream ♪

Aqua teen hunger force.

Number one in the 'hood, g.

Hey, Carl.

Is that all you came to say?

Are we, uh, we done here?

I don't know. I don't think so.

Well, then, what?

What do you mean?

Oh, sh**t, I knew I was gonna forget this.

I got a note here. Someone wrote me a note.

Hang on.

This says, uh,

"start salmon hatchery in Carl's pool."

Okey-dokey. Where are the fish eggs?

No, no, no! Get back here!

H-Hang on. Here we go.

Oh, wait. That ain't a note.

That's a toy. Here it is.

"Invite Carl to eat Thanksgiving dinner."

Well, isn't that sweet?

Too bad it was over a week ago.

Don't matter. We're doing it today.

We don't usually celebrate. We ain't American...Yet.

Till we pass that dumb test.

That test is a bitch.

Whoa! What you got over there?

It smells, uh, edible.

Well, it's a traditional Thanksgiving spread.

We got a bunch of tacos we mushed up with a hammer,

pour crackers on top-- that's called "taco pie."

What, you got a bird over there?

Hell, yeah! Bird is the word!

Well, all right!

Just, you know, give me a sec.

Let me adjust myself.

Oh, yeah.

We got 'em. Let's go.

Carl is gonna join us, right?

Yep. But he says

he'd rather take his food out on the lawn,

where there are witnesses.

Oh, well, all right. I think we're ready.

Uh, Shake?

You wanna lead us in a blessing before you eat?

Or do you wanna just make a pig out of yourself right now?

I know, but it's a r*cist holiday!

I stand in line with my martian brothers

and celebrate casino...Ness.

So that we could enjoy the--ooh!

Is that whipped--

hand me that whipped cream!

Fine. I'll do the prayer.

Carl! Bow your head out there!

Hey! Toss me a roll!

Lord, we give thanks for this food

we're about to receive, for the--

excuse me. Little help?

Ahem.

Could I have the tacos, please?

...this bounty of tacos.

Could you pass the tacos?

Could you pass me the tacos?

Could you pass me the tacos?!

Here! Ok, then.

This roll is wet! Sorry.

Ahem. Please go on.

For the fellowship we have with our--

hey, hey, whoa, wait. What's a fellowship?

It's a gay bar down on ninth!

Aren't you glad we're thanking the lord

for a nautically-themed gay bar?

For the fellowship we have with our neighbor Carl!

No, do not rope me into this.

The lord does not need to know that I'm here.

Please help us to be-- amen!

Ok, who's gonna whittle this Turkey?

Out of the way!

I will ruin this bird with my anger!

Drop the chain saw if you want him to live.

Help me.

Uhh!

I call on the dark meat!

Shotgun!

Shake, put that damn chain saw down! Give it here!

But I did call "shotgun."

That's better.

Uh, can we get you to lower our neighbor now?

I mean, he didn't do anything to you.

Yet.

Aah!

I knew something wasn't normal!

I'm not letting it ride this time!

Freakin' robot Turkey! I knew something was up!

Is he mad?

No, don't worry about him.

He's always got his butt trapped around something.

Now, Frylock is gonna want to know who you're after,

and then he'll say something like,

"oh my god," or something. He's so predictable!

Now, who the hell are you?

I am turk-a-tron.

I have been sent here from the year

to save this bird that lies before you.

For he is the great-great-

great-great-grandfather of gobblox,

the Turkey that's destined to lead the rebellion

against master chickens.

Well, I mean, that's fine. We won't eat him,

but, I mean, look at him.

He's dead. He's dead?

He's been in our oven for hours at degrees.

Why, that's impossible!

Look at him!

He's dead!

Do you know who gobblox is?

I will tell you who gobblox is.

In the year , a race of deformed Turkey

was genetically developed by chicken scientists as revenge

against his bird brother.

These turkeys would exit the womb doused in gravy.

Gravy filled with the giblets from a monkey.

The French craved it, and as a result,

Turkey became the only food source for France,

which is now called "robofrance ."

I was later k*lled by the chickens!

So, of course, you can see why I'm angry at those chickens.

Uh Huh.

You know, you sound very familiar to me.

Of course, I do.

Months and months ago, I came upon your neighbor

taking the form of the cybernetic ghost

of Christmas past from the future.

But I didn't realize he was an agent...

A chicken in disguise.

Sent from the year ... Sent from the year ...

? From there.

They had evolved big time.

From beyond feathers, their beaks had softened,

and they had acquired synthetic intelligence

and appendages from the chicken black market

from beyond the moon!

Are you serious? Carl? Next-door Carl?

Is a hyper-evolved chicken from the future?

What? You are?

He is. He ain't right!

I knew that.

And that is why I had to return and erase his mind.

And my mind as well.

I had to be reformulated by rogue chicken scientists

for the rebellion.

They crafted my sleek Turkey body which allowed

for safe passage through the time rift.

So, in summation, the bird comes with me.

Dead or alive.

Well, you don't have a choice, dude.

He's dead. I told you that.

I must take the bird into the time rift,

to a time before he was cooked.

All right.

I'm waiting for the time rift to open.

It could be anywhere at any time.

Ok, well, you don't mind if we eat, right...

While you wait?

Oh, yes, of course. Sure.

Is that a taco pie?

Mm-hmm.

Taco pie!

I added food coloring.

'Cause it's a holiday, but it turned black,

'cause I added all the food coloring I had.

And I ate this butter straight out of the tub

'cause it tastes good.

There's a reason behind everything.

Enjoy those tacos now.

For in a thousand years, they will be illegal.

Ha ha ha! Think we all know why.

We know why!

Anti-taco legislation.

Disestablishmentarianism.

Woo! That's a good story.

Hey, why don't you sit down

while you're, you know--whoa!

Mmm. This is pretty good.

You know, I really like the flow of this place.

It screams "party."

You know...

That last bite reminds me of this severely long story

about how the chickens became a master race

through a freak accident involving radiation,

and interestingly enough to me, marshmallow.

Psst! Yo! Yo! Come here! Come here!

Is that the same guy?

Yeah, I think so. He's crazy!

I think he's really from the year !

I think so, too.

Did you hear his story?

I heard it. And it checks out.

It is solid.

Yeah, Shake. In the future,

they all carry their belongings in a plastic bag.

That is a future bag.

I say that with all confidence.

Hmm, these tube socks ought to be washed.

What has he got a bar of soap in here for?

You're a freaking robot!

Excuse me? Those are weapons!

They are all laser-guided,

and I get crazy if you touch them!

Now, where was I? Oh, yes.

It was a hundred years

after the tacos were assassinated, and I was--

I thought they was illegal. Was they dead or illegal?

Oh, is this your story now?

Does this happen to you and not to me?

Well, listen up, everybody!

He's about to tell his amazing story!

The one that happened to me and not him.

I-I'm sorry. You--you got it.

Are you sure I have it?

Are you sure that since it happened to me,

I should be the one to tell it?

Oh, well, then, yes, I thought I did.

Pass me more wine.

I shall require it to finish.

Do you want some?

Not now.

See this thing here?

We had a major run-in...

During the conflict of mechanical advantage .

Yeah, just guzzle it down. Who cares, right?

Damn you, Billy! Dammit!

I--you thought you had my mind under your control,

but now who's strapped to a wall,

enslaved by the chickens, huh?

You...are strapped... To the wall, man!

Hey! Wait! Come on! Give me a break, will ya?

Hey, down in front, do you mind?

I'm not! And who is now? You are, d*ck!

Whoa! Hey!

That--the time rift!

Is that a time rift over there?

No, that--that's a curtain.

Move.

Hey, uh, are you all right?

Get out of the time rift!

You have no idea where this will send you!

Ok, ok, man, look.

Hey, say, you wanna lie down in the back

for a little while

while you're waiting for your rift?

Yeah, you wanna lie down because I hit you in the face?

He's out. Hurry!

Fine, I am not... Spinning.

Don't touch me!

You son of a--

ok, I think that's got it!

Check him for weapons!

These socks here are laser-guided.

Be gentle with those.

And this toothbrush does something, too.

It cleans my teeth!

The chickens polluted my gums with plaque...

What are you doing? Get out of my mind!

There we go.

Hey, y'all! Gobble gobble! I'm Tom Turkey!

Do the hustle!

Look! Look at this!

Well, that explains it.

Robot Turkey toy recall.

Not that!

Down here! The picture! Look!

What, a pantyhose ad?

You better believe it!

It says here they made--

give me that! It's mine!

It says here they made , of those things.

Seriously? , of that chick?

No. , hustlin' Tom turkeys!

Oh, no!

Hello? Oh, wow!

We are here for--

next door, next door, people!

Right next door!

Oh, I'm sorry. Thank you.

You have got to be frickin' kidding me.

What are you eating?

This is your great-great-great-, uh...

Your mama!

♪Hard like g, quick like t ♪

♪ cap him in the eye and hit him in the knee ♪

♪ I drive big cars, and I make big cash ♪

♪ I like dope girls with the big, fat ass ♪

♪ Turkey shrine, just like g ♪

♪ Turkey shrine you can't...With me... ♪