01x11 - Dumber Days

[bunniefuu]

Dr. Weird: Yes!

Yes, Terry!

Mining for brains!

Ha ha ha!

Hey, uh, who was that on the phone?

Uh, no one.

Hey, let's highlight your hair!

But I like my hair this color.

It begins!

Whoa!

Hey, Frylock, get out here

and watch what I'm doing. Whoa!

What are you doing?

What are you doing? Will you shut up

and do what I tell you?

Oh, hey, Meatwad.

You have a little something sticking--

is that one of your bones?!

No. That's a rotisserie chicken.

You see, I took my brain out to Polish it,

and then I forgot where it was,

and then I just sort of

started putting this chicken in there,

you know what I mean?

The brain is an important learning tool,

Meatwad.

Where is it?

I'll pop it back in if you can find it...Dad.

No way! I'm using this brain

for undercover aquatic training.

Hey, my brain!

That's right, your brain!

But I found it.

Let me see that. Gimme!

Well, I'll be damned. You got a toy brain.

What?! Then where have I been keeping all my knowledge?

What knowledge?

There ain't nothing in there

but air and a little jingle bell.

That ain't no jingle bell.

That is a gland full of knowledge.

No, that's a jingle bell.

It looks like a cat toy.

sh**t, I'm so dumb as hell.

I'll never get hired in today's fast-paced world.

I'm gonna go to my room

and just wait for my body to die.

Aw, come on, Meatwad, you can't be that dumb.

What? Is this not my room?

What do you think?

Yes.

Oh, damn. Maybe Meatwad is that dumb.

Meatwad, you been standing

in that doorway for days.

You're letting all the cool air out.

If you say so. I don't know no better.

I don't have the proper organ

to make those kinds of decisions.

Decisions? Meatwad, look,

why don't you go outside and run around a little, huh?

Outside of what?

Time and place are a mystery to me.

I don't have a brain.

We got to get him out of that doorway

and start making him feel better about himself.

You're right.

I'll go get the hose. We'll flood him out.

What are you doing, fryman?

Oh, hey, Carl.

I'm just measuring the circumference

of your skull. Oh, yeah.

You doing some sort of science thing, eh?

Why are you doing it?

Because I need to, uh...

I'm making you a sweater...Carl.

See ya.

No, no, no, no. Wait a minute, fryman!

If I wasn't a little loaded right now,

I'd say you're, uh, looking for, uh--

come closer here--

looking for a brain, is that right?

A brain? No. No, I'm not.

Why?

Hey, it's Carl here, your buddy.

You don't have to lie to me,

'cause if it's a brain you want,

I'll get you a brain.

Really?

Oh, yeah, yeah! No trouble.

Let me just, uh, get another beer

and give Terry a call. He does tons of stuff.

He's kind of a Jack of all, uh...

Black market organs.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Is this affiliated

with a hospital or a donor clinic?

Does it need to be smart?

'Cause those are kind of hard to come by.

You got to be smarter than them

to get it--

halves from different brains?

You know what, Carl,

just forget it. It's ok.

No! It's no trouble, really.

I went to high school with this guy,

but, uh, this thing he's doing here is sort of,

you know, frowned upon by the community.

Carl, I don't want it.

And I'd appreciate it

if you'd get off my lawn, too, ok.

Fryman, don't be that way. Come on.

This happens every day.

People just don't, you know, talk about it this loud.

I'm drunk.

Hey, what's in it for me?

Are you sure that this is a brain?

Oh, yeah. You can tell. Here, watch.

Now you hear that swarming?

That's how you know it's on.

You just got to kick-start

the smartness here.

You'll see. Now get it going.

Come on. Get the knowledge going!

Hey, wait a second, this ain't no brain!

This a damn bee's nest!

Aw, sh**t! You're right!

Why, oh-ho, this is a bee's nest.

Hey, I've been ripped off here.

I'll say. You might want to talk

to a customer service rep about that.

Damn it!

You know, I think I threw away the box.

Could you just keep it in your head

until I can return it?

Do you think I'm that stupid

just because I don't have a brain?

Yes.

Now go ahead and pop her in there.

Shake, what are you doing?

He's doing it. He loves it. He wants it.

Hey, who's here?

Ohh! Who's ringing the doorbell?!

Will you get them to stop?!

Carl? Oh, my god! Is this the brain?!

Yeah, that's the, uh, soda pops

we talked about earlier there--

shut up. You want to get us k*lled?

Hey, give me one of them sodas.

Uh, this isn't soda pop, Meatwad. I'm afraid...

This is your new brain.

All right! Surgery!

So you're gonna put me under or what?

Oh, yeah, sure. Uh, look over there.

That's the anesthesia.

Where? Ow.

We're done here.

Dang, really? That was kind of fast.

You didn't just sort of

throw it in there, did you?

Yeah, I did. Is it working?

I don't know. Where's the TV?

We'll test it on some wrestling.

Wait a minute, Meatwad. Let's try this instead.

A book?! No, sir.

Shake says that books are from the devil

and that TV is twice as fast.

Twice as fast at what?

Information.

Look, just give this a chance, ok?

"The tiniest bullfrog."

There, I'm done.

Now, come on now. Wrestling's on.

Hang on, Meatwad. There's a little more.

Oh, wait. You got to open it now?

When did they start doing this?

"Jeremy the bullfrog lived in a tiny swamp

"on the edge of town.

"Every day, he dreamed

"of one day playing professional basketball,

"but he lived in a swamp

"far away from the city lights

of a major market team."

Boy, the new brain

is really working out for Meatwad.

You know, that is so good to hear.

Hey, maybe he can use his brain

to figure out a way to drain the venom

out of all my horribly painful bee welts,

because I was supposed to get a head sh*t

at : today,

and now it's never gonna happen!

Well, I'm off to the library to do some recreational reading.

Well, I have some Hardy boys adventures.

You want to take a look at those?

Thank you.

I'm seeking some more challenging fare, Frylock,

something in nuclear bionics.

You know, I thought the wolfman

had a book like that down in our crawlspace.

Hey, why don't you go down

and trade something for it?

I know he's fond of blood.

You know, Shake, your words of terror

amuse only yourself.

Are you sure about that?

Yes.

Yeah...uh, yeah, well...

Dracula called, and he's coming over tonight

for you, and I said ok.

Revenge is a dish best served cold, Shake.

You think about that if you have the brains.

Heh heh heh!

You're getting it tonight.

Shake, Meatwad seem a little different to you?

Yeah, he looks bigger.

I hope he sat on those bees.

Yo. Tizzime passed by just like Donovan mcnizzabb.

Yeah.

One look

at niels bohr's atomic model

makes it abundantly clear

that there is a way

to pass through solid matter.

So in summation,

we could have our daily tea party

in the fifth dimension.

Knock-knock. Well, I hope i'm--

oh, my god!

Frylock, what a pleasant surprise.

I'm just finishing up my symposium.

You've met my colleagues,

professor Vanessa and Dr. Dewl.

Yeah. What happened to your body, man?!

Well, it's obvious, isn't it?

Thermal expansion.

No, it's not thermal expansion.

I know what thermal expansion is.

Ok, fine. I'm sure that you do.

Let's see, how can I explain this

without blowing your mind?

Oh, yes, please, dumb it down for me.

Heisenberg's uncertainty principle

tells us that at a specific curvature of space,

knowledge can be transferred into energy...

Heisenberg's uncert--

or, and this is key now, matter.

No, it does not!

Well, some people struggle with Heisenberg.

Look, here's a toy.

It goes up and down on a string.

Doesn't that look like fun?

Get that thing out of my face!

Why don't you go take that into the other room

while the adults

are doing important research here.

Oh. Oh, I'm sorry, professor.

I didn't realize that knowledge

could also transform you into an arrogant ass!

Hmph. sh**t.

"Passing through solid mat--"

you can't pass through solid matter.

Hey, try to chase me.

Shake.

Chase me! You're it!

Oh, my goodness. Come on.

How did you do that?

You're it! Come on!

Come on. You're it!

You know you want to play this game.

What are you doing with that eggbeater?

Ha ha ha! Uh, let me clue you in.

This is an antimatter eliminator.

It allows me to fluctuate--

you're it! You got to chase me!

Did Meatwad make that for you?

Stop talking. Come on! Ooh.

First off, we made it together.

You know, I put the number on it,

so it's like a race car.

And just where is Dr. Meatwad right now?

Frylock, you stay away from him.

We got a business deal going, see.

What kind of business deal?

Look at that, huh?

Oh, my. That's impossible.

See, I get % of whatever comes out of that,

and I ain't got to do nothing.

So who's got the brains now, huh?

Quiet! I need complete concentration

or the child will die.

Meatwad, what are you doing?

Making me some damn money.

Isn't this a waste of brain power--

I mean, lifting cars?

You could be curing disease

or solving global problems.

The only problem I see, Jack,

is you standing in the way

of me and my financial superbrain.

Your superbrain, huh?

Ow!

I just took your old toy brain and decorated it

with some glitter and macaroni, that's all.

Really? How was I able to lift cars

and pass through walls?

It was all a case

of mind over matter, Meatwad.

Now that I don't have a brain,

I don't even know what that means.

It means you better put that brain back

right now!

So, Meatwad,

what have you learned from all this?

I ain't never gonna be rich.

Wait, we'll be rich.

Don't listen to him. Here's a brain.

Look, it's better.

It's made out of metal. Here, put this in.

I thought that was

an antimatter eliminator.

You're right. Give it back. I'll be the rich one.

Rich! Get out of my way!

Yeah, that was just an eggbeater.

Come on, Meatwad.

Let's go make some popcorn

and watch some wrestling.

Ohh, do not tell me

that that is my car up there on the roof!

Ok, we won't.

Get it down! Wait, no, don't--

damn it!

Oh, Carl, here's that brain back.

Turns out we didn't need it after all.

Shh! What are you talking about, eh?

I didn't give you no brain.

You're crazy, man!

Yeah, you did.

It's right here in this cooler, remember?

Just shut up!

It looks kind of purple. Where did you get it?

Say, Dr. Weird, how do my highlights look?

Uh, Dr. Weird?

Hey, a note.

Hmm...

Why can't I read this?