04x04 - The Tale of Cutter's Treasure

[bunniefuu]

[Child's laughter]

Tonight's a special night.

Normally, when we meet
around this fire

to tell our tales,

each one of us has our own
special brand of terror.

Some of us tell
stories of adventure.

Others have tales
of the macabre and grotesque.

Some tell stories
about real people

trapped in
an unreal world,

or heroes
searching for the truth.

No stories are alike.

That's because
no of us are alike.

That's why of us are
telling the story tonight.

You're kidding? Why?

Because it's so major it
needs the best of both of us.

It's got magic...

And mayhem.

It's about an evil
power so strong...

That it survived
for centuries,

waiting to rise up
and spread its terror.

Excellent.

What are we waiting for?

Your honor.

Submitted for the approval
of the Midnight Society,

we call this story...

I use this dagger

in the name of all who fell
to your sword, you devil.

Heh heh heh heh.

Hello, Ian.

I warn you,
others will come.

Let them.

I enjoy
slicing in ,

filthy traitors
like yourself!

Too much innocent blood has
been spilled for this treasure.

And there will be more!

I plan to guard my treasure
until the day I die,

Ian Keegan.

Longer, if need be.

A curse upon you,
Jonas Cutter.

May this treasure
never bring

a moment's peace
to your greedy soul!

And may your death...

Be a bloody one.

Aaahhh!

Arrgghh! Come back
here, you scurvy dog!

I'll run ya through!

[Laughter]

So, you want to come
over tonight and uh...

Watch TV
or something?

Sure.
Sounds like fun.

Oh, oh!

Arrgghh!

Victory!

Max, you little...

I'm going home.

Sandy, wait!

You are dead, toe jam!

Rush, Max, come on.
We're out of here!

I'll handle you later.

Here's the check
for Mrs. Gregory.

Oh, Mom, we don't need
a baby sitter.

I'm old enough
to handle things.

Oh, really?

Aren't you the guy
who just said

you are dead, toe jam?

It's only for
a couple of days.

Now be good,

and wish us luck.

miles a day,
we're gonna need it.

Bye.

See ya.

Mrs. Gregory
smells like fish.

Yeah, well, she's not
stinking up my weekend.

[Lowering voice]
Mrs. Gregory?

Down here.

Mr. Keegan,
is that you?

Uh, yes.

I'm sorry,
but we decided

not to go away
this weekend.

Oh!

Yes. Uh--the
boys are sick.

Oh, well I'm very good
at taking care of...

They've got
the measles.

Of course, we'll
pay you anyway.

Oh, thank you.

I--I hope they feel
better soon.

Yes!

We're alone
the whole weekend.

What are
we gonna do first?

We're not
doing anything.

I thought we were a team.

We were a team.

You just got cut.

Come on.

You said if I helped you,

I could do
whatever I want.

You can.

Go over to Tony's.

Stay up all night!
I don't care.

Just keep out
of my face.

You cheated.
I'm telling Mom

you made me lie
to Mrs. Gregory.

You do,
and you're dead.

Yeah? How are
you gonna stop me?

OK, worm,

what do you want?

I just want to
do something together.

Forget it.

What else do you want?

There is something.

This ad came in
the mail yesterday.

A magic set?

Get me that set, and
I'll leave you alone

all weekend.

This formula is very old,

and very powerful.

A single drop of
passion potion and...

[Bubbling sound]

Look out!

Perhaps I added
too much ginseng.

Uh--I don't really
need a love potion.

Hey!

Surely there must be something
I can interest you in.

Perhaps a flask
of popularity potion.

No, thanks. I gotta
get home and...

What's that?

Oh, that.

Forget it.

But I do have some
wonderful crystals...

You get a prize
just for opening it?

Don't waste your time.

I've tried everything.

It doesn't open!

Now, have you seen
our vomit?

Uh--Mr. Sardo?

That's Sardo!

No mister.
Accent on the...

You--you opened it.

I'm shocked, amazed!

I'm rich.

What's the big deal?

The man who gave me
this chest

said if anyone
could open it,

he would give me
dol...

dolls. I'm a
collector, you see.

So what do I get
for opening it?

It's all part
of the deal.

Whoever opens it
gets to keep

what's in the chest.

That's it?

I didn't say it was
a very good prize.

Rip. Keep it.

Wait! You have
to take it!

But it's garbage!

And it's busted.

What am I gonna do
with a busted spy glass?

Here. Maybe
you can fix it.

Cool! Thanks.

What do you mean?
It's not busted.

[Doorbell rings]

Go away.

Hi.

I'm really glad
you came over tonight.

Me, too.

Do you want
something to eat?

No, thanks.

My parents are on
a bike trip all weekend.

Far, far away.

Yeah, you told me.

I don't suppose there's any
chance we could make out?

This thing is weird!

It was moving by itself.

Don't be strange.

Were you guys
gonna kiss?

I'm telling you,
it's busted.

It's not.

It was spinning around,
I swear!

Look,
I'll make you a deal.

You go upstairs,
leave us alone,

and I won't
make you eat this!

How's that?

That's a good deal.
Good night.

Night, Max.

He's cute.

A Teddy bear is cute.

Max is a festering sore.

Now, where were we?

Maybe I am hungry.

Ah!

What is your problem?

Why are you
sneaking up on me?

I'm not. I'm just
getting some cds.

Rush.

So, you want to
listen to some music?

Or do you want to...

[Door shuts]

Heh heh heh!

Aaaahhh!

Heh heh heh heh!

Help, Rush!

Heeeeellp!

Help, Rush!

Help!

Rush, help!

Help, Rush!

Now what?!

I'd better go.

No, no, no.
I'll be right back.

Help, Rush, help!

What is your problem?

Oh, man, Rush,
there's a skeleton!

It's dragging me under
the bed! Look! Look!

You're not
gonna get me.

No way.

I'm not lying.
It was a skeleton!

It must have come in
through the window!

Oh, man.

Sandy.

We've gotta call the
cops or something!

Look, you little snot!

I'm tired of you
messing things up!

But the spy glass!

I don't care!

I don't care about
your stories!

I don't care about
your problems!

I don't care about you.

I hate you!
Get out of my life!

Hello?

[Whisper]
Yes?

Who's there?

[Whispering sounds]

Ah!

It is you.
You're the one.

Who are you?

What he wants is not
what he desires.

What?

What he wants is not
what he desires.

Do not be fooled.

[Door moves]

Remember me words.

I'm waiting for
the battle, lad.

Are you
a match for me?

Ahhhh!

What?

Mr. Sardo!

Mr.Ssardo!

That's Sardo!

No mister.
Accent on the O.

You, you're back!

Perfect!

Now kindly take the rest of
this stuff so I can collect...

No! Keep it!
I don't want it.

Wait!
What about my $ ?

Let him go.

But you said he had
to take all of....

The items belong
to him now.

He's just not ready
to accept them.

The boy will be back.

And when he returns,

send him to me.

Hello?

Max?!

Max!

[Door slams]

Max?

Where are you,
you little...

[Door slams]

Max!

Max!

Max!

Max!

Come on, Max,
answer me!

What are you doing?

My father's gonna
be here any second.

Look, pal!

Heh heh heh heh!

Your father ain't here.

And I've come
for the boy.

Heh heh heh heh!

Come on.
We've gotta call the cops!

Heh heh heh!

No use in running.

I got you now.

Heh heh heh heh!

Did you really think
you had a chance

against me, son?

Who--who are you?

Mr. Noise!

After all these years, you're
nothing more than a young pup.

So be it then.

Aaggghh, come, lad.

Max?

Leave my brother alone!

Take a good look,
skipper!

It'll be for
the last time.

Heh heh heh heh!

You should have known,
skipper!

I always win

'cause I make up the rules!

Heh heh heh!

Max!

Max! Max!

[Thunder]

I think we're gonna
get dumped on.

Talk fast.
What happened next?

Rush could only think
of one thing to do.

So he decided...

[Thunder]

It'll pass.
Keep going!

I'm sorry, guys.
We gotta finish next time.

Oh, man!

The story was
just taking off!