07x06 - The Tale of Highway 13

[bunniefuu]

[waves]

[swings creaking]

[shutter banging]

[child laughing]

[footsteps]

[flame sizzling]

This is getting
like, disgusting.

That's the beauty of it!

We never have to clean.

Ahhhhh!

See!
It's infested!

It's just Jerry.

Jerry?

Vange's pet rat.

He's a mouse!

He's a rodent!
Get him out of here.

Stop, you guys!
You're hurting his feelings.

Sorry guys, the
chain broke on my bike.

Or should I say,
Gary's old bike.

Piece of junk.

Just once I'd wish I
didn't get a a hand-me-down.

Oh..that's something
you didn't get new.

I know what a hand-me-down is!

Well that's sort of
what my story's about.

See, if you're getting
something second hand,

you're gettin' something
that's already got a history.

It's used, it's worn,
it might even be busted.

Yeah, tell me about it.

It's like gettin'
somebody else's troubles.

But now they're YOUR troubles.

In my story, a couple
of guys take on

somebody else's troubles...

and they've gotta
deal with 'em...

cuz if they don't, they might
not live long enough to ever get

another hand-me-down again.

Submitted for the approval
of the Midnight Society,

I call this story...

Justin was the kind of guy
you could always trust...

no matter what.

Just great.

Craig, on the other hand,
was kind of a wild guy,

and that usually
meant trouble for Justin.

But they were best
buds since kindergarten,

and when you've been
friends that long,

you put up with a lot.

Justin!
Buddy!!

You save me a slice?

My Mother's gonna be ticked.

Where did you go?

Sorry. I was just over talking
to Ronnie at the Shop'N'Drop.

Ronnie? MY Ronnie??
Why were you talking to her?

Why not?

Because you know I...

Because you're too chicken
to ask her out yourself.

Ah...I can't believe this!

I lend you my car so you strand
me here to put the moves

on the girl I want to ask out.

What kind of friend are you?

The best you got.

Huh...ahhh!

I...I kinda got too close to the
drive-thru window at Winky's.

My Mom's gonna k*ll me.

No sweat okay.

Just, when you pull into
the garage park real close

to the wall; she'll
never notice.

That's great, Craig.

Good plan.

Okay look, don't get
all crampy on me alright?

Tomorrow we'll go down to the
junkyard and we'll get you

a new mirror okay?.

Hey, come on let
me see that smile.

Come on.

Just... great.

And here we go!

Ahh...
It's a ' .

So?

My mom will know.

It's her car, a ' .

The mirrors are more
rounder than the ' 's.

Man, someone must have been
flying to get wrecked this bad.

I mean, you can almost
hear the smashing metal

and the breaking glass
and crunching...

Yeah, I get the picture.

You're no fun!

Hey, let's find the
nastiest wreck here.

Don't be sick.
We're here to find a mirror.

My mom's gonna k*ll me
-She's gonna k*ll you, I know.

I don't know why you hang
onto that geek-mobile anyways.

It gets me from here to there.

Yeah, but you need a ride
that makes a statement,

something with power.

A car like, like -

This one?

Yeah.
Now that was a car.

It still is.

You never heard a
prettier engine man.

It's a wreck!

Just a little dirt
and rust, that's all.

Purrs like a kitten.

A DANGEROUS kitten.

Sweet.

Yeah it's great.

Listen can we go back-

Unbelievable!
How can a wreck sound so good?

The owner of this place has no
idea what great shape it's in.

A smart guy could
get it for a song.

So why don't YOU buy it?

Ah, I've had a couple
tickets, nothing serious,

in a zone.

Bottom line, I got
my license yanked.

How come the door doesn't work?

You're a funny guy.
I like you. I do.

But this baby ain't
for you, you know.

But you...

YOU, Ace, I can see
behind that wheel.

Yeah. Me too.

Wait, I-

You and your friend could fix
it up. A little sanding,

a coat of paint,
it's gonna shine like new.

Yeah, we could, couldn't we?

What's this "we" thing?

You know what?

I'm gonna buy it!

I don't believe this!

It's cool.

Now you go talk to the owner.

And he's gonna
practically give it away.

Aren't you comin'?

No, I'm gonna hang back.

He sees me, he might
get suspicious

and jack up the price.

Alright!

What about my mirror!?

Hey, what's goin' on?

Do you work here?

Yeah...
Thought I heard an engine.

You did, that one.

That one?!

My crazy friend's gonna buy it.

But I'm looking for
a side view mirror,

a ' , not a ' , the
' are more rounded.

He-llo!
A little help here?

Yeah, sure, let's take a look.

Ah!
Now that is one sweet ride.

I have to admit...
it's pretty nice.

Nice job!

Hey!

From the junkyard, right?

Found a ' mirror.

Yes!
Finally!

You're a lifesaver!

Now I can stop
parking against a wall.

You really fixed her up.

Yeah, it was a
boat load of work,

but man, it's worth it.

I'm gonna take
her out for a spin!

I can't wait!

Ahhhhhhhhh!!

I think my Mom just
found my report card.

That drive's gonna have
to wait. Later!

Hey, thanks for
bringing this out.

How much do I owe you?

It's on the house.

Really?
Thanks!

Hey!

I thought you were grounded.

I am, but the warden's
at work so I thought

I'd take her for spin.

It's not even registered!

So I'll just take her around
the block. You wanna come?

Forget it.

Okay.

Maybe I'll huh..

take her over to
the Shop N' Drop.

To show Ronnie?

Maybe.

You're a piece of
work, you know?

Just part of my charm.

Ah!
Let's roll.

Let's use our seat belts.

Oh man!
Is this great or what?

Hey, slow down,
it's gettin' foggy.

[static]

Man, great car, lousy radio.

Lose the surfer music.

[steel guitar music]

Hey, when did they fix that up?

Let's check it out.

Whoa.
Blast from the past.

Not very popular.

Ace!
You made it!

Hey!
You work here?

I do a lot of things.

How did you know we were coming?

Hey, big guy!

These boys are driving now.

Is that right?

If you're, huh, talking about
the monster V- out there,

yeah, we're driving.

You, huh, you got a
problem with that?

Only if you get in my way.

I know!
Let's leave!

Yeah, get back on the road.

Okay, look pal...

Craig, come on!
We're going!

See you out on Highway .

Hey, nice threads, dude.

Huh, do they sell men's
clothing where you got those?

Can't you see when
we're headed for trouble?

That guy was all mouth.

Yeah, but it was
really scary mouth.

Just...
chill, okay?!

Something strange
is going on here.

I mean this place was a
deserted wreck yesterday.

Let's just get in the car
and go home. Alright?

Yeah, alright, alright.

Ahhh...I must have
missed the turn.

Highway .

Huh, didn't the Trucker guy
say something about Highway ?

[horn honking]

Uh oh.

He's just trying
to scare us.

I'll lose him on the curves.

He's doing a pretty good job
at this "scaring us" thing.

Relax.
He's too big to keep up.

Hang on there's a
turnoff comin' up right...

Here!

Youhou!
Haha!

Piece of cake.

Let's go home, alright?

Yeah, okay. This comes out
right behind the school.

We'll be home in just...

Woaa?

What the...

How did THAT happen?

Scared yet?

What are you
doing back here Ace?

That Trucker is after us!

Emergency doesn't answer.

We...huh, try the operator.

That ain't gonna work.

Told you.

What's going on?

It's no big deal, Ace.
Just a little contest.

All you gotta do is b*at him
to the bridge on Highway .

What?
Why?

You shouldn't have
brought them into this.

Hey, someone's gotta
get us outta here.

This is wrong.
They didn't know.

Know what???

Okay, here's the deal.

My buddy had the sweetest
muscle car on the road,

but he never let
it out, you know?

Until one day...

One day Bulldog here
got this Trucker mad

and next thing we know...

Next thing we know, he's
trying to run us off the road.

Sounds familiar.
-Yeah.

We ended up on Highway ,
and there's this bridge,

a tiny little thing, it's
not wide enough for two cars.

We ended up racing for it.

We didn't have a choice.
It was us or him.

Side by side, headed
towards the bridge...

I kept telling Tony
to punch it, but...

I was scared, alright?

We coulda b*at him.
You choked.

What happened?

Wham!

We hit the bridge
at the same time.

Whoo!
What a crash!

Messy, too.

Didn't you guys get hurt?

Hurt?

No we all...
d*ed!

WHAT???

It happened in .

We've been racing the
same guy ever since,

every day, same time,
same thing always happens.

Boom.

So you guys are like... like...

Dead.
Like two sorry doornails.

We need somebody
to b*at that guy.

And I figured
you're the man, Ace.

All you gotta do is
race him to the bridge,

b*at him, and we
can all go home.

The back door!

[horn honking]

You can't run away, Ace.

The car is yours now.

And he's gonna keep coming
back until you race him.

I'm sorry, man.
I really am.

I got you into this and
I'm gonna get you out.

It's okay, we're
not going to race.

You gotta.
There's no other way.

Okay, check the phone again.

But...
-Just do it!

Craig!

Gentlemen, start your engines.

Craig, don't!

Alright, which
way is that bridge?

You gotta get to the bridge.

Straight ahead, Ace.

Straight ahead, Ace.

Straight ahead.

Keep dodging,
don't let him past!

Knock it off!
I'm trying to drive.

I told you not to
let him pull even!

Give it more!
You got it, don't waste it!

There's the bridge!

I got it!
I got it!

Come on, give it more!

Come on, let's go!

Faster, that's it, come on.

Yeahhh!

Yeehaa!

I knew we'd b*at that guy!

The second I saw him I
knew he could be taken.

Wait a minute this
race was YOUR idea?

It was ALL his idea!

He went after the
Trucker, he made me

chase it, he challenged him.

It wasn't the
Trucker's fault, it was ours!

Ahhhhhaaa!

We got him now!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING???

Wooohhh!

You blew it!

You could've b*at him.

Yeah, but you never should
have raced in the first place.

Either way it's over... ACE.

I don't believe it!

All these years and we lost!!!

You had the guts to
do what I couldn't.

Thanks.

So, huh, you want your car back?

She is sweet, isn't she.

Yeah, a little TOO sweet.

Hey, hey, hey,
whe...where you going?

As far away from
here as possible.

Hey, don't be sore.

It's cool.

What happened?

I lost...

it was great.

[horn honking]

Woa...

Last thing I wanted was a race.

Yeah, we know that now.

Thanks for lettin' me get home.

So it was the two guy's fault?

Yeah.

I can't imagine anybody
being so irresponsible.

There's something
I didn't tell you.

What's that?

I was talking to
Ronnie about YOU.

She thinks you're cute...

Really?
You think she'd go out with me?

Now that you'd have to
figure out on your own.

Aw, c'mon!

I need guidance!

You need guidance?

So before you
take a hand-me-down,

make sure you know what
you're really getting.

The end.

Awesome.
-That was great!

It was a good story.

Wasn't that great?

I think I have a
hand-me- down too.

You THINK?

Yeah.

I think my mother gave
me her fear of mice.

But I want to deal with it so...

Can I hold Jerry?

Uhhh, sure...
just be careful.

Ahhh!

Oh, it's actually kinda cute.
I'm okay!

Cool.

Hi!

Then meet mom.
-Ahhhhhh!

(laughs)

That's one hand-me-down
she's never gettin' rid of!