03x17 - Joker

[bunniefuu]

[GEN] Ha-ha! You came for me!

Senku and the g*ng's all here!

Get me off this wild ride!

Ha-ha! We're sailing straight

into the heart of the enemy!

You're kidding me!

[SENKU]

Nope.

We're going on a rampage

to slow down Ibara.

The statue retrieval team

needs some time,

so it's up to us to buy them

every millisecond that we can.

Huh?! There's only

nine of us, though!

And we're up against hundreds

of hardened soldiers!

Your plan's a bust!

[IBARA gasps]

[laughing]

It looks like our futile

fight's already begun!

[MAGMA laughing]

[MAGMA yells]

[MAGMA laughs]

It's sort of ironic, huh?

Everyone waxed philosophical

about the gravity of

reinventing the g*n,

and was convinced

we wouldn't use it

to claim the lives of others.

Time to die, Ibara!

[ALL gasp]

[ISLANDER D]

They're messing up the boat!

[ISLANDER E]

How many sorcerers are there?

Those lofty ideals were sh*t out

of the sky within mere seconds.

Ruining plans is pretty much

the only thing he's good for.

[laughs]

Now just drop dead!

[NIKKI]

How 'bout you drop dead?

If anybody's dyin',

it'll be you!

How are you standing after that?

I'm almost kinda impressed.

Well, if you wanna

dance, let's dance!

Praise be to Nikki,

the group's trusty big bro.

Don't waste amm*nit*on.

Got that, Yo?

Wasting the b*ll*ts means

wasting our secret w*apon.

Seriously? The cylinder

just has three sh*ts left!

What is that, Senku?

Another Tr*mp card?

[SENKU]

It's magnesium.

Get excited for some

impromptu fireworks.

Ready.

Oh-yo!

[IBARA]

Wh-Wha--?

[GEN] Spear of Light!

Unleash your fury!

[ISLANDERS gasp]

[GEN] There are sorcerers

aboard this vessel

and every last one's gonna go

pew-pew and light up the place!

[ISLANDERS yelling]

All right! That bluff

worked wonders!

[SENKU chuckles]

Well, it kinda helps when

it's not actually a bluff.

That g*n is legit.

[CHROME]

Check it out.

A boat is coming towards

us instead of fleeing.

[SENKU chuckles]

Somebody's certainly punctual.

Won't be escaping or talking

our way outta this one.

It's a head-on battle

with the biggest

and baddest of them all.

[NIKKI]

We're counting on you, sheriff!

[MOZ] It just takes the flick

of a sorcerer's finger

to work their strange

enchantments.

[MOZ]

That one's casting the spell.

I see your finger!

It has to be you!

[YO yells]

[YO screams]

The g*n! And just like

that, we're done for.

[KINRO groans]

Well, Senku? Any tricks left?

Some scientific Tr*mp card?

Played all our cards

from every suit.

Guess them's the breaks.

[GEN] Oh, man!

We're trapped like ship rats!

[CHROME] Now I know why

they call it a "dead end."

You tried, but failed.

Well, well, well!

At last we meet, invaders.

Ha-ha. You gave

a valiant effort.

I confess, I was left

in a state of awe!

However, the time has come

to put an end to this.

[SENKU]

Tch.

You didn't corner us.

We backed ourselves

into this room.

'Cause it's right

where we need to be.

Huh?

Inside the storage room?

We actually do have one

remaining card, Gen.

The one I didn't

wanna use. The joker.

[GEN]

I see.

Ibara and his army of cronies

weren't able to get through

this metal gate of science

when they had the chance.

Very well, then.

What choice do we have?

[gasps]

Ha-ha. No going back.

The wildest of wild

cards is free.

[KINRO]

Hyoga!

Take my spear.

Our fate's in your hands.

But we lost the g*n--

the only w*apon that could put

this guy back in his cage.

We know how insanely

strong he is,

so how are we going to stop him?

[chuckles]

That's a problem for the future

kingdom of science.

We don't even know if the

great Hyoga will team up

with the people who caged

him to begin with.

But if we want any

hope of winning

against their powerful ace,

our one and only option is

putting the joker into play.

[IBARA] The kid with the mask

they're calling "Hyoga,"

I could've sworn he was a statue

when we checked this room.

Actually, so was that one

in the fancy hat over there.

Where the hell do you think

you're going, you old--?

[HYOGA]

That swing was quite telling.

He's on an entirely other level.

[HYOGA]

This Moz person,

I take he's the reason

you revived me?

Yeah. Good job on piecing

it together yourself.

[HYOGA] Did you forget the

fact that I'm your enemy?

Nope, not for a millisecond.

[HYOGA] Which means I could

either join forces with you

and we can reign over the

kingdom of science together,

or I could join Moz and we

can annihilate the lot of you.

Decisions, decisions.

Regardless of what you want,

the choice is solely mine

to make in this situation.

[IBARA]

Those sorcerers have magic

that brings petrified

people back to life!

Even if they've been

shattered to bits!

[IBARA] This is bad!

What if they revive him?

[IBARA] The smashed remains

of the master's statue

still pose a thr*at!

[GEN groans]

[GEN] We need to get

Hyoga to declare Moz

his mortal enemy somehow!

Surely there's an oolproof-fay

means to make that happen.

You're a mentalist,

Gen, so think!

Maybe if I can convince Moz

that Hyoga's our sworn ally

and will die to defend us,

the latter will be forced

to fight the former.

[GEN]

Proposition for you.

Pretend you're madly in

love with Hyoga, okay?

[NIKKI gasps]

Um, hello?

Amaryllis is the one

who's good at faking

like she's in love with

someone, not me, Gen!

Yes, but you're the

only woman here now.

You can't be any

worse than Kohaku,

and even if you are, who cares?

Pucker your lips like this and

say those three small words!

Easy as pie!

All right. I'll say it

if it'll really help.

There's just one issue.

Those three small words,

well, they aren't

so small to me.

I won't say "I love you"

unless I'm genuinely

in love with them.

That rite of passage is special.

[GEN] Ah! I forgot! She's the

purest romantic of us all!

[HYOGA] Shut that slimy,

deceptive mouth of yours, Gen.

Consider it shut and locked!

I beg you to spare me!

[HYOGA]

You don't have to beg.

I value your silver tongue as

if it were made of solid gold.

You've been given a task in

this world and you excel in it.

The same goes for you, Nikki.

You were quick to act,

despite how hard it would be

for you to go through

with his request.

Yes, you are indeed proper.

[HYOGA] If I ally myself

with this formidable Moz,

I would have to k*ll almost

everyone here behind me.

You still want to save all of

humanity, don't you, Senku?

Pity you put stock in that

short-sighted goal.

[HYOGA] Quite simply, I believe

humans should be culled.

Leave the countless fools of

the petrified to their slumber

and only pass on superior genes.

Through evolution, we will give

rise to the apex of our kind.

Moz, what are your thoughts

regarding this matter?

[RYUSUI]

He's evaluating us.

His answer will determine

who he sides with.

Huh. Have to say I agree.

Hyoga is your name, isn't it?

Well then, Hyoga, you're right.

This culling of

yours sounds great.

[MOZ]

I can gauge his strength

about as well as I can

see his masked face,

but that's the answer

he wants to hear, right?

[MOZ] In fact, we already put

your beliefs into practice

on this island.

The prettiest women are

selected from the herd.

If you're as strong

as I take you for,

you too could have

a harem of your own.

[MOZ]

But I'll still k*ll you.

[RYUSUI laughs]

[RYUSUI]

What a childish mindset, Moz!

All women are beauties

in their own right.

To think you're blind

to such eye-candy.

I desire every woman

in the whole world!

They're all beauties?

[GEN] Well, I suppose it would

be more surprising to hear

that there was something

he didn't want.

[MOZ]

Hmm.

[HYOGA]

So if I'm reading you correctly,

the lone factor that determines

a person's worth to you

is how physically

attractive they are?

[MOZ]

Hm?

Of course. When it

comes to ladies.

Doesn't every man alive?

[HYOGA]

Ah, I see.

It was anyone's guess

whose side I chose.

I wasn't leaning one

way or the other.

Both have pros and cons.

[HYOGA]

But I've made up my mind.

Wow. It's done!

[SOYUZ]

Father.

Took years, but I

finally returned to you.

And now, we return you

to all of your people.

[IBARA]

What's this?

Kirisame!

What're the odds?

She came exactly when

I needed her to!

[HYOGA]

Senku, stand aside.

Uh-huh.

[yells]

He'll fight better

without us in his way.

Let's move out!

[yells]

Hang on, everybody,

because the retrieval team

is just about there!

[HYOGA]

See?

Setting me free was

the correct call.

My allies have done quite well.

Shazam!

Don't hurt me!

[GEN]

Best stay down!

Dangerous sorcerers

coming through!

[HYOGA] Though I'm sure you'd

love to chase after them,

you can't simply turn

your back on me.

You don't win battles

by ignoring them.

Let's have a proper fight.

[MOZ]

Heh.

[KINRO] We're heading

back to the island?

Yeah.

Which is a really bad idea!

The entire island's

gonna get blasted

by the petri-beam thing!

So why go back?

Well, for starters, we

definitely need to abandon ship.

I was talking out of my ass

when I said he'd fight

better if we left.

Hyoga ain't soft,

and he'd easily k*ll us.

[OTHERS]

Well, yeah!

[GEN] Ha. That was

in perfect harmony.

Truth be told, there's

a little something

we gotta go pick up

on the island.

If we can make what

I'm hoping for, it's over.

We win.

[MOZ]

Heh. All right, Hyoga.

If you really want a proper

fight, then let's have at it.

I'm even focusing, because

I know you're a strong one.

[HYOGA] Heh. Then he's finally

going to stop holding back.

[MOZ]

So sorry.

I feel like I gave

you the impression

that you stood a chance

when you never did.

[yells]

[growls]

Hey, Oarashi!

[IBARA chuckles]

I have a job for you to do.

Take this trinket here

and run it up to the

island's center, quickly!

[OARASHI]

Hm?

That means you're petrifying

the entire island?

You can't!

If Oarashi is holding the

device when it's activated,

he'll be caught in the light.

There's no way to escape it!

And? How exactly does

his fate affect me?

Come to think of it, though.

Petrification's not

a death sentence.

The sorcerers have a way

to revive stone people.

But even so, you're

staying here with me.

You have to protect me,

and you'll do a much

better job than Oarashi.

And besides, he's just

a disposable pawn. Right?

You're writing off

your loyal guard?!

Either way, not all of the

islanders are safe yet!

[IBARA]

This is the master's will.

You would dare to defy him?

It's the master's will?

[BOY A]

Hey! Master!

[BOYS shouting]

Pretty please?

Will you turn the

mountain to solid rock?

The whole thing! Bam!

But why? Just for a little fun?

We heard there's a

monster up there now.

We're scared. Really scared!

[SOYUZ'S DAD]

Hmm.

[KIRISAME screams]

[SOYUZ'S DAD]

It's a scarecrow.

One that's seen better days,

so someone must've

discarded it here.

[KIDS]

Ohh!

I want you to

understand something.

The petrification light mustn't

be used over a whole mountain,

or any broad area

for that matter.

[SOYUZ'S DAD]

Though we're a blessed species,

the world doesn't exist merely

to serve us humans.

It belongs to all living

creatures, both great and small.

May this be a lesson

you'll always remember.

[KIRISAME] Petrifying the

island's not only unheard of,

it's without a doubt

an abuse of that power.

Minister Ibara.

I'll ask you one time, is this

idea truly the master's will?

[TAIJU]

Hey!

Check it out, everybody!

We brought the master!

Hey, do you see?!

Your master's here!

Or what's left of him,

'cause he's nothing but

a stone statue now!

Wow, I bet everyone can hear

him, even from way up here.

He certainly projects.

We have to show them up close.

Hearing it doesn't mean

they believe it's true.

He was turned into stone?

What's going on? Explain now!

[TAIJU]

Look! This is the master!

Just one meter.

And one single second!

No! Why, Minister?

You-- You're pure scum! Ibara!

Farwell, my dear.

Thank you for your

hard work, dedication,

and above all else,

your gullible nature!

Shame it turned out this way,

but what could I do?

You're guilty of

knowing my secret.

They might att*ck!

[UKYO]

Let's go! Run as far as you can!

Well, it's almost done.

Only thing left is to turn

these invading rats

into crumbling piles of rock.

[g*nsh*t]

[gasps]

Um, what was that noise?

[groans] It's sorcery.

[YO] Ibara, you have the

right to remain silent!

[chuckles] I've been dying

to say that for years!

[YO] I sh*t one b*llet in the

air and a second at Moz,

but I saved the last

one for the big bad.

Crap you say will be

used against you.

How'd the rest go?

And is this battery?

Obstruction of

somethin'-or-other.

Ah, whatever.

The point is, you're under

arrest! For being a jerk!

[gasps]

[screams]

[laughs] Sweet victory!

Snatched the Medusa!