Baby Steps (2023)

[bunniefuu]

Not sure this was a good idea.

Why not?

Sounds like wallowing.

We're not wallowing

Were remembering.

Did you think we'd still

be together, a year later?

I tried not to have any speculations.

Okay, no. I didnt. Not really.

Yeah, me neither. But, I hoped

Happy anniversary, by the way.

Yeah, you too.

Are you happy, Beau?

Sometimes.

Sometimes very happy.

I know we made the right choice but,

love doesnt fix everything, does it?

No. So besides missing Lily, whats broken?

I wouldnt say broken.

But you know, someday Id like

to be able to pull my own weight.

You know I don't think... you do.

Im still not paying rent.

You know, I don't care.

I know, but I care. I do care.

You're really talented.

Business is getting steadily better.

Youll get there.

Can't cook for sh*t.

You're not that bad.

The standards are low.

Lilly couldnt cook either.

True. What else?

Nothing. Otherwise life is perfect.

Nothing is perfect.

Okay.

Life is good.

You're good and were good together.

Surprisingly good.

Youre a silly man.

Yes, but you need a

little silliness in your life.

Are you expecting something?

Its from my attorney.

Is it something about Lily

My love.

Forgive me for haunting you like this,

but since I don't believe in an afterlife,

This is the only way I can haunt you.

And I figured you'd

need some healing before

you could give this idea

the consideration it deserves.

I know this past year must have been hard.

I probably can't even imagine how hard.

I hope you and Caden have found

a way to help each other through it.

Enclosed is a bill.

It's up to you to decide

whether to continue paying.

I have frozen ten of my

prime pre chemo eggs.

I know you've always wanted to be a father.

It was always my plan to be a mother.

That obviously isn't going to happen.

But if you want, you could

still have a child that is ours.

No pressure. I'll never know either way.

But it's given me a bit of

comfort here at the end.

To think of you holding and loving

the child that is part of both of us.

Do what will make you happy.

Having you as my husband.

Made me incredibly happy.

I hope you know that.

And every part of you.

Holy crap.

You didn't know about this?

No, no, of course not.

I thought you guys shared everything.

So did I.

Well, Lily always did have

a flair for the dramatic

No sh*t.

Hey, was Lilly, right?

Have you always wanted kids?

I mean, yeah, it was

always the life I imagined.

Wife, kids.

I guess Im not much of a wife.

No, but youre a damn good

best friend with benefits.

So that's what we're calling it?

I still have no idea what to call it.

At work I refer to you as my partner.

Which sounds like we. Started

an accounting firm together.

Oh, well, with my friends, I

just call you my f*ck, buddy.

You do not!

No. I say boyfriend.

It's very middle school,

but it's better than partner.

What about you, you

never imagined being a dad?

I always thought I'd been awesome uncle,

to the kids you and Lily had.

But, um I never imagined myself as grown up

enough to be a dad or have kids in my own.

And what about now.

Are you asking me if I

want to have kids with you?

I don't know.

We're just talking hypothetically.

Okay, uhhh well, hypothetically.

I think I got to get back to you.

For what it's worth.

I think you would make a great dad.

Whats that smell?

Uhhh, snickerdoodles?

Well, more like snickerdoodle flavored

charcoal. The first batch didnt go well.

But this time, I'm setting the timer.

Thanks.

Why the sudden baking frenzy?

Some of my most vivid childhood memories

are mom baking,

Lily and I used to sneak these off the

cooling rack while they were still warm.

Why the nostalgia?

Your mom's okay, isn't she?

Yeah, she's fine. Dad too.

Look, if we do decide to have

a kid, I just want to be able

to create the same kind

of memories, you know?

I get it.

But not all positive memories

have to do with baked goods.

Whoa.

We are not raising our kids in some

kind of gluten free, sugar free zone.

Our kids,

I never thought any two

words could be that terrifying.

I thought you were

committed to the kid idea.

What? No.

I mean, I love kids.

I want kids.

But this isn't exactly how

I imagined having them.

With me, you mean?

You realize you'd be their

father and their uncle?

Now hows that not likely to be confusing?

Are you sure the

confusion is just for them?

Like having kids together would mean

that this or us is more than just

a phase.

To be honest, at first

That's what I thought.

They say everyone grieves in their own way.

And I thought maybe this was mine.

It was more than that.

It always was more for me.

But I also know that we never

would have gotten together

if we hadn't gone through

losing Lily together.

That doesnt make it less real though.

Does it? No.

No, it doesn't.

But this year, our whole relationship

has been in a kind of bubble.

We don't really hangout with your friends.

We dont really hangout with my

friends, we won't have any couple friends,

which bothers me.

You cant raise kids that way.

Right.

As they say, it takes the Village People.

It's funny.

Seriously, any kid of ours is going

to have two dads and a dead mom.

It's not exactly the Brady Bunch.

No, not exactly.

What are we going to do jump

into the gay parenting community.

I don't even know if I

should call myself gay?

Oh trust me, kids don't give a

sh*t how their parents identify.

They just accept whatever they get.

We can be daddy and papa or

dad and pops and thatll just be that.

I guess.

But they do need a

community to be a part of.

We can't raise them in a vacuum.

And that all starts with us

being comfortable as a couple.

Know, having kids together is more

than just a commitment to them.

It's you and me and

committing to each other.

You ready for that?

I think so.

Are you?

I mean, you know how

commitment phobic I've always been.

I do.

But I know that I love you

and I want to be ready.

And maybe that's as close as

someone like me is going to get.

No pressure.

Keep thinking about it.

Meantime, I think I'm going to call the

cryo-facility and pay for the next year.

Good. Mmm.

But I do think we should get out of

our bubble, start being more social.

Okay.

What do you have in mind?

No clue.

It's not like I have a ton of friends.

But would it be cool

if I invited over the guys to watch

the game with us this weekend?

Of course.

And I think it's sweet that you

want to become Betty Crocker

to our imaginary children.

But kids

don't need homemade cookies

if they have love and stability.

Private school.

Well,

Oh sh*t, I forgot to set the

timer. Im not f*cking up this batch.

Alright. The game doesn't

start for another few minutes.

Everyone got everything they need.

Yeah. Yep.

Yep. Good.

Okay. Uhhhhh.

I think I know what everybody's thinking.

Which one of us is the man?

And which one of us is the woman?

Nah, dude. We just all

assumed you were the girl.

Oh, f*ck off!

Ya,

I was kind of wondering that.

Seriously, Grady.

He brought it up.

You can't pretend like

it's not kind of weird.

Caden got laid more

than any of us in college.

Dude had game.

Hey, I still have game.

It's just not limited to the ladies.

Actually, it never was. Oh.

I called it. See I knew.

He swung both ways.

Jesus, Mike, you're not exactly psychic.

Caden told us that,

like, a million years ago.

He did not.

I did. The night we graduated.

I remember. It's just.

We're f*cked up that night.

I didnt take it seriously.

Besides, I mean, who hasn't

had a bit too much to drink

and let a guy go down on him?

You know, it's not like it's

it doesnt make you gay or bi or whatever?

It's just like, come on

Caden back me up here.

Yo, sorry dude

No one put me in charge

of handing out the gay cards.

Yeah, uhh but youre not like gay

gay though, right?

Because, like, I mean, like, you know uhh.

Candace, that was real?

Yeah, that was very real.

All right, guys, this just

isn't that complicated.

He likes girls.

He likes guys. This is no big deal.

Yeah, but you got to, like,

one more than the other.

Right now, I like Beau

more than anyone else.

And that is all that matters.

Look umm,

I understand the curiosity

The truth is, were figuring it out.

That's cool.

That's real cool.

And don't let Grady's incredibly

insensitive comments worry you.

He's just, being Grady.

He lacks the filter that

normal people have.

Ah, but I do have a filter.

You all should hear the sh*t I don't say.

That is truly frightening.

I can't imagine.

But I would pay to read it.

Are we going to actually watch the game?

Or are we going to sit here and listen to

him talk about where Caden puts his d*ck?

Come on. (game noise)

I. I mean, either is

interesting but you know.

Oh come on. Yeah.

(Game noise)

Thanks for cleaning us out

of snacks and beer, assholes.

Yeah.

Oh, sorry.

For what?

It was good to have some

company over for the game.

Really?

It started off a bit weird

and Grady is kind of a lot.

Yeah, but.

Josh and Mike seem cool.

Oh, they are.

And Grady's a good guy

once you get to know him.

I can see that

Josh is the one who's married

and has a kid, he's kind of

like the grown up in a group.

He was in the m*llitary, before college.

So you're saying he's old like me?

I was saying... that it might

be nice to have friends with kids.

You know if we

go down that path.

Yes, I agree.

I don't think I ever realized

how straight they all are.

Theres nothing wrong with straight.

I thought I was straight for

the first 39 years of my life.

Yeah, I know.

But I just feel like at this point, maybe

we should try hanging out

with a more diverse crowd.

(music plays)

It's so good to see you Beau.

And you, to Caden.

Although, I have to admit, I

didn't imagine you two together

in a million years.

Join the club.

It's so great to finally meet you guys.

Alex has told me the whole story.

I think it's really hot.

I mean, not the part about Lilly dying.

That was terrible. Obviously.

Two straight men falling in love.

My God.

Thats the stuff of gay romance novels.

I wasn't exactly straight.

Well, yeah, of course.

But you really only dated women, right?

I dated. Yeah.

Yeah.

Beau was the real deal, though.

Never even had a jack off.

Buddy in high school.

Right.

Right. Sorry.

You know, Lily tended to overshare.

So, now do you consider yourself

what?

Gay, bisexual, sexually fluid?

Honestly, I don't.

I still feel like the same person.

Ive always been, always

used to be straight.

But now Im in love with Caden.

Well, whatever you call it.

I know Lily would be

proud, of the both you.

And I know she didn't

believe in an afterlife.

But I have to think, she's

around here somewhere.

Just looking at the two of

you and going, mmmhmmmm

To Lily.

To Lily.

It was good to see Aiden, and

he seems really happy with Alex.

Great guys.

Yeah, great.

Super gay though. So very very...

Which is obviously fine, obviously.

But uhh God, when Aiden went

off on that rant about Ginger Minj.

At first I thought he

was talking about a cat.

I thought it was like an,

Oral hygiene problem. I did not...

Ohh God, we are hopeless.

I just think there are too many seasons

of RuPaul's Drag Race behind us now.

We're never going to catch up.

Do you want to get caught up.

With all the cool shows

on Netflix and Prime.

Girl's got to have her priorities

right?

I... I don't think I'll

ever feel comfortable

referring to myself with

female pronouns, even as a joke.

Even with you.

Sorry.

Yeah. Id probably die of

shock if you ever did. (laughing)

Salads done.

How are the burgers coming along?

Hmmmm, another 5 minutes. Alright.

What? Nothing.

You just, look like such a dad.

What am I getting a dad bod?

No, no, that's not what I meant.

I just remember my dad grilling

burgers and hot dogs every summer,

lots of good memories.

If we did have kids,

would I be the mom?

Well, you have the hips for it!

What I meant was, who

would be the primary parent?

Somebodys got to handle

all the doctor's appointments

the middle of the night feedings,

kissing the booboos when they fall down.

Wed share all that.

No gender roles right?

We split everything 50/50.

Does that make the most sense though?

Youve got a real job.

That's how we have such a nice house.

How someday we'll be

able to afford private school.

So you want to be the mom?

Hence the attempt at cookie baking.

I don't know.

I guess I'm trying it on.

It seems to make the most sense.

Maybe, logistically.

But is that what you want?

I just don't know.

I know I could be a fantastic uncle.

I think I could be a good dad.

I just.

I don't know if I could

handle being a mom. Oh.

(radio playing) Uh can

you drive around the block?

Im not done with the grocery list.

Since when

do we have a grocery list?

Since I started cooking better

meals. Im planning recipes,

so that means buying specific

things. Not just picking up

whatever crap seems appealing

between the beer isle and the chips isle.

Do you hear yourself?

You sound like...

Don't, dont say it.

I like them all.

(music plays)

I'm not sure this was a good idea.

Why not? Theyre here to help gay

couples who are thinking about having kids?

Were not exactly a gay couple.

Were certainly not a

straight couple. Hi, everyone.

Please take a seat. My

name is Beth Getting started.

...and a couple of years ago

I was sitting where you are.

And now my wife and I

have a beautiful baby girl.

I'm not going to lie.

It's been a long, expensive and

sometimes traumatic journey to parenthood.

But for us it's been so worth it.

And maybe it'll be worth it for you, too.

We're going to show a brief

presentation and then afterwards

we'll answer questions

(music plays)

Ok then if no one else has any questions,

that ends the formal part of the meeting.

Stick around. Get to know each other.

There's coffee and snacks in the back.

So what did you think?

Umm, lot's of great information.

Hey. Hey.

What's the hurry?

We don't know any of these people. Right?

And we won't if we don't talk to them.

It just, I don't know how to

act around groups of gay people,

Lily was fine, she was so social.

I could just be the cool silent

straight guy hanging out with his wife.

Hey, newsflash.

You were never cool and

apparently not entirely straight.

Point taken, but I could smile

and nod and let Lily take the lead.

Now I'm in an actual

relationship with a guy.

The gays expect me to be

one of them, and I'm just not.

Makes it hard to connect.

Okay. Okay.

People connect around a common interest.

All these people are thinking

about having kids just like us. Ok true.

So let's go talk to them.

Oh, no, no, no.

Oh, hi.

I'm Caden.

This is Beau.

We were thinking about having a baby.

Well, yeah, that's kind of

what brought us all here.

Right, obviously.

Are you thinking of surrogacy or adoption?

Surrogacy?

Definitely.

Yeah, there's ummm.

There's a bit of a story there.

Hi. So Beau wants us to have kids.

You're having trouble

conceiving, am I right?

Sorry.

But seriously, bro, congrats.

I haven't agreed yet.

Why, you love kids?

I dont know, I mean were really solid.

And I do love kids.

But... Whoa, what's the hold up?

It's just.

How did you and Haley know you were ready.

Dude,

If people waited until they were ready,

the human race would have d*ed out by now.

Yeah, but isn't having

kids before you're ready

the reason why the

human race is so f*cked up?

I mean, maybe.

But you're not going to f*ck it up

any worse than the rest of us, right?

How do you know? Okay.

Being a parent is playing for keeps.

I have never had a relationship

that I couldn't get out of.

That's bullshit.

You've never been able to escape

being your parents son or Lilly's brother?

Ya, that, that's different.

No, it's. Not.

It's family.

And you've always shown up for family.

What you did for Lilly

that was above and beyond.

Yeah, but I wanted to do that for Lilly.

And you don't think you're going

to want to be there for that kid?

Trust me, once you see its tiny,

scrunched, angry red little face,

you're going to melt.

I know you, man. You're going to k*ll this.

No, that's just it.

I'm worried that I might actually k*ll it.

Don't babies have that soft,

squishy part of their heads

where you might actually poke their brains

out? Caden that squishy part is adorable.

And you're not going to

poke anybody's brains out.

You don't know that.

I'll read the books and all, but

I don't know sh*t about babies.

You think I did? Like,

you'll figure it out.

You're dumb, but you're not that dumb.

Are you sure?

You and Beau babysit sometime?

We could use the break,

and it'll give you a sense of

what it's like to take care of a kid.

I dont know?

I feel like if I accidentally.

k*ll your kid, it might put

a strain on our friendship.

And the freezing of human eggs

is still relatively new, so we don't

know how long they'll be viable.

So we should use them

sooner rather than later.

Yeah.

All the evidence suggests that they'll

be good for many years, but I want

you guys to know that

eggs aren't the only factor.

Men's sperm become less viable as they age.

Youre like what, 50?

Just turned 40.

Actually.

Okay.

Oh, you're serious? Oh, okay.

Well, if you're serious about

it, we should do a sperm count.

And if it's all good, we

should freeze a sample.

Your gametes will never be in

better shape than they are right now.

And you seem younger.

Your sperm should be in terrific shape.

The eggs are my sister's so hard pass.

Oh, yuck.

That wasn't in my file. Lily was my twin.

Isn't there an increased chance of

twins or even triplets with in vitro?

You know, there used to be.

But now we can screen

pretty effectively for viability,

and we only implant one embryo at a time.

But we could still do

two if we want to. Yeah.

If your surrogate says yes.

I don't see why not, Doc. Never

mind the surrogate. What about me?

I haven't even agreed to one yet.

But we don't want an

only child, though right?

And if we're planning

on having more than one,

doesn't it make sense to do

them both at the same time?

I, I, I, I don't know.

I, this is happening awfully, awfully fast.

Oh, shh shh sh.

Why dont you boys take some time.

Think about what we've discussed.

And in the meantime.

I'd really like to collect your sperm.

I was speaking professionally.

You guys got that right?

I was that.

I wasn't.

Sorry.

I got a little panicky, but Jesus twins.

I don't know. You just sprung that on me.

We haven't even really

decided if we want one yet.

Actually, I have.

I've decided.

What?

I don't want to pressure you but,

I think we can make it work.

The world is f*cked up, you know.

And then we would be bringing

a life... or lives into this mess.

The world has always been f*cked up.

These kids will have two parents who

love them and would do anything for them.

That's more than most people get.

(music playing)

Plus, with your genes and Lily's genes,

I guess they'll be super

smart and gorgeous.

Some of those genes are yours too you know?

Yeah.

I know.

I guess it's kind of cool, but

I'm mostly excited for

a bit of Lily to live on.

So that kind of sounds

like you want to do this.

No, no, that.

That's not what I

said. I don't not want it.

I just.

I'm thinking that that... Breathe Caden.

Hi, Caden.

Oh, hi Haley.

Hi, Milly.

Milly say hi to Uncle Caden.

You're not really my Uncle.

No, no Im not

Lily, why don't you go

play with your friends?

Mommy come with me. I

want to talk with Caden.

You go have fun.

Please, Mommy, please. I

dont want to play by my... Justin?

Thanks again for watching

Milly this afternoon.

Josh and I so appreciate it.

Oh, are you kidding me?

You guys are doing me a favor.

I have this theoretical idea that I love

kids, but Im barely ever around them.

Yeah, Josh was saying you and Beau

are thinking of having some of your own.

Yeah, we are.

Well, uhh Beau really wants them.

I just, uh.

I don't know.

I mean, they're so adorable.

I've never really taken on

that much responsibility.

I usually break out into a rash at the

thought of signing a six month lease.

I'm not kidding.

I mean the responsibility

of another human life.

That, that's terrifying.

Ya no sh*t.

I lost Milly once in a

mall for, like, a minute,

and I seriously thought my

heart was going to explode.

It was pounding so hard.

Oh, but at least women

have those maternal instincts.

I mean, what do I have?

Your good looks?

Come on, Caden.

You care.

Ya but you really think that's good enough?

Don't get me wrong,

you're going to f*ck up.

We all f*ck up.

But the good parents are

the ones trying not to f*ck up

and thatll be you and Beau.

You haven't even really met Beau yet.

I know that if you do this, it'll

be because you both really want it

and not because it happened

or because it's expected.

Milly was planned, but I can't tell you

how many of the people

I went to high school with

are having kids because it's time or

uhhh because their birth control failed,

or because they were too drunk

or high to worry about birth control

in the first place. Yeah.

Yeah.

That's a pretty shitty reason

to bring new life to the world.

Agreed.

(music plays)

It's a grilled cheese sandwich.

It was my favorite when I was your age.

I'm lactose intolerant.

Oh, sh*t.

UUhhhh, okay.

Shucks, shucks, shucks.

I said shucks, if your mom asks.

You're busted?

I am busted. Don't worry.

My dad says that word all that time. Oh.

My mom says I'm not supposed to say it

unless I'm talking about actual poop.

Then it's okay. But poop is still better.

Yeah. Your mom is a wise woman.

I guess I should have asked

you what you wanted for lunch.

I'm sorry.

I thought grilled cheese was a cant miss.

I'm not hungry.

Can we go play outside? Outside?

Like in the street?

In the yard.

No one plays in the street.

Oh, right.

Do we have, like, a ball... or anything?

I wouldn't have thought a four year old

would know the term lactose intolerance.

Oh, we're lucky she spoke up.

Most kids would have

just eaten the sandwich.

And we would have to

explain to Josh and Haley why

their daughter has the runs.

She's a great kid.

I have to tell you, it's only been a

couple of hours and I'm exhausted.

Well, buckle up, buttercup.

You're going to have twins

youre going to be exhausted.

24/7, for years.

Yeah, but it'll be worth it.

Kids are such... oh crap.

Whered she go?

Milly, where are you?

Honey, we can't play hide and go seek

without everyone knowing we're playing.

Check in the front.

I'll check in the house. Yeah.

Milly

Oh, come on, Milly.

Please dont be kidnapped or dead.

Milly! Honey, you in here?

Milly?

Milly? Privacy please.

I don't need grownups to help

when its just number one.

Okay, honey, just

let us know if you need anything

Is she with you?

Yes, she's here.

Uhhh, just took a pee break,

and she's four, so she

doesn't need our help.

Just FYI.

Ok

Lily

if any part of you remains out there

in the universe, please.

I need you.

f*ck, what am I.

What am I doing?

Hey, Babe.

Sorry to bother you.

I know you're working, but umm...

Yeah, I need you.

Okay, whats up?

Can you uhhh

be Lily for a minute?

Look, I'm all for role

playing but... Look, I just.

I just need Lily to help

me make this decision.

About parenthood?

Yes. I never made a decision

this big without talking to her.

And, you know, it's like she

can just see through my bullshit,

and she doesn't just cheerlead.

She gives it to me straight.

Can you do that for me?

Oh, I'm not going to imitate her, but

I can try to put myself in her mindset.

Okay.

Thanks, umm here it goes.

I think I may be too selfish

a person to be a good parent.

Are you the man who dropped everything

to become a world class caregiver

to his sick sister?

No, that wasn't unselfish.

I did that because I love Lily so much.

And not not that that I

needed to be here with her.

What makes you think you won't

feel that way about your own kids?

But that's what Josh said.

But but what if I don't?

I think every parent worries about

that, but it hardly ever happens.

And maybe that's why nature

makes all baby mammals so adorable.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

I mean, you know, maybe possums are cute,

but they grow up to be freaking hideous.

Well, chances are really strong.

These kids are going to be adorable.

And even if they're not, I bet youll

instantly love them beyond all reason.

And if I don't.

Maybe not in an instant, but I know you.

You are so full of love.

I can't imagine you won't find a nice

big chunk of it for these small creatures

who depend on you.

I think that's what scares me.

Yeah.

I'm like the world's most grown up.

Grown up.

And even my heart skips a b*at

when I think about how

much they're going to need us.

Especially at first.

Right.

I mean, how on earth do people do this.

The way they accomplish anything?

Self-delusion.

They focus on the good and then

deal with the bad as best they can.

Isn't that pretty much what I said.

That help?

I mean right at the end there

I think I was mostly just

being mean, not Lily... but

Maybe, but I think Lily

would have said pretty

much the same thing.

For what it's worth, I think

she'd want this for you, for us.

Yeah. Yeah, she would.

But you can't do it for her

or for me.

You have to do it

because it's what you want.

I know, and I do want it.

It's just.

I don't know if I can handle it.

It wont be just you, itll be us.

And I think we can handle.

In fact, I think we'll be great.

We worked as a team and

didn't panic when we lost Milly.

Oh, we can't ever tell

Haley and Josh about that.

Ever. Take it to our graves

(childs bell chime)

Beau... Beau, wake up.

What?

Are we having an earthquake?

Just metaphorically. Huh?

Our lives are about to be shaken,

were going to be parents.

And that means you need to start

getting used to being woken up suddenly

in the middle of the night.

And so you decided? I decided.

Thank you.

I'm not doing it for you.

I know.

Thank you for being the kind of man

whos willing to push past his fears.

Am I feeling what I think Im feeling?

Maybe?

You know, that's not how we're

going to make these babies.

Yeah, but you dont want to

stop trying, do you? Not at all.

You're okay with us

trying for twins, right?

Yeah.

I've only ever known being a twin, so,

you know, in a way it makes perfect sense.

But it does mean twice as

many diapers, twice as much

everything. Ya but at least

we get it all out of the

way at the same time.

You don't have to convince me.

Im in. I just hope we

know what we're doing.

We probably don't.

But your parents managed to muddle

through it, and I'm sure we will too.

Yes, we will, Daddy.

Maybe, don't, call me that.

I'm just enough older than you...

Yeah, no, I heard it the

moment it came out of my mouth.

You sure you don't want

me to come in and help?

That would be weird.

I bet people do it all the time.

I bet they don't.

Once you give them your samples,

How long before we

know if the sperm is viable?

Uhhh a few days, I think.

Yeah.

So do they like, take one and

just, like, inject it into the egg...

or do they take the egg and just

drop it in a big pool of your splooge

and let the best one win?

What?

I have no idea.

I guess that's a question

for Doctor Nguyen.

And when

(music plays)

(love making sounds)

(music and building climax)

So to what do I owe this honor?

I hardly see you anymore.

Yeah, sorry. We've been pretty busy.

Kind of a lot going on, actually.

So things are going well?

Yeah, yeah.

Really well.

If you remember I always liked Beau.

Long before you did.

Yeah, I know.

You were always smarter than me. Oh, yeah.

Well, here I am, still stuck

working a nowhere job for shitty pay.

Okay.

That's kinda what I

wanted to talk to you about.

You have a job for me.

If you're finally moving

into nude photography,

I expect top dollar and

I have photo approval.

No

No, that's. That's not it.

But it's good to know your terms. And

uhh... you do have the body for it.

Thanks.

Uh, so what is it then?

Okay, theres kind of

no, unawkward way to say it.

So I'm just going to come out and say it.

Have you ever thought

about being a surrogate?

Seriously?

Yeah, seriously.

Lily froze some eggs. Holy sh*t.

Yeah, yeah, I know. Umm Beau

and I have been thinking really hard on

it and we decided wed like to try it out.

And you're not about to ruin your figure.

Okay. Wed pay you, of course.

And we did a little research

and 25K is pretty standard.

Plus we cover medical expenses, obviously.

$25,000.

I mean, you could finally go

back to school and finish school or

or bank it for a rainy day.

Wow, uh yeah, uhh this

is a lot to think about.

I know.

And we don't expect an

answer right away, but umm

will you consider it?

Would you want me to be involved in,

the kid's life? Absolutely.

And there might be two kids.

Oh my, holy sh*t.

Umm Im sorry, I know

I said that already, but...

No, no, it bears repeating.

And because no matter

who carries the babies,

we'd hope that you'd like to be,

Aunt Candace.

These kids are going to

need good female role models.

Yeah and in the absence of

good ones, you'll settle for me.

Exactly.

Uhhh well... It is an

intriguing offer. Uhhh

I'm not saying yes,

but I'm also not saying no.

Thank you.

You're the best. Hey.

What's wrong?

Its just ummm

this isn't how I imagined

carrying your baby.

You know, I did love you

even if I was too big a jerk to

say it.

I know.

I knew it then

but it doesn't make it any easier.

(music plays)

Hey, so how did it go?

Well uhh, the good

news is she didn't say no.

She's intrigued.

Great.

The other news is that umm

we kind of hooked up.

Very funny.

It wasn't planned.

It just

sort of happened.

Was this before or after you

asked her to carry our babies?

After I was.

I was so excited that she was considering

it... we hugged, which turned into

kissing. Ya, I understand

how hooking up works.

So why are you telling me this?

Because it happened

and we don't keep secrets.

So this is the first time you've done this?

Of course I told you no secrets.

Yeah well, I also thought we

didn't f*ck our ex-girlfriends.

Well.

To be fair, we never discussed it.

I didn't think we had to discuss it.

Lots of couples these days aren't

monogamous, especially gay couples.

I thought we were committed to each other.

We're planning to start a family.

I am committed. Nothing has changed.

Nothing except you f*cked Candace,

who may end up being the birth mother

of our babies.

Okay. In retrospect,

I can see how that might not have

been one of my wiser life choices.

You think?

Look,

if it's not cool with you,

it won't happen again.

Cool with...

Have I ever given you any

reason to think I'd be cool with it?

No, but umm...

But what?

But we never actually, ya know talked

about how this could work long term.

So what are you saying?

You want to open things up, now

that we're about to become parents?

I dont know, I just.

I know you still think about women.

So do I.

Thinking and doing are totally different.

I know, I know. It's just.

Doesn't the thought of

never having sex with anyone

but me for the rest of your life

scared the hell out of you? No.

Well, you're a better man than me.

Clearly,

(music plays)

Youre not seriously planning to sleep

here, you probably still smell like her.

I showered.

You know,

if we're in it for the long haul, we

need to be able to talk about anything.

I thought we were in it for the long haul,

but apparently we have different

ideas about what that means.

Okay, maybe we do.

But how shutting me out

gonna resolve those differences?

I'm hurt.

Okay. I think I'm entitled to be hurt.

You are.

Look I f*cked up.

I don't want to get all

Freudian or anything.

But don't you think it's

awfully coincidental that you cheated on me

while we were planning the biggest

commitment a couple can make?

It wasn't exactly cheating, and we

never committed to being exclusive.

Really?

You want to discuss

technicalities right now?

Ill be in the guest room if you need me.

You sure you dont want

to go stay with Candace.

Yeah, I'm sure.

(childrens music box plays)

(door knock)

Hi. Cadens not here, he had a gig today.

I uhh, came to see you.

Can I come in?

I'm assuming Caden told

you about what happened.

I came here to apologize.

I feel terrible. And

if you'll still have me,

I'd like to offer to be

your surrogate.

(music plays)

That's above and beyond

as an apology goes. The

apology and decision are separate.

I thought about it a lot. And

and the fact is, I

I loved Lily.

And I love you and Caden.

And frankly, I would love to

have some money in my bank.

But um more importantly,

it would be a way for me to honor

the love that the three of you shared.

It would make me really

happy to do this for you.

Yeah, well, I'm not sure

it's such a great idea.

I'm not still in love with him Beau,

and I am not trying to get him back.

What happened was a

a last spasm of nostalgia,

and it won't happen again.

I, I promise.

Can I think about it?

Yes, of course.

(sigh)

Im going to go.

What was so important that

you had to see me right now?

Hi, Liza. It's good to see you.

You look great. Oh, please don't lie to me.

I look like I haven't had a good

night's sleep in weeks because I haven't.

Um I I'm sorry. This won't take long.

Can I come in? No, you can't come in.

I dont want to explain to my

children why my ex-boyfriend

is having an emotional breakdown

in the middle of the living room.

Okay, so, you know, my wife d*ed last year.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I uh, I'm sorry Beau.

What you might not have heard

is that I'm now in a relationship

with her brother.

Oh, God, I didn't see that coming.

Me neither.

But in taking care of Lily, we became uh...

started to depend on each other,

love each other.

So you're gay now?

I dont know,

bi, maybe?

I guess? I mean if you

have to put a label on it.

Oh, well, please don't

do that in my account,

but can you get to the part that

has something to do with me?

Kids!

If I have to come in there,

you're not going to like it.

I can see this isn't a great time. No.

The the thing is, my guy...

Caden, he slept with his ex.

Oh. A woman. Oh.

Oh, if you're here to

even the score, I'm not...

Oh, no, no, no, of course not.

No, it just got me wondering about

this whole relationship. Uh-huh.

Was it really what both

of us wanted, or did we...

just fall into this because we...

needed each other?

How am I supposed to know I

never met Lily or your brother in law?

I know, but once upon a time, you

knew me better than anyone else.

Yeah, that was a long time ago.

And you are clearly not the same person.

And neither am I.

No, but.

I'm not quite sure what

you're looking for, Beau?

I mean, do

do you want my blessing?

Because you have it. Go be happy.

No, no, no, no, no.

That's not it.

I guess I just want to understand,

why didn't we work out?

I mean werent we happy?

At least for a while?

Pfff oh, you want the truth?

Ummmm, I got bored.

You got bored?

You know, I mean,

I think that we were a little too similar,

and there just wasn't much of a spark.

You know I mean, you were

you are a really great guy.

Just a straight arrow, huh?

Yeah.

Maybe.

Got that one wrong.

So you needed someone a little

wilder?

No, I think we both needed

somebody to challenge us.

I found that in Ted. And from what I heard,

you found that in Lily, and

maybe now in her brother

Thanks.

Alright uh, I appreciate your help, and

I'm glad you found what

you were looking for.

Yeah, my life's a real party!

Uhhh, good luck, Beau.

I hope it all works out.

(door opens)

Beau? In here.

You're still doing that?

Candace came by the house this afternoon.

Oh? She came to apologize,

and to tell us that

she wants to be our surrogate.

Oh, my God.

That's amazing.

I told her wed get back to her.

I mean, do you even still want to do this?

Do we still want us?

Nothing has changed for me, Beau.

I love you.

Then why did you have to f*ck her?

I've been thinking about this all day.

I think I was just scared. Well, great.

Because now I'm scared to.

I went to see

Liza today. Minnelle?

No, my ex

before Lily.

Oh, right. And?

And I managed not to have sex with her.

Look, I didnt consciously

try to sabotage this.

But that's probably

exactly why it happened.

You still love her?

No, not like that. You want out? No.

Because we both kind

of just fell into this.

Maybe we're just not meant

to be together. No, I don't.

I don't believe in meant too.

But I believe in you.

And I believe in us. You're my best friend.

And when I let you down, this feeling

in the pit of my stomach, this ache,

I can't even describe it. It.

It's terrible.

I don't believe in soul mates.

But in my heart, I...

I know you and I share

something irreplaceable.

I do believe in soul mates.

And I thought Lily was mine.

And maybe it's crazy, but part of

what I love about you is your Lilyness

All the ways you two are alike.

The ways you push me

out of my comfort zone.

Maybe we're just too different.

No, no. No.

I don't believe that. No, sure

we're different in a lot of ways, but

we're alike in ways that matter.

How can you be sure?

I can't.

I mean, that's why commitment is so scary.

But I'm more scared of

losing you and of losing this

life we started building together.

That's the way I feel, too.

But you said I wasn't good enough for you.

That's not what I said.

You said the thought of

never having sex with anyone

else was terrifying.

A marriage and monogamy

worked for you and Lily that doesn't

mean they're going to work for you and me.

I know, I'm old fashioned,

and I know we never made any promises,

but the kind of guy I am, I am all in.

I couldn't even imagine raising

kids together unless I felt that way.

I'm all in too, but I guess for

me, sex is different from love.

Of course they're different.

And of course it's not going to be as

exciting now as it was in the beginning.

That's normal. I know,

but I still don't like it.

Neither do I.

Why can't we explore

new ways of keeping things

exciting together?

I didn't know that you'd want to explore

anything too exciting.

I mean you almost had a stroke

when I brought home that butt plug.

Because it was the size of a traffic cone.

Okay. Okay.

I may have overreached with that one.

If we're both still attracted to women,

what about

sharing one?

Really?

Youd be down for that?

Just not Candace.

Right.

A neutral third party.

You make it sound like we

should hire a notary public!

Is that what they do?

I've always wondered.

I'm liking this idea.

But no one who looks like Lily.

I'm kinky, but I'm not that kinky.

I think we're safe.

Lily was one of a kind.

So am I still exiled to the guest bedroom?

I'm so sorry.

I nearly screwed this up.

I love you, you know.

Really, really.

You really did

screw this up.

Now, there's no way

Candace can be our surrogate.

Why not?

Because every time I see

her, I'm going to be imagining

the two of you f*cking.

You do have to admit,

its kind of a hot mental

picture? Haha.

That's part of the problem.

You're the one my heart belongs to.

(bumps soda can)

Oh uhh... I just clean here, maybe uhh...

Okay.

Okay.

(music plays)

Thanks for coming into town guys.

Of course.

Now tell us what's wrong?

Nothing's wrong.

You're not sick, are you?

Your mother couldn't

take it if you were sick.

No, I'm fine, Dad.

I'm really good.

Beau and I are happy.

That's good.

I know you don't want to talk

about it, or think about it... but we,

won't have that luxury for much longer.

What does that mean?

Beau and I are planning to have a baby.

Babies.

Actually. Lily's babies.

Hey, are ready to

hear our specials?

Umm, can you give us a minute please?

I dont understand?

Lily froze some of her eggs?

Oh, my goodness.

Yeah, that's kind of big news.

Which is why I didn't want

to just tell you over the phone.

That's beyond big.

I know I've been a disappointment to you.

You think I'm a heathen

and probably a degenerate.

Oh Caden, we don't

think any of those things.

We don't pretend to understand your life,

but we know you are a good person

and you are going to

make a wonderful father.

Thanks, Mom.

So if we do this, will you be...

Of course!

I would love to carry the babies.

What?

That's what...

you were going to ask, right?

I mean, it's not like you and Beau

could do it? Unless I'm seriously behind

on how far reproductive

technology has come?

No, no, of course we can't.

But we don't expect you too.

I know you think I'm ancient,

but I'm actually in great shape.

Sure. Sure. Mom. But aren't you?

You know?

Past menopause.

Oh Caden.

I'm not going to be conceiving

the baby, just carrying them.

You need to do your research.

Its... what do the kids call it? Ohh...

It's a thing.

That actually is not

what I was going to ask.

I just wanted to be sure you and Dad

would want to be a part of the kids lives.

Well of course.

How could you even ask that?

Nothing would make us happier.

Abigail, have you lost your mind.

Two men raising babies?

That is not what God intended.

Oh, how can we presume

to know what God intends?

The Bible is very clear.

The Bible was written

thousands of years ago and is

open to all sorts of interpretations

and misinterpretations.

Besides,

I don't recall any restrictions

on a mother carrying her own

daughter's babies if she

can't carry them herself.

Wow, that's umm

very progressive.

Uh... well I dont know about that

I just want grandchildren!

And if I have to push them

out myself, then so be it.

So, when is all this happening?

I should probably start

knitting booties right away.

Whoa, slow down Mom.

There's plenty of time.

And I still have to discuss

your offer with Beau.

Candace is also willing

to carry the babies.

Oh. Oh, well, that's

very generous of her,

but she should wait and

carry her own baby someday.

For me, this would be a

privilege, not just a favor.

What about me?

Dont I have a say in this?

Oh, honey, I really want to do this.

Are you going to forbid me?

Would that work?

Okay, just calm down.

Before we let this

escalate to World w*r three.

Mom, we need to make sure that

you're not putting your health at risk.

Oh I'm strong as an ox!

I know, but let's get

everything checked out.

Okay?

In the meantime, I should probably start

knitting sweaters, blankets, booties.

My gosh, there is so much to do.

Well, I should have realized that for you,

more than anything, this

would be a knitting opportunity.

So I told you about how excited my

mom is at the thought of being a grandma?

Which I expected also, as

expected, your dad really not on board

with the idea of two

men having babies? Right.

Umm but I think I forgot to tell

you the weirdest part, though...

She offered to

be our surrogate.

How could you forget to mention that?

I guess I didn't forget.

It just didn't seem important, right?

Were not asking my

mom to carry our babies.

Why not?

Why not? Because it's my mom.

I don't want my kids coming out

the same vag*na I came out of.

That's just too weird.

Oh, really?

Now things are too weird.

What do you think this is a good idea?

Well,

she volunteered, right?

And theyd be her own grandkids.

Plus, there's the added benefit

that you haven't had sex with her?

(Huff) You're still not past that?

Come on. Candace is the

much stronger candidate.

Because she's younger?

Maybe?

But your mom's already

given birth to twins.

We know she can do it.

But, Candace, we don't have to worry

about her getting emotionally attached.

We already have enough

to worry about with my mom

and trying to keep her from

stealing these kids to raise herself.

She's not going to do that.

I think I know my mom a little bit

better than you do. Okay, granted.

But we won't let her.

We wouldn't move forward with

the surrogacy until she was

completely clear on her role.

No, no, I'm just not comfortable

with having our surrogate be my mom.

No. Plus, my dad is dead set against it.

I mean, you should have seen his face.

He hates the whole idea

of us having these babies.

I'm not comfortable with the

idea of it being your ex girlfriend.

Who you recently f*cked.

(music)

Do you think we should get married?

Why are you proposing?

I don't know?

I mean, we're having kids together.

Shouldn't we be married?

Are you worried about your parental rights?

Does your name is going to be

with mine on the birth certificate?

No, I'm not worried about that.

I just.

Is this something you want?

Is pretty important to me with Lily.

I'm no Lily.

Hey, don't do that.

That's not what I meant.

I love you, you know that.

I know.

But marrying again, even someone

Lily pretty much handpicked for me,

it just feels.

Like it's me that just doesn't feel right?

Umm no, you feel fantastic.

All right. Seriously. Seriously!

Hey, you don't want to get married?

Not right this minute?

Not until we figure out

this whole monogamy thing.

I told you nothing will ever happen

with Candace, again.

I know we are planning a lifetime together.

And if you can't imagine ever

having sex with anyone else,

then we've got some figuring out to do.

Okay. You said you'd be

down for bringing in a third.

Have you thought

any more about that.

As matter of fact, if you look for,

ohhh... people seeking

threesomes in our neighborhood,

you get about a million guys

looking to have sex with two women

and a grand total of three women

looking to have sex with two guys.

Three, huh?

Are any of them cute?

They're all attractive.

But you're still not sold on the idea?

I'm sorry.

Really, I am. I just.

I grew up with the idea of romantic

love being between a man and a woman,

and I had to stretch myself

almost to the breaking point

to wrap my head around

it being between a man

and a another man.

I don't know if I can accommodate it being

between a man, another man and a woman.

Okay. Okay.

We're not talking about love.

We're talking about sex.

I know, but I've never

been any good at casual sex.

Well, maybe Im good enough

at it for the two of us.

Okay.

Okay. Come on.

You can't deny that we

would be very hot thriple.

Did you just make up that word?

No, its a thing.

Oh, maybe I'm just too

old for this brave new world.

You've still got a lot of

good life in you, old man.

You just got to find that

somebody who gives you

a stiffy! Oh god.

(door knock)

Well, hi.

You must be Chad and Jeremy.

Yeah, yes, right on.

That's us, Chad and Jeremy.

Come on in.

I have to admit, I'm kind of

surprised you agreed to come here.

I mean, you don't know us, and... Oh.

Don't worry.

I posted all about this on my insta.

So if I show up missing, you'll have a sh*t

ton of people on your doorstep in no time.

Oh, okay.

Well, I think that's

smart, but as you can see, as advertised,

just two nice regular guys

looking to have some fun.

Well, just so you know, I'm all for spit

roasting, but what I'm really

here for is double penetration.

You guys up for that? Sure.

Okay.

And I don't care

which one of you gets the front seat,

which one of you gets the back seat?

I mean, we can flip a coin for it,

or just see who ends up where... So

in here or in the bedroom?

Uhh, the the bedroom.

I think... it's just

head and... To the left.

(music plays)

Well, what are you both doing over there?

Yeah.

Oh? (Nuhuh)

I want to see you to kiss first.

Oh, okay. Oh.

Oh. Huh.

Nuhuh huh, grab that.

Yeah.

Oh. No, you don't need those.

I'm on birth control.

And prep.

Yeah, no offense, but Im wearing one.

Yeah, me too.

Suit yourself.

Oh, you got any lube in there?

Now lie down.

Yes, ma'am.

Oh, oh f*ck.

Oh, oh.

Okay.

Now your turn.

Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, God.

Oh, I am fantastic.

Oh, now f*ck the sh*t

out of me, both of you.

Oh.

Oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

I can feel you.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Hey, guys, guys, I'm still right here.

Right, right.

Sorry.

Well,

your rhythm needs a little work,

but overall, it's a solid B

plus.

I didn't realize we were being graded.

Honey, you're always being graded.

Whether they tell you that or not.

Oh, well, I better go.

I'm going to pick up

my kids from the sitter.

You have kids? Yes.

Why wouldn't I?

I don't know.

You didn't mention it in your profile.

I mean, I'm not looking for a

boyfriend, so it's hardly relevant?

But, I would be up for a repeat play date.

If you both are?

Umm, I think we need to process this. It's

you were our first.

Yeah,

I could tell.

Well, text me if you want to go again.

Oh. Please, boys, relax.

I think I can find my way out.

(music plays)

Shower?

Yes. Please.

Soo... was that hot?

Or just sleazy? Both.

What do you mean? Youre just upset

We didn't get an A, arent you?

It was our first time.

We should have been graded on a curve.

We should change the sheets.

Ahhh! What's wrong?

I saw something move?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I think she gave us crabs.

And just like that, the balance

tips from hot... and right over

into sleazy!

Youre sure twice through is enough?

With all that bleach...

pretty sure?

I'm sorry.

I don't think I can do this again.

I know it was my idea.

I agree. We're going to have children soon.

We can't be bringing

strangers into the house.

And frankly, I don't

think I'm going to have

the time or energy to be dealing with...

Im not arguing with you. I get it.

But this was interesting,

fun, even Beau but...

I don't know how this can

fit into the rest of our lives.

Except that you're not going

to be happy with just me.

So where does that leave us?

I don't know?

I want to believe that I can be faithful.

I just don't know.

I don't want to make a promise

and then not be able to keep it.

So we're back where we started.

Except now we have crabs.

Good news!

Your spunk turned out

to be perfectly normal,

and we were able to

create five viable embryos.

Now all we need is a surrogate.

I'd be happy to help you find one.

Actually, we've got two

potential candidates.

My mother and my ex-girlfriend.

Are there any issues with a woman in

her mid-fifties carrying twins to term?

Yeah. I don't even know where to begin.

With all the issues you

two bring to the table.

Medical issues. Right?

Well, I would need to do

a thorough examination

and blood work before

I could say. Of course.

But a young, healthy woman in her early

thirties would be a much stronger Candidate

Right? Perhaps.

Dr. Nguyen I don't mean

to put you on the spot, but

we can't seem to come

to a decision about this.

I'm not thrilled about using his eggs.

He's not thrilled about using his mom.

And neither of us like the

idea of using a stranger.

Why dont we try this.

Bring both women in.

Let me examine them, and

then we let science decide.

Yes, that makes sense.

I agree.

(childrens music box plays)

(music)

(childrens music box plays)

I want to thank you both

so much for coming down.

Of course, you need

to be sure that I'm in tip top shape.

Ohh. I'm sure you are, Mrs.

Munoz,

but the fact remains that carrying twins

would put an enormous strain on your body.

I ran a marathon last year.

Have you run a marathon?

Well, no. Youre a

very sweet girl.

Candace, I always liked you,

but when it comes to strength

and endurance, it's really no contest.

I may not run marathons, but

I work out five times a week.

I'm in great shape.

I bet I'm stronger than you.

Why don't we just find out? Mom.

No. I am tired of being treated

like some frail old woman.

Ive been taking Krav Maga classes.

Whheewww!

You're not here to battle it out for

the honor of carrying these babies.

That's right.

The doctor's going to decide.

Whatever he says goes.

Okay,

Well, great job guys.

Both these women are excellent candidates.

Okay?

But one of them has to be a

better choice than the other.

Medically speaking, no. Oh, f*ck.

So now we have to make the decision, which

is going to make one of them mad at us.

I, I, I don't see why?

They're both obsessed.

My mom tried to arm wrestle

Candice, for Christ's sake.

No, no, no, no.

I don't see why they

both can't be surrogates.

Listen, you want two kids, right?

Twins are risky for both the women

and the kids. You let them both carry,

they're both happy. Double your chances,

minimize the risk.

I mean, the only downside I

could see is the added cost.

It might be the best of both

worlds. Or possibly even worse.

I don't think so.

Either way, they're going

to be part of our lives,

so why not make the choice

with the least amount of risk,

that will also make them both happy?

This is already

costing us a fortune,

which I can't help with.

Id rather spend the extra money

and have everyone happy and healthy.

Well, I don't suppose this

clinic offers a volume discount?

You guys supportive?

Totally. Good.

I'm glad.

So...

what excitement did

you get into this evening?

Oh, you know, the usual.

I had few strippers over, smoked some meth.

Hahaha, did you want

to do something like that?

One last time before the kids get here?

Strippers have never really been my thing.

And anything stronger than an

antihistamine scares the hell out of me.

What about you and your wild oats?

Any wild oats you want sow?

No. I think they've already been sown.

But I still can't promise

that years from now I...

Okay,

so don't promise.

Really.

But that wouldn't be fair to you. (sigh)

I think we've already

established life isn't fair.

True. But

I mean, could you really like that?

I think so.

I know you. You love me.

And if something happens apart from that,

maybe I don't need to know.

I'm not going to lie to you.

Not now, not ever.

So don't lie.

Just omit.

Look, I know you still jack off to hetero

p*rn. So do I. We don't talk about it?

This could be like that.

But if you bring home an

STD or get somebody knocked

up, I'll f*cking k*ll you.

Well, that seems fair. Hmm.

(knock at door)

Mom, are you okay?

We were starting to worry. Oh.

I'm so sorry I'm late.

I wasted time trying to

get your father to come.

Ohhh, he's never going to approve.

Hello, everyone.

Once these kids are here, no one is

going to dote on them more than he will.

Oh, I know, I know, Mom.

Just come on and sit down.

Well, I wholeheartedly approve.

I think you two are going

to make amazing parents.

Absolutely. And what can I get you?

Maybe a cup of tea.

.

I'll just have what everyone is having.

Ok, he's treating you like a pregnant lady.

They've been all over me too.

And everyone else is pretty much

having champagne, so you might as well

have them grab you a

cup of tea. It's no trouble.

Umm, green tea with honey, right?

Yes. Only if it doesn't

have caffeine, though.

I dont want to excite the

baby. That happens to you too?

Yeah,

If I have a coffee or even a coke,

this devil starts kicking

like a soccer player.

Oh have you guys figured out any names yet?

Yeah, we,

we made a list if you want help. Thanks.

Thanks, guys. But we've got this.

We're still figuring

out our son's name, but

our daughter will be Lily.

Sorry.

Pregnancy hormones.

So how about these...

presents?

You guys are cleaning up?

Oh, we are so grateful to all of you.

Yes, thank you for coming

and for supporting us in this um,

this crazy adventure.

And we hope you guys are going

to continue to be part of our lives

and our children's lives. Absolutely.

We're going to need a lot of help.

You got this man, and

we're always here for you.

You know that I want to

be a part of these kids lives.

At whatever level you're comfortable with?

You know, if you can

use time off, a night out.

You can call me.

I'm sure they will...

if we're not available.

And we can babysit.

Right, guys?

Absolutely. Of course.

Alex and I are great with kids.

We both got nieces and

nephews coming out of our asses.

Okay, that's great.

We'll keep you guys in my too.

You all are so sweet.

But really, it's not necessary

because we've raised twins,

so we know how to do it.

Okay, chill, everyone.

We've got two babies on the way,

so there will be plenty to go around.

As long as grandma gets first dibs.

You all heard it.

Grandma called dibs! Okay.

Now that that's settled,

let's see what goodies

we've got? Open mine.

Yes, mom.

Thank you.

Alright uhhh...

Ya thats right?

Wow! What! Look at that!

Look at that! So cute! Let me see!

These are beautiful. These are great!

What is? Oh, I love this.

This is going to be perfect.

Oh, yeah.

It's a diaper bag. Wow

it has a chin strap too!

Its a diaper bag! This is perfect.

I love it!

I can't believe another

year has gone by already.

This is kind of becoming a tradition.

Hello?

The twins are due in a couple

of weeks, it could be years before

we get back up here.

Maybe?

Maybe we can each bring one in those

cool papoose things.

They can come with us

when we celebrate and

remember Lily.

Can you hold this for a sec, I

just have something I got to do.

Pee break?

Be careful.

I saw some poison oak over there.

What are you doing?

You cant...

This isnt a pee break Beau

this is a proposal.

Beau, youve made me a very happy man.

Would you do me the honor

of making me your husband?

I thought you didn't want to get married.

I never really got married. The whole,

till death do us part thing

seemed so old fashioned, right?

I can't imagine my life without you.

And I want to show our kids

how much we love each other.

Oh they will know, because

they'll see it every day.

Oh, does that mean you

dont want to marry me?

No, it means I don't have to marry you.

I don't need a piece of paper.

But I do want to marry you.

Is that a yes? Can I stand up?

If I recall, that's

how it works. Uhhh?

Ah, are we hyphenating?

Is that code for something dirty?

Because if youre down for some nookie,

I am too.

We just have to steer clear of

the poison oak. No, no, our names.

So we have the same last names as the kids.

Oh, right.

The Stanton-Munoz family. I like it!

Or the Munoz-Stanton family?

Well figure it out.

(music plays)

...but Ill live with maybes

and wondering why.

If that means I still have hope.