03x02 - Don't Want It, Don't Need It, I'm Done.

Episode transcripts for the TV series, "The Kardashians". Aired: April 14, 2022 – present.*
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Reality series of the Kardashian family featuring Kourtney, Kim, and Khloé Kardashian and their half-sisters, Kendall and Kylie Jenner, and their mother, Kris Jenner.
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03x02 - Don't Want It, Don't Need It, I'm Done.

Post by bunniefuu »

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

KIM: Previously, on The Kardashians...

How'd your call go with Dolce & Gabbana?

Amazing. But it's a little

too soon after Kourt's wedding,

and I wanna wait a year.

I think it's such a good opportunity

that I don't wanna pass this up.

It's something to think about.
Why don't you talk to Kourtney about it?

Yeah.

I had a little...

-No.
-But I do have

something on my face here.

Turns out it's not a zit. It's melanoma.

They said they won't know
'til they open up my cheek,

how big they have to cut.

Even through all of the craziness

of everything that Kanye says about us,

I never comment.

You know, there's been a lot

going on with Kanye right now,

and things are going on in the media.

You got a divorce.

You did the only thing you could do.

I don't wanna talk about this anymore.

Let's talk about something else.

Everything.

♪♪

[LIGHT MUSIC PLAYING]

[CRYING] I don't wanna be
a part of this narrative.

And it's, like,
when is this ever gonna end?

Like, it never will.

And I'm stuck with this
for the rest of my life.

And I just, like...

I just, like, was so overwhelmed.

You, you can't control
somebody else, you know?

He's doing this to himself...

-But it affects my kids.
-But it's not... Of course, it does.

That's the, that's the tragic
part of the whole story.

[SNIFFLES, EXHALES]

It just, like, I still feel

the need to, like, not talk about it

and protect it for my kids,

and I always will feel that way,

but, like, God, if people knew.

I just would never do that

to my kids.

It just is really crazy.

And sometimes I feel like
if he were to hit rock bottom,

that's his journey that he needs to

figure out on his own.

They used to run around,

and call everyone behind his back,

and be like, "It's gonna be okay.

"It's gonna be okay, don't worry.

Just give him another chance."

I used to spend hours,
and hours and hours of my days

as the cleanup crew.

-Well, that's why you got divorced...
-You know?

...because you can't do that
to yourself anymore.

I just don't have that energy.

No, nobody does.

And nobody... You don't...

You never deserved to live like that.

It's, like, the hardest feeling

to watch someone you really loved

and you have a family with

just be so different than who you knew.

I mean, imagine trying to explain this

-to a nine-year-old.
-Yeah.

-At this point, North...
-Yeah.

...who I'm sure is hearing something,

and maybe she won't say it.

That's what breaks my heart.

She actually doesn't know,
and that's what's so crazy.

-Really?
-KIM: Is, like, when stuff is said,

it's a chain to my whole household.

No TV, only Apple TV.

I can't risk a Access Hollywood,

-"Coming up next."
-Or a news story.

Or anything on the news

coming up with their dad mentioned,

then they wanna watch.

I have to figure out a way to, like...

protect, and so, they still
haven't seen anything,

but I go into crisis mode.

I am the one...

being accused for so many things
and blamed for so many things,

and it really, really
is hurtful, and it sucks,

but I can control how I react,
and I can control...

If I'm a mess,

then... my kids will see that.

You have the most amazing family
that loves you so much.

We love you so much.

-There's nothing we wouldn't do for you.
-KIM: I know that.

I just hate that I bring the drama.

I really do believe
in my soul that, one day,

my kids will appreciate my silence,

my understanding and my grace,

and I will try my hardest

to keep it together at all times.

Thank you.

I love you... so much.

It feels weird to, like, cuddle
with you like this, but...

-It's okay. You'll... You'll get over it.
-I'm gonna do that with my kids.

-You'll get over it. You'll get over it.
-For sure.

-Thank you.
-Okay.

[SIGHS] That's all I needed.

Just one cuddle once in a while.

How can she not like
to cuddle with me? [LAUGHS]

♪ Rise up, oh, rise up ♪

♪ This is how you do it now ♪

♪ Stand up ♪

♪ To the right ♪

♪ Take the crown ♪

♪ This is how you do it now ♪

♪ Na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na ♪

♪ Na-na-na, this is how you ♪

KIM: All right, guys.

So the Dolce & Gabbana team

said they're gonna propose



and then 20 new looks.

So, it's 80 looks total,

and it'll be... me inspired.

I'm creative directing the

Spring 2023 Dolce & Gabbana
fashion show in Milan.

There's a lot that

goes into this, but as
the creative director, I mean,

I'm coming up with the looks,

everything down
to the accessories, the shoes.

And then they're gonna
reproduce the entire archives,

what I pick... to resell again,

but we can pick anything we want.

So Domenico Dolce
is gonna be here next week,

and I wanna be really prepared

'cause this is gonna be our first meeting.

So, with my team, I wanna really hone in

on what I think the vibe
of the show should be.

But, like, what are your favorite things?

As I was doing this, I was like,

I think that silver
is really my thing right now.

Or if we wanted a really fun, like...

crystal coat to the floor,

or something in that, like,

shiny crystal that they used to do.

KIM SCHRAUB: Yeah, that seemed
like it could work.

KIM: But I just picked
everything that I liked

from all of the '90s,
and then I went up into 2010,

and I didn't wanna go too 2000s.

This is a big deal to me.

It's the first time
I'm really gonna be independent

on doing any kind of...

fashion project.

I do SKIMS,
and I'm very confident in that,

but... I never thought I'd
have an opportunity like this,

and I love challenging myself.

It's like when I did SNL.
I stepped outta my comfort zone.

It wasn't what I did,
and I wanted to prove

that I can do it and I can do it well.

When they come out here, we're
gonna have less than a month.

SCHRAUB: Yeah, I don't know,
I don't know how they do it that fast.

TRACY ROMULUS: I don't know how
they're gonna do this, honestly.

Well, that's great.

I did have a conversation with Kourtney.

First, it was gonna be
a Dolce and SKIMS deal.

We couldn't get the product in time.

I did call her and say,
"Hey, the SKIMS factor is out.

I'm still gonna creative direct the show."

I don't know if she realized
how big of a deal that this was,

you know, and how big of a...

production this is.

Yeah, this is
a really massive undertaking.

I like it that it's quick,
and then it'll be over.

-I'm actually happy about that.
-I will say, we always work the best

-under pressure anyway, so.
-Totally, so I'm good.

♪ Let's do it ♪

[UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Why you only shut me down ♪

♪ Why you wanna turn me out ♪

♪ Why you wanna mess me up ♪

SCOTT: Hello?

KHLOÉ: You guys wanna go in the kitchen?

[COUGHS]

KHLOÉ: The hacker.

You're hacking? I mean... listen.

[SCOTT COUGHING]

SCOTT: Yeah, I'm stressed out.

I pray you don't do this on dates.

-Like, it is what it is with me.
-SCOTT: What dates?

-But, like, it's disgusting.
-Why don't we go on a date,

so you can see what it's like?

-You and me?
-Yeah, so you get the p-practice,

-and then, when you meet somebody...
-Scott,

I'm just gonna be honest with you.

If I went on a date with anyone
that hacked the way you did,

I would leave during the date. Like,

I can't handle that,
if I'm dating someone.

I'm trying to get rid of it for you.

Listen to this article.

It says, "This season's

"first episode was set
closer to the present,

"as Khloé reveals to the camera

"that she is to have a baby via surrogate,

"a state of affairs she had
been unwilling to discuss

"on camera throughout the process.

Re-emphasizes what we see
is what we are allowed to see."

I like to read things

to be up on what people are trying to say.

Like, I love getting
the feedback from everyone.

There was an article
about season two of our show

that said that Khloé didn't give

enough with her Tristan situation.

First of all, we filmed everything.

She shared everything.

With my surrogacy,
I was so [BLEEP] vulnerable.

It was... I let people in
to what I was struggling with.

-I wasn't...
-KIM: But what they were saying is that

you did it after the fact when
the baby was about to be born,

instead of saying,
"Hey, we're on this journey."

I wasn't admitting it
to myself what was happening,

-and I made that very clear.
-KIM: No, I know.

People are saying
that I don't share enough.

I mean, I potentially
have cancer on my face,

and I'm talking about that.

I do have to have a surgery,

and we will see how much spread,

and... if they can get it all.

Then it said,
"The rapper, now known as Ye,

Kim's ex-husband, is a non-presence."

Okay, what do you want me to do?

If I don't talk to him,
what am I gonna do,

send a camera?
It's not that I'm unwilling,

it's that the... m-my ex didn't wanna be

-on a reality show.
-But we know that.

You can't film with someone
that's not a cast member,

that doesn't have aspirations
of being on a reality show,

bottom line.

I talk about him.

I will definitely talk about

my co-parenting struggles,

but from my point of view.

Even in the dating conversation,

once there's a story about you,

you start to believe
the hype that you're together,

and, "Oh, my God," and this hot and heavy,

and it's, like, everywhere,

and everyone thinks
you guys are, like, practically

-getting married in a week.
-It literally becomes, like, real.

It's hard when you start

dating someone and you live
your life on a reality show.

So Pete and I had
that conversation right away.

You obviously know what
you're getting yourself into,

but then, like, the fans were
like, "Pete's not on the show."

And I was like,
"We said that from the start.

It's not... it's not what he does."

KHLOÉ: If I'm newly dating someone,

I'm not gonna have them
on the show, though.

If I'm newly dating someone,

-that's weird.
-KIM: Yeah, and...

then I opened up...

then I had him on the show.
I talked about, like,

-every last thing.
-Right. Like, what else do you want?

-What else... Yeah.
-To, like, see us in bed together?

I'm not gonna, like...
meet someone and be like,

"Pause, before we really get to a place,

will you be on my show?"

Like, no. And he was still on, guys.

Like, he's... He was on at what
level he was comfortable with.

KHLOÉ: I'll tell you something,
I have no guilt 'cause

I show so much about my life,

-and I'm an open book.
-SCOTT: [BLEEP] yeah, you always have.

And I do it in a very...
vulnerable, good way.

When we started Keeping Up,

all of us were 20 years old,
and had no kids,

and no lives, and this was
our only job and only career.

There wasn't even social media.

So, for anyone to even
want the same thing,

this is... now I know what it's like

when people would be like,

"I want the old artist back,
and I want the old... "

Like, no, people grow and evolve.

In a perfect world,
what would you guys want?

Would you wanna keep going
and everybody commit,

or would you wanna kinda
put the show on a back burner,

and just live your life without a camera?

♪♪

♪♪

No, we love filming. We love our show.

Like, it really... We... Khloé and I give.

I think this show is the centerpiece
to the whole franchise.

-Totally.
-SCOTT: You know, I think it's cool.

KIM: I just love doing this show because

I think that I look at it

as an opportunity
to, like, help other people

with what they're going through.

I mean, the amount
of... letters that I get,

"Oh, my God, you really helped me,

and how you managed this,
and how you went through this."

I love being able to show people a glimpse

of, like, what we do on a daily basis.

No matter what show we're on,
no matter what season...

-KIM: What?
-...the same old, it's you and me.

Khloé and I, we give real... content.

We're sharing
every last detail of our lives.

I talk about me wanting to lose weight

and I am brutalized.

I'm the [BLEEP] face of

all this criticism.

I mean, this isn't anything new, you know?

I just think, like, our show
is, like, what made us.

Like, I'll always wanna give it my all.

I'll always wanna... film,
and, and be a part of it,

and give everything that I can.

SCOTT: I'm available, guys.

Just so happens to be ya don't call me.

Just sayin'. I'm ready to go.

Put a wig on... and be one of the sisters.

-I should be a sister.
-[KHLOÉ LAUGHS]

Yeah.

♪♪

♪ Da, da, da, da, da ♪

♪ Da, da, da, da ♪

♪ Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da ♪

-PHOTOGRAPHER:
-We're gonna start in here. Perfect.

PHOTOGRAPHER: And then,
we'll be in this room first,

a couple different sh*ts here.

KOURTNEY: Perfect, and then we'll...

we'll change for that one?

[CROSSTALK]

Today, I am sh**ting
the photoshoot for WSJ Magazine,

also known as the Wall Street Journal.

I'm so excited 'cause we're doing

so much getting ready to launch Lemme,

which is my vitamin and supplement brand.

This has been years of work.

-Is it a touch too sweet?
-Ooh, an apple tea flavor.

I think it should be
a little bit more matcha

and less apple tea.

-Apple tea, okay.
-We can do apple tea

-for just a different one.
-SIMON HUCK: For a different one.

I wanted taking vitamins and supplements

to be something that people
can look forward to every day,

instead of, you know, like a chore.

And if it doesn't say,

"Let me fall in love" on the box.

-Like, if you just open it?
-Chicer?

-'Cause then someone could reuse the box.
-Reuse it, okay.

We didn't make any new plastic.

PCR.

Knowing that I'm taking something

that has clean, good-for-me ingredients,

and has a purpose, like,

it's just a more enjoyable process.

I think, at the core of the brand, is fun.

For October, it's focus immunity gummies.

-NIR LIBERBOIM: Yep.
-And vag*na?!

vag*na is big.

It's the cleanest vag*na gummy

-ever developed.
-With pineapple extract.

-KOURTNEY: Oh, my God.
-It actually makes your vag*na

taste sweeter.

And I am a perfectionist.

I want it to be the best that it can be.

That's also 'cause I'm passionate

and excited about it.

It's crazy, though, that literally

for five years you've wanted to do this.

When the energy in your life isn't right,

it's, like, hard to do something.

It's, like, the timing
couldn't be more perfect.

I've been wanting to do it for five years.

It just hasn't been the right scenario.

It was more deals with other brands,

and this is creating my own brand,

which felt overwhelming
as far as, like, ingredients,

and... you know,
making sure the quality's good,

and all of that, the packaging.

But, like, that seems...

it's a much harder task to take on,

so it was just the time

when I felt, like, ready to do that.

It's scary launching something

'cause people are also really

critical of us, specifically,

so I think it's, like, what if they

tear apart the packaging, the price?

Yeah... yeah.

Yeah.

KOURTNEY: I think it was,
like, the pressure,

mostly from Kim.

Like, "What's your business?

I have my thing and I have my thing,"

and then it's like, "But what's yours?"

I mean, Kim and I are 18 months apart,

so we definitely grew up,
like, more competitive.

Although, I've let that part go,

I'm not sure if she has. [LAUGHS]

I like to rage against the machine,

[LAUGHS] and, like, I don't know,

just not do what everyone's

asking of me or expecting of me.

I felt, like, true to myself,
taking my time,

and not rushing it just to get it out,

or on someone else's agenda.

It was, like, just doing it
when I felt like it was good.

Timing is everything.

Being in, like, a healthy,
happy relationship, I think,

was a big part of it.

I felt like I was
in this place in my life.

Like, I felt confident,

and I felt like I had all the answers,

so I've never had an easier time,

like, creating something, you know?

I think I've gotten to, like,
a good work-life balance, too.

I'm building something that

my kids can be proud of and be a part of.

It just, like... It feels like
what I'm supposed to be doing.

♪ I'm so hot, everything burnin' up ♪

♪ Shawty wanna touch
'cause she can't get enough ♪

-[CAMERA CLICKS]
-PERSON: You look like a sn*per.

-I look like a sn*per? Oh.
-[PHOTOGRAPHER LAUGHS]

I was like, "Am I making the...
my sn*per face?"

♪ Everything burnin' up ♪

♪♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ That's right ♪

♪ Uh, come on ♪

Thank you.

-Hey, Malika. Hey.
-MALIKA HAQQ: Hi, my love.

-KHLOÉ: How was your trip?
-Good.

-Good.
-Can I hug you?

-Of course, you can hug me, you freak.
-MALIKA: I'm scared.

-Why are you scared?
-MALIKA: Why is your bandage so big?

'Cause I have stitches all here,

and then they had
to do another biopsy here.

-Can we make it a little smaller?
-KHLOÉ: Mm-mm.

Also, talking like this
isn't really the best either.

No, you can, like, barely move.

I had to have the surgery
where they removed

the tumor from my face.

'Member, I had, like, this just tiny,

little dot on my face,

and they had to,
sort of, open up my cheek.

I guess when they were reviewing the labs,

a lot more than what
they thought had to be removed.

Then I just know I woke up,

and I had this huge bandage on my face,

and I couldn't really move my mouth

'cause I had stitches
on the inside of my mouth, too.

This was way more serious
than I... either understood,

or I anticipated it to be.

And so, what they just
don't know is if it's precancerous,

or if it already went to cancer,
and melanoma's deadly.

And it's a lot. Like,
the stitches was, like... crazy.

I mean, that's a lotta stitches.

-Yeah.
-KHLOÉ: It's a lot more than I thought

-was happening.
-MALIKA: No, it's a lot.

KHLOÉ: Disgusting.

MALIKA: The area is so much
bigger than I thought.

Mm-hmm.

By Wednesday,

I'll know if we have to do a second round

to make sure if there's
something else we have to do,

-and so, we'll know by then.
-[SOFTLY] 'Kay.

And then, just... I have to have
stitches for, like, two weeks

if we don't have to do a second round...

Why are you crying?

-[INAUDIBLE]
-KHLOÉ: What?

I can't laugh, so don't make me laugh.

I'm not making you laugh, you weirdo.

Come here. It's okay.

Why are we crying?

Because I don't like
to see you uncomfortable.

I'm fine.

I need you to be okay.

Oh my gosh, I'm fine.

When you have kids, you can't not be okay.

No, I-I get that,
but, sometimes, I know that

you just, like, pay attention
to everybody else, like...

Well, I didn't think this was a tumor.

Who would've thought that? Hmm.

I know.

This is a lot at once.

Like, you were supposed to get a break.

KHLOÉ: No, doesn't happen.

MALIKA: It, it didn't.

I need a little break. It'd be nice.

I'm definitely anxious about everything,
and now,

you just have to wait.

I think this is when...
When you're waiting on results,

is, sort of, when your mind
can just, like,

go to different places.

You start thinking, "Okay, well, what if
I do have can...

Like, what if the cancer did spread?"

And then you're like...
You just start thinking

these crazy things.
I just had another baby,

and you just, you know.

You just spiral into darkness.

MALIKJA: If I could tell you
some of the hardest times

that I've seen you going through...

-KHLOÉ: Mm-hmm.
-...in your life,

I think that this one is the closest

to when your father passed.

KHLOÉ: Really?

-Yeah.
-Oh my.

That's no bueno.

And that's what's the hardest for me...

-...because the hard... the hardest time
-Oh, my God.

that it was to be friends with you

was when your father passed
and I didn't know what to do.

Yeah, well that was a whole different...

MALIKA: And I feel like
I don't know what to do,

-but I don't...
-Oh my gosh, right now? Why?

-MALIKA: Yeah.
-Because the baby or 'cause of my face?

Not because of the baby...

-KHLOÉ: Yeah, no, not him.
-...but because of what

comes with the baby.

-Mm-hmm.
-MALIKA: I don't think I've seen you

this

low.

♪♪

I do know that
there's a piece of you that is

dealing with something so heavy,
or things that are so heavy,

and you're just going,
"I'm fine, I'm fine."

"I'm fine" is, like, your thing.

[KHLOÉ CHUCKLES]

MALIKA: But you have to, like,

deal with some of the traumatic stuff.

What-What's the traumatic stuff?

Um, I mean, maybe just
being a single mom to two

'cause that's a lot.

KHLOÉ: What she says is true.

I can be an ass-[BLEEP],
and I could block things out,

and I could just wanna laugh things off.

It's just how I cope with things.

I never said it was healthy.

I just said it's how I cope with things.

It would be probably like,

emotionally clearing and refreshing

if you just, like, had a good cry.

Like, [BLEEP], I hate this place.

-Mm-hmm.
-I hate all these things that are go...

Like, I'm, I'm being serious.

But then what does that do after?

You'll see after you're finished.

You have to try.

Oh my gosh, don't worry about me.

That's... Well, that's not gonna happen.

I can't... Can't get me down.

[QUIET LAUGHTER]

MALIKA: Stop.

-Stop, if you don't wanna laugh...
-They keep tryin'.

...don't make me laugh.

People keep trying.
You can't, can't take me out.

I'm here to stay.

Shut up.

♪♪

["BELLA BELLA BELLA"
BY STEFANO FUCILI PLAYING]

Let's go, team. Let's go.

We are in Milan.

A lot of the best makeup

in the world comes out of Italy.

PERSON: That's really amazing gloss.

They're gonna actually have that

for you in the lab to play with,

to mix your own shades.

KYLIE: I just feel like
it's really important

to see my makeup being made.

-Hi. I'm so excited.
-[ALL GREETING EACH OTHER]

-It's so beautiful.
-So nice to meet you.

KYLIE: Being here in Milan
is really important for that

because there's important

shade matching that has to go on,

just to make sure everything is perfect,

so I am just excited
to bring you guys along,

and show you how it's really made.

KYLIE: Yes.

KYLIE: I love makeup.

I think the science
behind it is also amazing,

and really seeing how it's made.

Takes a lot to make makeup,
people don't realize.

Kinda wanna drink it.

Makeup is very powerful.

It makes me feel powerful.

I love this shade.

I love to be creative,

and I don't know,

it's a form of expression.

That's so pretty.

I love my gloss.

I definitely knew when I was, like, 16

that this is what I really wanted to do.

I always had the most
fun makeup in school.

My mom had these
amazing sparkly eyeshadows.

Playing with my mom's makeup
into getting my own,

and it really, truly is a passion of mine,

so it's fun for me.

-Fun. I could do this all day.
-[PEOPLE CHUCKLING]

Khloé was always
really good at makeup, too,

and she would do my makeup,
sometimes, which was really fun,

but I think I just taught myself...

how to do my makeup.

A lotta trial and error.

And I think the fun thing about makeup is

you can't really be wrong.

Everyone does their makeup differently,

and I think that's the beauty about it.

Could we do a blush?
Like, a really pink blush?

Yeah.

The more pink, the better.

-LAB TECHNICIAN: More pink, huh?
-KYLE: Yeah.

-LAB TECHNICIAN: Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Can we make it more pink?

-LAB TECHNICIAN: It's possible. Yeah.
-Okay.

I think it was very inspiring,

very important for me to be here.

-Perfect.
-[PERSON GASPS]

-PERSON: Ohh! Gorgeous.
-KYLIE: Yes! Gorgeous.

I do feel like I can always
do more even though I'm 25.

I took a lot of personal time
in my early 20s.

I really wanted to be a young mom,

but I really feel like,
the rest of my 20s,

I wanna focus on work
and really dive into it.

And I think my mom
has just instilled in all of us

to be really hard workers.

I love it.

So blessed to be able to do

what I really love every day.

Perfect.

LAB TECHNICIAN: Thank you. Bye. Bye-bye.

♪ Hey, keep it comin',
keep it comin', comin' ♪

-♪ La la la la la la la ♪
-♪ Keep it comin' ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

-♪ La la la la la la la ♪
-♪ Keep it comin' ♪

-♪ La la la la la la ♪
-♪ Keep it coming ♪

SCOTT: P! Lovey's here.

KRIS: Hello?!

I'm not sure what happened

with Scott's car accident,

but Scott really gave us all
a really big scare.

He was on his way
to Kourtney's in his car,

and the entire car
flipped over, completely,

which is terrifying.

-SCOTT: What's going on?
-Good to see you. How are you feeling?

-Good. I'm just, like, a little bit sore...
-Yeah?

-but pretty good otherwise.
-I bet you are.

-Hi, P.
-Hi.

-How are you, honey?
-This is my daughter, Penelope.

KRIS: I know, I saw her yesterday,

and the day before, and the day before,

and the day before, and the day before.

SCOTT: P, I didn't know all this.

-It's a lotta action.
-KRIS: This is for you.

I thought since you
weren't feeling very good,

-that you would want...
-Is this a book?

Yeah, instead of flowers.

-'Cause I sent you a cake.
-SCOTT: Yeah, makes more sense.

Yeah, but it had dairy.

-Oh, right.
-SCOTT: After all these years,

you don't remember that I can't eat dairy?

-KRIS: I forgot about the dairy part.
-SCOTT: Yeah.

-Complain. Complain.
-I almost d*ed in a car accident.

-It was the thought...
-And then you tried to k*ll me

with the cake.

-Yeah. It's the thought that counts.
-It doesn't really work out.

I'm so relieved that Scott's okay.

I love Scott, and we all love Scott,

and Scott will always
be a part of our family.

He's the father of my grandchildren,

and he's just my kid.

Tell me what happened.

SCOTT: So I was goin' up to pick Mas.

We were goin' to a movie.

-KRIS: Right.
-I was just coming up,

and I was driving by myself,
which I was, like...

-Thank God.
-SCOTT: "Oh, thank God."

-I made a right.
-Yeah?

And then the curbs in that neighborhood

are not, like, flat curbs.

-KRIS: Right... right.
-They're kinda like little lips.

So, the wheel kinda
came into that little lip,

and it just, like, grabbed it, like,

made it, like, pull a little.

-Uh-huh.
-SCOTT: And by the time it pulled,

it just literally was like
[MIMICS CAR SPUTTERING]

and it smacked into a pillar.

But it basically hit,
and it did a somersault forward,

then hit, then landed.

[SOFTLY] Oh, my God.

-And you obviously had your seatbelt on?
-Oh yes.

But I was up there
strapped in and hanging.

-Oh.
-And then I couldn't get out,

and then I realized

-I'll try the sunroof.
-Oh, smart.

So I hit the sunroof...
and I moseyed on out.

Here's the car.

KRIS: Oh, sh*t.

Wow. It's a total.

You could not put that back together.

SCOTT: No, they totaled it out
the second they saw it.

KRIS: That must've scared
you. I feel so bad.

Good thing I got P.

She took care of me.

She got all the blood off of me
when she was there.

Blood?! He had blood?

He had a lotta blood.

-Really?
-She came down with a wet rag.

She got my face all done.

P was a big help.

Scott is a great dad.

He is so in love with those kids,

and you can just tell
that the relationship

that they have together is so delicious,

and that makes me really grateful

because family is really what
we value the most, in my house.

Well, I'm just glad you're okay.

-Your dad's like a cat with nine lives.
-[SCOTT HISSES]

He is one.

-Can we, can we get a cat?
-Come here, P. No.

-Why?
-I have allergies.

Listen to me and listen good,

you want a cat, I'll rent it for the day.

♪♪

-[GASPS] Wow.
-Hi. Welcome, Kylie.

Thank you.

Look at all Mommy's makeup.

Kylie Cosmetics
and Kylie Skin is in Harrods,

so we are in the UK.

We're in London to check out
Harrods and see my display.

Okay, what should we shop for?

You love this color. Cute!
Mommy hasn't been here before.

We need two of 'em,
one for me, one for you.

It means so much to me that my daughter,

she could be here, and...

see these displays with me,

and travel the world.

WOMAN: Can you gimme big smiles?

Big smiles!

Oh, you're so cute!

-Oh, you're so cute!
-[STORMI GIGGLING]

♪♪

KYLIE: Wow, this is so beautiful.

Me and Kendall...

WOMAN: I can't believe
you used to do those...

-...had a whole other life, by the way.
-WOMAN: That was so,

-like, overwhelming.
-And we used to shut down malls.

We would go to the mall
for meet-and-greets at PacSun,

and there would be thousands
and thousands of people

that would show up to this mall.

CROWD [CHANTING]: Kylie! Kendall!

KYLIE: You guys, when I tell you,

we were really cool.

I mean, we're cool now,

but we were, like, really,

really, really cool back then.

KENDALL [ON PHONE]: Hello.

KYLIE: We're in London now.

We're right now at Harrods
at, at a little tea time.

I was just telling Fai
how cool you and I were

when we used to do
our PacSun mall meet-and-greets.

[LAUGHS] Kylie!

And thousands...

And thousands...

-It doesn't have any nuts.
-KYLIE: No nuts?

Try eating the top.

KYLIE: What about pistachios? Cashews?

-No, it doesn't contain any nuts.
-KYLIE: Okay.

I love when you call me
just to not talk to me.

I'm sorry, they just
handed Stormi chocolate.

I needed to make sure there wasn't nuts.

KYLIE: 'Kay, eat the top.

I miss those days, too.

No, it's...

[LAUGHS] It tripped me out.

Um, all right. Well, I love you guys.

I love you, too.

Have so much fun. Call me whenever.

Call me.

-Should we chug this?
-WOMAN: Yeah... go.

I was able to come here
and see my makeup being made,

visit Harrods for the first
time, and see my displays,

and it's just been so special.

-Cheers.
-KYLIE: I definitely feel inspired,

and I'm ready to get back to work.

International Kylie Cosmetics.

-Kylie world tour.
-FAI KHADRA: Kylie world tour.

-[LAUGHS]
-KYLIE: You're the best.

Yes, you are.

♪♪

KRIS: Can I make you a tuna sandwich?

-KHLOÉ: No.
-Okay.

I love your Good American.

I've got Travis Scott shoes,
Good American jumpsuit.

-Let's see... Oh, a SKIMS bra.
-Mm.

I'm representing.
And SKIMS under-underwear.

-I was wearing those shoes earlier.
-KRIS: You were?

[GASPS]

Shoes on the counter

-where you eat...
-Okay.

...is, like, the biggest pet peeve

-of my life.
-KRIS: Hey, listen.

No.

That is so...

You want your nasty shoes

that are outside walking in poop,

bugs, dirt, urine, vomit,
God only knows what.

Mom.

Your shoes go right
in those public bathrooms,

step on someone's period blood
and nasty [BLEEP],

and then you're walking around,

and you're takin'
your cute, little sneakers,

and you put it on a counter.

It's so [BLEEP] gross.

She can't think that's okay.

I don't know. I mean,

everybody has their own five-second rule.

You drop a cookie, ya put a dirty binky

back in the kid's mouth.

I don't know.

I'm never eating there again.

God only knows what happens there.

Anyway. Well.

You know what I was thinking?

-Wanna hear my plan?
-Oh, gosh.

-The master plan.
-Would love to. [CLEARS THROAT]

All of this, I think,

and the scare that we've all been through

with your situation here

is reminding me
that we have to get less stress

and... be kinder to our bodies.

KHLOÉ: I think when you think of a tumor,

I think of, like,

-this big thing hanging from...
-KRIS: Khloé!

-That's what I do. I just didn't think...
-KRIS: I know.

But that image just gives me chills.

He said it could've spread at any minute.

He was like, "It's crazy."

Oh, my God.

KHLOÉ: That's why they rushed me to do it.

But yeah, but I mean,
the relief of knowing

that everything's gone,
it's all outta my system,

-it's good.
-Yeah.

This? Never thought for a second
it was a tumor on my face.

Like, never, never, never.

My doctor got the pathology report back,

and we got the entire tumor,

all my margins are clear,

and I'm so relieved, so happy.

And all I have is a scar
that I will figure out later.

And, you know,
so many people aren't as lucky,

and I feel really fortunate
and really blessed.

But let me tell you,
having the stitches removed

from inside my mouth,

how I can talk and eat pretzels now.

I know. When you couldn't talk...

-KHLOÉ: That was not fun.
-No.

I know Khloé always keeps
all of her feelings inside,

and she doesn't want
anybody else to worry,

but I know how worried she was.

Any time we have to wait
in life for anything serious,

it's painful, and you feel helpless.

KHLOÉ: Not being able to eat
was the worst part for me

'cause I like to eat.

That was the most annoying.

Was all stitched up.

KRIS: Khloé is such a love

and the heart of the family,

and I've never prayed so hard in my life.

It's, sometimes... not easy,

but I'm just happy it's over.

She got very, very lucky.

It's just such a relief.

The fact that they got everything,

and there's no concern over...

-KHLOÉ: No.
-...what's inside,

-and the rest is just...
-Everything's gone.

-KRIS: You know?

-KHLOÉ: Well, I'm good.
-I mean, just to think of what...

-Thank God. It's such a relief.
-KHLOÉ: Everything's great.

-I say my prayers for you every day.
-That waiting process was

super not fun. [LAUGHS]

I would hope you say your prayers

-for me every day, regardless.
-KRIS: Well, regardless.

-But I'm just saying,
-'Cause you're my mommy.

when you have something...

Oh, my girl... I love you so much.

-KHLOÉ: Oh, I love you, too.
-It makes me appreciate you... so much.

-Now I'm... on the mend.
-KRIS: Ready to go?

Aw, my bunny.

I'm just so, so happy.

-KHLOÉ: Obviously!
-I know.

I feel like... I've gone
through a lot recently,

but

bring it on.

From now... anything negative,
return to sender.

[BLEEP] all you guys.
You're not welcomed here.

Don't want it. Don't need it. I'm done.

All right, I love you. I gotta go.

-KHLOÉ: Love you.
-Have fun.

I'm glad you're good. I love you.

-KHLOÉ: Of course.
-It makes me so happy.

Oh, it makes me just as happy.

♪♪

Ciao.

-KRIS: Hi.
-KIM: Hi.

When I think of creative directing a show,

I think of everything.

I think of what the show looks like,

what the models look like,

what the makeup and hair look like,

from stage design to music production.

It's more of the overall picture.

-Bellissimo.
-It's gonna be so exciting.

So this is really outside
of my comfort zone

as far as designing,

but I'm prepared for this meeting,

and I know exactly what I want.

NORA FLAHERTY: I think, I think for,

for Mr. Dolce and Mr. Gabbana,

we want Kim... This is very much her show,

so it's very important that she's

a part of every single aspect.

I-I think we need...
I know from my experience,

and from Dolce & Gabbana experience,

we need some new, exciting history

because for me and Stefano,

Dolce & Gabbana's like my children.

It's my baby. It's no... it's no company.

Like, now, my children is big, is 18.

-He go out and need to work alone.
-KIM: Yeah.

-Nah, this the first time...
-I'm so happy it's with me.

When Domenico tells me

that Dolce is his baby, I get that.

Like any business, let alone their empire,

that is what they have built,
and that is his baby.

I mean, there's, like,
a lotta pressure there.

Love. Love.

As far as what Kim's wearing
in her everyday life,

like the M-Micro Sicily
is probably... Like, it's so her.

KIM: Danielle is my stylist.

And so, especially for this Dolce show,

I want everything to look really...

styled, very like me.

It just really helps to have
her as my, like, partner

to go through every single look together.

And I think that, like, the customer

will love to buy the looks that I wore.

-DOMENICO DOLCE: Exactly. Yes.
-I think they'll just appreciate that.

It feels like this is
a new, empowered side of me.

So I'm sure that we want the crystal mesh.

-Let's do it.
-Okay, with silver or red?

Silver, not red.

I feel like I have a good pulse

on what people will wanna wear,

and that's a big deal to me
because, not too long ago,

I honestly didn't even know

if I could dress myself. [CHUCKLES]

I guess I just get so, like,
nervous, like,

"Oh, will people wanna see...
me all over the screen,

like, is that... " You know what I mean?

I just... I get personally
nervous about it.

GUI SIQUEIRA: Can I say something?

Um, I understand where you're coming from

about having your images, like,
not to look narcissistic of you,

but I also understand that

this is Dolce & Gabbana celebrating Kim.

So you are their inspiration
in this... moment.

Kim is asking them nothing.

They want to honor the biggest
pop star in the world,

is Kim Kardashian,
and that's what they want to...

-DOMENICO: It's true.
-It's the truth.

For me to do a project like this

just means so much to me.

Like, it really, really, really does,

but I am a little worried
about Kourtney just because

I'm never gonna fight
with family, bottom line.

I don't know, like,

I just don't want this to k*ll my vibe.

So...

let's talk about it.

Next on The Kardashians...

My friends wanted me to meet someone.

Let's call this guy Fred.

-[KIM LAUGHS]
-Does he meet the standards?

Oh, so meets the standards.

Yep.

KOURTNEY: I feel anxiety only about
the press part of New York.

CREW MEMBER: Thirty seconds back!

Like, why did I agree to this?

CREW MEMBER: Five, four, three.

I think now,
it's, like, a fear of judgment.

Does anyone have dr*gs?

How's everything going with Tristan?

For my kids,
I will put anything to the side.

-Yeah.
-KHLOÉ: What's done is done.

Like, I'm a control freak,

-and my, my therapist tells...
-Same, we all are.

-I know.
-And it comes from you.

-KENDALL: I know, it does.
-It's a good quality.

Everything, everything is my fault.

Name something, it's my fault.

DANIELLE LEVI: What a [BLEEP] nightmare.

My stylist forgot her passport.

Who's supposed to be
dressing me the entire time.

We have three days 'til the show.

DOMENICO: I'm not crazy for this.

-MAN: Kim, what do you think?
-KIM: I don't know.

I would talk to Danielle.

We don't even have one look put together.

What do I do?

I don't know.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ You got a strange way of
sayin' what you're thinkin' ♪

♪ It's hard to understand ♪

♪ You say you want me but
you're never gonna need me ♪

♪ You can't and then you can ♪

♪ Why you only shut me down ♪

♪ Why you wanna turn me out ♪

♪ You're just playin' with my heart now ♪

It's so [BLEEP] gross.

Ugh!

People didn't start washing their hands

until COVID came around.

They had to teach people

how to wash their hands.

Teach people!

There's reminders in all the bathrooms,

and people touch their little dingalings,

and they don't wash their hands.

Sick!

Ugh!

So I know half of you people

are putting your shoes
on the [BLEEP] counter.

Anything else?

[BELL TOLLS]
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