01x05 - Snap Out of Water/Two Left Feet/Rudus Tabootus/All Day Jam

[bunniefuu]

Rudy's got the chalk.

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ the chalk, the chalk,
chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ the chalk, chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ the chalk, the chalk,
chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk,
the chalk ♪

Rudy's got
the chalk.

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ the chalk, the chalk,
chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ the chalk, chalkzone ♪

Rudy's got
the chalk.

♪ The chalk, chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ the chalk, the chalk,
chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

Rudy's got the chalk!

♪ The chalk, the chalk,
the chalk, chalkzone ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ Rudy's got the chalk ♪

♪ chalk, chalk, chalk,
chalk, chalk ♪

♪ chalk, chalkzone! ♪

[children talking]

Ow!

Ha ha!

Hey!

[Toot toot]

Come on, Rudy!

A new island just showed up
in the wait 'n sea.

Here I come.

Huh!

There it is,
Rudy.

Thanks!

Hey, Rudy, draw us a fire.

I brought us
some weenies we can roast.

Ok.

Aw, you can do
better than that.

That's more like it.

[Crash]

Wha-what was that?

Oh, that was
probably just, uh--

[crash]

Whoa! We're really
in trouble, snap.

I'll say.
These weenies will never
get cooked at this rate.

Hey!

Whoa!

Yow!

Oh, hello, penny.

Snap, what are
you doing here?

Where's Rudy?

You shouldn't
be here, snap.

You've got to go
back to chalkzone

before someone sees you.

Whoa.

Wait a minute,
penny.

I've got some
exploriatin'
to do first.

So, where does Rudy sit?

Oh, there he is.

And there I am.

And unless I miss my guess,

this is Reggie bullnerd's
place of business.

Huh?
[Bell rings]

Snap, you have to hide!

Oh, my gosh!

The chalkzone entrance.

Ok, class, be seated,
and let's get started.

[Gasp]

What's this?

Someone's been doing
rude drawings again!

You know how I feel
about cartoons!

Bullnerd: Hey!

What numbnoodle
mussed up my desk?

It will take me a month
to reorganize.

Mr. Bullnerd, your desk
is always messed up.

Oh, well,
all right, then.

Let's quickly
take attendance.

Reggie bullnerd.

Bullnerd: What?!
Oh, here.

Ted latrine.

Yo.

Boris freemis.

Here.

Penny Sanchez.
Present.

Rudy tabooti.

Uh...here!

You're not Rudy.

Mr. Wilter, Rudy is
participating in, uh,

a-a foreign
exchange program,

and this is his
replacement snap, uh...

Um...uh...white!

Snap white.

And what country
are you from, Mr. White?

Uh...greenland.

Excusez-moi?

But if you're from Greenland,
why are you blue, right?

Because it's
very cold there,
Reggie bullnerd.

Oh, sure.
Makes sense to me.

Oh, yeah, Greenland.
I knew that.

You see, Reggie?

You should pay more attention
to geography.

Yes, Mr. Wilter.

Hey, blue smudges.

Hey!

You messed up my desk!

I will meet you
after class

and teach you
some local customs.

Aw, pshaw.

All talk,
that's what you are.

So, penny, what do you want
to do after school today?

Why doesn't Rudy come back
and get us out of this?

Because he's
having too much fun in
chalkzone, that's why.

[Bell rings]

Where's the fire?

We have got to get you
out of here fast.

Hello, blue boy.

Hi.

I hope you have not
forgotten about our
appointment outside.

Wilter: Reggie...

I warned you about
that messy desk.

Now you stay after school
and straighten up this room!

Doooh!

You stay here.

I'll come get you
once bullnerd
has left.

Now, don't move!

Hey,
what's that?

You can leave as soon
as you've cleaned off
the chalkboard, Reggie,

and don't forget to dust
the erasers this time.

That blue kid is
probably halfway back
to Greenville by now.

[Gasp]

This game was tougher
than it looked.

That blue kid is going
to be black and blue

when I get him.
Ha ha ha!

Snap!

Oof!

Oh, I am so sorry.

Are you ok?

Well, I could have been
seriously injured

if you weren't
so soft and doughy.

Thank you.

Rudy: "Rudy, help!

"Snap is in fight...

With bullnerd!"

Bullnerd? Where?

"At school, silly.

Draw new hole."

Oh, ok.

All:
Greenland, Greenland, Greenland!

Come on, Reggie,
gimme your best sh*t.

I won't even move.

Coming up, blue baby.

Yow!

My hand is smashed.

Waaah, mommy!

Nurse!

Tough guy, huh?

Yay!
Yay!
Yay!

[Grunting]

Ooh!

Miss me?

Rudy,
come on!

Thank you, thank you.
You're too, too kind.

Time to go home, snap.

Are you kidding?

This place is great!

They love me here.

[Thunder]

What is that?

Aah!

What kind of a horrible
place is this?!

Well, I suppose
this has been enough
adventure for one day.

But at least I wasn't
goofing off all day

like someone
I could mention.

Say, uh, Rudy--
could you give me a hand?

Sure.

Thanks.
See ya.

Well, that takes
care of that.

Ah, hello, Rudy.
How was Greenland?

I expect a full report
about it from you tomorrow.

Huh?

Bullnerd: Nurse!

Square dance tonight!

Spin and get lucky!

[Square dance music
playing]

Ah, heh heh heh!
Hi, snap.

Shhh, blocky!

Queen rapsheeba's about
to come on to call
the square dance.

Ohh, I sure do like
her music.

♪ Hey there, zoners,
how's it poppin'? ♪

Pop, pop, pop, pop,
pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop!

♪ Ok, ok, I now declare ♪

♪ it's time to see
some dancing squares ♪

♪ where's ♪

♪ the squares? ♪

♪ Over here, over there,
get out of your chair ♪

♪ 'cause the time has come
to be a dancing square ♪

♪ blocks and cubes
and parallelograms ♪

♪ get on the floor
and shake your gams ♪

♪ boxes and steps
and dictionaries ♪

♪ magazines,
movie screens, tvs ♪

♪ get up, get busy,
'cause here's your chance ♪

♪ put just the right angle
on the old square dance ♪

[Hip-hop playing]

Rectangle: Hey, what are you
doing on the dance floor?

Rectangles:
Get out of here...b*at it.

Snap, will you be
my dance partner?

Look, blocky,
just because you were
Rudy's first drawing,

don't think
I'm gonna give youse
any special treatment.

Oh, all right, come on.

[Snap whistles]

Steer stomach
on a stick here.

It's popcornfed.

Come along, little dogies,

and get your popcornfed
steer stomach on a stick!

Whoa, hold on to
your poppers, zoners!

[Music stops]

Clumsy feet!

You've ruined
the square dance. Ugh!

Hey, hey, hey!
You guys shouldn't be
on the dance floor.

I mean, not only
are you clumsy,

you're not square.

I know, I know,
it ain't fair.

But you gotta move along
and let the squares

get back to
the square dance.

Ow!
Hey, watch it!

Wow, I see
what they mean

about having
two left feet.

Yeah.

Those feet need
to be taught a lesson

by someone who can really
go toe-to-toe with them.

Say, I know
just the mudkickers

to put those two feet
in their place.

No more Mr. Tendertoe.

It's steel toed slim
and his trusty sidekick lefty.

We heard there
was some trouble
at the square dance.

Yeah.

These two are gonna
give those feet a lesson
they'll never forget.

[Gasp]

[Techno music playing]

[Square dance music
playing]

Well, they can dance now,
but they're still not square
enough to square dance.

What we all need
is a line dance, so
everyone can participate.

Snap's right,
as usual.

Of course I am.

We want everybody out here
on the dance floor,

and that goes especially
for you lines.

Line: Yeah!

[Lines cheering]

♪ Now chew your gristle
and gulp and swallow ♪

♪ s*ab your sausage
and bite your dough ♪

♪ fry those giblets
and scrape that grill ♪

♪ spread that gravy
and eat your fill ♪

♪ everyone here
is doing just fine ♪

♪ circles and squares
and feet and lines ♪

♪ we love to see 'em
jump and prance ♪

♪ and we're all together
at the new line dance ♪

Yeeee-haw!

Now that's what I call
"hoofin' it."

[Kiss]

Man, Italian accent:
And here is the famous
colosseum,

where I think
they fought the lions

and had the gladiators
and the chariot races

and lots of cool stuff
like that.

Rudy: Wow! The colosseum.

Gladiators, chariots--ahh.

I've always wanted
to be in a chariot race.

Mom, dad, look!
It's the coloss--

ha ha ha ha!

Oh, take 'er
easy there, son.
I see it.

They're serving genuine
Italian prosciutto
at that stand.

Yum-my.

Well, I've got my eye
on that beautiful
zucchini over there.

But don't you want
to see the--

well, ok ,then.

I'll just go and see
the colosseum myself.

Wow, this place
must be ancient.

Oh, ancient
chalk drawings,

and it looks like
a chariot race.

Hmmm...

[Crowd cheering]

[Fanfare]

All right!

Huh...whoa!
[Growl]

[Roar]

[Crowd boos]

Waaaah! Ooh!

Rudy: A chalk gladiator?

Aah!

[Screaming]

Man: No way, brucius!

Woman:
He went for the urnagain?

[Roar]

Back when I was
proving myself,

I never behaved
in such a manner!

[Farts]

If I had behaved
that way,

I never would
have become...

[Farts] Champion
charioteer.

Oh, yes, odiferus,

I think you've made
that point rather well.

[Roar]

Woman: What is this?

There's a strange boy
in the arena.

[Crowd jeers]

Rudy?!

Um, nice pussycat.

Um, wanna play?

[Roar]
Whoa!

Woman: Bravo!

Whoooh!
Who's that gladiator

with just a piece of chalk?

I don't know, my lord.

Hey!

[Roar]

[Crowd cheers]

Thank you,
thank you.

[Roar]

Snap: Hey, Rudy!

Remember what you told me
about the circus?

Snap?

The circus, Rudy.
Think! The lion tamer!

You know,
the hat, the chair,
the whip, and the--

oh, yeah.
This should do it.

Ha ha! All right!

[Roar]

[Meow]

Oh ho ho ho!

Odiferus,
I must meet this
young gladiator

who dares to
take on the lion.

But it's not
that impressive,
my lord.

Snap:
Don't push it, Rudy.

Quit while you
still have a head.

Both: Ha ha ha ha ha!

Crowd: Ha ha ha ha ha!

Well, I'm impressed.

Ha ha!
Bring me that boy.

Well, you heard
the little man.

Hop to it!

So, what are you
doing here?

I saw this here poster
about ancient Rome,

so, you know,
veni, vidi, vici--

here I am.

Ancient Rome?

Then these chalk
drawings must be
thousands of years old.

Snap: You know,
the chalk Roman empire

lasted a lot longer
than the real one.

Oh ho ho ho!
Bravo, bravo!

Your heroic display
is most impressive.

Tell us your name,
young gladiator.

Rudy tabooti,
your highness.

Nice digs
you got here!

Yoik!

How dare you speak to
the emperor that way!

No, no, odiferus.
Let him go.

These are our guests.

[Choking]
Yeah, yeah,
you heard the man.

Fine.

So pleased
you could join us.

Rudus tabootus,

you are a lad
of great courage
and abilities.

Oh, thank you,
your highness.

I would be honored
if you would sit
at my right hand

to watch today's
chariot race.

What? What?!

[Farts]
What?

[Sniff sniff]

Oooh.

But,
your highness,

as champion
charioteer,

it is for me
and me alone

to sit at
your right hand.

Yes, I know,

and you have been
poisoning the atmosphere
here for 2,000 years.

I want rudus tabootus
to sit beside me now.

Well, uh, thanks,
your highness,

but I'd really much rather
bein a chariot race.

Ha ha ha
ha ha ha!

You, a mere boy?

In a chariot race?
Ha ha ha!

I think it's
a splendid idea.

What?!
[Farts]

But--but
it can't be!

I mean--i mean,
look here.

The law specifically
states...Aha!

Ah, yes,
here it is.

"In order to compete
in a chariot race,

a charioteer must
prove himself
in the arena..."

Oh, rudus tabootus
has done that.

"And have logged
a minimum of
72 hours

in a chariot
going round

and round and around
and around and round

and round and round
and round and round.

But you forgot
about this, odiferus:

"If a boy measuring 4'7"
should magically appear
and defeat a lion

"using only
a piece of chalk,

that boy will be
allowed to compete
in a chariot race."

Well, then, it's settled.

The race will begin
in half an hour.

Come on, Rudy.

Let us go
grease up the wheels
of old Jupiter.

So be it.

You will race this
rudus tabootus,

and if he wins,
he will be champion
charioteer.

No one has ever
defeated me...

And no one ever will!

[Farts]

Snap: Ok, rudus,
while you're at it,

why don't you make us
a turbocharged chariot

with about
150 horsepower?

Nope, I'm gonna win this race
fair and square.

Aw, come on, Rudy.

That odiferus has been round
and round and round.

This is our first time.

You gotta give us
some kind of edge.

No way.

Ben-hur didn't cheat,
and neither will I.

[Fanfare]

[Crowd cheers]

Man: Rudus!

[Horse neighs]

[Hoofbeats]

[Horse neighs]

[Neigh]

[Crowd roars]

Snap: Hold your nose.
We're gaining on him!

We'll see about that.

[Farts]

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!
Ah ha ha ha ha!

[Crowd jeers]

Cheating, cheating, cheating!

[Gasp]

Whoa,
Rudy!

Use...the...chalk!

I only have
two hands, snap.

[Horses neigh]

Does this thing
have a spare tire?

Right here.

Hurry!

Coming right up.

Ohhh, goody, goody, goody,
goody, goody, goody, goody,
goody, goody.

Snap:
Holy spokes, nice job.

Huh? Oh, no, you don't!

Oh, we're going
the wrong way!

Rudy, can you
throw it in reverse?

Hang on, snap.

[Crowd gasps]

Oh, no!
They're going to crash.

Hey, what the--

my horses
are behind me now?!

We can't let him win
with rear-wheel drive.

Oh ho ho ho!

Get ready to
eat it, odiferus.

Not a chance,
chalk boy--ha ha!

Ah ha ha ha ha ha
ah--

[farts]

Aah! Oh! Eeh!

[Crowd cheers]

Odiferus: Aaaah! Mommy,
mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy!

Oh!

Whoo! Yes, yes, yes,
yes, yes, yes, yes!

Crowd:
Yay, rudus! Yay!

Rudy and snap: Thank you,
thank you, my people.

Thank you so much.

I gotta get back
to real Rome, snap.

My parents must be
worried sick.

Besides, my dream
has come true.

I've been in a chariot race.

Snap: Not just that,
my friend.

You'vewon
a chariot race.

All right, Rudy,
you get on back.

I'll cover
for youse.

Thank you--
thank you so much!

Rudus tabootus,
I hereby declare
you the winner and--

where is rudus tabootus?

Mom: Rudy!

Hi.

Oh,
there you are!

You gave us quite
a scare, Rudy.

Aw, there was nothing
to be scared of, dad.

I just fought a lion
and won a chariot race.

Both:
Ha ha ha ha ha!

Mom: Oh, Rudy.

You do have the most
active imagination.
Ha ha ha!

Dad: I'll say, son.

You know,
you should be a writer.

[Hard rock music playing]

♪ I lug it in and I plug it in ♪

♪ and I crank right up to 12 ♪

♪ I swing off on my strings
and they go... ♪

♪ My keyboard's
always grinnin' at ♪

♪ a joke
it never tells ♪

♪ but we share
all our secrets
when we... ♪

♪ It's an all ♪

♪ day ♪

♪ jam ♪

♪ it's an all ♪

♪ day ♪

♪ jam with the band
and we're takin' our stand ♪

♪ and we're makin'
our brand of music ♪

♪ my drums sure take
a beatin' ♪

♪ chugga-lugga-boom-boom-boom ♪

♪ you knock them down,
then turn around with... ♪

♪ It's an all ♪

♪ day ♪

♪ jam ♪

Aaah!

Whoo!

♪ It's an all ♪

♪ day ♪

♪ jam with the band
and we're takin' our stand ♪

♪ and we're makin'
our brand of music for you! ♪