02x22 - Treasure Hunt

[bunniefuu]

I'm just heading to the fields, duke.

I'll be back.

[Engine rumbling]

Clear!

[Rocking square dance music]

All right!

♪

Ratabunga.

♪ From the haystacks

♪ Up to the hilltops

♪ We're going dancing...

Whoo-hoo!

Ow. Ow.

Okay. Ow. Ow!

♪ Do-si-do your partner now

♪ There's a party till the morning light ♪

♪ Do-si-do

♪ And don't you know

♪ It's just the way we animals roll ♪

[Motorcycle revving]

Ha-ha!

[Rollicking instrumental music]

♪

[Blows whistle]

Ten-hut!

Look alive, people.

Freddy, stop drooling.

Duke, spit out that ball.

Peck, get that wattle up.

Abby, shine those udders.

Pig, suck in that gut.

Okay. Which one?

Good point. Never mind.

Troops, we've had a bountiful corn harvest this year.

Corn!

Those crows will stop at nothing to get that corn.

What about the new scarecrow we put up?

You mean this one?

[Gasping]

I don't have to tell you that without corn,

The farm goes bankrupt.

And no farm means no us,

So we've got to stop those crows.

Pip, anything on the radar?

Just some clouds, a stray balloon,

And a french-canadian att*ck helicopter.

Excellent.

You see, they wouldn't dare try anything as long as I'm a--

French-canadian att*ck a what?

Ha ha ha!

Battle stations, people. This is not a drill!

Ow. Get out of my way!

The corn is ripe for the plucking, eh?

Bonjour, stupid animals.

We claim your corn in the name of canada!

This is what we trained for, people.

Freddy, peck, give 'em what you got.

You got it, otis.

Cabbage in the hole!

[a*tillery fire]

[Muttering in french]

[Laughs]

You call that aim?

Vite, mon ami, vite!

Abby, keep the pressure on.

You got it.

Load me up, duke!

Pig, it's all you!

Aaaagh!

[Laughter]

In your stupid american faces!

People, talk to me!

The cannon's jammed.

I'm all out of a*mo!

Oh!

Aaaagh!

Abby, sh**t me up there.

Otis, no! It's too dangerous.

I said sh**t me. Now, that's an order, soldier!

I can't. I won't.

Don't make me say it aga-- aaaah!

Splat!

[Laughs]

Eh?

Yippie-ki-ay, frenchy.

Yee-haw!

Crunch!

Way to go, otis.

You're like a space cowboy or something.

You saved the corn.

Yeah, but they still have their helicopter.

Not for long!

Uh-oh.

[Coughing]

This is not good.

Whoa!

Together: viva la canada!

[Massive expl*si*n]

What a sh*t!

All right!

Aaaugh!

Ponk!

Sorry.

That cow is really beginning to tick me off.

Oui. He's really annoying.

Don't worry, mes amis.

I was prepared for this

And have devised a plan of great cunning.

But I will need the following things:

A fake map...

Oui? Fake map, oui?

A pirate outfit...

Very good. I am liking this plan.

A human skeleton...

Excellent.

And a shovel.

Heh? A shovel?

Where are we going to get a shovel?

You had me, and then you lost me.

Just do it.

Oh, okay, and then I says,

I says, "yippie-ki-ay, frenchy!"

Yes, you told us many times.

Did I mention how awesome it was

When I bit through the rope with my teeth?

If we say yes, will you stop talking about it?

Probably not. Anyways--

Otis, check it out.

Ooh, looky here.

Come back for some more butt whooping?

Non, monsieur, we have come to surrender.

We are no match for your superior fighting skills, eh?

Please accept this traditional french-canadian

Peace offering and our apologies.

Hold on, otis.

Better test that.

Yep, it's good.

I knew you jerks would see reason.

You just have to understand that a farm's corn is sacred.

Well, yes, we know that now.

We are sorry.

Very sorry.

Oh, and by the way, that frosting is made of our poop.

[Laughter]

Oh, you guys are dead!

Pig, I thought you said it was fine.

It is.

Are you seriou--oh, yuck. Come on!

Run away! We already have one!

That's right! You better run!

Whatever you do, don't chase us over here!

Oh, you are slow.

When I catch you guys, I'm gonna--

Aah! Freshly dug hole!

Thud!

What the heck happened?

I think we fell in a really deep hole.

You think maybe the crows dug this hole

So we could fall in it?

What? Don't be ridiculous.

Where would they possibly get a shovel?

Good point. Well, let's start climbing--

Aaaah!

Come on, pip, stop fooling-- around!

It's the burial ground of the village people!

No, pip, don't you see? This is a pirate hole!

I though pirates lived on the high seas.

I'm talking land pirates.

This whole area was probably lousy with 'em

Wow, you really know your history.

Sweet god, pip! It's a treasure map!

Do you know what this means?

We're all gonna be rich!

I thought pirates lived on the high seas.

Land pirates, duh!

So when do we head out to get us some pirate booty?

Whoa, whoa. We can't all go.

Someone has to stay and guard the corn.

You're right. I can only bring one of you.

It'll have to be someone with the cunning of a shark,

The skills of a shark,

The expert, technical know-how of a shark...

Hey, I know pirate songs.

You're in.

Can I go, too? Yeah, sure.

Come on, let's go rig up our treasure mobile.

Let's do it! Yeah! Ow!

Hey, look how they slobber over this treasure.

Oui. Next, we use their greed to get them off the barnyard.

Once they're gone and at each other's throats,

We move in and the corn will be ours, eh?

Vive la corn!

Vive la quebec!

[Together] vive la canada!

[Laughter]

[Snoring]

Shh.

Quiet, quiet, quiet.

Huh? What's that?

Bessy, you hear something too?

Yeah, look over there.

Otis, pip, and pig?

What are they doing up this late?

I'll help 'em sleep. Wait, shh!

[Imitating otis] all of our friends think

That we are going to share the treasure with them.

He's talking about the treasure.

[Imitating pip] but they are wrong,

Otis the cow.

[Imitating pig] oui, I am pig speaking now.

Little do they suspect that we plan

To keep the treasure for ourselves

And move to the bahamas.

[Laughter]

[Gasps]

They bought it. But of course.

Our powers of mimicry are excellent.

Not to mention our cardboard puppets.

Viva la puppetry!

Shhh. Shhh, be quiet.

Sorry.

[Adventurous music]

♪

Ingenious human disguises? Check.

Digging tools? Check.

Personal gaming systems and headphones

To eliminate the need for awkward road trip small talk?

[Together] check.

Then, gentlemen, I believe we're good to go.

Uh, you might need this.

Right, the map.

Good with the thinking.

This is it, people.

By sundown tomorrow, we'll all be rich.

Let's move 'em out.

Good luck. See you, guys.

You were gonna forget the map?

No, no, I was--i was gonna remember it at some point.

Look out!

Aah!

Uh, ladies. Want to step aside?

I bet they came to kiss us good-bye.

Mmm... Aigh!

So you think you can just keep

The treasure for yourselves, huh?

What? Stop fooling around.

We need to get going.

We heard your whole plan.

You're gonna keep any treasure you find

And move to the bahamas.

What now? Keep the treasure?

Is that true?

We overheard 'em talking about it

Just last night.

What are you even talking about?

Stealing from your own friends.

For shame. You think you know a guy...

Guys, it's not true.

Abby, why would you and bessy try

To poison everyone's mind against us?

Unless you want the treasure for yourselves.

That's ridiculous.

If we got the treasure, we'd share it.

So would we.

Then prove it.

You stay here and let us get the treasure.

Why, so you can steal it? Fat chance.

Anyway, I have the only map.

[Camera phones snapping]

Milk me.

Oh, look! A jolly leprechaun!

What are you looking at?

Hey, he's not jolly at all.

They're going for the treasure.

Not if we get to it first.

Hop on.

But bessy, won't we need human disguises?

Good point.

Crash!

If anyone's getting that treasure, it's us.

Yeah! But which vehicle to take?

Treasure, ho!

There's no stopping us now.

Wait, guys. Wait up!

Who's gonna guard the corn?

Clearly, they place their sacred trust in me.

Well, I won't let you down!

Hey, let me down.

Let me down, I said.

Did you hear him, mes amis?

He wants to get down.

That can be arranged.

Whoa!

Splash!

[Laughter]

Gentlemen, the corn is ours.

Strap on the feed bag, eh?

You said a mouthful.

Not so fast.

Eh? What?

[Wheezing]

[Laughter]

Check out the vicious guard dog.

Oui, what are you going to do, old one?

Gum us to death?

[Laughter]

You want that corn, you'll have to go through me first.

That, too, can be arranged.

[Tractor engine starts]

[Gasps]

Previously on back at the barnyard,

Otis. Pip.

Pig. Otis, pip, and pig?

Abby. Bessy.

Pip. Otis.

Freddy. Peck. Duke.

Pig. Abby.

Frenchy. Otis.

Look, a jolly leprechaun!

Aaaah! Aaaah!

Yaaah! Aaaah!

Aaaah!

Splat!

And now, part two of treasure hunt.

Wait, what happened in part one?

Never mind that.

Pip, any sign of the competition?

No way. We left 'em on the dust.

Ha ha, boys.

We're on a gravy boat to treasure town.

Woo-hoo, we're on our way. Treasure town!

Hey, look.

A sports bloopers, garbage, and free cheese sample shack.

[Tires screeching]

All our favorite things in one place.

What are the odds?

Guys, we can't afford to waste a single second

If we want that treasure.

Still, sports bloopers...

I'm so there. Let's do it.

Hey, there's nothing here.

Keep looking.

There has to be sports bloopers, garbage and cheese

Around here somewhere.

Bye-bye, morons!

Our treasure mobile! Relax.

I don't think they'll be getting too far.

Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop!

[Tires hissing]

You can't win. I thought of everything.

I am the king. [Laughs]

[expl*si*n]

[Laughs]

That felt good.

Well, I quit. No way.

We still have feet and various other extremities.

Let's go get the treasure!

Oh, come on, bessy.

I think I know how we can get some transportation.

[Springy boinging]

[Combine whirling]

I'm warning you, doggy.

Sep away from the corn.

Eat dentures, punks!

[Metal clanging]

[expl*si*n]

[Laughs]

Dude, are we in hawaii yet?

[Laughs] hawaii's not a place.

Oh, right.

Hello, boys.

Going our way?

[Choking]

Thanks, fellas. Bye!

Dude, those girls talked to us!

And I totally got their number!

It's !

[Making singsong sounds]

Welcome, friend.

You will find a safe haven here in our termite utopia.

Yaaah!

It's the blob! Run away!

[Screaming]

My stupid clown dad was right!

Playing outside is awesome!

Awesome! Totally refreshing!

Two bicycles, coming up.

Ha ha, they think I'm their termite god.

Step on up folks, right this way.

All: huh?

Find the tiny human and win a prize.

Where'd he go? There he is, or there he is.

He went under a shell.

I wanna play. I wanna play!

Keep your money, kid. We only play for bicycles.

Got any bicycles?

You bet we do, stupid carnival shell game man.

I like you, kid. You got spunk.

Now keep your eye on the tiny man.

No one walks away a loser.

What a loser!

Come back here!

You used trickery!

We won, fair and square.

Your heart is the color of evil.

Bye!

That game was rigged.

Ugh!

Guh.

Huh?

A treasure map.

[Springy boinging]

I can't believe we overtook otis and abby for the lead.

For once, we're winner!

Coming through.

We're still in second place.

No shame in that.

Watch your backs.

Going for the bronze.

We're still in this thing.

Faster, followers.

The map says the treasure is this way!

Well, at least it's nice to be outdoors on such a lovely--

Stop talking.

Oh, ho! A ha ha ha!

[Laughter]

We are warning you, old one.

Let us at those corn bins!

Never!

Very well.

Boys, time to drop him in the well.

I don't think so.

Huh?

[Grunting and muttering]

You want some more?

Retreat!

[Chuckles]

Uh-oh.

[Cat yowling]

Oh, ho! Ha ha ha!

Who's up for hobo stew?

It's hobolicious.

I can't believe

Abby thinks I'd keep the treasure for myself.

After all she and I have been through together.

Bleagh! Ugh.

You put real hobo in this?

I'll never tell.

Something weird's going on, and I'm gonna find out what.

But how?

Otis, you realize you're talking to yourself, don't you?

So you're saying I should find abby and talk to her.

You're right! Thanks for your help, guys.

I will come back for you!

I don't know, bessy.

It just doesn't seem like otis

To steal the treasure and not share it with everyone.

Morons are strange, unpredictable creatures.

Can you pass me the detonator?

Maybe we heard him wrong.

Maybe... [Gasps]

Flashlight signals!

They must be from otis.

Meet me under the big...

Dolphin?

No.

Floppy hat! No.

Crawdaddy?

Wait. New word.

Panamanian underpants!

The big tree!

Meet me under the big tree!

Oh. Right. Be there in a sec.

Abby, this treasure business has gotten

Completely out of control.

I was thinking the same thing.

I feel awful

That you think I'd keep the treasure for myself.

And I hate that you could think that about me.

Well, there's only one way to settle this.

I've decided to drop out and let you get the treasure.

Oh, otis. You would really do that for me?

Of course I would.

Then I'm gonna drop out and let you get the treasure.

No, no, no. I insist.

No, I insist.

Fine. Then I'll find it and give it to you.

No, I'm gonna find it and give it to you.

No way. Yes way.

Not if I find it--

Well, then I'll just get a time machine,

And go back in time and give it to you.

Well, while you're wasting your time

Building a time machine, I'll be getting the treasure!

In your dreams. It's go time, dairy boy!

Aargh! Raagh!

Heh, that treasure's as good as ours,

Thanks to operation: eliminate the competition.

Let's go, guys.

We got to get that treasure, so we can give it to abby.

Give it to abby?

I must have missed something.

[Laughs]

All: aaaah!

Hurry up, bessy.

We got to get that treasure, so we give it to otis.

Did you hit your head on something?

Aaaah!

We'll never get that treasure, peck.

We don't even have a vehicle.

Oh, stay positive, freddy.

Miracles can happ--

Crash!

Woo-hoo! Woo--ow.

So long, losers!

Life has winners.

Life has losers.

Now what?

We'll never catch snotty boy on foot.

Sounds like you folks could use some transportation.

Honest earl?

That's right, it's honest earl.

Hey, folks.

You ever want to get from point "a" to point "b"

In an exotic fashion?

Well, honest earl's your man!

Honest earl.

Y'all come on down to honest earl's exotic transportation

And test drive the butane-powered angel wings.

Honest earl.

Or the dolphin-powered land chariot.

Honest earl.

We got something for everyone,

Like the honest earl jet-powered rocket walker

For the old folks. Thanks, honest earl.

You're welcome.

And if you ain't completely satisfied,

You get your money back, guaranteed.

Money-back guarantee only valid in rhode island

And some parts of northern montana,

Which may actually be canada.

So what y'all waiting for?

Get on down and get yourself a test drive today.

Chomp!

Honest earl.

Thanks, honest earl. Bye. I'll miss you.

Really?

Nice boys. 'Course, this hovercraft's faster.

You have been a valiant adversary, monsieur.

Before we dump you in the well,

Do you have any last requests?

Well, I would like a piece of hard candy.

Very well.

Give it to him.

Mmm.

[Smacking]

Just bite the candy already!

Bite it, you idiot!

Just bite it.

Make with the crunchy-crunchy!

: Hay bale delivery!

Huh?

Now, to find a goat with a saw.

Right here.

Oh, you scared me.

According to the map, the treasure's under a big "x".

Ah, very good.

So we're probably looking for a pair of crossed palm trees,

Or some kind of "x"-shaped rock formation,

Or we could try looking under that big "x" over there.

Yeah, that works too.

I'm taking her down.

Coming through, dum-dum.

Whoa! Hey!

It's abby and bessy.

That treasure's yours!

No way! That treasure's yours.

It's yours! Yours!

Yours! Aaagh!

Those other stupid treasure hunters got ahead of us.

Well, not for long.

All: aaaah!

[Together] aaaah!

Boom!

[Groaning]

Onward to victor--

All: aaaah!

[All gasp]

All: the treasure!

I got the shovel!

[Frantic muttering]

Hey, I see something.

What? That sewer line?

No, next to that.

What do you see?

What is it? What? What? What?

Hey, everybody! Everybody listen!

It's a note.

"In your faces, stupid american animals."

Signed, "the crows.

P.s. Vive la canada."

It's a clue!

It's not a clue.

Don't you get it? They scammed us.

Oh.

You mean, there never was any treasure?

It's for the best, guys.

We almost let the crows use greed and suspicion

To tear us apart.

No treasure's worth that.

You're right, otis.

He is right. It's better this way.

Group hug!

Don't touch me. I wanted to be rich.

Group hug except bessy!

Awww.

[Friendly murmuring]

Sweet corn! The corn!

No one's guarding the corn! Let's book!

Ah ah aah.

Not unless you want my slingshot

To sh**t you in your bingshot.

Do what he says, guys.

Let him have the treasure.

Treasure? Otis, there was no--

Yes, sir, the treasure's yours.

We have been outsmarted by your superior strategy.

Got that right.

He's a genius. He's our leader.

Well, we'd love to stay

And watch you get spectacularly wealthy, but good-bye.

Guys, I think we hit the jackpot.

Aha!

We've done it!

We're the winners!

We're the...

So stinking...

No, definitely not a winner. We're so stinking.

I don't want to be rich anymore.

Oh, no.

[Excited muttering]

Huh?

The corn's all there. Every last kernel.

I wonder why the crows didn't take it.

I think I know.

Say my name! Say my name!

No, seriously. Somebody say my name.

I can't remember it.

Everett, you saved the farm from the crows!

I did?

Well, if what you say is true,

There are probably other farms that need a saving.

Rocket-power walker, activate!

Crunch!

Ow! That's not good.

Next week, on back at the barnyard...

Thwap!

Eek! Whoa!

Aaaah! [expl*si*n]

Eek! D'oh!

Thwap! Crunch!

Oh! Huh!

Wait! Hyup!

Eek! Aaaah!

Bam! Bam! Bam!

Aaaah!

Thwap! Crunch!

Eek! Eek!

Aargh! Aargh!

Aaaah!

Eek!

Uh-oh.

Whoaargh!

Uh, what--what's gonna happen?

Eh, don't worry about it.