07x10 - Cyber-Butt

[bunniefuu]

[snickering]

[rock music]

♪ ♪

- And this, class, is the computer that will act

as Highland High School's gateway

to the information superhighway.

Now, I know that all of you will use this responsibly,

but the school board is worried that some of you

will be tempted to access adult services,

some of which do contain p*rn images.

- Whoa. - [chuckles]

- That's why the faculty will be taking strict measures

against anyone who abuses the computer,

mm-kay?

Any questions?

- Uh, so, uh, how do we get p*rn?

[chuckles]

- Very funny, Butt-Head.

Okay. If there aren't any questions,

we'll head back to class.

Mm-kay?

- Whoa, free p*rn.

- Yeah. [both snickering]

- Yeah. [chuckles]

How do we get it?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure you can install it.

But I'd like to see you download anything else

with only megs of RAM.

- Uh, uh-heh-heh, welcome to the future.

Here is your free p*rn.

- Yeah. Yeah.

[both snickering]

- Uh, hey, Stewart.

We need you to get us some of that free p*rn.

[chuckles]

- No way, guys.

You heard Mr. Van Driessen.

We'll get in big trouble.

- No, we won't. - Yeah.

p*rn is good for you.

Yeah, did you know that?

- Come on, guys.

- Uh, uh-heh-heh, get us some p*rn.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, let's check it out.

Come on. Butthole.

- Guys, can't we just hang out?

- Uh, no.

[chuckles]

Uh, didn't you, like, promise us,

uh, a really long time ago that you were gonna get us

some p*rn? - Yeah.

Yeah, you promised! [chuckles]

- Guys!

- Come on, Stewart, everybody does it.

- Yeah, it'll be fine. Yeah.

- Come on, Stewart. Get us some p*rn.

- Yeah, yeah. Come on, get us some p*rn.

Here we go.

[chanting] p*rn, p*rn, p*rn, p*rn.

- Please leave me alone.

- [chuckles]

p*rn, p*rn, p*rn.

- Come on, Stewart.

- But I--

[sighs]

Okay, okay.

- [snickering] - [snickering]

[computer beeping]

- Uh, uh-heh-heh, well, it's a start.

- Yeah, yeah, keep going.

We want to see naked chicks. [chuckles]

Buck-naked, yeah.

Hey, what about that one?

- Oh, no.

That one's illegal in this state.

- Come on, I want to see it! I want to see it!

Damn it! - Yeah.

Come on, Stewart. Do it.

[chuckles] - Yeah.

[chuckles]

- O--okay, guys.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[heavenly music] - Whoa!

- Whoa!

Aah! Ahh!

- Oh, my God! - Ooh!

Boing!

[chuckles]

- Come to Butt-Head.

- [chuckles] Yeah!

[chuckles]

[screaming]

- What in God's name is going on here?

[shakily] Oh, my Lord!

[thump]

- Uh, uh-heh-heh, I think you k*lled her, Stewart.

- Yeah.

[chuckling]

- Now, as you boys know,

we have strict rules about accessing

computer p*rn from the library.

So before I sentence you to an extremely harsh punishment,

I want to know how you little punks did it.

[stammering] Come on.

You idiots can save yourself a lot of trouble

if you'll just tell me who helped you log on.

- Uh, uh-huh, heh-heh-heh, I did that myself.

[chuckles]

But Stewart got us the p*rn.

- What?

- Yeah, heh, he's pretty good. Yeah.

- But--but--but I--

- That's it!

You're all getting detention for the rest of the year,

and you've lost all your computer privileges!

[stammering]

- [chuckles]

Stewart's in trouble.

- [chuckles] Yeah.

That's cool.

- Hey, Stewart.

Uh, after we get out of here,

can you help us get some more p*rn?

- Yeah, yeah.

This time, get us more butt sh*ts.

- Leave me alone.

You guys already got me in enough trouble.

- Uh, uh-heh-heh, so?

- Yeah, yeah, we need more p*rn!

Come on, Stewart! [chuckles]

- Shut the hell up!

- [whispering] Will you guys please leave me alone?

Here, you can play with my Game Boy.

- Uh--

[Game Boy chiming]

This sucks. [chuckles]

- No way, Butt-Head.

If you kind of, like, close your eyes

and make them blurry, that thing over there

kind of looks like a naked chick

with big boobs.

Check it out.

[warbling]

- Whoa!

Oh, yeah.

[mesmerized chuckling]

- Oh-ho-ho, yeah.

Mm!

[heavy metal music]

- Oh, yeah. [chuckling]

- ♪ I got the poison ♪

♪ I got the remedy ♪

- Whoa! They're cracking concrete.

- Um, heh, you said "cr*ck."

[both chuckling]

♪ ♪

Well, heh, I guess I'll just, um, heh--

I guess I'll just do this for a while.

[scatting]

[chuckles]

[scatting]

[chuckles]

Yeah, yeah. [scatting]

Whoa!

They're rolling around in a pool of feces!

- Oh, yeah. Cool.

- ♪ I got the poison ♪

♪ I got the poison ♪

♪ I got the poison ♪

- I think this video is, like, a tribute to turds.

[chuckles]

- Yeah, it's about time.

I've been meaning to do a tribute to my own turds.

[chuckles]

It's called "Poop: A Retrospective."

[both chuckle]

- You know who I'd like to see

roll around in a bunch of feces?

- Um, heh.

- Hootie & the Blowfish.

[chuckles] - Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that would be cool.

[chuckles] It'd be like, heh...

♪ With a little love ♪

Heh-heh, poop, heh-heh-- ♪ And a little tenderness ♪

plop, plop. [chuckles]

- Yeah. [chuckles]

- Slop, slop, slop.

- [chuckles] That would rule.

[both chuckle]

- Yeah, yeah.

And I think it would really go

with the music really well, too.

[both chuckle]

[rock music]

♪ ♪