01x01 - Pilot

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Carol & The End of The World". Aired: December 15, 2023.*
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An animated and existential comedy about the daily rituals that make up the gaps that make up a life.
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01x01 - Pilot

Post by bunniefuu »

[watch ticking]

[ticking continues]

[bombastic carnival music playing]

[cork pops]

[lively chattering]

[cackling]

[inaudible conversation]

[music continues playing faintly]

[music fades out]

- [ticking resumes]
- [heartbeat thumping]

[voices whispering]

- [bell chiming]
- [intercom buzzes]

[man on PA] Ladies and gentlemen,
this train is no longer in service.


[powering down]

[melancholy music playing]

You smell that?

[doors slide shut]

[steam hissing]

[woman gasps]

[woman breathing rapidly]

[gasps]

[coughing]

[gasps]

[panting]

[ominous string music builds]

[pensive pop instrumental playing]

[static crackling]

...hurtling towards Earth.
It's unclear, but we believe...


Does your dog know
it's the end of the world?


Find meaning.

Live the life you want
in the way you want.


[preacher] Repent!
Seek salvation. It's not too late.


{an8}[reporter 1] ...massive job walk-offs,
making work a thing of the past.


...you're gonna have to wait to cross off
Everest from your bucket list.


[reporter 2] The stock market bell
rang for the last time today.


[woman] Every second is precious now.
Every moment...


At the speed it's moving, 9C will have
the impact of a ten-million megaton...


{an8}Ernie Briggs achieved his lifelong dream
of swimming across the English...


I've never felt more free!

[man] Time is almost up!

{an8}With seven months and 13 days remaining,
what will you be doing?


[insects chirping]

[faint birdsong]

[crow squawking]

[sighs]

[sizzling]

[shower tap running]

[male DJ] That's right.
Seven months and now 12 days...


[phone line beeps]

Hi, Dr. Berookim.
This is, um, Carol Kohl.

I hope you're doing well.

Savoring life.

Um, I'm calling to maybe set up
an appointment for a cleaning.

My schedule's pretty much open.

Again, this is Carol Kohl.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Okay, bye.

[people chattering]

[upbeat dance music playing]

[melancholy music playing]

[car horns honking]

[fireworks whooshing, crackling]

[doorbell chimes]

Hi, sweetie.

Hey, Mom.

Bernard! Michael! Carol's here.

[VHS player whirring]

Mom! Dad! Carol!

I love you!

See you on the ground!

[in French] One!

Two!

Whooo!

Oh, my goodness.

[in French] "The only thing
we have to fear is fear itself!"


Franklin Roosevelt!

- [in English] What did she say?
- I didn't know she knew French.

[woman cheering and whooping on TV]

- That was really good, Mom.
- Thanks, sweetie.

It's been fun cooking
through all of Julia Child's.

This was one of the easier ones.
What was that one we tried?

- The bouillabaisse.
- Bouillabaisse was a disaster.

- We didn't clean the clams well enough.
- I'm sure it was great.

- Your mother had to burn our sheets.
- Cake?

You know,

you can talk to us about anything, right?

- I know.
- [sighs] Good.

And you're doing okay, right?

Yeah. I'm doing well.

Great. We just wanted to make sure.

Because the Sottos...

You... You remember the Sottos?

They have a dog?

Yeah, well, they said
they saw you outside an Applebee's.

Oh.

The abandoned one on Junction.

Near the mall.

They said you were
walking around, looking inside.

And then you...

They said you got inside
and sat in one of the booths.

[melancholy music playing]

Sweetie, you can tell us. It's all right.

We just want to know. Was that you?

No, of course not.

Look, we're not going to be upset.

We just don't want you to miss out.

[Carol] No, I'm doing stuff.

I'm fine.

I've been...

I've been...

learning to surf?

[excited gasp]

Oh, you're surfing?

Yeah, I've been surfing.

At the beach.

Honey, that's wonderful!

[sighs] That does my heart good.

Yeah. I love it.

Oh, sweetie.

That's so great.

Michael, do you want cake?

[insects chirping]

[bird singing]

[birdsong]

[choir singing hymnal]

It's such a gift.

[choir continues singing]

[moaning]

Bernard.

Pauline.

So, I think I'm gonna go.

- [seat belt clicks]
- [engine turns over]

[melancholy piano music playing]

[sighs]

[insects chirping]

[music fades]

[Bach's "Orchestral Suite No. 2"
playing over PA]

[register beeping]

Um...

Do you still carry
those chicken burrito bowls?

[beep]

[beep]

[beep]

[beep]

I think maybe you're out.

[beep]

[register chimes]

[chimes]

[register beeps]

Maybe I missed it.

[receipt printer whirring]

[car approaching]

[woman] Carol?

Oh, my God! I knew that was you!

Oh. Hey, Janette.

You are not going to believe
where I just came from.

The supermarket?

No, silly.

Lisa and I just got back from Tibet.

It was truly life-changing.

We went to Lhasa and did
a lot of the boring, touristy things

like see the Potala Palace
and the Jokhang Temple and Gelug.

It was hard at first
because we didn't speak the language,

and the villages were pretty rural,
so the food wasn't great.

But luckily we found a tour guide who had,
you know, an okay grasp of English

and we got him to cook for us.

[inhales sharply] Carol,
the Tibetan people are so welcoming.

They are incredible, Carol.

You just have to go.

Promise me you'll go, okay?

- Okay.
- We really have to catch up.

- Okay.
- I want to hear all about your adventures.

Yeah.

That would be great.

[in Tibetan] Please put...

your phone away.

[tires screeching]

[somber piano music playing]

[man] Dear Ms. Kohl,

I hope this letter finds you well.

I'm personally writing
to request that you stop sending checks


regarding your expired
credit card statement.


I thank you for your years of patronage,
but you no longer have any debt with us.


[beeping]

[man] The only debt you owe
is to yourself.


As the CEO of First National,
I sacrificed everything for money.


[sighs]

[typewriter clacking]

[man] The pursuit made me
so anxious about my future,


I couldn't see the present.

The most precious resource
we have is time.


Don't waste it on doubts and fears.

Live your life.
Grab hold of it and never let go.


Life is a strange, beautiful mystery.

And I pray that you find
the peace within you to enjoy it.


Yours in kindness, Michael Gorman,
ex-CEO, First National Bank.


[waves lapping]

- [pulsing dance music playing]
- [laughing]

- [people cheering]
- [indistinct chatter]

[man] Yeah!

[crowd cheering]

f*ck Keppler 9C!

[crowd roaring]

Who's ready to die tonight?

[cheering]

I can't hear you!

I said, who the f*ck
is ready to die tonight?

- [air horn blowing]
- [cheering]

[DJ] Yeah!

[man] Yeah, we're ready!

We about to get space f*cked!

- [cheering]
- [dance music intensifies]

Sorry!

[man] Watch it, lady!

I'm trying to leave.

I'm sorry.

[music continues faintly]

[insects chirping]

Um, excuse me.

You mind if I...?

Oh, no. Go ahead.

Thanks.

- It's crazy out there.
- I know.

- Did you see that grass area?
- Yeah.

It's just too many people, you know?

It's crazy. I had to get out.

I just get so overwhelmed.

Yeah. I'm glad to be out.

Yeah!

[can tab clicks]

Uh, you want a grapefruit La Croix?

Oh, sure.

Thanks.

[scoffs] Look at this guy.

[Carol] Peacock man.

Unbelievable.

[fireworks whooshing and f*ring]

[fireworks popping]

- Better?
- Yeah. Much better.

I can't remember the last time
I was on a swing.

- They used to scare me.
- Really?

Yeah. Everyone would
always want me to go higher,

but it never seemed worth it.

You never launched yourself off?

Never.

I didn't even like to be pushed.

I just found the seat comfortable.

- Garbage trucks.
- What?

- Um, garbage trucks used to get me.
- The smell?

No.

You know that sound the compactor makes
when it's crushing everything inside?

That used to scare me.

The sound?

I... I guess I used to imagine
someone getting trapped inside,

yelling out for help,
but no one would hear it.

They would just keep adding more
and more garbage, bag after bag,

compacting it until it was so compact

it became impossible to even scream.

Just these little squares
filled with screams.

Yeah.

I can see that.

[soft, romantic music playing]

[music fades]

[faint birdsong]

[sizzling]

Morning, Jelly Bean. You sleep okay?

What?

- Not too cold, I hope.
- [Carol] No.

It was comfortable.

[man] I made Denver omelets!

That's nice, but I think I'm gonna...

[boy] Move, please.

Oh, sorry.

f*cking Denver omelets again.

Yeah. This is really sweet.

Thank you, but I have to go.

Oh, that's too bad.

W-Well, do you want your omelet to go?
I can put it in something.

No, that's...

[melancholy music playing]

Oh.

- Okay.
- I'll call you.

Okay. Yeah.

- Talk to you soon.
- Okay.

Thank you.

- Yeah.
- [door shuts]

[firework whooshes, crackles]

Oh, my God.

[dramatic string music plays, fades]

[people whooping]

- [man 1] All right!
- [man 2] Yeah!

[horn honking]

Whoo! Get it, girl! Get it!

[honking]

- [upbeat dance music playing]
- [indistinct chatter]

[music fades]

[beeping]

[Bernard] Hey, sweetie.

Just thinking about you
and all the amazing things you're doing.


I'm so proud of you.

- [Pauline] Who is it?
- [Bernard] It's Carol!

- [Pauline] Tell her I say hello!
- [Bernard] Your mother says hello.

[Pauline] Is she coming over?

[Bernard] She wants to know
when you're coming over.


- It's her machine.
- [Pauline] What?

[Bernard] It's her machine!

Anyway, you're probably at the beach.

Give us a call back when you get this.
Talk to you soon.


[Pauline] Hold on. Let me talk to her.

- [Bernard] I hung up.
- [Pauline] What?

- [long beep]
- [male voice] End of messages.

[whirring]

[machine whirring]

[upbeat music playing]

There isn't a single person out there
who doesn't have it.


The hunger to do more, be more, live more.

We all have it.

[music fades]

[boy] What are you doing here?

[eerie music playing]

What?

What are you doing here?

I'm doing my laundry.

My clothes were dirty,
so I'm doing my laundry.

I'm cleaning my clothes.

But why are you here?

I don't know.

I... I don't...
have anything else to do, so I'm...

But why are you here?

Where are your parents?

This is for grown-ups. Get out of here.

[engine revving]

Yeah! Carpe diem, bitch!

Ride that d*ck!

[fireworks crackling]

[tires screeching]

- Carol?
- Eric?

- [car horn blaring]
- [Eric chuckles]

- This is so crazy.
- [horn honks]

Go around!

Sorry. Do you mind
putting on your hazards?

[panel clicks]

You don't know how happy I am to see you!

- We didn't exchange numbers and I thought...
- [horn blaring]

You know what?
What are you doing right now?

Just driving home.

Can I show you something?

Um...

I was gonna...

Trust me. You're gonna love it.

- Um...
- [horn honking]

[woman 1] Seize the day!

[woman 2] Do it!

[man] No regrets!

What do you say?

[hazard lights clicking]

[alarm blares, stops]

- So they've been shouting at you all day?
- A woman earlier told me to "get it."

- Get what?
- I don't even know.

It's impossible to drive like that.

- At least it's positive stuff.
- Yeah. I guess it could be worse.

Oh, so much worse.

I once got into it with a neighbor
over an air compressor

and he spray-painted "jackass"
on the front of my house.

Oh, my God.

It's funny now,
but at the time I was so mad,

I walked over
to his house with two buckets of paint.

- Oh, no.
- Yeah.

And I was gonna
write something really rude too.

But then I started thinking
about him and his little boy,

and his little boy
seeing what I wrote and,

well, uh,

I couldn't do it.

So I just wrote, "I forgive you" instead.

- What? [chuckles]
- Yeah.

I took a paint roller
and just scrawled "I forgive you"

- in big paint letters across his garage.
- [chuckles, sighs]

I guess he didn't appreciate the sentiment
because then he slashed my tires.

- [chuckles]
- After that, the police got involved

and I was in and out of court for months...

[both chuckling]

[both laughing]

Oh.

This is really great, by the way.

[Eric] Usually it comes with a sauce,

but, uh, I don't know
how to do that stuff, so I just cooked it.

Honestly, it's really nice.

I'm glad I came out.

I needed this.

[soft, romantic music playing]

[Eric sighs]

Just a little further.

[Carol] It's so peaceful.

[sniffles] This is my favorite spot
in the whole city.

[wind blowing softly]

- I love you, Carol.
- Oh.

It's sudden, I know, but I've never
been so sure of anything in all my life.

I, uh...

- I'm sorry.
- You don't understand.

After my wife left, I thought,

"That was it. I'm done.
I'll never find anyone again."

But here you are.

Like a miracle from God, and...

[hesitates] I don't know
how else to explain it,

but it's... it's like
a light switched on, Carol.

I feel alive again!

Look, um, I think you're really nice,
and I had a great time, but...

I'm nothing without you.
We're meant for each other.

I know you see that!

I need you and you need me.
You have to see that!

I'm sorry. I have to go.

Please don't go! I love you!

Thank you for dinner.

[tense string music playing]

Look. Okay.

Maybe you'll never love me.
But that shouldn't hold us back.

And honestly, it'd be foolish
to think you'll love me the same way.

I don't expect that.

But right now, Carol, right now,
I have enough love for the both of us.

[Carol] Oh, God.

I can't die alone, Carol! I can't do it!

And it's k*lling me.
And it's k*lling my son, Steven.

You remember Steven.
He needs a mother, Carol.

Someone like you. Don't you see that?

Those feminine qualities of yours
would go a long way to helping Steven.

This was a mistake. I'm sorry.

Can we at least talk about it?!

Carol! Carol, please, come back!

Carol!

[brakes squealing]

[doorbell chimes]

- Carol?
- Hi, Mom.

I didn't know you were coming.

Yeah, um...

I was in the neighborhood
and thought I'd say hi.

How lovely.

Well, this is actually perfect.
We were just about to call you.

What's with all the luggage?

That's what we wanted
to talk to you about.

- Bernard! Do you have that brochure?
- [Bernard] What?

The brochure!

[Bernard] Check the coffee table!

- Are you guys going somewhere?
- It's not here!

We're taking a cruise!

Oh, wow.

We didn't want to make a decision
until we were 100% sure you were okay.

But now that we know
you found your way, we figured, why not?

Wow. This is...

Isn't it wonderful? It goes everywhere.

Havana, Costa Rica,

Hong Kong, Bangkok,

Bora Bora, New Zealand.

Your father, Michael,
and I are gonna see the world!

This is... really great, Mom.

It's going to be so much fun.

There she is.

Sweetie, before we go, we wanted
to get you something for your journey.

You really shouldn't have.

Open it.

It's a surfboard.

Now, when you're surfing,
it'll be like we're there with you.

It's even got your name.

We're going to miss you so much.

Sorry.

It's the right size. Right?

No, yeah. It... It's perfect.

Oh, sweetie. You're doing it, sweetheart.

You're living.

We love you, sweetheart.

[surfboard thudding]

[waves crashing]

[seagulls squawking]

[Carol screams]

[in French] You have to pull the cord!

[in English] What?

[in French] Pull the cord!

[in English] I don't speak French!

[restaurant patrons chattering]

[in French] Everything looks so good.

I know what I'm getting.

What about you, Jelly Bean?

[chattering stops]

[in English] My menu's blank.

- [bird tweeting]
- [trash compactor whirring]

[rapping on glass]

My menu's blank.

[rapping on glass]

My menu's blank!

[screaming]

[booming]

[rapping on glass]

[screaming]

Ma'am, you can't sleep here.

We've gotten complaints about loiterers.
You need to move your car.

Sorry, I...

Let me just...

[engine whines]

Looks like your battery is dead.

- Um...
- You need to go now, ma'am.

[firework whooshes, crackles]

[train whizzing by loudly]

[heavenly choral music playing]

[twinkling]

[choir swells, fades]

[dramatic piano music playing]

[bell chimes]

[dramatic music swells]

[heavenly choral music swells]

[music fades]

[jazzy elevator music playing]

[elevator bell chimes]

[elevator bell chimes]

[elevator bell chimes]

[bell chimes repeatedly]

[elevator bell chimes]

[music fades]

[heavenly choral music resumes]

- [keyboards clacking]
- [printer whirring]

Holy sh*t.

- ["Wheel" by Katie Von Schleicher playing]
- ♪ If you tell me it's a wheel ♪

♪ Could we turn it around? ♪

♪ If I tell you it's a wheel ♪

♪ What you wear like a crown? ♪

[vocalizing]
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