[wind blowing]
[wind blowing]
[water flowing]
Wayward boy
Won't you cut my lead?
I got no dreams
To carry me
Oh, sh*t. Oh, sh*t.
Oh, sh*t.
Oh, sh*t! Oh, sh*t!
Oh, I'm sorry.
The door was unlocked
and I had to pee--
What the f*ck?
Can't you read?
I mean, I'm sorry. I--
Your wrist!
[groaning]
Hey!
Where-- where you going?
I didn't mean to hurt you.
Burn my dreams
On a wayward sea
Let them drown
Oh, mercy me
Ashen ghosts
On a pine bluff tree
Hanging still
Oh, sorrow be
Oh, mercy me
Let down my dreams
On a rope of light
In a raw smoke heap
Oh, mercy me
Let down my dreams
On the twilight's vine
In the river deep
[music continues]
My name's John.
What's yours?
I said, what's yours?
Where you from?
You got to be from somewhere.
I used to tell people
I was from France.
Sounded like a good place
to be from.
All those songs, you know?
[singing in French]
The problem was
folks would start
speaking to me in French,
and I couldn't pick up anything
that they were saying
so I had to stop telling people
I was from France.
Hey, do you know that song,
the one they sing in France?
[distant dog barking]
[John]
Where we headed?
Can't you hear me?
Leave me alone!
[groans]
[groans]
[gasping]
Aah! Damn claw in my belly.
When was the last time
you ate?
[moans]
[groaning]
[moaning]
Breathe.
John.
Just breathe.
[breathing deeply]
Slowly.
So it fills you up.
Like this.
[breathing slowly]
[John breathes deep]
[groaning]
I'm full, though.
[groaning]
What, beans and rice full?
Steak and hash.
[coughing]
What's wrong with you?
Oh. Oh.
Dust in the lungs.
[coughs]
You take anything for it?
I ain't going back
to that hospital.
I ain't taking you
to the hospital.
[breathing deeply]
You should try it
through your nose.
Take the pressure
off your lungs.
Like this.
[inhales deeply]
[inhales through nose]
Ah, that's harder.
[groans]
Gave Myrt another year.
Ah, oh. Who's Myrt?
[distant dog barking]
-Black bread and cheese.
-Hm.
Ha! Told you!
[inhales]
Red wine from a glass.
-Lemonade. With real lemons.
-[chuckling]
[John coughs]
[exhales]
And cake.
[woman]
With a slap of guava jam.
[John]
Oh, what's that?
[woman]
The Mexicans eat it.
[soft music]
Eyes are bigger
than my stomach.
[retching]
Cops'll b*at you dry
for that sh*t.
Get up.
-Okay.
-Get up.
Okay. [groaning]
[rustling]
[soft music]
Hey, what do you got
against cops?
My brother was a cop.
Uh, stepbrother.
Is that so?
His name was Steve.
Steve no more liked
picking folks up
than folks liked being picked.
Do you ever stop talking?
[exhales] Oh.
Except if it was someone
who'd done a m*rder.
Oh, Steve liked taking
the murderers down.
Lord's mercy, he said.
Where is he now?
I don't know.
Think you'll run into him?
-No.
-Good.
You just think
he was some dumb cop.
See, for him,
only law was God's law.
So not all cops are bad cops.
You a Bible man?
I just grew up around it.
Well, don't you like the Bible?
I like the Bible fine.
Just don't like
men preaching it.
Well, I just know
what Steve taught me,
and he was a good man.
You ever seen him work?
I saw him b*at a man once.
And was the man
a m*rder*r?
[John] Thief.
Same as.
That's what Steve said.
"The thieves are the buzzards
of the earth.
You got to b*at
the thieving out of them,
or they will overrun the land
and leave us good folks
with nothing but hellfire
to walk through."
I don't know
if I'd put it like that,
but I know when Steve
finished with him...
all I could see
was the man's eyelids
shaking like God Almighty.
But Steve was good...
and kind.
He dragged the man
off the broken road
and carried him in his arms
all the way to the station.
A pure act of kindness it was.
After the man got b*at.
-He was a thief.
-So are you.
I'm not a thief.
I bet you wouldn't
mind it one bit
if Steve b*at you dry.
The Lord's mercy.
That right?
I'm not a thief.
But if you were.
If I was
and he caught me...
well, he'd have the law
on his side.
And here.
Lord's mercy, right?
Well, you shouldn't
have stole.
[whimpers]
I'm not a cop!
I'm not a g*dd*mn cop!
I'm sorry! I'm--I'm sorry!
I'm sor--
I'm sorry.
[wings flapping]
[footsteps]
Stop following me!
Why?! So you can
cut yourself
with that piece of glass
in your hand?
[glass clanks]
I'm not having sex
with you.
[distant train honking]
I'm not having sex
with you, either.
[train rumbling]
I could tell you a story.
That might help you
fall asleep, you know?
Steve would read me to sleep.
Please stop talking.
"Go sleep," he'd say.
Just like that.
"Go sleep."
No "to."
Just "Go sleep."
[train rumbling]
Hey. You know any movies?
I bet if you told me a movie,
I could fall asleep.
-[groggily] What?
-A movie.
It doesn't have to be
an old one.
It could... be one that
they showed at the drive-in.
What are you
talking about?
You ever been
to the drive-in?
No. Jesus.
Go back to sleep.
I haven't been asleep.
How can I fall back asleep
if I haven't been?
Oh, my God.
I can't believe
you never been to a drive-in!
Drive-ins are amazing.
The whole movie is yours.
It's not just--
it's not just way up there
on the screen, it's--
it's in the grass,
it's in the cars,
it's in the weeds.
Imagine driving down
the highway
and you catch
Elizabeth Taylor's face
right off the side of the road.
Elizabeth Taylor's face!
You're creeping me out.
It's great,
'cause it's a part of you.
What?
I don't like the idea of
20-foot people walking around.
[train rattling]
[dramatic music]
[train chugging]
["Deck the Halls"
by Nathan Hamilton playing]
'Tis the season to be jolly
Fa la la la la,
La la la la
Don we now our gay apparel
Fa la la la la,
La la la la
Troll the ancient
Yuletide carol
Fa la la la la,
La la la la
[heart pounding]
It's Mary.
What?
My name. Mary.
Can I touch
your back, Mary?
[train rattling]
[soft music]
Go sleep, John.
Go sleep.
[belt clanks]
Go sleep, John.
Go sleep.
[gasps]
Mary, why'd you let me...
Mary?
Mary?
Mary!
Mary?!
Mary?!
[panicked breathing]
-Mary!
-[Mary] It's okay!
I'm here.
Where'd you go?
-I was hungry.
-What was I supposed to do?
What was I supposed to do
if you didn't come back?
I'm right here, John.
I'm right here.
[both chewing]
[train rattling]
[grunts]
[strains]
Ah!
[man] Sorry, man.
All full.
Good morning.
You all right, Mom?
[squeals]
[Mary]
That's your mother?
Her name's Providence.
Say hi to
our new friends, Ma.
[squeals]
Can she talk?
Right.
Makes for a good act.
She can get folks bawling
and sh**ting dimes
quicker than
any carny I ever seen.
Isn't that right, Ma?
[squeals]
But for the last
50 miles, nothing.
Not one nickel.
Under the spell of
a laughing god, I tell ya.
[squeals]
Name's Israfel.
John.
Israfel.
Oh, hey.
Could you spare some?
She's damn hungry.
[squealing]
The f*ck?
-We'll get by.
-[Israfel] Thanks.
-You're a good man.
-f*ck that.
That bit'll
last her for days.
Days and days and days.
Isn't that right, Ma?
[squeals]
[train horn blaring]
[crickets chirping]
-[Israfel groans]
-Why are we stopped, Mary?
Dead w*tback.
Remember the last time
this happened, Ma?
[squeals]
Damn train
stopped for hours.
Cops around, investigating.
And all
the passengers outside,
trying to figure out
what's going on.
So Providence and I walk up
to the dining car.
Surprise, surprise.
Everybody's plates,
just where they left 'em.
So we sit down
at one of them fancy tables,
tuck those linen napkins
into our collars,
and have ourselves the finest
rib-eye you can imagine.
[squeals]
And corned beef hash.
That's right.
[metal clangs]
[John coughs]
[Mary whispering]
No noise now, you hear?
[suspenseful music]
[train chugging]
[John]
Red rose on a bush.
Hawk circling in the sky.
Hey, are you John Akin?
Huh?
Is your last name Akin?
No.
No?
Funny, you put me
in mind of him.
I don't know him.
Three black crows eating grass.
-Patch of Indian paintbrush--
-Hey, John...
I ran into him once in Arkansas.
Who?
John Akin.
In a speck on the map
called Helena.
You heard of it?
John Akin was hiding out there.
Cops were after him.
Quiet little town, no one
would think to look there.
But John, he couldn't
stand the silence.
Made him all jittery-like.
He got more and more agitated
as the days went by.
Finally, one day
he couldn't help himself.
He had to slit
some fool's throat.
[laughs]
[chuckles]
Didn't like the way
the man looked at him.
Is what he said.
But John had a funny way
with the truth sometimes.
[singing]
When John Akin fought
He fought like a hound
Would leave a man
Drowning in blood
Without so much
As a turn-around
Well, I don't fight.
Yeah.
Well, you sure do put me
in mind of John Akin.
Kept his eyes bowed down,
just like you.
"Looking for pennies?"
folks would call out.
"Looking for knives,"
he'd say.
[chuckling]
John Akin.
I ain't John Akin.
[chuckling]
[train horn blaring]
[cards shuffling]
Wooden posts holding up
a barbed wire fence.
Hey, what happened
to your wrist?
What?
He asked what happened
to your--
Nothing.
[chuckling]
[squeals]
Good one, Ma.
[flies buzzing]
[train rumbling past]
What'd you say
they called you again?
I didn't.
Touchy.
That's what
they oughta call you.
Am I right?
[squeals]
Yeah, troubled.
They call me Troubled.
They call you Trouble?
Troubled.
Why would anyone
call you that?
f*ck if I know.
You think I like having people
call me something for no reason.
Ain't nothing wrong with me.
Everybody else
in the world that's f*cked.
Amen.
It's your turn,
by the way.
Oh, nice move.
Touchy.
[train honks]
[Israfel]
What do you think, Ma?
Is Henri going to
like this guy or what?
[intense music]
[howling]
It's a biblical name,
I believe.
I don't recall such a name.
Oh, you read the Bible now?
My stepbrother
would read it to me.
-He a preacher?
-Cop. His name's Steve.
You may have heard of him.
Steve?
No, I can't say that I have.
But then I don't make
much time to talk to cops.
Make your skin itch?
Just like yours, Touchy.
Well, Israfel
ain't a Bible name.
Well, it was.
Providence done give it to me.
Ask her where it came from.
[squeals]
Might take a long time.
[laughing]
Who's Henri?
Last night you said
Henri would like me.
I don't know
what you're talking about.
Do you, Ma?
[squeals]
[tense music]
[train horn blaring]
[Mary] You can really
wrap your tongue
around a name like that.
Israfel.
[laughs]
Bitch.
What did you just say?
Damn whore.
[grunts]
Ah!
C'mon, Bible boy!
Say it again!
[Providence squeals]
Please. Give me a chance
to break your f*cking head.
I once called Steve
about a thousand things.
"Gutfuck." I didn't know
what I was saying.
It was just a thought
in my head.
[coughing]
Here.
It's the coldest thing I got.
[John coughing]
[whimpering]
-Ain't swollen a bit.
-Don't touch me.
[sniffles]
[train horn blaring]
[lighter clicks]
[humming]
Hey, those are mine.
Give them back!
They fell out of your bag
while you were sleeping.
Give them back.
You been to these places?
Give them back. Please.
Give them back.
[postcards fall]
His lighter, too.
[laughing]
Mary's taking me there.
Wait. What?
Yeah.
Good luck with that.
A place where
all the bits of the world
come together all at once.
Arabian horses
next to German cars.
Italian ships resting
on the hills of Montana.
The sound of French phonographs.
While a Hollywood screen...
20 feet tall...
moves back and forth
through the gravity field
of the frontier.
And the biggest stars
burst through the screen
with their painted
ivory teeth...
and irradiate the frontier
with a ferocious kiss.
At the drive-in?
And on that
technicolor screen...
a field of poppies leads you
back to a childhood
you wish were yours...
but is only the stuff of--
of books from another century.
This a real place, John?
[soft music]
In this place, a child--
a child who takes
pictures of a solar eclipse,
looking straight at the sun,
and nothing happens to him.
Nothing.
His eyes just grow large
and the small of his camera
unspools plates of hieroglyphs.
Part Egyptian, part Indian,
part...
no one knows.
The child can't hear like it
sometimes happens in dreams.
[camera clicks]
[intense music]
[thuds]
The child lets the camera
fall from his hands.
He glides his hands over
the plates of hieroglyphs.
"I was born in Missouri,"
he says.
"I was born in New York.
I was..."
The half-formed hieroglyphs
burn themselves onto his skin
and he's left with a mark.
So he will always be known
as the child marked by the sun.
By its very eclipse.
Who is from a place
made up of other places.
Who...
walks around with Hollywood
silver in his veins and--
and the eye of a broken-down
Brownie camera in his heart.
A place where
all the bits of the world
all come together at once, huh?
What are you hiding
under that beard?
What?
John Akin b*rned
his boy on the chin,
so the story goes.
I don't know what
you're talking about.
And then he took
a picture of his bastard son
with an old camera...
and smashed him
over the head with it.
Boy wandered the earth,
his head messed up,
pa's meanness in him.
Who was your mother, son?
-He don't know.
-Whore's son.
Mother d*ed in an opium haze,
Chinese poppies
dancing in her brain.
-Israfel.
-[Israfel] So...
John Akin found himself
a dead whore
and a bastard son who inherited
his mother's madness.
What's John Akin to do
but kick the boy
out into the world?
You're operating
with a blown mind, son.
Phantom fathers
and g*dd*mn hieroglyphs.
-f*cking plague sh*t!
-[John groans]
[Mary grunting]
Just a think.
We could've had something.
She's not worth it,
is she, Ma?
[squeals]
[John coughing]
Get the f*ck away from me.
[coughing]
[train rattling]
Burn my dreams
On a wayward sea
Let them drown
Oh, sorrow be
Open arms
On a pale bark tree
Wings of blood
Oh, sorrow be
[train rattling]
[heart pounding]
[John coughing]
Go... sleep.
[John coughing]
Go!
Sleep!
-[glass shatters]
-[gasps]
[groaning]
Mary?
Where's Mary?
Mary!
Mary!
Mary!
Mary, where are you?
[Providence squeals]
[squealing]
[squealing]
[squealing]
f*ck you, bitch.
Mary!
Mary.
Mary.
Mary.
Mary.
Where'd she go?
[panting]
Mary.
[breathing heavily]
Have you seen Mary?
Mary?
My friend. Mary.
No, mon ami.
You are the first
I've seen today, I'm afraid.
Smells good.
It is good.
You've got a good nose.
[cutlery clinking]
You're hungry, aren't you?
We've been walking.
From Ohio.
The smell.
It could only be Ohio.
I tell you what.
You got that good nose.
Give me a sniff.
Tell me where I'm from.
I'll give you a dollar.
A whole dollar.
You are hungry, aren't you?
Go on. Sniff.
[sniffs]
New Hampshire.
Canada.
sh*t.
Sometimes you win.
Sometimes, well...
Henri.
Henri Gatien.
-Henri?
-Gatien.
John.
John Akin?
No.
We'd better get going.
How old is she?
How old are you?
Are you mute?
Is she mute?
She makes a sound
sometimes.
Look at those legs.
So strong.
Show me some of your leg.
Canada, eh?
Between Nictaux and Paradise.
Acadie.
That like French and that?
Tout va bien, mon ami.
I used to tell people
I was from France.
-Not France.
-All those songs, you know.
-Canada.
-And wine.
Hey. You--
you know that song?
What song?
That song. That song.
The one they sing in French.
Mon ami...
[humming]
-Ah.
-Non...
[mandolin chords play]
[singing in French]
You know it!
[hums]
Piaf.
"The Little Sparrow."
Oh, you're lucky
you're French.
Ah, I'll give you
the dollar.
-But I didn't--
-It's yours.
What do you do?
I am a courier des bois .
I trade things.
You want the dollar or not?
Not everyone would
think of New Hampshire.
[soft music]
You want to hear
a-- a sermon?
I don't like Scripture.
How old did you say she was?
I don't like Scripture
either.
-Makes my head...
-Does it now?
Buzzing in my head.
Makes me...
That's right.
Look at me.
Look at me,
ma petite cheri.
[John] I like
the Commandments, though.
The sound of "Thou shalt..."
What great teeth.
Wouldn't you agree?
[laughs]
Do you two know
each other?
Have we met before?
What happened here?
Oh, nothing.
Damn claw in your belly,
right?
[coughing]
Who says that?
"Damn claw in my belly."
You're a funny man,
John Akin.
I ain't John Akin.
You got
some muscle there, no?
My stepbrother Steve
is stronger than me by a mile.
Have you ever heard of him?
He's a cop.
I cannot say I have,
mon ami.
He used to read me
the Commandments.
Did I say that already?
It's getting hard
to follow them all.
I think God has abandoned us.
I think that more and more.
[Providence squeals]
What was that?
[squeals]
C'est un miracle!
It's just a sound.
[squeals]
Incroyable!
That's what I thought!
This is a fine man,
a man of means--
I will give you
$100 to strike her
with my belt
with her doing that sound.
One hundred. Right now.
[John groans]
Two hundred.
She'll do it, John.
-Isn't that right,
ma mome piaf?
-[squeals]
How many meals
would that buy?
What's it going to be?
What's it going to be?
[screams]
[Providence squeals]
[screaming]
[man's voice]
Help me go sleep, John.
What?
[squeals]
Ask the good Lord
and ye shall receive.
You'll never find your friend.
But God has not abandoned you.
Now do as she asks.
Tout suite. Now!
[intense music]
[squeals]
The other end, mon ami.
You know how this goes.
[intense music continues]
[screeching]
[Henri] That's right,
ma petite cheri.
With that noise.
[screeching continues]
And pray, John. Pray.
Our Father
who art in Heaven,
hallowed be Thy name.
Very nice.
[camera flashes]
[crying, screaming]
[coughing]
[train rumbling]
[train horn blaring]
[gasps] John?
[train horn blaring]
[soft music]
[thuds]
[soft music continues]
[faint lively chattering]
[train rattling]
[soft music continues]
[coughs]
[groans]
Mary?
I was looking for you.
I-- I...
I couldn't find you.
I didn't know where else to go.
I knew you'd be here, John.
Go sleep, bitch!
Go sleep!
Give me.
Whatever you got, hm?
I got all day, girl.
f*cking gypping me
all the time.
No one's gypping you, John.
What do you want for it?
What?
Your coat.
Nothing.
Everybody wants something.
[camera flashes]
[high-pitched music playing]
[leaves rustling]
[coughing]
[coughing]
Like wine. In a glass.
Lemon lemonade?
Mm-hm.
Just a sip.
[exhales]
[chuckles]
I knew you weren't dead.
Lost maybe, but...
-but not dead.
-[Mary chuckles]
[mellow music]
[John humming]
[panting]
[laughs]
[upbeat music]
Oh, I gotta do something.
I gotta do something, Mary.
Where'd they get
all this stuff?
-What are you doing?
-Shhh!
[upbeat music continues]
What happened
to the Commandments, John?
[camera flashes]
[John whooping]
[laughing]
Best week ever!
Ah!
[laughs] Mwah!
[moaning]
[mumbling indistinctly]
You want some?
Hm?
Whoo!
Look at this stuff.
I mean, I need this stuff.
You're gonna choke
on that stuff.
Ooh.
[toy hands clapping]
Oh.
[groaning]
Some things aren't right.
You spend your whole life
thinking they are,
but they're not.
When I jumped from the train,
time stopped.
Everything was over. Finally.
Once and for all. Over.
You have no idea
what a relief that was.
Except it wasn't... over.
And I wondered...
how is it possible
that I jumped
from a speeding train
and didn't even get a scratch?
And this-- this...
feeling...
overwhelmed me.
I can't describe it, John.
I didn't understand it.
I still don't understand it.
But all the anger I felt
towards the world?
Gone.
And in its place...
was grace, John.
Pure grace.
I never felt that before.
[scoffs]
Blah, blah, blah, blah.
You want to help me, Mary?
You get me more of this!
Hit me, Mary.
That's what you're good at!
I...
[groans]
[upbeat music playing]
Stop it, Mary!
[grunting]
[Mary laughing]
[John panting]
[Mary laughing]
[both laughing]
Mary...
[body thuds]
[coughing]
[wind howling]
[coughing]
[coughing]
You okay?
I'm going to try
to find a way to get in.
Don't close those eyes, John.
I'll be right back.
Right back.
[chains clank]
[Israfel]
Well, John Akin fought
He fought like a hound
Would leave a man
Drowning in blood
Without so much
As a turn-around
[laughs]
You're a hard man
to track down.
Where you headed, John?
You never did find that place
you were talking about, did you?
What a surprise.
Hey, you still got
those postcards?
Lost 'em a long time ago.
Well, that is a shame.
[squeals]
Hey, you look good, Mary.
How'd you find us?
Is that a new dress?
John.
[Israfel]
He's confiding in me, Mary.
It's a sign of friendship.
-Leave him alone.
-Hey, John.
You got any of
the good stuff left?
It's in my veins.
Lasts for days.
Days and days
and days and days.
Hey, you think...
you think my mother
would want something?
-Cut it out!
-f*ck you, Touchy!
[Mary grunts, thuds]
Now, what was I saying?
Oh, yeah.
The craziest thing.
This man comes up to me
selling pictures.
And he says, "I got
something to trade you."
And he was true to his word,
like he knew that he was
gonna run into me.
"This one oughta do you,"
he says.
[squeals]
You said
you didn't know him.
She's shouting, see?
[squeals]
Somebody really belted her.
You wouldn't know anything
about that, John?
Would you?
[squeals]
[grunts]
Aahhh!
[choking]
-[Israfel choking]
-[John straining]
Not one more word, Steve.
[groaning]
[panting]
["The Ballad of the Strung Up
Man" by Robbie Tan]
Bring down the hours
Bring down the days
The tied-up man
Wants to cover his head
A bloodless rain
Will fall on the grave
Of the man strung up
For no reason
Bring down the hours
Bring down the days
The tied-up man
Wants to lift his arms
A needle bent
In the hollow brain
Of a man strung up
For no reason
What evil
Have I done, Lord?
What evil have I done?
A voice called out
In the cold, cold dawn
Of a life gone by
For no reason
Of a life gone by
For no reason
Of a life gone by
For no reason
What evil have I done?
[John crying]
[coughing]
[breathing heavily]
[emotional music]
[John breathing shakily]
Oh, my God.
Thanks.
Tastes good.
[foil rustling]
Is that a guava cake?
It's good, isn't it, John?
What are you showing?
Ain't shown nothing in years.
Turning the place into
an amusement park, actually.
Like Six Flags?
More like Epcot.
Over there's
going to be Italy.
Mount Everest
where the screen is.
And right here,
Arabian Nights.
Supposed to tell
a different story
every time you come to visit.
What are they
gonna do with that screen?
You know, it looks
a lot bigger up close.
You can walk up there
and have a look.
I won't tell nobody.
[soft music]
[laughing]
What?
[projector running]
[peaceful music]
[birds chirping]
["Non, je ne regrette rien"
by April Matthis]
[singing in French]
[singing continues]
["Mercy (Oh Sorrow Be)"
by Caridad Svich]
Burn my dreams
On a wayward sea
Let them drown
Oh, mercy me
Ashen ghosts
On a pine bluff tree
Hanging still
Oh, sorrow be
Oh, mercy me
Let down my dreams
On a rope of light
In a raw smoke heap
Oh, mercy me
Let down my dreams
On the twilight's vine
In the river deep
[music continues]
Wayward boy
Won't you cut my need?
I got no dreams
To carry me
["Walking the Weeping Jesus
(Straight to Hell)"
by Little Mazarn]
When I die,
I want you to bury me
Save the burnin'
For eternity
When I die,
I want you to bury me
Save the burnin'
For eternity
Straight to hell
We go, boys
Straight to hell we go
By the light of the moon
We're drowned below
Straight to hell we go
Weeping Jesus
Save my soul and me
A bucket of gold
Show me how the glory run
Lies beneath
The rocks and snow
Straight to hell
We go, boys
Straight to hell we go
By the light of the moon
We're drowned below
Straight to hell we go
[music fades out]
Fugitive Dreams (2020)
Moderator: Maskath3