01x03 - A Friend

[bunniefuu]

[RUDEUS] That little girl gave me something truly priceless.

I can go out. I'm done being a shut-in.

[RUDEUS] I won't let that go to waste.

[RUDEUS] This is the first day of the rest of my life.

[RUDEUS] Okay!

[PAUL] Ohh...

Hey! Not while--

[RUDEUS] Mother! Father!

[PAUL clears throat]

May I go and play outside for a while?

[PAUL] Outside? Well, sure. Of course you can.

Oh, darling! Rudy is going out on his own!

And I used to worry he was sickly.

But time really does fly, huh?

Indeed.

Did you think something was wrong with me?

You never cried about anything.

[RUDEUS] That bothered you?

But I've grown up to be so strong and charming!

Yeah, and it's always been the ways

you don't act like a kid that worry me the most.

[RUDEUS] Am I not turning out to be

the firstborn son you wanted?

I mean, I'm not complaining.

[RUDEUS] Then what?

I'm only trying to become a more worthy heir

to the Greyrat legacy.

Ha! Well, if that's what you want, then get out there

and bring home a girlfriend or two.

I understand. I won't rest

until I find a woman who's a match for dear Mother.

Aww!

Ha! Oh, and don't forget to be kind, son.

A man should never use his strength

to push people around.

Yeah, I know that much, at least!

And if you've taught me anything,

a man should use his strength to show off to girls.

Right. Uh! No, that's not right.

[laughs] I'm just kidding.

We should use it to protect the weak, shouldn't we?

Well. Yeah. You got it that time.

Okay then, I'm off!

Be careful, sweetie!

He's such a wonderful boy.

I only hope I'm a good enough father to him.

Good morning!

Hey, how's it going?

[RUDEUS] Look at this. I'm out on my own!

I may not get to thank Roxy,

but I'll always treasure her holy relic.

[SOMAL] We don't want your kind here!

[CHILD A] Go back to the Demon Continent!

[CHILD B] And stay there!

[SOMAL] Yeah! Get lost, demon!

[CHILD B] Take this!

[RUDEUS] Well, this feels familiar.

Knock it off!

[KIDS gasp]

What was that?

Ganging up to bully a helpless kid?

Guys like you are the worst!

[CHILD B] We're over here, idiot!

[CHILD A] You're the knight's kid. Butt out!

[RUDEUS chuckles] Give it your best sh*t, I'm not scared!

Where'd he get that water from?

[RUDEUS chuckles]

This is lame. Let's go.

Are you okay?

Wow.

[RUDEUS] Holy crap. This kid's a looker.

He's gonna be a total chick magnet here in a few years.

[SYLPH] Uh. Yeah. I'm all right.

Hey, lean forward for just a second.

Uh. 'Kay.

[RUDEUS] He's pretty cooperative when he's not being screamed at.

Calling it now, he's gonna be a dude magnet, too.

[gasps]

[RUDEUS] Hey! Close your eyes.

You'll have to wash your clothes at home.

There. All done.

[SYLPH] Th-Thank you.

[ROXY] They're fairly easy to recognize:

they all have emerald green hair and red gems in their foreheads.

So don't you dare go anywhere near them.

[RUDEUS] His forehead is smooth and white.

Okay, safe. He's not one of those dangerous Superds.

But, those ears.

[RUDEUS] You know, kids like that won't stop

unless you learn to fight back.

Are... Are you sure the way I look

doesn't scare you or anything?

No way, my master was Migurdian.

Are you a demon, too?

I'm not sure. My dad says that I'm not.

[RUDEUS] He doesn't know? At his age? That's odd.

Mom's human. My dad's half elf.

[RUDEUS] Nice, I knew it! Of course this world has elves!

But my hair color isn't the same as either of my parents.

[cries]

Huh? Wait, please don't cry! There, there.

[RUDEUS] Sounds like his home life is a little complicated.

But no one should get pelted with mud

just for their hair color.

[RUDEUS] Just thinking about it pisses me off.

[SYLPH] Um. Why did you help me?

[RUDEUS] My father always told me that

I should be an ally to the weak.

[SYLPH] But the other kids might not like you now.

I'd rather play with you than a bunch of bullies.

Huh?

We are friends now, aren't we?

[gasps]

[RUDEUS] Unless you're too busy with chores or something?

[SYLPH] Mm-mm!

[RUDEUS chuckles]

[RUDEUS] This guy.

A little more confidence and the girls will be all over him.

A few might even come my way if we stick together.

You know, I never introduced myself!

My name is Rudeus. And you?

It's Sylph.

[RUDEUS] Sylph? That's a cool name!

You're like a wind spirit!

Yeah.

[RUDEUS giggles]

[RUDEUS] Woohoo! What do you want to play?

I don't know.

I've never played with a friend before.

[RUDEUS] Yeah, I guess he's never really had one, huh?

I feel bad for him.

Though, I don't really have friends, either.

That trick you did before. Do it again.

Trick?

Like when you made warm water go all sploosh from your hands,

and then you made that woosh of hot air.

Oh. Magic.

[SYLPH] Can I do it, too?

[RUDEUS] Sure, if you learn the right incantations. I think.

"Incantations"?

Do you want to?

Uh--

Okay! Then we'll start your training right away.

[RUDEUS] I'm home, Father!

[RUDEUS] Father?

[PAUL] Do you know why I'm upset with you?

[RUDEUS] Nope. Is this about Roxy's panti-- holy relic?

Uh, no sir, I don't.

Interesting.

I hear you punched Ms. Eto's boy Somal today.

[RUDEUS sighs] My stash is safe. Wait, what?

Did you say today?

[PAUL] I did.

[RUDEUS] Aha. I gotcha.

Must be the brat who was bullying Sylph.

I'm not sure what you heard, Father,

but I promise you--

Enough! When you do something wrong,

you apologize first!

I was playing by myself and I heard voices--

[PAUL] No excuses!

[RUDEUS] His mind's made up,

and he has no intention of hearing me out.

[PAUL] What's that look for?

[RUDEUS] I could apologize and get it over with,

but I don't think that would be best for Paul.

Well then? Why won't you say anything?

[RUDEUS] Because you'll just yell at me to not make excuses.

What?

You want to shout and make me apologize

before I can explain?

Must be nice to lord that kind of power over a kid.

Rudy!

[slap]

[RUDEUS] Father. I have always put in the utmost effort

to be a good son to you and Mother.

Well, that's beside the point.

No, it isn't.

I've worked hard to earn your trust,

and you took someone else's word.

You yelled at me, you raised your hand to me,

and still you refuse to listen.

And? You injured little Somal!

I won't apologize even if that is my fault.

I'm proud of what I did today.

Wait, hang on. Tell me what happened.

I thought you told me "no excuses."

But please don't worry about it, Father.

The next time I see three kids ganging up on someone

who won't fight back, I'll simply ignore it.

In fact, I'll even jump in myself

and make it four against one.

I'll be sure to let everyone know

that that's the Greyrat family way.

But once I grow up and leave home,

I'll never use the Greyrat name again.

I'll be too ashamed to belong to a family

that ignores v*olence and accepts verbal abuse.

[RUDEUS] You'd better take the L, Paul.

I know you can't tell, but I spent two decades

weaseling my way out of unwinnable arguments.

And this time, I'm completely in the right.

You haven't got a chance.

[PAUL] I'm sorry. I was wrong.

Tell me what happened.

[RUDEUS] Hi, Mother!

[ZENITH] Welcome back, Rudy. Did you have fun today?

[RUDEUS] Yeah, I made a new friend.

[ZENITH] You did? How wonderful!

[PAUL] That could have gone better.

I expect you to give that son...

[PAUL] Somal did have one heck of a black eye.

Just look at what he did!

[PAUL] Rudeus matured so quickly.

I was almost relieved to hear he'd done something so childish.

Even so. He's already a Saint-Class water mage.

Of course he would have trouble relating with the other kids.

I only meant to scold him a little.

Where did I go wrong?

How stupid.

I want to show him those with power

shouldn't resort to v*olence, and yet...

What's the matter? You look gloomy.

[PAUL] Mm. Ah. I had a little fight with Rudy earlier.

That's not like you.

I was this close to telling him to leave.

I bet he would have done it without a second thought.

Just like that.

You mean like you did?

[PAUL chuckles]

[PAUL] I wonder if this is how my dad felt.

I wish I'd gotten to apologize.

[RUDEUS] And it's summer again.

Those bratty kids kept

coming after me and Sylph for a while,

but they're pretty easy to take care of.

That one mom keeps showing up to complain.

But, if we're being honest, I think she's

more interested in Paul than her kid's wellbeing.

She just wants an excuse to come see him. Stupid.

[sighs] Why is it so hot? It sucks out here.

I'm sorry. Am I late?

Nope! I just got here.

[RUDEUS] I didn't.

I did it!

[RUDEUS] Sylph's mana has grown a lot

in the past six months.

He can train for hours at a time now.

So I guess the idea that there are limits

on a person's magical reserves is total bunk.

Hey! I wanna learn that one you did

where you made a warm breeze!

Oh, that?

For that one, you conjure water, and then apply fire to it.

You didn't even have to say anything out loud.

[RUDEUS] Hm? Silent spellcasting.

I think it might be kind of hard for a beginner.

So? Show me how.

[RUDEUS] Let me think.

[RUDEUS sighs] Okay.

You know how when you say an incantation,

you feel all your mana rush through

your body into your fingertips?

[SYLPH] Mm.

[RUDEUS] You gotta focus on that feeling for a specific spell,

but then recreate it without saying the words.

Does that make sense?

Try it with an easy one.

[SYLPH] 'Kay!

[SYLPH grunting]

[RUDEUS] It's hard to teach something you do

by feeling alone. Even Roxy couldn't do it.

Maybe wordless casting really is special.

Actually, I kinda hope it is.

I had nothing going for me in my old life.

Would a convenient skill or two be too much to ask for?

[SYLPH] I did it! Rudy, did you see that?

[SYLPH giggles] I did it! I did it!

Way to go!

[SYLPH giggles] I did it! I figured it out!

Hey, Sylph! Wait up!

Sylph, come on!

[sighs]

[RUDEUS sighs]

[RUDEUS] He really is a looker.

Even a dude like me can see it.

Dammit. I'm jealous.

The old me had a friend like this in junior high,

but "she" was a "girl."

She wasn't into me, but I thought about her all the time.

Even after I found out she'd got married,

I could still punch my clown about three times a day

to the ol' "childhood friend" trope.

[RUDEUS] Hurry up, Sylph!

Hey, I'm back.

There you are. Welcome home.

Young Master and... friend?

Nice to meet you.

I've drawn a bath for you.

Great. Thank you.

Follow me, Sylph!

[SYLPH] O-Okay.

Perfect. What's the matter?

[RUDEUS] You'll get cold standing around like that.

Uh, yeah.

Then get undressed and hop in.

Uh, 'kay.

[RUDEUS] Come on, now.

[SYLPH gasps]

You're old enough to do this yourself.

[SYLPH gasping]

I don't know what you're so embarrassed for.

But these gotta come off, too.

[SYLPH gasps] No. Please don't.

I'm serious, you're gonna get sick.

Just do it.

Cut it out!

[RUDEUS] Trust me, bud, I know exactly how you feel.

The old me wouldn't wanna bathe with other dudes, either.

Welcome to the weird d*ck club, champ.

I promise I won't laugh at you.

That's not what I... Rudy, no!

[RUDEUS] What the hell's this kid got going on down there?

[RUDEUS] You kidding me with this?

Don't make me get naked alone.

[RUDEUS] All right, fine. Bathe like that.

But you're gonna have to change at some point.

--[RUDEUS] Unless I do this! --[RUDEUS] Gotcha!

[SYLPH gasps]

[SYLPH screams]

[RUDEUS] What flashed before my eyes in that moment

was not the pure short sword I've grown accustomed to.

Now, it wasn't some dark blade

covered in sinister designs, either.

What should have been there, simply wasn't.

And what was there stunned me to my core.

In my old life, I'd only ever seen one on my monitor

while I was "taming the beast," so to speak.

And then I realized what I'd just done was not okay at all.

He was a she.

I think we should talk about what just happened.

I'm sorry.

[PAUL] I won't fly off the handle this time.

I refuse to make that mistake twice.

Just tell me why you did it, kid.

We were wet from the rain.

I thought she was gonna catch a cold.

[PAUL] But, she said "no," didn't she?

Yes. I'm sorry.

This is only going to get more important as you grow up,

so I need you to pay close attention.

You have to be respectful.

Okay. I'm sorry.

I won't do it again.

Don't say that to me.

Go apologize to Sylphiette. Okay?

Sylphiette? Of course.

Is she ever gonna forgive me?

[PAUL chuckles] Ah, don't you worry.

As long as you apologize sincerely, I'm sure she will.

[PAUL] I know how it feels when the girl you like rejects you.

It seems my particular fondness for women runs in the family.

But you're such a smart boy, my son.

I know you'll learn a lot from this failure.

[PAUL] I still worry about you, but I'm so hopeful.

I'm sorry, Sylphiette!

Your hair is really short,

so I actually thought you were a boy this whole time!

[ALL gasp]

--[ZENITH gasps] --[SYLPHIE cries]

[ZENITH] Oh, goodness.

[RUDEUS gasps]

[PAUL] On second thought, my son might be a total idiot.

[grunts]

[RUDEUS pants]

[laughs] Not your best effort, kid!

Are you still having trouble making up with Sylphiette,

or is it somethin' else?

Yeah. She's still upset

and my swordsmanship hasn't improved, either.

You want some friendly advice from your old man?

Absolutely.

Uhh, I don't know.

Shall I lick your boots?

Eager, are we?

Listen, Rudy. Women like our strength,

but sometimes it's important to show them

our softer aspects as well.

Ohh.

Think for a second: If someone clearly stronger than you

were to chase after you with naked lust,

how would that make you feel, son?

I guess I'd be scared?

Of course. So show her your vulnerable side instead.

I get it! But where do I start?

Next time you see Sylphiette,

be honest with her about all the feelings you've bottled up.

Let her know how much you miss her

or that you're worried she's been avoiding you.

After that, it's all up to her.

But if it goes well, she might even console you.

[RUDEUS gasps] So what do I do if it doesn't go well?

You come right back to me

and I'll tell you what the next move is.

Whoa. That's so cool!

You've got backup plans and everything!

You know it! Now.

[RUDEUS gasps]

[PAUL] Get going!

Listen, about before.

[RUDEUS panting]

Are you okay? Rudy?

I... I was just thinking that I haven't seen

your c-cute face around here lately,

and that's a real shame, you know?

Yeah! 'Cause you're, like, really cute,

and your hair is pretty,

so have you thought about growing it out?

Huh? Not really.

[RUDEUS gasps]

I'm afraid you don't like me anymore, Sylphie.

[gasps]

I'm sorry. But you're wrong.

I promise I don't hate you or anything, Rudy.

Are you sure?

Can we just go back to normal?

[RUDEUS] A cute, kind girl my own age.

I have no idea how to be friends with someone like her.

And now that I know she's a girl,

it's hard not to think about the future.

But she wants our relationship to stay exactly the same.

[RUDEUS] So, I won't think too hard about it.

And to the best of my ability,

I'm going to cherish my first real friend in this new world.

[ALL laughing]

Hang on.

What in the hell did I just teach my six-year-old son?